Previously on Girl Unscripted.

Well, first, how did you get involved in being in the filmmaking program?

My truant officer referred it to me.

I've known three people who have had a kid and they were either in...

I guess two of them were in middle school, and one of them is my friend.

So how many foster homes have you lived in so far?

I can't, I cannot see your mouth at all.

I'm countin'.

Okay.

Every girl, regardless of where she lives, one bad decision will send her to the wrong direction.

What're you doing?

Just sitting there?

Yeah.

You feeling better?

A little.

A little?

You're not acting quite all right.

She's always acting this way.

Stop, Courtney!

Hello.

Bre, Bre, Bre.

What?

It's my birthday today.

Say hi.

(Hush now.

Dont break the silence.)

When we were putting the reunion together, we tried and tried again and tried again to locate Jessie when even her caseworkers didn't know where she might be anymore.

We really got into a panic.

We had no idea where she might be.

We were very fortunate that one of my teammates happened to be reading the newspaper on Sunday and happened to see a four-part series on Jessie's life.

Jessie had been living in different homes, different foster homes.

She actually moved to three other foster homes directly after that and ended up having to go to court case.

The judge gave us a court order that said that Jessie could return for 2008 because she had actually spoken about how much she liked the program without any, anybody even asking.

She had told people that she had really, truly had fun and loved the program.

(--remains just as they should.

Hush now.)

Why did you end up leaving Amanda's and Brad's?

And then where have you lived since then?

Up until now, from last year?

I lived everywhere, mostly.

Too many places.

I just, you know, was wondering, like, how, how you're kind of dealing with everything?

How do you how do you feel now?

How you're making kind of through every day?

Just, um... Do you ever think about the future?

No?

You just think about just today and just getting through just today?

Can you imagine, like, that the people, the mentors and stuff from the filmmaking program and Miss Deborah and Miss Nancy and I, we think about you every single day and they've been trying to find you for...seven months, and we finally found you.

It took us seven months to figure out where you were, 'cause we really wanted you to come back to the filmmaking program this year.

And we think about you all the time and love you.

Want to send you stuff so that you know that we love you.

Did you know that?

My birthday was July 10th.

It was July 10th?

See, if I stayed in touch with you, I could send you birthday presents and Christmas presents.

If we stayed in touch.

If I can, I can send you cards.

But you know what it would take for us to stay in touch?

That I would call you, and then you'd have to talk to me on the phone.

You'd have to say, "Hi."

Would you like to stay in touch?

You would?

I want you to send me something for my 13th birthday.

Okay.

And even though it's already passed, I'll still send you something.

And a present.

And a present.

Okay.

I could do that.

Okay.

Ready?

Shame, shame, shame.

I don't wanna go to Mexico no more, more, more.

There's a big, fat [unintelligible] at the door, door, door.

He grabbed me by the collar, made me pay a dollar.

I don't wanna go to Mexico no more, more.

Shame!

I said it.

You did it first.

I know.

Okay, another one.

Okay.

Welcome to McDonald's.

May I take your order?

Whatcha doin'?

Hello?

Hi.

What's up?

[unintelligible] I didn't even...it doesn't even say that it's calling me.

What?

Hey, Pearl?

So.

Hey, you want dinner?

You want to hang out?

What you up to?

She's gone.

Hello, hello hello.

Pearl!

Gone like that.

[unintelligible] This is Tara.

I don't want to leave town without seeing you, man.

And, uh, don't think you need to be any certain way, Pearl.

Like, really.

Seriously.

Life's too hard for that s * * *.

You know?

So.

Mostly I just want to give you a hug and "I love yous."

Bye-uh.

Dorm or Dairy Queen?

Dorm, right?

It's at Missouri Western.

[singing] Thinkin' "Pearl, please say yes."

My gosh, she's so funny, though.

Really, like, she's hysterical.

Damn it.

This is when it, usually...this is when they usually go back off line.

Right in this moment.

Come on.

Oh my God, I'm sweating, I'm so nervous.

Come on, Pearl.

All right, so now we have to make a decision.

Do we wait for Pearl or get out and go here?

She just read it.

Magic dust please work.

Come on, Pearl.

On my way.

Go!

On my way.

On my way.

Come on in.

We're going right now.

[screaming with joy] [unintelligible] How are you?

Cameron!

Hi!

Nice to meet you!

Can you tell us your first and your last name.

Barbara Styles.

Okay, so go back and tell me how you guys know each other again.

She's my foster mom.

How long has Pearl been living with you?

Two years.

And how many months?

About two and a half years.

How many days?

How many hours?

I had four children, and I always worried about who would take care of my children if something happened to me.

I guess I got that nurturing thing, cuz, like I even go... Any time I go into a plant shop and there's a plant that needs help, I buy it and bring it home and nurture it.

So I guess that's why I was put on this earth, I don't know.

When you're 20 years old, what would you like to be doing?

I, I want to be in college, hopefully.

I do either want to become a photographer or a pediatrician.

So I really don't know yet.

I haven't decided which one.

I don't want to go to school forever, though.

So it's like, what's your shortest amount of time?

Barb's number one saying to me is, "For a straight-A student, you absolutely have no common sense."

That's funny.

Pearl's struggle is that she wants to be with her dad.

She cannot be with her dad.

As I have tried to explain to Pearl, and so has her counselor and other people, that as she becomes an adult and she revisits her dad, probably within a week to a month, she'll never speak to him again.

Uh, if I had the chance, I would go back to my dad in a heartbeat, not because of the abuse and stuff that I got, but because I miss him a whole lot.

No, you won't.

Madison gettin' ready to ride the four wheeler.

Don't fall!

I'm Wendy Herrod.

Courtney.

We know you.

We've seen you lots.

Tell me who you live with right now.

Melanie, Eric, Wendy, Courtney, Tanner, and Aiden.

Do you know what you want to do, or where, what your career goals are?

Crime scene investigator or an FBI agent.

That is fascinating.

I know.

That's a great career goal!

Oh, that's fascinating!

That'd be exciting.

Madison, what about you?

Teacher.

You're gonna be a teacher?

What are some other ideas that you have for career goals?

I don't have any other ideas.

And what were the circumstances that you said, "Come live with me!

I want, I, you guys have to come here, please?

” Besides their awesome smiles.

I know.

And she has that smile.

It's un, you guys have great smiles.

And those dimples?

I know you love those.

I see it pop out.

I see it pop out.

And then you go, "I got to have them live here."

Yeah.

How's everything been going since you moved in here?

Good.

[Tara laughs] Where are your mom and dad?

I don't know where they're at.

What, do you remember, when's the last time that you were with them?

One or the other.

Five years old.

What was going on?

Do you remember?

Hey, mister!

Get your butt over here!

Now!

Stop taping me, Courtney.

Do you want to go in the stairwell?

Sure.

Okay, let's go in the stairwell.

Pearl's learning a lot right now.

So you lived with your real mom and your real dad until you were six years old.

I was six years old.

But what happened?

What was the reason that you left?

Because my mom and dad was druggies, and they couldn't help it.

They couldn't stop, and everything.

So... What, what kind of drugs were they doing?

Do you know?

I don't know.

My mom told me she was doing meth.

Stopped that, but...I don't know.

They were drinking, and everything.

When's the last time you saw your real mom?

Since...I don't know.

I don't know how long it's been.

A while, huh?

Mm hmm.

So, what's happened in between that period of time, like, between when you were six to now?

Going through different homes.

And going through mess.

Like what kind?

Um, I don't know.

[unintelligible] it's going to get taken.

It's gonna get...

He put, he put his finger in his ear and then he touched it, like, right here where I was eatin' it, and like -- [group noise] Can I have it?

And he rips that part off and he just eats the rest.

You guys want to play a game?

No.

[group noise] What game?

Yeah.

Shut up, I can't... [unintelligible] I'll be here.

Mind if I pull up a chair?

I heard that you were upset.

Can you tell me what's goin' on?

I feel like I don't belong here.

Oh...why?

Why, baby, why?

You do.

Do you know every single person feels like you right now?

I feel like I can't do it.

I feel like, like I don't belong in this kind of a group thing.

Because of the group dynamics?

It's just because I don't get along with girls.

As much as I want to.

Gosh, I remember saying that.

I really can't imagine Madison not being here.

You're my joy.

I love seeing you!

I may not get to hug you first when I come in the door, but I sure want to.

Don't you ever go away?

[laughs] There's that smile!

I knew it was wanting to come out.

I mean, I notice that every time there's some kind of argument or fight, or whatever, that it's really upsetting for you.

Do you do you remember there being lots of fighting and yelling and stuff like that, growing up?

Yeah.

Between your dad and you guys, or your mom and your dad, or...?

Mom and dad.

What happened?

Did your dad beat your mom up, and stuff?

Mm hmm.

They beat you guys up, too?

Oh.

I'm sorry.

Did you like us coming over to your house the other day and doing the interview?

Yep.

What did you guys do afterwards?

Did you talk about it?

Ride the four wheeler.

No.

Was your sister, what'd your sister say after we left?

I don't, I don't know.

I wasn't near her.

Do you think she was annoyed she had to be on camera?

Yes.

She's like, "Madison, why did you make me do this?"

I said, "It wasn't me."

(Disengage the mind.

Turn out almost all the lights.

Blink and focus eyes.

Stop talking, start walking.

Heart steady, drumroll.

Breathing locks the tempo.

A tunnel is the road.

No cooling, keep moving.

A naked stillness, a tempered blindness.)

How did you get your name, Breanna?

It's a beautiful name.

It's Bre-Anna.

She says, Bre-Ahna, but it's Bre-Anna.

Yeah.

Who chose it?

I chose your name.

My grandma did.

I'm playin'.

She did.

So where are you, where are you from?

Tennessee.

What do you guys like to do for fun?

Yeah, I mean...

Send her to work.

I'll stay at work all the time.

You can stay there too.

I'm not gonna lie.

Me and her doesn't get along that well.

We really don't, no.

We're too much alike.

No, no.

Yes, we are.

So what do you like to do with your pop?

Go to the mall, watch him act the fool.

Go to Wal-mart, watch him act the fool.

Um, just watch him make a fool out of himself.

Cuz he's a, he does a good job.

Oh, yeah.

Uh, what are you on probation for right now?

Three counts of manufacturing, delivering, and distributing crack cocaine.

That makes you look bad.

You were totally, it wasn't you.

But it was not me.

They were...I just was at the wrong place at the wrong time.

How old were you in your foster care before?

Um.

Ten?

Eleven?

Me and her father left them with a babysitter, all three of the kids.

And...the story that we was told is the babysitter got on to Breanna, and Breanna didn't like what she said to her and Breanna hit her.

I don't know how true that is.

And then she called DFS.

And so they got taken away, so we had to fight...

They got taken away for abandonment.

That's what they got taken away for.

So we had to fight and get them back.

It was 5:00 in the morning.

It was at a hotel, or whatever.

And, so, she called them, and they came and got us and everything.

And they had them drop for a drug test, and they dropped dirty, so... One of our foster moms put ants in our cereal and everything, and she locked us outside the house, so then my little brother was like, "You better take me McDonald's 'cause I'm hungry."

She wouldn't, so he kicked a dent in her car and peed on it.

So, they split us up.

How did you end up coming from Tennessee to St. Joe, Missouri?

Well, their grandparents that lives down in Missouri never seen them.

So me and my husband, we moved up here, so his mother and father can get to know our kids.

So that's what brought us here.

OK, now you tell her your, what you... Cuz Daddy got shot.

Well, he got shot, too, but...

So [unintelligible] What happened?

Carjacking.

Carjacking.

We matched up on that.

Shot him seven times.

Left him in a ditch to die.

So we moved up here to get a fresh start.

A lot of places here in St. Joe reminds me of home.

There's a lot of friendly people, and I like it better in St. Joe than Kansas City.

I mean, when we first moved to Kansas City, we was going down the freeway and some people calling out n * * * * * lovers, and all that...that's when we first stepped in Kansas City.

So at this play, it is racism.

It's...even my family.

My family doesn't really deal... What was it, your uncle?

With us... Was it your uncle?

Because their dad's black.

Was it your uncle?

What?

No, it's my whole dad's side.

Somebody in her family was a leader of the KKK, the Grand Wizard of the KKK.

So, they don't have, my family really don't have anything...my dad's side have really anything to do with me or my kids.

That's fine, you know.

I don't need 'em.

Me and their dad had to, like, go through so many classes: anger management, drug classes, um, therapy, everything to get 'em back.

And eventually they left it up to me in order to get the kids 'cause they said, my husband's too big and intimidating.

Too big, black, and intimidating.

So I had to leave their dad.

They had me to file a restraining order.

They had me to file for divorce.

I was going to college.

They said I couldn't go to college, work, and take care of my kids.

I had to quit college.

Moved up here to St. Joe.

At that time, we was in Kansas City.

I was here in St. Joe two weeks, and they gave me my kids back.

If you had to describe what being in foster care is like to a kid who's never done it and is about to go in, what would you say it's like?

It sucked.

Because I had to keep beating up my foster mom.

Because she was hittin' me and she kept pullin' my hair.

I was just standin' there, and the boy kept yellin' at me.

So I started yellin' at him, um, yellin' at my foster brother, so then she gon' come pull my hair, so I just turned around and started hittin' her.

And then they was gonna send me to a psycho home.

I was like, alright, whatever...

It was better than her house.

They kept sendin' her to, like, Spotford and Crittenton.

And they kept shooting her up with medicine, and there was nothing wrong with her.

I had a broken ankle, and she didn't take me to hospital for it, so when I did go to Crittenton, they took me, so I had my, um, crutches and everything.

And they kept yellin' at me.

So I threw it at the door, but then he just so happened to walk in right when I threw it and it hit him.

So they send me to the Bubble Room, I wouldn't, I wouldn't stay still for them, so they gonna' shoot me with a needle.

I was mad.

I mean, like I tell them.

They do, they do have anger for me because them being in foster care before.

They have every right to be.

You know.

Kind of like you said, I shoulda protected 'em.

I shoulda been there for 'em.

And I wasn't.

So.

..but...I think this therapy is really helpin' us, though.

I really do.

Well, my real name is Larissa, and I don't know where my mom got it.

Anoela, how 'bout you?

Um, I'm named after the famous plane that dropped the, uh, the atom, atom bomb.

Wow!

How do you feel about that being your name?

Very powerful force.

Very powerful?

When I grow up, I want to be a vet.

When I turn 14 in December, I'm going to go down to the animal shelter and get an application.

I don't want to have kids until, like, I'm in college.

I want to make good money, and...I have my future all planned out for me.

Anoela, how 'bout you?

Um...wow.

I want to...I love working behind the camera.

I love acting and I love singing.

People tell me I have a lot of talents.

My mom would not spend any time with me.

We were staying in the garage at my mom's friend's house, this car place, and she was down there getting high.

And she finally told me that she was.

And then she thought that, since she told me that, it'd be all right to do it right in front of me.

Her and my dad was smoking and I was in the room and I, my face started turning, like, a purple color, and they rushed me to the hospital.

They were asking my doctor what it was, and I'm allergic to drugs.

And ever since then, my mom's been telling everybody, "Stay away from 'em.

Right?

Drugs away from me," but, like, she still does 'em.

Her excuse is that she's allergic to 'em, too.

So no one will think she does 'em.

But my mom, she says she's only allergic to marijuana, but she does meth.

How do you feel about living in foster home, [unintelligible]?

I think some of them have you so they can get the money.

They feed you, but... they don't treat you like...

They don't treat you like one of their own.

They don't listen to your problems, not all of them.

And the one we were recently at was not a good one.

They treat us like we were slaves, and get not much, and, well, we didn't really get what we deserved in return.

We got what we needed, but we didn't get any love.

And that's what we really need.

And... (I left home when I was 17.

I couldnt stand to stay and hear him scream.)

I'm Reanna Ogden.

How do you imagine yourself, like, in ten years?

I'm in California, um, being a physical therapist for the little burnt kids--I don't know what that'd be called--but for them.

And then, um, adopting.

Why do people bring in kids in the world if they can't take care of them?

It doesn't make sense.

So, I just think that, um, people should help those kids because there's nobody else there to help them.

They can't help themselves.

How do you feel about, like, having to tell your story?

Sometimes, like, when I'm talking about it to people, like, I just tell them to shut up because I don't wanna talk about it.

Because then they'll think my dad's a really bad person, and he's really not.

He's a really good person.

And like, I mean, he's a really, just because what he's done is bad, but, he is a really good person.

And, I mean, every day somebody makes mistakes.

You can be a bum and people are scared of you, but, I mean, really, you're the nicest person.

But you could be a doctor and they wouldn't be scared of you, but that could be a molester.

You know?

They don't know.

They don't know.

They just judge by the looks of somebody of, you know, "Oh, he looks like somebody.

So don't talk to him."

No.

You know?

People get on the pedophile list for peeing in the street, peeing in public.

How old are you right now?

14.

When do you turn 15?

Like, next year.

I just turned 14 on the 5th of July.

My mom was doing drugs and, like, she couldn't take care of me, my little sister, when she was doing it.

And that's just like, that's like the basic story.

I took my little sister everywhere I went, like, I can never be alone.

I had to have my little sister with me because my mom told me to take her everywhere.

And I was like practically raising my sister.

And my mom was very rude.

You know how they say "Meth must make them nice?"

No, it makes them so mean.

She was always yelling at me.

She told me I was the reason that everything bad happened to her like I was to blame.

I hated it.

It sucked horribly.

So I actually told my counselor that I wanted to leave.

And so we left.

My dad has always been an alcoholic, but my mom said whenever they first got together and he was living with her and she was taking care of him in California, that was the best time.

But he's always been a drunk.

So yeah.

In my situation, it was all very organic, meaning I was there, you know, my folks weren't around.

It was just a really easy scenario to take advantage of me.

In your family, was your dad already doing stuff to your older sister?

No.

Like it was like when I was seven and it happened once.

I just don't want him to be on that list.

People looking at that list on the internet and then they get his picture.

And then, you know, I mean, he's not a bad guy, really.

I mean, I know what you're thinking.

I don't think I mean, people make mistakes every day.

And like it says in the Bible, a sin is a sin, no matter how big the sin is.

If you lie or if you kill somebody a sin is a sin, a little white lie is just as big as killing somebody.

Okay.

Since you last saw me in June.

I was moved from Barb's house in August because of a fight that we got into.

Then I moved into um, Jamie and Rob's house, which later to find out I was only placed there for an adoption placement.

And so it was really frustrating on my part because I didn't want to be adopted in the first place.

I talk to my dad still and it's not a big secret.

Tuesday I have court, so I'm going to bring up a couple of the issues up with the judge and explain to him that visits with my dad have not happened yet.

My dad knows when court is and it's open court so anybody can go and he's going to go.

And I'm supposed to cause a scene, he says, and I'm supposed to listen to him when he says to go sit back down and listen to the judge and stuff.

But just hopefully that I can prove to the judge that I do listen to my dad and they can do something about it because I want to go home.

See my little baby?

How are you?

Hello, what is your name?

Cameron.

Hi Cameron.

Nice to meet you.

I'm Tara.

Can you shake my hand?

Hi.

Yeah.

Pearl, what are their names?

This is Grayson and Cameron.

Hi.

I mean --.

I couldn't tell you how much stuff has happened in ten years.

There is so much.

I mean, crap.

Three kids later.

Well, two and a half, I guess.

A lot of s * * * * * relationships.

I graduated high school, though.

My sister still lives at home.

My little sister.

I don't know where they live.

I'm not allowed to see them.

My little sister holds a grudge because I'm the reason why the whole family got ruined.

How did you end up going from your dad's house to not being with your dad anymore?

What was happening with your dad?

They suspected abuse.

I mean, my uncles and my I mean, my aunts.

We all wrestled because we were like, my dad didn't want us to grow up to be wusses is what he called them.

And he wanted us, he wanted us to grow up and be able to handle our own.

And one visit with my counselor, I bent over to get something, and my shirt came up and I had like, like a boot mark on my back, my, like, lower, lower back.

And they asked me what was going on, and I lied to them.

And I told them that my dad hit me.

What did happen?

Going back to it, what was the actual -- My dad and my mom or my step mom had gone down south to look at a house because we were going to be moving there the following summer.

So while they were gone, my grandpa watched us and the night before they got home, my grandpa told me to do a couple of dishes that were on the counter and I forgot before I went to bed.

So my dad came home the next day and before I went to school he hit me with a car antenna and left a bruise like that on my back.

And I didn't tell on him, but when I went to school my shirt had come up and somebody had seen it and told on it.

And then they asked me what happened.

So I told them.

I didn't think it was anything bad.

I've been getting my ass beat forever.

The next day I came to school with cut off hair and I had like a red sweatpants and red t shirt or sweatshirt that I wore to school.

Now, this is in May, so I'm like sweating to death.

And so they just went ahead and took me out of the house.

The outfit was for -- it was a punishment.

I had to wear it for a week.

Then my hair, he just kind of cut it off to make it shorter because in a week I was going to my mom's and my mom had a lice problem.

And what, what it was, was to teach us a lesson.

Clothes aren't everything.

You don't need clothes to have friends.

You don't need makeup to have friends and you don't need a certain hairstyle.

You don't need anything.

And people should like you for who you are and not what you wear, what you look like.

It was pretty much life lessons that he tried teaching, but I don't know.

At the time I didn't get it.

And then when I sat down with my sister and she told me, well, that's exactly what he did to me.

And it was understandable.

And I finally got it.

But it took me a couple of years to even understand any of it.

But they told my dad that he needed to go like and cool off and we got to go home for the weekend.

And then on Sunday when he came home.

He took me out on the front porch and cut my hair off.

And he told the, he told the police officer that it was because I was going to my mom's and I have thick hair.

So he didn't want to deal with the head lice coming back from my mom's.

Why do you think he did it?

Well, he -- he told me he said this.

This will teach you to tell on me.

So he did it to be vindictive.

Turn it around.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

It's very likely.

It is.

It would make sense.

We can pull up in front of it.

[Unintelligible].

Oh, my goodness.

How awesome is that?

I like Spiderman.

I like Spiderman.

Go ahead, go first.

You can't go together.

So.

Okay, go back to like being 13 years old.

Just imagine.

Mm hmm.

And I remember we were doing the interview with you in front of the house that you were staying at foster care with Pearl.

Mm hmm.

What was that experience like?

Like you were there for not that long at that point.

Um.

Uh, probably the worst.

One of the worst experiences of my life.

Um.

Go back a little bit before that.

Like, uh, I mean, like I said, I loved my life before foster care.

You would think -- looking back on it, I wouldn't have.

But, like, yeah, we had no power or no electricity for a long time, you know?

People at school didn't know that, you know?

And I was raising my little sister.

My mom didn't care about me because I was kind of the reason our family was destroyed in a sense, over my dad and stuff that had happened between him and I or whatever.

And I kind of got him in trouble for it.

So my mom didn't really care for me, so she didn't take me to, like, shower or nothing.

And, but I still loved life.

You know, there's all these random people, it's called like a trap house, I guess, but like, real hardcore, like, these people didn't come from America necessarily.

Like, they came from all over.

They would stay at our house and like, you know, like kind of like, I guess dads or big brothers, you know?

And then like I had sat on a bloody needle, you know, and no electricity, no water, after this prostitute like had left my bathroom.

And I remember like even at the age of 12 or 11, one of the two, I knew the difference of like my little sister can't be here when I go to school, you know.

So then I had made the choice to speak up to my counselor and, you know, actually say something.

And we were taken, which I almost feel like was the worst mistake of my life.

My little sister is completely ruined from those days.

She's back with my mom.

But she, she's not the same because in foster care, they don't care about you in any way.

And you're like, your whole life's destroyed.

I had to, like, watch my little sister, she was three years old.

She's beautiful.

It's actually really sad.

She went from being like this amazing three year old little girl to like one of our foster sisters, who was also a little girl, had made her do sexual things with her, you know, and there was nothing I mean, there's nothing I could do to, to change that because they would have separated us, you know.

And so, like, I had to just kind of like -- so was -- she -- like her memory today is, thinks like nobody tried to help her, but I did.

There's nothing I could do at all.

Our foster parents, the ones where Pearl was at, like if she didn't eat fast enough or something, like, and she was like, throw it up or something.

Like, they'd make her eat her throw up.

You know, constantly telling her she was lying, you know?

Like they really messed her head up to where, like, this little girl is not okay at all.

So I'd say it was the worst thing that could have ever really happened to us.

I wish it upon no child at all, ever.

Hey.

Hi.

How are you?

Good.

How are you?

Im dropping stuff.

I love your hair.

Thank you.

Oh, my goodness.

Look at your hair.

Oh my goodness, it's so beautiful.

When we were talking to Anoela, I just got the sense that she's had a lot of deep concern for you, and it just got me worried and worried for your well-being.

She doesn't see how I am on a daily basis, I guess.

Um.

We don't talk that often.

She got adopted.

I didn't.

She grew up differently than I did.

So tell me a little bit about you.

What's your name and, and how did you guys meet?

My name is Chris and -- My mom was going to name me Pandora.

Really?

Yeah.

You know, the plane?

The Enola Gay?

Yes of course.

She had never even heard of it.

I was born so early, they told her that I was going to have mental disabilities and I would never get very far.

She said that she had a dream and in her dream somebody told her, Anoela is going to be all right and you're going to be all right.

And that's where she got my name.

Oh, my gosh.

After visiting Larissa, I told you, I was still trying to process it all.

I hate putting it like this, but she ruined every placement we went to.

She was one of those kids that thought if she acted out enough, she would get to go home to her family.

So nobody wanted to adopt her, but they wouldn't split us up.

And when they finally did, split us up.

I know it was hard for her.

But that was after so long of her making it difficult for me.

I couldn't find my forever home or somewhere I belonged.

Because if she made the wrong move, we were both gone.

How come you ended up going to foster care to begin with anyways?

Was your grandfather sick or... Well me and my sister were with my dad, and my sister was at my grandma and grandpa's at the time.

Well, I got really sick and my dad took me to the doctor, I had a doctor's appointment.

Well, he told me he was going to go out and smoke a cigarette.

Well, you know, there we were waiting in the waiting room, so I said, okay.

Well, the doctor called me back and I got back when my heart stopped six times.

And my dad never came back.

He left me at the hospital.

So I became a ward of the state.

The doctor took me straight into his care and did surgery and when I got out of the hospital, I went straight to foster care.

I think the truth of of everything that we had gone through just came out in that moment.

It maybe it was out of fear of getting in trouble for not talking.

Maybe it was out of being mad at our dad for leaving.

Whatever it was, it was -- that was the moment that everything changed.

Like my dad still owns the body shop so he will like if I need my car fixed or something, like I'll see him then, but I don't really get a hold of him.

It's just not worth my time anymore.

Yeah.

I mean, I still fight with depression, but I mean, I think that I'm learning to control it better.

I mean, not for real.

I mean, I cry all the time.

It doesn't help that I'm pregnant.

So I haven't told a lot of people, but like because it was so hard to get help for just the depression that I started self-medicating myself because my boyfriend was a drug addict.

And so back in January, back in January, I started shooting dope.

It was scary, but I felt fine.

I had energy.

I could deal with my kids.

It was tough.

And then I decided that I was going to quit.

And because everything was going downhill, I lost my job.

It was just real tough.

And the weekend that I quit.

Me and Jake both had decided to stop, and all it was was a fight between us.

And in April, I spent a week in the hospital because I tried to kill myself.

Pearl, I didn't f * * * * * * know that.

I didn't know that.

I'm so sorry.

I didn't know that.

It's been a tough year.

This place is amazing.

I mean, it's really gorgeous.

It's really pretty.

Just really, really.

Yeah.

Really lush.

Hi!

Hi!

Hi!

Forever and a day.

Forever and ever.

It's been forever.

Ten years.

Wow.

Crazy, right?

You think there's anything that could ever prepare you for that journey from there to there?

A lot has changed.

Went from home to home.

I've been adopted for a second time.

I had three kids.

It's crazy.

I've been with the kids' dad for seven years, so that's pretty much like the whole time.

I was with him.

Where is he at now?

He's actually in jail right now.

What did he do?

He was abusive.

To the kids or -- To me.

What do you think you hate the most about what's going on?

Not having my kids.

It got to the point where we were living out of my car and I couldn't do that with the kids because I couldn't get them taken away.

So we put them with their dad's ex-wife.

She's taking care of them right now until I can get on my feet and get a place.

What are your main ways of coping with all of that stress?

I normally just keep it in.

Is there a way out of it?

Not really.

It's like when I see you, I just see this -- I always have -- like I see this incredibly gorgeous, beautiful, amazing woman that's fierce.

And you're -- and you protect yourself.

And you protect your heart, you know?

What are you working towards?

Hopefully a place of my own.

My kids.

I want to be a nurse, but I didn't finish school, so I got to finish school first.

Does it seem insurmountable?

Seems like too much.

Why?

I don't know.

What were you hoping today would be like?

Like me coming by.

What were you hoping would happen?

I don't know.

I was just looking forward to it.

I'm so happy to see you.

It's good to see you again too.

That was hard.

Wait, how did your sister go in a coma.

She hung herself in January.

It takes, like, 12 minutes for a human to hang and die.

She hung for seven of those 12 minutes.

Yeah.

That's terrible.

And um --.

Did somebody find her?

Yeah.

Did you find her?

No.

And I didn't go see her in the hospital.

I wouldn't.

How come?

Um, that being the little girl that I you know, I raised.

You know, I couldn't do that.

I couldn't see her that way.

Not at all.

I, I totally, I forgive my father 100%.

And I speak to him.

And I honestly would love more than anything for him to be taken off the list.

And I'm serious.

I don't think it's okay what had happened, but I understand it.

Like, I lived with my dad for ten years before I even remembered what had happened, you know?

And obviously, I mean, everything was okay, I guess, you know, um, he doesn't really remember in his head that he had done it, like, seriously does not, and it kills him.

And he lived a really crazy life growing up at the age of nine, he was kicked out on the streets by a mom who used to beat him.

You know, and never knew his dad, and was being raped by grown men, you know, and has been drinking every single day of his life since.

He's literally not there, like to believe that he did it.

You know, I get it, because if we were born into their lifestyle and thought just the way they thought and felt the way they felt about the situation that they were going through and thought, you know, actually what was going on in their head was, you know what I mean, to them, I would probably act the same way, but I'm not.

I'm me, that's the difference.

Do you think there's a way to break the cycle like, oh.

Yeah.

People who care being actually like get involved.

Don't just sit there and be like, oh, you know, watch it on TV like this.

Dogs need -- those dogs -- we need to pay money to them.

Actually go adopt them, you know what I mean?

I just actually referred to us kids as dogs, to a sense.

I did.

But I mean, you know what I mean?

Actually go in and do something about it don't just sit back and just shake your head about it.

You know what's that going to do?

Nothing at all.

You have to actually care.

You know.

When you're raised like that, you're either going to go in the same exact direction or you're going to be completely opposite and there's no in-between.

My sister and I are prime examples.

I looked at all those people I loved that have ruined their life and a part of mine because of the decisions they were making.

And I just I knew that there had to be better ways out.

And it takes -- it takes a lot of strength to say no to to doing this drug or that drug when you feel like you have nothing.

It takes a lot of strength to say, no, I'm going to get back up on my feet and I'm going to, I'm going to make this better for myself.

And it's difficult, but in the end, it's a lot more worth it.

Yeah.

I've had a pretty s * * * * * life.

I don't think I would go back and change anything.

I really don't, because going through everything that I've gone through has made me a better parent.

And it showed me what I don't want for my kids, and it's made me the person that I am today.

I don't think that I would be anywhere as emotionally strong as I am had I not gone through it.

I am extremely thankful for for all the things I had to go through.

I'm thankful that I went to foster care and experienced all the the negative and the positive things I went through there because like I said, if I stayed on that path, who knows where I'd be now?

And I think everything that happens to you forms you into the person you are right now.

And that formed me into a person that I always, I always wanted to be.

And I may not have my, my entire life figured out, but I could be doing much worse.

Where's your dad now?

Was it disappointing to see him that time?

I don't know, because I've seen him so many times.

It's almost like he acts like nothing happened.

And that's how he wants to be.

Like he chooses to, like you said, not live in the past.

And I guess that was kind of tough for me because he -- it was his fault like he was the reason why we were where we are, not mine.

It was his.

It took me a lot to get to that point, but.

Mm hmm.

Yeah, he was the adult.

You were the kid.

I didn't know any better.

I mean, I did kind of, but I should have just did the dishes.

Let's watch the rest of this.

That's weird, right?

It's amazing.

They suspected abuse and my counselor and everybody kept telling me that my dad's going to [Unintelligible] and my dad.

And when I talked to him he said that he didn't do that.

And I still believe to this day that he didn't do it.

I mean, if he did, I don't want to believe it.

(I wouldn't say I'm prepared for this).

On the next episode of Girl Unscripted.

It's like, so easy to be mean.

And you get accepted when you're mean.

People think it's cool when you're mean.

I'm not allowed to hang out with her.

My dad won't let me.

What did he's say?

He said that she's a bad influence.

You little bitch, you keep on doing s * * * I'm gonna slap you across your f * * * * * * face.

You think I'm f * * * * * * playing with you?

Come on Jenny.

Come outside the room.

Come outside the room.

(It's time to go.

It's time to go.

We loved and we let go, and now its time.

Its time to go.

Its time to go.

We loved and we let go and now, its time.)