Emma has recieved flowers from well-wishers from all over the world.
It's been a week now
I think it is completely unreal. On Friday, July 29, it was a week since it all happened for me, but it feels more like it was yesterday. People come to me and say, "I hope it goes better now, it was a week ago." Whether it's a week, several months, or several years, it does not mean it's easy to forget this, to forgive, to adapt. It takes much more time, especially for those of us who were victims and for family members.The world will go on, I understand. But for me, so it's going to take so much longer than a week...
Everything is heavy, and I struggle all the time. But I must say that you send so many fine words, so many gifts, flowers, cards, etc. that it helps me a lot. I am so grateful, I am so grateful for everything in my life. I've learned to appreciate everything.
My opinion on the monster
I have so many questions (for the shooter). Why? Where was your humanity? Where were your feelings? Why? Why? Why? There are so many questions but “Why” is the question that comes over and over again. I so want to meet you in court, I so want to see you without some form of uniform and weapons. I have so wanted to see if you dare to lift your gaze to me and tell me what I wonder…
I assume you're smiling now for yourself in the cell you are in…I assume you feel proud and feel that you have won. Well, I will tell you this. I'm smiling now because you have not won... Our nation is stronger and together through all the torches and flowers, and we will build everything up again.
I know that hate is a very big word, and I have never hated anyone, just frowned upon them. But YOU? I hate you. I hate you with all my heart.
Exhausted and grateful
I have anger in my body for your taking a uniform that would mean peace and security and making it into hatred and insecurity. I have hatred in my body because you are directly ugly and because I will never forget your eyes, your laugh and your face. I have sorrow in my body for all those you have taken from me. I have fear in my body thatyou managed to take power over us. I have joy in my body because I have survived and I will continue to fight for all that is gone, and myself. I feel empty. I have so many questions that I will never get answers to. I have so many emotions.
My future is ruined. A little soul in me has always wanted to go the police college and complete it, the dream is so far away now. I can not think of a good time to be able to take on the uniform, or take the weapon. I will not be able to go on shooting practice and hear the shots. Wait, I withdraw the statement that my future is ruined, it just is displaced... I will NEVER let you feel the feeling that you've won over us. You have never been close, and you'll never win either.
Words are poor
Today I have chosen to go to work, and I reckon that people have read in the newspaper that I work at a police station. You can imagine how I felt when I saw my colleague come in the door wearing the (police) uniform. I could not do anything except look down at the ground and feel the tears, I walked slowly toward him and hugged him.
Hell on Utøya
I look behind me all the time and I run when I hear loud noises. I think all the time, I cannot shed a tear. It feels like it's so empty inside me… I just think of all the missing and dead. I think of myself as I swam, I think that I live. I think that I look forward to seeing all my friends and that I can hug them and thank God that I have seen them.
Words are so poor in this context. I cannot say anything except thank you, thank you for the concern. Thank you so nice words, nice message, nice flowers, fine gifts. Thank you for everything. I am so grateful while I weep in sorrow for all those I have lost. Many of my friends are dead and several are missing. I cannot understand it.
We will not be silent!...We are here for each other, no one is alone. I send warm thoughts to all families, and thank you again for your support.