How ‘chatty benches’ are building connections and combating loneliness in Britain

Geoff Bennett:

Mental health experts are convinced that one of the long-term consequences of lockdowns during the COVID pandemic is an increase in loneliness.

In Britain, communities are trying to combat people's isolation by introducing so-called chatty benches and chatty cafes.

Special correspondent Malcolm Brabant reports from Kent.

Malcolm Brabant:

This bench overlooking the North Sea has a poignant backstory. If you sit down here, you're inviting a conversation, or perhaps making a cry for help.

Rachael Stone, Chatty Bench Donor:

My husband took his own life in 2019.

Malcolm Brabant:

Rachael Stone is Ben's widow.

Rachael Stone:

And, at the time, there was so many young men in the area, one after the other who were struggling who had taken their own lives. And I wanted to do something to help, because you feel a bit helpless in a situation like that.

Malcolm Brabant:

While left to raise two small daughters and her older stepson, Rachael strove to create a legacy for her husband, who was overwhelmed by depression. Just in case no one stops to chat, there's a discreet reminder of a suicide hot line.

Rachael Stone:

If you're feeling desperate and you have got somewhere like this, come and sit tight. It just takes that one person to stop and just say, are you OK? And if he genuinely had something like this, and it could have delayed him taking his own life on that day.

Malcolm Brabant:

Twenty miles to the south are sheer drops, where, over the years, several people have leapt to their deaths. The cliffs no longer have such a grim reputation, thanks in part to a neighborhood regeneration scheme, including the benches.

I have come to Ramsgate, a seaside town some 80 miles southeast of London. This is a chatty bench. It's a glorious sunny day, a real change from the miserable winter that Britain's having. People are out and about. Let's see if anybody wants to talk.

The sad truth is, I was studiously ignored, until David Barber turned up. He's one of the community leaders behind this chatty bench project.

David Barber, Winterstoke Gardens Project:

Life is pretty — it's pretty dark, isn't it? It's not exactly a happy place at the moment, the world. And so loneliness spreads, I think.

Malcolm Brabant:

Exacerbated, Barber says, by an Internet full of remote opinions that people post, but rarely share in person face-to-face.

David Barber:

Technology hasn't helped. People walk along with their phones. They have got earphones in. They don't want to converse. They don't want to have even eye contact. So the art of conversation is an awful lot less than it used to be.

Lorraine Hudson, Aspirant Artist:

I don't want fame.

Gareth Cox, Caregiver:

No. If you're good at your art or whatever it is, you have got to let the people see you.

Lorraine Hudson:

I'd like the money.

David Barber:

Yes.

Lorraine Hudson:

But I don't want fame.

Malcolm Brabant:

Among those who frequent this bench are Lorraine Hudson and Gareth Cox, who come to shoot the breeze.

Gareth Cox:

I think community spirit has died. There was a time 20, 30 years back neighbors spoke to each other far more. It doesn't happen now.

Partly, I think, is the Internet. People have all of their needs in the house, so they don't need to go out and communicate. They don't really go to pubs as much. And that's just isolated everybody. And it's become the norm, which is — it's sad, but we all do it.

Lorraine Hudson:

Yes. No, I agree. Yes. Everyone's on their phones. They're on the computer, busy working. So it's nice to have places like this where you can sit down, just chill.

Malcolm Brabant:

Given Britain's inclement climate, the boom in chatty cafes is outpacing chatty benches. Besides conviviality, Whitstable's Revival cafe offers a low-key mental health safety net.

Deborah Haylett, Revival:

I think it is a worrying trend in terms of, we know the impact of loneliness and isolation isn't good for people's mental health.

Malcolm Brabant:

Deborah Haylett runs the Revival, which Mind, the mental health nonprofit, established as an innovative social enterprise.

Deborah Haylett:

We are social animals. That's what we are here for. We are part of families. Part of villages, part of tribes. That's who we are. Research shows that social interaction is one of the main ways that you can support your well-being.

Frances Burtensaw, Chatty Cafe Client:

I might have an omelet.

Woman:

Yes.

Malcolm Brabant:

Frances Burtensaw is a regular at the chatty Tuesday sessions.

Frances Burtensaw:

If you sit indoors and you don't talk to anyone or you're on your own, you go bonkers.

Malcolm Brabant:

Recent surveys conducted since the COVID pandemic show a consistent rise in loneliness. Overall, one in three Britons feels lonely. But the surprising thing is that people who are suffering most are young people.

A survey conducted in 2023 revealed that amongst those aged between 18 to 24, three out of every five felt alone and isolated.

Deborah Haylett:

I think that that particularly is to do with COVID. I think they had a lot of disruption in school. They stopped going to after-school clubs. They stopped going seeing their friends outside of school, and it became all of their education was on screens. Their interaction with friends was on screens.

And it's naturally just progressed that they carried on in that way, that they have become used to those patterns.

Malcolm Brabant:

Back along the North Kent coast, Rachael Stone decorates her bench with the international symbol for mental health awareness.

Rachael Stone:

Particularly coming up to Christmas, I think people suffer even more. So it's heightened, isn't it, because you think everyone around you is having such a lovely time, social media influences.

Having somebody to speak to and just off-load is so important, because bottling everything up, it's one of the worst things you can do, because you're just alone with your thoughts.

Malcolm Brabant:

Rachael's message is simple: Don't walk on by. You might make a small difference. You might even save a life.

For the "PBS NewsHour," I'm Malcolm Brabant in Kent.