From six news.

This is connections I'm Raquel Steven.

Back to school season is a mix of excitement and anxiety for families, new routines, new teachers, and the pressure of getting kids settled into the classroom.

But for parents of children with disabilities, that transition brings an extra layer of challenges.

They may face challenges with securing appropriate accommodations, navigating IEPs and 504 plans, coordinating transportation or ensuring their child has the right support in the classroom.

There's also the emotional side making sure their child feels included, safe and understood in a new environment.

For many parents, it means juggling advocacy, paperwork and all paperwork underscore paperwork and preparation on top of the typical pressures of the back to school season.

And as a parent to a child with disabilities myself, it's a process.

I am also constantly navigating.

But today, I want to learn from our guest about what other families face during back to school season, and what resources are out there for folks who need support.

Our guest in studio, I have Brant Tasia Johnson, a parent of a child with disabilities.

I also have Kristen Lopez, communications manager at Star Bridge and also a parent of a child with disabilities, and joining us remotely from Central New York.

I have Cara Georgie, a family education specialist specialist at Star Bridge, and joining me a little later would be Shana Elzey.

She's also a parent with a child with a disability.

And like always, we welcome our listeners to join in on the conversation.

Call us at 1844295 talk.

That's 1-844-295-8255.

Or at (585) 263-9994 or email us at connections@wxxi.org.

Or you can comment right in our YouTube channel.

Now let's start this conversation.

Brant Asia.

Kristin, I'm going to start with you.

What does back to school season look like in your household?

Kristin.

Back to school season, sometimes comes with uncertainty and some uncertainty, but also hope at the same time as well.

So, you know, new schedules, new routines, sometimes new building, new transportation, all the things that you've worked on, whether it's from the previous year or sometimes even summer school, that's all changed.

And for some, some children, like my own in my household, you know, school, summer school services.

And today and then school starts in a week and a half.

So that's even, you know, new faces, new schedules, new routines.

But it's also hopeful to aspect because you hope that the people that are taking care of your child have, read their accommodations and are prepared and that they're welcoming and that there's an aspect.

But, the first couple weeks, they're tough.

They are really tough with those new schedules.

And as we know, that support is not just limited to school either.

It's, you know, what happens after school, you know, is is the child going to be is my son going to be accepted?

Is he going to sit alone at lunch?

You know, hopefully I've done my best to build a community so that when he goes in school, people know who he is.

And if he is having a hard time, they understand.

Oh, that's that's just him having a tough day right now.

And it's just a tough moment.

It doesn't mean it's going to be tough forever.

So a lot of prep you know we start it tomorrow.

Yeah.

You know going to visit the school a couple times before we go in.

Meeting with the teachers, giving the teacher a preparation of what my child likes, what they don't like, what's the best way to communicate with them?

Really, it takes a team effort.

Yeah.

So can we.

Can we can you tell us about your.

Your is your son?

Yep.

Yeah.

Can you tell us about you?

Sure.

Antonio is 12 years old.

He's on the autism spectrum.

He is in middle school, and, he's about 11 level to autism.

If we speak of of levels here.

He does have some communication, but it's it's not conversational.

And change is hard for him.

Change is really hard for him.

He is 12, but, even though he's only going into seventh grade, he's he's been at five different buildings.

That's another tough thing too, is special education is not always guaranteed that it's going to be in the same building, depending on how many kids you know are coming up into the grade level, depending on teacher and staffing levels, and depending on the needs of each child.

So, he is he, you know, he loves trains, he loves music, he loves to be around people.

But, socially, it's tough because the things that he's into and the things that he likes to do are not where normal teenage boys, are.

So it's hard to blend in, you know?

But there's always I would say there's there's there's hope.

He has who he is.

And, he's happy.

And, we really try with his team to make those accommodations and to bring out the best of him while he's in school for six hours a day.

Yeah.

And he's is not supposed to blend in.

No, I know, and that's what I say.

You know why, why, why, why then, when you were born to stand out?

Yes.

And Brant.

Asia.

Bri.

I'll call you Bri.

Bri, tell us about your son.

And what does back to school look like for you?

Well, back to school, I'm going to agree with some of the stuff that Christine is saying.

This is honestly his first full year of school.

Like last year, he was in pre-K, so he didn't have a whole day of school.

It wasn't very stressful.

Communicating with people this year is is kind of giving me a hard time.

I don't know, it's kind of stressful for me, for him going back to school.

I'm not going to lie there place to him and somewhere that I don't feel very comfortable with him being.

So they're giving me a lot of runaround and a lot of back and forth with somebody said, there's somebody say this.

He say she say so.

It's kind of stressful right now.

Kyrie though he is he's four.

He's going to be five next month.

And I don't know Kyrie is Kyrie.

He's he's a cool cool kid.

He he I don't know.

He he knows how to do everything.

He loves everything.

He's not diagnosed yet.

So you know I we know he's autistic but he he's not diagnosed yet.

But he does go on the 29th to get diagnosed.

So hopefully with that we get more, you know, programs and stuff and all the help that he needs and stuff like that.

So.

Yeah.

And what what I know you said you plan like a week in advance, right?

You go visit the school a week in advance.

Christian.

What other preparations do you find yourself making that maybe other parents don't have to think about?

You know, I, I one of the things that I put together as an all about me sheet, so it has like Antonio com Tony Tony's picture on there with things that he likes, things that he doesn't like.

Preferred language, ways that he gets motivated.

And regardless if I can, because sometimes you can't be with the team beforehand.

Right.

Like, teachers are like I start on September 3rd and this is when you get to meet me.

But if they have an email list, I can give it to them up front so they have some information about my child.

You know, even if it's just me getting in the car and driving to the school to to let them know, like this is what it is, or waking up like I always tell people, regardless if your child has a disability or not, like get them on a sleep schedule of what it is going to look like before school starts.

Because we all know getting on the bus that morning, like we have high hopes that they're getting on the bus, and sometimes the bus does not go, you know, and even like packing the lunch a week before, like I literally will take out his lunchbox and like, put the lunch in there and have him do the things that he needs to do independently.

Put your shoes on, put your coat on.

So that some of those basic skills that we take for granted that seem normal to us, it's it's it's getting them prepared for that.

Also playdates.

Right?

So school is not just about academics.

It's that social aspect too.

So if you know somebody that's in your child's classroom, connect with them beforehand so that they have somebody that, you know, can kind of pair with them from peer to peer, that's really important too.

So those are some of the things that like, I'm, I'm really starting to do right now is just get them back on schedule, reaching out to peers.

I took them back to school shopping last night so they can see, you know, what things are.

But it gets tougher as it gets older.

Middle school has its own set of challenges.

And, you know, as you said, your son starting off school this year and you kind of feel like you're losing control.

I feel like as you get older, it feels like you're losing more and more control to really?

Yeah.

Because you just you have more people in the building, more teachers to deal with versus just being in the same classroom, different administration.

You know, you're going from elementary school, that might just be a K through three or K through five, and now you've got, you know, 607th graders in a big building.

It's a lot.

So there's just more obstacles.

You mean bringing him in noisy places, right?

Yes.

That's another thing I do.

I'm like, I bring them in Wegmans, where it's echoey and he can hear what it sounds like to get used to that again.

Yeah.

So, and Brie, I know you you you work in a child care environment, right?

Does that help you at all?

Navigate or is it or are you seeing is I helping like underscore the difficulties that you're facing?

I think like for Kyrie.

Yes.

I think is I think working in the child care education I think is helpful to him because he's around kids all day.

So like you said, he's around noise, noisy.

I think it's I think it's helpful.

He, he Kyrie I don't I'm sorry I'm a little nervous but it's okay Kyrie I don't know.

He's he's literally just like the coolest kid.

Like I don't know how to like really explain him because I'm a little nervous right now.

But I think working in a child care education is helpful to him because again, he's around other kids and he can he can do everything that the other kids do.

Sometimes he doesn't like noise, sometimes he rather be by himself and away from other people.

And that's that's totally fine.

Everybody gets it.

The kids get it.

They let him be.

When they know when he comes in, he wants to play or if he wants them to back up, you know, they're understanding.

Everybody's understanding.

He's he's understanding.

So I think is pretty cool.

I like it and I like working.

I like my kids being in my work environment.

Yes.

So so as far as getting him placed in school for for kindergarten, what are what are some of the challenges you you wrote?

He rolls your eyes.

What are what what are some of the challenges that you're facing?

Because I'm pretty sure some listeners can can share, share the same experiences.

Okay.

So me I thought him him being placed at his pre-K school, I thought him going to kindergarten, he was automatically going to stay placed where he was at.

But that's that.

That's not the case at all.

So I, I've got a letter in the mail.

I've been waiting for a letter in the mail to see if he was back in his school.

I finally did get the letter and it was placed at a different school.

I have a little cousin that's autistic as well.

They go to the same school during different grades, but they go to the same school.

And his mom was basically telling me that, if Kyrie was moved or placed somewhere that they were supposed to acknowledge me, you know, and let me know these things.

Yeah.

Because he has IEP and stuff like that.

So when I got the letter, I automatically start calling Rochester City School District because I want to get him placed back to where he was at in pre-K.

So in the beginning, I got nothing.

No, no answers from Rochester School District.

Nothing.

No answers.

I finally reached somebody.

It was a lady.

And she basically was telling me that the school that he was at before was, turning into a bilingual school, which I didn't know.

There a bilingual school.

I know this already and that they're not taking nonverbal kids anymore.

So that caught me by surprise a little bit.

I'm like, okay, well, see, okay, I'm gonna keep trying.

So, I kept calling after that.

Kept calling.

No answer.

Then I finally got an answer again by somebody, and he basically told me that there's nothing I can do.

Nothing at all.

He was, like, really nasty about it.

Like rude a little bit.

And, I was with my son's grandmother, and, you know, she was basically telling him, like, you know, I work in the, education field too, you know, with kids and stuff as well.

And, my colleagues basically were telling me, you know, that they don't recommend that school that he's placed at.

And, you know, us as parent and grandparent, we don't really feel comfortable with him being there either.

And that was like the wrong thing to say, because once he said that, he was like, oh, well, your colleagues don't need to work with kids and stuff like that and there's nothing you can do.

He was placed there based off his IEP, which is understandable, I get that, I understand that, but that didn't stop me.

I, I I'm I'm still trying.

I've been to to the new school.

Really the new school is honestly more helpful than the school district.

They're helping me more than the school district is helping me.

They the Rochester School District people told me to do a voluntary transfer, knowing that you can't do a voluntary transfer until May.

That's when you can do it again.

It's it's closed now.

Closed June 30th.

So I went down to the school and they were telling me, like, I don't know why they sent you here.

There's you can't do that until May.

Yesterday I also had the border of special education lady call me, and she basically told me the same thing.

There's nothing I could do.

Even though I told her I don't feel comfortable.

You know, I feel more comfortable with my son being where he was at previously because, you know, he knows there.

And like you said, it's hard.

It's hard for transition.

Yes.

So, you know, so it's not really good.

I'm not having a good time.

No.

It it's kind of hard.

So starting school off he might still be at the new school because there's nothing I can do basically is what they're telling me.

And I hate that you feel as if there's nothing you can do.

Kyra.

What?

What can she do?

What are the.

You work with families across the region.

What are the most common challenges parents bring to you this time of year?

What we've been hearing is very common, kind of these last minute big decisions being made, and families kind of getting the notice after as opposed to kind of feeling like a partner alongside it through the process.

One of the things that we do when we're working with families in a situation like this is we have several really good, tools that we would, equip the families with one to look at what the different type of placements actually mean and entail and how they do align with the IEP and support the student's unique needs.

And then we also have a list of questions that parents can consider asking as they're approaching these new environments.

Because as both, Kristen and Brie have shared, change is hard.

And it is that much harder when our children have unique needs and have built relationships and a sense of belonging in a space, and that's more than just their included.

It's they feel like they have roots there.

And that's so important for many of our students, because when we ask that question of are they ready to learn?

That sense of belonging and connection is what equips them to be able to say, yeah, I think I could give it a try.

And so one of the things we do is, encourage the families also to keep those communication lines open.

So Brie mentioned that the school so far had been helpful.

So start where those relationships are working and successful, while still using her voice and her advocacy to say, hey, in the future, if we're going to do something big like this, like, let's make a plan and a an agreement as a team of how we're going to approach this so that it does feel like a team and it doesn't feel like you're getting blindsided or caught off guard.

Yes.

And Kristen mentioned, like it doesn't get easier, right?

We always hear like, no, we always hear like, oh, it's it'll get easier as we get older.

Right?

That's that's what we hear all the time.

Whether your kid has a disability or not.

We hear that all the time.

What.

It doesn't get easier.

Car like that is so discouraging.

Is that is that true?

It is so true.

I'm living it myself.

Because I have a middle schooler and a high schooler.

And you would think that because, like, the school year, it kind of repeats as they go through the years that it would get easier.

But it's almost like every school year you're starting over and starting fresh.

You're having to kind of like dust off and be like, okay, what worked well?

And like what is kind of a good plan for us and our family and our child, and then figuring out what worked well with last year's team and hoping that this new team, even if you have somebody who was a team member for years, will the whole team adopt that philosophy?

Because to Kristen's point, once you start hitting the older grades, there's more people involved, which means more different personalities, more different.

Well, I think it should go this way.

And also just different perspectives to take into account.

And also our kids start rapidly changing because now we're also dealing with hormones and other big changes that are happening to them that are just natural.

And then throw on top of that how their disability disabilities impacting them.

And then you have other things to consider.

Like now they're going to possibly have lockers and practicing those combinations.

And there's a tight time to get in between classes.

And there's just more opportunities for things to go sideways or be a hardship.

And so one of the things, again, that we try to encourage parents to do is, it's a technique I actually just shared in a training recently.

It's approach every school year with the ABCs, a being asked lots of questions.

There's never a bad question to ask.

And if you don't get the answer to this point, keep asking.

Like Brie has a solid question.

She wants an answer.

Yeah.

And so keep asking those questions that are really, really important.

The B stands for being patient and being patient.

Not necessarily just with staff, but with your child, with yourself.

Because I as we all said, there's a lot of stress with back to school with navigating the school year.

So giving yourself some grace of there's going to be some wrinkles, there's going to be some bumps.

But that's why you have us here at Strawbridge that you can call and kind of have as a base to let out some of what you're thinking or feeling or troubleshoot it.

And then it's also an opportunity for you to try to figure out how can we improve communication.

And that's what the C stands for.

And sometimes we think we're communicating clearly.

But for whatever reason like the receiver of our message isn't getting it.

Yeah.

And so again that's where we try to help tease out.

Well how could we clear up the communication.

How could we ensure that Brie and Kristen's children are getting what they need?

The staff understand the needs beyond the IEPs or the 5 or 4 plans, because what I like to tell families is while we write the best plans that we can, and we try to create them to be solid and strong, our kids are living, breathing humans, and they're constantly growing and changing.

And so we need to keep that into account, because sometimes as families, we think, well, we made a good plan.

We have to sub write it out, and we don't take that opportunity to be proactive of, hey, you know what?

It feels like it's being bumpy, a little bit longer than it probably should, and talking with your school team about that and trying to figure out what we can change or adapt to help our children to have success.

And, Kara, I want you to talk about what Star Bridge does because, what is your organization do and how can parents utilize your organization?

So we offer a wealth of resources and, the information for families across the Rochester and surrounding state and specifically my department, the parent Training Information center, we do educational advocacy for families.

And so what that means is, parents or others can fill out our referral form online or reach out to our intake line and be connected to one of the family education specialists such as myself.

And we kind of get to know you.

If I was working with Brie, I'd say, hey, brief, tell me a little bit more, get to know what's going on for her son, and we'd start troubleshooting the concern that she has.

We stay involved as much or as little as the family wants, because we really see ourselves as being your partner, not your decision maker, or being able to do those things on your behalf.

In addition, we offer workshops and trainings for families, that are free of charge that you can find on our events calendar.

And those workshops really give parents the opportunity to know what their rights are.

To know kind of some tips, resources of how to navigate different situations.

Anything from I think my child has a disability and how do I start that process to what do I do to get ready for an annual review, to talking about effective communication and talking about some of the big things that happen, in the course of children's lives, which relate to behaviors.

Because one of the other things we don't realize is behaviors, communication.

And granted, it's not very clear.

It's communication.

And we got to unpack that.

So that way we can better support our students.

Yes, yes.

That's behavior is communication.

Kristen, you said that, Tony has gone through five different schools.

Buildings.

Buildings, buildings.

Yeah.

Tell me about that process.

And is was there a, a time where it just worked and what worked?

Yeah.

So, you know, kindergarten, we started off in, a small there were 12 kids in the class, one teacher for Aids.

And then mid-year, we went to a co-taught class, and we stayed there until Covid hit.

To be honest with you.

And I think Covid, not just for our kids with disabilities, for all kids, was like this kind of eye opening thing.

And, at that time, then he, you know, we were we had a 1 to 1 aide and it worked for him.

But I think with his 1 to 1 aid, what didn't work was he was still in the classroom but wasn't being included.

Right.

He had his own desk in the back of the classroom.

So it was like he was there but not really there.

And when I think of inclusion and belonging, as Cara mentioned, you want them to feel like they have a voice and you want them to feel like they're part of the team, not just a seat in the back of the room that they're going to sit in.

So at that point, we actually went to like an out of district placement, and that worked really well because it was a, a holistic approach to integrated teaching.

So not only was it classroom education, but it was community based education.

So the teacher would take them out into the community, take them to Wegmans, they'd have to make a grocery list.

And this is like in fourth grade.

Yeah.

She would take them to the I remember she took them to the bank.

We came home one day.

We're like, she's like, we're opening up a checking account.

So I'm like at fourth grade.

Like we're opening up checking accounts here.

You know, and she took them to the dorms.

Like, if I want to bring in $10, we're going to have them make change.

And, by Christmas gifts for you.

And it worked really well because not only did it take that those practical skills that you learn in education, but it also apply to the things that he really is going to need to learn in the environment.

That program closed because of Covid.

So we went back into the district, and when we went back in district, the program was no longer at the building.

That was literally like a football field from my home.

So we had to go to a new building again.

And then where our district that they're at, there's two middle schools, so it's like two middle schools, and everyone comes together just for ninth grade.

And then high schools are completely different.

So even just typical kids, they have three different changes from sixth grade to 12th grade.

And then you throw in those special education programs and it changes.

But really what what worked for him was this multi-sensory, community based approach.

And, I have a hard time with education and truth be told, because I'm always like, why does vocational training start so late for our kids, especially when we know that our kids on the autism spectrum thrive off of that routine and repetitiveness and, and, you know, doing the same thing over and over again until they get it and finding something that they like and being able to do it and, brick and mortar in my eyes, is it for my child?

It just is not what he's going to thrive on.

And so we're kind of stuck until high school, you know, because that's when the options for more vocational training and more, community based life skills program really starts.

I wish it started younger, but, that is what is successful for my team, for my child and feeling like he belongs, you know, that was the most thing too, is when he was in that program, even though it was an out of school or out of district program, it was still in his home building.

So the Boces program came into the building to run that program.

He was like a little mayor.

Everyone knew who he was.

They would give him a job.

Yeah, like popular public.

It's like, yeah, this guy's on campus.

Yeah.

They let him get the microphone every Friday during lunch and sing, and everyone would clap him on and cheer him on.

And it's like, that's that's what you know, we always say we worry what happens when our kids get older, right?

I was just having this discussion with someone today that's like, you have to have that community.

People have to know who your child is, because if people know who your child is, they're always going to look out for, you know, for that child, it's when they're in isolation and people don't know who your child is.

That's when instances happen and people are like, I don't know who this child is.

I don't know who it is.

You know, I want people to know who my child is with or without me here.

Yeah.

That's important.

That's powerful.

And I could appreciate that.

And, Bree, what what would the ideal placement look like for you?

For Kyrie?

For school?

Yes.

Well, starting off, his pre-K school, I really loved it.

I really enjoyed him being there.

They were super helpful with me.

Even with Kyrie, he thrived like a lot from beginning of the school year to the end of the school year.

So I would, you know, that's that's what I would like I would I would like him to be back where he was at.

So, you know, change is high for, for for our kids and I'm nervous about sending him to a new school around new people, around new teachers, new everything.

Again, like she said, you don't know how people treat your kid when you're not there.

You just hope for the best.

And I know my son, he gets a little crazy sometimes.

Or sometimes it's hard to calm him down.

Sometimes you calm down like that, and, you know, other people don't know how to deal with stuff like that.

And I feel like his last school day, you know, they deal with it pretty well.

They communicated with me a lot, like anytime and anything they communicated.

If I asked anything, it was no answer.

No.

No problem with them answering me back.

So that's that's what I like.

I, I will love that for my son.

Even though the school year didn't start and we're going to see how the new schools turn out.

Oh I wish I wish him the best.

That was.

Yeah, yeah.

Sometimes we're more afraid than our kid.

Yeah, yeah, we are a lot of times more afraid than our kids.

And you bring up a really good point.

We're going to get you connected to a family education specialist after we leave.

Michelle.

But you bring up making connections.

Yeah.

You bring up a very good point about communication.

And I know we've talked about this a little bit, but, there is another tool too, is asking your team beforehand, how are you going to communicate with me and establishing that up front?

Because a lot of times we're relying on our those teams to tell us how, you know, you're with my child six hours a day and you know, you mentioned recall your child is nonverbal and your child has limited language in my child.

You were expecting the team to tell us what's going on in their day.

They can't always answer our questions for us.

So before you go in kindergarten, if I if I leave here today, that's the one thing that I like.

Thank you.

You know, whether it's a journal that comes home each day or an app that they use, make sure that you understand how your team is going to communicate with them when you have needs.

And I used to feel like the teachers were sick of me, because any little thing I was on that at takes them like, how is you today?

How is this?

I was that, but they were very helpful with me.

And even though there weren't going to be his, kindergarten teachers move into kindergarten.

And I just like that school environment, like everything they, they they were they were good for people with intellectual disabilities.

So yeah.

Yeah.

So we're going to we're going to take a quick little break.

And when we get back we're going to continue this discussion, especially with Kyra, because I want to know how do issues of equity and inclusion show up in your work, Kyra.

So we'll take a quick break and we'll be right back.

We're talking about navigating the back to school system with a child with disabilities right here on connections.

I'm Veronica Volk, coming up in our second hour of connections, a rebroadcast of a recent conversation about understanding gene therapy for babies and young children.

When a parent hears a newborn has a genetic condition that could affect the rest of their lives, they may be scared or confused.

This hour, our host, Evan Dawson, sat down with two local mothers who share their family's stories.

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And we're back with sexy connections.

I'm Raquel Steven, and we're talking about navigating the school system with a child with disabilities.

And in studio with me, I have Bryn Tasia Johnson and her son Kyrie, and I have Kristin Lopez.

She's a communications manager at Star Bridge and also a parent of a child with disabilities, Tony Antonio.

And remotely, I have Cara Georgie.

She's a family, education specialist at Star Bridge.

And just joining me in the studio, I have Shani Elzey and she also has a son with disabilities.

So we're just going to continue this discussion.

Kyra, I want to ask you, how do issues of equity and inclusion show up in your work?

They show up literally every day.

And it can range anything from just lack of resources.

Lack of being able to have the capacity to take in additional training, situational information because you're just stretched so thin, just trying to do the everyday life stuff on top of trying to raise your child and get them in education.

The other barrier that I would say that a lot of families are facing is just the waitlists for services and the lack of providers, and so not every family can drive multiple cities away to go access the supports or get the treatment or the diagnosis that they need.

And many times those are costly.

And there's barriers with insurance and things like that of who will cover, who won't cover.

And then I would say there's also even just the, the challenges that schools themselves face with not being fully equipped to be able to handle the wide variety of needs that their families are coming to them with.

And so it's trying to figure out how do we help to support our students and not saying we're going to target and support these students, and we're just going to say special education services will ensure our kids with disabilities get through.

No, it's our children with disabilities deserve the right and the pathways to reach for the stars just as much as any other child who walks through those school doors.

And those opportunities does need to be provided, and it may take some additional creative thinking outside of the box, or finding those champions, or those people who may not be always the traditional people we tap into for those supports, for those students, and giving those opportunities to them so that they can really succeed.

And I feel like one of the things our agency really does well is the collaboration with schools to try to think creatively like that.

And when schools have the opportunities to partner with other nonprofits or us, it gives them the opportunity to say, oh, we never thought of it like that, or we never would have thought this could have been possible.

And it just gives them a chance to take pause because we take that opportunity to do some reflective listening.

If we hear you saying so, that way we there's some sense of validation for everyone in the room.

But then the okay, but how are we going to level up?

How are we going to make sure that we're all showing up in the best way we can to support the students that are in our care for each school year, for that 180 days, and make them the most impactful 180 days possible.

Thank you Cara.

And I wanted to get Shauna on this conversation.

And can you can you tell us a little bit about about your son Princeton and, and what, what do you go through back to school season.

So with my son for instance he's going to make.

So yeah for my son Princeton, he's now 12.

He'll be 13.

So you know, you think about a 12 year old, a 13 year old, however he's disabled.

So with him he's got a lot of different challenges, like he's had placement since early on with his school and things like that.

So that's going well, however, is things like, oh, we don't have transportation the first couple weeks of school.

Yeah.

So you've got to get him to school, you've got to get him from school.

And we don't care about your job, you know, you know, oh, you've got to work.

Well, you've got to get him to school and you got to get him from.

Yeah.

And if you can't, then, well, you've got to provide the care.

So those are the challenges that I'm seeing with him because every year it's different.

And most I would say within the last two years it's been an issue randomly where there's no bussing.

Yeah.

And if you don't have transportation then what do you do.

Yeah.

So it's it's a lot.

So you said he's been placed early right.

Early on your your okay.

You're satisfied with with his current placement.

What are things that are working where he's at that you I find I find where he was placed early on when he first left the Nic unit, he went to I forget the name of the school, but he went to a school for a couple of years.

Loved it.

The teachers, the staff there, they actually love the children.

So they move with them sometimes.

So some of his teachers are now like the principal at the school he's at now.

So it's like they love these kids and they they follow the kids.

So it helps.

So things like that have helped me.

Whereas, you know, I don't I don't have other issues or challenges, but those things mean a lot.

You know, when they see you and they know your name, they see your kid, they know your kid, you know, and they know their temperament.

They know how to calm them even sometimes better than you.

So those things help you?

Yeah.

Because I get a lot of advice from teachers like, well, he likes this.

I'm like, really?

I don't want Amazon to get that right now.

So there is that relationship between parent and teacher is very is essential, especially when your kid finds, a teacher or therapies that they really cling to.

Yeah.

That I feel like that has been very helpful in me navigating, this, this journey as well.

Now, car, I know this is this is a loaded question here, but we hear a lot about IEPs, and I've never heard about 504 plans.

What what what are these plans and and how do they help getting kids in the right support?

But absolutely, it's a great question.

And when we get quite frequently is which one is better, which one is the best.

And what I would say is it's which one is appropriate for the needs that your child is showing.

So an IEP means that your child needs specially designed instruction tailored to them as a result of the disability that they have.

5 or 4 plans are accommodations and modifications to the classroom learning environment that promote access to the Ed, the curriculum and the learning that's happening.

And so for that, that means that your child might need to have, an an extra sheet of notes that actually has kind of like spaces for them to put in words.

They maybe don't have to be responsible to take all of the notes by hand.

Maybe they need to have, extra breaks built in.

Maybe they need to be able to have extra reminders or reminders tailored to them in a certain way.

Because we all know executive functioning skills.

Remembering things is a lot for some of our children with disabilities, and they need those extra supports.

And so that's the big distinction between a 504 plan and an IEP.

And the end of the day, the big thing to note, too, is that there's a lot of informal things that classroom teachers can do to support all of their students, who both have disabilities and without.

But that's where it gets at.

What you were just speaking about, of that educator who's just magic and clicks with your child, it's important to talk with them throughout the school year of the techniques they're trying, the different tools they're using to support your child, because then that equips you as the parent to have that knowledge base, to add it into the kind of your toolbox as you're doing your advocacy for following years and recognizing, too, that sometimes that tool works for a while and then it stops.

Yeah, but it doesn't mean don't ever go back to it, because sometimes those tried and true things that helped our children when they were young can be very beneficial to them as they get older.

And so that communication piece, again, can't be stressed enough.

And again, this is where you talk to the school and find out what it is they're doing and ask questions like, could you help me understand what strategies are you using to support my child in math class?

What strategy are you using for our nonverbal students to show us what they know?

And to prove that they are growing in their learning.

So.

So what, should a parent do or family do when they feel like their needs are not being met?

The first thing they should do is reach out to the classroom teacher, or if they're in the older grades, because there's a team of teachers, reach out to the team and ask to meet with them.

Most teachers have a built in period, or teams have a built in time that they meet together, to work on things just like this.

And so by getting together with them, you can share what your concerns are and work on finding out what do this classroom teacher see and then figure out what our next steps because sometimes it can be an informal thing that the classroom teacher or teachers are able to do.

But sometimes it could be something related more specifically to that 5 or 4 plan, needing some updates or changes or even, the IEP needing some updates or changes, because maybe over the summer that extended school year at somehow, even though it's just that thing to hold the gap, it somehow helped our child because something clicked.

And so now we need to change the goals.

And so then that would be a CAC meeting.

And if you're ever unsure, that's when you always can reach out to us at Star Bridge and talk to one of the family education specialists and be like, hey, this is happening.

I'm not really sure.

Like, what could I do?

What are my options?

Because that's what we love to help families think through, of what could they do and empower you to make the choice that's right for you and your family?

Thank you, Carver, for that great information.

I want to ask the parents, how do your kids feel about going back to school?

Is there a level of anxiety, or are they excited?

And how does that, affect how you prepare?

I think my son is excited.

He loves going anywhere.

So, you know, he loves the bus ride sometimes, not all the time, but he loves the drivers, especially if the driver is by.

Hey buddy, you know, so if he can connect with anyone, he's going to love you, you know?

So he loves going to school out here.

Oh, he's so, so handsome little guy.

You know, when he gets off that bus is like, he knows he's there and he's, like waving at us and looking at us all.

And so it's like he loves it.

However, it brings anxiety sometimes because it's like, okay, well, is he going to be in the same room with these children that he loves?

And, you know, these teachers that have supported him so well, you know, is he going to be in an environment where they're just going to get him because they see what they're saying and what the mom saying, you know, things like that.

So sometimes it's like, oh, he's so excited.

But I don't know, you know, because they'll be like, well, he had a terrible day today.

You know, he wasn't very happy.

But you know, this is him.

You know, we have to figure out what's making him sad and what makes him happy.

But he he loves it, so we're fine.

I guess.

My son, he doesn't know that he's going back to school yet.

He's going to be surprised when he gets on that bus.

But he loves school.

And like you said, he loves being on the bus.

Sometimes he has his days.

But, I'm just nervous about him being in a new school.

I'm not really.

I'm nervous about Kyree, too, but that's more so.

What I'm nervous about is him going to a new school, but other than that, he doesn't know it yet.

But he's going to know when he sees that bus and hopefully he's happy about it.

Kristen, having having that, experience right with with Tony, how how is he every back to school season?

Waking him up is always the biggest challenge.

He likes to sleep and he's hitting the the puberty years, so, you know, he likes to sleep, but, he he he doesn't mind going to school.

The morning sometimes can be a little bit challenging for it.

For the most part, he's he's happy once he's there.

He knows every Friday he gets a McDonald's Happy Meal every single Friday.

That is his treat.

So he.

The countdown starts on Monday.

Four more days, three more days.

So everything is a countdown and the teachers use it and the bus drivers use it.

And then on Fridays, sometimes the bus drivers even give him, French fry coupons on Fridays, like they're so great.

So it's all like this collaborative team effort.

They all he makes everyone know that he's getting franchise.

Well, they've got it.

They've got to know they got it.

Yes.

So but he, he he doesn't mind school.

It's he actually it's more or less getting him up in the morning.

The routine.

You know, just getting him out of the house is, is this thing, because he's definitely, I always say bigger kids, bigger challenges.

And sleeping, I guess is one of them is he defines the true teenager boy.

He likes to sleep.

Yes.

Yeah.

And they do like like we said earlier, behavior is a telltale sign.

Sometimes my son doesn't want to get on the bus in the morning, like, okay, maybe he had a rough school day the day prior and other days he can't wait.

He's running to the bus and I'm a little insulted, like, okay, hold on now.

Yes.

And and this is my son for first full year of like a full day of school, like before he was in pre-K, so he only went for like two and 2.5 hours.

Now he's going to be gone for like six hours.

And I'm I'm a little nervous about that too.

I don't know how he's going to do with a full day in a new school that he's not familiar with, but, you hope the best for him.

Yeah.

You might be more nervous.

Yeah, I think so.

And, Kara, what would you say?

What?

What advice would you give to a parent like Brie, who is about to send their child with disabilities to school for the first time?

I love that question.

I was hoping you would come back with it.

And one of the things that I would say is set a goal for yourself.

Besides, just we're going to survive the school year, but how you can possibly thrive?

And whether it's we're going to track our milestones, whether there's going to be a celebration thing like Kristen does with her son, but set a goal for you and your family.

So that way, even if things are rocky and bumpy, there's something that's positive and hopeful that you can kind of tap into.

I myself do a gratitude jar.

And so at the end of each week, we find one thing to be grateful for, even if it's, oh my gosh, like, we got out the door on time every day.

So finding ways to find those positive moments, the other thing that I would encourage families to do is to take a moment to just kind of reflect on what did work last year and what it what are those areas that you're kind of concerned about.

To Brie's point, she's concerned about communication already.

She's concerned about knowing how is days going to go.

So trying to build those out that will help you in your communication.

As you're starting to build that relationship with the team.

And as Kristen shared, that All About Me letter is a powerful way to kind of help school staff get to know your child before they've even met them, or stepped foot in the door.

And so it's just a personal way to connect.

And then also chatting with the team and saying, hey, I work these hours.

This is the best way to reach me and how to, get in touch.

But also asking them, how do they prefer to be communicated with?

Because again, that's the beginnings of a good, strong relationship.

And lastly, I'd encourage everybody selfishly to check out the Sturbridge calendar for our events and see if there's any that are interesting.

That could possibly be beneficial as you're getting ready to start the school year and safer and take line number into your phone.

So that way if you do have something that comes up, even if it's just a question, you have our number handy.

And that way you can reach out.

Because one of the things we really trying to do is live out our tagline every day of, how can we help you and your family to have hope as you start the school year and all school year long, and how can we help you navigate the ups, downs and all around that come with every school year?

And so we look forward to being able to be a partner with the community and with the families to hopefully help this school year to be a successful one for everyone.

In Kyra, you answered that really well.

Here's another trick question for you.

What advice would you give to teachers and administrators preparing to welcome students with disabilities?

Oh, this is a good I'm an educator, so I would my advice would be to remind educators that one of the reasons parents who have children disabilities come.

So communicate, live with them, come off as being very, inquisitive is because our hearts are literally walking outside our bodies for a huge portion of our day, and we don't want our children to feel like they're just coasting and surviving another school year.

We want to know that they're thriving, that they're growing, and that we're giving them the best opportunity for success and a positive future that we can, and that we understand their job as hard and when that time gets really hard for them, whether it's with our own child or it's just a tough school year to reach out and see us as their partner.

And I would encourage every teacher this school year to find one family that you can build a really, really strong relationship with and watch how that partnership can change how you teach and how you approach not only their child, but all the other children in your classroom.

It's truly a recipe for success if you're open to try it.

Oh, you nailed it.

I thought I was I thought I was a trick question for you, but you nailed it.

For the parents, giving advice to the younger parents who are adjusting their kids to school for the first time, what worked for you and what is something that you would some advice you would give to a parent like Bree?

Build that communication early.

I know Kara talked about that, but build the communication early.

I before I even worked for Star Verge.

I use it for services because I needed help with my communication.

And funny, I'm a communications director, but it's different when it your child.

It's personal.

Right.

And I think that one of the things that I had to learn is you get a lot further with honey and spice.

So, you know, when you come in combative, you have to learn.

And I had to learn the hard way myself.

In kindergarten.

I have a relationship, you know, when you have an IEP or a kid with a disability, you can stay in school until 22 years old.

Yeah.

So I'm like, I have 17 years to work with this district.

I can either starting a bad foot or good fight.

And so I really needed to learn how to ask questions.

Because I knew that schools like data.

Right.

And how am I going to ask my questions to get the data that I needs?

It gets them the data that they need to be successful.

And that was really the biggest thing I would say communicating, learning how to communicate with the school team.

And then going back to what I suggested to you as finding out the best way that your team likes to be communicated so that you know how your child is.

I always say I am an extension of what happens in school.

If something's working in school and successful, I want to be an extension at home to that.

So finding out what is what is working in the classroom so that I can continue and carry over that learning at home.

Oh my honey has a little spice in it.

It's not bad.

Have a little spice is not all spice.

And what's one thing that would make back to school makes back to school season easier for your family that you can you can share?

Is really you support, you know, just making sure you've got all everything in order.

So because if one thing is messed up and that's messing everything up and, you know, you have to be ready because again, like what the bussing how they did it that one time, we didn't know we weren't going to have bussing for our children.

You know, my son is disabled.

He's in a wheelchair.

So if I don't have a wheelchair vehicle, how am I getting him there?

Let's think about it.

You know what I'm saying?

So it's like, excuse me?

It's like, you gotta really have everything in order and lay it out and backup's like, in my mind, I'm always thinking of a backup.

Like, I've always got to be on top of it.

Because if I don't have a backup, I'm not going.

I can't do it.

He's not going.

We, you know, so we just got to be prepared like that.

That's what keeps us afloat, basically.

So the key takeaway is communicate, create a community and have a plan B, always have a plan B.

Thank you guys for sharing your stories and your resources with us here on WXXI connections.

Thank you Kyra Shawnee Brie Kristen, I wish you all the best school year.

I'll be dealing with it too.

So check in on me.

I wish you all the best.

Thank you for tuning in.

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