Subprime. Bankruptcy. Short sales. They’re three of the many words I am so tired of hearing. They all mean the same thing in the end: People are losing their homes for reasons they never understood in the first place.

In January, I started the journey of buying a house in the New Jersey area. After a couple of months of looking at houses I would have been scared to walk into alone, I thought I had found the perfect house. 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, a pool, over an acre of land… WAY too much house for a single girl…but then again I do have a cat, a dog and those annoying hermit crabs I won down the shore 3 years ago. (Shouldn’t they be gone by now? Like goldfish won at the town fair?)

I saw the house and immediately fell in love with it. I pictured my future there. I loved it so much I went inside three times to talk to the owner and finally (probably breaking all the rules) asked him what I needed to do to get this house. He and his wife told me they WANTED me to have the house because they saw what it meant to me. I thought it was a done deal. I was ready to move in that day. That day was in March.

I went back two days later to show my parents the house, and the owner told me something about a “short sale.” He said he got very sick and took out money on the house. The bank lent him so much money that, now, he couldn’t afford the payment, and the bank was ready to foreclose. I felt for this man -- a man with whom I had already shared many phone calls and who was leaving me many of his personal items to help me start off life in my new home.

I didn’t realize this short sale, foreclosure, or whatever you want to call it would become not only his nightmare, but mine as well. Suddenly, what I thought would be a relatively quick process became a never-ending story.

I sat and sat, waiting for word that the house was mine – or any word at all. I spent a lot of money getting home and septic inspections. (Money I couldn’t afford.) I emailed and called my realtor, my lawyer, everyone. After months and months, I still didn’t have an answer. I was out of attorney review and found out that some bank needed to give its approval. What? I had no idea what this meant.

After another two months, nothing had changed, except my realtor stopped returning my calls. So did my attorney. All my money was sitting in escrow. I was helpless. I called the president of the bank myself and tried to get some answers. He told me that it was up to the investors. Investors in what? I was completely lost. I kept trying to get answers, and I just kept hearing, “Well, this process could take awhile.”

I never did get the house. Wait, I take that back.

On July 26th (remember, I had my bid accepted in March!) I exercised my right to cancel my bid (a right I had wisely written in my contract). The response was amazing. My lawyer called. My realtor called. The investors called. The seller’s attorney called. After months of not being able to return my phone calls, they were all available to call me less than two hours after I pulled the plug on the deal. They all said they were very sorry and explained they had been working hard behind the scenes. (I guess they just didn’t want to bother me with that info earlier.) Then they gave me “good news” -- the bank and investors approved my bid. Sorry guys, too late.

If you’re one of those lucky ones shopping for a house and you hear the words “subject to bank approval,” run. Run away, and don’t look back…unless you have a year or so to find out if you get the house. Or, you could just wait a month or so and withdraw your bid. Then you should have everyone scrambling to get you that answer in an hour or so.

I finally found another house (after yet another bid fell through during attorney review), and I will hopefully move in before the end of September.

I just wish the owner of the first house I fell in love with had the same luck.