One Question with Becky Ferguson
One Question with Becky Ferguson
Season 2022 Episode 3 | 28m 29sVideo has Closed Captions
The business life can be tough. How can we make our lives easier? Chris Westfall answers.
The business life can be tough. Deadlines. Relationships. Expectations. Conflict. Challenges are everywhere. So says Author, Speaker, and business coach Chris Westfall. When it looks like life, career, communication, and everything else is breaking down, it’s time to break free, he says. How can we make our lives easier? Chris Westfall has answers on this special episode of One Question.
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One Question with Becky Ferguson is a local public television program presented by Basin PBS
One Question with Becky Ferguson
One Question with Becky Ferguson
Season 2022 Episode 3 | 28m 29sVideo has Closed Captions
The business life can be tough. Deadlines. Relationships. Expectations. Conflict. Challenges are everywhere. So says Author, Speaker, and business coach Chris Westfall. When it looks like life, career, communication, and everything else is breaking down, it’s time to break free, he says. How can we make our lives easier? Chris Westfall has answers on this special episode of One Question.
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Learn Moreabout PBS online sponsorship- "The business life can be tough.
Deadlines, relationships, expectations, conflict, challenges are everywhere," so it says author, speaker, and business coach Chris Westfall.
"When it looks like life, career, communication, and everything else is breaking down, it's time to break free," he says.
How can we make our lives easier?
Chris Westfall has answers.
I'm Becky Ferguson, and this is One Question.
(bright dramatic music) Live life like a lazy Sunday afternoon.
If being hard on yourself were going to work, it would've worked by now.
Compassion always makes things easier.
Be a resource.
Life is service.
Success is always available.
When we eliminate two words, success gets closer.
Those two words, by now.
Those are just a few of the 60 ways Chris Westfall counsels you can make your work life work for you.
He doesn't promise easy, but he points to an easier way.
Westfall is a business coach, keynote speaker, consultant and author who has helped launch over 60 businesses raising over $100 million in capital investment.
He has appeared on ABC news, NBC TV, and CNN.
A regular contributor to Forbes, he has worked with thousands of leaders at Fortune 500 companies, nonprofit organizations, and high tech startups.
Recognized as the US National Elevator Pitch champion, Westfall is publisher of seven books.
The most recent of which is titled "Easier."
Westfall recently traveled to Midland for a One Question interview.
Chris Westfall, thank you so much for coming to Midland to visit with us.
We're just delighted that you're here.
And we're also happy that you're gonna teach us how to make life easier with this book that you have just published.
And I think there would be a lot of people who say that life isn't particularly easy.
So why did you write a book and call it "Easier"?
- Well, I don't think that life is easy.
I don't think so at all.
In fact, life can be pretty difficult.
But the reason I called the book "Easier" is because of something that I discovered.
And that is that even in the midst of very difficult circumstances, things can always be easier.
Maybe not easy.
Like working for an oil company, that's not easy, but there's a way to go about that that is easier.
And when you understand an easier way of doing things, you can show up differently in your relationships, in your career, in your work.
And that's really at the heart and soul of the story.
It's not a book about how life can be easy.
That's a bridge too far, right?
It just feels like it's too much, but we can always show up in a way that makes things.
And when I say things, I mean everything.
Easier.
- But your book, I think is, you're talking to someone about business.
And so this is not a very typical business book.
Business books are usually, you know, how do you have power.
You know, how do you get along with other people.
This is a narrative.
This is a story.
Tell me why you decided to take that approach.
- Well, I originally set out to write a book that was gonna be a hundred ways to make your work life work.
So I was gonna sit down and write this book, which felt like writing the 10 commandments 10 times or something like that.
And it felt like scolding.
It felt like...
It just didn't feel natural.
It didn't feel authentic.
And I really wrestled with it and I thought, "How can I convey these ideas and make it authentic and make it fresh?"
Well, if it's gonna be fresh and authentic, it's gotta come, it's gotta come from a narrative.
It's gotta come from a story.
And so that's one unfolds inside of "Easier" is it's a dialogue.
It's a conversation between a coach and a client.
So the client is frustrated with his job.
He wants to find out if there's something more.
And so from this place of frustration, he's seeking transformation.
So he hires the coach to help him find him.
- He hires the coach.
And as I recall, the first thing the coach says is, "Make it like a Sunday afternoon.
Make it easy like a Sunday afternoon.
What does that mean?
- Well, what the coach says is, can you live life like a lazy Sunday afternoon.
- Lazy Sunday afternoon, okay.
- And the idea behind a lazy Sunday afternoon, if you think about it, on a lazy Sunday afternoon, you're only doing what you wanna do.
Whether you're watching Netflix or you're making a sandwich or you're taking a hike or you're going out on the boat or whatever it is that you do on a Sunday afternoon.
When you're having lazy Sunday afternoon, you are actively lazy.
In other words, you're doing what you want to do no matter what it might be.
And from that place of freedom, from that place of real engagement, because on a Sunday afternoon, I mean, like if I'm taking a walk with my wife or if I'm talking to my kids, I mean, I'm really engaged.
And so when you live life like a lazy Sunday afternoon, it's not really about being lazy.
It's about being what I describe in the book is actively lazy.
In other words, working in the pursuit of exactly what it is that you want to do and then doing it full out.
And when you understand how to live life like a lazy Sunday afternoon, you can take that perspective into work that doesn't make you lazy at work.
It makes you show up and play full out with a level of engagement that typically we only reserve for our weekends, but you can bring that to bear in your work life and in your relationships when you understand how to live life like a lazy Sunday afternoon.
- Now you're a business coach and you're also a speaker, and of course, you're an author.
Tell me a little bit about yourself and how you got to be interested in doing this sort of thing.
- Well, for many years, I was a corporate guy.
I worked in Fortune 100 companies and I discovered something about myself.
Actually, other people discovered something about me.
I didn't discover it 'cause they kept telling me that I needed to get up on stage and give a speech.
And I thought, "You don't understand.
I'm a product manager.
I'm a sales guy.
I don't understand why you're asking me to stand up and tell stories."
And when I was in the corporate world, there were people that I worked with, people that saw things inside of me that I couldn't see for myself.
And I came to realize that, my passion for storytelling and helping others to tell their story, which really is at the base of my coaching work, is something that I cared about very, very deeply.
And when I launched my own business a little over 10 years ago, as a speaker and as a writer, I really stepped into this idea of storytelling and helping people to communicate in a more powerful way.
And that's what led me to coaching clients that ended up on television shows like Shark Tank and Dragons' Den, which that's what they call Shark Tank in Canada.
Even Shark Tank Australia.
- Wow.
- So helping people to tell their stories has been something that has just been a passion of mine.
And it was something that was a part of my corporate life.
And then when I became an entrepreneur and went into business for myself, I realized that what others had seen inside of me, what was a real passion for me, wasn't just a passion.
It was a profession.
And I realized that work could be play.
And I realized how to live life like a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Yeah, because I tell you, I don't feel like I work in my life.
I really don't.
- Well, I'm wondering in your book, you have a client and you have a coach, and I'm wondering which one are you.
- Both?
- I thought maybe that was the case.
So this client is very frustrated with his job, is thinking about quitting his job, turns out he gets fired instead.
Is that you?
- It's been a part of me.
It's been a part of me.
It's been something that I've observed.
It's been something that I've experienced.
And it's also been something, unfortunately, that I've had to share with others.
I had to be the guy who fired people.
And going through that experience myself from both sides of the desk gave me an insight into it that hopefully is conveyed with some compassion and some care in the book.
But yeah, it's a story between a client and a coach, but there are pieces of me inside of the coach, inside of the client.
And yet there are parts and pieces that are something different, something that's part of the book that showed up in that creative process of the narrative.
And it's really interesting the way that I wrote this book.
I completely changed 'cause I've sit down and I was gonna write basically a hundred blog posts, basically.
And when I just canned that idea, I just stepped away from that completely.
And I said I'm gonna write the book that wants to come through me.
What would that story be?
What could it be?
And from this place, when I said it, it can be a narrative.
It can be a fable.
I found this incredible amount of freedom.
And I found that I could write actually the most authentic work that I've ever written.
And that probably sounds strange 'cause it's fiction.
But from this fable, I could craft things that...
I just don't know.
Things that I wanted to share and I couldn't find an outlet for them until this book.
- Well, fables are a well worn way of telling stories.
What if people are in a difficult work environment or they're facing some changes in their businesses or there's some disappointments.
What are some ideas to make things easier?
- Well, I'll start with one of the things that makes things difficult and then work backwards from there.
- Let's do that, yeah.
- Because here's the thing.
Here's what makes things difficult when you believe that it's all up to you.
If you believe this lie, and it is a lie, And the lie is this.
If it's got to be, it's up to me.
- Okay.
- Let me tell you why that's a lie, because nothing of any value happens without the involvement of other people.
And when you recognize that you are not alone, things get easier.
And when you see that you don't have to go it alone, that you don't have to lift the world, that you aren't Atlas shrugging with the world on your shoulders, that there are people around that want to help you, that there are coaches, there are counselors, there are mentors, there are so many people that are engaged in wanting to help, you see that you're not alone.
And when you recognize that, things get easier.
And that would be the first place that I would start, is if you're in a difficult patch, whatever that patch might look like, who around you can be of service and how can you be of service to others?
Because sometimes, from a place of frustration, when we take our attention off of ourselves, new things show up and that's a big part of the book as well.
- Well, that's one of your 60 ways, is to be of service to other people.
In this story, the coach loses his father.
Is that your story?
- Sadly, it is.
Unfortunately, yes.
And the book is dedicated to my father and to his memory.
Yeah, I lost him to COVID.
And it was in the days before, you know, before vaccines, before mask mandates and all those kinds of things.
Unfortunate circumstances, unfortunate circumstances.
But, yeah.
And I wanted to capture what I went through because from this place of loss, and I mean, during the pandemic, we've all had things taken away from us.
We've all had things taken from us.
But my experience, I guess, it wasn't unique.
A lot of people lost others that they cared about.
But I wanted to share how my journey, my journey which was going from, how am I gonna get through this, the loss of my father, as I would sit at a traffic light and just be weeping.
You know, just uncontrollably.
And I'm like, you know, "Get it together, get it together."
"How can I cope with this?"
was what I was asking myself.
How can I get through this?
And what I came to realize was, I didn't wanna get through it.
In fact, 'cause getting through it would mean somehow giving up on the sadness and the grief and the feelings that I had.
And let me just say it this way, the feelings that I have for my father.
And I mean, they're right here.
I mean, they're sitting next to me.
And I carry his memory with me wherever I go.
The way that I could honor my father was by sharing this story.
And when I shifted from how am I gonna get through this to what can I get from this, that's where the book came from.
And so this book is truly a labor of love.
And it's a story, not about someone who lost his father.
It's a story about hope and encouragement, and for anyone who's listening to us talk today, who's experienced a loss of any kind, this book makes it easier because, 'cause I know, because I've lived it.
- Your book to me is very philosophical.
It's very unbusinesslike because you talk about what can I get from this.
You talk about don't do, shoulds.
You talk about, having a sort of a positive paradigm.
Are you a philosopher or a business coach?
- That's a great question.
I'm going to say, well, you said business coach in my introduction, but you know what I'm gonna say?
I'm a philosopher.
- Okay, I think you are.
- I'm a philosopher, I think.
And here's why I'm gonna say that.
Because when you go into a business coaching conversation, people are looking for tips and techniques and tricks.
How do I get this done?
And so you give 10 tips.
And they remember six of them.
They try three of them.
Two of them don't work and then they go, "Hmm, you're not a very good coach."
The reason that tips and techniques are not the heart and soul of this book, that it is a narrative and that it's something that looks in the nature, in the direction of philosophy.
I don't know if I'm philosopher or not.
I really don't.
But it looks at the nature of our human nature.
Because where does transformation come from?
Where does real change come from?
Does it come from some guru that's out there?
Does it come from some book?
Or does it come from the insights that we see inside?
And for me, when I am lost in a story, I find myself and I find what I've been missing.
And that's the intention behind the book.
So I don't know if I'm a philosopher or a business coach.
I'm just someone who wants to help and who's written a book that's trying to help people to heal, and quite frankly, to help me to heal a little bit along the way.
- Well, it seems to me you're telling people to be a little kinder to themselves.
And you talk about how we should never say by now.
By now I should be this or by now I should have done this.
Why is that important?
- Well, if being hard on yourself were going to work, it would've worked by now.
- By now.
- The two words that keep us away from seeing the success that is ours right now.
Other words, by now.
I should be a vice president by now.
I should have that foreign car by now.
I should have a better address by now.
When we take away the obligation of time, what we see is that success isn't something that's out there, it's not something that's on the calendar.
It's something that we can access right now.
And in fact, if we're gonna create change for ourselves, we have to see where we are today and be okay with that.
And when you get to a place where you give yourself permission to be who you are, to be who you are and to be okay with that, that's the place where real change can come from and you understand that success isn't some external.
It's not a number in your bank account or a street address or a title on a business card.
Success is something that we find inside.
And that's the perspective of the book, is it's really looking at life from the inside out so that you can find things and so that you can find success and you don't have to wait for it because it's here right now if you shift your perspective to see it.
- Yeah, you're defining success internally instead of externally.
- Correct, yes.
- Philosopher.
You talked about resilience and adaptability and you say those are available to anyone anytime.
Say more about that.
- Adaptability is built into our DNA and this is something that I learned from a guy who I interviewed for Forbes, a gentleman by the name of David Eagleman.
And he had a show on PBS called "The Brain" that ran for a number of years.
And he wrote a book that actually is one of the most inspiring things that I've ever read and it's called "Livewired."
And "Livewired" is a book, it's all about neuroscience.
And it's crazy to say that this is an inspiring book, but it's all about the way that our brains work.
And here's what David Eagleman says, and this blew my mind, here's what he says, "When scientists discovered the human DNA, the human genome, they were amazed that it was not more sophisticated and complex.
And the reason is, for our DNA being incomplete, is because we are shaped by our surroundings.
We are not hardwired like a giraffe or a donkey or a lizard.
We are livewired to adapt to our circumstances and to take in situations and learn from them.
And so when we understand that adaptability isn't, again, something that's out there, it's something that's inside.
We are wired for change.
And in "Livewired," he talks about people who have lost something.
And I'm talking about lost the sense of sight.
They've lost their hearing.
Some of them have lost limbs.
And when that happens, our brains are livewired to rewire.
- To adapt.
- To adapt, that's right.
And that adaptation happens without effort, without stress, without strain.
It is part of our DNA and part of the way that our brains are created.
And so, for me, I found this incredibly comforting and inspiring to know that while we sit there and we say things like, "Oh, change is hard and stuff like that, what's really true is that coping with change or preparing for change, that's what's hard.
But change is something that we, as human beings, are livewired, livewired to do, to adapt to, yes.
So that adaptability, I find, makes things easier.
- Well, it's encouraging.
Now you start most of your chapters, if not all of your chapters, with quotes from famous individuals and my favorite one, I think you put it in here twice, is Arthur Ash and his is, "Start where you are.
Do what you can.
Never give up."
Why did you have this in here twice?
Not just once, but twice.
- 'Cause that's what my mother used to always say to me.
When it comes to coaching, which if you think about it, coaching at its core is about service and being of service to others, that service doesn't come from an agenda or a curriculum.
It comes from meeting people where they are.
It comes from a place that says, "I see you."
It comes from a place that says, "I hear you.
I'm listening."
So many times in my coaching, my work, I don't come into the conversation saying, "You know, let's start at chapter one or let's start at chapter four."
Sometimes I throw out the book and I start where the client is, right?
And I think that's what people want now more than ever.
They want to be seen.
They want to be heard.
They wanna be appreciated for who they are, how they are, and where they are.
And when you come into the conversation and all of those things are okay with me, it makes everything easier.
- You keep coming back to that.
Here's another one I like.
"When life takes away something of greater value, something of greater value is always given in return."
And that's Michael J.
Fox.
- Indeed.
- And it matters who says these things sometimes.
- It does.
- Why did you choose that?
- Have you ever had an experience in your life where something has been taken away and it's been replaced?
I know you're interviewing me, but I can't help but wonder because I have.
- Sure.
- I have.
And back to the story of the loss of my father, here's this book.
Here's this conversation.
Here are the dialogues that are coming from that.
And so from sadness comes joy, comes change, comes transformation, comes inspiration even if we allow it.
And when I made my grief okay, when I got okay with that, it turned his memory into a blessing for me and for everyone that I speak to.
And that's not to say that I still don't have sadness, that I still don't have, that it doesn't make it go away, but I don't want it to go away 'cause that would mean I have to-- - Why would you?
- I'd have to erase the past.
I'd have to erase the love and the relationship that we shared, and I'd never do that.
So I think that when things are taken away, it's so easy to get indignant or to get angry or to say why is this being taken from me.
What happens when we stop and ask this question?
What's good about this?
What's good about this?
And sometimes that might be a bridge too far especially if you're in the midst of a difficult circumstance, I totally understand.
But one of the things that the book talks about is some ideas on how to zoom out, how to zoom out on a difficult situation and find some choices, find some flexibility, because if you're locked into a situation and you're thinking there's only one way that this can work.
Well, that-- - Back up a little bit.
- Yeah, look it-- - Back up a little.
- 'Cause possibilities always exist.
And if you think about that, how many possibilities exist in any given moment?
The answer is endless.
But when we get lost in thought, what does it look like?
Like we're heading to the crowd and there's only one way that's right.
And I've been there, too.
But that's part of why I wrote the book is to help people pull back and to see that possibilities always exist.
And when you see those possibilities, and that's not to say that every possibility is worth pursuing, but when you see that possibilities exist, you find some freedom.
You find some flexibility.
It's like an athlete.
In any sport you wanna choose, an athlete comes to the coach and says, "Coach, there's only one way to win this game."
The coach would say, "Sit down.
Your job is to find every way, every possible way."
And that means you've got to be in a place where you're able to zoom out and see the possibilities.
- Well, you talk about finding what's good.
This is the opposite.
"Today, having power means knowing what to ignore."
That seems like a big one to me.
Talk more about that.
- Well, the front part of that quote is that in the old days, knowledge was power.
But today, having power means knowing what to ignore.
And the reason that that is true is because there's too much information.
There's too many things bombarding us.
And one of the things that I've discovered is that where you put your attention is where you find your results.
And so what you spend time with, you're going to duplicate.
You're going to replicate.
You're going to increase in your life.
And so we have to think about, where we're putting our attention and knowing what to ignore is absolutely vital in the pursuit of a life that's easier.
And the way that I say it, I think I say this in the book, is that just because a train of thought shows up, it doesn't mean you have to ride that train.
We've got a lot of thoughts and a lot of thinking and a lot of information and a lot of media that's bombarding us at all times.
How do we choose where we put our attention?
And sometimes, the best way to make life easier is making some choices about what to ignore.
Because on the backside of that is making a choice about what you can say yes to.
- What you can pay attention to.
Anything you'd like to add, Chris?
- Other than just saying that it's been an absolute pleasure talking with you and thank you for having me on the show.
I can't think of anything else, but it's just terrific.
And thank you very much for having me.
- Well, I enjoyed reading the book and I enjoyed having you today.
Thank you so much for coming.
Chris Westfall ends his book "Easier" with a Martin Luther King quote, "We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope."
We will conclude tonight's One Question as we always have with a look at a work of art.
Our painting is an oil on canvas with Irene Rice Pereira called Primordial Blaze of the Absolute.
She was an American abstract artist, poet, and philosopher who played a major role in the development of modernism in the United States.
She is known for her work in the genres of geometric abstraction, abstract expressionism, and lyrical abstraction.
Pereira was born Irene Rice in 1902 in Chelsea, Massachusetts.
She painted throughout her life.
Her paintings first gained recognition in the early 1930s when she exhibited at the Whitney in New York city.
With the showcase there, she became one of the first women along with Georgia O'Keeffe to be given a retrospective at a major New York museum.
During the latter part of her career, she rejected abstract expressionism and experienced difficulties with gallery owners and museum directors.
She believed that art and literature were being swallowed up in a chaotic void of mindlessness.
Eventually, she left New York permanently and moved to Spain.
She died of emphysema in 1971.
Her work is exhibited at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York, the Smithsonian American Art Museum in Washington, and the Whitney Museum of American Art in New York.
This painting can be seen at Baker Schorr Fine Art in Midland.
Finally, thank you for joining us for this edition of One Question.
We will be back periodically with special interviews of interest.
I'm Becky Ferguson, goodnight.
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