- Hi, I am Hermene Hartman with "N'DIGO STUDIO."

There's some new research from Kidsave International revealing a need for foster care procedures to change.

One in three Black Americans have thought a lot about fostering a child, that's 10% higher than the average of other racial groups.

22% of Black minors are in foster care.

Black children are less likely to be adopted than white children.

Younger children are more likely to be adopted.

And research has shown that pairing Black children with Black parents increases the success rate of the adoption process because it promotes culturally responsive foster care environment.

We're going to talk about foster care and adoption today with people who are experts.

Deborah Brown Farmer, she is a foster care and an adoptive mother, and she has written what her journey has been.

We're also going to talk to Ronald Smith.

Ronald Smith was a policeman and now he's a social worker, and has been with something called Fatherhood International.

And we're going to talk to Claude Robinson.

He works with the foster care system and the process, and recently has just adopted a migrant family.

Cozy conversations drop the knowledge That's For Real... Funding for this program was provided by Illinois Student Assistance Commission The Chicago Community Trust.

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Deborah Brown, welcome, welcome, and welcome.

- Thank you, thank you, and thank you.

- So tell me, and I want you to share your personal journey, of how you adopted a young boy, and took him from foster care to becoming an adoptive parent.

- Absolutely, thank you for having me.

So I was actually introduced to the foster care system in the late nineties.

And I was working in television here in Chicago, and there was an organization called UCAN that would bring young people to the station.

And so the person that worked in that capacity was Claude Robinson.

He would bring in these young people to get an experience of what it looked like to shadow someone in the profession that I was in, which was media.

And so I just asked him, "Hey, I wanna volunteer.

How do you connect me with your organization so that I can mentor?"

And he connected me with a young lady that was in foster care.

It was literally to be a one-year commitment of me helping her with her homework.

And 26 years later, I am still in her life.

I knew at that very moment meeting her when she was in foster care, that that was something that I wanted to do, which was to foster a child.

I did not know that it would become my only option later in life, and I, again, went through the process of getting my foster care license.

After getting my foster care license, then I was placed with a child through One Hope United, and then I, a year later, ended up adopting that child through foster care.

- So, Claude, you've been working with the foster care system for a while.

So, as Deborah has just explained, you're kind of matched a kid for a mentoring situation, not a foster care situation.

- Yes.

- Tell me how this works.

You have to have a license in order to be a foster care parent?

- Yes.

- How does that work?

- So in the situation with the young lady, Sharina, we were looking to help her academically.

And automatically, then Deborah wanted to mentor her.

So I was like, "What about just tutoring, you know, to get involved?"

And that was what we wanted to do.

So it would be a background check on the candidate looking to get in and be a foster parent, or a tutor, or volunteer, anything.

You go through a extensive background check, drug test, and things like that, because you're with children who are part of the child welfare system.

So it can work in a number of different ways.

And then, if you wanna go and then become a foster parent, then that's a more extensive thing that happens.

Yeah, a whole lot, you know, that goes on with training and, matching and things like that.

Okay.

So it becomes a higher grade of training.

Yes.

Got a graduate to that, right?

Yeah, yeah.

Ronald Smith, you have, through your fraternity, Omega Phi Psi, you have a program that mentors children throughout, Black boys in particular, throughout the world called Fatherhood International.

Tell me about that.

- Well, Omega Psi Phi Fraternity, Incorporated has a fatherhood initiative.

And each chapter throughout the United States and abroad goes to schools and the members mentor them, reading books, helping them with their homework, just giving them life skills and listening to them.

That's one of the most important things that we need to do with our youth, is listen to them, and then go with whatever they decide they want to do with their lives.

- So you all had a town hall meeting last evening, and I was your moderator.

And, Richard, you said something consistently, "It takes love and it takes patience."

- It takes two things to be a foster parent, and it's not money.

It is that love and patience.

- A lot of love, a lot of patience.

- [Richard] A lot of love, a lot of patience.

- So, Deborah, you've also authored a book, "My Journey to Joshua" and "From Fears to Families."

They're both powerful resource books.

It's not just your story, but it becomes a resource for others who might be interested.

Talk about your book about Joshua.

- Yeah, so the premise behind the book, honestly, when I went through the process, when I, again, met Sharina, I knew this is what I wanted to do later in life, when I went through the process, I told my friends, I told some of my family members.

And I had so many people asking questions or saying to me, "Oh, I've always wanted to do that," and they never did it.

And so, for me, it was like, "Wow, why are they not doing this?"

And so with "My Journey to Joshua," it was really to talk about what love was.

So it's more a memoir about love.

My grandmother was old school.

I'm a Johnny Coleman baby through and through.

But my grandmother had this motto that like, "What's love got to do with it?"

And that's not true, love has a lot to do with it.

And so I realized that that was actually my compass when it came to relationships.

And so I actually learned love through my process of adopting my son Joshua.

And so that's what that first book is about.

And then, the second book, Josh is now eight years old, okay.

- You've had Josh for how long?

- Since the birth of Joshua.

- Since his birth?

- Yes, yes.

And so he's now eight years old.

But when I dial it back, eight years ago, I had friends and family that said, "Oh, this is something I wanna do," and they never did it.

And so this is not to shame them, this is just to put awareness around there's some fear there.

What is that fear?

And so "Fears to Families" is really a toolkit to help them step by step, how do you get your foster care license?

Background check, you know, going through the training classes and things of that sort.

Also, other resources, again, some information about others that have gone through this process.

You know, pop culture, we can talk about in my childhood, we learned about foster care and adoption through watching shows like "Diff'rent Strokes," right?

"Webster," "Punky Brewster."

And so I don't necessarily know that people are doing the research, and so that's what this toolkit is.

It allows them to walk away with a guide to help them get from the fears that they have to the families that they desire.

- Walk me through how you move from the foster care process to adoption.

- Sure, and every case it's different, it's not a cookie-cutter approach.

And so, in my case, I had a young child that was birthed by a mom that they knew was not fit to keep this child.

There were other children in the system that were in foster care as well.

And so I was blessed, I won't say lucked up.

I was blessed enough to have a situation where the dad's rights were terminated.

We had to go through the judicial system where we went to court month after month so that those rights can be terminated.

And then, once they were terminated, I was then able to adopt him.

- Okay, so it's foster care to adoption?

- Yes, and I'll share this, most people don't know that, and I will be quite honest with you, I didn't even know it at the time.

It was doing research, having, again, friends like Ron, who was the licensing rep for me at the time, to educate me on this.

Because most people assume that you have to privately adopt, and that's not the only option.

- That's the only one option?

- Mhmm.

- Okay, so, Claude, one of the things that I found out in preparing for the show is that 22% of all Black children are in foster care.

Tell me how that happens, that's a very high number.

- Sure, in the total complex of things, young people who've been abused and neglected, and then the state steps in to either remove them or make decisions on where the child is going to be.

- So before a foster care parent takes the child, where is the child?

- Usually in the home, or they may be with a child welfare organization, a group home, wherever the state is trying to help the young person stabilize themselves.

And then, they look to place them with viable foster homes.

So they can be with family members.

A coach can say that they wanna go through the process and become a foster parent.

And then, you look to, hopefully, adoption becomes where that can happen.

But you're really looking to try and reunify the young person either home, or if it's the foster home, that they can actually get what they need, then that will become the option, the home that they will be in.

- How many children in America do we have under the foster care system?

- Yeah, that's a great question.

The number is more than 391,000.

- Almost 400,000?

- Yes, in the foster care system.

And then, here in Illinois, about 20 years ago, the number was about 57,000 youth that were a part of the Department of Children and Family Services.

There were some laws that were put in place, some policies to try and minimize that number.

- It's close to 20,000.

There's 400,000 youth in care throughout the United States of America.

100,000 are eligible for adoption.

5%, almost 20%, are in the state of Illinois alone.

And the majority of that 20,000, that 5%, are within the Chicagoland area.

- Now, Black children harder to place than white children, why?

- It's a really good question.

And Ron and I were talking about that back and forth.

There are a number of reasons why.

One is that people don't value Black children like they value white children, is one.

- Is there a age difference?

Are little children more likely to be placed than say teens?

- Yes, teenagers are harder to place, unfortunately, because they're harder, I would say, to educate on dealing with the society that we would like them to conform to or just be a part of.

It's easier to place babies.

They don't have any preconceived notions.

They don't have any- - [Hermene] They don't have any habits yet?

- They don't have any habits, yes.

- Mhmm, no behavior yet.

- And if I can add to that, I think that's the other part too with the book, because I think most people have this ego-based approach to it, right?

You just assume that you're gonna get a child that's older, that's gonna come with all these problems, and that may not be the case.

You can get a newborn that comes with all these problems if the child is, you know, the parent was on drugs or any other issues.

So we just seem to make up these stories that are not actually factual.

- Mhmm, mhmm.

You went to the UK.

- Yes, I did.

- To look at their system.

- Yes.

- What did you find?

What did you discover?

- Yeah, it was interesting.

You know, you go with an agenda, you're an expert in violence prevention and youth development, and I was blown away by the culture.

Two things in particular stuck out.

How they approached violence prevention, and they look at how guns are a bad thing.

In both Scotland and in England, they don't really have a gun problem at all.

They have a knife problem.

And they were trying to minimize the amount of intimate violence that was happening with knives.

So the gun piece, they were really astounded by the number of deaths, 30,000 here in America.

And then, when we were in Manchester, there were 32 people that were killed in that year.

- 32 in the year?

- In a year.

- That's a week in Chicago.

- A day in some instances.

- A day in some cases.

- Then the other thing I learned when we met with their child welfare group was that they hold young people in such high regard, and they wanna make sure they have every resource for the family and for the young person so that they know how, a human-centered approach to ensure that young person is successful in life.

And I noticed how girls, younger girls, and I would see them going to school, how they carried themselves.

And I was like, "Hold on."

I go, "Are you noticing kind of how it seems like they hold their heads up and things like that?"

- Self-esteem.

- And just graceful and things like that.

And I was like, "That's something that's missing."

You know, "Somebody's teaching them that."

- Charm school, that's what they call it.

Charm school.

- I was going to say, that was charm school.

- I mean, my dad's from Barbados, so the British, I understand that influence.

It is charm school.

- Is it taught in school or is it a extracurricular school?

- Home, school, to the end of the placing of the table, you know, so those types of things, kids are struggling to cut their pancakes here.

You know, and they know exactly which fork to use, which knife to use.

It's taught in the home, it's taught in the schools.

It's part of the culture.

- Yes.

- And to that point, I just think, when we look at solutions to the problem, is adults really aligning some meaningful values, some cultural values, that will sustain the young people over time, in spite of what they've gone through.

- So you think we oughta have charm school in school?

- We do, we do, and so, interestingly enough, when I was at NBC, I would do charm classes for nonprofit organizations, because most cases these kids had cotillions to go to, they had to go to prom.

- Prom.

- They had to go to, you know, homecoming.

And they didn't know how to conduct themselves in those types of environments.

And so, yes, absolutely mandatory.

- Don't go away because there's more to come that's something I wish I could revamp the school system with so much I would do that.

it's just it's just goes lacking.

It just goes missing.

From your experience, how can community members just.

how can community members, just Joe Blow community person, just Jane Doe community person, help with the process of fostering children?

- I believe that everyone can have a very viable impact within the foster care system by just volunteering, giving their time.

Time is a valuable commodity.

And our children, when they see that someone's taken a vested interest in them, act better, perform better, want to know more, and be more inquisitive.

And teaching them the way they should go, should be the norm.

- And, Ron, don't you think part of that, when we think about the young people, some of the research that talks about ACEs, adverse childhood experiences, they say that if a young person has one consistent and caring adult in their lives, that's what they need to move through and be successful.

- So one of the things that I actually did not know and learned from your community project last evening was that some of these kids go from one home, six months, new home, another six months, new home.

And that is very impactful, because it means, "I'm not only in a new home, I'm with new people, I'm with another environment, new schools."

- And let's talk about how they get there too.

- That's a vicious cycle.

- In garbage bags, Hermene.

I mean, they're dignity is gone.

You pick them up, you stuff all their stuff and scrap it in a bag, and then you drop them off.

That was my, again, passion with Sharina, 'cause that was her case.

She was home after home.

- How does the process happen?

How do you go to a, I'm in a foster home, then I'm not.

And then, six months later, I'm in another... What's the revolving door?

- I'd like to start off that most people don't know, there's a preventative measure before the child even gets to the foster care system, and it's what we have called Intact Family Services.

Where when the hotline call is made and the DCFS goes to the home, they don't immediately take the child out of the home just because there's an allegation made.

They find out what's going on.

Maybe the mom, or the parents, or the father don't have food in the home.

Well, we're gonna get you some food.

Maybe you need a ride somewhere, or just a job referral, or another place to live.

Those are adequate resources that are held before children are brought into the system.

They try to remain them intact with the family.

And if that's not a viable option, they find family members who could temporarily care for the child while the parents are getting their stuff together for the child to return home.

If that's not a viable option, staying with the biological parents, going with relatives, then the child is brought into the system where they're placed with nonrelatives in the foster care system.

- So there's a preliminary system before the foster child?

- Yes.

- One of the things, Claude, that you relate is crime behavior to the foster child.

Give me that correlation.

- So think about being a part of a system and you've been moved around, and you've really had problems trusting adults, and it's justified in a lot of ways.

- Angry behavior, perhaps?

- Some would call it maladaptive.

But the behavior is the behavior because of the circumstances they've been through.

And then, with that, they have to find viable means to survive often.

You know, if I can't be in a foster home, then they're homeless, then a lot of times they're looking at ways just to literally survive.

So if it's sex trafficking, if it's prostitution, selling drugs, getting involved in all of these other negative behaviors that tends to happen.

And here, in Illinois, the age is 21 when young people are emancipated from the system.

And then, I think downstate it's 18, Ron, is it?

- We expanded to 21.

When I license foster parents, it's from zero to 21, and there's different parameters to get to the age of 21.

If the child at the age of 18, they graduate from high school, continue on with their education at a state college, which the department and the state will fund for them to continue their education.

- Right, so I would say they are trying to survive.

And whatever opportunities they can to just make it day to day, hour to hour- - Make it an hour away.

- That's what's going on.

- Just to piggyback on that, every child that comes into the child welfare system is traumatized.

Whether they're a newborn, seven or eight years old, or teenagers, they're traumatized.

So they're looking for that family atmosphere.

They just want to be loved and to be safe, loved and safe.

And then, you go from that foundation and you build up.

but those are those are your two basics.

Yes.

So we have a new element in society now and that is migrants.

We've got a lot of migrant children here.

Will they or do they incorporate into the foster care system?

Do they qualify for the foster care system?

No, I would say no.

Yeah.

No, I.

Don't think.

So.

So I can with the whole migrant crisis that's happening right now, the city, the state.

And, I think the country that where migrants are being bussed to are trying to figure figure it out.

- Deb, what advice would you give to someone watching this program who said, "I would like to adopt"?

What would you tell them to do?

- I think to do just what Claude said, is to follow your heart.

I think, you know, especially for women, we're natural nurturers.

Like, just listening to that story, my heart is pounding out of my chest.

I think that for you to follow your heart, pray about it, of course, and then do your research.

I don't believe that we should suppress what's natural.

- Let's say you don't wanna adopt or you don't wanna a foster child, but you do want to mentor.

How do you get involved in that process?

- I'm just gonna throw some organizations out there.

The National Youth Advocate Program, One Hope United, UCAN, Lawrence Hall, the Illinois Collaboration on Youth.

There are a number of resources that are out there.

- Who advocates for the foster child?

- Yeah, and that was part of the panel we had yesterday, which was CASA, right?

And so the Court Appointed Special Advocates, they advocate for children in foster care that their objective is, again, with foster care, to reunite the people, the kids with their families.

And so CASA, they serve as an advocate for children going through the legal system.

- Have we seen a breakdown in the American family?

- Yeah.

- You don't have to get married anymore to have a baby.

We see gay rights prevailing.

What happened?

Where's our breakdown?

How do we fix it?

- I'm a retired police officer and I started mentoring while I was a police officer, and that's how I got into this field of social work.

I came from a two-parent family home.

Both my parents were college educated.

We grew up on the west side of Chicago.

They made sure that my education was priority in my life.

And not only did they make sure, but they showed me the way.

And I think that's one part of the solution that we all should have and look forward to and strive for.

And even though if we not have that family dynamic, volunteerism is should be more rampant.

Thank you for vibrant conversation and for some wonderful information.

and for some wonderful information.

Deborah, I'm so proud of you.

- Thank you very much.

- Because you decided to be a mother and you made it happen.

And, Ronald, the wonderful work that you do, we don't have many policemen that go into social work.

- Thank you, appreciate it.

- It usually might happen the other way around, but we don't have that transformation.

And, Claude, thank you very much for the work that you do with foster care.

- Yes.

- It's wonderful that you've adopted a migrant family.

While we were doing the show, we did a show on migrants, and we went into the police stations inside.

We see outside, but you should see inside.

And I saw a young girl, she had to be 16, all of 16, and she was nursing her baby.

And I had to stop, I teared up, I wanted to take that baby so bad and say, "Just give me this baby, and you go make your way.

But let me take this child from you."

And I felt myself kind of going- - But we used to do that.

- There you go.

- We stopped doing that.

- And then, I said, "No, I'ma get in trouble all over the place.

Let me not do that."

And, wow.

We can do better.

- Mhmm.

- Yes.

- Our humanness can be better.

Hey, this is "N'DIGO STUDIO," and I wanna thank you for watching tonight.

I hope you learned something.

I hope you got something out of this conversation.

Thank you for being with us.

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