- [Narrator] Coming up on "American Songbook at NJPAC," Britain's Jim Dale rules the stage.

♪ But the colors of my life ♪ ♪ Are bountiful and bold ♪ - [Narrator] With tales from the music halls of England.

♪ Brought a telegram that read ♪ ♪ He didn't want to wed ♪ ♪ And that they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ With his toes turned up yes ♪ - [Narrator] To Broadway's Great White Way.

♪ You'll find us all ♪ ♪ Doin' the Lambeth walk ♪ - [Narrator] And Hollywood's silver screen.

♪ I said hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ Swingin' down the street so fancy-free ♪ - [Narrator] "The American Songbook Series at NJPAC" is presented through the generous support of the Blanche and Irving Laurie Foundation, the David S. Steiner and Sylvia Steiner Charitable Trust, the Joan and Allen Bildner Family Fund, and the Smart Family Foundation, David S. Stone Esquire, Stone & Magnanini, and now, from the Lizzie & Jonathan Tisch Stage at NJPAC's Victoria Theater in Newark, New Jersey, your host, Ted Chapin.

[audience applauding] - Depending on how old you are, you know this man from all seven audio books of the Harry Potter stories, or you saw his Tony-award winning performance as Barnum, or you hummed along to a title song you didn't realize he wrote for a very popular movie in the 1960s.

He will explain all of that to you and more.

Ladies and gentlemen, the remarkable Jim Dale.

[audience applauding] [piano music] - Thank you very much.

It was an evening last November that I always shall remember.

I was staggering down the lane in drunken stride when my knees began to stutter.

So I lay down in the gutter and the pig came up and laid down by my side.

[Jim chuckling] Yes, it joined me in that gutter.

We lay close as bread and butter, and then a lady passing by was heard to say, you can tell a man who boozes by the company he chooses, [audience laughing] and the pig got up and slowly walked away.

[audience laughing] That's good.

[audience applauding] So.

[jaunty piano music] So take a look at me.

[Jim chuckling] Go on, a good look at me, 'cause some years ago, I didn't know me elbow from me ass, just simply anyone.

No, go on, ask anyone and they'll tell you ♪ I was greener than the grass ♪ ♪ Nobody to wake me up ♪ ♪ There was nobody to shake me up ♪ Until my dad said, there's a show I'll take you to.

I was only about this tall.

He took me to music hall and, and I heard those laughs and I sussed out what to do, and I said to myself.

♪ I gotta be me find out who I am ♪ ♪ Discover me talent as a comedy man ♪ ♪ I could go in for ballet 'cause I've never been fat ♪ ♪ But then I'd have learned to fight for dressing in tights ♪ ♪ 'Cause you need balls for that ♪ ♪ Come on opera Three Tenors and me ♪ ♪ A "Carry On" film star'd be my cup of tea ♪ ♪ Then I could play a claim ♪ ♪ In the hall of fame for acting dim ♪ ♪ Be a hosted toasted roasted lucky ♪ ♪ So take a look at me ♪ ♪ Go on a quick butcher's look at me ♪ ♪ 'Cause some years ago ♪ ♪ I didn't know me Shakespeare for me Wilde ♪ Can you imagine it, just imagine it?

An actor, fancy not knowing his Shakespeare from his Wilde.

Yeah, well, one is a sort of playwright and the other sort of.

- Writes plays!

- He writes plays, yeah.

♪ Oh what a dream I had ♪ ♪ A beautiful dream I had ♪ ♪ It was a film called "Georgy Girl" ♪ ♪ I'd written a song and some people applauded it ♪ ♪ Then the teachers recorded it ♪ ♪ And it pitched me to that niche where I belong ♪ ♪ So I gotta be me ♪ ♪ Well you know I've said it before ♪ ♪ A juiciful actor for folks to adore ♪ ♪ Well imagine that Oscar ♪ ♪ What a treasure to win ♪ ♪ When Sir Michael Caine calls out me name and yells ♪ ♪ It's Lucky Jim ♪ Did you know that Michael Caine, he only speaks in three words at one time?

[audience laughing] I was born in east London.

Not many people know about that.

On and on, up and down, down and up.

♪ But maybe the best thing I can ever achieve ♪ ♪ Is to be on a small stage ♪ ♪ That's all that I need ♪ ♪ 'Cause with folks like you ♪ ♪ Mark York too ♪ ♪ It's win win win ♪ ♪ I'd be your hosted toasted roasted limey ♪ ♪ Google Jim there you'll find me ♪ ♪ Leading man or dirty botter ♪ ♪ Haunted by Harry Potter ♪ ♪ Hosted toasted roasted lucky Jim ♪ ♪ I'm gonna be him yep ♪ ♪ I'm gonna be hosted toasted roasted lucky Jim yeah ♪ [audience applauding] [audience cheering] [Mark laughing] Thank you.

Thank you, thank you.

All right, all right.

One encore then I must go.

[audience laughing] All right, little bit of Dale history.

My mother said the first sound I must have heard in this world was laughter.

Not from me, she said, from the three nurses standing around the bed, watching.

She said, no, Jim, they weren't laughing at you, love.

It was me.

I'd been in labor for 18 hours.

When I finally popped you out, I had just enough breath left to yell, tada!

[audience laughing] And that's how young Jim Smith came into this world.

Yes, Smith, that was the name I was lumbered with.

My mother, she had six sisters, three brothers.

I had dozens of cousins.

In fact, we took up most of that little town and that town in those days was just a dot on the map.

Rothwell, the dead center of England.

Dead in every way, yeah.

My mother, well, my father, I should say, he worked in a steel foundry in the local town, and my lovely mum, like all other lovely mums in the town, she worked in one of the local shoe factories, but there must have been some sort of showbiz DNA in our family.

My grandmother, for instance, she ran a theatrical boarding house in the neighboring town next to the old music hall, and Dad actually worked there when he was seven years old.

He was a call boy, do you remember those?

Knocking on the dressing room door shouting, curtain up, 10 minutes, Nick is on, thank you, and somewhere along the line, he taught himself to play the piano.

The story goes that he's about this big.

He saw a piano for the first time.

He ran over to it, he sat down at it, and he just started to play it.

My grandmother said he was just terrible, [audience laughing] and he never did get any better, but because of him, the whole crowd used to gather at our house for good old Saturday night sing along, and the songs that we sang along to in those days were from British music hall.

Now many of you may not know just how much music hall meant to us working class Brits.

The upper class, they had their opera, their ballet, their Gilbert and Sullivan, but for us hoi polloi, it was music hall and I loved it.

I loved everything about it, especially the old time comics.

Oh, I thought I, in fact, they were so funny.

I memorized their entire routines from one year to the next, actually from one century to the next.

That poem I said at the very beginning, the pig got up and slowly walked away, 150 years old.

Do you believe that?

And those antique show, the jokes, they still make us laugh today.

I mean it.

I'll prove it.

I said, wait, sir, what's this?

He said, it's bean soup.

I said, I don't care what it's been.

What is it now?

[audience laughing] And it was on one of these Saturday night singalongs that I found Dad's old battered bowler hat.

I put it on and his old tuxedo.

I rolled up the trouser legs and I walked into the center of our living room, dead center carpet.

Carpet?

Linoleum, and with dad at the piano and the pants falling down, I was music hall.

♪ Mary Ellen at the church turned up ♪ ♪ Her mother turned up and her dad turned up ♪ ♪ Her sister Gert and her rich uncle Bert ♪ ♪ And the parson in his long white shirt turned up ♪ ♪ But no bridegroom with the ring turned up ♪ ♪ But a telegraph boy with his nose ♪ ♪ Through a telegram that said he didn't want to wed ♪ ♪ And that they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ Yes they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ Yes they'd find him in the river with his toes turned up ♪ I was about that small when Dad said.

When I was about that tall he said, I'll take you now to see the real thing, and he took me to London to see a West End show, my very first.

It was called "Me and My Girl" and dad and I, we sat in the back of that second balcony, and we watched this brilliant comedian called Lupino Lane.

Bless his heart, he did a funny walk on the stage, down to the footlights, tripped over them, and disappeared into the orchestra pit, and that's when I heard it, 1,000 people suddenly screaming with laughter.

Now I'd only ever heard about 400 or 500 people screaming at a football game up until that moment, but then having heard that, the hairs went up on the back of my neck and I said, dad, dad, that's what I want to do.

Now dad could have said anything at that time, you know.

Are you bonkers could have been one of them, but he didn't.

At the back of that second balcony, dad, well, he gave me the best bit of advice any wannabe performer could get.

Dad said, learn how to move.

Now, how the hell did an iron foundry worker know that, but it's true, isn't it?

Movement, that's the secret of all theater.

So within two weeks I became the Billy Elliott of our small town.

[audience laughing] Oh God, the only boy in an all girls dancing school, all girls and only one dressing room.

[audience laughing] Oh, what an upstanding lad I was in those days, many times, [audience laughing] but because of all that training, almost 40 years later to the day I stepped onto a Broadway stage and a revival of that very same musical.

I did my funny walk down to the foot lights, didn't trip over them, instead started singing.

♪ Me and my girl meant for each other ♪ [audience applauding] ♪ Sent for each other and liking it so ♪ ♪ Me and my girl no use pretending ♪ ♪ We knew the ending a long time ago ♪ ♪ Some little church with a big steeple ♪ ♪ Just a few people that most of us know ♪ ♪ And we'll have love ♪ [Jim tap dancing] ♪ Laughter ♪ [Jim tap dancing] ♪ Be happy ever ♪ [Jim tap dancing] ♪ Me and my girl ♪ In a little town called.

♪ Lambeth you've never seen ♪ ♪ The skies ain't blue the grass ain't green ♪ ♪ It hasn't got the Mayfair touch ♪ ♪ But that don't matter very much ♪ ♪ 'Cause we play a different way ♪ ♪ Not like you but a bit more gay ♪ ♪ When we have a bit of fun ♪ ♪ Oh boy ♪ ♪ Oh anytime you're Lambeth way ♪ ♪ Any evening any day ♪ ♪ You'll find us all doin' the Lambeth walk ♪ ♪ Oi and every little Lambeth gal ♪ ♪ With her little Lambeth pal ♪ ♪ You'll find us all everybody ♪ ♪ Doing the Lambeth walk ♪ ♪ Everything's free and easy ♪ ♪ You do as you darn well pleasey ♪ ♪ So why don't you make your way there ♪ ♪ Go there stay there ♪ ♪ Once you get down Lambeth way ♪ ♪ Any evening any day there ♪ ♪ You'll find us all doin' the Lambeth ♪ ♪ Doing the Lambeth ♪ ♪ Doing the Lambeth walk oi ♪ [audience applauding] [Jim chuckling] And that, that was the world that I wanted to get into.

So for six years, no, it was eight years, I studied dancing, everything, you know, from tap, [Jim tap dancing] ballroom dancing, la di da da da da, eccentric comedy dancing, and even tumbling, you know, like that, [audience laughing] and of course the dreaded ballet, and I was about 11 years old when our school decided to enter the county ballet competition.

So for about eight weeks, I rehearsed a pas de deux with my 10 year old cousin, Ruth.

A pas de deux, you know, dance for two, except on the day of the competition, our Ruth never turned up.

[audience laughing] No, she and her mom, they were stuck 15 miles away.

They couldn't get there.

In the meantime, I'm dressed in, you can guess, silk shirt, black shoes, black tights, padded crotch, you know, only copying the big ballet boys, and I stood there in the wings waiting, waiting, waiting.

Finally, the judge came up, he said, sorry, son, you can't be in the competition.

She's not here, and I was so upset.

I said, oh, come on.

I know I can't be in the competition, but come Lord.

I I've been practicing this for eight weeks and it's not my fault my stupid cousin has missed the bus.

I should be able to go on, go, and he saw how wild and mad and upset I was.

So, you know, to avoid the local headlines, "Boy with Padded Crotch Strangles Cousin," [audience laughing] he decided to let me go on.

I remember him walking in front of the audience and explaining to them what had happened with Ruth and then saying, so ladies and gentlemen, here is Jimmy Smith dancing the pas de deux on his own.

[audience laughing] Now, where did I get the cheek to do what I did next?

I walked on stage, Nureyev Smith, walked on stage with an imaginary Ruth, [audience laughing] took up center position, gave the pianist the nod, and the pas de deux began.

[elegant music] First part of the dance, it was just Ruth on her own.

I wasn't doing a thing, [audience laughing] and then I came in with a couple of little bits.

Then I turned and gave Ruth a lift, [audience laughing] and that that's when I heard it, titters coming from all the mums sitting out front and I thought, all right, let's go along with it.

So on the second turn, Ruth went a little higher, and now the titters, they were turning into giggles.

I thought, right.

In for a penny, in for a pound.

On the last lift, I let Ruth go and she soared like a kite across the stage with me looking up at her.

Then I ran across the stage and waited and waited and caught her as she landed, [audience applauding] but I wasn't finished yet.

[audience laughing] I then took Ruth by the hand, walked to center stage.

Ruth took her bow.

I took my bow, and I picked her up, put her under my arm, gave the thumbs up and walked off like this.

[jaunty music] [audience applauding] We didn't win the competition, but young Jim Smith had got his first laugh.

You know, when you come from a small town, the chances of joining show businesses, it's very rare.

I mean, people like Vanessa Redgrave, Drew Barrymore, they're born into show business.

Other people like burglars, they break into it.

[audience laughing] I actually landed in it.

I was 17 and a half years of age, and I read in the newspaper that a show was touring the country and coming to our local town.

It was called "Carroll Levis Presents Britain's Greatest Talented Teenagers."

So they were holding auditions the following Monday.

So after six years of dance training, I naturally decided to audition as an impressionist.

Don't ask me why.

I had never done an impression in my life, but I quickly thought of three.

I thought, well, very good.

So there I was on Monday morning, standing in the wings with about 15 other wannabe stars, you know, waiting to go on and hearing the boss man himself in the audience, all on his own, calling out roughly every 30 seconds, thank you, next please.

So eventually, they called my name out and as I stepped onto the stage, my foot caught in a tear in the long red curtain and I fell flat on my face and it hurt, and it also got a big laugh from the boss man sitting in the audience.

So I stood up and dusted myself down, did a elongated limp to a big, big laugh again.

I thought, great, here we go.

Did my impressions, absolute silence.

I thought, oh, I had nothing to lose.

I'll do an impression of the boss man himself.

So I shouted out, thank you, next, please.

[audience chuckling] Only this time, the boss man didn't shout out, next please.

He said, young man, wait in the wings.

I thought, oh God, he's gonna charge me for the curtain.

[audience laughing] He didn't, he didn't.

He came back to stage afterwards.

He said, those impressions.

I said, yes.

He said, were terrible, and I remember saying, well, I thought they were very good.

I sounded just like those three people, and he said, well, maybe you did, but how the hell does an audience know what your mother's butcher sounds like, [audience laughing] or the local vicar, or your next door neighbor?

I said, well, I think that's funny, you know, an impressionist doing impressions of people you'd never heard of.

[Jim smug laughing] [audience laughing] He said no, no, no, no, but that fall that you did when you came on, son, that was funny.

I said, thank you.

Yes, I've been practicing.

He said, good, well practice some more.

Go home, get an act up where you fall over, about five minutes, four, five minutes.

Come back tonight, if you are back here by six o'clock, I'll put you on, sight unseen.

All right, it's now one o'clock.

Be back here at six.

I couldn't believe it.

I had a mere five hours to put together an act that you know, and you could change my life completely.

I remember running home.

I said, mom, look, I have no time to eat love.

I've got to put together a funny act.

I've got to find some jokes.

I've got to find a song, a funny song.

I've got to find a costume, a costume, and then I remembered dad's old tuxedo, so I dug it out.

I said, mom, can you cut about 15, 16 inches off the bottom of the trouser leg, then make me a big floral tie, 'cause I want a costume that makes me look, you know, like a bit of a twit and dad said, what you're wearing now says it all.

[audience laughing] I said, no, come on dad, and I've got to be able to tell jokes.

Now up until that moment, I had never told a joke on stage, just some songs and, [Jim tap dancing] you know, tap dance, but then I remembered watching in music hall an old, old comic.

Oh, he was beautiful.

He had a top hat and tails and a walking stick and he sauntered on the stage and called off into the wings to his chauffeur, put the Rolls in the garage, Jeeves.

I'll butter them later.

[audience laughing] I thought that's a good one.

Oh, I like that one, yes.

I could use that, yeah, and then I remembered another joke about a policeman stopping a motorist and saying, I'm arresting you for exceeding the speed limit, dangerous driving, and trying to bribe a police officer, and the driver said, well, who mentioned bribery?

Policeman said, well, one of us has gotta break the ice.

[audience laughing] I thought, that's a good one.

Like, one or two more like that, that would be perfect.

Then all I needed was a fun song to end the act with because even in those days, every comic ended with a song, whether they could sing or not and then I remembered, "Turned Up," the song I saw when I was that big.

So I dug out a piano copy of it and I read it.

I thought that's great.

The audience know this song, it's an old music hall song.

They can all join in.

So that just left the big entrance.

I remember dad saying, well, why don't you trip over the curtain again, Jim?

And I remember saying, no, no, dad, I want something, I want something funnier, more spectacular, and just then mum finished all the repairs on the trousers.

She said here, Jim, throw these trousers on, see if they work, love, and I remember saying, what was that, mom?

She said, throw these trousers on, and right then I knew that I had my big entrance.

I couldn't practice it, I couldn't rehearse, but I knew I had it.

So cut now to that first night.

There I am standing in the wings where I had been that morning on that very spot waiting for my big audition, and now here I am with two giant stage hands standing on either side of me in that very spot, waiting for my big entrance into show business, and I heard compare explain to the audience what had happened and that they were giving me my very first chance, and without even seeing me, he gave and announced my name.

The audience gave a lovely round of applause and I never came on.

Instead, they all heard me singing, shouting.

No, please put me down.

Put me down.

I've changed my mind, I don't wanna do it.

Please, I don't wanna do it.

Put me down.

What they didn't see were those two giant stagehands.

Each one now, one was holding my legs, the other was holding my arms and these two guys were swinging me backwards and forwards in the wings, and when I said, next time, now, they let go.

I heard a gasp from that audience as my 17 and a half year old body came helicoptering through the air four feet off the ground, and I crashed flat on me back dead center stage.

Absolute silence, [audience laughing] and then I heard it, gradually, laughter, beginning to happen, louder and louder and louder, and once again, the hairs went up on the back of my neck and I knew that I had finally landed in show business.

[audience applauding] ♪ In our little village there has been a tragedy ♪ ♪ Deary deary me such a terrible tragedy ♪ ♪ Mary Ellen Bottomley today should have been wed ♪ ♪ It's a good job that she didn't now so everybody said ♪ ♪ 'Cause Mary Ellen at the church turned up ♪ ♪ Her mother turned up and her dad turned up ♪ ♪ Her sister Gert her rich uncle Bert ♪ ♪ And the parson in his long white shirt ♪ ♪ But no bridegroom with the ring turned up ♪ ♪ But a telegram boy with his nose turned up ♪ ♪ Brought a telegram that read he didn't want to wed ♪ ♪ And that they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ Yes they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ Yes they'd find him in the river with his toes turned up ♪ [Jim scatting] And so I joined the Carroll Levis show.

That was 14 shows a week, 50 weeks a year for two whole years.

♪ And that they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ With his toes turned up yes ♪ ♪ Thank you thank you thank you thank you ♪ [Jim scatting] We played every music hall in every city throughout the British Isles and every week it was the same thing.

Same jokes, the same song.

♪ And that they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ With his toes turned up yes ♪ ♪ Thank you thank you thank you thank you ♪ [Jim scatting] I was so bloody bored.

I just needed new material.

So one night I put in a silly little joke, an innocent little joke.

I said, my dad came into my bedroom this morning.

He looked down.

He said, if you keep doing that, you'll go blind.

I said, dad, I'm over here.

Yeah.

[audience laughing] Innocent.

Yeah, no.

As I came off stage the stage manager, he grabbed me.

He said, you don't do that.

You don't put anything in.

This is music hall.

So the next night it was back to.

♪ And that they'd find him in the river ♪ ♪ With his toes turned up yes ♪ ♪ Thank you thank you thank you thank you ♪ [Jim scatting] Two years, two years I stayed with that show, and then the next big break for me came when the BBC introduced their first rock and roll show on television, and I was asked to go along not to be on the show, but to warm the audience up as a standup comic, which I did, and I, at the end of the jokes, I borrowed one of the guitars from one of the guys and I sang a pop song of the day, and afterwards the producer came up and it was just like Carroll Levis' audition.

He said, those jokes?

I said, yes, he said were terrible.

He said, but that song and that singing you did at the end, that was good.

I tell you what, we'll give you a couple of songs.

You go home, son, you know, just rehearse them.

Come back on Saturday, we'll put you on the show.

I said, yeah, but sorry, I'm a standup comic.

He said, no, you used to be a standup comic.

[audience laughing] You're now a pop singer, and I should explain, when the contract came through from the BBC, my agent's name was Stanley Dale, but instead of putting Jim Smith care of Stanley Dale, somebody pulled Jim Dale, care of Stanley Dale, and there was another comic in England called Jim Smith, and he'd been getting better reviews than I had.

So I decided to keep that name.

So the next week, whether I liked it or not, I was introduced as Britain's latest pop singing sensation, and who should be watching the show that night but a young 27 year old recording manager who phoned me the next morning, and he asked me if I'd like to be his very first pop artist, pop singer.

About a year and a half later, he discovered four guys from Liverpool, John, Paul, George, and Ringo.

[audience laughing] He was of course the great George Martin, eventually, Sir George, yeah.

[audience applauding] Maybe one day Saint George, who knows, but George recorded me and we got a couple of songs into the English hit parade, but then George said, well, come on, Jim, why don't you write your own songs?

You know, earn a few extra bob, so I did.

Mind you, the first three or four came up complete absolute rubbish, but then I wrote a song and I like the words to this one, and I called it "King's Road."

It was all about the swinging '60s in London.

So I decided to make a little demonstration record for my publisher.

So I went into a tiny little recording studio, started to record the song and I needed another guitar to play the introduction, and I didn't have one.

So I thought, oh, I'll do an impression of a guitar.

So I stood there singing.

[Jim imitating guitar] I recorded the song, sent "King's Road" to my publisher.

My publisher sent "King's Road" to a pop singer in England, pop singer recorded "King's Road" as "Dick-A-Dum-Dum."

[audience laughing] Do you believe that, Dick-A?

What a stupid title.

I mean, my kids hated it.

It got on the hit parade, about number three in the hit parade, a big, big hit, but my kids just hated that.

Any, for any dad to write a song called "Dick-A-Dum-Dum" [audience laughing] to a teenage boy, I mean, I remember my two had a big fight in the playground with one kid and his biggest insult that he could hurl at my kids was well, at least my dad, my dad didn't write.

♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A silly side dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ I like the word so ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ I gotta go to Piccadilly ♪ ♪ Gonna Piccadilly ♪ ♪ Of a day to do it on ♪ ♪ Get a room on the Buckingham beat ♪ ♪ Then I'll go to King's Road ♪ ♪ Pick me up a nice real sweet girl ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ I gotta go to Portabella ♪ ♪ Gotta sorta sell a little old antique or two ♪ ♪ Blow it all on a Savile Row suit ♪ ♪ Then I'll go to King's Road ♪ ♪ Pick us up a nice real cute girl ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-Dum ♪ ♪ Everybody dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ I get a girl ♪ ♪ Get a pretty girl ♪ ♪ Get a pretty go-go girl ♪ ♪ And go boy ♪ ♪ Saturday ♪ ♪ That's a part of day ♪ ♪ I'm gonna chat away to the girls who stop to stare ♪ ♪ In shops and boutiques ♪ ♪ Lend us a fiver ♪ ♪ I'll pay you in a few weeks ♪ ♪ I'll take you to there ♪ ♪ Even better get a bus ♪ ♪ Or get a double-decker ♪ ♪ Tour the town around ♪ ♪ Stay aboard 'til the weather gets dry ♪ ♪ Then I go to Kings Road ♪ ♪ Pick us up a nice real shy girl ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ Come on ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-Dum ♪ ♪ Once more ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ Last time ♪ ♪ Dick-a-dum-dum ♪ ♪ A-dick-a-dum-dum ♪ Yes.

[audience applauding] I heard at the very beginning that this name Harry, Harry somebody or other, Harry Potter, Pitter, Potter, Potter, that's it, Harry Potter.

Well, as you know, I did, I recorded all seven books in the series, but what I didn't, [fan cheering] thank you.

[audience laughing] Thank you, but I didn't realize I didn't have to just narrate them.

It was expected that I would put voices to each and every one of the characters and there were over 200 different speaking characters and people say to me, where the heck did you find all those voices, Jim?

Well, I must admit, you know, you, after the first what, three, you do get stuck, [audience laughing] and then I mean, I remember my very first day in a recording studio.

I had never recorded an audio book before and I had no idea what went on.

I mean, my recording studio for instance was minute.

It was just like an expanded coffin on end with a glass front and there was just enough room for a stool.

Let's try.

Where's the stool?

Can we have a stool?

No stool?

- It's right here.

Jim, Jim, right here.

- Oh, there it is, yes.

You were hiding away, weren't you?

Yes, you were.

[scattered audience chuckling] So, just enough room for me to slide in onto this stool facing this giant microphone and on my left, there was a music stand for the script, and on my right here there was a little table with a glass of water and there was a pair of headphones and on the wall, there was a loudspeaker, and I remember sitting there waiting.

The sweat was coming down and I heard the producer through the loudspeaker say, well, welcome to your very first audio book, Jim.

Nervous?

I gave a shaky thumbs up.

I could feel the sweat now on my neck.

He says, so let's have a sound level, shall we?

Why don't you just record, just speak the first page of the script.

"Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone," by JK Rowling.

All right, wake the engineer.

He'll give you the finger.

[audience laughing] I said, excuse me?

hE said, the engineer.

He'll give you the finger.

I thought, what have I done to him?

[audience laughing] And just then the engineer went, and I went, oh, ha!

That finger.

[Jim laughing] I thought, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

He's, shall we start again?

I could feel the sweat running down my back now.

So the engineer twiddled with a few knobs then as promised, gave me the finger and I started to record.

"Harry Potter and the Sor-" Jim, the engineer here.

Could you lean in a bit?

You're a bit too far away from the microphone.

Oh.

"Harry Potter and-" Sorry, Jim, you're still too far away from the mic.

Lean in a bit more, would you?

"Harry Potter and the Sorc-" Sorry, Jim, I'm stopping you again.

You turned away from the microphone.

I said, you have to, I'm reading the script.

He said, yeah, but every time you turn away, we lose your voice.

So try to just face the front.

Don't move at all.

Just face the front, face the front.

Just turn your eyes.

[audience laughing] "Harry Potter and the."

Stop, Jim, I'm stopping you again.

What are you doing?

I said, I'm reading the script.

He said, no, you're scratching your hand.

I, we can hear it.

Don't scratch anything.

Good lad, now don't, just put your hands on your head, in your pocket, sit on them if you'd like, but don't keep moving them.

I said, right, sorry.

[audience laughing] He said, what are you waiting for?

I said, the finger.

He said, oh.

[audience laughing] "Harry Potter and the Sor-" Sorry, Jim, but you're, something else is happening.

I said, look, I'm sorry.

It's my knee.

It always does this when I'm nervous.

He said, well, cross your legs.

[audience laughing] "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone," by J.K. Rowling.

Oh shh, I did it, no.

My fist hit the mic, the mic knocked the jug over.

I slid off the stool and the table collapsed, and that, dear children, is the first time Harry Potter and his voices came alive and they all lived magically ever after.

The end.

[audience applauding] [piano music] My father phoned me one year while I was in New York with some sad news, and he said, Jim, I'm sorry to tell you, but mum and I, we're getting a divorce.

He said, we've been married what, for 48 years and it's just not working out.

[audience laughing] No, he meant it, and he said, I don't wanna talk about it.

Would you tell your brother Mick, and Mick was on holiday in Italy, so I phoned him and he phoned Dad in England, said like hell you're getting a divorce.

No way, Jim and I, we're catching the first plane tomorrow.

We'll be home late afternoon.

Don't do a damn thing, and he slammed the phone down, and in England, dad slowly put his phone down and said to my mother, so they're coming for Christmas and they're paying their own airfare.

[audience laughing] I got you with that one, didn't I?

I got, that is one of the oldest music hall jokes I ever heard, and you lot fell for it.

Suckers.

Suck, suckers.

The last time that I ever suckered an audience with anything like that was when, it was way back in 1980, and I was offered the chance of putting, creating the main character in one of Broadway's great musicals.

It was called "Barnum."

[audience applauding] It was, wasn't it?

It was a magical show.

It was a circus ring on a Broadway stage with jugglers and ringmaster and the clowns and me at one point walking a 38 foot long tightrope eight feet off the ground and singing a song at the same time, hmm.

It was the life of P.T.

Barnum, Phineas Taylor Barnum, the biggest humbugger this country has ever known, and every night I used to race on that stage and yell, Barnum's the name, P.T.

Barnum, and I wanna tell you that tonight on this stage, you are gonna see bar none every sight, wonder, and miracle that name stands for, and whether you think my humbug's a blessing or a curse, you're still gonna buy it.

Why, why?

Because every 60 seconds in this world, a delightful phenomenon takes place which absolutely guarantees it.

♪ There is a sucker born every minute ♪ ♪ Each time the second hand sweeps to the top ♪ ♪ Like dandelions up they pop ♪ ♪ Their ears so big their eyes so wide ♪ ♪ And though I feed 'em bonafide baloney ♪ ♪ With no truth in it ♪ ♪ Why you can bet I'll find some rube to buy my corn ♪ ♪ 'Cause there's a sure-as-shooting sucker born a minute ♪ ♪ And I'm referrin' to the minute you was born ♪ ♪ Each blessed hour brings sixty of 'em ♪ ♪ Each time that wooden cuckoo shows his face ♪ ♪ Another sucker takes his place ♪ ♪ And plunks his quarter on the line ♪ ♪ To buy my brand of genuine malarkey ♪ ♪ God bless and love 'em ♪ ♪ But don't feel sad or hoppin' mad or cause a scene ♪ ♪ 'Cause there's a sure-as-shooting sucker born a minute ♪ ♪ But ma'am you mighta been the minute in between ♪ ♪ If I allow that right here in my hands ♪ ♪ The smallest living human man ♪ ♪ The sight of that is surely worth a dime ♪ ♪ If I present an educated pooch ♪ ♪ Who's trained to dance the hoochie cooch ♪ ♪ What better way to waste a bit of time ♪ ♪ If I import at monumental cost ♪ ♪ A lady fair whose head was lost ♪ ♪ While crossing railroad tracks to pick some zinnias ♪ ♪ Who eats farina through a hose ♪ ♪ And wears pink tights instead of clothes ♪ ♪ If that ain't worth a buck my name ain't Phineas ♪ ♪ Aw you say that's hog wash well who cares ♪ ♪ You'll buy my hog wash long as ♪ ♪ There's a sucker born every minute ♪ ♪ Each time that second hand sweeps to the top ♪ ♪ Like dandelions up they pop ♪ ♪ Their ears so big their eyes so wide ♪ ♪ And though my tale is bonafide baloney ♪ ♪ Just let me spin it ♪ ♪ And ain't no man who can resist me wait and see ♪ ♪ 'Cause there's a sure-as-shooting sucker born a minute ♪ ♪ But ma'am the biggest one excluding none is ♪ ♪ Me ♪ [audience applauding] - Jim Dale, you are having a remarkable life and thank you for being here.

- Thank you for having me.

[audience applauding] - I have to say, it sort of seems like the idea of doing an American musical about P.T.

Barnum, a very American man who is a circus figure and putting a circus on a Broadway stage is a tricky, tricky thing to do.

I know that Joe Layton was the director of it.

How did he figure out how to put a circus successfully on a Broadway stage as part of a show?

- One of the most talented directors I've ever worked with, because instead of saying, this is what I want you to do, what he said is, I want you to show me what the best thing you can do in the way of a magic trick or a juggling trick, and I will build that scene around you, and there was one lovely song called "One Brick at a Time."

- Right.

- Now that originated from one guy with cigar boxes.

He had three cigar boxes, you know, that trick, and they developed the whole scene with everybody playing with cigar boxes, throwing them to each other, all to rhythm, and it was one of the most successful choreographed songs I've ever seen in my life, but Joe Layton was probably the great director, and it hasn't been repeated on Broadway because you can't do it again with the same people or with the same director.

It was the magic of Joe Layton that created the ideas.

It was the talent of the young circus performers.

- When you look at the career, the remarkable career that you've had, obviously there are highlights.

Is there anything you regret not doing?

- "Hamlet on Ice."

[audience laughing] - There's time, there's time.

[Jim chuckling] - Anything I regret doing?

No, you know, I consider that show business is really the showbiz tree and it's got many branches and many boughs and all that, and I think if you're gonna be in this showbiz world, it's best to climb up this tree and explore every branch and every bough.

You may not like the view from one branch.

So I come back, you don't have to stay up there, try something else, so take every opportunity, 'cause you can only fail.

[audience laughing] You can only fail or you can be good.

- Right, right.

- And I've, I say I've failed on a few things, but it's been fun while you fail.

Christopher Logue wrote a beautiful poem, and he said, Apollinaire said, come to the edge.

It's too high.

Come to the edge.

We might fall.

Come to the edge, and they came, and he pushed them and they flew.

- That's great, that's a great.

- It's a beautiful poem.

[audience applauding] - That's great.

- I was gonna leave a song out.

It was called "Georgy Girl."

Now I've gotta put it in, but bear with me because this is a true story.

It was written by Tom Springfield, Dusty Springfield's brother.

I wrote the lyrics and the first time we ever played it to the director was when Tom and I visited his offices, and he'd never heard the song before and we were ushered into this big room and in it, there was a giant piano, there was a desk and there was a long, long black leather couch and sitting on it, there were two mafia looking henchmen sitting there.

I don't know what they did in the film, but they looked tough.

They were wearing dark suits and one of them explained to us, you know, that the director would be late and his voice, it was just like Marlon Brando from "The Godfather," remember that one?

And he said to me, in the meanwhile, play the song for us.

Now they didn't look, you know, like the kind of guys you say no to.

So I said, for you, anything.

So I just about to start to play when one of 'em said, hold it, and he stood up and he walked to the window and he stood there with his hands over his face like this.

The other one stood up, walked over and did this, then said, ready when you are.

I couldn't believe it, and so I have, Tom started laughing.

I turned away, changed my coughing fit into a laugh, and started to sing.

♪ Hey there Georgy Girl ♪ Hold it, hold it, hold it, forget about it.

I said, what are you talking about?

He said, no, no, for this film, we need a song that Sinatra can record, something like, you know, Georgy girl, I love the way you wear your hair, you know, something like that, but what you got there, it ain't gonna woik, it ain't gonna woik.

W-O-I-K, woik, and just then, in came the director.

Big introductions were made.

He said, can I hear the song?

I said, by all means.

So he was, went and sat down on the desk.

I said, do you wanna stand near the door?

He said, what the hell for?

I said, I've absolutely no idea, and Tom started to play, and I started to sell it.

♪ I said hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ Swingin' down the street so fancy-free ♪ ♪ Nobody you meet could ever see ♪ ♪ The loneliness there ♪ ♪ Inside you ♪ ♪ Hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ Why do all the boys just pass you by ♪ ♪ Could it be you just don't try ♪ ♪ Or is it the clothes you wear ♪ ♪ You're always window-shopping ♪ ♪ But never stopping to buy ♪ ♪ So shed those dowdy feathers and fly ♪ ♪ Well just a little bit ♪ ♪ Hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ There's another Georgy deep inside ♪ ♪ Bring out all the love you hide ♪ ♪ And oh what a change there'll be ♪ ♪ The world would see ♪ ♪ A new Georgy girl ♪ ♪ Don't be so scared of changing ♪ ♪ And rearranging yourself ♪ ♪ It's time for jumping down from the shelf ♪ ♪ Oh just a little bit ♪ ♪ Hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ There's another Georgy deep inside ♪ ♪ Bring out all the love you hide ♪ ♪ And oh what a change there'll be ♪ ♪ The world would see ♪ ♪ A new Georgy girl ♪ And the director said, great, I love it, and both of those guys yelled out, just what we told them, boss.

Oh, oh, it's great, couldn't be better.

Really great job.

♪ Don't be so scared of changing and rearranging yourself ♪ ♪ Well it's time for jumping down from that shelf ♪ ♪ Just a little bit ♪ ♪ Hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ There's another Georgy deep inside ♪ ♪ Bring out all the love you hide ♪ ♪ And oh what a change there'll be ♪ ♪ The world would see a new Georgy girl ♪ Nominated for an Oscar.

You should have won.

♪ Georgy girl ♪ Top of the hit parade.

♪ Number one Georgy girl ♪ Sold 11 million records.

♪ It was fun Georgy girl ♪ [audience applauding] Thank you, thank you so much.

Thank you.

In the '70s, I was returning to England via New York, after coming from Hollywood, where I'd been starring in a film by the Disney studios.

I'd been on stage with three other Academy Award winners, Shelley Winters, Red Buttons, and the great Mickey Rooney, and the film turned out to be one of the big hits for did, Disney for children.

It was called "Pete's Dragon."

I remember, oh you remember, thank you.

[scattered audience applauding] I remember feeling in a great mood as I walked up Madison Avenue and I saw a shop.

It was an art to wear shop selling one of a kind pieces of wonderful, wonderful things that top artists had created in their own textile world, and I looked around this gallery for about an hour.

I was completely enthralled by it.

Then finally, I couldn't help it.

I walked out with the most beautiful thing in the gallery, which was the owner, [audience laughing] and that was what, 45 years ago, and I'm still walking out with her.

[audience applauding] No, she's in the audience tonight, probably under the seat with embarrassment because, you know, she knows that I love being up here just entertaining, but oh, she'd rather walk through fire, and it's amazing, you know, after all this togetherness, how two people can have such opposite points of view and yet still see eye to eye.

♪ The colors of my life are softer than a breeze ♪ ♪ The silver gray of eiderdown ♪ ♪ And the dappled green of trees ♪ ♪ The amber of a wheat field ♪ ♪ The hazel of a seed ♪ ♪ The crystal of a raindrop ♪ ♪ That's all she'll ever need ♪ ♪ My reds are much too bold ♪ ♪ In gold she finds no worth ♪ ♪ She fills her days with sage and brown ♪ ♪ The colors of the earth ♪ ♪ And if from by her side this love should roam ♪ ♪ Then the colors of her life will leave a gentle light ♪ ♪ To lead me home ♪ ♪ But the colors of my life are bountiful and bold ♪ ♪ The purple glow of indigo ♪ ♪ And the gleam of green and gold ♪ ♪ The splendor of a sunrise ♪ ♪ The dazzle of a flame ♪ ♪ The glory of a rainbow ♪ ♪ I put 'em all to shame ♪ ♪ No quiet browns and grays ♪ ♪ I'll take my days instead ♪ ♪ And fill them 'til they overflow ♪ ♪ With rose and cherry red ♪ ♪ And should this sunlit world grow dark one day ♪ ♪ Then the colors of my life ♪ ♪ Will leave a shining light to show the way ♪ [audience applauding] Thank you so much.

Thank you so much.

You know, looking back over all these years, I often wondered, you know, where did this love of mine for laughter come from?

You know, could it have been that first laugh that I ever heard when my mother went tada, you know, or was it when I said to my dad, dad, that's what I want to do?

I don't know where it came from, but I do know that even today, after all these years, I'm still as nervous as anything before I come on onto the stage.

I've always been like that.

You saw me tonight, Mark, shivering in the wings.

Once I get out here, I'm fine.

I feel so at home, I feel good, but I remember when I was about this big.

I was standing in the wings of a show that I was doing and I was really shaking, and my dad was in the first row on the end seat, and he saw the state I was in.

He came racing backstage and he put his arm around me, and he said, Jim, lad.

I said, what, Dad, what?

He said, oh Jim, I'm so proud of you.

I said, thank you dad.

He said, now quick question.

You know, Jim you've, you've got something, Jim, something that I could never, never, ever teach you, and I said, what's that, dad?

And he said.

Timing.

[audience laughing] ♪ So let me sing a funny song ♪ ♪ With crazy words that roll along ♪ ♪ And if that song can start you laughing ♪ ♪ I'm happy oh I'm happy ♪ ♪ Might compose a one line joke ♪ ♪ Blazing egg goes up in smoke ♪ ♪ But if one guy laughs or starts to choke ♪ ♪ I'll be hap hap happy ♪ ♪ And comedy steps from way back when ♪ ♪ They dance them out on the streets ♪ ♪ And if comedy steps can touch your heart ♪ ♪ And starts tapping your feet ♪ ♪ Then I'm happy ♪ ♪ And deep jokes I'll tell a few ♪ ♪ With a twist to make 'em new ♪ ♪ Well if that could milk a laugh or two ♪ ♪ I'll be ♪ Oh, Mark, just a minute.

Last, time, last story.

True story.

About a year ago, I went to a party and the lady came over to me and she said, did you ever work with, and she named a very, very famous Broadway actress, and I said to her, I said, no, actually I never did, but I've seen her, and she's terrible.

Gosh, she really was.

No, no, she couldn't act her way out of the paper bag.

She and her voice, I'm really, I couldn't help it.

She screeched, it was like a cat, and I think she was probably one of the worst actresses I've ever come across, and the woman said she was my aunt, [audience laughing] and I said, let me finish.

♪ Comedy steps from way back when ♪ ♪ They dance them out on the street ♪ ♪ And if comedy steps can touch your heart ♪ ♪ And start you tapping your feet ♪ ♪ Then I'm happy ♪ ♪ Looking back I must confess ♪ ♪ That in my lifetime I've been blessed ♪ ♪ 'Cause I've done it all ♪ ♪ Said I've done it all ♪ ♪ You're not impressed ♪ ♪ But I'm hap hap hap hap happy ♪ ♪ So thank you thank you thank you thank you ♪ [audience applauding] [lively piano music] Thanks.

Thank you.

Mark.

[audience applauding] - [Narrator] "The American Songbook Series at NJPAC" is presented through the generous support of the Blanche and Irving Laurie Foundation, the David S. Steiner and Sylvia Steiner Charitable Trust, the Joan and Allen Bildner Family Fund, and the Smart Family Foundation, David S. Stone Esquire, Stone & Magnanini.

♪ I said hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ Swingin' down the street so fancy-free ♪ ♪ Nobody you meet could ever see ♪ ♪ The loneliness there ♪ ♪ Inside you ♪ ♪ Hey there Georgy girl ♪ ♪ Why do all the boys just pass you by ♪ ♪ Could it be you just don't try ♪ ♪ Or is it the clothes you wear ♪ ♪ You're always window-shopping ♪ ♪ But never stopping to buy ♪ ♪ So shed those dowdy feathers and fly ♪ ♪ Well just a little big ♪ ♪ Hey there Georgy girl ♪