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American Love Stories

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The following Featured Post comes from TV Series Group 1, Thread 1.

1. American Lovestories reactions
Mon, Sep 13, 1999 - 5:01 PM/EST
iris

Watching the first night of the series last night was an emotional experience for me, as so much of it mirrors my own life. The professional mother and musician father - being told you are "black" according to America's rules, but finding social acceptance with (for the most part) every ethnicity EXCEPT blacks. I am the same age as Cecily, and also found college to be something of a shock. As a bi-racial person who had snubbed her father's advice to go to a "Black" school, (because I thouhgt it woulod be too limiting), I did however, think that I would decide to pledge a black sorority - but when I went to the informational meetings, I found my fellow students (not sorority members) recommending: "You should join so-and-so sorority - because you're so light".

Needless to say, I did not pledge any sorority. I did join the marching band, which , to my knowledge, was, and remains, the most diverse student organization at the school. One other student, whom I had become friends with, and happened to be considerably darker-skinned than I am, felt comfortable enough with me to confide "You know, at first I didn't think you would want to be friends with me. " I was surprised and asked her why she thought that. Her response? "Because you're so light." I decided that if I was to be judged based on my skin color, why limit myself to just the black community? I may as well continue to live life as I always had (prior to college), talking to whomever I pleased, dating whoever I pleased. I ignored the obvious, but unwritten social system of self-segregation, and made friends of all different backgrounds.

Watching the show is interesting, since my family and the Wilson-Sims have various struggles in common. I look at the way they handled certain things, and the way my family did. Many segments are so painful I have to leave the room.

2. Re: American Lovestories reactions
Mon, Sep 13, 1999 - 5:48 PM/EST
thaduke

Damn. What you posted of your college life is powerful stuff indeed. I often dwell on what my girls will face when they're school age. We've already had the race-pigeonholing episodes. A hispanic man in a restaurant was staring and smiling at our middle one (at the time, two), asking my wife "is she mexican?" My wife answered no. When I returned to the table, he put two and two together, and turned away with a look on his face like he'd just been served a plateful of sour owl crap instead of his Denver Omelette. For the most part, though, we've had people with whom we associate and meet treat us as close to what I can describe as normal. If they're hiding their displeasure, they're doing a good job.

My thing is, if you don't like me...FINE. I can live with that (at one time in my life, it wasn't that way). As long as you treat me with common human decency and respect, you dont HAVE to like me. Would be nice if you did, strange that you don't, but not necessary for me to live my life. Just don't take it out on my family or kids.

I hope that my girls have the same atttitude that you and I seem to have...to live despite others analysis.

tha' Duke

3. Prejudism
Mon, Sep 13, 1999 - 7:18 PM/EST
davidt10

I have been raised in a prejudiced inviroment all my life and grew up thinking that black people were not human. This show has given me some new insites. I see now that black people are just people trying to survive and make a living like the rest of us. I do not think that people of different races should marry though since they are not the ones who have to put up with the prejudices of other people. Their children are the ones who will have to deal with it. There are also things in the Bible that make me think this way too such as the part about all the people gathering in one place when God told them to scatter through the earth and replenish it. They all stayed in one place and spoke one language. God made them where they couldn't understand each other's language so they would spread out and go their own ways.

4. David, I hear you, but...
Mon, Sep 13, 1999 - 8:06 PM/EST
thaduke

First of all, I want to commend you for venturing out of your comfort zone, and trying to understand that we're just slogging along in life, just like you, trying to do the best we can.

Secondly, just like kids one hundred years ago didn't have to deal with abortion on demand, AIDS, the nuclear bomb, and other modern scourges, doesn't mean that todays kids can't deal with prejudice. We've been dealing with it ever since one people recognized that another people were different. Life's tough: that doesn't mean that we should not get together interracially because we're afraid of how the kids will handle it. If you raise your kids in a centered, moral, strong way, while the slings and arrows may wound (as they do to ALL kids, just in areas that don't include interrace prejudice), they won't kill, and they'll be stronger in the long run.

As for the biblical aspects, I won't go into it too deeply, as this probably isn't the main focus of the forum. However (1) I (and you might agree) that Jesus came to end the law (the old codes and ways of doing things), not make more of it, and (2) if we're brothers and sister, can we truly uphold the Great Commission of loving one another when we say, "I love you...really...I do...just don't marry my people." ?

Not attacking you, David. I want to hear more about your upbringing. I think you bring some really deep experiences to the table that we can benefit from.

tha' duke

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