ú- When I work with victims, it's, you know, providing that validation and explaining to them, you know, it's not just physical.

I think there's this stigma that when it comes to domestic violence, that it's just, that it's everything that you see exterior wise.

No one thinks about the interior of what it does.

That's how I made it to where I am now is because of the support I had from my friends and family.

So if I can provide that support, then I can help break that cycle that any victim of domestic violence may be in.

My name is Deanna Reder, and I am the legal advocate for our Dabinoo'igan Domestic Violence Shelter.

A lot of the victims I work with, they feel so less than, and not even human anymore because the abuser has pretty much stripped away whatever dignity or hope that they may have.

When I speak with an anonymous caller, for example, they'll describe their situation to me and then almost question themselves if it was abuse, just because it wasn't physical.

I witnessed an experience that psychological abuse and that emotional and verbal abuse from seeing my mom and her partners take advantage of her.

I still talk with my mom about it, and I think that's what helps her and both of us heal and talking about the past and what we experienced.

I try not to use my experience on other victims because it's their own story.

It's their own experience.

And no experience is the same because of my experience, it allows me to relate and provide that empathy that's needed.

Growing up.

there is definitely resentment towards my mom.

Unfortunately, even that, that feeling of hate, like just wanting to escape and leave.

I love my mom, it was always just me and her, her and I. I sometimes felt like I was the protector and keeping her safe because I didn't put up with her abusers at all.

If anything, I was the one that was always challenging them.

And that's actually what led to my mom and I arguing because I didn't, I stood my ground and I would call them out on their BS, all of that, those, those kinds of arguments put a strain on our relationship where I wouldn't talk to my mom a lot while I was in the house, I would just go to my room, go to school.

If anything, I think that's what motivated me to do so well in high school, I was involved in student council, National Honor Society.

I played tennis and I would purposefully sign up for all these events and for all these groups, just so I wouldn't have to be home.

I had just graduated from college.

I moved back home to Vegas and I thought, that's where I want to be.

But Vegas, the environment was no longer healthy for me emotionally, mentally, and that I needed my own fresh start.

And I was very fortunate to have family provide that support.

And, that's why I moved to Superior and kind of do that self discovery and find out who I am as a person.

What I want to do.

Being a legal advocate here in a sense has allowed me to heal.

And I think even educate me further.

And it provided me with that language and that terminology of what the dynamics are of domestic violence.

By having a culturally specific DV shelter, we're creating that space to help break that cycle of violence.

And we understand the historical trauma that the native community experienced.

So having that knowledge helps us better serve native women who are victims of violence, not blaming the victim.

I think we'll be one of the many steps moving forward as to breaking the cycle.

Because a lot of times there is Victim-blaming, like the big popular questions.

Well, why didn't you leave?

Or what did you do to make him mad, him or her mad?

And so a lot of that gets put back onto the victim when they are literally the victim of the crime, of the assault.

I'm looking forward to starting law school in the fall.

Once I graduate, then I'll be able to take the bar exam and practice and work with victims of violence.

See, I say it as if it's easy peasy, I know it's not going to be easy, but, it's going to be worth it.

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