[♪♪♪] -Welcome to Cookin' Cheap outdoors.

-Uh-huh.

We're at Doris and Harold's-- -And Harold's place.

And a little bit later on, we're going to be telling you the actual address.

-Right.

-.of Doris and Harold.

And you're all invited over this evening for a big lasagna meal.

-Ooh, [indistinct].

Good.

-It's gonna be wonderful.

She's prepared for several thousand people to show up right here.

-Oh, good, yeah.

We'll tell you exactly how to get here.

[laughs] -She thinks we're kidding.

-No, I-- -But we're not, of course.

-Oh, no, no, no.

-Anyway, no, I have a little sign with their address on it.

We'll pull it out-- -[laughs] And we left bread crumbs.

This is the most complicated place to get to in the history of the world.

-It is.

Johnson and I started out at six o'clock this morning, I think it was.

And we're just getting here right about now.

This is called Picnic at the Lake, and there's the lake way back there somewhere.

-[Laban] Down there behind us.

It's a beautiful place.

-[Larry] You might be able to catch a glance of it.

If you don't, use your imagination.

We'll make gurgling noises.

-[Laban] And we're going to-- -It's beautiful out here.

-[Laban] Oh, it is.

It's gorgeous.

-[Larry] It's lovely.

And we're on a deck out here.

-Oh, it just feels so good and it's lovely.

Doris has lots of flowers around.

A lot of perennials-- -[Larry] Bark.

A lot of dirt, bark, leaves.

-[Laban] And Bly-- -[Larry] Huh?

-[Laban] We may be attacked.

You know, every time we do these outdoor shows, we've either got tourists or animals that don't like us, for whatever reason.

And there are pileated woodpeckers in the neighborhood.

-Oh, my.

-So I fear for your wooden head.

-And I've got that wooden place in my head that had to be replaced a few years ago.

-Well, we thought since we were at the lake-- and this is Smith Mountain Lake, the largest lake in Virginia-- that we would do some fish today and other fishy things.

And of course, a lot of you know that we're fishy anyway.

-I didn't realize that the fish came in bags like that.

-Oh, yeah, yeah.

You catch it and then you throw it in.

This is some catfish.

That's right.

And I'm mary-anatin' it.

-[Larry chuckles] As they love to say-- -.in the bag.

[Larry] --here in southwest Virginia.

-You don't have to put your fish fillets or whatever you wanna marinate in a bowl, you know.

You can put 'em in a plastic bag, and this one works just fine.

Let me tell you what I'm doin' with my marinade.

I'm using the juice of a lemon.

which I have freshly squoze several hours ago, and poured it down into the fish.

A quarter cup of olive oil.

This is pretty good olive oil here.

And some salt.

-Virgin?

-I didn't use a whole lot of salt, but some salt.

And no, it's not virgin.

It's-- I'm sorry.

-It's pure, though.

-But it's very pure, right.

-And that's all that matters.

[laughs] -And I used several grinds of pepper.

-Ooh.

-And that's all you have to do.

And you really only need to let this fish marinate for a couple of hours, two or three, and it will be ready to grill.

So that's what we're gonna-- I'm gonna grill this fish, and let's see if we can pull this one off, Bly.

-All right.

-All right.

Now, I'll put this down to soak up that-- -It sounds like one of the little critters has a cold.

-Uh-huh.

Somebody's barking over there.

-Somebody barking in the background.

-This is our fish thang.

-Well, that's what you were chasing me around with a while ago through the woods here.

-Uh-huh, yeah, look-- -No!

How terrible!

That could put out my eye.

-Oh, I swear, you worry more about having.

-I do.

-.somebody putting out your eye.

-You want me to hold it for you?

-No, that's all right.

-[laughs] I do.

I'm real concerned about my eyes.

-Had you ever noticed that before, how many times you talk about putting out your eye?

-No.

No.

About as many times as you start singing on the show, probably, which is quite frequently.

-[laughs] -While we're talking about tics.

-You were talking about that woman this mornin' that didn't have a sausage biscuit that wanted to put out my eye because I asked.

-[laughs] Oh.

-Now, the onliest thing is-- [laughs] -The onliest thing is what?

-You have to roll your bag down, otherwise you get your sleeve oily.

-And that's such a pretty sleeve, too.

-Uh-huh, it is.

-You know, we kind of match today.

We didn't even.

-Do we?

Yeah.

-.get together on it.

-Uh-uh.

We're gonna put our little catfishy fillets-- -Oh, the first bug is already after us.

-Some of these-- [Larry] Well, those are fine-lookin' fillets.

-Mm-hm, they are indeed.

And we're layin' them on this little fish thing.

And you almost have to have this when you're-- -What, a fish?

-When you're barbecuin' fish, you got to have the right thing.

-[Larry] Stuff.

-You got to have the right utensil.

The right stuff.

Ooh.

oily and lemony.

All right now, flip that baby down.

And we'll pick this now.

-Now, isn't that beautiful.

-And if, you know, and the nice thing about it is if you want to, and you know, you need the exercise and everything, you can play badminton with the-- [laughs] I thought you-- and you just plop it right down there on the grill.

[Larry] Ooh, it's good and hot.

-Fiery hot, fiery hot.

-[Larry] Fiery hot.

How long does that have to do that?

-How long?

-[Larry] How long?

-Tell it-- oh, I'm sorry.

-[Larry scoffs] -About-- no.

[laughs] You have to do it until it's done, fool.

-How do you know that?

-What?

-Well, there are a lot of folks out there in TV lant that don't know that.

-Oh, well, you can kind of punch on it with your finger.

-[scoffs] Punch on it?

-Just, no, just goose it a little bit and you can tell if it's done.

If it's-- you know, you don't wanna cook 'til it flakes 'cause that sometimes, it's overdone.

But you can punch at it and kind of tell and if it feels done and doesn't feel springy, you know-- well, I'll show you.

-Is that it?

-Well, it's enough.

[laughs] -Oh.

[laughs] -Show us what you're gonna do with those radishes.

-I'm gonna do the strangest cucumber salad I think I have ever seen.

It is right bizarre.

And the first thing I have to do is take four green onions and I need to cut them into one-inch lengths.

But first, I need to clean 'em up a little bit 'cause they look right ratty.

You know, the trip up here just took hours.

These were fresh-- oh, here it is.

-Here it is.

-There we are.

Harold has provided le crock trash can.

-[laughs] It's got that little alligator right on the side of it.

-It kind of sort of looks like Johnson's hair.

And you're gonna trim those off a little bit.

-Oh.

-By the way, you got your hair cut for this, didn't you?

-I did, yeah.

-I noticed you did.

Last time I saw you, you looked like Frank Zappa before he got his hair cut.

-I went down to our hair cutter, Mr. Steve.

- The old hair cutter.

[laughs] -Tells you everything you don't wanna know.

-Down on Hair Court Drive.

-Uh-huh.

[chuckles] -All right, four of 'em.

What I always like to do when I'm preparing.

these little fresh onions is take some of the outside of it off because especially since it has tons of dirt on it.

I don't need those two.

Sacrificial onions.

You have to have some.

I always just take the outside off.

You know, we used to go out in the garden, and this is all you'd do.

You'd never-- is it something personal?

Is it my deodorant?

What is it?

-Probably.

[chuckles] -Anyway, I get along pretty good with the bees.

It's the birds I'm worried about.

Anyway, you used to go out in the garden and just take off just the outside and eat 'em, right in the garden.

But then, don't expect to get any dates.

'cause nobody wants to be around you after you've had a couple of these spring onions.

Are they done yet, Laban?

-Oh, no, but it's doing real good.

Real good.

-[scoffs] Well, they sure do smell good.

-Mm-hm.

-That must be somethin' that Doris is cooking.

[laughs] All right, you cut these into one-inch lengths.

One-inch lengths.

[indistinct].

Now, it doesn't say, do you go all the way to the-- I assume you go to right about there.

-I'd go to there.

-Yeah.

I know you've been there before.

-Because these are kind of, you know, buggered up down here on this end.

They don't look too good.

-About one inch lengths.

-[Laban] Uh-huh.

-This is a funny salad, and you'll find out why it's funny in a couple of seconds.

Yeah, I don't think I'm gonna go any further.

-That's right, yeah.

-I've gone as far as I'm gonna go.

[chuckles] Now, what you do with these is you take these four onions in the one-inch lengths, and you throw them into a big pan.

And you put some salt upon them, about a quarter of a teaspoon-- I'm just gonna make it up.

And then you know what you have to do?

-You got Tupperware salt things.

-What you have to do then is you have to take the onions and the salt, and you have to smash 'em.

-Uh-huh, hurt 'em.

-Beat 'em into oblivion.

And I'm not sure how this is gonna work.

I think I'll try it this way.

This has got to be the strangest recipe, Laban, I have ever seen in my life.

And so, that's what I'm gonna be doin' for the next couple minutes, is smashing these onions all up.

And they haven't done anything to me; it's nothing personal.

-But you're just gonna get the full flavor out of 'em that way.

-Yeah, I think you're right.

-Okay.

-[laughs] If I can ever get hold of 'em.

-Let's check and see how the fish is doin'.

-Oh, yes, check the fish, Johnson, 'cause I'll be doing this for a week.

-Well, I'm gonna turn them over.

Oh, it looks like it's doing great.

And they're not done yet.

-Does it really or are you just saying that to be polite?

-No, no, they're doing great.

They're doing terrific, couldn't be better.

Now I'm gonna make a little sauce to go on 'em I'll work on.

-Oh, thank goodness.

I thought that was the end of his recipe.

-No, no, no, no.

-I thought I was gonna be smashing onions for the next half hour.

-Now, I've gotta cream some-- -This is dumb.

-Are you having a hard time?

-Well, they're slippery and they keep flying around.

I'm afraid-- -Well, maybe you could use your chive jar and just kind of stomp them like that.

-That's a great idea.

-Now, I've got some anchovies here.

-Did I wash this?

Sure I did.

Hey, that's great.

That's workin' real well.

-Oh, this can-- -I wish I'd've thought of it myself.

-I got to open up this can of anchovies.

I hope I can do it.

-Oh, no, not anchovies.

On a picnic, on the deck?

I can't escape anchovies.

-Well, I don't need but just one.

-What are you gonna do with the rest of 'em?

-What?

-Why don't you feed 'em to Doris and Harold?

-Well.

you know, they do have some cats here.

I just hope I can get 'em out.

-How long do you reckon I need to smash these things?

-Well, I think you're gettin' real good at it there.

Now, let me see if I can get an anchovy out of here.

-A mortar and pestle would have been extremely good for this, I think.

-All right, that's-- well, let me just get one other little piece here.

of this anchovy, out of this can.

And I'll put these anchovies over here and maybe the kitties later on would like to have some.

-The kitties will definitely wanna be in line for those.

-Now, I've got the-- -Mm, they smell so good.

-Now, I've got to have some lemon juice in here.

And I've got about one anchovy fillet and a half a stick of margarine.

And I'm gonna-- I need a-- just a little bit of lemon juice.

So-- [clattering] [Larry humming] -All right, that's about a teaspoon of lemon juice.

That's enough.

And I'm gonna need a little bit of cayenne pepper.

So, that's about a pinch worth of cayenne.

And now, with a stout wooden spoon.

I've got to mash all of this together.

So you and I are both having to mash.

-Well, I finished my mashin'.

The great masher has stopped.

I am now just taking care of a cucumber.

I'm getting all of the outsides off it and throwin' it all over Doris and Harold's deck and just having a good time.

One of our camera people has been overcome by fish smoke.

-Oh, it is going right that way and-- -It's going right up in there.

-Well, you know what they say about smoke following something.

[laughs] -[laughs] Did [indistinct] to the sailors.

-Uh-huh.

Oh, me.

-The sunset, that's what we're talking about.

Smoke always follows the sunset.

-Oh, look-- now, Bly.

-[Larry] What?

-[Laban] If you look over here at the fish, you wanna know how they're done.

See, if you punch it a little bit like that and you can just kind of tell when it's-- no, you don't poke.

You use your hand; you push on it a little bit.

And if it just kind of springs, it-it's done.

I would say that fish is right on it.

-I think it's almost done.

Every time you punch it, I spring.

-Right on it.

-Boy, it's smelling good, though.

It really is.

-Mm-hm.

Now, I gotta go back over here and cream my butter and anchovies and lemon juice and cayenne.

[Larry humming] -Oh, boy, that looks good.

-[Larry] Doesn't it though?

It looks like a fresh sprang one but it's not.

-Uh-oh, was that somebody's stomach roaring over there?

[laughs] -[laughs] Someone's stomach has done gotten away from them.

[hums] -Now, you really have to work at this.

This would have worked better if I had anchovy paste.

I would have used-- oh, don't knock it over.

Please, anything but that.

-Excuse me.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

All right, now, what I got to do is just one real quick thing and then we'll go back to your anchovies paste or whatever it is.

-Okay.

-I have to take an entire lemon and squeeze it in here.

-Would you want to use my juicer?

-And mix that-- yes!

I didn't know you had one.

Well, isn't that wonderful?

It's delightful.

-Uh-huh.

[Larry] No seeds today, boys and girls.

And I'm just gonna squeeze an entire lemon into this mess.

Now, this is the pulpy, squished up, messy onions.

It seems like one whole-- it says juice of a lemon.

That may seem excessive to me, but that's what it says.

I kinda like this, 'cause at least I'm getting my hands clean finally.

[Laban] Mm-hm.

[Larry] With this lemon juice.

[Laban] Well, we're gonna need it after this fish.

[Larry] [grunts] There we go.

And you gotta mix that around real well.

I got one seed in there, I need to get it out.

There it is.

And just mix it around, which is what we're doing right now.

-And I'm continuing to run my seasoned anchovy butter in this little metal pan with my wooden spoon, whipping it and blending it until it goes completely crazy.

-Oh, Laban, doesn't that just look real swell.

-Oh, it does.

-Oh, yeah, sure.

-Actually, it does look good.

-Oh, does it really?

-Mm-hm.

-[chuckles] Okay, if you say so.

Now, what I gotta do is I gotta start peeling very thinly my large cuke, and we'll be doing that right now.

And that's gonna get added to that.

-[Laban] Okay.

-So next thing I gotta do is I've got to take my cukes and peel them thinly, slice them thinly.

-Oh.

-So that's what I'm gonna do right now.

Real thinly, you don't want them to be too long.

Now, if you see anything excess there, you'll know it's the end of my finger.

But I'm trying to be real careful.

You know anymore, I practically always, and I'm not doing it here today 'cause, well, I just don't feel like it, but what I do most any times anymore is I cut a cucumber in half and spoon out all of the seeds.

-[Laban] The seeds, uh-huh.

[Larry] I very seldom ever do this anymore just like this.

But it's what it says to do, and that's what I'm going to do.

So, that's gonna take me a little bit.

How's your fish coming along?

-[Laban] It's done.

-They do smell wonderful.

-It's done, and I'm gonna start putting some plates over here on the table while you're working on that.

-Well, that's terrific.

This is gonna take a little bit because I have to do it thinly, and because I have to do it thinly, I have to be a little more careful and tedious with it.

But they are real pretty.

I think this is gonna be a very interesting salad.

I'm gonna have sour cream in it.

It should be real nice.

Oh, Johnson just toppled over into the fire.

Well, that's all right.

Just flip him over in 15 minutes.

[scoffs] He's doing real well with the fish.

I'm real proud of it 'cause on the way up here this morning, he was just real nervous about it.

-[Laban] Oh.

-[Larry] [chuckles] Well, Lord, someone's blowing someone out of the woods back there.

Is it hunting season?

There's no hunting season.

-[man] Not yet.

-[Larry] Not yet.

-They're building something over there.

-Oh, is that what they're doing?

It sounds like they're shooting a house.

A lot of noise.

All right, well, we're coming along here.

Little patience, I'll be finished in just a second.

Then, we'll get to some more of the exciting parts of this fine-- you know, a good salad does take a little bit.

-Oh, sure.

If you do it right.

-If you do it right, that's right.

You can't hurry a salad.

-You can't hurry the fish either, getting it off the grill.

-And why is that?

-Well, I just had a little trouble [indistinct].

-[scoffs] What's wrong?

Did it all fall on the deck?

-No, no, no, no.

It's fine.

It's fine.

-Oh, okay.

-You know, I have had a history of having fish problems.

-I know you have, that one that fell apart on the air.

Okay, all that goes into the bowl, real thinly sliced, goes into the bowl, into the bowl.

Next thing we have to do now is a bunch of radishes thinly sliced.

I figure we'll be here another week.

-You need me to help you?

-Yes, if you'd like to.

I would-- you know, I got a bunch of them.

I don't think we need every one of them.

We'll just take what we can.

And they need to be wiped off a little bit, I do believe.

I think they should have been-- -[Laban] Oh, they are corrupt.

-Yes, they are.

We could have afforded to have a little water and I forgot to ask for it.

-Here.

-That's all right, we'll do all right.

There's no problem.

No problem.

-Wait a minute.

Let me just run it over here in my little lemon washer.

-Well, that's a good idea.

Well, you know, you can take these things right-- and don't get squeamish on me, ladies and gentlemen-- you can take these things right out of the ground and eat 'em if you want to.

But of course, you gotta like grit to do it that way.

-And you have those fanatical people out there that get real upset if you don't wash everything.

-Yeah, that's right.

[Laban] I saw a lady the other day that even washed the little trays that the chicken came in.

-[Larry] Oh, for heaven's sake.

I'm gonna tell you something that's gonna shock you all.

This stuff was under dirt.

[man] Here's the water.

-Oh.

-Before I got here today.

Thank you very much.

Isn't that sweet?

Our staff has come through with some wah-wah.

-And we're just-- -And I'm just gonna throw those in there.

Bathe them a little bit.

-[Laban] Oh!

[Larry] Throw them right in there.

Supposed to do a bunch of them, it seems excessive to me.

We're just gonna do as many as we feel like doing.

-[chuckles] Well, you're just very excessive yourself.

-[laughs] I'm sorry.

I do what I wanna do on this show.

I hope I won't get fired, but if I do, that's the chance I have to take.

-Uh-huh.

-I'm willing to take.

-Where is that woodpecker?

-You know I am a big chance taker.

Oh, I put the wrong thing in.

-Where is that woodpecker when we need it?

-I don't know.

-Let me see.

Can I go faster over here like this?

-[laughs] This is a right slow process and I'm sorry.

If we'd've had your little slicer that you got [indistinct]-- -[Laban] That little mandolin.

[Larry] --that would have really done the job, wouldn't it?

You'd avoid all of this because you gotta get these things done fairly thin, too.

And it takes time.

-Well, now, here we go.

We're getting it there.

[chuckles] -Who is that talking?

-I don't know.

-There's somebody has wandered in from the woods.

-Did somebody just-- oh, okay.

They were signifying to us again.

-What are they signifying now?

-Well, it was a palm held up with five outstretched fingers.

-[Larry scoffs] -So we know that that indicates five minutes.

Where we get in trouble is when in just a few seconds, they start giving us the palms up with less than five fingers.

-Why don't we show them the recipes while we're doing-- -[Laban] Oh, okay.

[Larry] --this dull part?

You wanna do yours first?

-[Laban] Well, yeah, sure.

I'll be glad to.

The Grilled Fish, you can use whole filleted fish or fish steaks.

Then marinate the fish for three hours in a marinade composed of a quarter cup of good olive oil, two tablespoons of freshly squeezed lemon juice, a teaspoon of salt and several hearty grinds of pepper.

Then, make a little butter for the fish after it's cooked out of a quarter cup of butter or margarine, creamed until soft, a teaspoon of anchovy paste or one anchovy fillet, a quarter teaspoon of lemon juice, and a pinch of cayenne pepper.

[Larry] Now, the Cucumber Salad, you start out with four green onions, and you know, make sure you clean them up real good like I did, and you cut them into one-inch lengths and you smush them with a quarter of a teaspoon of salt.

And then you add the juice of an entire fresh lemon, and you mix that all around.

And then, you add a large cuke, peeled and thinly sliced, a bunch of radishes thinly sliced, which we're still doing, a half a cup of sour cream and a tablespoon of chopped chives to garnish with.

And then you got it one time, baby.

So anyway, that's that.

Let me set that down over here.

-I'm sorry.

-Okay.

Now, what we gotta do is add our sour cream to this mess.

-Mm.

-Well, isn't that the most unusual thing you've ever seen?

-Looks like one of those coffee cup lids.

-Half a cup.

I don't wanna overdo it.

You reckon that's a half a cup?

-No, put a little bit more.

[Larry] The last time you complained I put too much.

And we're gonna toss that around a little bit.

I don't think that's much of a toss.

Smush it around a bit.

It doesn't seem to be doing much.

Ooh, but it smells good.

Ooh, and it's real pretty, too.

And then we will garnish it with some chives.

I'm gonna put some of those on top.

And I've got my little soup bowl-- -[Laban] Well, you could just-- why don't you just-- -[Larry] Oh, well.

I won't have to clean those up.

-Here's our plate with our fish on it and you can just give us a little section of the salad there.

-Looks quite appropriate for the fish dish, don't you think?

-Mm-hm.

-It's very lovely.

It's pretty.

I'm almost impressed with this operation today.

But then I always am.

-Well, there you are.

Here is your plastic outside fork.

-Oh, mm.

[chuckles] -So here is our catfish filet.

Oh, boy.

Try this [indistinct].

-Hm, it does smell wonderful.

[Laban] Mm-mm-mm.

-Mm.

Laban, that is wonderful.

-Ooh, the fish is so good.

-Ooh.

-And if you had that little basket, which is a very cheap thing-- -Mm-mm-mm.

-I bought that at a bargain store for under two dollars.

-A bargain.

And you know what?

This stuff goes pretty well with it, too-- the Cucumber Salad.

-Mm-hm.

-It's real oniony.

And it's just real perfect for sort of topping off the fish.

-Well, Larry, I think we've hit upon something that anybody-- even Doris and Harold-- would be privilege and pleased to serve at their lovely home.

-I would suggest they try this on their deck as soon as we clear out, which we don't intend to do for the next couple of hours because we're gonna hang around for lunch or whatever.

Mm-mm-mm.

I'm telling you, it's real good.

-Mm-mm, extra tasty.

-These two really do complement each other and it's quite lovely.

It's a very lovely presentation with a little red and the green and the chives in there.

And you know, I love that paste you've got on top of it.

That's great.

-Mm-mm.

Even if it does have anchovy in it.

-Yeah, it's a very subtle anchovy taste.

-Because we didn't use too much.

Well, we're glad that we could be at Doris and Harold Ford's house today, and I guess we're glad, I'm sure we are, as a matter of fact, that you could be with us-- -For the most part.

-visiting here in the wonderful out of doors where you can cook cheap just the way you can inside.

-Come back again.

Bye.

[♪♪♪]