Vet Suicide on the Rise

Without knowing your daughter and son-in-law it is hard to answer with any precision. However, in general I would ask some open-ended questions, and let them talk if and when they are ready. In addition, there are numerous venues available where they can talk with other veterans. The Veterans Service Organizations, for example, have really made it a mission to reach out to retuning veterans.

I am pleased that your family has good things to say about the VA Medical Center at Togus. When I was there, I learned that they are caring for about 500 veterans with PTSD related to deployment to Iraq or Afghanistan. To enhance care for these veterans, as well as those from prior eras, VA has created a special PTSD treatment team to work closely with the primary care clinics, and this year, we'll be expanding the PTSD program.

Families, as well as VA, are important resources for returning veterans with PTSD. How they can best work together varies from person to person and family to family. Family support can help to prevent mental health problems. When problems do occur, it is often the family that recognizes something is wrong and helps the veteran to get care. Other times, families help veterans stay in treatment.

In deciding whether to talk about combat experiences or not, it is often best for families to follow veterans' leads, being willing to listen when veterans wants to talk, or being willing to let them heal on their own when that is what they need. However, it is important for families to be aware that symptoms of PTSD can include avoidance, as well as symptoms like re-experiencing traumas in nightmares or flashbacks. If a veteran is reticent to talk about what he or she went through and appears to be suffering or having difficulty re-engaging in civilian life, their families should encourage them to go to the VA for an evaluation to see if they would benefit from treatment.

Fortunately, it sounds like your family member is already in treatment. Learning about PTSD and about treatments that work can help you help them. In addition, you might ask your daughter and son-in-law if they think it would be helpful to arrange a family meeting with their providers at the VA, so you can plan to work together to help them get well.

Please extend my thanks to your daughter and son-in-law for their military service. Let us all hope they received a good "welcome home" by their family, friends, neighbors, employers, and community.

I am glad to hear, as is usually the case, that they are receiving quality care from VA. Regarding how to speak to your daughter and son-in-law about their traumatic war experiences, especially since they are both diagnosed with PTSD, consider allowing them to set the pace of what they want to say, when they want to say it, and how much they want to share. Your offer to support them is enough to show you care. And be prepared to listen when they want to talk.

Your support of their post-war recovery can be improved by going to these two websites to learn more about PTSD so you can avoid the myths and negative stereotypes often portrayed in the media. The first web site is the National Center for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, operated by VA. Here is a link to a PTSD Guide for Families.

The second web site is the Department of Labor's new anti-stigma information for employers.

Together, we can learn more about PTSD and how we can work with our returning veterans so they can transition to civilian life as best as possible under difficult circumstances.