- [Narrator] Funding for this edition of One-On-One with Steve Adubato has been provided by The Turrell Fund, supporting Reimagine Childcare.

Delta Dental of New Jersey.

Everyone deserves a healthy smile.

Valley Bank.

NJM Insurance Group.

Serving New Jersey'’s drivers, homeowners and business owners for more than 100 years.

The Fidelco Group.

New Jersey Sharing Network.

Johnson & Johnson.

Rutgers University Newark.

And by Prudential Financial.

Promotional support provided by BestofNJ.com, all New Jersey in one place.

And by Insider NJ.

- This is One-On-One.

- I'm an equal American just like you are.

- The way we change presidents in this country is by voting.

- I'’m hopeful that this is the beginning to accountability.

- Life without dance is boring.

- I don't care how good you are or how good you think you are, there is always something to learn.

- I did do the finale, and guess where my trailer was?

A block away from my apartment, it couldn'’t have been better!

- People call me 'cause they feel nobody's paying attention.

-_ It'’s not all about memorizing and getting information, it'’s what you do with that information.

- (slowly) Start talking right now.

- That's a good question, high five.

(upbeat music) - Hi, everyone.

I'm Steve Adubato.

We are honored to, once again, be joined by our friend, Carlos Lejnieks, who is President and CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters of Essex, Hudson, and Union Counties.

Good to see you, Carlos.

- Good see you Steve.

Thanks for having me.

Let everybody know the Big Brothers Big Sisters work as we put up the website.

It's so important.

Go ahead.

- I appreciate that.

I've been the CEO of Big Brothers Big Sisters for about 14 years.

We pair up one-to-one mentors for young people in our community in Essex, Hudson, and Union Counties.

And through a evidence based mentoring program that's been around for over a century, we, based on common interests and commonalities, have caring adults in the lives of our kids.

During the pandemic if we learned anything else, the power of human connection is definitely needed amongst us all, but particularly for our young people that come to our doors.

About a third of our kids come to us referred by the state social work system.

They face challenges, but with the power of a one-to-one mentor, we see positive things increase, like school attendance, school grades, and then high school graduation rates and also college matriculation rates.

We see negative things decrease as well.

So we know that the secret sauce of mentoring works and I have been doing this for 14 years and looking to be strong coming out of the pandemic to recruit more mentors.

- Yeah, you mentioned the pandemic, Carlos, let's get into that.

And we'll come back to the healthcare issues in just a moment.

So the greatest impact of the pandemic as we're taping this program toward the back end of the Summer 2022, the greatest impact that COVID has had on the work of your organization is?

- Twofold.

Academic loss, as well as a depression.

We saw during the pandemic that our young people when they were isolated, they faced traumas, especially because of the families from once they come, who were essential workers.

Online learning was not what it was cracked up to be.

- No.

It's not a disparaging comment on the teachers, they were trying to do what they could.

However, everyone saw what was playing out and our young people needed that additional support.

Unfortunately, not all of them were able to get it.

So we saw an academic loss that has yet to be fully quantified.

But McKinsey recently put together a study that talked about something like nine to 15 months of academic loss for young people, especially in under-resourced communities.

And so how do we come out of this catching them up and having them get the skills necessary and the desire to graduate from high school, go off to college so they become competitive in a world economy?

And then lastly, the social and emotional development of our kids was really challenging during the pandemic.

And we still see the trauma of that ripple into today.

We had our referrals for supports around therapeutic supports, and behavioral health supports, and depressive elements of our young people be more than doubled during the pandemic.

So we're very in tune with the social and emotional needs of our kids.

And we think that a caring, stable adult mentor in the life of our kids helps mitigate and buffer against that.

- But real quick though, on this, Carlos.

But a lot of the mentoring was going on remotely.

- Yeah, so the blessing of our work was that we had strength of relationship before.

Many of our relationships had been years in the making, so they had each other to lean on.

- They had history.

They had history.

- Conversation, absolutely.

So they were known to each other.

And then of course, we all had to pivot to virtual.

But we know coming out of this, there's nothing that replicates in person human connection.

- Yeah, and those new relationships are hard to establish remotely out of the box.

But listen, the work is important.

And that's why we put up the website for those who are interested in volunteering, making a difference with the young people that Carlos is talking about.

Follow up there, follow up on the website.

Over at Jersey City Medical Center, you are the first person of Latinx heritage to serve as chairperson of the board.

It's a big deal.

First of all, congratulations.

- Thank you, sir.

Thank you, sir.

It's a real (indistinct) responsibility.

- Talk about what needs to be done there.

- Well, about a decade ago, I joined on as a board member just as a community leader.

Given my role at Big Brothers Big Sisters, we were actively involved in respecting what Jersey City Medical Center was doing every single day.

We hire from our community.

We see what our families and students are like.

And so there was this incredible respect.

And when they asked me to join the board, I of course, took on that responsibility, and seeing what the impact is of our community.

But having a diverse set of eyes at the board level, as well as at the C-suite, as well as at the staffing level, is essential I think, to make sure that we're aligned with culturally competent care, our alignment with how we view the assets of our community, and how better to address the call to action for some of our needs in our community.

And so, you know, throughout the years they had pulled me in the hospital, had pulled me into various community engagement opportunities, as well as committee work.

And in the committee work, you really see where all the work is done, with the frontline workers, talking about nursing, talking about the docs, talk about our complete staff, about 2,500 staff members, a majority of whom come from our community.

But I'm particularly proud about our nurses and what they were able to do during the pandemic.

- Absolutely.

- You know, the board asked me to be on a committee two times in a row where we presented to an independent body that evaluates quality of nursing.

And it's a high level status called the Magnet Award status.

We've won this four times.

- Magnet Award.

- We won it four times in a row.

And for the six hundred nurses that we have in our hospitals, it's a real validation of the hard work that they took on.

But especially the case that we just got the distinction for the fourth time about a month ago.

And coming out of the pandemic, this was such a shot in the arm for the culture of our team.

What they were doing during the pandemic was just God's work.

And weathering the storm and doing it committed to purpose, and committed to our people was just incredible.

So I'm really grateful to be a small part in that conversation.

- It's so interesting.

First of all, Jersey City Medical Center, part of the larger RWJBarnabas healthcare system, significant supporters of public broadcasting.

But the really interesting thing for me is this.

Carlos is talking about the nurses and other clinicians on the frontline, whether it's at Jersey City Medical Center or any other healthcare organization hospital system.

Heroes, that first.

Now, what the heck?

- We can't forget.

What is that, go ahead, Carlos.

What is that about?

- We can't forget them.

We can't forget the issue.

I remember two years ago when we were banging pots and pans in celebration of our nurses.

We were trying to do that to show support in the way we can.

- Now there targets for people who are peeved at whatever, and frustrated, and COVID restrictions, and policies of the government, and what medicine is appropriate or not, or are cleared by the CDC.

Now, it's like their targets?

How does that happen?

- Unreal.

Politics is the devil's work.

And we are here to lift up what they are, which are our heroes, and will continue to be so.

They've always been the case.

When you walk through the, some people ask me why Jersey City Medical Center?

What is of quality of them?

And we could talk about all the accolades, but I will tell you it's highly personal.

I moved my mom from Montclair where she lived to Hudson County, to Jersey city.

My mom has personal needs that she leans on healthcare system pretty regularly.

I will tell you nothing more precious than my mother to walk through the doors and the people that greet her, the nurses on the front end, as well as the docs, and the clinicians, and everyone else, takes no one better care than to my mother than those out of our institution.

So it's a highly personal one.

We can list all the accolades, but this is where the rubber hits the road.

And for those who vilify those in the front line, you know, I think there's a special place-- - There's a special place.

Let's just leave it at that.

- That's right.

- And Carlos's point, not only at that particular institution, but to all the hospitals, hospital systems, and to all the frontline workers, you continue to be heroes, regardless of how some folks may want to take out their frustration.

Carlos, thank you so much, my friend.

Best to you and all the folks at the organization.

Take care.

- Thank you so much, Steve.

Thank you.

- You got it.

Stay with us.

We'll be right back.

- [Narrator] To watch more One on One with Steve Adubato find us online and follow us on Social media.

- Folks recently, my colleague Jacqui Tricarico and I, who is the executive producer of Think Tank and also of our series Remember Them, we were out there at the New Jersey Sharing Network 5K, it's over in New Providence, New Jersey.

Jacqui had a chance to sit down-- Now, she wasn't sitting down, she was standing up and talking to a whole range of people who have powerful, compelling stories about organ and tissue donation, about the gift of life at the 5K, the Sharing Network.

Here's Jacqui.

- Joining me now is Catherine Gross and her sister Colleen Bol.

Catherine actually received a liver transplant just back in February - [Catherine Gross] February.

And half of the liver came from your sister.

- Yes.

Yep.

- Yep.

- I need to hear more about this story.

So tell me about what happened and why you needed to receive a liver transplant.

- Sure.

So I've had some autoimmune diseases pretty much my entire adult life.

One of which is called Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis, which I know is a mouthful.

It goes by PSC, which is the abbreviation for it.

And as part of that disease, you are at a greater likelihood for a lot of complications, including something called Cholangiocarcinoma, which is bile duct cancer.

And I had bile duct cancer.

So I first got bile duct cancer in 2019, and I was able to have a, what they call a liver resection, where they removed part of my liver.

But when I was diagnosed again this past fall, that wasn't an option for me.

So I got the formal diagnosis in December and found out that my only chance really for survival was a living donor.

So we started that process, - [Jacqui Tricarico] Okay.

and we were able to identify my sister, - Well how do, when you know that you need a living donor, because this is the first time we're talking to somebody who's had a living donor - [Catherine Gross] Yeah.

transplant.

How does that process start?

Well how does the reach out start?

Is the New Jersey Sharing Network involved right away?

- Actually, we weren't involved with the New Jersey Sharing Network because it was a living donor situation.

The hospital network that I was with and my doctor suggested that I start with people I knew.

So, and I started with what I call the big ask.

So they said, you know, go to your friends and family and see if you can get somebody who you know.

When it comes to living donors, the preference is for somebody that does know you.

Obviously, there are many cases where people do the altruistic gift and they give to somebody, a complete stranger, but ideally, if they can find somebody that knows you and has a personal connection to you, that is preferred.

- And it needs to be a perfect match too.

It just can't be anybody.

And I'm sure that perfect match can most likely come from somebody in your family.

So Colleen, tell me when you knew that she needed a transplant, what was your first thought?

- Well my first thought, honestly, was that it was me.

I knew, - [Jacqui Tricarico] You knew.

Yeah, I knew all along it was gonna be me.

I would be the right person for it and the most appropriate person to do it.

And I knew that my blood type was compatible.

I knew that, I mean, obviously the relationships there, you know, were sisters.

it just, I never doubted that it would be me.

- And you never had a second thought?

Was it a scary decision for you?

- Oh well, I mean it's certainly scary.

It's a big undertaking.

It's a major surgery, so you know there's gonna be some recovery, and there's some risk involved, but I was very confident in it the whole time.

I really had no doubts at all.

- That's amazing.

And talk about the day of the surgery.

What happened?

How did things unfold?

How did everything go?

And I wanna hear from you, but then also Colleen, because being a living donor I think people need to understand, like, you know what is it like in the aftermath of it?

So talk about the day of, and going into surgery with your sister.

- Well, our surgery was at Mount Sinai in New York City.

So we stayed overnight the night before because we had to be there very early in the morning.

And of course it was highly emotional, you know.

Highly emotionally charged and the emotions run the gamut.

For me, obviously I was very concerned about my sister.

I was also very concerned about myself.

I was very concerned about the outcome 'cause there was a lot of questions.

And with a living donor, I can't speak to a deceased donor transplant, because I didn't experience that.

But in our experience and in my personal experience there was a chance, when we got into surgery, that the surgery may not be able to proceed.

For me because it was related to cancer.

If they got in and saw that the cancer had spread too far beyond my liver, they wouldn't have even begun the operation on her.

So as you can see, there were a lot of unknowns and that can of course lead to a whole mix of emotions.

But we were there together.

We were actually in the room together leading up to when they took me in.

And then they took my sister in I think about an hour later.

- Yeah.

- So.

- Yeah, We were literally holding hands until the moment I was wheeled in.

- And the surgery went really well.

And - Yeah.

talk about the recovery afterwards for you as being the donor.

- It was as expected.

I felt like I was very prepared for it.

Mount Sinai did a great job.

I felt like they set me up with mentors of people who had been living donors in the past.

So I felt like I knew what to expect there.

It's tough, you know.

Initially it's really hard but - It's a major surgery.

- It's a major surgery.

I mean-- - Like, how are you feeling now?

- I feel great.

I feel great.

I mean, I feel like I really bounced back.

I recovered well.

- Cause again, it's only been a couple of months really - It's been four months.

Not even, - [Catherine Gross] Not even.

Not even.

Three and a half months.

Yeah.

- She was great.

We were both in the ICU afterwards, but she moved out of the ICU very quickly.

She was up walking very quickly.

- Yeah.

- And she was released very quickly from the hospital.

She still had to stay nearby, from observation.

- [Colleen Bol] Yeah.

But - And obviously for you, it was more of a major surgery for you.

- Well when you're the person who's actually sick, it's a different experience than the person who is well.

And obviously you need to be in good health, as she was, to be a living donor.

That's one of the key criteria.

- [Jacqui Tricarico] Yeah.

- And so you're, with anything, if you have a surgery and you're in good health, the recovery is anticipated to go better.

And so we're glad it did for her.

- Yeah.

And I'm so glad that you're both here today, feeling good enough to be here at the Sharing Network 5K Event.

What does it mean to both of you to be here today to witness what this is really all about and help things unfold here at the 5K every year?

- Well, it's great.

- Yeah.

It's great, right?

It's great.

It's, I mean, back when this was all happening, it felt very, you know, obviously emotional and scary and not really sure what to expect over the next few months.

And I think it's been surprising.

Our recovery has been surprisingly good.

Our support from our family and friends have been wonderful.

Being part of this is is even more amazing, right?

Being able to walk this on this beautiful day, I think it's great.

I mean, I can't.

- And for anybody like who is questioning like, okay being a living donor is a whole 'nother thing, right?

So if anybody's questioning being a living donor or you know, checking that mark off on their driver's license, or doing it online to become - [Catherine Gross] Yeah.

a donor in general, what would you be your message as being someone who just-- - I would say explore it.

Certainly, you know, keep an open mind and do it.

You know, if you have that personal connection I think it's an easy decision to make.

if you maybe don't and it's somebody who's not a sister, or a loved one, a friend or whatever, maybe it feels like a bigger decision to make, but you'll be surprised.

I mean, it's mostly the unknown, right?

The unknown is scary, but if you educate yourself beforehand and you're prepared, and you trust the process, like I trust it very much that they would only do what was right for me, and that they wouldn't even pursue it with me if I wasn't healthy enough to come out successful from it.

So I felt really, I felt completely confident going into it.

- And one thing I'd like to just add to that is that the hospital really underscored that the living donor is the priority.

And I think that's important for people to know.

You know they are put first, as they should be, because they are doing something, you know, incredibly generous, and so they should be.

So her health as my living donor, was prioritized.

And that may help people get over some of that fear and trepidation of pursuing it.

- And for you, with your sister.

- [Catherine Gross] Yeah.

- I'm sure there's probably no words that you can ever say to her, to say thank you for doing this.

How has that been for you to try to show her or tell her how important this was for you?

- Impossible?

Let's just say it's impossible - But unnecessary, because it, I mean it was just gonna happen regardless.

So yeah.

So it's all good.

There's no need for that.

- I've tried.

I've tried.

(Catherine and Jacqui laugh) And I will always try.

I continue to try for the rest of my life.

If I could say, you know, I also, as part of my surgery received an artery from a deceased donor.

So, you know we are here supporting, obviously living donors.

We're celebrating my life, our success.

But we're also really in support of the whole initiative, and the message of the Sharing Network.

We couldn't be more thankful.

- Well, thank you.

And we're thankful that you're sharing your story and this helps educate people about organ donation, how important it is, tissue donation, and you know, your own story is incredible.

So thank you for sharing.

- Thank you so much Jacqui.

- Thank you so much.

- Thank you.

- [Narrator] To watch more One on One with Steve Adubato find us online and follow us on Social media.

- We're now joined by Kelly Browning, who is executive director of Impact Teen Drivers.

Kelly, great to have you with us.

- Thanks for having me on your show, Steve.

- We will put up the website of Impact Teen Drivers.

Tell us what the organization is and why it's so critically important with all the distractions around us, with teen drivers, with all of us, but particularly teens.

- Absolutely.

Impact Teen Drivers is a nonprofit organization dedicated to stopping the number one unintentional injury for young people, which are car crashes.

In particular, we look at car crashes caused by reckless and distracted driving.

You just noted your cell phone, which certainly is our newest nemesis and the one that our, most of us, our brain goes immediately to when we talk about distracted driving.

But I think it's really important to recognize that this has been the number one killer of young people long before cell phones came out.

There are many different types of distractions.

We have visual distraction, which is anything that really takes our eyes off the road.

Manual is anything that's taking our hands off the wheel.

And one that most of us don't think about is that cognitive distraction takes our mind off of our driving.

And then of course, even auditory distraction.

If you can't hear, your ears aren't alert, that's a distraction.

So there's four primary types of distraction.

I always tell the young people that for us older folks that know the YMCA songs still, you can just change the "Y" to a "V" and you have the Visual, the Manual, the Cognitive, and the Auditory distraction.

We have a lot of fun with that.

So young people can think about it less as the tool that's the issue and more about the behavior.

- So it's so interesting.

We have a 17-year-old and a 19-year-old.

By the time this airs, they'll be 18 and 20 'cause it's a couple weeks, it's gonna sit in the can if you will.

But I realize that those are our two boys, and I realize that when we talk to them about this issue, it doesn't have the impact of watching what we do, meaning, it ain't what we say, it's what we do.

Is it not, Kelly?

- That's exactly right.

We always say the, "Do as I say, not as I do" didn't work for us, it certainly isn't gonna work for our kids.

A large component, significant component, of the program work that we do that's team-centric is working with parents and talking to parents about being the driver they want their child to be.

So Steve, if you and I are driving down the road, and we're doing five miles over the speed limit while we're slugging back a latte and talking on the phone, we can't wonder why our young people are gonna turn around and do 15 miles over the speed limit while they're live streaming and eating a double-decker taco or something.

So our behaviors are significantly influencing our young people.

They've been watching us since they were forward-facing in a car seat for the past 15 years.

- Has social media and the obsession that many have, not just young people, but let's talk about teens right now.

The constant engaging on social media.

I don't mean just texting, but beyond that, has it made the situation on the roads more treacherous, Kelly?

- Absolutely.

I think that's a big part of what we do is focusing less on that particular issue.

Let me say that different, less on what's the flavor of the month.

So whether it's texting or social media, etc., and more trying to get young people to understand it's about the behaviors.

Again, those distraction behaviors.

And I'll give you a real concrete example.

A few years ago, we did a focus group and a young person came in and said, "You know, I'd never text and drive.

That's just dumb."

But three questions later, he said "I would never have to text and drive 'cause I can just look at my Apple Watch."

And he flipped his watch up.

And we had another young woman that did it with taking a selfie while the car's moving with the driver, but she would never text and drive.

So if we just focus on that one thing versus really understanding how our behaviors and our lack of focus behind the wheel can become lethal, we're really missing the boat.

- What about the alcohol piece of this?

- Yeah.

Alcohol is really, really important.

Impaired driving from an alcohol or drug standpoint is something we need to continue to message on.

However, 75% of all fatal teen driving crashes actually don't involve alcohol and drugs.

Steve, they're doing a better job than our generation did.

They understand it.

It doesn't mean there's still lot of people doing it and that we shouldn't continue to educate and enforce against it, but the vast majority of young people in car crashes don't involve impairment.

They're just making better decisions behind the wheel about impairment right now.

- Let me ask you this.

Our friends at NJM, New Jersey Manufacturers, have talked to us about this issue, pushed it for a long time.

It's obviously a part of what they care about, and so I understand a lot of their motivation.

What's yours?

- I have worked for years on behavior change with young people because I honestly have more confidence in young people to change the culture, in this case, the culture around driving and safe driving so it's distraction free, then I do people my own age.

And what I mean by that, early 1980s, 10%-13% of us were wearing our seat belts.

Today, in most of our states, people are wearing their seatbelt and have seatbelt compliances 90 to 94%.

So we changed the culture, right?

We stopped seeing it as government telling me to wear my seatbelt and started recognize it as, "Gosh, this is actually a necessary safety device that could keep myself and my family safe."

And that's really what I see with young people.

I believe that young people can truly change this culture.

Without NJM support in our Northeastern states, we wouldn't be able to offer our programming free to schools and communities.

So we're really grateful for those public/private partnerships.

- Yeah, but again, how did you get in- For you getting into this, I'm curious.

- So my background is in criminology.

That's what my PhD is in.

And I've always been interested in getting affect to get effect, regardless of what the issue is.

I worked in homicide, suicide, substance abuse, and mental health.

And this issue is the one issue that I really feel affects every single one of us.

If we're a roadway user, whether we have kids or not, doesn't matter.

If you ride bikes, if you walk on the sidewalks, this issue affects us.

So it's something that I feel we can- We know car crashes are preventable.

We know what we need to do to prevent them.

We just need to make those choices and decisions behavior change to make that happen.

So I love anything that's "it's a winnable battle", and I believe this truly is a winnable battle.

- Hmm.

Kelly, P.S., before I let you go.

Do you have direct conversations with peers of yours about this, whether in the car with them or not, in terms of what they need to do?

- Absolutely.

We have to remember, adults, we are some of the worst.

My kids will always say, "My parents are the worst.

They're the worst distracted drivers."

What we try and talk to 'em about is how they can encourage their parents, their family members, Steve, we didn't start talking to kids about wearing seat belts when they were 16.

We started when they were in car seats.

So we actually have elementary programs and middle school programs.

And we talk to our colleagues.

We have policies at my organization.

We don't do any business while anybody's on the phone, whether they work for us or not.

It's just safety first.

- Kelly, I have a feeling you just helped a lot of people.

Kelly Browning, executive director of Impact Teen Drivers.

Their website has been up.

Follow up, find out more.

Kelly, I thank you for joining us and providing an important public service and public safety message.

Thank you, Kelly.

- Thank you, Steve.

- I'm Steve Adubato.

Thank you so much for watching.

We'll see you next time.

- [Narrator] One-On-One with Steve Adubato has been a production of the Caucus Educational Corporation.

Funding has been provided by The Turrell Fund, supporting Reimagine Childcare.

Delta Dental of New Jersey.

Valley Bank.

NJM Insurance Group.

The Fidelco Group.

New Jersey Sharing Network.

Johnson & Johnson.

Rutgers University Newark.

And by Prudential Financial.

Promotional support provided by BestofNJ.com.

And by Insider NJ.

(Music playing) NJM Insurance Company has been serving New Jersey policy holders for more than 100 years.

But just who are NJM'’s policy holders?

They'’re the men and women who teach our children.

The public sector employees who maintain our infrastructure.

The workers who craft our manufactured goods.

And New Jersey'’s next generation of leaders.

The people who make our state a great place to call home.

NJM, we'’ve got New Jersey covered.