Setting Technology Ground Rules with Your Child

For most of us, we live and breathe technology. We text, tweet, shop, learn, work, read the news, play games and plan vacations online. Our kids are following our example by getting devices and going online at younger and younger ages.

According to a recent survey commissioned by LifeLock, Inc., technology access starts as early as 6 years old in many families. At this age, 74 percent of children have access to laptops/desktops. The survey also revealed that 30 percent of 9-year-olds have a smartphone, and by the time kids hit their mid-teens, 80 percent have a phone.

Research also shows that 92 percent of teens go online daily and nearly three-quarters of children age 0-8 use apps.

Technology has opened up a world of opportunities in every aspect of life and is essential for the development of skills children need to thrive. As parents, we want our children to learn and have fun through technology, and at the same time, stay safe and develop healthy lifestyles.

And as we want to teach our kids to practice good behavior, it is important that we talk to them about how to live safely in an increasingly digital world and show them that the rules of life also apply online.

This week has been designated Digital Citizenship Week—a perfect time for families to start a conversation about digital safety and responsibility and establish ground rules together for the use of devices.

To help bring families like yours and mine together for productive conversations about online behavior and to set ground rules around technology, the National PTA and LifeLock have launched a new, free digital tool called The Smart Talk.

Find 20 minutes to invest in your family’s online well-being by creating a personalized family plan to guide your technology use. The Smart Talk provides an interactive experience that walks kids and parents through a series of questions and conversations about topics such as safety and privacy, screen time, social media, reputation and respect. After agreeing on healthy limits together, a personalized, official family agreement can be stored on the computer or printed and posted at home. We call it “fridge-worthy.”

The Smart Talk can not only help families formalize rules, but also identify check-in points down the road to update those rules.

For parents with younger children, the question may be, “When should my child get their first device?” Your child may have put a device at the top of their wish list for the holidays. Or, like me, you may have discovered after your latest device upgrade that you have one to pass on to your kids. There is no one-size-fits-all answer for every family. You know your child well, so before you make the decision to gift your child with their first device, ask these questions:

• Does your child show a sense of responsibility, such as letting you know when they leave the house? Do they show up when they say they will?
• Does your child tend to lose things, such as backpacks or homework folders?
• Does your child need to be able to contact you at any time for safety reasons?
• Would having easy access to friends benefit your child for social reasons?
• Do you think your child will use cell phones responsibly—for example, not texting during class or disturbing others with their phone conversations?
• Can your child adhere to limits you set for minutes talked and apps downloaded?
• Will your child use text, photo and video functions responsibly and not to embarrass or harass others?

The answers to the questions will help you assess your child’s level of responsibility. At the same time, be honest with yourself. How ready are you to add another important responsibility to your plate—routinely monitoring device use to ensure your family agreement is being followed?

Digital Citizenship Week is also a chance to review your personal example in teaching your family good digital habits, like not bringing the phone to the dinner table, never driving and texting or turning off all devices and storing them in a common area well before bedtime. For more information, and to begin the conversation and develop a family technology agreement, visit TheSmartTalk.org and “like” #TheSmartTalk on Facebook.