Support comes from D.O.

McComb and Sons serving Fort Wayne families since 1925, with funeral, cremation and pre-planning services providing guidance through times of remembrance.

More information at DignityMemorial.com hi thanks so much for watching LIFE Ahead here on PBS for Wayne of course this program provides vital information for adults of all ages and you'll want to stick around for this topic.

It's funeral preplanning.

It's so important and a lot of times people wait until the last minute or sometimes don't even do it at all which of course puts the burden on the family or the survivors.

So let's talk about that and I have a very special guest tonight and I'll introduce him in just a moment.

But I want to let you know that we do intercept your questions throughout the entire program.

We have several ways of doing that.

You can give us a phone call and the number is on your screen for that and just ask your question live on the air.

We love interacting with you if you are too busy not to stay on hold for just a short time, you can let us know what your question is and we'll transcribe that for our guests or you can Texas with your question and when you do that with that other number on the screen where says text you can simply just tell us your name and where you're from and we like to say hello to you and we want to say hello to our guests tonight Phil Michael.

>> Hi, Mark.

Great to have you back again.

We had John I don't know in about a month or two ago and we talked about it that time funeral traditions, how they've changed in various options you have today to honor and celebrate someone's life today we're talking about the preplanning process and I think it will have a very interesting conversation over this.

So thank you again for being with us.

Let's go ahead and just start right out of the chute.

>> What is the importance of preplanning a funeral?

Well, it's it's protection for our families and those we love the most.

>> You know, as we go through life we we protect our family with insurance and different things for things that might happen.

So it really makes sense to put protection in place for something that unfortunately we know is going to happen.

>> Yes.

And it takes that burden off of the sole survivors as I mentioned earlier and we'll talk a little bit more about that during the show and what are some of the misconceptions about people that might have about funeral preplanning?

>> I think a lot of the misconceptions right now revolve around cremation.

People don't realize all of the options that are still available when you choose cremation you can do a traditional visitation and viewings just like a regular funeral with cremation to follow you can do a celebration of life still at church in the funeral home or even an outside location.

You know, if you can dream up we can we can do it and then also with that and cremation too is the possibilities for permanent placement.

>> Sure.

And we have a picture to show that we have one of a cemetery, a local cemetery, a beautiful one at that and right around the pond there.

Phil, what is that?

>> I see some others cremation cremation niches.

Right.

So a lot of cemeteries are now offering options that can be still in ground burials options that are above ground where ashes can be placed.

We also are seeing what are called glass front Nicias oh we have another picture to show you on that.

Yeah.

Oh that's beautiful.

Yeah.

A lot of cemeteries are offering those for families it allows you to display an urn with photos and things like that just a lot of great options and you can preplan these things just like the funeral.

So it's a great option.

So you're not just bringing ashes home and I can see the various sizes there, some of the smaller ones, the larger ones and I've actually been in some of the chapels in town and some of the displays that they've actually designed.

>> I don't know if it was the the deceased that actually did that.

Probably a little bit of both are the families who purchased those niches for our nieces, for the deceased, the loved one.

But I love the fact that there's a variety of space that you can purchase.

>> You can do the smaller one or the companion placement and you're true to of course I have a lot of stuff so I would want a large one.

>> So I'm have to reserve one of those.

>> So that seems to be a popular thing nowadays with the Crimean or the cremation issues.

So I think I'm glad that they've rolled those out.

So what stage in your life or maybe even what age should you even start considering preplanning your funeral?

>> What's a good time?

You know, I've seen people as young is in their 20s doing it but most commonly it's in that 60s as you're kind of moving towards retirement, seeing a change in what you're going to be doing work wise and what you life has in front of you.

And so that's the most common age.

But you know, once you have family and kids and things like that, it's always time to start thinking about all these things again.

>> It's protection for those loved ones so right.

And it's so important to make these decisions before a family crisis, don't you think?

Absolutely.

And and some of those reasons are why um well you just you never know if you don't have these discussions and share your plans with the family.

Sometimes there's questions they never get answered.

>> You know, you get faced with a crisis and now you don't know if you did what mom or dad wanted or you know, there's always that question there that just lingers over you.

>> And I can tell you from personal experience when my father passed away at a very early age we were shocked.

We all the family was in such shock.

We and this is the first time we ever had to deal with something like that and he left no wishes.

I will tell you that they he and his wife my step mom purchased burial space and a family plot but that's all we had.

So it was up to my brother and I basically to go around picking up the casket in the vault and we're thinking, gosh, you know what was dad's favorite color?

It was blue.

Okay, let's go with blue, you know, so I think we did a good job and my my step mom of course was thrilled to have us to help because she was really had no idea on how to plan for this funeral.

And besides that, she just lost a husband that she had for over thirty years.

So it's it's very important I will testify to that and make that testimonial that you should at least talk about it and say this is what I'd like to have and that way you'd feel more comforted and as a result my stepmother passed away as a matter of fact a couple of years ago it'd be November two years and because of what we went through with my father and trying to figure out what he wanted, she preplanned because she did not want us to go through all that again.

>> So it's probably a lot easier and that was a wonderful gift to us.

And when that time came you know, we were still grieving over her death but it here it is this is exactly what she wants and that's exactly what she got.

>> So we felt very comfortable with that.

Who's qualified to help you with pre planning a funeral?

>> So most pre planners are licensed and trained and when you say licensed, what kind of a license it's an insurance life insurance.

>> Why do you need life insurance license in order to sell funeral preplanning so predominantly the the money's that are put aside for that are held and a life insurance policy and that's to protect the consumer so that money is there can be moved things like that know it's for their protection that they have the control over that and that is because and we might as well just kind of slide into if you don't have the money and I think this is very important to talk about don't have the money to put down for the entire amount for pre planning a funeral.

There are payment plans.

Absolutely.

And that's why the insurance policy is there and so forth.

Well, that makes sense and so that money is kept by the insurance company until the time of need.

>> How does that work?

So yes, it's held in the policy.

It cannot be touched by the family or the funeral home.

It's held irrevocably for the for the family to use that time of need.

And if they're doing you know, that's another big advantage of preplanning.

Like you said, you don't have to come up with that sum all at once.

You know, when you reach that at need time, you know, payments do at that time of arrangements when you pre plan you can still pay it all at once but you can also make payments and have different, you know, things to fit that into your budget and make it work if you're able to pay some of it now and then finance the rest.

>> Can you do that?

Yes.

OK, good good.

Well it sounds fairly simple, you know so there are some other benefits I'm sure with preplanning I'm thinking financial because of the rate of inflation.

Now once you make your arrangements, are those prices pretty much solid until the time of need?

>> Yes.

Yeah, When you sign that contract you're you're locking in that price.

>> That's that's a great advantage.

So even if for instance a casket was X amount of dollars and then at the time of your death twenty years later that casket price probably went up several hundred dollars.

>> You're paying the old price, correct?

That is a great advantage for and glad that the industry looks out for people and in that respect what are some other things that you think are important that you should consider to include in your funeral arrangements?

>> Yeah, well recording them you know, make sure not only are you planning on paying for it, getting it secured but sharing it you know, making sure you've you've written it down into a book a plan and guide most funeral homes offer complimentary planning guides for the families so you can record all the wishes er keep it someplace safe you know and make sure your family knows you've made these plans and where they put them.

>> Oh that's very important.

Make sure they know where to go to get those.

>> I want to talk about something to them and first of all before I ask the next question I just want to remind our viewers in case you just tuned in, we're talking to Phil Michael who is a general manager of several funeral homes in the Fort Wayne area and we're discussing funeral planning the options and advantages of that and while we're waiting for this text to come in from Tom from Columbia City and we'll ask that in just a second we're going to go ahead and roll into the next feature because you know, sometimes LIFE Ahead.

We talk about financial planning, retirement and so forth.

>> How do you funeral plans fit into that broader estate plan?

>> It's just another aspect of your planning for your retirement, how these things are going to carry out, you know, with different things and obviously financial planners and attorneys are well versed and in how to incorporate these things with Medicaid concerns and and things like that.

So you know, planning your funeral which is protected from Medicaid and things like that is just it fits right into those plans and we've had several financial advisers on LIFE Ahead before and they typically do bring up hey, while you're at planning your retirement and setting up your your will and so forth, why don't you just go and start making your plans for your your funeral?

>> So I think that's a great idea.

We have techs coming in from time of Columbia City and he is asking that what happens if I move out of state?

>> Can I switch to a different funeral home later on?

Absolutely.

Well, let's preface that by when you make your funeral plans, when you preplan you sometimes have to attach that or all the time to a specific funeral.

Correct.

OK, so when you do that it doesn't mean you have to keep with that same funeral home.

>> But if you do move is as Tom has mentioned, can you explain that process?

So again that's we're having it in the insurance policy helps that.

So there's some funeral homes that are part of networks that allow you just to transfer it within their network and there's never additional costs or anything like that.

It's a great benefit.

But most funeral homes if there's a paid in full preplan it can be accepted at another funeral home.

They just have to agree to accept as written and OK.

>> And I want to dovetail on something that we talked about earlier.

>> We're talking about the people who actually can write up your preplanning and who are the the licensed agents and so forth.

>> But these people actually work in a funeral home.

I think some of them there's a title called a family service counselor.

They are professed in helping people preplan their funerals and some funeral directors that I've known or come across can actually do it too, can't they?

>> Correct.

Yeah, a funeral director can have a license just as well.

Yeah.

And I think most of them do and I think that's a good advantage for them.

There's a thing called thrown out there.

It's GPL a general price list.

What is that and of course I it's a price list but what's the importance or the significance of that?

>> So the FCC requires all funeral homes to have a public pricing that's available upon asking so there's no hidden cost or things like that that most funeral homes now are putting them online as well.

But it's just it's a very important for the consumer to know what's there so there's no bait and switch or things like that.

Everything's very transparent.

Well, I've seen it where when because I've been involved in some funeral planning and I thought it was great when we sat down with the funeral director of the Family Services Council to say OK, before we get started, this is our general pricing list.

So they present that right off the top.

Absolutely.

And I think that's a very professional thing and if they don't you need to ask for it I would imagine or just make sure that they have one available.

Yes, OK, everyone should have one available.

>> Very good.

Let's talk about talked about assigning a particular funeral home has to have some sort of a base and you know everybody has a funeral home families their particular family has used it time after time after time and so you need to have that in your mind before you do your funeral preplanning is what funeral home you like to have handle your arrangements, is that correct?

>> Typically, yes.

OK, but it's not a big deal if you happen to move out of state as we discussed before and and to choose another funeral home and have those transferred your plans can't move easy peasy now are you able to pay for your funeral home needs and your cemetery needs for instance under one contract or is that a separate thing?

>> How does that work so typically it would be two contracts separate cemetery contract and a funeral contract .

The cemetery contracts are not held in insurance policies.

The biggest difference there but a lot of times they can be handled at the same time when you meet with preplanning advisor or family service counselor they can put together your cemetery and funeral plans all at one shot and get it all taken care of at one time.

>> So if you were to go into a funeral home and you're going to do some funeral preplan, how do you know, for instance what casket to select or to select an urn or maybe on the cemetery side of things?

What your memorial marker or headstone would look like?

>> How are you showing these options for these things?

>> So a lot of that has become digital now.

So you can show hundreds of items as opposed to just a selection room where you may have, you know, a limited because of space number of caskets and things like that .

Now with modern technology and computer programs you can show hundreds of urns and caskets and memorial you know the markers everything is a great way to to cover an immense amount of material in a shorter amount of times.

>> And the funeral homes of course I've been in recently they don't have the display rooms anymore and a lot of those rooms have been basically converted to maybe catering or bank banquet rooms and done a nice job with those.

>> So that just you don't have to have all that inventory in that one room and you can't possibly show everything that you offer in a room.

>> Right.

So that makes sense.

So that that would be a part of the presentation when you go and you're sitting down with the family service counselor or a funeral director and they would take you through all of that and those options another avenue and the funeral industry I don't want to call it an industry but the funeral business is that there's various merchandise that you can buy in Memorial of your loved one.

>> Can you explain what some of those things are so yeah, there's everything from keepsakes, you know, with cremations, with you can do a larger erm and you can do several smaller pieces as well keepsakes there's cremation jewelry and remembrance jewelry with Thumper's things like that just a lot of options to create a special keepsake and memory for for your family and I saw a display recently where you can have your cremains or your ashes compressed into a diamond .

Absolutely that is amazing.

And when did that come about is that's something fairly new I think it's fairly new in the funeral homes.

>> You know, I think it's been around a little bit but it's becoming a more common thing and something families are asking about.

They hear about it and you want to know if they can do that or they're at least fascinated by the process and and the options because it's a it's a certified diamond when that happens.

>> Yeah, it's it's grown it takes a while and it's really a neat process and you can have that diamond of course.

>> But to spend it or maybe even set into a ring.

Absolutely.

Yeah, I think that's a great idea.

So that's something I would probably check into.

So when it's time feel to and I'm talking as an adult child when it's time to go especially for this conversation we've had it's like oh my gosh, what if my parents pass away?

I mean this is I've got to do a lot of work.

I mean you you have to meet with your funeral director.

You have to meet if there's anything regarding the cemetery like burial or cremated cremation, Nicias, you have to be able to know what direction you're going in and you know, for heaven's sakes, if somebody wanted to be cremated and you end up putting them into a casket into a vault at ground burial and you find out later no, he wanted to be cremated, that could be fairly devastating.

So the discussion with your loved ones is very, very important.

But the question is when when do you bring that up and how do you bring that up?

>> And that's it can be difficult.

It's not a fun conversation but I think it's always easier when you're not faced with a bad diagnosis from a doctor or something like that when you just have some private time with your mom, dad , brother or sister or anything like that that you can just have an open and honest discussion and you know, it's like any major event we we plan for in life weddings, retirements, all of those things just having that discussion about thinking about planning and what their plan is.

And like you said, even if you don't pay for a funeral ahead of time getting an idea of what they want so you can carry out those wishes, it's huge.

>> Yes, I bet it would be and it's a definite sit down conversation and it'd be very serious and I would probably recommend taking some notes at the same time when absolutely.

Am I forgetting anything about preplanning that we haven't talked about so far is there anything that you want to emphasize other than the earlier the better I guess you know as far as the inflation part of it and keeping those prices the same why am I missing anything there at all?

>> Phil, there's something that should be said.

>> Um, I think just knowing that you you don't have to do it all at once like we talked about you can do it at once but you know you can do symmetry at one time, your funeral at another time and you start on these early enough you can do payments and not have it be one huge expense at one time just kind of depending on where you are in life and things like that and even just starting with writing down your wishes.

You know, like I said, most funeral homes have planning guides that they offer, you know, free of charge and you can start recording your wishes and having those conversations with with your family and that sort of thing.

>> Well, we have got a couple of minutes left and I want to save a little time here on the show to to break down the two different types that we've talked about.

We've talked about the traditional burial, a traditional funeral and then versus the the cremation and the nieces and so forth.

>> So when it comes to a traditional burial and a traditional funeral, let's just put it that way a traditional funeral at the funeral home we're talking about a visitation involved.

We're talking about the the actual service day of the funeral.

And I remember when I was a kid there used to be two nights of visitation and then the third day was a short visitation and then the funeral.

But things have changed and I don't know if that's for the better or not at least for me and my time and my schedule.

But so when it comes to a traditional funeral with a body being viewed, it's necessary for that body to be embalmed because of its public transportation.

>> It's visitation.

So you have a body in a casket, the caskets going to the cemetery.

What all is involved at the cemetery?

What do they need to make sure that they keep in mind to purchase when they do their preplanning with the cemetery making sure that you have the opening and closing taken care of also the vault that's required at most cemeteries and then there's a set and seal of the vault that's required.

So sometimes it's a third party, sometimes it's the cemetery itself that takes care of all that.

>> But those are all expenses that revolve around the cemetery and then on the cremation side you can still have a body viewed and have them in a temporary casket.

Is that correct?

Yes.

>> OK, and then the cremation doesn't even have to be a temporary cast.

No, no.

True.

That's true.

Yeah, I forgot about that but and then after that to the crematory we go and then of course the ashes are put into a an urn that is usually purchased by the family or the person who planned a funeral.

Correct.

So yeah so just some pieces some steps to go through and like we said and now with that you know the cemetery are adapting.

Yeah.

With that and offering these new spaces and options for families to have a place that they can still come and visit even though the family took the cremation out over traditional burial.

You know we can talk about this for probably another hour or so and we appreciate you being here tonight and I'm sure we'll see you again.

Thank you, Mark.

Absolutely.

And thank you so much for watching.

Until next time we hope you have a great LIFE Ahead Support comes from D.O.

McComb and Sons serving Fort Wayne families since 1925, with funeral, cremation and pre-planning services providing guidance through times of remembrance.

More information at DignityMemorial.com