COMING UP ON "BEHIND THE WOMAN."

>> I'M EXCITED TO INTRODUCE EMILY DARRENBACHER.

>> I'VE COME TO WORK IN MORE MENTAL HEALTH AND SUICIDE PREVENTION AND THAT CAME AFTER I LOST MY BROTHER IN 2014 TO SUICIDE.

TONIGHT WE ARE AT THE HIGH SCHOOL FOR THEIR HOMECOMING GAME AND THEY'RE ACKNOWLEDGING MY BROTHER REED WHO ATTENDED WESTHILL AND PLAYED FOOTBALL HERE.

LITTLE PROBLEMS MIGHT BE LITTLE TO SOME PEOPLE BUT DON'T FEEL LITTLE TO OTHERS.

WE CAN TALK ABOUT WHO HE WAS AND IF WE CAN SPREAD AWARENESS, THAT'S MY BIGGEST MISSION RIGHT NOW.

♪ I GOT A GOOD, GOOD FEELING.

♪ YEAH I'M UP ON A CLOUD, AIN'T COMING BACK DOWN ♪ ♪ I GOT A GOOD, GOOD FEELING.

♪ YEAH I'M UP ON A CLOUD, AIN'T COMING BACK DOWN ♪ GOOD EVENING AND WELCOME TO BEHIND THE WOMAN.

I AM YOUR HOST, Dr. JUHANNA ROGERS.

WE ARE HERE TO RECOGNIZE AND CELEBRATE DIVERSE WOMEN THAT ARE ENHANCING CENTRAL NEW YORK.

THAT INCLUDES THE WOMAN SITTING NEXT TO ME ON THE COUCH THIS EVENING.

I'M EXCITED TO INTRODUCE EMILY DARRENBACHER, A MENTAL HEALTH ADVOCATE WHO HAS DEDICATED HER LIFE TO MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS AND SUICIDE PREVENTION.

I WANT TO YOU GATHER YOUR FAMILY AROUND THE TELEVISION, SEND A TEXT TO YOUR FRIENDS, THEY WILL NOT WANT TO MISS THIS EPISODE OF "BEHIND THE WOMAN."

GOOD EVENING, EMILY.

>> HELLO.

>> HOW ARE YOU?

>> I'M DOING WELL, HOW ARE YOU?

>> I'M SO EXCITED TO HAVE YOU HERE ON THE COUCH OF "BEHIND THE WOMAN."

I'VE HEARD A LOT ABOUT YOU AND THE WORK THAT YOU ARE DOING.

SO THANK YOU FOR THAT.

AND I WANT TO GET INTO GETTING TO KNOW EMILY, RIGHT?

SO WHY DON'T YOU TALK TO US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHO YOU ARE, WHERE DID YOU GROW UP.

AND HOW DID YOU FIND YOURSELF GETTING INTO MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS AND KIND OF ADVOCACY WORK?

>> SURE, SO I GREW UP HERE IN SYRACUSE.

I GRADUATED FROM WESTHILL HIGH SCHOOL AND I WENT TO CITY BROCKPORT AND I STUDIED PSYCHOLOGY.

PROFESSIONALLY I'VE ALWAYS WORKED WITH ADULTS WITH DISABILITIES BUT I'VE COME TO WORK IN MORE MENTAL HEALTH AND SUICIDE PREVENTION AS VOLUNTEERING AND BEING PARTS OF DIFFERENT ORGANIZATIONS AND THAT CAME AFTER I LOST MY BROTHER IN 2014 TO SUICIDE.

AND JUST WANTING TO FIND WAYS TO BE INVOLVED AND TO REALLY EDUCATE MYSELF ON ALL THE THINGS THAT I DIDN'T KNOW WERE OUT THERE ABOUT SUICIDE AND ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH AND HOW TO MAKE AN IMPACT.

>> GOTCHA, WOW.

I'M GOING TO PICK THAT APART A LITTLE BIT, RIGHT?

BECAUSE I'M LIKE YOU HAVE SAID THAT A UNTIL OF TIMES-- I CAN TELL THE WAY THAT ROLLED OFF YOUR TONGUE, YOU MUST DO THIS FOR A LIVING.

TALK TO ME ABOUT BEFORE 2014, WHEN IT SEEMED LIKE YOUR LIFE PROBABLY CHANGED A LOT.

WERE YOU ALWAYS INTERESTED?

DID YOU GROW UP KIND OF THINKING THAT MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS AND ADVOCACY WORK WAS WHAT YOU WERE PLANNING TO DO?

>> NO.

AND I THINK LIKE SO MANY PEOPLE, MY VIEW OF SUICIDE PRIOR TO LOSING MY BROTHER WAS VERY DIFFERENT.

IT WAS WHAT WE SEE ON TV AND IN MOVIES AND WHAT THE CHARACTERS THAT DIE OF SUICIDE LOOK LIKE.

PRIOR TO LOSING MY BROTHER, THAT WAS REALLY ALL I KNEW OF SUICIDE.

AND I DIDN'T KNOW, YOU KNOW, WARRING SIGNS, WHAT TO LOOK FOR.

I DIDN'T KNOW THE ORGANIZATIONS OUT THERE.

I REALLY DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT SUICIDE OTHER THAN KIND OF WHAT I HEARD.

>> SO WHAT WERE YOU PLANNING, IF YOU CAN REMEMBER BACK TO BEFORE 2014, WHAT WERE YOU PLANNING TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE?

>> I WAS PLANNING TO WORK WITH ADILTS WITH DISABILITIES, TO WORK WITH PEOPLE WITH DIFFERENT ABILITIES IN WHATEVER CAPACITY I COULD.

AT THE TIME, I HAD ONE IDEA OF MY LIFE, BUT AS LIFE WOULD HAPPEN, THINGS CHANGED.

>> TALK TO US A LITTLE BIT IF IT IS COMFORTABLE FOR TO YOU DO SO, ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU WERE IN COLLEGE IN THE MIDST OF YOUR CAREER IN 2014, THAT CHANGED THE COURSE OF YOUR LIFE A LITTLE BIT.

>> YEAH, I WAS HOME ON SPRING BREAK AND I WENT BACK TO COLLEGE AND THE NEXT MORNING I LEARNED THAT MY BROTHER HAD TAKEN HIS LIFE.

I REALLY HAD TO JUMP INTO OKAY, WHAT COMES NEXT.

SO I CAME HOME AND STARTED PROCESSING.

BUT WITH EACH STEP OF GRIEF, YOU KIND OF TAKE IT ONE DAY AT A TIME OR ONE WEEK AT A TIME.

SO WHEN HE PASSED AWAY, IT WAS UNDERSTANDING KIND OF WHAT HE WAS GOING THROUGH AND THE THINGS THAT WERE WEIGHING ON HIM.

>> CAN YOU TALK TO US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHO YOUR BROTHER WAS TO YOU?

>> RIGHT.

WHEN I THINK OF MY BROTHER, THE THING THAT STICKS OUT THE MOST IS JUST THE WAY HE MADE OTHER PEOPLE FEEL.

HE WAS ALWAYS, YOU KNOW, THE BIGGEST VOICE AND THE BIGGEST SMILE IN THE ROOM AND HE ALWAYS KNEW HOW TO CONNECT PEOPLE AND HOW TO MAKE PEOPLE FEEL IMPORTANT.

HE WAS SOMEBODY IN HIS SCHOOL THAT REALLY PLAYED A ROLE IN A LOT OF PEOPLE'S EXPERIENCES.

HE WAS THE QUARTERBACK AND THE CAPTAIN OF THE FOOTBALL TEAM.

SO HE WAS REALLY CONNECTED.

>> WOULD YOU SAY THAT HE WAS THE POPULAR GUY?

>> UH-HUH, ABSOLUTELY.

YEP.

HE WAS THE POPULAR GUY AND HE MADE WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT THE HIGH SCHOOL QUARTERBACK, BLONDE HAIR, BLUE EYES, THAT WAS HIM.

>> AND SO YOUR HOME, YOU ARE HOME SPRING BREAK WITH HIM, OF COURSE HE WAS YOUNGER THAN YOU.

>> YES.

>> AND YOU GO BACK TO COLLEGE AND GET THIS PHONE CALL THAT HE HAS TAKEN HIS LIFE AND, I GUESS MAYBE YOU, I WOULD ASSUME, IN SOME WAYS, BEING A LITTLE BIT OLDER, AWAY FROM HOME, YOU WERE THINKING EVERYTHING WITH HIS LIFE WAS WHAT A HIGH SCHOOL KID DREAMS OF, RIGHT?

>> RIGHT.

>> SO WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED SINCE THEN THAT HAS HELPED YOU KIND OF UNDERSTAND HIS EXPERIENCE FROM A DIFFERENT LENS, I GUESS?

>> I THINK I REALLY PAID MORE ATTENTION TO LITTLE PROBLEMS MIGHT BE LITTLE TO SOME PEOPLE BUT DON'T FEEL LITTLE TO OTHERS THAT ARE GOING THROUGH THINGS.

I'VE ALSO LEARNED THAT WHEN WE THINK OF SUICIDE, IT DOESN'T HAVE A SET FACE, YOU KNOW, IT DOESN'T IMPACT ONE PERSON OR ONE STIEP OF PERSON-- OR ONE TYPE OF PERSON, AND REALLY, TEENAGERS AND KIDS IN HIGH SCHOOL ARE GOING THROUGH A LOT AT THAT TIME AND THEY'RE REALLY THE ONCE THAT ARE TAKING ON A BIG MENTAL HEALTH BURRED THAN IN-- A BIG MENTAL HEALTH BURDEN IN A LOT OF CASES.

>> I'M PROCESSING HOW SOMETHING LIKE THIS CHANGES THE COURSE OF YOUR LIFE.

AND SO YOU GET THE NEWS AFTER RETURNING TO CAMPUS.

AND YOU KNOW, YOU ARE PROCESSING WHAT IS HAPPENING, YOU ARE GOING THROUGH THE STAGES OF GRIEF.

BUT WHAT HAPPENS TO EMILY, I GUESS, IN THIS PROCESS?

>> FOR A VERY LONG TIME, I COULDN'T TALK ABOUT IT.

IT WAS SOMETHING I WANTED TO KEEP AS CLOSE AS I COULD.

I DIDN'T WANT PEOPLE WHO DIDN'T KNOW HIM TO LEARN HOW HE DIED AND HAVE THIS IDEA OF WHO HE WAS WITHOUT KNOWING HIM.

SO I KEPT IT VERY CLOSE THIS TO THE CHEST.

AND THEN I REMEMBER THAT HE WOULD ALWAYS TELL ME THAT I TALKED TOO MUCH SO I DECIDED IF I WAS GOING TO TALK TOO MUCH, I WAS GOING TO MAKE IT COUNT FOR SOMETHING.

SO I'M GOING TO SPEAK UP ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH AND SUICIDE PREVENTION AND MAKE SURE THAT IF I'M TALKING, IT MATTERS AND PEOPLE ARE GETTING TO KNOW WHO HE WAS THROUGH ME.

>> HOW LONG DID IT TAKE YOU IN BETWEEN THAT-- I'M NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT WITH ANYBODY, TO NO, MAYBE IT IS OKAY?

>> I THINK PROBABLY IT TOOK ME TWO OR THREE YEARS.

IT WASN'T THAT I WASN'T IN DENIAL ABOUT IT OR THAT I COULDN'T ACCEPT IT OR SHAME.

BUT AT ONE POINT IT FELT LIKE IT WAS SHAME AND I DIDN'T WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW THAT ABOUT HIM AND I NEVER WANTED TO THINK ABOUT WHAT HE WOULD THINK IF HE THOUGHT I WAS ASHAMED OF HIM OR THE WAY HE DIED.

I ALWAYS WANTED AND I'M SO PROUD TO SAY HE WAS MY BROTHER: SO GOING THROUGH A COUPLE OF YEARS OF REALLY NOT WANTING TO SHARE IT WITH PEOPLE WHO DIDN'T KNOW HIM BECAUSE I WAS WORRIED OF WHAT THOUGHTS THEY HAD OF HIM, AND THEN KIND OF JUST WON DAY REALIZING-- ONE DAY REALIZING THAT I WASN'T DOING ANYONE ANY GOOD BY KEEPING IT IN.

THAT THERE WAS SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT, SO MUCH TO BE PROUD OF, SO THAT'S WHERE IT SHIFTED.

>> GOTCHA.

WERE YOU STILL IN SCHOOL WHEN YOU WERE MAKING THAT SHIFT OR DID THAT HAPPEN FOR YOU AFTERWARDS?

>> AFTER.

>> I'M EVEN LIKE STUNNED AT THE FACT THAT THAT HAPPENED.

THAT YOU STILL WENT BACK AND FINISHED.

>> YEP.

I FINISHED.

THAT WAS MY LAST SEMESTER OF MY JUNIOR YEAR.

SO I FINISHED OUT THAT SEMESTER AND THEN I HAD ONE MORE.

>> GOTCHA.

WHAT GIVES YOU STRENGTH TO KEEP DOING THIS WORK?

>> I THINK IT'S REED, AND IT'S KNOWING THAT... >> IS THAT YOUR BROTHER'S NAME, REED?

>> YES, MY BROTHER.

HE GIVES ME STRENGTH BECAUSE LIKE I SAID, HE WAS ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE THAT DIDN'T REALLY HAVE FEARS.

HE WOULD JUST TALK TO ANYONE AND, YOU KNOW, JUMP FIRST AND THINK ABOUT WHAT WAS GOING TO HOP LATER.

SO HE GIVES ME THE STRENGTH TO DO THAT BUT I ALSO KNOW THAT I DON'T WANT OTHER SISTERS OR PARENTS OR FRIENDS TO LOSE A LOVED ONE, SO I TAKE THAT ON, YOU KNOW, TO SPREAD AWARENESS BECAUSE I CAN BE THAT VOICE FOR SOME PEOPLE.

>> YEAH WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU BECOME OVERWHELMED WITH THE WORK?

IT SEEMS LIKE FROM 9-5 YOUR HELPING TO ADVOCATE AND EDUCATING AND SUPPORTING THOSE THAT NEED HELP OR ASSISTANCE IN UP WITH FORM OR THE OTHER, RIGHT?

AND THEN FROM A COMMUNITY PERSPECTIVE YOU LEAVE THERE BUT YOU ARE ALSO DOING VERY SIMILAR WORK IN THIS ARENA THAT IS VERY NEAR AND DEAR TO YOUR HEART, SO WHAT DOES EMILY DO WHEN SHE GETS OVERWHELMED?

>> I EAT MY FEELINGS USUALLY.

I LIKE TO BAKE.

BUT I ALSO THINK IT'S IMPORTANT TO KNOW YOUR OWN LIMITS WHEN I KNOW IT'S TOO MUCH, I TAKE A STEP BACK.

IT HAS BEEN HARD BUT I KNOW I'M ONLY ONE PERSON SO ASKING FOR HELP IS OKAY AND NOT TAKING ON EVERYONE'S PROBLEMS BUT SUGGESTING WAYS OR OTHER SERVICES PEOPLE THAT THEY CAN SPEAK TO IF THEY NEED HELP.

BECAUSE A LOT OF MENTAL HEALTH CONVERSATIONS ARE HEAVY AND I WANT TO BE AS HELPFUL AS I CAN BUT IT'S ALSO NOT GOOD FOR MY OWN MENTAL HEALTH TO TAKE ON EVERYONE ELSE'S AS WELL.

>> SO LEARNING HOW TO SET THOSE BOUNDARIES.

>> YES.

>> AND THAT'S SOMETHING SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO DO.

>> IT'S REALLY HARD AND I'M A PEOPLE PLEASE YOU ARE AND I THINK IT'S THE BIG SISTER IN ME, TOO, THAT WANTS TO JUMP IN AND TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING WHICH I TEND TO DO MORE OFTEN THAN NOT.

ASKING FOR HELP IS OKAY.

PRIORITIZING YOUR OWN MENTAL HEALTH IS OKAY.

AND JUST KNOWING WHEN YOU ARE AT YOUR LIMITS I THINK IS REALLY IMPORTANT.

>> WHEN YOU-- DO YOU HAVE ANY OTHER SIBLINGS?

>> YES, I HAVE ANOTHER YOUNGER BROTHER AND ANOTHER YOUNGER SISTER.

>> WAS THERE A HUGE AGE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN REED AND THEM?

>> LIKE FOUR YEARS, THREE YEARS.

SO DO THEY HAVE THEIR OWN MEMORY IES OF HIM?

>> YES.

IS THERE A DIFFERENCE I'M IMAGINING BEING IN SUPPORT OF THEM AND DOING THE WORK THAT IS REQUIRED TO SUPPORT AND EDUCATE OTHERS IN THE COMMUNITY.

>> I THINK WITH HIGH FAMILY IT HAS BEEN IMPORTANT THAT WE CONTINUE TO TALK ABOUT REED SO WE STILL SHARE FUNNY STORIES OR ANNOYING THINGS HE DID AND PHOTOS AND VIDEOS OF MEMORIES.

I THINK TALKING ABOUT HIM IS REALLY AN IMPORTANT THING FOR ALL OF US.

BUT THEN WE ALL WENT THROUGH THIS GRIEF TOGETHER, BUT GRIEF IN ITSELF IS A VERY ISOLATING SINGULAR EXPERIENCE.

SO SUPPORTING ONE ANOTHER THROUGH GRIEF HAS BEEN DIFFICULT BECAUSE YOU ARE GRIEVING YOURSELF.

AND EACH OF US HAS A DIFFERENT ROLE THAT HE PLAYED IN OUR LIFE AND A LITTLE PIECE THAT WE ARE MISSING.

SO JUST BEING THERE FOR ONE ANOTHER, I THINK, HAS BEEN IMPORTANT.

AND KNOWING THAT WE ARE ALL MISSING HIM BUT MAYBE WE ARE MISSING HIM IN A LITTLE BIT OF A DIFFERENT WAY.

>> DIFFERENT WAY.

RIGHT.

AND I'M GOING TO SWITCH NOW AND ABOUT OF WE CONTINUE ON WITH THIS CONVERSATION, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ONE OF THE EXAMPLES OF HOW EMILY IS USING HER BROTHER'S LEGACY TO RAISE AWARENESS FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION.

>> JOINING THE WESTHILL WARRIORS ANOTHER FIELD TONIGHT AS HONORARY CAPTAIN, EMILY, RILEY AND EDEN DARRENBACHER IN MEMORY OF THEIR BROTHER, REED.

IF YOU ARE OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW IS STRUGGLING EMOTIONALLY OR HAS CONCERNS ABOUT THEIR MENTAL HEALTH, PLEASE REACH OUT.

>> TONIGHT WE ARE AT WESTHILL HIGH SCHOOL FOR THE HOMECOMING GAME AND THEY ARE ACKNOWLEDGING MY BROTHER REED, WHO ATTENDED WESTHILL AND PLAYED FOOTBALL HERE.

>> REED WAS A MEMBER OF WESTHILL'S CLASS OF 2014, AND EMBODIED WHAT IT MEANT TO BE A TRUE WARRIOR.

AS A THREE-YEAR STARTING QUARTERBACK WEARING THE NUMBER 8... >> HAVING HIM AS THE STARTING QUARTERBACK CAPTAIN OF THE FOOTBALL TEAM REALLY CHANGE WHAT A LOT OF PEOPLE THOUGHT MENTAL HEALTH AND SUICIDE REALLY LOOKS LIKE.

SO HAVING THESE EVENTS AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO RAISE AWARENESS IS REALLY IMPORTANT TO US.

TONIGHT THERE WAS A TENT SET UP FOR REED'S FAMILY AND FRIENDS AS WELL AS SOME OF HIS CLASSMATES AND FORMER TEAMMATES TO COME TOGETHER AND WATCH THE GAME.

THEY ALSO WERE WEARING A DECAL THAT WE DESIGNED WITH REED'S NAME, HIS INITIALS AND HIS NUMBER ON IT ON ALL OF THE FOOTBALL HELMETS AND THEY HAVE ALLOWED US TO HAVE DIFFERENT MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES TO SHARE WITH PEOPLE COMING TO THE GAME.

ON OUR SLEEVE IS 988, WHICH IS THE NEW SUICIDE CRISIS LINE NUMBER THAT WENT INTO EFFECT JUST THIS YEAR IN 2022.

SO JUST LIKE EVERYONE KNOWS 911 TO CALL IN AN EMERGENCY, 988 IS GOING TO CONNECT PEOPLE EITHER THROUGH PHONE CALL OR TEXT MESSAGE TO A CRISIS COUNSELOR THAT CAN CONNECT THEM TO RESOURCES IN THEIR AREA, AND CAN JUST BE SOMEONE TO TALK TO AND HELP YOU THROUGH A DIFFICULT TIME.

SO WE DO THIS EVENT.

THIS IS THE FIRST YEAR WE HAVE DONE IT.

THIS IS EIGHT YEARS SINCE HE PLAYED AND EIGHT IS A BIG NUMBER FOR US BECAUSE THAT WAS HIS JERSEY NUMBER.

WE ALSO PARTICIPATED IN A NUMBER OF LOCAL EVENTS AND WALKS FOR DIFFERENT ORGANIZATIONS.

AND WE GIVE A SCHOLARSHIP AWAY EVERY YEAR TO A GRADUATING SENIOR FROM WESTHILL HIGH SCHOOL AND IT'S A SCHOLARSHIP BUT IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THEIR GRADES.

IT'S MORE ABOUT WHO THEY ARE AND HOW THEY TREAT PEOPLE.

REED WAS SOMEONE WHO WAS REALLY KIND AND LOOKED OUT FOR EVERYONE.

SO THAT WHAT IS WE FOCUS ON.

>> ON BEHALF OF REED'S FAMILY, FRIENDS, CLASSMATES AND TEAMMATES AS WELL AS EACH OF YOU, WE WOULD LIKE TO THANK THE WESTHILL FOOTBALL TEAM AND ATHLETIC DEPARTMENT TO ALLOWING US TO CELEBRATE WITH YOU TONIGHT.

WE ARE HONORED AND GRATEFUL FOR ALL YOU ARE DOING TO BRING ATTENTION TO MENTAL HEALTH.

PLEASE TAKE A LOOK AT OUR PROGRAM AND KNOW THAT IT IS ALWAYS OKAY TO ASK FOR HELP.

>> EVEN WHEN REED DIED, I DIDN'T STOP BEING HIS BIG SISTER SO THERE ARE THINGS IN HIS MEMORY I WANT TO KEEP ALIVE, THERE ARE CONVERSATIONS I WANT TO CONTINUE HAVING.

I ALSO WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT OTHER PEOPLE DON'T GO THROUGH WHAT MY FAMILY HAS GONE THROUGH.

SO IF WE CAN TALK ABOUT WHO REED WAS AND IF WE CAN SPREAD AWARENESS, THAT'S REALLY KIND OF MY BIGGEST MISSION RIGHT NOW.

>> YOU ARE A STRONG SISTER.

>> I TRY TO BE.

IN THE SENSE OF DOING THIS WORK TO SUPPORT YOUR BROTHER, BUT ALSO DOING THE WORK IN SUPPORTING YOUR COMMUNITY, AND SO CAN YOU TALK TO US A LITTLE BIT ABOUT REED'S WARRIORS AND THEN I'M GOING TO ASK YOU ONE OTHER QUESTION.

>> YEAH, SO REED'S WARRIORS, WARRIORS WAS THE NAME OF HIS SCHOOL MASCOT AND HE WAS THE CAPTAIN OF THE FOOTBALL TEAM, SO WARRIORS IS JUST KIND OF THE GROUP NAME THAT WE TOOK ON AS THE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO CELEBRATE HIS LIFE AND REMEMBER HIS LEGACY.

AND THEN IN TIME I LEARNED THAT WARRIORS MEANS SOMEONE THAT IS GOING THROUGH A STRUGGLE OR CONFLICT.

SO I THOUGHT THAT REALLY KIND OF SUMMED UP REED.

SO REED'S WARRIORS IS JUST LIKE I SAID, THE GROUP OF US THAT REMEMBER AND CELEBRATE HIM SO WE DO THE FOOTBALL GAME THIS YEAR IN CELEBRATION OF HIM.

REED HAD SOME OTHER GAMES AND TOURNAMENTS.

THAT'S WHAT WE CALL OUR TEAM WITH WE GET TOGETHER FOR WALKS AND DIFFERENT FUNDRAISERS IN THE COMMUNITY.

SO IT'S US.

IT'S THE PEOPLE THAT LOVED AND CELEBRATE REED.

>> HOW HAVE YOU FOUND THIS WORK IMPACTING DIFFERENT COMMUNITIES?

AND OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE WHO MAY BE STRUGGLING?

>> I THINK THAT PUTTING IT OUT THERE AND SHARING WHO REED WAS ONLINE, ON SOCIAL MEDIA, GIVES A LITTLE BIT MORE OF A FACE AND SOMETHING TANGIBLE TO SUICIDE WHEN IT'S JUST THE THOUGHT THAT IS OUT THERE.

SO I THINK PEOPLE, AT LEAST I HOPE, THAT HAS KNOWN REED OR KNOWN OF REED ARE MORE COMFORTABLE HAVING THOSE CONVERSATIONS ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH EITHER ABOUT THEIR OWN MENTAL HEALTH OR LOOKING OUT FOR THOSE PEOPLE IN THEIR LIVES.

I HOPE THAT BECAUSE WE SHARE HIM, THAT OTHERS, YOU KNOW, FEEL THEY CAN DO THE SAME.

>> WHAT ARE SOME GO TO MAYBE THREE TIPS THAT YOU WOULD GIVE SOMEONE WHO IS STRUGGLING WITH SUICIDE?

>> I THINK THE FIRST IS JUST TO KNOW THAT THEY'RE NOT ALONE IN IT; THAT WE ALL GO THROUGH BAD DAYS, HARD TIMES.

AND IT SEEMS LIKE YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE THAT IS MAYBE HAVING THAT BAD DAY, BUT YOU'RE NOT.

AND SO THE FIRST IS KNOWING YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

I WOULD SAY THE SECOND IS HAVING PEOPLE IN THEIR LIVES THAT THEY CAN GO TO.

YOU DON'T HAVE TO COME AND SAY, YOU KNOW, EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING ON, BUT JUST HAVING SOMEONE THAT YOU CAN GO TO AND SAY I'M HAVING A HARD TIME, AND HAVING PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE KNOW THAT ARE THERE AND ABLE TO SUPPORT YOU IN THAT.

AND I THINK THIRD IS KNOWING SOME OF THE RESOURCES THAT ARE OUT THERE.

I DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING THAT EXISTED IN THE COMMUNITY RELATED TO MENTAL HEALTH OR TO SUICIDE.

IT'S ALL THINGS I'VE LEARNED AFTER LOSING REED.

AND I THINK IT WOULD HAVE BEEN REALLY GREAT TO HAVE THOSE THINGS BEFOREHAND.

SO KNOWING THE DIFFERENT ORGANIZATIONS IN THE COMMUNITY, EVEN KNOWING THE CRISES IS LINE-- THE CRISIS LINE I THINK IS REALLY IMPORTANT.

>> SO THE CRISIS LINE.

WHAT ARE MAYBE ONE OR TWO OTHER RESOURCES THAT ARE OUT THERE THAT YOU THINK WOULD BE HELPFUL FOR PEOPLE?

>> SO LOCALLY, CONTACT COMMUNITY SERVICES DOES A LOT, ESPECIALLY IN SCHOOLS.

SO WORKING WITH STUDENTS, I THINK, IS REALLY IMPORTANT.

THERE IS ALSO LOCAL CHAPTERS OF AFSP, THE AMERICAN FOUNDATION FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION.

AND THEY HOST WALKS THAT A LOT OF PEOPLE SEEM TO KNOW ABOUT IN THE AREA AND THEM THERE IS ALSO A NAMI CHAPTER, NATIONAL ALLIANCE OF MENTAL ILLNESS IS IN SYRACUSE AS WELL.

>> ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS THAT YOU SAID TONIGHT WAS KNOWING THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN NEEDING TO SPEND SOME TIME PROCESSING AND THEN KNOWING WHEN IT WAS TIME TO SPEAK UP.

BECAUSE I KNOW A LOT OF TIMES IN AFRICAN-AMERICAN COMMUNITIES, OR WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT THE INTERSECTIONS OF IDENTITY AND THE WAY THAT THE BIPOC COMMUNITY OR THE LGBTQIA COMMUNITY OR WOMEN OR MEN MIGHT BE EXPERIENCING LIFE, YOU KNOW, ALL THESE THINGS ADD ON TO IT.

AND WHEN IT BECOMES TOO MUCH TO BEAR, THE CULTURAL STIGMA IS ALSO ASSOCIATED WITH SUICIDE, RIGHT?

AND THE GUILT OR THE AINGT THAT PEEL HAVE-- ANGST THAT PEOPLE HAVE TALKING ABOUT IT.

SO AS I'M SITTING HERE LISTENING TO YOU, I'M THINKING ABOUT, YOU KNOW, HOW MANY OTHERS HAVEN'T HAD THE LEVEL OF COMFORT ENOUGH OR HAVEN'T GAINED THE CONFIDENCE ENOUGH OR STILL BATTLING THE IDEA OF EVEN STEPPING UP AND SPEAKING OUT ABOUT THEIR LOVED ONE OR LOSING THEIR LOVED ONE AND THE IMPACT OF SUICIDE AND MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES ON THEM.

SO I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR THE BRAVERY IT TAKES TO BE A REED WARRIOR, BUT ALSO, YOU KNOW, BEING SOMEONE THAT HAS HAD TO DEAL WITH THE IMPACT "BEHIND THE WOMAN".

AS ALWAYS, I'M YOUR HOST Dr. JUHANNA ROGERS.

AND ON BEHALF OF THE THE "BEHIND THE WOMAN" TEAM, THANK YOU FOR WATCHING AND HAVE A GOOD NIGHT.

NEXT WEEK ON "BEHIND THE WOMAN."

>> I'M EXCITED TO INTRODUCE INDARIA JONES, ME'SHAE BROOKS ROLLING AND VICKI BRACKEN.

ALL OF YOUR BUSINESSES ARE THRIVING IN THIS COMMUNITY.

>> IT'S YOUR BUSINESS, IT'S YOUR BABY BUT IT'S NOT REALLY FOR YOU.

IT'S FOR, YOU KNOW, THE MASS IS THE MASSES AND PEOPLE THAT NEED IT.

>> BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT VALUED DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU ARE NOT VALUABLE.

>> BE FOCUSED AND UNDERSTAND WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH.

>> EVERY BUSINESS SOLVES A CRUCIAL PROBLEM.