>> Hi, I'm Lewis Howes, New York Times best-selling author and entrepreneur, and welcome to "The School of Greatness," where we interview the most influential minds and leaders in the world to inspire you to live your best life today.

And in this episode, we sit down with Kevin Hart, extremely successful comedian, actor, and entrepreneur, and today, he shares how to learn from your mistakes, overcome self-doubt, and become massively successful.

I'm so glad you're here today, so let's dive in and let the class begin.

♪ ♪ >> You know, I think we've lost a level of normalcy.

We've lost a level of normalcy to the point where everybody's held to these standards that aren't realistic.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> You're held to the highest of the high without ever asking to be or without ever saying that you should be, you know?

Like, it's kind of crazy, and I think, because of that, so many people are now getting in their way.

So many people are getting in their own way, you know?

And it's because of the judgment.

It's because of the fear of what you think people think.

>> Yeah.

>> The fear of the conversation that you have no idea about or, you know, control over.

It's a fear, but it's you in your own head.

And what I found with me through all the ups and downs -- and there's definitely a lot of ups and there's a lot of downs -- you know, I've been able to realize that some things you just can't change, and the things that you can't change, you can't control.

You can only get past and attempt to do better moving forward.

And that's kind of what I've held on to in life, and that's what's helped me get to where I am today.

And this doesn't mean that I'm at some amazing place and standing on some amazing mountain and screaming down below.

It just means that I have information that I think is valuable and that I think some people may want to hear, and, you know, if that's the case, then it's just a way to develop some mental fitness that you may not have known that you have the ability to do.

>> I think this is huge for people to understand.

You seem like a guy who has zero self-doubt.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> And at the same point, you talk about the -- being liked and likable, the difference between being liked and likable.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> As a comedian growing up, you had to do so many horrible shows where three people were in attendance, one person -- whatever -- 10 people.

And it didn't go well.

People aren't standing up laughing, they're not giving you standing ovations, they're booing, whatever it is.

How do you get to the point where you show up day in, day out, every night to these places if you're not being liked or likable and no one's giving you reassurance that you're actually any good in the beginning?

>> What I found -- I was like, "Look, everybody's not gonna like you.

And you can't change that.

You can't control that."

So it's my job to be happy with my attempt... >> Mm.

>> ...and what it is that I'm trying to do.

That's my job.

Each one of those opportunities was a way for me to work on me, my craft, and I'm supposed to take something out of that moment that's good.

Whether it's 2 laughs, whether it's 20, whether it's 100, I have to take something away from this experience and basically hold on to it and improve off of that.

>> Yeah.

>> If I go do these things and everything about these things are always bad, well, that means that I'm doing something wrong.

>> Right.

>> They can't always be bad.

There has to be something good that's coming out of it.

I'm just not searching for it.

So I found a way to search for the good.

I found a way to search for, you know, the positive side of my experiences.

And as I continued to do that, I developed a high level of shoulder-shrug.

Even the easiest road is still met with some degrees of difficulty.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> At somewhere, some point, there are no easy roads.

>> Yeah.

>> So when I was coming up and I'm not getting any auditions or I'm not getting any opportunities, I had to say to myself, "It's going to come."

>> Mm.

>> "If I put the work in, it has no choice but to come."

Now, as I'm saying that and doing that, I'm looking around.

There are certain comedians that were doing the same stuff over and over again, for years on years on years, certain comedians that felt comfortable with just making whatever the money was.

It wasn't about the money.

It was about the craft.

So I knew that if I got better at the craft that I would eventually get to the money, and that's what my focus was.

Granted, I'm a part of a very small percentage, and, you know, you have to attach some luck to it, and the hard work with the luck is an amazing collaboration.

So it ended up paying off, but I knew what I had to do.

So there were no other options.

I didn't have other baskets with eggs in it.

This was it.

>> There's no backup plan.

So you weren't thinking of like, "I'm gonna get a job here.

This is the only thing I've got"?

>> No, no.

>> Now, when you were getting, you know, booed at and it wasn't going your way for years, was it your mom that you come back to and say, "Well, I still believe in you.

You're funny.

You've got this"?

Did you have a group of friends that would actually encourage you, or were they kind of saying, "What are you doing this for?

Go get a real job."

>> There were no other options, right?

And there was nobody to really lean on because nobody saw the gold in comedy.

>> Mm.

>> You know?

When you're trying to -- you tell your friends or your family members that you're doing stand-up comedy, it's not... >> There's no money.

[ Laughs ] >> ...like you're about to be a millionaire.

You're gonna make it all.

Nobody says that.

They're like, "What?"

That's a vision that you have... >> Wow.

>> ...and that you have to hone in on 'cause nobody else has that.

>> How did you see that, that this is something you can make potentially a lot of money with or enough to live?

>> I loved it.

>> Mm.

>> I loved it, and there were people who did, so they obviously -- there's obviously a world of revenue that funnels through comedy.

Why do all these comedy clubs all over exist?

>> Mm-hmm.

>> Why do these colleges book comedians every year and the colleges have to spend a certain amount of money on entertainment?

Why are comedians the ones that are best suitable for hosting jobs, personality-driven jobs, et cetera?

Radio personalities.

There's so many doors that get open.

>> Talk shows, yeah.

>> Yeah, in the world of comedy.

So when you look at that and you realize that, it's just about figuring out how to get there.

>> Yeah.

>> That's the hardest part -- how do you get there?

How do you go down that road?

What are the goals?

What are the accomplishments that are baby accomplishments but that become bigger?

>> Do you think that you'd be able to build the empire you have as a single man with essentially "more time" to go out and do the things you want to do, master your craft, build your business, or do you believe that having a great family, a great wife is the key to part of your success and growth as well?

>> You definitely need that.

Can you be single and have success?

Of course.

There's several people out there that do.

Can you also not be focused?

Absolutely.

You know, the world of fun is never-ending if you want it to be.

Every night can be a fantastic night.

But every morning can be a rough, groggy one.

There's an amazing reward that comes within that.

But for me, I don't want that.

I wouldn't be good with that, and I don't think that the level of success that I have reached I would've been able to reach with a crazy amount of freedom.

I needed the "got to get home, got to be home, can't do."

Did that stop me from being...a couple places?

No.

You know, did I learn from my mistakes?

Of course.

Are they mistakes that I would take back if I could?

No, I wouldn't because I wouldn't be able to understand at the level that I do now, you know what I mean?

>> Yeah.

>> So without those mistakes and hard punches in the stomach of reality of life, then you don't have any space to grow.

You need the security of an environment that's a good environment and not an environment created off of what you have... >> Mm-hmm.

>> ...and who you are.

>> Right.

>> And if you're engulfed in that world... >> Temptation left and right.

>> And how much of it is for you as an individual and as a good person?

>> Mm-hmm.

>> And how much of it is influenced by the world that you're in and what you have?

>> Yeah.

I love what you said here.

The world is judging everyone who has any influence to be perfect on every level of every word they say, action they take.

And yet what I'm hearing you say is you need to fail, you need to make mistakes, you need to be an idiot sometimes so you have perspective, and it sounds like, for the next decade, two, maybe more, you're gonna make a lot more mistakes.

>> You don't know what you're gonna do.

Like, that's the amazing thing about life.

It's your job to try to do your best to grow and to set up whatever you can for those around you.

>> Mm.

>> And if you don't have people around you, then you're living for yourself.

But it's your job to do the best that you can in doing that.

>> Yeah.

>> Along the way, you're gonna make mistakes.

You have to experience some down to know why you're getting up.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> You know?

Like, this whole -- the whole thing of a cancel culture and the consequences being so severe for so many... Do I think that there should be consequences for people's actions?

Absolutely, absolutely.

But are you telling me that you should never be able to recover from a mistake?

Then why the...do people go to jail?

>> Right.

>> Aren't you supposed to go to jail... >> To learn.

>> ...to learn from the...mistakes so you can get out and then do better?

>> Mm-hmm.

>> That's what this whole reform thing is, is like you send me to jail to go do better and get better, and then I come out, and because I was in jail, nobody wants to allow me to get better.

It's a backwards thing.

>> Yeah.

>> So are we teaching lessons or not?

Are we -- Do we want people to improve or do we not?

>> Right.

>> What are we saying?

>> Yeah.

>> So you really get to see who people are when adversity...puts itself on display.

>> Yeah.

>> Who are you and who are we?

And, you know, I've had to do the same where I've had to really ask myself who am I when...really hit the fan.

You know, when these moments hit, there's a reason why not many people get up after.

>> Mm.

A lot of people don't get up.

>> The reason why a lot of people don't get up, these things are hard things to overcome and deal with.

They're very hard.

>> Yeah.

>> So when you do make it out of those storms and when you are an individual that can go, "Wow, I can't believe we experienced that" and you look back and you go, "Oh, my God, that was how many years ago?

But look at us now."

>> Mm.

>> "Look at where we are now."

That's a thing.

That's something to hold on to.

>> Yeah, and what I've noticed is you almost want to have friends who have gone through adversity 'cause you start to learn about who your friends truly are at your lowest times, right?

>> Some character.

I mean, my kids -- me and my kids had a talk the other day.

You know, they had an attitude they're going through some stuff.

I think the craziest thing is, you know, they were going through something, and they were, like, really down about it.

They were just pissed.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> Didn't want to do something.

And I'm like -- I said, "The thing that's crazy that you guys don't understand," I was like, "life is so not perfect.

Life is so not perfect."

I said, "And you guys don't understand that you've yet to be hit in the face with life."

>> Yeah, with challenges, real challenges.

>> Yeah.

"You've only seen perfect."

>> Mm.

Success, yeah.

>> "You haven't seen challenges."

And I said, "This is an example of a challenge."

I said, "And now, in dealing with this, I'm going to use a phrase, and that phrase is 'cowboy up.'"

>> Mm-hmm.

>> And right now, you're living in a time where if you say that, you have some people that challenge, "Don't talk to kids.

What does that mean?"

Hey, I'm gonna tell you what it means.

Cowboying up means strap up your boots and get to work.

Whether you like it or not, you got to get it done.

In this case, go through your turmoil, but unfortunately, Dad can't be here to pick up the pieces.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> Go through it.

You'll learn from it later.

And I really embraced that moment because I'm like this is a lesson.

They'll get to walk out of this.

And I said it may not hit today.

It may not hit next week, but eventually it's going to hit.

But if you don't embrace those moments, then you're missing out on the beauty of life.

>> Yeah.

>> You're missing out on the lessons that come with it.

And I just think it's a great opportunity for me to highlight a lot of moments and give people a understanding and visual as to how I dealt with where I got to the strength to move on and how, why understanding me and myself is the most beneficial thing I've ever done in my life.

>> Mm.

>> You know, and this is just information.

This isn't a way that you have to live.

>> Yeah.

>> This isn't a book that you got to follow or else you're gonna lose.

No, it's just information.

So many people are afraid to give and share information.

I'm not.

I'm just sharing information.

>> I'm curious if you can share the nonnegotiables for you on a daily basis internally, on the inside of your mind, of your heart, of your soul.

What are the things that you need to do -- I know externally you're working out consistently, you're doing certain things, you're doing the hard work physically.

But internally, do you say something to yourself?

Do you mentally take notes about "I'm gonna hug and kiss my wife and kids every morning"?

What are the nonnegotiables on a day-to-day basis for you that make you better?

>> No day starts without me working on myself, which is a workout, you know.

My workouts just have a meaning, and that meaning is self-improvement.

>> Mm.

>> It's not necessarily just about the look.

It's about my mind.

It's about knowing that I'm getting up and I am putting some effort and energy into me at the top of my day.

You know, making sure that my wife and my kids know that I love them on a day-to-day basis.

You don't know what life has planned, so there is no day that should go by without that communication.

And I'll say, now, really focusing on and thinking on the future but also processing the now.

>> How does that look?

>> Yeah, it's like, well, the future looks bright because I want it to be bright.

And that's the thing -- like, those dreams become reality if you really do believe them and if you put the work into them.

You can't just dream just to dream.

You can't just dream and expect it to show up.

That's not -- That's two different -- You can't do that.

"Oh, my God, I dreamed of one day having..." Well, what are you doing to make that dream come true?

It doesn't just -- That's not how it works.

Something has to be put into execution to make a dream happen.

So, in understanding that, what are my affirmations?

What are the things that I'm speaking on?

What are the things that I want?

What's the energy that I'm putting out there to myself, to my team, to my family.

Like, what am I working on?

40 years old.

What does it look like at 50?

>> Mm.

>> You know?

Am I done at 50?

Am I working to be done at 50?

If so, what should I have by that time?

Where should I be at at 45?

Like, these are the things that I just -- I take a lot of pride and energy and effort into vetting out and into thinking.

So a lot of the things that you see me do, these aren't impromptu moments.

This stuff is well thought out, calculated.

It's -- It's been on purpose for quite some time.

>> Yeah.

What do you dream about for the next 10 years for your future?

>> I think the biggest one is just my business surpassing my celebrity.

>> Mm.

>> You know?

>> What does that mean?

In terms of revenue, in terms of...?

>> Well, a lot of people think it's just the money.

Like I was saying, you know, "I want to be a billionaire."

And it's not just about the money that comes with being a billionaire.

It's about the story attached to my name.

You know, it's about where I come from, what I did, and about the younger kids that can go, "Wow, it's possible," right?

It's achievable.

It's possible.

And it's something that not many of my particular people get the opportunity to do or be a part of.

It's a world that is very far, few, and in between.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> So if I can get in that world and show the blueprint as to how along the way create jobs and change lives, then that's an amazing moment.

That's an amazing thing.

I mean, look, in 10 years, in a perfect world, when I'm 50, I would like to battle with the decision of possibly retiring.

>> Mm.

>> At 50, you know.

>> Wow.

What does that mean?

Retiring your business, retiring comedy, retiring movies?

>> I think it means just sitting down.

>> Mm.

>> I think it means sitting down and being with my family on the day-to-day, being with the wife, the kids, and the dogs and just just being here, you know?

That's a nice feeling, and at some point, when you get on the other side of life, for me, I want to slow down to enjoy that other side, you know?

Come out the gates.

Come out the gates and we're running.

>> Yeah.

>> And at 50, if we are blessed enough to get there.

That's the start of the other side.

>> Mm-hmm.

>> So what does that other side look like?

What do you want it to look like?

What do you want to do?

I think for me, I just want it to be a little slower.

>> Did you start to have that perspective after the car accident, or is that something you've always had?

Because you're this outgoing, you know, personality, but I know that your alone time is so important to you as well.

>> I think it was definitely enhanced and enhanced after that.

It definitely...

It definitely was much bigger.

It was -- It was...

This just showed you that you're not in control.

>> Mm.

>> You know?

And when you're not in control or when you think you are, it's like, "What was -- I'm tripping."

At any point in time, this can be over.

It all can be over.

So make sure that you just take the time to let those know or those closest to you, around you, know what they mean to you and how much you love them, et cetera.

Like, this is a -- it's something that you should make a priority and that you should just be kind to yourself, and I think there was a period of time where I wasn't, when I lost that.

And for that, I'm glad that, you know, I had a nice little eye-opener.

>> Yeah.

>> You know what I mean?

>> Of course.

>> It came right on time.

>> I know how powerful and important your mom was in your life.

What would you say is the overall greatest lesson she taught you, that you really lean on today even more so than when you were younger?

>> To not do anything halfway.

If you're gonna do something, give it your all.

But don't do anything halfway.

There's no value in it, none.

There's no value in doing something halfway.

Either give it your all or don't do it.

Don't do it.

Plain and simple.

>> This is a question I ask everyone at the end.

It's called the Three Truths.

So I'd like you to imagine that you're as old as you want to be but one day you got to turn the lights off and you got to call it quits.

And you've accomplished every dream you could imagine.

Everything has come true and you've lived as long as you want to live.

But you got to leave behind three things you know to be true about all the lessons you've learned in life to the world, and this is all we would have.

What would you say are your Three Truths that you would share to us?

>> As lessons to live within life, three things -- live, love, and laugh.

>> Mm.

>> I say it all the time.

Hashtag it.

I mean it.

>> Yeah.

>> Live, love, laugh.

Do those things as much as you possibly can, then you're setting yourself up for a nice future in life.

>> Yeah.

My final question is, what's your definition of greatness?

>> Happiness within what you do.

That's a nice definition of greatness.

If there's happiness within what you do, then you have achieved a high level of greatness because that's what -- that's what a lot of people are searching to find, that thing that makes them happy.

So if you found that and you're doing that, take my hat off to you.

>> Mm.

>> I take my hat off to you and I say congrats.

And to those that haven't, just telling you that one day you will and use the thing that you're doing now that you may not be the happiest with to get to the place that you will find that joy.

>> We hope you enjoyed this episode and found it valuable for your life.

Make sure to stay tuned for more from "The School of Greatness" coming soon on public television.

Again, I'm Lewis Howes, and if no one has told you lately, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter.

And now it's time to go out there and do something great.

If you'd like to continue on the journey of greatness with me, please check out my website, lewishowes.com, where you'll find over 1,000 episodes of "The School of Greatness" show, as well as tools and resources to support you in living your best life.

>> The online course "Find Your Greatness" is available for $19.

Drawn from the lessons Lewis Howes shares in "The School of Greatness," this interactive course will guide you through a step-by-step process to discover your strengths, connect to your passion and purpose, and help create your own blueprint for greatness.

To order, go to lewishowes.com/tv.

♪ ♪ ♪