My parent(s) wanted me to never take them in or let them monopolize my life in their later years. They had two hard and fast rules when the four of us kids were growing up-first when we each got to 18 we were to go away to college and graduate. We all did as told. The second rule was when the time came, we were to place them in a nursing home so they were not a distraction to our adult lives. My mom has forgotten all this at 90. Suffering from end stage Alzheimer's, she wants to be home. As my career in retail fizzles out from the declining popularity of stores, I've pivoted to caregiver. We live together again, over 40 years from when I first left home. I sleep on the same twin bed I had in High School. I change her diapers as she did for me. Not as either of us planned, but actually a good option with Covid.