Authored by: Stephanie May, NBR Summer 2009 Intern
Judging from the whimpers coming from my debit card, I am pretty sure my holiday weekend was a fiscal fiasco. I don't know how your Little Black Book looks, but one peek at mine and you would think I paid for all of the fireworks in Washington. Coming off of that 3 day holiday blowout... I was feeling like a financial failure. My stress level was high and my balance was low.
As I was reflecting on my money makeover, I was reminded of a piece of advice nutritionists give first time dieters. They would be quick to warn you that over-dieting is a death sentence. If you deprive yourself of everything you love, you'll be lucky if the diet lasts even a few weeks... and as for that life change? Forget about it. You need to keep indulging in the things you love most (cheesecake?) ... but in moderation (one slice, not four.)
Then I was reminded of a comment one of my readers posted after taking a look at my Weekend Workout. Elizabeth said:
I wonder, if you are extra thrifty during the week, then maybe it's okay to spend more on the weekends. I often find myself skipping a lunch out with coworkers on a Wednesday so that I can go out to drinks or dinner on a Friday. I think it should be a matter of how much you spend overall, how much you can balance your budget.
And that's when it hit me. Being fiscally fit is great, and making conscious decisions about money is key. But as some of my readers advised, the point of having money is to use it to enjoy your life! Instead of asking myself to be a frugal freak all week long, I need to strike a balance between when it makes sense to cut back, and when it's time to let loose a little.
If we were strict money dieters 24/7, I imagine we would look a bit like Scrooge. Remember him? Counting his gold coins in a dark room while his poor but happy employee rushed off to spend the holidays with his family. Bob Cratchet didn't have much, but compared to Scrooge's greedy solitude, his life looked like a million bucks!
We need to strike a balance between when we are going to save, and when we are going to enjoy the benefits of our savings success. I'm proposing this: We do everything we can to pinch pennies during the week. Then we can reward ourselves with some fun, food, friends and a bit more freedom on the weekends.
Disclaimer: Like any diet, this does NOT give you permission to eat an entire cake. Nor should you drain your entire bank account. Like it says on any alcoholic beverage, "Please enjoy responsibly."
Last week, I kept my promise and brought my lunch to work twice. This week I have decided to take it up a notch. I went to the grocery store on Sunday night, and for 37 dollars I bought enough food to last me all week. I am going to spend as little money as humanly possible until the weekend. That way, I can eliminate wasteful spending, save money, enjoy my time off, and still come out ahead in the end. How's that for a compromise?
Comments
Good compromise, and I will do that too! Except I don't have a job until September, so its going to be a dwindling account until then.
We learned early in life, how to budget and plan for the future (retirement is closer than you think) But, we also learned how to share our good fortune with others and got much more in return. So, save today and you will be richer tomorrow, in many more ways than one. Congratulations! You are already seeing the rewards.
Hello! MODERATION is KEY to success :) Good job! I think it's totally nice to reward yourself "little treats" or small spending perks when you know you've stuck to your budget plan. Good deal...keep at it!
I think it's great that all of you are becoming "fiscally fit." It's just too bad you didn't start this while mom and I were footing the bills.
I completely agree. When it comes to spending your money, it's all about give and take. It blows my mind when I mindlessly buy lunch everyday when I'm at work instead of just packing it. It's depressing. When you give yourself time to plan ahead, the difference is huge! Plus buying a meal by yourself when you could be enjoying it with a group of friends on a friday night makes no sense!
I find it most difficult to pack my lunch and take it to work because one fact (and no its not laziness) ... I work in the National Press Building and there is a very diverse food court here (with five guys!) and even if i bring some of the pasta that i have purposefully made massive amounts of the night before, i still go down and get something because i just cant resist the smell. I need to go on a fiscal and food diet! However, my logic is this, if I eat a double cheeseburger with onions, mushrooms, and fries (my mouth is about to start watering right now, see? I can't resist) I say to myself, I shouldn't be eating this, but I will go on a two mile run when I get home and work it off. How do I apply this logic to money? I shouldn't be spending this much money, so I'll ... work it off? I'm an unpaid intern though... help!
More great insights, It's great to see you sharing personal experiences attacking the issues we all face!
As we say in the financial planning business, P
AY YOURSELF FIRST. One of the techniques that is most successful in assisting people to balance between saving for the future and spending in the present is to put long term savings at the top of the budget list, and make it automatic. No decisions needed, no saving what is "left over". Make 5% or 10% ( even 1% is better than nothing )of your "income" an automatic savings bucket every month, and don't even consider it available.
Why not have your friends over to your place for drinks, etcr? A restaurant stays in business just so it can sell you alcohol. You can still splurge and also spend less by planning ahead and being the host - just be sure to rotate hosts - Ive found that a designated host often turns out to be the designated looser financially speaking.
It would be interesting for you to ask your readers what money means to them. Took a self-help test years ago about what money represents. It turned out that it represents security for me and love for my other half. You can see the difficulty. Knowing what money represents, love, power, security, etc. may help us when we are trying to stay on a dollar diet but have urges that are hard to resist. Keep up the good work. Stu
Stephanie, Your blogs get better and better. After reading your previous blog, I was thinking about the point you raised in this one about being on a diet and totally depriving yourself of the things you love. It's so true! Even Weight Watchers allows people to have desserts! Recently, I went on a strict financial diet. I was so restricive in my "diet" that I tossed it out completely, especially when my daughter came home after being away for several months. All it takes is something like that to throw you completely off the wagon. I also agree with what you said about not going overboard when you do decide to splurge. In this blog, your idea is like setting short-term goals that are manageable with frequent rewards. Another thing that I think is equally important is to set long-term goals for getting something big that you couldn't otherwise afford and for setting aside money for savings. I really appreciate your thoughtful messages. They keep me focused on how I am managing my money.
Absolutely!!! We do need to enjoy money and strike a balance... but it is also important to have financial stability so we don't have to stress out about it as much. I wish I could eat four pieces of cake, but I know that would give me a stomach ache... as would spending way too much money!
Great advice! I definitely let a little loose on the weekend, but what gets me is when I still spend too much on the weekends. It feels like a diet, but more like a yo-yo diet. But cooking and staying in during the week definitely makes going out on the weekends feel like a treat!
Your disclaimer "Please Enjoy Responsibly" is absolutely key for understanding the balance between rewarding yourself for your hard-earned (or someone else's hard earned) money and keeping you out of debt. These things add up; even buying lunch in downtown DC at a Cosi or Corner Bakery type place is at least $10 (especially if they weigh the salads!) and diet coke. Makes me miss McDonald's dollar value menu.
But as you and Elizabeth said--it is possible to save if you take baby steps and prioritize how you want to spend your money. Another part of this responsibility is not necessarily choosing to "diet" during the week and then "feast" on the weekends, but also keeping one's long-term "cravings" in mind. I had to do this in London last year when I lived there for six months where the exchange rate was still 2 to 1: my classmates spend literally thousands of dollars throughout the semester from buying alcohol everyday, eating out at British pubs (which, I can promise you my home-cooked food is better than a British pub!), shopping and paying expensive cover charges for clubs at least 3 times a week. What did I do? I still went out, socialized and enjoyed the city, but I cooked almost every meal, bought little to no alcohol (that was the biggest saving), and only went shopping twice the entire semester (Primark, anyone?).
Where did that get me? I had the funds to travel and fully experience 15 European cities and see three different musicals. If I had spent like my peers, I would have only been able to go to about half of them. Traveling and sightseeing was my "weekend" and all the stuff in between were like weekly employee lunches.
I really like this advice...I know i'm definitely going to enjoy and remember the festivities with my friends and family on the weekends more than the lunches with my coworkers throughout the week. Focusing your hard earned cash in areas that you will cherish might relieve some of that built up stress from the long work week. keep it up!
I agree--there's no point in dieting unless you can enjoy the benefits! For money, the point of "dieting" is to eventually enjoy the benefits of saving. I say the fourth of july in DC is a cause for celebration--just dont slip during the week!
I'm glad to see my comment could help you. I've been trying to stick to a money diet too, and your advice has really been helping.