Dorothy speaks about hearing the news that Terrell had been shot: "Deep down inside, I knew- I knew- Terrell was gone."

The Collins family hurt deeply after losing Terrell because they had such a deep bond of connection and belonging. The connection is so strong that his grandmother could almost feel his pain in his last minutes of life. The news about Terrell's death was devastating. None of the members of the Collins family could believe what had happened. Terrell, after all, had been their "miracle baby"- kidnapped, abandoned and found again- returned to the loving arms of his grandmother. In some ways, Terrell had carried all of the hopes of the family. He had been "the one." Now he was gone, struck down before he had a chance to discover all of his talents.

Although the entire family was overwhelmed by the loss, Terrell's brother Jack seemed most affected by it. Jack had been with Terrell when he was shot. He tried to keep his brother alive and voiced feelings of guilt and regret that he hadn't been able to save Terrell. Jack's response to the trauma of seeing his brother die, coupled with the violence of living in a community that lacked many of the fundamental requirements for nurturing or fostering human life led him to withdraw and numb himself through substance abuse. The various social, economic, political and cultural realities, and upheavals in the lives of the family, were severe. It seems consistent to expect that most people in similar situations would have negative and displaced responses, like Jack.

Understanding Trauma: Current & Chronic Reactions

Psychological research defines four stages of loss, as shown in these incidences in the documentary:

Shock/Denial- expressions of "no no no" (and sobbing) by family members.
Anger- "In the news, Terrell's killing was just another story" -Nickcole speaking about the news report.
Sadness/Hurt- "How can I fill the space in my heart?" - Dorothy, expressing her pain.
Acceptance/Understanding- "Happy Birthday, Terrell" - the family at the gravesite. (See also the discussion on trauma in the Youth Development section.)

Traumatic events often create emotional and psychological challenges for survivors. The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) says that emotional injuries are essentially a normal response to an extreme event, and the more direct exposure to the traumatic event, the higher the risk for emotional harm. However, even second-hand exposure to violence can be traumatic. For this reason, the NIMH recommends that all children and adolescents exposed to violence or disaster, even if only through graphic media reports, should be watched for signs of emotional distress.

For adolescents and adults, signs may include: flashbacks, nightmares, emotional numbing, avoidance of reminders of the event, depression, substance abuse, problems with peers and anti-social behavior, withdrawal and isolation, sleep disturbances and physical complaints.

It is important to keep in mind three principles of crisis intervention- immediacy, proximity and expectancy. Immediacy emphasizes early awareness and detection by others close to the person, treatment as quickly as possible, and an emphasis on returning the client to their familiar life situation as soon as possible. Proximity emphasizes the need to treat clients in their own worlds- not distancing them from the environment. Lastly, it's important to communicate a clear expectancy that although fear and anxiety are normal processes, they do not excuse one from functioning adequately. The wounded role is not reinforced, and there is an emphasis on experiences that demonstrate that they are regaining the capacity to manage their lives.

Discussion Questions

Imagine that your child, full of unbridled potential, is accidentally killed. Now, suppose, it was murder. Describe the range of your emotions and actions. Would you be shocked? Angry? Depressed? Would you ever accept it?
How long do you think it would take you and your family to move on after such a traumatic event? What resources did the family rely on to incorporate Terrell's death into their family's saga and continue to move on?
Non-African Americans were in charge of many of the resources that the family relied upon. How might needing to rely on whites for help affect this family's sense of integrity and functionality?
Given the realities of their living situation, discuss the cumulative impact of Terrell's death on the Collins family. How did this affect them? Who could have reached out and supported the family?
Several of the family members said they kept their grief and stress inside. What effect might holding stress inside have on the functioning of these family members? What strategies can be helpful in accessing these emotional reactions?
The Collins family was shown visiting the gravesite to celebrate Terrell's birthday and to commemorate other important passages in the family. What is your opinion of this process as a coping strategy? How important is this process to maintaining the family's strength?
How well did the Collins family appear to demonstrate effective crisis management?
What other resources might have helped the family?
How might youth groups assist their members in managing current trauma and chronic trauma?

Resources

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, (202) 966-7300
National Center for Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, (802) 296 5132
National Institute of Mental Health, (301) 443-4513
National Mental Health Association, (703) 684-7722