Julie and I initially met in Massachusetts during a five-month interim period between seven months that I had spent in Russia and fifteen months that I have spent in California. Both times I had served as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons). She was not a Mormon when we met. I was 20, she was 19.

We became friends. Julie, then an atheist, asked me about my beliefs in God. To this day, she still giggles as to how I sounded. However, this was the beginning of a long and slow discussion of beliefs that culminated in her receiving Mormon missionaries into her own home in Wisconsin. Soon after, she was baptized into the Mormon Church.

We began dating, and we both returned to college--I went to Idaho, while she stayed in Massachusetts. We wrote nearly 20,000 e-mails to each other during the next year--I still have them on disk (much to Julie's dismay). I returned to Massachusetts, we dated for a couple of months and were engaged and then married on August 22, 1998 in Washington, D.C. We are expecting a baby around October 20, 1999. I am 23, she is 22.

Julie was the only member of her family that joined the Mormon Church. Our decision to get married in a Mormon temple created an awkward situation for everyone involved. Mormon temples can only be entered by church members in good standing, since they are considered sacred. Therefore, Julie's family would not be able to see the ceremony.

There were definitely some very understandable grumblings from members of Julie's family. After all, Julie is the only daughter in her family. Still, her parents tried to be supportive, and they made the trek from Wisconsin to Washington, D.C.

My family and I cared about how Julie's parents would feel. My mother especially was determined to make the event as pleasant as possible for Julie's family, despite the odds.

When the marriage actually happened, I suppose it went as well as could have been expected. Personally, I did feel a sort of suspense afterwards. I wondered what her parents were thinking and if they were actually happy at any degree.

Despite the awkwardness of that day, the relationship between my in-laws and me has grown. I remember shaking in my boots when I asked Julie's father for her hand in marriage, and I don't shake half as much now as I did then when I talk to him. I figure that this is mainly due to attempts on either side to make it work.

We have traveled to Wisconsin as often as possible. They have tried hard to accept me and my different religious views. My mother drops Julie's mother a line every now and then. Since we have become pregnant, I think their surprising eager anticipation of becoming grandparents has helped them to find out more about me and even their own daughter.

Overall, things have turned out positively. From my perspective, there have been two things that have assisted in making my relationship with my in-laws in becoming successful. One has been our working around our different ideals through establishing bonds through common interests. The other, probably more important, is the healthy dose of understanding and tolerance on Julie's parents' part.