The following exchange is from a test Dialogue Group.

4. Introduction
Sat, Aug 21, 1999 - 4:38 AM/EST
jeanne

I've always felt I could respect opposing points of view on issues (i.e., capital punishment, abortion, etc.) even if I completely disagreed with them. I don't feel that way about bigotry.

I grew up trying to get away from my sheltered world. I lived in an all-white, middle class neighborhood in Tulsa, OK, a very segregated city - north side/south side kind of stuff. I wasn't really aware of the segregation, however, until I went to a "magnet school" (voluntarily integrated) during high school. Nothing ominous there - I spent 3 hours a day on a school bus, but I wouldn't change a thing.

Even in high school, I never really thought about race or ethnicity. It just wasn't an issue for me. I'm not saying I didn't notice skin color or appearance - of course you notice that! People who say, "I'm colorblind," bug me - I know what they're trying to convey, but yeesh - how absurd! I had friends of all races, creeds, and sexual orientation, and none of it by design.

Anyway, I'm not sure why I'm here except that I find myself baffled by people's (particularly my parents') negative reactions regarding interracial relationships. I'm 37 years old, and 2 years ago, when I started dating a black man, I discovered that my parents are racists. It still stuns me. I'm happy with whom I've become in life (so far), and I attribute much of that to my parents' efforts in raising me.

So now, here I sit, trying to figure out how I reconcile my utter disdain for people who pass judgment on others based on things like race and religion with my utter gratitude to a couple of people who did a pretty good job of raising me and never (in my opinion) acted with any malice.

Actually, I wish I just didn't care. :-)