{"id":16227,"date":"2017-12-11T16:25:10","date_gmt":"2017-12-12T00:25:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pbs.org\/independentlens\/?post_type=blog&p=16227"},"modified":"2023-08-28T16:54:02","modified_gmt":"2023-08-28T23:54:02","slug":"on-supergirls-sasha-fierce-slim-shady-and-having-an-alter-ego","status":"publish","type":"blog","link":"https:\/\/www.pbs.org\/independentlens\/blog\/on-supergirls-sasha-fierce-slim-shady-and-having-an-alter-ego\/","title":{"rendered":"On Supergirls, Sasha Fierce, Slim Shady and Having an Alter Ego"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Michelle\u00a0Konstantinovsky<\/h4>\n
\n

Naomi Kutin<\/strong> is technically the central subject of the new Independent Lens<\/em> documentary\u00a0Supergirl<\/u><\/em><\/a>. But as the film unfolds, viewers learn fairly quickly that\u00a0there are actually two equally important protagonists: Kutin and her all-powerful alter ego, “Supergirl.”<\/p>\n

At first glance, the story might seem specific to Kutin, but the New Jersey pre-teen is representative of men and women, adults and children, all over, who have an alter ego of some sort.<\/p>\n

For instance, San Francisco yoga teacher Gillian Confair wasn\u2019t always Gillian Confair. Sure, that\u2019s the name printed on her birth certificate, but for a few years in the early 2000s, Confair lived a double life.<\/p>\n

\u201cI had a complete alter ego all throughout high school,\u201d says the San Francisco-based yoga instructor. \u201cI was a giant dork in high school and I didn\u2019t get along with other kids and didn\u2019t fit in. I found this fandom community for a random TV show that I absolutely loved called Farscape<\/em><\/a>.\u201d Soon, Confair was posting on Farscape<\/em> message boards, dialing into weekly group calls, and attending conventions \u2014 but not before reinventing herself.<\/p>\n

“When I first signed up for the message boards, I had to decide on a username; I\u2019d spent years correcting people on my name and not liking my name, and so I came up with Talia,” she says. “That became the very cool version of me that I could use in this big, geeky group of people \u2014 there are still people out there who call me Tal.”<\/p>\n

Confair\u2019s not alone, of course. Perhaps you\u2019ve heard of Sasha Fierce (a.k.a. Beyonc\u00e9)? \u201cI have someone else that takes over when it\u2019s time for me to work and when I\u2018m on stage, this alter ego that I\u2019ve created that kind of protects me and who I really am.\u201d Queen B once said in a statement. \u201cSasha Fierce is the fun, more sensual, more aggressive, more outspoken side and more glamorous side that comes out when I\u2018m working and when I\u2018m on the stage.\u201d<\/p>\n\n

Other artists have toyed with alternate identities too: Christina Aguilera\u2019s Dirrty<\/em>-era was defined by the chaps-wearing Xtina, Garth Brooks released an album as Chris Gaines, and Eminem famously declared himself “Slim Shady.” But alter egos aren\u2019t just reserved for the rich and famous. Case in point: Kutin, the nine-year-old powerlifter,\u00a0is a shy, self-declared awkward pre-teen raised in an Orthodox Jewish family, but when she starts dabbling in the sport of powerlifting, she finds her talent knows no bounds when channeled through the filter of \u201cSupergirl.\u201d<\/p>\n

“Adopting alter egos is a popular form of imaginative play for children,” says San Francisco psychologist Juli Fraga<\/strong>. “Also called ‘pretend play,’ kids often imagine they’re dragons, stormtroopers, or princesses.\u201d<\/p>\n

In Kutin\u2019s case, adopting the identity of Supergirl allows her psychologically (and physically) to perform seemingly impossible feats \u2014 like lifting more than twice her weight. \u201cWhen I\u2019m lifting, I\u2019m a very different person than when I\u2019m just living life normally,\u201d she says. \u201cWhen I put on my workout gear, then I just become Supergirl.\u201d<\/p>\n

“When adults adopt these ‘alter-egos,’ they may be able to access other parts of the self that allow them to complete difficult tasks, like running a marathon, lifting weights, or handling a difficult conflict,” Fraga explains. “Recent research shows talking to one’s self in the third-person can distill negative emotions and \u2018alter-egos\u2019 may provide this same type of interpersonal distance.”<\/p>\n

She adds, “Perhaps one feels conflicted or insecure about their behavior but if they believe \u2018someone else\u2019 is in charge, they feel less ashamed and perhaps more empowered to engage in the chosen act (i.e. powerlifting, competing in extreme sports).”<\/p>\n

Alyssa Mass, a Los Angeles-based psychotherapist, says Kutin\u2019s alter ego is just one element that makes her powerlifting success possible. \u201cWhat stands out to me, and feels so touching, is that her father and brother are powerlifters and that her mother says girls in Orthodoxy don’t partake in sports,\u201d Mass says. \u201cWhat I see is a young girl who saw her father and brother doing something and had a desire to join them, combined with supportive parents who allowed for that desire and joining to happen. It’s a beautiful thing to watch parents support a child’s curiosity and passion, despite it not necessarily aligning with their way of life.\u201d<\/p>\n\n

Just as the support of Kutin\u2019s family empowered her to live vicariously through “Supergirl,” Confair\u2019s newfound group of fellow Farscape<\/em> fans allowed her to access aspects of her personality she\u2019d kept hidden. \u201cI lived in a small town where everyone grew up together \u2014 a couple of people I knew since I was five \u2014 so there was no escaping Gillian,” she says. “Gillian was laughed at and bullied \u2014 but when I\u00a0was Talia, nobody knew that person; the slate was completely wiped clean, I was free to be as loud and quippy as I wanted, as weird and obscure and funny as I wanted in a group of people who got all my references and didn\u2019t call me ‘weird’ like I\u2019d been called all throughout school. I was bolder, full-on confident in myself in a way I don\u2019t think I\u2019d ever let myself be. It was like a dream.”“One of the best compliments I\u2019ve gotten from different people is that I dress like a superhero. And I say, \u2018yeah \u2014 dress for the job you want.”<\/pullquote><\/p>\n

Confair\u2019s secondary life as Talia continued until she left home for college and found the fresh start she was looking for. \u201cI didn\u2019t have to be two separate people; I could just be me,\u201d she says. \u201cBut there was something freeing in creating a persona from scratch with people who\u2019d never seen me or met me or had a preconceived notion of who I was. I was this funny, sharp, cool kid, and if they believed that was me, then it was<\/em> me.<\/p>\n

While Confair no longer channels Talia, she did tap into the power of another alter ego when deciding to become a full-time yoga teacher. \u201cIt was a huge leap for me,\u201d she says. \u201cI created my website, and I still have this name to this day: The Average Yogi<\/a>. It\u2019s what I represented, it was my mission statement.\u201d The tagline on Confair\u2019s homepage reads, “Find the Extraordinary Within<\/strong>,” and it seems Talia helped her in this self-discovery. “Being able to be Talia for four years or more while being that cool version of myself in a space where there was cachet to being a geek and being the giant nerd that I am,\u201d she says. “It empowered me to realize that part of myself wasn\u2019t a part to keep hidden, but to be celebrated and carried with me and I live in that way now.\u201d<\/p>\n\"Supergirl:\n

In Kutin and Confair\u2019s cases, their alter egos have provided positive results. But can an alter ego ever lead to trouble? \u201cAlter ego adoption can be harmful if it blurs the line between fantasy and reality,\u201d Fraga says. “Just as a child may blame spilled milk on an imaginary friend, adults who can’t take responsibility and chalk up all their success\u00a0or troubles to their ‘alter-egos’ may have interpersonal difficulties that aren’t being addressed.”<\/p>\n

In Mass\u2019s experience, however, the positive aspects of alter egos typically outweigh the negatives. \u201cWhether a client develops an alter ego to cope with trauma or a businessman develops an alter ego to tap into a well of confidence before a big meeting, examples of this abound throughout our society and culture,\u201d Mass says.<\/p>\n

\u201cReal-life examples include Beyonc\u00e9\/Sasha Fierce or the Real Housewives\u2019<\/em> Erika Girardi\/Erika Jayne, as well as fictional examples like Superman\/Clark Kent or Jem\/Jerrica [see gif below] \u2014 sometimes we want to express and explore ourselves more than our community may comfortably allow. Clinically speaking, in these cases, I would help my client to understand why and when this alter ego exists. What does it help them with? Does it hurt anything or get in the way of anything? While these answers will probably change over time and within different circumstances, if the answer to the latter is no…it ain’t broke so, don’t fix it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Confair doesn\u2019t believe her situation needs fixing at all. “One of the best compliments I\u2019ve gotten from different people is that I dress like a superhero,\u201d she says. “And every time I say, \u2018yeah \u2014 dress for the job you want.\u2019”<\/p>\n\n

\n

Michelle Konstantinovsky<\/strong> is a San Francisco-based freelance journalist\/marketing specialist\/ghostwriter\u00a0and\u00a0UC Berkeley Graduate School of Journalism\u00a0<\/em>alumna. She\u2019s written extensively on health, body image, entertainment, lifestyle, design, and tech for outlets like\u00a0Cosmopolitan,\u00a0Marie Claire,\u00a0Teen Vogue,\u00a0O: The Oprah Magazine,\u00a0Seventeen,\u00a0Slate,\u00a0SPIN,\u00a0Entrepreneur,\u00a0xoJane,\u00a0SF Weekly,\u00a07\u00d77 Magazine,\u00a0The Huffington Post,\u00a0HelloGiggles,\u00a0WebMD, and a whole lot more. She\u2019s also a contributing editor and social media director at\u00a0California Home + Design. She is an avid admirer of shiny objects and preteen entertainment.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Michelle\u00a0Konstantinovsky Naomi Kutin is technically the central subject of the new Independent Lens documentary\u00a0Supergirl. 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