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Patience

A Small Victory For The Clean-Up Queen

Posted by Patience on October 9, 2009 at 4:58 AM in Parenting tipsTalking with kids
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clean-up sadness.jpg

I'll admit it, I put off helping her cleaning her room. There are moments when my tricks work but often times this dear girl requires me to be even more creative still. The only problem being that I had no creativity in my heart this particular day. I just needed her to do what I asked. Just do it.

I feverishly picked up toys while she laid on her bed, her forearm to her head, crying dramatically. "I just don't wanna clean up my room, I can't do it, I just can't do it."
She looked like a queen that had just been asked to clean the stables, with a toothbrush.

"I know you don't, but we must, I'll help you." I replied with little emotion in my voice.
I gave her a very clear and easy task, there was more wailing. I explained we will need to pack up some toys and put them away if she is unwilling to pick them up. Logical consequence, still no dice, just more drama.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I'm not cleaning my room." she wailed. I wanted to laugh but instead told her it was okay because there was still more to do and she had another chance. She said she needed a break and laid down once again. The room was almost done at this point, after almost 45 minutes, what felt like a very long 45 minutes. All was picked up except for a large pile of dirty clothes in the corner of the room. Out of no where, she got up and started picking up the clothes and carrying them to the hamper. I stood in shock while she came back for another trip until the pile was gone.

"Mom, will you take my picture?" she said while she stood next to the hamper.
"Yes, I would love to." I snapped a few shots and sighed.
clean-up recovery.jpg

"I'll get these too mom." She picked up the laundry in the bathroom.
"Thank you." I said.

She left to play, the storm passing as quickly as it came. Some days it isn't pretty, but it is a victory, no matter how small.

Having meltdowns at your house too? Got a drama mama like me? Check out this guide to help tackle the stickier moments of parenting.


5 Comments

Manic Mommy writes...

Stupid 'teachable moments' It's so much easier to do it when they're not around.

Sweet pout!

sharon writes...

If I understand correctly, you cleaned her room for her and she refused to do it when asked. Sounds like "the queen" needs some or more serious consequences for not doing what she's told.

Eleanor writes...

Oh my. Have we been there? We have been there, returned, and been back a few times over. (My daughter is almost 12). After reading your post, I checked out the "guides" link that you included. VERY helpful. I think THE hardest thing to do as a parent is to hold back the parental emotion and be a robot, so to speak. It's just not always possible. Sometimes, we parents are just human and we go ahead and clean our kids' rooms because we just can't take it anymore. Thank you, Patience, for directing me to those links and for your candid reports of your own parenting (you and your sisters). I benefit from it all. Parenting is not done well in a vacuum. It's good to know that I am not alone.

Ellie writes...

The room becomes overwhelming. I would pick an article. (books) Tell her to just go in and put away the books. Later in the day, it was pick up the clothes.Finally when the room is done, it might take 2 days. I would pick one evening for her to do books again etc. You can space your chores as you wish. But a piece at a time.

Lyrics writes...

Oh my. Have we been there? We have been there, returned, and been back a few times over. (My daughter is almost 12). After reading your post, I checked out the "guides" link that you included. VERY helpful. I think THE hardest thing to do as a parent is to hold back the parental emotion and be a robot, so to speak. It's just not always possible. Sometimes, we parents are just human and we go ahead and clean our kids' rooms because we just can't take it anymore. Thank you, Patience, for directing me to those links and for your candid reports of your own parenting (you and your sisters). I benefit from it all. Parenting is not done well in a vacuum. It's good to know that I am not alone.

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