BETTY ROLLIN: Sister Mary Andrew Matesich is no more an ordinary cancer patient than she is an ordinary nun.
At age 18, she joined the Dominican order, attended college, then in just three years got a master's and Ph.D. in chemistry at the University of California at Berkeley. At 39, she became president of Ohio Dominican, a liberal arts university, and in the years following had leadership roles in government, higher education, and community service.Sister MARY ANDREW MATESICH: The sense of being called by God to a different kind of life, a life of service. When we take vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience, it's not because money, sex, and power are bad. They are not bad; they are good. But they are so good that they could distract us from the really important thing, which is love of God and love of neighbor.
ROLLIN: Given that her mother and her aunt had breast cancer, learning that she had it too wasn't a total surprise.
Sister MARY ANDREW: On the other hand, to hear the word "cancer" is such a shock, such a shock. I got mammograms every year, and my cancer grew to more than two inches before it was detected. I know now that I should have said, "Hey, doctor, feel over here up under my arm."ROLLIN: Eleven years ago, at age 54, Sister Mary Andrew had a mastectomy.
Sister MARY ANDREW: You might be a celibate woman and not have children and not be sexually active, but it's defining of you as a woman.
ROLLIN: She resumed her life, but six years ago cancer returned to her lungs, to her liver, and most recently to her bones. Her illness forced her to leave the university, and she came to live at the Dominican assisted living quarters.Do you ever get mad at God?
Sister MARY ANDREW: Oh yes. I was very mad at God for what happened to my mother. I really went through a big issue for some months with God about the amount of suffering my mother had.
ROLLIN: And are you mad at God for what he did to you?
Sister MARY ANDREW: I have been mad, but not as mad. In a sense, we wrestled it out then.
ROLLIN: How do you do that?
Sister MARY ANDREW: You have to express to God what you really feel, and you have to rail and yell, and you have to cry, and gradually there aren't answers, but there's acceptance that comes -- and strength.ROLLIN: And something else came to Sister Mary Andrew, too: a wish to offer herself up for clinical trials.
Sister MARY ANDREW: We are challenged as Christians by Jesus Christ to lay down our lives for one another. I respond to this by laying down my life consciously, choosing to be in these trials, not necessarily be cured -- that's very unusual, but so that we might learn more to help more people. That's a strong motivation for me, too.
Dr. CHARLES SHAPIRO: I think her overriding hopefulness and strength, even in bad times, is somewhat inspirational to me.
Sister MARY ANDREW: It's as though I looked into the eye of the dragon and said, "You may take my life, but you are not going to destroy me." And I don't care if you have cancer, metastatic cancer, or you are diabetic or what, you can still be fully alive and trying to live each day fully alive. That means a lot to me, and that's what I try to do.
