(mellow music) ♪ (splat) ♪ (Ben) Check this out.

♪ (Melissa) Our dog used to do that.

(Ben) Hey, Carbo!

-Carbo!

-What?

Is she here already?

(Ben) Mate, you need to chill.

She doesn't get here till tomorrow night.

Ugh.

Good.

Right.

Well, okay, off to bed.

Come on, chop chop!

(Ben) It's 8:30.

Yeah, we've got the whole place to tidy.

Early start for all of us.

(Melissa) You know, why don't we just clean up now?

I'm knackered!

(Ben) Me and Carbo, we've been best mates since we were four.

Sure, he's got his faults... (stumbling) ...like not watching where he's going.

Carbo never sees things coming.

♪ (girls, in unison) Hey, Carbo!

(Ben) Carbo, watch the play!

(thunk) (whistle blowing, cheering) Right out of left of field.

And I'm the one who's always had to be there for him.

-You okay?

-Carbo!

(chanting) -Thanks, buddy.

-No worries.

To pick him up and dust him off.

(Carbo, amid clatter) Ouch!

(Ben) Most of the time.

♪ Karadonis picks off one, picks off two, oh yeah!

Oh!

I wouldn't let Carbo see you doing that.

-I'm just checking the-- -What are you doing?

-Told ya!

-I thought you were meant -to be cleaning up.

-Yeah, I'm checking her arrival.

You should always check in case the plane's running late.

Oh yeah.

I was just about to do that.

So who is this girl, anyway, the Queen of Lesbos?

(Carbo) She's just a nice chick, okay?

First time off the island.

Mom'll kill me if I don't treat her right.

Everything has to be perfect.

So while she's here, no walking around in your undies.

We gotta hide the X-rated DVDs, the gangsta rap, and the mega-violent video games.

-Carbo, they're all yours.

-And I want them outta my sight.

(Melissa) So is Artemis your second or third cousin?

(Carbo) Not all Greeks are related.

She's my mom's best friend's daughter.

(Ben) It's his cousin.

Ah!

So this is a setup.

(Carbo) What?

Matchmaking, best friends setting up their kids.

I know how that works, trust me.

(Carbo) No, no, she's like a sister, okay?

-She's just a baby.

-Babies grow up.

(Ben) So, uh, do you reckon she's got a moustache?

Hey, that is such a dumb stereotype.

(Carbo) I wish it was.

(Melissa) Carbo, are you sure about that flight number?

-Yeah, why?

-Well, according to this, the plane landed an hour ago.

-Mom'll kill me.

-What, from the other side of the world?

(Carbo) You haven't met my mother, have you?

Fair call.

Carbo's dead.

(Carbo) She's only a little girl all alone in a big country.

She'll be freaking out, she won't know what to do!

-Nicolakimu!

-Nico-what?

(Carbo) It's a nickname.

(Melissa) So much for freaking out.

(Ben) Five bucks on the moustache.

(female singer) ♪ Turn on the sun ♪ ♪ Turn on the sun ♪ ♪ Light up the world, come, everyone ♪ ♪ Turn off the wind, the thunder and the rain ♪ ♪ Turn on the sun-like smile again ♪ (needle ripping on record) -Nicolakimu!

-Artie!

It is so good to see you!

I have missed you.

(Carbo) You--you're so big.

I mean, you're not six!

And you are not 12.

(Ben) And as if grown-up Artemis wasn't enough of a shock... -Nico!

-Mom!

My baby!

Surprise!

(kissing noises) (Melissa) Hi!

How you doing?

(door opens) (laughter, exclamation) -Ohh... -Morning!

(Nathan) Morning, Granddad.

Mom and Dad are "sleeping in" again.

(Ted) Hm.

Why do you think I've got the radio on?

(Julie moans) I think I might join Rachel outside.

-You coming?

-I wish.

I promised Sammy I'd make breakfast.

So grab her a banana.

(Ben) Morning.

Mom around?

-Uh, they're sleeping in.

-Oh.

-You don't wanna go in there.

-Why?

-Ohh!

-Ben!

(Ben exclaims) (mellow music from radio) ♪ Told ya.

(Ben) I'm just gonna go and wash my eyes out with acid.

Hm.

Uh, but when... when Mom's-- -Awake?

-Yeah, can you just tell her everyone's invited to a barbecue tomorrow?

Carbo's mom's best friend's daughter's cousin's sister's whatever's arrived.

-Rita too.

-Rita.

Yeah, she just turned up.

Gave Carbo the wrong arrival time.

Wanted to surprise him.

(Carbo) So a dab of vegemite and lamingtons.

What else is typically Australian?

-Roast lamb.

-Greek.

-Seafood platter.

-Greek.

What is it with this country?

There's no original food.

-Kangaroos.

-Kangaroo steaks!

Ten points, Ben-o.

(Ben) Mate, you need to chill out.

So you weren't there to pick them up.

-She gave you the wrong time.

-Yeah, but we didn't clean the house.

She's up there right now doing this and this and this.

You remember that list she left us?

She's come back to see if we stuck to it.

As if we stuck to it.

-Nico!

-Down here, Mom!

We're having a barbecue, you know, just us and the Rafters, to welcome Artie.

You know, all-Australian kangaroo steaks.

(Artie) You eat kangaroos?

(Carbo) How was the shower, Artie?

-Nice and hot?

-It was perfect, thank you.

-Mom?

-Fine, fine.

I'm just glad I pulled off my little surprise.

You know why I did it, don't you?

-No.

-Why do you think?

I don't know.

-You know.

-Do I?

(Rita) Oh, silly boy!

Because I missed my baby!

Oh!

And when I saw Artemis packing, it made me miss him even more, so I said, "Theo, why don't I surprise him?"

Mwah!

Now.

Why don't I make us all some coffee?

Hm?

(playful music) I'm sorry!

I didn't want her to come!

She drove me crazy on the plane.

That's okay, she's not here for long.

One day is too long.

We have to get rid of her.

How'm I ever supposed to have fun and meet boys -with her here?

-Nah.

He never sees it coming.

(shouting, thunk) What?

I'm not six anymore.

(Artie laughs) -Phew.

-Ahh.

You know, I've been thinking.

(Julie) About poor Ben?

He's gonna be traumatized for life.

(Dave) Serves him right, 24 years old and hasn't learned how to knock yet.

No, I've been thinking about, um... having the snip.

-What, as in the-- -Yeah, yeah.

Snip, snip.

(Julie exclaims) -Um... -And sooner rather than later.

(Julie) Uh, excuse me.

A woman in second trimester; I think it's a bit late for preventative measures.

(Dave) Yeah, I'm just thinking ahead.

I know the chances of you getting pregnant again -are slim.

-Well, I'd be up for some kind of fertility award.

(Dave) I just think it's my turn to take responsibility, you know?

-Oh.

-Lightning can strike twice.

(Julie) Darling, that's very thoughtful of you, but let's face it.

Once this baby's born, we won't be having sex for at least, oh, 18 years?

-Sad but true.

-Mm.

And what's the rush?

I haven't finished with you yet.

(Dave) Mm.

You're a shameless woman, you know that?

-Shameless.

-Mm.

(door opens) Sammy.

-Sam!

-Oh!

(Nathan) It's safe to come out.

Sleep-in time is over.

Hm.

How's your assignment going?

(Sammy) I don't know where to start.

(Nathan) "Explore the impact of the current economic climate on two professionals in contrasting fields and their responses to it."

What's the problem?

(Sammy) I don't want to screw up the assignment by interviewing the wrong people.

-I'll take that.

-Thanks.

(Nathan) What about Owen?

-Owen.

-Yeah!

Well, you must have thought of him.

(Sammy exclaims) (Sammy) I did, but...you hate Owen.

(Nathan) I don't hate Owen, and he would be perfect to talk to.

What have you done?

What do you mean?

(Sammy) Why are you being so helpful?

Because you're my wife and I want you to do well.

And...you sure you wouldn't mind me seeing him?

(Nathan) Oh, the guy that you were in love with before you met me, the guy that's never really gotten over you.

-What's the problem?

-Stop it.

(Nathan) It's just, the way you've handled my screw-ups lately, Sam, I'm just returning the favor.

Okay?

So call him.

(Sammy) Thank you so much for doing this.

(Owen) Hey, my pleasure.

I'm just glad you called.

(Sammy laughs) (Sammy) Okay, so my approach to this article is going to be personal.

Relaxed.

I don't want it to be too dry or analytical.

-Okay.

-So how's Nathan?

He's fantastic.

Um, he just started an amazing job in the music industry, actually.

(Owen) Music now, is it?

I thought he was all about real estate-- (Sammy) Oh, well, it's all sales.

I mean, he'd be successful either way.

(Owen) Mm.

Right.

Um, (clears throat), you were away for a couple of years.

-Mm-hm.

-What's changed since you got back from London?

Uh, well, professionally, things aren't great, obviously.

-Mm-hm.

-Socially, I'm still single.

(recorder clicks off) -What are you doing?

-You said to make it personal.

Uh, your personal take on the global recession, not your love life.

I'm sorry, I thought... fine.

Uh, the way I see it is we live in a culture of instant gratification.

-In what sense?

-Well, we all want short-term gains.

No one looks at the bigger picture.

But there's nothing like an economic crisis to make you reassess your priorities.

And I've realized that a bad choice made today comes back to bite you tomorrow.

(Sammy) Owen, can you please just stick to economics?

-I was.

-You weren't, you were-- What?

(mellow music) (traditional Greek music) (Artie) Where is all your good music?

(Carbo) Well, there's some great CDs there.

-Nana Mouskouri.

-Yeah, that was left over from Mom's last visit.

♪ (turns off sound system) Okay.

Rule one.

I know you've got Mom conned, but there's-- -Conned?

-You know, tricked, fooled.

And I'm not going to take the blame when she finds out you're not as sweet and innocent as she thinks.

-I am innocent.

-Good!

Keep it that way.

-Oh!

Hi, Nick.

-How's it going, Mrs. Rafter?

-This is Artie.

-Oh!

Hi, Artie.

Welcome to Sydney.

(Carbo) Are you coming to barbie tomorrow?

(Julie) I wouldn't miss it.

Is your mom in?

-Unfortunately.

-Sorry?

Uh--she's sleeping!

(Carbo) Yeah, jetlag, but she was talking about going over to see you later.

Oh, good, look forward to it.

-Hi, darling!

-Hi.

Nathan gave me your message.

(Ben) Good, great.

So you finally got yourself out of bed, then?

(Julie) Ooh!

-You all right, Mrs. Rafter?

-Oh!

-Mom!

-Yeah, no, I just...

I just feel a bit lightheaded, that's all.

-Like you're gonna faint?

-No!

Oh, no, no, probably-- I haven't had breakfast, I'm fine.

(Ben) If anyone should feel faint, it's me, after what I almost saw this morning.

(Julie) Would you like me to hang a sock on the doorknob -next time?

-Oh, gross!

(Julie) Well, I'd better let you get on.

-Are you off to the beach?

-Yes, Bondi!

(Julie) Oh!

Well, great surf, fish and chips.

-Hot lifesavers.

-Okay!

In the car.

(Julie) Okay, well, enjoy.

-I'll see you at the barbie.

-See you, Mrs. Rafter.

Okay, you got everything there?

-Towel, sunscreen?

-Yes, Nico.

(Carbo) Good, good.

Seatbelt on.

Okay, gently.

(Ben) Anyone but Carbo could see Artie was up to something.

But what she planned for the beach, that definitely came from left of field.

(playful music) (Chrissey) Do you have any idea how lucky you are?

-Yes, I do.

-I mean, how many guys even think about taking responsibility for birth control?

-I know.

-And especially with so much on his plate.

I mean, what with his mother back in his life -and the business.

-I know, I know.

I'm just, you know, I'm just a bit curious about his timing, that's all.

(Chrissey) Julie, why can't you just accept the fact that you're married to a gorgeous, loving husband who is offering to have a vase-- Anyway, so when I saw Rita this morning, I practically had to do a commando roll to avoid her seeing me.

♪ (Julie) Hi, darling.

(Chrissey) How'd the Walsh job go?

Lemme guess.

(Julie) Oh, sorry.

We're girlfriends, and, you know... -Girlfriends talk.

-Yeah.

I'm your boss, Chrissey, it's a bit-- (Chrissey) Look at it this way, Dave.

I mean, at least you don't have to make up a story about when you, uh, you know, go and get it done.

(Julie laughs) Oh, that's mean.

I'd better get out of here before the dragon wakes.

Dragon?

Rita, the ex-girlfriend eater.

-See you, boo.

-Goodbye!

Oh, what?

Be proud!

(Julie coos, laughs) Traditional Aussie cuisine.

How do you like it?

(Artie) We do have decent potatoes on Lesbos.

(Ben) Oh yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to-- I'm teasing you!

When are we going swimming?

Oh no, you have to wait half an hour.

-Right, Mel?

-That's such an old wives' tale.

-What's so funny?

-Your sayings, Nico.

You're so...responsible.

Not naughty like before!

(Melissa) Naughty?

Our Carbo?

Surely not.

When I was six, he came to stay in our village.

Everyone remembers Nico.

-What did you do?

-I kind of borrowed her dad's car.

We drove all over the island.

My father was so angry!

It was so much fun.

-Well, how old were you?

-About 12?

(exclaiming) (Artie) After that, I always wanted to visit Nico here in Australia.

(Carbo) Come on, I reckon we'll stick our toes in the water.

(sultry music) Whoa!

I said toes, yeah?

-Beat you down there!

-And put your top back on!

Artie!

(Artie) Dane!

♪ It is so good to finally meet you.

♪ (phone rings) (Nathan) Oh, your phone.

-Not from Jake, then?

-Uh-uh.

So he hasn't spoken to you in-- in, what, a week now.

-Maybe that's a good thing.

-Ugh.

How is that a good thing, Nathan?

Mother issues can turn into Norman Bates territory.

(Rachel) Ah, see, but Jake doesn't have mother issues.

She's got son issues.

(Sammy) Are you gonna wait for the economy to improve?

(Owen) I dunno.

Might take years.

I don't wanna get stuck in a rut.

-I know the feeling.

-Hm.

Sammy, I'm starving.

If we're gonna keep going with this, -we should at least get dinner.

-Oh, I-- There's a great new place around the corner.

(Sammy) Yeah, look, I've got more than enough.

You've been great, thank you.

But I haven't given you my best insights.

-Nathan will be waiting for me.

-They're worth hearing.

Trust me.

Solid gold for your article.

(Ben) Funny thing is, sometimes you know precisely what's coming at you.

Up to you.

My shout.

(Ben) But you don't move to stop it, even when you know you should.

(Nathan) Yeah.

Yeah, okay, I'll see you-- I'll see you when you get home.

Okay, bye.

(Rachel) Oh!

It's nice to see Sammy asks your permission before she eats.

She's out with Owen.

Right.

But I'm trusting her and she's trusting me.

(phone rings) Oh!

That's probably Sammy again, then, just wondering if she can have dessert, too.

(beep) Layla, hey.

Uh, that's a little bit of late notice.

Can we possibly make it another night?

Right, okay.

Uh, where and when?

Okay.

I'll see you there.

Bye.

(beep) Layla.

(sighs) I've got two words to say about that woman: bad influence.

-I did drugs once.

-Yeah, well, two strikes and you're out, remember?

Yeah, well, like I said, trust both ways.

Can we please just drop it?

It's dropped.

♪ (Carbo) She'll be at the dock before she even leaves the beach.

(Melissa) When did you get so stitched-up?

(Carbo) When Mom got out of the cab.

(Melissa) Artie's just having a good time.

-So is Dane, I reckon.

-Oi!

Hands above the water!

-Above the water!

-Come on!

It's sort of sweet, like long-distance romance.

(Carbo) Sweet?

She met him on Facebook, and talking on Skype doesn't count, it's not real.

(Ben) Well, they're definitely making up for lost time.

(Melissa) And what is wrong with that?

She's an adult.

We're all here, it's not like he's gonna violate her -in front of us.

-Shh!

Don't even say that out loud.

Greek mothers have sonic hearing, like bats.

(Artie) Dane's taking me for a jig at the puff.

-Gig.

To a gig.

-A gig at the pub.

See?

I learned two new words already.

Yeah, I bet there's a few more he wants to teach you, too.

Hey, uh, so you're in a band, mate?

(Dane) Yeah, that's right.

(Melissa) So what kind of music do you play?

(Carbo) Oi!

I thought you said you guys were gonna help!

Why are we pretending this is normal?

This is not normal.

-Carbo... -No, look, I'm not gonna lie to your parents so you can screw around, okay?

It's not gonna happen.

Come on.

(Artie) You can't tell me what to do!

-Mate, this is so not cool.

-Yeah, neither are you.

Come on, we're going.

-Carbo... -You heard me--stop.

And get lost, mate.

-Nicolakimu!

-Nicolakimu is dead!

And you need to get some sleep.

Ben, Mel, move it.

(Ben) Carbo had had it with blows to the head.

It was time to start kicking a few goals.

(tense music) ♪ (Carbo) Artie?

♪ (makes shuffling noises) ♪ -You looked on her Facebook?

-Well, she was asleep!

(Mel) Is that supposed to make it better?

(Ben) Mate, it's going a bit too far.

-You can't spy on her.

-Why not?

Listen.

If the Trojans looked up the wooden horse's bum, they might still be here today.

Look.

All is fair in love and war.

-And which is this?

-Well, what do you think?

Forewarned is forearmed.

Listen, the last message was sent just before we went to the beach.

That's how he knew we were there.

Mate, you're cracking up.

-You can't do this.

-Look, I can and I am.

I'm gonna save her from herself.

I'm starving.

(Ben) Carbo.

(Carbo) I know, I know, mate.

Okay?

I know you don't get it.

(sighs) Whoa.

Want some moussaka?

(Ben) I wanna know what's going on.

But, uh, yeah, cut me a piece.

Mate, the last time you mentioned Artie was years ago.

-What's up?

-It's a Greek thing.

(Ben) Oh, stop it with the Greek thing.

It's Carbo Carbo, not Greek Carbo.

-Have you got the hots for her?

-What?

No!

Look, mate, she's like a baby sister.

I told you, okay?

I just don't want her to get busted.

(Ben) Why?

All right, fine.

You know that trip to Lesbos?

The time I met her?

It was straight after the under-12 soccer final.

You've probably forgotten that game?

Uh, the only time we got in the grand final, the one when you totally missed the shot off the free kick and cost us the championship?

(girls, in unison) Hey, Carbo!

Hey, whoo-hoo!

(upbeat music) (whistle blowing, cheering) -Don't listen to the girls!

-Come on!

(team grumbling) ♪ Yeah.

That's the one.

Anyway, it felt like I'd just lost the Grand Prix.

Okay?

Then, in Lesbos, I met Artie.

She followed me everywhere.

Yeah.

Nathan used to do that.

Deeply annoying.

(Carbo) But it wasn't, mate.

You know, I was a hero.

Like Achilles, Hercules, even the Socceroos.

Then I stole her dad's car.

She thought I was so cool.

-So the whole big brother-- -Look, I can't help it, you know?

Every time I look at her, I see this little girl, except now, she's this... giant girl that wears tight clothes, makeup, and goes out with guys with tats.

And that's why I have to look out for her.

Simple as that.

(Rita) Have you boys got any washing to do?

I can't sleep, I just keep lying there, my eyes like saucers.

I have to keep busy!

Thanks, Mom, that'd be great!

(Rita) Oh!

You found the moussaka.

That's it.

I'll make you some more.

Hm?

Not a word, okay?

I'll handle it.

♪ (Sammy) Obviously, the financial crisis hasn't impacted you that badly.

(Owen) I've been meaning to come here for ages, -but I had no one to bring, so-- -Oh, poor baby, desperate and dateless.

(Owen) No one I really wanted to share it with.

Whoa, hey, Sammy.

Relax.

It's over between us, I know that.

But I just have one question.

-Owen... -I've answered plenty of yours.

Please?

Thanks.

How long after we broke up did you get together with Nathan?

-Don't do this.

-I know you love him now, but did you hook up because you were on the rebound?

Of course not!

-This is ridiculous.

-Then why can't you tell me?

A few months?

A few weeks, Sammy?

Oh, weeks.

You have no right to ask me this.

-You left me.

-Sammy, wait, please.

You're right.

I shouldn't have brought it up.

(sighs) I'm happy you're happy.

I just...

I wish I'd never left.

Then I never would have met Nathan.

Exactly.

Look, let's just have a good time, eh?

As friends.

Please?

(mellow music plays in restaurant) ♪ (Sammy) Um...so what are you gonna have?

♪ (Layla) Hey.

(Nathan) Sorry I'm late.

There was a massive accident on Victoria Road.

I guess our client's running late too?

Um, he actually just canceled.

Yeah, I was gonna call you, but, um, I figured you'd almost be here, so... -Layla, you probably-- -But look, look.

We need to debrief anyway, so why not do it on the company tab?

Look, just sit down.

(Nathan sighs) Debrief about what?

Um, well, mainly about why you've been acting so weird all week.

I'm sorry?

Look, um, Nathan, if something is the matter, then I--then I think we should clear the air.

♪ Okay.

Uh, I think we've been blurring the lines a little.

(exclaims, laughs) Is that a cocaine pun?

Oh, no.

No, not deliberately, but... yeah, it is kind of about... ♪ You think I'm interested in you?

-Nathan, Nathan?

-Hm?

Relax, okay?

Your marriage vows are safe with me.

Okay.

(Layla) So.

Air cleared?

Can we eat now?

Actually, I might just go home.

Okay.

(tense music) What's wrong?

'Scuse me a sec.

♪ -Sam, hey.

-Hi.

This restaurant really must be the latest hot spot.

(Layla) Hi, Sammy, we're just, uh, having a client meeting.

Without the client.

(Nathan) You said you weren't coming home, so... (Layla) And we're actually just about to eat, so... why don't you invite your friend to join us?

-Or--or we... -Yeah, I'd just like a word with my husband, thanks.

-Yep.

-Okay.

(Nathan) Yeah.

♪ Sammy, before you say anything, the client did cancel.

Then why didn't Layla just cancel the dinner?

Because it was too late and we had issues to sort out.

-Work issues.

-And she had to do it at an expensive restaurant with mood lighting?

Like your interview with Owen?

Can we please just talk about this later?

I don't trust her.

(Layla) Hey, guys, is everything okay?

-Yeah, everything's fine.

-Good, 'cause I just talked to the waiter, and he's got us a table for four.

I thought it would be kind of weird, otherwise.

And, uh, your friend, he's very cute!

Look, I'll be there in a minute, I've just gotta go to the bathroom.

I'll go and talk to her, it'll be fine.

No.

Layla.

Layla!

♪ (Layla sighs) (Layla) Look, Sammy, I think there's been a bit of a misunderstanding.

-What would that be?

-Well, for some reason, you seem to think there's something going on between Nathan and me.

No, actually, I don't.

But I think you're trying it on with him.

(Layla) What, because we're having a meeting in a restaurant?

No, because you're lonely and angry that your boyfriend's cheating on you, so you're using Nathan to make yourself feel better.

So much for confidentiality.

(Sammy) Well, he had to give me some reason for getting home at 3 a.m. so often.

Or was that just the coke that you've been supplying him?

Sammy, that was once, okay?

And--and as for Steve... you know, maybe you're right.

Steve and I have an open relationship, okay?

And it works well most of the time.

But lately, not so much.

And the only person that lonely, angry Layla has to turn to who's even remotely interested in listening to her is Nathan.

Oh.

Right.

And I'm sorry if it has been difficult for you, but it really wasn't my intention, okay?

I'm sorry, I just-- No, don't be.

You know, if some strange woman was taking up all of my partner's time, I'd be pretty suspicious, too.

In fact, that's exactly my problem with Steve.

Now, um, the way I see it is that we have two choices.

That you can either slap my face and we can go for it in a full-on scrag fight, or else we can let it go and we can head back out there and be fabulous.

They'd both be pretty fun, but I think the second one's a bit more dignified, don't you?

(Ben) Nathan had expected a cat fight.

A truce was definitely out of left field.

-So you're sure you don't mind?

-What, mind talking about myself?

Sammy, you clearly do not know me yet.

Just call me tomorrow and we'll set up a time.

(Sammy) Okay.

And that's my assignment research done -in two days.

-Cool.

(Layla) And we make quite the information double act, I think.

(Owen) I'd better head.

Talk to you soon.

Let me know how the article goes.

Hey, um, what are your plans for the rest of the night?

(Owen) Home, shower, sleep.

Nightclub?

(Owen) Nice to meet you, Layla.

-Good night, Sammy.

-Goodbye.

-Nathan.

-See you, Owen.

(Layla) Oh well.

Next.

(Nathan) Oh no, I think it's probably time we got you to a cab.

(Layla) Oh, that time already?

Come on, guys.

Oh, my jacket!

Hold on.

(Nathan) About that meeting tomorrow.

I never told Sammy about that kiss, so can you please, just in case, don't mention it?

What kiss?

(Nathan) That night that we were out of it?

I was leaving and you kissed me?

No?

No, you don't remember it, do you?

(Layla) No, I don't.

I'm sorry.

No wonder you thought I was coming on to you.

But Nate, in the future, just... ignore everything I do when I'm under the influence.

(Nathan) Okay.

-You won't tell her, right?

-No.

My lips are sealed.

Unlike that night, apparently.

Um, anyway, say bye to Sammy for me.

I'm gonna go and get my own cab.

Okay.

Bye!

Careful!

(Ben) It never occurred to Nathan that if someone can forget a kiss when they're on drugs, they can also forget a promise when they're drunk.

♪ (engine rumbling) ♪ (Artie gasps) (Carbo) You go out there, I'll tell Mom the whole deal.

You scared me!

I don't want to but I will, then she'll take you straight back home.

What are you doing here?

"Pick you up at midnight and we can ride all night."

You've been on my computer?!

Shh!

You'll wake up Mom!

What are you, a prison guard?

(Carbo) Look, you don't know this guy from a rear spoiler!

I want to make sure you're safe!

(unintelligible exchange) Now, go to bed!

-I'm going out.

-No, you're not.

-I'm not a child!

-You're not going anywhere.

Watch me.

-Mom!

-Don't you dare!

-Hey, Mom!

-Shh!

Your choice: bed or Mom.

All right.

I'm going to bed.

(Carbo) Look, you can go on dates, fine.

But you do it the right way: open, honestly, in front of everyone.

But not Mom.

I hate you.

♪ (gate clanks) (insects chirring) (Carbo) If you're here to see Artie, you're wasting your time, mate.

Now, if you're legit, maybe we'll see you again.

But if this is just some kind of easy internet pickup, I guess we won't.

Either way, you'll be dealing with me, got it?

Now, get lost.

And make it quiet.

(door slams, tires squeal) (dog barking) Hey, nice job, mate.

-Reckon he'll come back?

-Nah.

He's gone.

Where's Artie?

Don't worry, she's in her room.

-I just checked.

-Thanks, mate.

-Any sign of Mom?

-No, she must have crashed.

This is doing my head in.

Why won't she listen to me?

-She's 18.

-Yeah, but that doesn't mean she can't see I'm just trying to look out for her.

-Yeah, she will.

-Hope so.

I'm not sure how much more of this I can take.

-'Night, mate.

-Good night.

(door closes) (Ben) Rita was playing a surprise game of her own, and this time, it wasn't Carbo who'd be hit from left of field.

(Rita) Artie's a little minx.

From a good family, but has her parents completely fooled, but not me or my Nico.

Just as I thought.

So that's why you're here, to make sure that Carbo can chaperone a teenage girl?

(Chrissey) Hi!

Sorry if I--oh.

(Julie) Hi!

Look who I, uh, ran into?

Ah, Chrissey!

There are things that need saying.

And there are things that were said.

Hug a grateful mother.

A boy like Nick does not give up unless guided by a wiser mind.

Older but wiser.

Nick got cold feet about the engagement just as much as I did.

But other women, women like you, are called cougars for a reason.

They have claws that cling tight.

But you let Nick go, and for that, I will always, always be grateful.

(Chrissey) Oh, Rita, gosh, that's... that is so generous.

We were just talking about Artie.

What about her?

(Rita) Well, you don't think I'd come all this way if I didn't have plans for the two of them?

The two of them?

-Artie and Carbo?

-As a couple?

(Rita) Well, of course!

(Chrissey) Well, I thought arranged marriages had gone out of fashion.

(Rita) Oh, it's not arranged, it's just encouraged.

-Um, does Carbo know?

-Of course not.

But he'll see sense.

I mean, they're perfect for each other.

Both Greek, family connections, similar interests, similar age.

But enough about my children.

Jules, are you all right?

Yeah, I just feel like I need to sit down... (Rita screams) ♪ (Chrissey) Okay, okay, here she comes.

Hey!

You back with us?

Don't rush.

-Go on.

-No, no, there's no rush.

-What happened?

-You fainted.

-Easy does it.

-Ohh!

-Has this happened before?

-Um...no.

I mean, I was feeling a bit lightheaded yesterday, but...

I just put it down to Dave and I overdoing it.

(Chrissey) Darling, you were unconscious.

(Rita) Come on, now, let's get you home to bed.

(Chrissey) No, no, no, the only place you're going is to see your doctor.

I don't want you going home until you've been checked out.

(Rita) Unwise in love, so wise in life.

Oh.

Thank you.

I think.

(chuckling) (Layla) Look, I can't promise I'll make much sense.

I'm feeling pretty fragile.

-Hungover.

-Yeah, that, and um... Steve called this morning, so needless to say, -there were fireworks.

-Oh.

Sorry.

(Layla) Oh no, don't be.

I'll get over it.

I always do.

I take it he does this a lot?

Mm, yeah, well, like I said, we're in a... sort of an open relationship.

Only occasionally, I get jealous.

I guess he's just a bit more open than me.

In fact, he's kinda open all hours.

-That sounds...awful.

-Yeah.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I--I don't want him to change.

In fact, I think it would be kind of better if everyone was like Steve.

(Sammy) How can you say that?

(Layla) Well, because he's not all screwed up by jealousy and guilt.

I mean, look at you and Nathan, for example.

You totally freaked out last night about one dinner.

And he freaked out about one tiny little kiss, it's just-- Kiss.

Sammy, I'm sorry, okay?

Look.

It was completely my fault.

-He kissed you?

-I was high.

No!

No, it was--it was me.

It was me.

Please do not get mad at him.

He did nothing wrong.

He didn't tell me.

See, this is my point exactly.

I mean, he hasn't done anything, but suddenly, he's guilty and you're jealous.

Sammy, how are you gonna cope when he does meet someone he's attracted to?

He's not supposed to be attracted to anyone else.

You seriously think in, what, the next 50 years, he's not gonna check out other women?

-And what about you?

-I don't wanna talk about this.

Yeah, because you are scared.

Because Owen still does it for you, and even if Nathan can't tell, I can.

See, what Steve would say the really scary thing is, that Nathan is gonna be the last guy... -Layla.

-...you are ever with.

-Layla!

-No, think about it.

Think about it, Sammy.

There are so many gorgeous people out there and you're never gonna -get a chance to... -Can we please just-- can we just get on with this?

(brooding music) (knocking at door) ♪ Is it safe to come in?

(Artie) Unless you're with Nico.

(Ben) Did you, uh, did you hear from Dane today?

And I bet you won't.

Look, Carbo's going overboard, but... he knows what guys like Dane are really like.

-What they want.

-Yes, and I wanted it too.

I'm 18, I make my own decisions.

So, uh, why do you care if your mom finds out?

Think about how you and Carbo were in Lesbos, how he's treating you now.

You're like a little sister to him.

He's just trying to protect you.

Look, I know he can be over the top, but he's just doing it because he really cares.

♪ Think about it.

♪ (door closes) -Ow!

-You okay, you comfortable?

-Would you stop fussing?

-Well, you fainted.

(Julie) Yeah, I just--I just have to take it easy for a few days.

-What caused it?

-She doesn't know.

But if it happens again, she's gonna send me for some tests.

(Dave) It was, um... -nothing that we did, was it?

-(Julie scoffs) (Julie) Well, if it is, it takes two, so don't beat yourself up.

And anyway, I asked-- she doesn't think it's that.

(Dave) All right, you just take it easy just in case.

-You want a cup of tea?

-I'd love one, thanks.

-Chrissey?

-Yeah, I'll get it.

(Dave) No, no, you sit down.

You deserve more than a cup of tea.

Oh!

-You are so lucky.

-Yeah, don't I know it.

In my choice of friends, too.

Thanks for today.

I'd kill for someone to look at me like that.

(utensils clanking) Unwise in love, so wise in life.

Rita has a way with words.

(Chrissey) Hey, Dave?

Jules is gonna take a rain check on that cup of tea.

She's actually pretty knackered.

Oh, okay.

You still want one?

No, thanks, I might head home.

(Dave) Chrissey, um...

Thanks again.

Oh, what are friends for?

(Dave) Oh, come on, you're more than just a friend.

You're practically family.

♪ Thanks--from me, Jules, and the baby.

We'll see you later.

See you.

(Dave) Drive carefully!

(Ben) Yep.

Life can hit you over the head with all sorts of things, most of which you have no control over.

♪ Right!

The wine's sorted.

Red's on the table, white's in the esky, pink could go either way.

Is that all the beer?

(Carbo) No, there's another six-pack in the Charger.

(Ben) Ah.

Dad just stuck his head over the fence and volunteered to cook.

Think he just wants a crack at your new barbie.

(Carbo) Well, maybe we should cancel.

What?

Don't be an idiot!

Mom's up and raring to go.

(Carbo) You can't have a barbecue without the guest of honor.

(Ben) Mate, it'll be fine, I promise.

Trust me.

I'm psychic about these things.

(Artie) Nico, can I help with the barbecue?

Uh...sure, that'd be great.

I'll, uh, just go and grab that other six-pack.

-Look, Artie-- -Let me speak first.

You don't know what it's like to grow up in our village.

-I can guess.

-It's worse for a girl.

I thought if anyone will help, Nico will.

I thought you'd understand.

Look, I understand guys like Dane.

Hey.

Sometimes, I can be a guy like Dane.

There's plenty of time.

You just don't have to do it all at once.

(Artie) Okay.

(Carbo) There are good guys out there.

(Artie) That's why I'm here.

To find a good man, a man I choose.

Nicolakimu!

You're the only one that can get away with calling me that.

Mom!

(Artie) I'm helping with the barbecue.

What can I do?

(Rita) Those there, take them out.

(mellow music) ♪ Your father said, "He can't look after himself, let alone a teenage girl."

Ohh!

Thank you for proving me right.

Oh, my little Nico, all grown up!

Oh, you're gonna make a wonderful husband one day.

My big, strong son!

I'm proud of you.

Now, close your mouth, makes you look simple.

(Carbo clears his throat) ♪ (Nathan) There you are.

How'd you go?

(Sammy) Fine, um... what are you doing?

(Nathan) Oh, I'm just grabbing some more supplies for the barbecue.

So the interview went well?

(Sammy) Mm-hm.

She, um, gave me more than I needed.

Good!

Good.

Well, I think you're gonna absolutely blitz this assignment.

We should--we should probably head back outside.

Why didn't you tell me she kissed you?

(exclaims) How did you... Well, it just slipped out, so... tell me now.

She was off her head.

Sam, she kissed me, I didn't kiss her, and you were already hostile towards her, I just--I didn't wanna give you any more reason to hate her.

(Sammy) So you were protecting her?

Yeah, I guess.

Sort of.

She's kind of fragile.

You're the one that needs protecting, Nathan!

Sam, nothing happened.

That's not the point!

She's unstable and you need to stay away from her.

(Nathan) Sam, I already talked to her about this, okay?

Last night, before I saw you.

I cannot believe you didn't tell me about this!

We promised we were gonna be open about everything.

I'm sorry.

Did she say anything else?

-Is there anything else?

-No!

Sam, that's it, I'm--I'm really sorry.

Sam, I'm... You're depressed at the thought that I'm the last person you're ever gonna be with?

What?

No, are you?

So if someone was attractive and you knew I wouldn't get jealous and no one was gonna get hurt, would you?

No.

-Not even be tempted?

-No.

No, Sam, not for a second.

I love you.

-Would you?

-No!

Never.

I married you, I don't want to be with anyone else.

(Nathan) That's really good to know, okay, 'cause that's all I want, too.

(Nathan sighs) (Artie) My yia-yia taught me this.

If it swings across, it's a boy; if it goes in a circle, it's a girl.

-Yeah, but does it work?

-In my family, yes.

-Okay.

-Look.

(gasping) -It's a girl!

-Oh!

A baby sister!

I don't know how I'm gonna feel about that.

(Julie) Oh, darling, you'll always be the honored first daughter, -I promise.

-Okay.

-Here you go, Ben-o.

-Thanks.

(Carbo) Hey, Ben, I don't know what you said to Artie, but thanks.

(Ben) What are mates for?

(Carbo) No, I mean it, thanks.

(Ben) Not gonna kiss me, are you?

That's a bit Greek.

(Dave) Meat's up!

(Julie) Hey, listen, thank you for today.

-I don't think I said it before.

-Oh, please.

Now, let me get you some food, huh?

(Julie) Thanks, Rita.

-For you, Nico.

-Oh!

I could've done that.

(Ben) Where's ours?

(Ted) Mate, you haven't got Mel well-trained enough.

(Mel) I heard that!

(Ted) Every man for himself.

(Carbo) Thanks.

I've got something for you.

I was gonna show it to you later, but I found this.

-It's you and me.

-Nico!

(Carbo) Yeah, Mom had it.

You're a top chick, Artie, and you should be out there partying with nice guys.

I just--I just don't want you to get hurt.

(soft music) -Because of her.

-Yeah.

Look, I reckon we go for a drive later.

Just like on Lesbos.

You know, check out the city at night.

-You're serious!

-Absolutely.

(Artie) Thank you, Nicolakimu.

(Ben) Like I said, Carbo was never very good at seeing things coming.

(thunk) (whistle blowing, cheering) So when they do come from left of field, what can a mate do?

What I've always done: the same thing he'd do for me.

You all right, mate?

I don't know.

(Ben) Be there to see him through it.

(female singer) ♪ Turn on the sun ♪ (Ben) Uh, way too Greek.

(female singer) ♪ Open the doors, tell everyone ♪ ♪ Bad times are out, good times are in ♪ -They sure are a pain, girls.

-But they're cute!

(female singer) ♪ Let's smile again ♪ ♪ (mellow music) ♪ (male singer, echoing) ♪ Seven ♪ (bright music)