Who Killed the Very Reverend Toby Spoon?

The Lowdown, from Your Assistant

Lord Snuffington. Master of the house. Globe-trotting explorer. Worth a fortune.

Snuffington has no apparent motive for doing in the Very Reverend. On the contrary, he has very recently bequeathed his entire fortune to the church through the reverend. The fortune had previously been slated for William Fitzwilliam, a nephew who the lord views as "mentally negligible." The new will was signed yesterday.

The nimble-minded William Fitzwilliam. He is the son of Snuffington's late sister and Snuffington's only living relative. He is betrothed to the fair and lovely Lavinia Hawkmoth.

Fitzwilliam was heir to the vast Snuffington fortune until very recently. He apparently knew of Snuffington's intention to disinherit him, although he denies knowing that the change to the will had already been made.

The exceedingly brilliant but somewhat devious Dr. Graham Taylor-Russell. The one-time professor has a doctorate in mathematics, but currently seems to make his income by gambling, as well as a multitude of illicit dealings. In some quarters he's known as "Graham the Scam," or simply, "Spivy."

According to Lord Snuffington, the doctor pines for "Squeezy" Bittles and, due to Squeezy's incessant amatory advances to the wealthy lord, has even worked himself into fits of jealous rage.

"Squeezy" Bittles. Bitter. Volatile. Prone to nervous breakdowns. Once an actress but no longer performing on stage, Squeezy has had her sights set on Lord Snuffington for several years now... that is, until today, when the lord stated in no uncertain terms that the two would never wed.

Then there's the other matter. After a fair amount of coaxing, she reluctantly admitted to me that she has recently thwarted sexual advances made by our Very Reverend.

Lavinia Hawkmoth. Dainty. Demure. Happily betrothed to William Fitzwilliam. But happiness can come at a high price. Lavinia lives comfortably and is counting on her future husband's inheritance to maintain a lifestyle in the manner to which she has been accustomed.

I asked her if she knew about the change to Lord Snuffington's will. She maintains that she did not.

Dependable old Mrs. Trolleybottom, faithful servant at Hollyshock Manor for 35 years. Trolleybottom, interestingly enough, has motive to kill both Snuffington and Spoon. Fitzwilliam has informed me that, upon Snuffington's death, Trolleybottom will inherit all of the feather dusters within the manor -- an overt insult, meant to demean Trolleybottom's rather lofty status among the household staff. The cause of this falling out between lord and servant has not been ascertained.

Her motive for killing Spoon is more compelling. She claims that the reverend accosted her daughter -- an act that resulted in the daughter's death nine months later while in labor. The child died as well.

Introduction
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