The Making Of
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Director Lizzie Gottlieb talks about Nicky's reaction to being a star, what she's learned about Asperger Syndrome and what it was like making the film while pregnant with twins.
What led you to make this film?
I always wanted to make a fiction film about my brother. He was the most fascinating, funny, mysterious, difficult person I knew. But I couldn’t figure out how to capture him. Nothing seemed to do him justice. I literally sat up in bed one morning and thought, “It should be a documentary!”
When I first started making the film, we hadn’t even heard of Asperger Syndrome. So it began as a film about a unique individual whom I loved. About six months later, I started meeting other people with Asperger Syndrome. And then the film became about something larger.
What were some of the challenges you faced in making this film?
I thought it would take me six months to make this film and it took six years.
This is partly because I wanted to watch things progress in Nicky’s life. But also I think it was hard to capture my family the way I wanted to. My family is pretty happy and very appreciative of all the wonderful things about my brother. It was hard to pursue and film the harder parts of the struggle. The less happy parts.
I had extraordinary partners along the way without whom the film would not exist. Nicky and my parents were so open and willing to be filmed. My producers—Mitchell Lemsky, Michael Young and Jen Small—my editor Ben Forgash and my friend and advisor Gill Dennis stuck with me for years and the film was formed as a collaboration of all of our work.
How did your brother feel about being the subject of your documentary?
During the filming, Nicky was completely willing to be filmed, very natural and unself-conscious in front of the camera. He seemed neither excited nor irritated by it. He said he enjoyed getting together and having a project. Now that it is finished, he seems to be enjoying it a lot. He says, “I love being in the spotlight!”
Did you learn anything new about Asperger Syndrome during the filming of TODAY'S MAN?
I learned everything I know about Asperger Syndrome while I was making the film. Asperger Syndrome was only recognized in this country in 1994. At that point, Nicky was 16 and we were no longer looking for a diagnosis for him. Just trying to figure out how to help him live his life.
We had never met anyone who was even remotely like him. And we assumed no one else existed. When he was 20 we started hearing about it. And my mother and I went to a meeting for adults with Asperger Syndrome. It was stunning to walk into a room full of people who were all like my brother. For 20 years we thought we were alone. Now it turns out there were many, many families who were having similar experiences to ours. It was shocking and comforting and somehow funny. But still it offered no solution. There is no cure, no treatment and really very few resources for adults with Asperger Syndrome.
It is so important that we work to change this.
What didn’t get included in your film that you would have liked to show?
Nicky takes an aerobics class once a week with some middle-aged ladies. His aerobics moves are totally over the top and gleeful. I wish I could have filmed that.
Were there any technical challenges you faced while shooting, and if so, how did you resolve them?
The trickiest day was when I was nursing my newborn twins and I needed to film Nicky going to his new apartment. It was a scene I knew I couldn’t miss. But I had never left the babies for more than a few minutes. And my husband Michael had never been alone with the two of them. It was a freezing cold day. I fed the babies, left them with Michael and ran uptown to shoot Nicky and our father. I started shooting and realized the microphones weren’t working. I made Nicky and my father wait in the hallway of the apartment without going in. It was dark and overheated. I called my husband, who had shot most of the film, and had him explain what to do with the mics while he juggled two screaming infants. I shot the scene and zoomed back home.
What has the audience response been so far? Have the people featured in the film seen it, and if so, what did they think?
The audience response has been wonderful so far. It is amazing to make a film about one boy, one family. And then to realize that there are so many families out there with similar struggles and similar joys. Nicky likes it, but is bored with watching it. My parents have been extraordinarily great about the whole process of the film. I think they like it a lot. My mother doesn’t like how her hair looks.
The independent film business is a difficult one. What keeps you motivated?
Before I was an independent filmmaker, I was a theater director. This is my first feature-length film. After working in theater it is amazing to me to have a project that doesn’t disappear when you are finished with it. That you can continue to show. But this way—independently—is the only way I could imagine getting this film made. I needed the freedom to tell the story as I wanted to and to take the time I needed to.
Why did you choose to present your film on public television?
I am so honored to have my film chosen for broadcast on PBS. It is incredible to have the opportunity to reach such a large audience. There is nowhere else I’d rather have my film shown.
What didn’t you get done when you were making your film?
In the middle of making the film I got pregnant with twins. I was on bed rest for four months. And then I had infant twins. So for a year or so I didn’t get anything on the film done at all. But I think this ended up helping. It allowed me to come back to it with a new perspective.
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