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You're not a sweet, dear old thing-but you're still a grandparent and you love your grandkids. You want to be a fantastic grandparent. But it's not as easy as advertised.

Maybe you think those grand kids are spoiled. Maybe your own kids are making all kinds of parenting mistakes, but they don't want to hear any advice-especially from you. Or maybe you think you're just too young and cool to be a grandparent.

These are just some of the challenges facing the Woodstock Generation as they assume a new role-grandparent. And Robert Lipsyte's panel has some pretty great advice to help ease the transition. There's Allan Zullo, author of The Boomer's Guide to Grandparenting, therapist Iris Cornelius whose practice focuses on intergenerational issues in families; and therapist Joshua Coleman, author of When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies for When You and Your Grown Children Don't Get Along.

According to the panel, Boomers are often wealthier, better educated, and younger looking, than their own grandparents. "My kids dress like I do, and they listen to same music," says Coleman. Their advice? Be cautious: don't give advice that's not asked for. If you want to open up a dialogue, start admitting your own mistakes as a parent.

Next Lipsyte sits down with a leading advocate of compassionate and reasoned elder care. Dartmouth geriatrician Dennis McCullough, author of My Mother, Your Mother: Embracing Slow Medicine, the Compassionate Approach to Caring for Your Aging Loved Ones, provides practical tips on how to transform late life health care to a more humane experience. It's a conversation that no Boomer with an aging parent should miss.

Finally, Juan Williams of Fox News and National Public Radio, author of the best-seller, Eyes on the Prize, contemplates the nagging question: Am I middle-aged or just plain old?


A grand mother and A Mom to 40 years adult son

Dear Dr, Coleman

I have been a loving and wonderful mother for all my son 's life. I sacrificed my whole life and was totally devoted to my son who was loved and admired by everyone. After my husband passed away 5 and half years ago he made 300o turn and estranged himself. I have never been able to have a straight conversation or an intelligent response to why. He has avoided being alone with me so I won't bring any personal question. I don't wish anyone tyo go thru the pains, hurt and crying everyday.
My motif to write is the cause of estrangement you mentioned, The children want to bring up their children and give them different education. I don't agree, in my case. my son is trying to bting up his son like h e received.
I am puzzled, I have no answer to my son actions. It is difficult to do anything that I didn't try as I leave 3500 miles away
It is a tragic and sad situation.
Thank you.

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