(upbeat music) - Hi everyone, Steve Adubato.

We kick off the program with an in-depth interview that my colleague, Mary Gamba.

Mary is the co-host of our sister series "Lessons and Leadership."

We sat down and talked to Carlos Medina, President and CEO of the Statewide Hispanic Chamber of Commerce in New Jersey.

We talked to Carlos about his leadership journey, board leadership, and also a series that Carlos has on Public Broadcasting called "Que Pasa New Jersey."

Carlos Medina, check it out.

- Carlos, good to see you, buddy.

- Always a pleasure to see you, Steve.

- Listen, first, before we get into leadership, can you promote "Que Pasa?"

- Sure.

I'm on season six of "Que Pasa."

It airs on Saturdays, nine in the morning.

Next episode will be a Father's Day special airing in a week and a half and it'll be a fun episode.

- Great, and we'll also put up the website so people can find out more and also broadcast with our partners at NJ PBS.

Hey, Carlos, talk to us about this, your leadership journey, pretty unique.

Describe it.

- Sure.

I was somebody who grew up with a very strict father, so I'm sure you could appreciate that.

(chuckles) - Just a little bit.

- So going to law school was not an option in my house, I was going to law school.

And it was a struggle.

I was shy, I wasn't a public speaker like I've been forced to be now.

I still get nervous getting in front of folks, but dad was very aggressive and then fast forward to the chamber being in crisis, I was an attorney working at an engineering firm and we were $300,000 in the hole.

Our founder became ill and somebody had to step forward and I sat with dad and dad was like, "You know, I think it's a good thing to do, but, you know, sit with your family, let 'em know the additional hours you're gonna be working."

And, you know, I'm glad I did, that's probably the moment that changed my life the most was joining the chamber, helping turn them around.

- Yeah, lemme follow up on that.

Mary'll jump in in a second.

Without getting back on a soapbox, I was saying that when you lead an organization, particularly a nonprofit, 300 grand in the hole, right?

You step in.

I was saying, and I believe this, even with great partners like Mary who is an exceptional leader, that very often leadership when you're having to make budget is lonely.

Is that just me crying the blues or do you think it's true?

- It's true.

I was picking up the phone call, you know, to call friends.

I called friends from high school and I think at some point people stopped picking up the call 'cause it probably got around the community, Carlos is looking to save the chamber, don't pick up.

(Steve laughs) You know?

"Hey, Sam, he's about to call you, I'm just giving you the heads up."

That was tough, I mean, we had people leave the board when they saw the finances, which was, you know, we need their time, we need their treasurer, they're taking both away and saying, "We're packing up our lunchbox and going home."

So that was tough.

But at the end of the day, if I had to use a phrase or, you know, it's all about relationships, Steve.

That's what saved me, that's what saved the chamber, and that's always been in my life.

I'm a big proponent that you need to, you know, nurture your relationships.

There's a friend of mine named Ted Rubin who says, you know, relationships are the new currency.

So instead of ROI, he likes to say ROR, return on relationship.

- Yeah, your friend's a smart guy because Mary and I have built this organization through our relationships and also our relationships with a great team that we have.

Go ahead, Mary.

- It's funny you mentioned relationships, Carlos, with our new up and coming leaders, our younger 20 something leaders, Steve has sons in their 20s, I have two sons, a 20 and a 23-year-old.

How do you recommend to these young leaders up and coming to build relationships when so much of what they do is just like we're doing right now, on Zoom, on Teams, and how do you build relationships, and on the phone, in this type of format?

- I'm not shy, Mary.

So like, I have a 22-year-old daughter who you'll see on that episode.

She joins me on the Father's Day episode, so.

She wants to be a Broadway performer in musical theater so I'm just like.

- Oh my, Carlos.

- Go ahead, Mary.

- My son is at NYU Tisch right now studying to be an actor.

- So we have to have a coffee with the kids.

- Definitely.

- My daughter graduated Marymount Manhattan in musical theater.

- Congrats.

- So she comes on the show.

I've introduced her to, you know, Mandy Gonzalez from Broadway, Christopher Jackson.

So she's met some really great people.

So it's just, I really, I'm aggressive with her.

I'm like, you have to come to this cocktail party with me because you're gonna meet a producer that could perhaps open a door for you.

But I do struggle with the 20 something year olds are so different than the three of us that are on camera right now.

I mean, it's such a different world.

They don't build relationships, it's all digital.

So I think there's a big disconnect in that generation.

But those that can embrace it are gonna, there's no stopping them.

You know, like Steve's kids automatically having Steve as a dad, they're gonna have networks, they're gonna know how to network - Or they don't want their dad getting involved.

- Or, and my wife Jennifer watches occasionally.

Jen, I know you accuse me of trying to micromanage our kids' lives, which is a euphemism for Nick, Chris, Olivia, my older son, Steven, here's what you need to do.

You need to call so and so.

"No, I'm gonna text him."

No, you need to call so and so and have a real conversation.

They don't know what they don't know.

And I know they push back, but Carlos, this is a leadership and parenting question.

Do we let them fail, or fall, however it's gonna play out, even when we know that they need to do this thing?

We're not trying to control them, but help them understand that it isn't all digital and texting is not talking.

Go ahead- - I think we have to let 'em have a little stumble, Steve, you know, not a long fall from a high building, but I think occasionally you have to let them, my daughter is my personality.

So she's so stubborn that if I tell her I think automatically she already has an inclination to say no just because it's coming outta my mouth.

So I have to let her organically come to the same conclusion by supporting her as best I can.

But yeah, it's a challenge.

(chuckles) - Carlos, I've said to Steve a million times, I said, "You need to let them fail."

If you always are there to catch them, as long as it's nothing ethical, immoral, illegal, dangerous, let them fail because if not, they're not gonna learn if you're always there to just scoop 'em right up.

- All right, so, stop talking about my issues with my kids.

All right, Mary, last question.

- Carlos, I did read a lot, we do our research before these shows, and you are a self-professed storyteller.

Where did your passion come from?

I mean, we just saw it now for the past nine, 10 minutes, where does your passion for storytelling, because at the way beginning of this segment, you shared that you get nervous sometimes with public speaking, but you're also a storyteller.

Where does that connection come from?

- Yeah, it's a weird conflict that I experience.

Dad was an amazing storyteller, to the point that as he was getting older and his memory was failing, some people might like in a party come and say, "Save me, your dad's told me this story 100 times."

So I then become a little, I'm conscious like, be careful, Carlos, you don't wanna be.

So then I kind of become more, you know, retrospective.

I become a little more inward and I'm not as aggressive, 'cause I'm like, wait, I don't want to be harassing folks.

But I love storytelling, I loved hearing dad's stories and the way, you know, he could command the crowd and people would just circle him and appreciate his knowledge, it was always...

It's just a rush that I can't explain when you have a good conversation with somebody.

- Hey, Carlos, you're doing important work at the chamber, the statewide Hispanic Chamber of Commerce and also with "Que Pasa" New Jersey, seen with our great friends and broadcast partners, NJ PBS.

And go online, it'll be up one more time so people will see past episodes.

Carlos, wishing you and your team all the best.

Thank you.

- Great, thank you.

- You got it.

Stay with us, we'll be right back.

- [Narrator] One-On-One with Steve Adubato is a production of the Caucus Educational Corporation.

Funding has been provided by New Jersey Sharing Network.

Hackensack Meridian Health.

United Airlines.

Kean University.

Newark Board of Education.

PSEG Foundation.

Eastern Atlantic States Regional Council of Carpenters.

The New Jersey Economic Development Authority.

And by Operating Engineers, Local 825.

Promotional support provided by NJ.Com.

And by New Jersey Globe.

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