(thunder crashes) ♪ One day the devil came to him ♪ ♪ For he was a minor demon ♪ ♪ Asked him to torture some humans ♪ ♪ With his two friends in tow ♪ ♪ Mittens and El Sapo ♪ ♪ The Baron Mondo Von Doren ♪ ♪ On Nightmare Theatre ♪ You know, Mittens?

I admit I love a good slab of olive loaf or a nice, thick slice of baloney just as much as the next guy.

Even that baloney with the red ring around it.

Remember that liverwurst stuff that came in that little plastic tube?

Yeah, that stuff sort of smelled like feet.

But I love that stuff.

No one loves processed luncheon meats as much as I do.

Give me a tube of Braunschweiger, some crackers, some mustard and RC Cola and maybe a moon pie.

And I'll be set for the day or at least half today.

But kids in the seventies really love processed meat.

Oh, yeah.

No, no, I'm 100% serious.

Kids would literally burst into songs about me.

There were songs about hot dogs, and it wasn't unusual to see an entire school bus full of kids start singing this song at the top of their lungs.

And then there was that kid on the fishing dock.

He sang about his love for his baloney.

And believe me, that song was an infectious groove, a true earworm.

It was all about the man who made the baloney.

What?

Of course, I know the words coming from my baloney has a400.

Wait, wait, wait.

I see that we're on.

Later.

I'll sing you the song of the Dr. Pepper people.

Hello and welcome to the Nightmare Theater.

I'm your host, The Bear in Mondo Von Doren.

And here with me is Britain's The Werewolf.

And we were just discussing things kids of all ages love to sing about.

As we wait for the man virtually no one could love and will surely never sing about.

El Sapo de Tempesto to arrive with tonight's movie.

I'm not quite sure where he could be.

He'll probably be.

Here I am, fellas.

Hey, But hey, How you guys doing tonight?

What?

Oh, wait.

You are here, right?

He does smell a little bit like that liverwurst stuff.

Thanks.

Thanks, Mittens.

Now, I'll never be able to enjoy that stuff again.

Why do you smell like meat?

Where are you?

Down at the meat processing plant again?

No, I'm still banned from that place.

But I was on another mission today.

I had to mail a few things, so I went down to the post office.

Oh, the post office?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I had to mail the rent check.

I had to mail a few letters and some cards and affidavits and whatnot.

Well, how.

Long could that possibly have taken?

Longer than you might think.

See, remember when I created all those Von Doren brand postage stamps?

You know, the ones that had me, you and Mittens on them?

Yeah, well, it turns out the postmaster general does, too, because she and her goon squad was waiting for me down there.

Got it?

It appears you were right.

A citizen cannot make his own stamps.

Yeah, I told you that.

So They gave me a hard time.

Words were exchanged, fingers were pointed, punches were thrown.

And that postmaster general has a heck of a left for such a small little lady.

Sapo monkeying with the US mail is a federal offense.

I tried to warn you about that.

I gave him the slip.

I was able to find a mail truck with the keys, and so I took it upon myself and I deputized myself as a mailman and I drove it to freedom.

I got in that truck and I drove it like I stole it, which I did.

I had the pedal to the metal and the engine was running hotter than a boiling kettle.

Now, you didn't park that out front, did you?

Of course not.

I parked it in the guy in the sub sub sub sub basement spot.

Well, that'll fool them.

Let me ask you something important.

Way ahead of their boss.

I'm fine.

I took a beating.

I'm a little worse for wear, but I'm good for tonight.

No, I mean, do you have a movie for tonight?

Well, no, I don't.

But in the mail truck, I found this can in a small package.

And there was a fruitcake in there, too.

But I ate all of the fruitcake myself.

Can you show that while I run and find a movie?

Well, I guess as usual, I'll have to.

All I.

Why couldn't you have choked on that fruitcake, folks, I have a nagging secret fear.

I know what this is, and you do, too.

So let's just show it and move on with our lives.

- The Volkites!

We're trapped!

- Quick, the elevator!

The elevator's down!

- The smoke will clear in a moment, Your Majesty.

- Never mind.

Even if he escaped the atom gun, his fall down the shaft will have killed him.

- That's funny, Captian, I didn't find any trace of those two other strangers from the upper world.

- The boy was recaptured by Sharad's men, and the lieutenant disappeared.

(beeping noise) Answer that!

- Imperial stables.

- The body of Crash Corrigan lies on the base of the elevator shaft.

Remove it at once.

- Yes, sir.

- Lieutenant Corrigan has escaped.

- He's likely on his way to Sharad for help, but it won't do him any good.

As soon as you complete building suitable rocket motors, I'll take this tower with all of its scientific equipment to the upper world, where I'll either conquer or destroy it!

- You're mad to think I'd help you to destroy my own people!

- Perhaps you will change your mind.

Prepare the transforming ray!

- The black robes are coming!

- I've come to see the holy Sharad, high priest of Atlantis.

- The man lies!

He's an escaped prisoner who slew one of our charioteers.

- Seize him, he's a black robe!

- I tell you, I've got to see Sharad!

- Throw him in the dungeon.

After him, men!

- I insist on seeing the high priest.

- Lock him in the dungeon!

- Why did your father come to the Undersea Kingdom of Atlantis?

- He didn't intend to.

We were in our submarine when something went wrong, and the first thing we knew.

we were here!

- Oh, exalted one.

We have captured the stranger from the upper world.

- That's Crash Corrigan, the man I've been telling you about.

- What have you done with him?

- I ordered him thrown into the dungeon with the other prisoners.

- He didn't do anything!

- He slew one of our charioteers.

- Enough!

The law is clear.

Only life can pay for life.

Lieutenant Corrigan shall be pitted against the captive black robes in mortal combat!

- If it's a fair fight, I know Crash will win!

If he does, he shall be granted his freedom.

Get the prisoners ready and summon the people!

- There's no need for alarm.

The transforming ray will not harm him, but merely bend his will to mine.

When the professor has finished building the rocket motors that will carry this tower to the upper world, his mind will be restored.

- The transformer is in readiness, Your Majesty.

- Proceed with the transformation!

(no audio) Release him!

- Professor Norton!

Don't you know me?

It's Diana!

- Master!

- Are you ready to build the rocket motors?

- Yes, Master!

Your word is law, Master!

- Take him to the laboratory!

(laughs evilly) (bugle fanfare) - Get back!

I told you to stay back!

- Come on, Crash, don't let him -- come on, Crash!

- Attaboy, Crash!

Hit him in the stomach!

Throw him!

- The gates are still open.

We'll make our escape in this chariot!

- We'll wait our chance!

I knew you'd do it, Crash!

- Bring the sacred sword of victory.

To the victor goes honor and freedom.

To the loser - death!

Proceed!

Your action is an insult to our sacred rites!

The people will decide your fate - We'll grab their high priest!

- Let go, Crash!

You'll be killed!

Well hello and welcome back, that was chapter three of the Undersea Kingdom, laughably called the Arena of Death.

Looks like Crash is in for some road rash or dirt rash or whatever.

I hope that chariot runs over rock cactuses, broken bottles, porcupines, sand, spurs and bear trap.

Just everyone on the planet.

Maybe we've finally seen the last of Crash, and I'll spend the rest of the cereal in the skin graft unit of the hospital.

Well, I know.

I know, folks, I have nothing else to say about what we just saw.

Only that what we just saw won't be how the next chapter starts.

It's a shame, a crying shame.

Speaking of shame, I wonder where all Sapo is with tonight's movie.

Hey, guys.

How's the other night going?

How do you think it's going?

Wait, wait.

Before you answer, where's tonight's movie?

Well, that's kind of what I wanted to talk about.

You see, I mean, that is to say, we.

I mean, I'd as a say, I mean, we don't have one.

There's not one in the entire compound.

Really.

I'm serious.

I really tried hard to find one, but no luck.

I don't know what we're going to do tonight.

You know, something happened.

Fine.

The movie's not that hard of a task.

I would think it'd be easiest thing in the world for you.

We're in a studio after all.

I don't know about that, but it's pretty hard.

Anyone, literally anyone, can find a movie.

Oh, do you think that you could do it.

With one hand tied behind my foot and my head in a bucket of concrete?

Well, I don't know about that, boss.

I had my head stuck in the book of the cement for six weeks.

Once the Sapo.

No one cares about that.

The point is, I bet I could find a movie without even trying.

In fact, just to show you how easy it is, I'm going to go and find one.

Well, hello and welcome back.

Okay?

You be me for a while, and I'll be.

You know, I'm going to find a movie.

Okay?

Wait, wait.

I don't know what to do, folks.

He's going to be gone for quite a while because finding a movie is not easy.

And I should know I have a certificate in movie.

Find Dory from Van Doren Technical Junior College.

I really don't have anything ready to show you, so I guess me and minions are going to have to do greater Tuna.

The long version while the boss looks for a movie.

Found one.

What?

There's no way you could have found a movie that fast.

Not only did I find a movie, I found one of the best movies of all time.

In fact, the movie I found is, by any definition, a masterpiece.

It's an amazing film that is influenced on some level, just about every director who ever lived.

Does it have Randy Quaid in it?

It does not.

Stuart Pinkard.

No.

Dennis Weaver.

No.

Sapo This is an old movie.

This movie was made a long time ago.

Dennis Weaver's dad in it?

No, it doesn't have anyone, you know.

And it stars Max Schreck.

Who that big green guy runs around with that donkey.

No, Mac.

Shrek was a German actor in this film.

He plays gruff or a lot.

That does sound interesting.

Really?

You find that interesting?

You know what I find interesting?

Me write.

You find me interesting, right?

You're not even remotely.

I find it interesting that you haven't yet asked me the name of the movie.

By gosh, you're right.

I haven't.

What is the name of this movie, boss?

I'm glad you asked.

Suppose.

See, this movie is called Nosferatu.

A symphony of Horror.

And before you say anything else, I'm well aware of the fact that you haven't heard of this movie.

See, Szabo.

This is an actual good movie, and I found it.

And how long did it take.

Minton's I think he was gone for about an hour or two.

And that.

Right.

Doesn't matter what you think about an hour or two.

I wasn't even gone for a minute.

Sure seemed like a long time.

I found a great movie and less than a minute.

Maybe you planted that movie earlier on.

The off chance that I couldn't find one.

I did no such thing.

Well, what.

Is so great about this movie?

There's a lot of great things in this movie, and this one is rather a special edition.

Ooh, does it have a blooper reel and a whole bunch of deleted scenes?

Maybe a director's commentary track where he tells funny stories about how the movie was made.

So this is a silent film.

A silent film that doesn't make any sense.

Yes.

And we are lucky in that the version I found has a musical score by some friends of.

Mine, Larry Gatlin and the Gatlin Brothers.

Those guys are not friends of mine.

The musical score was done by a band called Analog Missionary.

Oh, there are Dream prog band from southern Alabama.

They're known for using atypical instrumentation and world music influences.

They've released three full length albums Air, sea Transmitter and Voyage of the Demeter Voyages.

The Meat of the Demeter is their original soundtrack to Nosferatu, and they have performed it live on several occasions before an audience with the film playing Folks, you're in for a real treat tonight.

This is truly one of the greatest films ever made.

I am just so excited.

Let's just get right into it.

But how can a movie be silent?

How do you know what the people in the film are saying?

What if a car horn honks if it?

Folks, I alone am proud to present this incredible film.

Nosferatu, A symphony of horror here on Nightmare Theater.

Hello and welcome back.

What the heck was that.

Was that some kind of stray dog or did they just train a skunk or something?

Or was that supposed to be some kind of cat.

That was a werewolf, Sapo Mittens, I ask you, does that look like you or any one of your kin folks?

He's right.

It's called suspension of disbelief.

The viewer can believe it's a werewolf on the screen because the character in the film tells you it's a werewolf.

That doesn't look like any werewolf I've ever seen.

Well, maybe they should have hired you to be the werewolf.

Maybe no audience was.

They.

They were much more trusting, for lack of a better word.

Back then.

If someone said there was a werewolf nearby and the next scene showed an animal of some kind, the viewer would logically think that was the werewolf.

Like if someone said there was a lunatic on the loose and then they showed a picture of you, folks would conclude that you were the missing lunatic.

Keep in mind, suppose this movie was made in 1922.

You know.

I didn't realize this movie was that old.

Yeah, it's over 100 years old.

No way.

Yes.

Yeah, it is.

It was released in May of 1922.

I didn't even know they had movies back then.

Oh, sure they did.

You know, I learn something new every day when I'm around you, boss.

But here's the question.

Smart guy who directed this film?

Well, it was directed by the great F.W.

Murnau.

He directed 21 films, one of his films, Sunrise, which he directed in 1927, is considered one of the best films ever made.

He truly had an artist's eye.

He was also extremely well-educated and converse on a length that many subjects like me.

Just like.

Me.

No, not like you at all.

Well, how many movies did you say he made?

21.

21 films?

Yeah.

But unfortunately, eight of these are considered lost forever.

You know what else is lost forever?

Newton's two toys are lost.

No worse than that.

It's Murnau's skull.

In 2015, grave robbers broke into his tomb and stole his skull.

It's still missing to this day.

You know, I hope when I die, nobody swipes my skull.

I don't think you have to worry about that.

Unless the Museum of Medical Oddities gets wind of your passing.

And if they do, believe me, I will sell it to them for anyone who can steal it.

Folks, let's get right back into the movie made by a man who had his skull stolen.

Nosferatu here on Nightmare Theater.

Hello, and welcome back.

Isn't this just a great film?

Can you feel the suspense, the creeping terror, the growing unease in every scene?

This is amazing.

Too many words to read.

How do they expect a guy like me to follow this story?

And, you know, there hasn't even been one car chase, not enough shootouts on buildings, not enough helicopter rescues.

This is not my kind of movie.

I'm not surprised.

It's not your cup of tea.

I don't drink.

Tea.

That's just an expression.

As I was saying, I know it's not for you, but the people whose opinions really matter think this is beyond incredible.

Almost sublime.

I like sublime.

And that was a really good band.

No, they weren't.

My point is, the people who know recognize this is one of the most important films ever made.

For example, Werner Herzog said Nosferatu is the greatest German film ever made.

Guillermo del Toro said it's one of his favorite films.

Even that old crank, Roger Ebert loved it.

But you, of course, don't like it.

Well, one man's goose is another man's gander.

What?

What does that even mean?

You know what?

I don't care.

You don't like it.

And that's that.

It just seems you know, it seems like I might have seen this movie already.

You have it.

I swear.

I have.

Weight.

You know what it reminds me of?

I can't say that I do.

That reminds me of that Dracula movie.

We watched that one Christmas several years ago.

Well, well, well.

Funny you should say that.

What was that for?

You said it was funny.

Not that kind of funny.

See, this film heavily borrows from Bram Stoker's original story.

Like I heavily borrowed from the grocery store when no one's looking.

I guess.

Sort of like that.

Wait, there's a better way to tell this story.

Sapo What's that question you often ask me when you bring me bad movies?

Uh, can I get an advance on my paycheck?

No.

The other question.

How did this movie get me?

That's the one.

Here's what happened.

In 1916, a producer named Albin Groh got the idea to make a vampire movie.

He was stationed in Serbia during World War One, and many of the locals filled his head with vampire tales.

So when the war was over, he started a company, hired a writer, and then he hired Murnau to direct.

He wanted to do a retelling of Bram Stoker's Dracula, but Stoker's widow Florence Stoker, wouldn't sell him the rights, so he did what anyone would do.

He just changed the name of the vampire and tweaked a few minor details and made the movie anyway.

Well, then what happened?

Then What happened Then what happened?

Well, you think vampires are bad?

They're nothing compared to lawyers.

Stoker's widow sued, and she won.

Kraus Company went bankrupt.

But that's not the worst part of it, really.

What else happened?

Well, the judge ordered that every copy was to be destroyed.

But lucky for us, a copy had made its way to America and was being held in Universal Studios vault.

Despite the film being hidden unseen, it was already having an effect on other directors, as detailed in Dark Carnival, the biography of film director Todd Browning, written by film historians David J. Skal and Elias Saavedra Browning cinematographer Carl Freund and art director Charles D Hall all got together to view the print while prepping their film Dracula and took great inspiration from it.

Browning was a true visionary who lived an extraordinary life.

I highly recommend Dark Carnival, and for more info on Browning, visit your local library.

Long story short, over the years, this film became a global phenomenon.

Even SpongeBob SquarePants referenced Nosferatu in a Halloween episode.

But there was a time it was illegal to show the film.

Are you sure it's safe now?

Are we showing a hot film?

Can we get in trouble for this?

One more strike on my record.

The judge said he's going to weld that door shut.

And I bet this one is smart enough to seal up the window, too.

I'll have to tunnel out again.

Just calm down.

You're not going to jail.

Well, at least not for this.

Now, the film is in what's called the public domain.

The public domain?

What does that mean?

Well, it means the copyright is expired.

Things in the public domain are, for lack of a better way to say it, owned by the public.

Meaning what?

No, not like you.

Anyone can use them without paying a user or residual fee.

Well, what happens if you show something that is still protected?

Same thing that happened to this movie and the people who made it.

Gee, it's really too bad.

We don't know any lawyers and could get some great films, huh?

Yeah, that's too bad.

Folks, let's get back to the movie that bankrupted an entire studio.

Nosferatu here on Nightmare Theater.

Hello, and welcome back.

For once, I don't have to ask if you're enjoying the film, because I absolutely know you are.

It's a film I found.

I just don't see what the big deal is about.

You don't see why this film is important?

Well, as I've already said, the people who matter do think it's a good film.

In 1995, Pope John Paul, the second, released a list of films that the Vatican found important and valuable.

The list was to commemorate the 100th anniversary of cinema.

Nosferatu was on that list.

Building on that list.

No smoking gun in the to know it's not a movie.

You know is going to be on that list.

Ought to be around here somewhere.

I know that not every city on the entire building who said that?

Yes, he did say that to us.

And that nice young man we met down in the basement.

Oh, no.

Yes.

In this direction.

And what is happening?

Flights of stairs.

Oh, there you are.

Good Lord.

What happened to him?

Who are.

You people?

And how did you get in here?

Boss, I really got to tell you something.

I really got to tell you something.

Do you know what these people?

Yes.

This is my mom and my dad.

Mom and Dad.

The big guy in the red suit is the Baron and that handsome young fellow next to him is Mittens.

And just what.

What are they doing here?

I kind of sent him a letter earlier when I went to the post office, and I told him that if they were in the neighborhood to stop by.

Why would you do that?

You know how I feel about visitors.

I never told them what neighborhood I lived in.

I never thought they'd actually show up in person.

They never visited me when I was in reform school or the asylum or they never visited me anywhere.

So why would you show up here?

You know what?

That comes from this side of the family.

That's now my family doesn't smell like that.

I guess he still wasn't bathing.

Well, he's probably too busy to bathe or eat, right?

Or exercise.

He's a busy man.

He runs several major operations.

What?

And what are they talking about?

What operations do you run?

#*Sapo muttering#* I don't want to tell you how to run this place, but I was watching some of this movie.

So was I, Eugene.

Your name is Eugene?

Did you hear that Mittens?

His name is Eugene.

This is the station you watch.

Not now.

We'll talk later.

We'll talk later, Mom.

We'll talk later, boss.

What does she mean, the station?

You know, I don't want to criticize your business, Sonny boy, but that movie, your boy here found your boy.

Who is he talking about?

Oh, boss, boss, boss.

Oh, this is the boy you work through.

You and finds all those movies.

Your manservant.

Excuse me.

I'm not his boy.

Sapo, what did you tell these people?

I kind of told them that you work for me.

And I told them that you.

You Mittens, my partner, my best friend, and that we started this studio.

What did you tell them about me?

I kind of told them I found you in a sideshow and gave you a job.

That's where I found you.

Eugene you should't let your underlings talk to you that way.

Underling?

Woman, are you insane?

That's why when you talk, I even sent you to Pearl's Posture Academy for nothing.

Oh, sonny boy.

Could you have your boy here fetch my bags and make me a picture of my props from old fashions.

It's been a long ride.

Bags?

Yes.

We plan on staying for a few months at least.

That should give us time to fix everything that's wrong with this place.

I'll give you a food allergies list so you can make sure to tailor our meals to suit our need.

This is not happening.

This is not happening.

This is not happening.

This is not happening.

Sapo Get rid of these people now, folks, while I deal with this, please enjoy some more of Nosferatu here on Nightmare Theater.

Just because I'm having a bad night doesn't mean that you have to.

Hello, and welcome back.

It's a great movie for you guys, but a bad night for me, huh?

Great movie.

The actors are terrible.

The music makes me envy the deaf.

What are you talking about?

All of this is great.

You really believe this is a great movie?

Yes, I think it is a great movie.

And I'll thank you not to interfere.

I can see where all Sapo gets it from now.

He's always interrupting and saying stupid things to Gene.

That man is really rude, lady.

I ain't even begun to be rude.

Eugene, defend your mother.

Well, he's right.

I do say a lot of stupid things.

Yes, you do.

Wait, you think he says stupid things to.

Oh, all the time.

You should have seen him more than he is.

Glad he really was a dimwitted boy.

Maybe I was wrong about you guys.

You lied all the time too.

I bet he continues to lie.

Oh, like you wouldn't believe.

Speaking of that.

Yeah, we realized was something pretty quickly.

Eugene, does this man really work for you?

Well, not in any official capacity, but he does in odd jobs.

You guys.

Look, I made it all up.

He doesn't work for me.

I work for him.

I know for him.

I knew it.

But I have.

You know, I don't work very hard.

Well, at least you're telling the truth there.

He's the laziest man I've ever met.

You don't have to tell me, Baron.

And I've never seen a lazier man.

By the way, Baron, I apologize for asking you to fetch my bags.

It's all water under the bridge now.

It was just to see how he would react and what he would do.

And we're not staying here.

We just stopped for a bathroom break.

We're on our way to Paris.

Y'all are going to Texas?

No.

Paris, France.

Our daughter, His sister's an international lawyer, and she's letting us borrow her own private jet.

International lawyer with a jet.

Wow.

We know what cylinder wasn't fire in your family.

I suppose.

Your birth.

His brother is an astronaut.

Amazing.

Yes, Brock, that's our other son's name.

He is on the International Space Station even as we speak.

In addition to being an astronaut, he built the station's computer.

Wow.

Sapo.

I always figured your parents were related long before they were married, and they were employed in the carnival industry in some capacity.

Turns out they're good people and great parents.

Well, two thirds of the time they were great.

I guess.

To be fair, we never had high hopes.

We should have seen the writing on the wall when he was the first child to be a volunteer.

Kindergarten.

I was framed.

I was framed.

Yeah.

Somebody stole all those cookies, Place them under your mat and then set up cookie stand.

I tried to sell them cookies back to the teacher.

Yeah, maybe more.

Maybe two people framed me.

Maybe it was a conspiracy.

Yeah, maybe.

You.

Jane, We're heading out now.

Yes.

We have to be at the airport in a few hours.

Oh, my daughter owns the plane.

It'll wait for us.

By the way, the jet seats six.

There's just me and Mom out here on the plane.

If you Americans would like to go to Paris with us, you're more than welcome.

I would love to go to Paris.

There just aren't enough seats this time.

Maybe next time.

I appreciate the offer.

I'd love to see Paris again, but I really am enjoying this movie.

Oh, gotcha, old boy.

But the offer is always there.

By the way, I was just playing early.

I like this movie.

It's a cinematic tour de force and the musical score is outstanding.

Well, thank you.

Well, we better be going, Baron Mittens.

Take care.

See you later, Eugene.

We'll send you a postcard from the Eiffel Tower.

Thank you, Mom.

I was talking to means goodbye.

Yo, I mean, suppose those people weren't bad at all.

One One daughter is a big shot lawyer.

One son is an astronaut.

And then there's you.

Yeah, well, you know what?

I might not have a fancy gear.

I might not live in outer space, but I have something those three fancy pants people will never have.

And what's that to good friends, huh?

Never let it be said that you don't have a great sense of humor, folks.

Let's get back to just a little bit more of Nosferatu here on Nightmare Theater.

My name is Dacre Stoker I'm the great-grand nephew of Bram Stoker Author of Dracula.

And I love watching Nightmare Theatre Hey, have you ever wanted to talk on AM radio?

Well, there was a product called Mister Microphone, and you would put plug in it and you could say, Hey, good luck and we'll be back to pick you up later.

It was a great product.

So basically you're saying it was a cheap way to pick up women?

Absolutely it was.

And it worked well.

It didn't work for me.

Nothing works.

For you.

That's true.

Well, here we are again.

Welcome back.

We're here in the when you think about this from a sub sub sub sub basement of the television studio with a mysterious curator from the Merrill Movie Museum.

And he's brought us another item to look at here today.

So take it away.

Curator.

What do we have today?

Did you draw this?

I did not draw this.

If I had this kind of talent, I would not be locked in this sub sub sub sub basement.

Oh, yes, you would.

This is.

This is a storyboard from the movie Blade two that was drawn by the legendary artist Mike Mignola, who is the creator of Hellboy and a legendary comic book artist and a legend in Hollywood as well.

I worked on this film with Gloria del Toro, and this this was this storyboard was done showing the sequence where Chupa is killed by the Reapers and Blade two.

Killed by the Reaper.

So again, this is hand-drawn artwork by a legendary artist.

That in and of itself would just be a piece that anybody would be excited to have.

But it's also a part of cinema history going into this great film by an Academy Award winning director.

Yeah.

So you can kind of go through and follow this.

Is this mapped out what ended up being a very, very short sequence in the film?

I think I think the actual camera time of the sequence is maybe 10 seconds, maybe, but you know, you have to kind of go through and plan each piece of that.

And that's often done through storyboarding or nowadays it's done through what they call pre visualization, where sometimes they will actually just animate stuff and use CGI animation to kind of pre script a part of the film where there's going to be a battle or an action scene or something like that.

But but even now, even with doing this, a lot of times it does start with storyboarding and storyboarding.

It really does tend to be a very early part of the filmmaking process.

And so storyboards have basically been around since film began.

I mean, it's something that they've always done.

It's kind of that, like you said, the pre gaming, the kind of, you know, guys like Alfred Hitchcock were notoriously he'd basically shot the movie before he ever made the movie because he did everything in storyboards.

And then it was just a perfunctory thing of running through it for him because he was such an intense planner.

There are some art directors who are less, you know, bound to the storyboards.

You know, a guy like, I guess we say, like Ken Russell or someone like that who's much more into improvi-improvization or, you know, the Christopher Guest movie, for instance, you know, where everything is improved.

But if it's if it's a a big time Hollywood production, they're going to have storyboards because they need to know what they're doing.

Especially something action oriented or a lot of animation in particular to a lot of a lot of directors.

There are directors that actually do their own storyboarding, and James Gunn is very famous for that.

He tends to draw his little fingers and kind of starts pre visualizing what he's going to shoot while he's writing the screenplay.

Yeah, in case of something like this items.

And there are a lot of times that comic book artists and you come in to do this.

There are studio artists that do this kind of thing too, but there's a lot of very famous comic book artists like Mike Mignola, who have Moonlight as storyboard artists and done a lot of great storyboarding work for for films and for animation.

Yeah, but this in particular, just Mike Mignola is such a giant artist for him to be doing something like this is pretty spectacular to begin with.

So you do all the storyboards are just.

I'm not sure if you did all the storyboards on this movie, but we're just very lucky to have this one.

Yeah, and it could be multiple artists working on storyboards.

It could be just one artist.

You know, oftentimes a production will just hire one guy to be their storyboard guy, and that's what they do for the, you know, in that pre-production period is make all of those storyboards and make them all, you know, so that again, they know what they're doing.

Once they get on set, they know exactly what's happening.

And a lot of times there's this beautiful art generated that the public is never, ever going to see.

If we if we weren't showing this on on the show, you know, nobody would probably have ever seen this beautiful Mike Mignola piece from again, from a legendary artist.

Yeah.

And this is just like a pen and ink, basically is what he's done here.

I mean, what kind of sketched over and done that?

Because it doesn't have to be super finished.

But obviously with a guy like Mignola, you're going to get something that's a little more finished than maybe somebody else would do because he is just such a great artist.

Sure.

And you can also see that, you know, this is done before they even start casting, right?

So this this this figure that he's drawing for Cuba looks nothing like the actor who ended up playing the character.

Right.

Who was a kind of a big, beefy blond dude.

Right?

Yeah.

This guy looks more like a like Rasputin.

Yeah.

I don't know if that looks like you supporting your like, he might have a brain in his head or something, you know.

Anyway.

Yeah.

So.

Well, again, we just want to thank you for bringing a piece like this to us.

And again, this is something that normally the public wouldn't get to see.

So we're very fortunate and very happy that we get to see it here.

So why don't we get back to the film here on Nightmare Theater?

I'd like to see the storyboards for this movie.

Hello and welcome back.

That's a good story so far, don't you think, Sapo?

I guess I really wasn't paying attention.

I'm still steamed over my parents.

Well, I thought they were wonderful people, but.

They're always throwing my sister and my brother up in my face.

Eugene, why can't you be more like Brock?

He uses soap and changes his socks.

Or Eugene or the boy.

They're talking down at your groom.

Why can't you be more like your sister?

The only ankle bracelet she wears old boy is platinum and diamond encrusted.

And it doesn't shock or beep or call the police when she leaves the room.

Well, to be fair, all those things are true, right?

Yeah, but no one likes knowing the truth.

Why would you lie and tell them you ran this place?

I just wanted.

Them to be proud of me for once.

Why do you care?

You're a grown man.

Who cares what they think of you?

I do.

Well, I guess I understand, but.

Well, not really.

I was an only child, and my parents worshiped the ground I walked on.

They hung to my every word.

But I can see, I guess, your need for parental approval.

What?

Quiet, boy.

I'm trying to make them feel good.

What did you say, boss?

What are you talking about?

Mittens was telling me how he came from a litter of 14 puppies.

Eight actually survived, and he was not his parents favorite.

He was the least favorite.

In fact, his dad chased him out of the pack twice.

Really?

I know.

I know.

Just go with it.

Pretend you were chased out of the park for a minute.

I'm trying to cheer this loser up.

Yeah.

So you had to run away.

Everyone has favorites from time to time.

It's just a part of life, Sapo.

Am I your favorite boss?

I'll say this.

You're definitely in the top three.

Well, that's good enough for me.

Look at it this way.

For the most part, Mittens are myself excluded.

We are all castoffs and misfits.

But, you know what?

We have each other.

You ought to take some comfort in that, Sapo.

But those are my parents.

Besides, I wouldn't worry about it too much.

You're never going to see those people again.

I'm never going to see my folks again.

No, they left a note.

It was said like, don't call us.

We'll call you.

That's a bit harsh.

Well, let them go.

Good riddance.

Maybe it's just the intoxicating impacts of this movie talking.

But who needs other people?

The three of us.

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

That guy down in the basement.

We'll get by.

This is a good movie, and we're lucky to be watching it together.

You know.

What?

You're right.

We've all got each other.

One for all and all for one.

All of us against the world, baby.

No, no.

We don't need to go that far.

You know, I probably still have some of those cookies I stole when I was in VP.

You all want some?

Oh, no.

I don't want to get near it.

125 year old Cookie.

But, hey, you want to know something neat about this movie.

My daddy likes?

Other than that, when this came out, some folks thought the lead actor, Max Schreck, really was a vampire.

Get out.

Most vampires from Lugosi Dracula to Christopher Lee's Dracula to just about any vampire you can name.

Even the start they were all portrayed is attractive, charming, even sexy and seductive.

Like the song says, there was Jonathan Harker and Lucy Strand's Elegant Count's Hypnotic glance.

The vampires are always elegant and refined.

Schreck's Vampire looked like a rabid bat, and he was downright frightening.

He just looked scary for those reasons, and many other folks thought he was the real deal.

Like the real deal.

Holyfield Real.

Real.

Like for real, Real.

See, Shrek wasn't a huge star, especially in America.

His performance was so scary, so unsettling that people thought they were witnessing a real vampire.

Shrek himself was a bit of a recluse.

He was rarely, if ever, seen in public, and he certainly wasn't a raving beauty.

He was an odd looking man.

It all contributed to the notion that maybe, just maybe, he really was a vampire.

Oh, and his last name roughly translates to terror.

People didn't really think he was a vampire.

Both people eat that gum.

Do I have to remind you of a certain manservant who was sure that bear in the fabric softener commercial was real?

Remember when you were afraid to fold towels because you thought the bear would get you?

I'm telling you, that bear is real.

And he's out there and he's just waiting in the linen closet.

There should be two pieces.

If you folks at home want to find out more about this movie, look for the magnificent film Shadow of the Vampire, which is all about the making of the movie you were watching tonight.

Seek it out.

You won't regret it, folks.

Let's get back to the conclusion of Nosferatu, a film so unsettling many people thought they were really looking at a real vampire here on Nightmare theater.

Hello and welcome back.

So the Sunlight killed Orlok Sapo, did you know this was the first film to show some sunlight killing a vampire?

I don't like going out in the daylight myself, but just to be safe.

I don't blame you again.

This film spawned several of the popular vampire myths and legends of vampire must travel with a coffin full of dirt he was buried under.

But more specifically, this is where the notion of sunlight killing the vampire comes from.

Basically, it boils down to this Orlok is pure evil.

The only way to kill him is with pure goodness.

The rising sun, on some level represents the renewal of the day and the resurrection of the day from the night.

Pure good trumps evil.

See, you learn something today.

I sure did.

In fact, I learned a lot of things tonight, boss.

Well, let me ask you, what would you say is the most valuable lesson you learned tonight?

Don't let my folks know where I live.

Don't write letters or something like that.

No, Sapo the lesson here is be yourself.

Don't compare yourself to other family members.

Just be the best person you can be.

Now, I grant, that's nothing to write home about.

I'm not writing home any more at all.

But each day is a new day and a new way to start over.

Look, you're never going to be an attorney or an astronaut or even a high school graduate.

I almost got the G.E.D..

Almost.

But each day you can try just a bit harder than the day before, right?

Yes, right, right, right, right, right.

So Sapo, what do we have on tap for next week?

We have this boss.

Oh, dear.

Mittens, call Sapo's dad, maybe we can still make that flight to Paris.

Folks, we've had a good night with a great movie, but all good things must come to an end.

So until next week, may all your dreams be nightmares.