(female announcer) PRODUCTION COSTS FOR RARE VISIONS AND ROADSIDE REVELATIONS HAVE BEEN PAID FOR IN PART BY SPRINT, COMMITTED TO THE COMMUNITY, CONNECTING YOU TO THE WORLD.

(man) ♪ WELCOME TO A SHOW ABOUT THINGS YOU CAN SEE ♪ ♪ WITHOUT GOING FAR, AND A LOT OF THEM ARE FREE.

♪ ♪ IF YOU THOUGHT THERE WAS NOTHING IN THE OLD HEARTLAND, ♪ ♪ YOU OUGHT TO HIT THE BLACKTOP ♪ ♪ WITH THESE FOOLS IN A VAN.

♪ ♪ LOOK OUT, THEY'RE DRIVING HARD, ♪ ♪ CHECKING OUT ART IN THEIR OWN BACKYARD.

♪ ♪ RANDY DOES THE STEERING SO HE WON'T HURL.

♪ ♪ MIKE'S GOT THE MAP, SUCH A MAN OF THE WORLD.

♪ ♪ THAT'S DON WITH THE CAMERA, ♪ ♪ KIND OF HEAVY ON HIS SHOULDER.

♪ ♪ AND THAT GIANT BALL OF TAPE, IT'S A WORLD RECORD HOLDER.

♪ ♪ LOOK OUT, THEY'RE DRIVING HARD, ♪ ♪ CHECKING OUT ART IN THEIR OWN BACKYARD.

♪ ♪ LOOK OUT, THEY'RE DRIVING HARD, ♪ ♪ CHECKING OUT THE WORLD IN THEIR OWN BACKYARD, ♪ ♪ CHECKING OUT THE WORLD IN THEIR OWN BACKYARD.

♪ ♪ MOM?

IT'S LIKE A NIGHTMARE.

I MEAN, IT'S LIKE THAT MOVIE GROUNDHOG DAY.

EVERY DAY, I WAKE UP, AND I'M IN THE CAR WITH THESE SAME GUYS.

(Don) DEAR TV MAIL BAG, WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH MIKE'S MOM?

HI, DON THE CAMERA GUY, HERE, AND I KNOW SHE THINKS WE SHOULD SPEND MORE TIME SHOWING WHERE WE'VE GONE INSTEAD OF HOW WE GOT THERE.

BUT WHERE WE'RE GOING RIGHT NOW IS THE LITTLE TOWN OF DEARBORN, JUST NORTH OF K.C., TO FIND RHETT JOHNSON.

RHETT USED TO WORK AT THE AIRPORT TILL A FEW YEARS AGO WHEN HE GOT LAID OFF, CUT BACK, AND MORE OR LESS DOWNSIZED TO THE POINT WHERE HE DECIDED HE'D RATHER MAKE ART FULL-TIME INSTEAD.

THAT WOULD BE ART FROM IRONING BOARDS AND COFFEEPOTS AND OTHER STANDARD HOUSEHOLD DEBRIS, PIECES THAT HE PUTS TOGETHER IN STOCKPILES IN HIS OLD LODGE DOWNTOWN, WITH HIS WIFE, KELLY'S BEADWORK ON DISPLAY IN THE FRONT.

UNTRAINED BUT NEVER LACKING FOR IDEAS, RHETT ACTUALLY DOES HIS WORK ON THE FAMILY FARM AT THE EDGE OF TOWN.

(Rhett) I GREW UP ON THIS FARM, AND I STARTED MAKING STUFF, EVEN AS A KID.

AND I STARTED-- I CAN REMEMBER FOR SURE-- I'LL PUT A DATE TO IT, AND I WAS, PROBABLY, 12 YEARS OLD WHEN I STARTED CARVING.

AND FOR SO MANY, MANY YEARS, I CHASED THAT FIX, BUT THIS BECAME SO MUCH MORE REWARDING TO TAKE PURITY JUNK AND MAKE SOMETHING OUT OF IT.

THE CHALLENGING PART ABOUT IT IS FIGURING OUT HOW TO ATTACH IT OR HOW TO CONNECT IT, AND IF CAN CLAIM ANY ABILITY, I WOULD SAY I CAN CERTAINLY CONNECT THINGS TOGETHER.

(Mike) TRICYCLE OF TERROR, PERHAPS.

(Rhett) YES, IT HAD ORIGINALLY STARTED OUT TO BE MECHANICAL, AND I HAD A MOTOR ON IT.

BUT WHEN I STARTED IT UP, IT GOT PRETTY WILD AND WAS CONSIDERABLY DANGEROUS, MORE DANGEROUS THAN I HAD HOPED, SO I DISCONNECTED THE MOTOR.

AND THIS IS KIND OF A LITTLE BIT OF THE THINGS THAT I DO, INCORPORATING A MIXTURE OF ALL THINGS: TIRES FROM THE ROAD AND PIECES AND PARTS.

I NEVER COME OUT HERE WITH ANY PRECONCEIVED IDEA OF WHAT I'M GOING TO MAKE.

I JUST PICK UP SOMETHING AND START, AND YOU ADD THIS TO THAT.

BUT IF I'M CONCENTRATING ON WORKING ON WOOD, THEN I'LL WORK IN THIS SECTION, WHERE THERE'S A LOT OF THAT, OR I'LL MOVE ALL THE BOXES OF WOOD AND LAY THEM OUT.

THAT'S THE BAD THING.

YOU JUST DRAG IN SO MUCH STUFF, AND YOU RUN OUT OF SPACE.

WE'RE LIKE TWO KIDS WITH NO MOM TO SAY NO.

WE'RE NOT GOOD FOR EACH OTHER THAT WAY BECAUSE WE JUST KEEP ADDING TO THE PILES, AND IT DOESN'T BOTHER US.

(Mike) A LOT OF THEM HAVE TITLES.

(Rhett) YES, MM-HMM.

(Mike) MOST OF THEM?

(Rhett) YEAH, THIS IS CALLED THE LUNCH LINE, MOST EVERYTHING I DO HAS A TITLE.

AND THIS GUY IS CALLED ONE-- HE'S MADE OUT OF AN ICE BUCKET, AND THIS IS CALLED ON E KNIGHT OF PASSION.

KILLER BEES, MADE OUT OF-- USING DARNING NEEDLES FOR STINGERS AND SOME MORE OF THE AVALON ROOF.

THIS IS AN AIRPLANE THAT I RECENTLY DID.

NOW, THAT'S DONE OUT OF OLD FAN BLADES AND A WOODEN CRUTCH, BUT I'VE GOT--HE HAS ALL OF HIS SUPPLIES, HIS CREDIT CARD, AND THE THINGS HE NEEDS FOR HIS TRIP.

WHEN THE KEMPER MUSEUM HAD THEIR PUTT-MODERNISM EXHIBIT, THIS WAS THE BACKDROP FOR THIS PIECE.

AND THEN THIS WAS TH E 19th HOLE, AND YOU DROPPED THE BALL IN.

[bells ringing] AND THEN AFTER I DID THAT PIECE THAT WORKED ON GOLF BALLS, I CREATED THIS PIECE THAT'S CALLED MADHOUSE.

AND THE MOTHER IS HIT ON THE HEAD WITH A CUP, AND SHE STARTS DISPENSING GOLF BALLS TO FEED THE CHILDREN.

THIS '50s ALUMINUM, I MEAN, WHEN YOU GO GARAGE SALING OR JUNKING OR WHATEVER TO FIND MATERIAL, THERE'S A LOT OF THIS, AND THERE'S SO MANY DIFFERENT PERSONALITIES IN COFFEEPOTS.

I MEAN, THERE'S SO MANY DIFFERENT LOOKS.

MY VIEW OF IT IS, "WHAT CAN IT BE?"

AND SO WHEN YOU TAKE SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE CAN RECOGNIZE AS WHAT IT USED TO BE AND WHEN YOU CHANGE IT AROUND, THEY, IMMEDIATELY, STILL SEE WHAT IT IS.

THAT'S WHAT I LIKE: ALL THIS LITTLE BITTY JUNK THAT HAS BEEN USED FOR SOME OTHER PURPOSE, LIKE IT'S BEEN SITTING IN A GARAGE OR A BASEMENT FOR 50 YEARS, IT'S REDISCOVERED.

AND YOU PUT IT TOGETHER, AND IT'S LIKE, ALL OF A SUDDEN, IT HAS JUST BEEN FOUND.

I'VE DONE IT ALL MY LIFE, AND IT WAS NEVER ABOUT MONEY.

ALL THE MONEY DOES FOR ME IS ALLOW ME TO CONTINUE, AND WHEN IT DOESN'T ALLOW ME TO CONTINUE, I'LL DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO FEED MYSELF.

BUT RIGHT NOW, THIS IS WORKING.

(Don) THOSE TV WEASELS WOULD HAVE BEEN HAPPY JUST TO GET THE FREE COFFEE, BUT THE JOHNSONS WENT ONE BETTER, PRESENTING US WITH THIS KING OF THE ROAD, SUITABLE FOR GRILLING.

(Rhett) I COULDN'T FIND A CHICKEN LEG, SO I JUST GAVE YOU THE WHOLE CHICKEN.

(Don) A LOT OF RHETT'S RAW MATERIALS COME FROM THE OLD STOCKYARDS IN ST. JOE, WHICH COINCIDENTALLY, IS WHERE WE'RE HEADING NEXT-- NOT THE STOCKYARDS, BUT THIS HISTORIC OLD TOWN ON THE MISSOURI RIVER.

(Mike) THERE'S ALL SORTS OF HISTORY HERE, AND WE'RE GOING TO IGNORE MOST ALL OF IT.

(Don) SURE ENOUGH, WE PASSED AND PASSED BY THE GLORE PSYCHIATRIC MUSEUM, HOUSED, IT SEEMED TO US, IN THE ALL-TOO-REAL McCOY.

(Randy) YEAH, IN FACT, THEY'D PROBABLY USE ALL THIS AS EVIDENCE TO KEEP US.

(Don) WE DID, HOWEVER, PAUSE TO ADMIRE THIS SHRINE TO FROZEN DAIRY PRODUCTS, WHICH HAD SEEN BETTER DAYS.

AND ON A SOMEWHAT MORE CLASSICAL NOTE, MADE OUR WAY TO MOUNT MORA CEMETERY'S MAUSOLEUM ROW.

(Mike) THAT'S GOT SOME BEAUTIFUL CARVING ON THE TOP.

(Don) WHERE THE CITY'S EARLIEST SETTLERS SPARED NO EXPENSE TO COMMEMORATE THEIR DEARLY DEPARTED...

THOUGH, ONCE AGAIN, IT APPEARS SOME TALENTED CARVER WAS PLAYING FAST AND LOOSE WITH HISTORICAL FACT.

BACK HERE, THE VANDERLINDE TOMB COMES WITH A STORY TOO.

(Mike) APPARENTLY, THEY WERE PASSING THROUGH TOWN ON THEIR WAY TO THE GREAT AMERICAN WEST, AND SHE DIED IN CHILDBIRTH.

AND THE GUY DIDN'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS HERE, AND HE DIDN'T KNOW ANYBODY.

SO HE BUILT THIS BRICK MAUSOLEUM FOR HER, BUT I GUESS HE GOT IN A LITTLE BIT OF A RUSH, 'CAUSE HE JUST LEFT HER LAYING IN THERE ON SOME SAWHORSES.

WELL, BUT I'M IMPRESSED THAT HE WAS JUST ON THE WAY THROUGH AND BUILT THIS LITTLE THING WHILE HE WAS PASSING BY.

I HATE TO SAY IT, BUT WHAT IF YOU WERE TO PASS ON THIS TRIP?

COULD YOU OR I, DON, WHIP TOGETHER A LITTLE MASONRY AND LEAVE MIKE?

SOMETHING OUT OF BROKEN BOTTLES WOULD BE NICE.

(Don) WE SHOULD LEAVE HIM IN THE COOLER.

AS IT TURNED OUT, NO ONE GOT LEFT BEHIND, AND IN SHORT ORDER, WE WERE HEADING OUT OF MISSOURI AND INTO NEBRASKA.

WHILE MIKE SNOOZED THE MILES AWAY, I SHARED THE FRONT SEAT IN A CHANCE TO REVIEW WITH RANDY WHAT WE'D LEARNED SO FAR.

(Randy) TH AT EVERY PLACE HA S SOME BAD BUGS: FIRE ANTS IN TEXAS.

YOU GOT YOUR SKEETERS.

YOU GOT TICKS, CHIGGERS.

PICK YOUR VERMIN.

[chuckles] I'LL PICK MINE.

(Don) YOU PICK YOUR VERMIN, AND IT WILL NEVER HEAL.

THE PLAN HAD BEEN TO BUZZ RIGHT THROUGH THIS SOUTHEAST CORNER OF THE STATE UNTIL SOMEONE POINTED OUT HOW THE TOWN OF BROCK ONCE HAD ANOTHER NAME, AND THAT NAME WAS PODUNK, WHICH LED TO THIS SHORT AND SHORTSIGHTED TRIP THROUGH ITS SLEEPY STREETS.

[Randy yells] HEY, DID THIS USED TO BE PODUNK?

(Don) MAYBE THEY'RE SAVING THEIR JOURNALISTIC SKILL FOR OUR LAST STOP OF THE DAY, WHICH LOOKS TO BE LINCOLN-- [dog barks] COLLEGE TOWN, STATE CAPITAL, AND HOME OF LOI VO, WHOSE EYE-CATCHING SCULPTURES START OUT AS AUTO PARTS.

YEAH, OUT OF CAR BUMPERS.

CAR BUMPERS?

CAR BUMPERS.

(Don) HE WORKS HERE, AT LINCOLN PLATING, AND IN NO TIME AT ALL HAD US WALKING AND TALKING AND-- boing FEELING RIGHT AT HOME.

(Loi) I KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF FORD BUMPERS IN HERE.

THERE'S ONE RIGHT THERE.

IN FACT, THEY JUST KEEP GOING.

ALL THOSE, FORD BUMPERS.

(Randy) WERE YOU THINKING BUMPERS FOR A PARTICULAR REASON OTHER THAN RECYCLING?

I MEAN, DO THEY MAKE A STATEMENT ABOUT ANYTHING?

IS THERE SOMETHING THAT TIES THEM TO EAGLES?

(Loi) UM, NO, IT'S, UM-- BECAUSE IT'S AVAILABLE FREE.

(Mike) HOW MUCH TIME DID YOU HAVE IN THAT?

OH, IT TOOK ME A YEAR.

(Randy) AND SO ALL THOSE YEARS OF ART SCHOOL, FOR YOU, FINALLY PAID OFF?

[Loi laughs] NO, I NEVER DID HAVE ANY KIND OF A TRAINING AT ALL.

I ALWAYS LIKE TO WELD AND, YOU KNOW, WORK WITH METAL.

SO THIS IS SOMETHING TO TEST MY SKILLS OUT.

(Randy) IS THIS BUMPERS?

(Loi) YEP, YEP.

THIS IS BUMPERS?

THIS IS MADE OF A DIFFERENT STYLE, ALL THE END OF THE BUMPERS, AND YOU CAN SEE A LOT OF BUMPERS THAT YOU CAN PROBABLY IDENTIFY.

(Randy) AN D YOU'VE WORKED AROUND HORSES ALL YOUR LIFE, SO YOU-- (Loi) NO, I STUDY--NO, I GOT MANY PI CTURES AND JUST STUDIED THEM.

WELL, IT'S NOT AS PERFECT AS I WANT IT TO BE, BUT YOU CAN'T BE PERFECT WHEN YOU'RE USING BUMPERS.

(Randy) WOULD YOU CONSIDER GI VING MIKE A WELDING LESSON?

(Mike) YEAH.

IT'S NOT VERY, VERY HARD.

MAN, IT IS DARK IN HERE.

(Randy) ARE YOU NERVOUS, MIKE?

YOU KNOW WE WOULDN'T EVER MA KE YOU DO ANYTHING DANGEROUS.

zap (Mike) MY HAND'S STUCK.

(Randy) YOU WELDED YOUR HAND TO IT!

(Mike) I WELDED MY HAND TO THE TABLE.

WELL, WHOSE IDEA WAS THIS?

(Loi) YEAH, A LITTLE BIT OF THE TIME LIKE THAT.

IF IT DOESN'T WORK, YOU JUST START OVER, AND YOU JUST DO-- WELL, YOU KNOW-- zap (Loi) I'M A JUNK COLLECTOR.

I COLLECT EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING.

WE GOT--OH, I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY BUMPER.

WE GOT A YARD FULL OF BUMPERS.

AND WHAT I LIKE IS SOMETHING LIKE THIS: HUGE.

I CAN PUT IT ON, AND IT'S A CURVE TO IT.

THIS IS A MONSTER BUMPER.

AND YOU CAN PUT IT ON SOMETHING, AND IT COVERS A BIG AREA, LIKE THE HORSE.

I DON'T NEED VERY MANY, YOU KNOW, TO MAKE SOMETHING.

BUT ALSO, IT'S CURVED AND IT MAKES A REAL GOOD SHAPE.

WELL, I WANT TO MAKE THIS INTO A SCULPTURES YARD.

I WANT TO MAKE A STATEMENT, SEE?

HERE, EVERYTHING'S BIG HERE.

IT'S A BIG FOOTBALL TEAM, A BIG THIS AND BIG THAT.

AND I SAY, "OKAY, WE GOT THE BIG GRASSHOPPER ALSO."

SO ANYWAY-- SO THE PRAYING MANTIS-- I ALWAYS KIND OF, YOU KNOW, LIKED THE WAY-- THE PRAYING--ANYTHING.

SO THAT'S WHY I--WELL-- WELL, YOU GOT TO MAKE SOMETHING THAT WILL EAT GRASSHOPPERS.

(Mike) WH AT ABOUT BIG BALLS OF TAPE?

BIG BALLS OF TAPE, THERE-- I DON'T--[laughs] THEY CAN PLAY WITH IT, YEAH.

MAYBE THEY'LL JUST KICK BACK AND FORTH.

cock-a-doodle-doo (Don) COME ON, LITTLE GUY.

I WONDER WHERE WE'RE GOING TODAY.

YOU KNOW, THEY DON'T TELL ME ANY MORE THAN THEY TELL YOU.

NOW, I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT THE DAY DAWNS A GOOD DEAL BRIGHTER WHEN YOU'VE ACTUALLY HAD A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP IN A ROOM THAT'S CONSIDERABLY NICER THAN OUR PUBLIC TV BUDGET TENDS TO ALLOW.

IN FACT, THIS PLACE EVEN HAS A TROPHY IN THE LOBBY.

WE ARE SMACK-DAB ON O STREET, WHICH IS IN ITSELF A RECORD HOLDER.

AT LEAST, THAT'S WHAT THEY CLAIM.

THOUGH IT'S NOT MUCH TO LOOK AT, THESE TWO PRODUCERS CAN'T SEEM TO GET ENOUGH.

I BET THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW THEY'RE ON THE LONGEST, STRAIGHTEST MAIN STREET.

PROBABLY TAKE IT FOR GRANTED AFTER A WHILE.

YEAH.

(Don) NOW, I LIKE A LEISURELY PACE AS MUCH AS THE NEXT CAMERAGUY BUT NOT WHEN THE NET GAIN IS REALLY ZERO.

NEXT THING YOU KNOW, WE'RE RUNNING LATE AGAIN.

THAT MEANS NO WYUKA CEMETERY, NO ROLLER SKATING HALL OF FAME.

BUT I WAS PROMISED THE CHANCE TO PLAY A LITTLE CATCH, AND I WILL NOT BE DENIED.

IN FACT, I SEE THE PERFECT PLACE JUST OFF I-80, OUTSIDE MILFORD-- GOING DEEP.

THE WORLD'S LARGEST COVERED WAGON AND... BACKSTOP.

(Randy) DEEP, DEEP, DEEP.

(Mike) IT HIT THE POWER LINE.

(Randy) SEE, THE PIONEERS, FOR ALL THE HARDSHIPS THEY FACED, THINK ABOUT IT.

THEY NEVER HAD TO WORRY ABOUT THE POWER LINES WHILE THEY WERE PLAYING CATCH.

NOW, COME ON, YOU CAN DO THIS.

AHH.

IT'S NOT THAT HARD, REALLY.

AHH.

IT'S TIMING; IT'S EVERYTHING.

UH.

(Don) NOW, WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT WE'D FIND THE BIGGEST AND THE LONGEST IN SUCH CLOSE PROXIMITY?

AND APPARENTLY, THERE'S ANOTHER JUST DOWN THE ROAD IN SEWARD, THOUGH I HADN'T EXPECTED TO FIND IT AT A FURNITURE STORE.

HERE, HOLD THIS.

THANK YOU.

THIS IS THE LID THAT WENT OVER TOP OF THE CAPSULE SO THAT FOR THE FIRST YEAR, YOU COULD CLIMB DOWN IN THAT LID TO GET DOWN INTO THE CAPSULE.

(Don) THAT WOULD BE THE WORLD'S LARGEST TIME CAPSULE, BUILT HERE AT THE HOUSE OF DAVISSON BY HAROLD DAVISSON BECAUSE, WELL, HE COULD.

AMONG THE CONTENTS ARE A BRAND-NEW CHEVY VEGA-- SOME WOULD SAY THE BEST USE EVER FOUND FOR THAT PARTICULAR CAR-- A KAWASAKI MOTORCYCLE, AND THOUSANDS OF HOUSEHOLD ITEMS PLACED THERE BY THE GOOD FOLKS OF SEWARD.

(Trish) THERE'S A POLYESTER LEISURE SUIT FROM ONE MERCHANT.

I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY BOTTLES OF JIM BEAM ARE DOWN THERE.

I'M NOT SURE I WANT TO KNOW.

BUT EVERYONE COULD COME IN AND HAVE A PACKAGE THAT THEY PLACED IN THE TIME CAPSULE.

THE ORIGINAL TIME CAPSULE WAS TOTALLY BELOW GROUND.

I BELIEVE IT'S TEN FOOT BELOW GROUND.

HIS FEAR WAS THAT AS I AM HIS ONLY CHILD LIVING IN NEBRASKA, I WOULD NOT TAKE PROPER CARE OF THE TIME CAPSULE, AND HE WASN'T GOING TO RISK IT.

SO HE SAYS, "OKAY, WE'RE GOING TO BUILD A PYRAMID ON TOP OF IT.

IN THE TOP, YOU FIND A 1975 DATSUN THAT HAS BEEN BEAT TO A PULP, SHOWING WHAT OUR SOCIETY DOES TO A VEHICLE IN TEN YEARS' TIME, THAT IT'S NO LONGER BRAND-NEW IN TEN YEARS' TIME.

(Randy) WE 'VE GOT ONE OF TH OSE VEHICLES OVER THERE.

(Mike) TH AT CHRYSLER MI NIVAN, THERE.

(Trish) MA YBE IF WE GO UP ANOTHER LAYER, WE COULD DO THAT.

(Don) WOULD YOU TRADE SOMETHING FOR THE BIGGEST BALL OF VIDEOTAPE?

[laughs] SURE.

(Mike) WE DO HAVE THE BIGGEST BA LL OF VIDEOTAPE IN THE VAN.

(Randy) UNLESS YOU GOT ONE IN THIS TIME CAPSULE; THAT'S GOING TO REALLY DEFLATE US, JUST, IN A SECOND.

(Trish) NO , NO, NOPE, NOPE-- NO , I DON'T THINK SO.

I THINK, FROM ONE RECORD HOLDER TO ANOTHER, THIS IS IT.

AND IF THEY DON'T WANT YOU, WE'LL JUST START OUR OWN BOOK.

(Don) IS THAT OFF THE RECORD?

OFF THE RECORD, YES.

(Don) BY THE WAY, THAT SQUIGGLY THING OUT FRONT IS ALSO ONE OF HAROLD'S CREATIONS, BUILT AS HIS RESPONSE TO ALL THE MONEY THAT THE STATE WAS SPENDING TO BEAUTIFY ITS HIGHWAY RESTSTOPS, LIKE THIS ONE WE PASSED ON OUR WAY TO GRAND ISLAND, WHICH LOOKS PRETTY LANDLOCKED TO ME.

IF YOU'RE A FAN OF THE FONDAS, YOU'RE WELL AWARE THAT THIS IS HENRY'S HOMETOWN, BUT IN THE WORDS OF ANOTHER FAMOUS NEBRASKAN, "I DID NOT KNOW THAT.

THAT IS WEIRD; THAT IS WILD."

I--I'M--I'M SORRY.

WHAT I REALLY MEANT IS THAT, GEOGRAPHICALLY SPEAKING, WE'VE HIT THE EDGE OF THE SAND HILLS WHERE IT SEEMS THAT PEOPLE START GETTING PRETTY SCARCE.

THE PERSON WE'RE LOOKING FOR LIVES IN MASON CITY AND MAKES PIECES LIKE THESE, USING IRON FROM OLD FARM IMPLEMENTS.

WE SPIED SEVERAL ON THE ROADS LEADING INTO TOWN, AND ONCE YOU GET TO MASON CITY, IT'S NOT HARD TO FIGURE OUT WHICH HOUSE BELONGS TO DICK.

(Dick) I STARTED FARMING IN 1934.

I'M 87 YEARS OLD, AND I WAS 24 THEN.

SO I JUST PLAY WITH THIS OLD IRON, AND THERE'S ABOUT ANY FORM OF OLD IRON YOU CAN THINK OF ON SOME OF THESE OLD-TIME FARMS.

LIKE THAT PENGUIN OUT THERE.

WHEN I FIRST SEEN THAT GAS TANK, I THOUGHT, "BOY, THAT'S SHAPED JUST LIKE A BODY OF A PENGUIN."

SO I LOOKED AROUND AND FOUND SOME ONE ROW CORN CULTIVATOR GAURDS.

THAT'S WHAT THE WINGS ARE MADE OUT OF.

(Randy) GUESS YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHERE TO LOOK FOR CORN CULTIVATOR GUARDS.

YEAH.

(Mike) YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHAT THEY ARE, FIRST.

(Richard) YOU TAKE MY DEVIL OUT THERE, DO YOU KNOW WHERE ALL THOSE RINGS COME FROM?

THAT WHOLE THING IS MADE OUT OFF OF WOOD AND WAGON WHEEL, HUB RINGS.

THERE'S ONLY ONE PIECE OF IRON CUT, AND THAT'S THE END OF HIS TAIL.

(Mike) SO YOU DON'T LIKE TO-- YOU DON'T LIKE TO CUT THEM IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO, HUH?

(Richard) I WON'T DO IT UNLESS I HAVE TO.

HERE'S A CAT.

THE DEVIL OUGHT TO HAVE A BLACK CAT.

THIS IS A HAY KNIFE OUT HERE.

NOW, THEY'RE COMING BACK.

FARMERS USE THEM TO CUT THE BALES.

I MADE THEM, ALWAYS, ON THE FARM, AND I DIDN'T EXACTLY WANT TO COME TO TOWN.

MY WIFE DID.

SO SHE'S THE HAPPY ONE, AND I'M THE SAD ONE.

I CALL THAT WAGES OF WAR-- WHICH IT IS--A SKELETON.

THE BUZZARDS UP AT THERE REPRESENTS THE BUZZARDS THAT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE GUYS THAT DO OUR FIGHTING.

I TOOK IT DOWN AND SHOWED IT AT NEBRASKA STATE FAIR.

THEY LOOKED AT ME; THEY THOUGHT I WAS CRAZY.

WELL, YOU KNOW, THEY'RE NOT TOO FAR OFF AT THAT.

[chuckles] (Mike) HOW HAVE YOU LIVED WITH HIM FOR 60 YEARS?

[Richard chuckles] DIDN'T BELIEVE IN DIVORCE, SEE?

(Richard) THE LAST TIME I WAS AT CHURCH THE OTHER DAY, THE PREACHER PREACHED ABOUT IDLE HANDS, AND HE DIDN'T LOOK RIGHT AT ME WHEN HE WAS PREACHING.

I THINK HE HAD SOMEBODY ELSE PICKED OUT.

(Mike) LOOK AT THAT.

NEBRASKA THUNDERBIRD.

(Don) IT'S NOT GOING TO FIT.

WELL, I SUPPOSE I SHOULD BE HAPPY THAT MIKE HAS ACQUIRED A NICE, NEW PIECE OF ART COURTESY OF THE MARTINS.

HOWEVER, SINCE I SUSPECT IT WILL BE MY SPACE BACK HERE THAT GETS INTRUDED UPON, PERHAPS IT MIGHT BE MORE FITTING IF I GAVE HIM THE BIRD.

crunch DID YOU SAY, "WEASEL"?

(Mike) I CAN SAY IT.

(Randy) BY E, NOW.

THANKS SO MUCH.

IT WAS GREAT.

BYE.

THERE HE GOES.

WE GOTCHA.

[Don laughs] I'M REALLY STILL HERE.

[tires squealing] (Mike) IT'S HARD TO PASS UP-- (Randy) YEAH.

(Mike) A PLACE WITH PELTS ALL OVER THE OUTSIDE.

(Randy) BUFFALO BILL RULES.

(Don) THIS IS THE TOWN THAT BUFFALO BUILT.

PEOPLE FLOCK TO THE CODY RANCH JUST OUTSIDE TOWN, AND HERE IN NORTH PLATTE, THERE ARE ALL SORTS OF WAYS TO TAKE HOME A LITTLE PIECE OF THE FRONTIER.

PLEASE, STEP FORWARD.

PLEASE, STEP FORWARD.

IN HONOR OF YOUR FINE DRIVING ACROSS THE STATE OF NEBRASKA-- UH-OH.

WE MAKE YOU AN HONORARY-- WHOA.

YOUR DRIVING'S BEEN SO GOOD.

IS THAT WHERE THEY PUT THIS?

I THOUGHT THEY USUALLY WORE THEM OVER THE POCKET.

(Don) NO, I DON'T SEE LAW ENFORCEMENT AS A GOOD CAREER PATH FOR EITHER OF THESE GUYS, BUT WHEN IT COMES TO SPOTTING LADY LIBERTY IN ALL HER VARIOUS FORMS, MIKE HAS NO PEER.

BOY SCOUTS OF AMERICA, 1951.

PART OF THE CRUSADE TO STRENGTHEN LIBERTY.

THIS VERSION: OU R LADY OF THE SOFT SERVE.

(Don) THIS ONE DOES MARCH TO A DIFFERENT DRUMMER, AND I WONDER WHAT SHE'D MAKE OF THIS, BUT WE REALLY CAN'T STICK AROUND TO FIND OUT.

WE HAVE CARHENGE ON OUR AGENDA, AND THAT'S WAY UP NORTH.

BUT NOW THE BOYS ARE CLAMORING TO MAKE A STOP IN PAXTON TO SEE OLE'S.

THEY MUST REALLY WANT TO BEAT THE LUNCH RUSH THERE, BECAUSE WE RIPPED RIGHT BY THE KIND OF YARD THAT WOULD USUALLY REQUIRE AT LEAST A SECOND LOOK.

HOWEVER, THOSE KEEN TV MINDS FORGOT TO TAKE INTO ACCOUNT THAT THE TIME ZONES CHANGE BETWEEN HERE AND THERE, WHICH EXPLAINS WHY EVERYONE HERE WAS JUST FINISHING UP WITH BREAKFAST.

NOW, I HAD FIGURED THAT BIG GAME MUST HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT CORNHUSKER FOOTBALL TEAM, BUT ON FURTHER INSPECTION, I SEE THAT OLE WAS THE KIND OF BAR OWNER WHO WAS IN BUSINESS TO MAKE A KILLING--LITERALLY.

(Randy) OL E HIMSELF BAGGED ALL THESE...

IN NEBRASKA.

(Mike) WHERE DO YOU SUPPOSE HE BAGGED THE POLAR BEAR?

(Randy) PROBABLY IN THE NORTH PART OF THE STATE.

HOWDY.

THE WESTERN NEBRASKA CHAMPS.

NOW, IF THEY'D BEEN MOUNTED-- (Mike) THOSE ARE SOME BIG TOOTHPICKS.

(Don) I THINK YOU BOYS ARE STICKING YOUR NECK OUT.

(Roxie) OLE OPENED THE BAR UP IN 1933.

HE BROUGHT HIS FIRST MOUNT IN.

HE OPENED IT ONE MINUTE AFTER PROHIBITION ENDED.

YOU KNOW, BACK THEN, THIS WAS THE ONLY BAR WITHIN A 100-MILE RADIUS, AND WHAT DID A MAN LIKE TO DO WITH HIS PAYCHECK?

(Randy) DOES HAVING ALL THIS AROUND MAKE PEOPLE HUNGRIER?

(Roxie) OF COURSE.

100% NEBRASKA BUFFALO.

(Don) TH EY SAID THEY DIDN'T WANT TO LE AVE TILL THEY WERE STUFFED.

WELL, WE CAN HANDLE THAT.

AS LONG AS WE DON'T HAVE TO HANG THEM ON THE WALL.

(Don) LOOKS LIKE A BUFFALO BURGER THIS EARLY IN THE DAY IS WORKING ON MIKE IN STRANGE AND WONDROUS WAYS, WHICH MAY BE OF CONCERN TO THOSE OF US WHO'LL BE SHARING THE VAN WITH HIM THROUGH MANY MORE MILES OF THESE SAND HILLS.

(Randy) SO HOW'S MY DRIVIN'?

(Don) IT IS A REGION LARGELY DEVOID OF ROCKS AND TREES, AND DESPITE INDICATIONS TO THE CONTRARY, HERE IN ARTHUR, ANY ACTUAL ARHURITES.

WHERE IS EVERYBODY?

(Randy) MAYBE THEY'RE HERE.

[echoing] YOO-HOO.

YOO-HOO.

[echo stops] YOO-HOO.

[knocks] DOES IT SAY OPEN?

YEAH.

OPEN, BUT-- CLOSED OVER TH E NOON HOUR.

(Don) OUR REASONS FOR COMING HERE WERE REALLY QUITE SIMPLE.

WELL, BESIDES THAT, WE WANTED TO SEE THE WORLD'S ONLY HAY-BALE CHURCH.

(Mike) OH, THIS IS LIKE A CUTAWAY SECTION.

WELL, YEAH.

(Randy) YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS A PAINTING?

(Mike) I THOUGHT THAT WAS A PAINTING.

(Don) SO I GUESS THAT MAKES THE WORLD'S SMALLEST COURTHOUSE, WHICH THEY'RE ALSO LAYING CLAIM TO, MORE OR LESS A BONUS.

(John) WELL, THEY USED TO SAY THAT WE HAD THE SMALLEST COURTHOUSE, OKAY?

WE'VE BUILT A SECOND ONE.

NOW WE HAVE THE TWO SMALLEST.

(Randy) WE JUST SAY IT, AND UNTIL SOMEONE PROVES IT DIFFERENT-- (John) UNTIL SOMEBODY ELSE COMES IN AND SAYS, "OURS IS SMALLER THAN THAT," WELL, I GUESS WE GOT IT, RIGHT?

THAT'S EXACTLY HOW WE DO IT.

WE'VE GOT THE WORLD'S LARGEST BALL OF VIDEOTAPE.

OH, IS THAT RIGHT?

NOBODY CARES.

EXCUSE ME?

(Don) NOW, THOSE ARE ALMOST FIGHTING WORDS, BUT COOLER HEADS DID PREVAIL.

MAYBE SOMEONE REMEMBERED HOW THE JAIL IN THE WORLD'S SMALLEST COURTHOUSE SMELLED, AND PRETTY SOON, WE WERE BACK ON THE ROAD.

AFTER COMING SO FAR AND PUTTING UP WITH SO MUCH, THERE'S NO WAY I'M GOING TO MISS THE JAW-DROPPING STOP THAT I KNOW AWAITS US IN ALLIANCE.

EVERYBODY SEE IT?

THEY GO, "BOO."

AND THEY SHOULD.

BECAUSE IT'S NOT OFTEN YOU SEE ANYTHING QUITE LIKE CARHENGE.

LAID OUT IN A FIELD JUST OFF HIGHWAY 385, JUST LIKE THAT FAMOUS ONE IN ENGLAND.

(Paul) WELL, THERE'S NO STONE HERE.

SO JIM REINDERS CAME TO THE NEXT BEST THING: THESE BIG OLD CARS OF THE '50s AND '60s.

WHEN YOU PLANT THEM IN THE GROUND, THEY STICK UP ABOVE THE GROUND 15 TO 18 FEET, THE SAME AS AT STONEHENGE, AND THEY'RE ALSO SEVEN FEET WIDE, LIKE STONEHENGE.

HE INSTALLED THIS IN JUNE OF 1987.

HE PUT UP THE FIRST 28 CARS, AND WHEN HE PUT UP THE FIRST 28 CARS, PEOPLE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THIS GUY WAS DOING.

THEY KNEW HE OWNED THIS LAND OUT HERE.

THEN THE NEBRASKA DEPARTMENT OF ROADS BECAME CONCERNED ABOUT THIS.

THEY SAID, "THIS IS A JUNKYARD."

AND THE REGULATIONS DO NOT PERMIT JUNKYARDS OUT HERE.

BUT THANK GOODNESS FOR THE ART COMMUNITY.

THE ART COMMUNITY SAID, "THIS MAN IS A GENIUS TO HAVE DONE THIS."

[laughs] (Randy) NOW, THEY WEREN'T ALWAYS ALL MONOCHROMATIC, WERE THEY?

NO, NO, WE PAINTED THEM.

MONOCHROMATIC: ART TERM.

JUST WANTED TO THROW THAT IN.

OH, YEAH.

THEY PAY EXTRA FOR THAT.

RANDY, WE ESCHEW DRUIDS.

CONTRARY TO PUBLIC OPINION, THE DRUIDS DID NOT BUILD STONEHENGE.

THERE'S SOME FORDS OVER THERE, AND SOME PERSON SAID, "YOU KNOW, I REALLY HAD A GREAT TIME IN ONE OF THOSE CARS ONE TIME."

[laughs] THIS IS A CIRCULAR AREA, AND AT STONEHENGE, THERE IS WHAT IS CALLED THE AUBREY CIRCLE.

THAT IS ONE OF THE STATION STONES.

WELL, THIS, AH, IS THE HEEL STONE.

ON THE MORNING OF THE SUMMER SOLSTICE, THE SUN WOULD COME OVER THE TOP OF THIS THING.

IT WOULD CAST ITS LIGHT INTO THE CENTER OF STONEHENGE, RIGHT UNDERNEATH THAT WILLYS JEEP.

I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT JIM REINDERS, WHEN HE BUILT THIS THING, HE HAD FOUR IMPORTED CARS, BUT IN 1992-- OR WAS IT '93-- HE DECIDED THAT THIS WAS NOT A GOOD THING.

AND HE BURIED THEM HERE.

AND WE HAVE A BURIAL MOUND, SAME AS AT STONEHENGE.

(Don) JIM REINDERS, WHO, BY THE WAY, WAS NOT TRAINED IN ART, LIVES IN ALBUQUERQUE THESE DAYS AND COMES BACK EVERY NOW AND THEN TO INSPECT HIS CAR-ART RESERVE, COMPLETE WITH OTHER PEOPLE'S PIECES THAT ADDRESS THE SAME THEMES.

(Mike) TH E BACK HOOD OF A VOLKSWAGEN.

(Paul) YOU GOT IT, MAN!

YAY!

(Don) AND SOMEDAY, IT SOUNDS LIKE HE MIGHT COME BACK FOR GOOD.

(Paul) THE WAY THAT HIS WIFE PUTS IT, "WELL, IF JIM REINDERS, MY HUSBAND, DIES BEFORE I DO, "HE'LL BE CREMATED, AND I'LL PUT HIS ASHES IN THE ASHTRAYS OF THESE CARS."

(Mike) THAT'S A NICE TOUCH.

[Paul laughs] (Don) THAT SOUNDS GOOD, AND I KNOW ONE VEHICLE I WOULDN'T MIND LEAVING TO THE CAUSE.

BUT MAYBE THAT'S NOT MY CALL.

vroom I'M JUST DON THE CAMERAGUY, SIGNING OFF.

ON JUNE 21st OF THIS YEAR, WE ARE GOING TO HAVE A POETRY READING HERE.

WE HAVE THREE AWARDS.

FIRST AWARD IS FOR $100.

NEXT AWARD IS $50.

THIRD AWARD IS $25.

(Mike) I'VE GOT ONE IN MY HEAD ALREADY.

(Paul) ALL RIGHT.

(Mike) WHEN I HAVE TIME, I DRIVE A CAR, WAY OUT WEST, OH, SO FAR.

(Paul) OH, SAY.

HALLELUJAH.

(Mike) WHAT DO YOU THINK?

(Randy) $25?

(Mike) $45?

(Randy) $2.50?

(Mike) $.25?

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