The Olympics makes me crazy. Exactly how many winter sports exceed speeds of 75 miles an hour? I'm sure Cousin Ellen could tell me but I'm loathe to ask.
The Olympics makes me crazy because it opens my children's eyes to an entire new world of dangerous sports. Someone recorded a few nights of coverage and the boys began to watch them the way they obsess about a favorite cartoon. There was a ridiculous amount of half pipe snowboarding. At one point on Twitter I openly wondered if a practice foam half pipe was cheaper that a couple of college educations.
There were all manner of questions about the luge and then questions about the horrific crash of Nodar Kumaritashvili (thanks for no warning on that one, NBC and then for replaying it excessively and unexpectedly before children's bed times). You can only change the channel so many times before you just call it a day and send the kids to bed early.
Bobsledding was perhaps the trickiest.
Ethan: Mom (pointing to the bobsledding icon on the television). Is that bumper cars for snow?
K: Nope. It's called bobsledding.
K: A little bit like your sled except they go really, really fast.
Ethan: How fast?
K; 100 miles an hour. Faster than most cars.
He did a triple take. Literally. It was the funniest thing I have ever seen. The light bulb went on and he began to plot his own personal bobsledding adventures. For years I have had a dream to put a water slide in the ravine by my house but with all this snow, the kids instantly thought a bobsledding track would be a good idea. Luckily we sent them to bed before the succession of bobsleds flipped over and only the parents had to look on in horror as the helmeted heads bounced against the ice.
With that we move on to hockey and the kids crept down the stairs to watch from behind the wall, hoping we didn't notice. We busted them and they begged for hockey to be recorded. Then it's curling. Derek starts to explain curling to them in their hiding place and we all laugh because he doesn't know what he is talking about and clearly he never read wikipedia. He claims to have watched curling 20 years ago but I don't believe it. I tell the boys that they can take up curling ANY day. Oops, hockey is back up and there are long discussions about high sticks and fights.
We haven't slept in over two weeks and the only thing saving me is that we live in the mid-Atlantic and despite the winter of lots of snow, it will all be gone in a couple of days. Like the ending of the Winter Olympics, the dreams of traveling 100 miles an hour will be a distant memory. Or so a mom can hope.