(upbeat music) - Welcome to "Forum 360".

I'm your host, Leia' Love, where we have a global outlook from a local view.

Today, I am very excited to talk about an important topic.

I don't think we talk about it and highlight this area a lot, because it can be difficult for a lot of people.

So today, we are going to talk about planning for the unexpected.

We have with us Mr. March Ferguson.

Thank you for joining us.

- [March] Thank you.

- He is the funeral director for Rhoden Memorial Funeral Home, and we are going to hear a little bit about how to plan for the unexpected and be prepared for the unexpected.

So, if you could tell us a little bit about yourself.

I bet a lot of people ask you, how did you get into this field?

(March and Leia' laughing) - Well, of course, my name is March, I'm married, two grown children and a grandson who's dabbling in the business now.

We have him over there passing programs out.

So, he's learning at a very early age how to be courteous and kind, which is very important in this industry.

I came into the business around the age of 24 with the interest in driving the cars.

That was it.

Didn't have nothing to do with the bodies or working funerals, I just wanted to drive the limousines.

And then from there it just evolved about, you know, learning how the business operated and how it worked.

And then I got interested in back there with the bodies and you know, the director at the time, Al Rhoden, took that time to teach me and learn, you know, show me how to do those things.

And then I inquired about the school.

Then I said, "I'm gonna go ahead and do this."

And 36 years later, here I am.

- 36 years, wow.

- Yeah.

- Okay, so talking about preparing for the unexpected.

When someone is beginning that process, what would you tell them to start thinking about with that?

- Well, I would have 'em sit down and just talk with their family.

Most of the time that conversation comes up when they've been to a funeral and then they start thinking about it themself.

Maybe I should plan my own.

And then you get with your family and discuss what type of services that you want.

If you want a regular funeral, a service cremation, a direct burial.

So, that really brings the topic up.

You know, when you sit down thinking about your own.

- Now, I know for me, I had been to funerals, but I never sat down and talked with my dad about funeral planning.

And even when we knew that he was gonna be transitioning, we still, we just didn't have that conversation, because it was kind of hard.

So, what would you suggest for people who are trying to begin that conversation with someone who is like, "I don't wanna talk about it.

I don't wanna deal with it."

We know we need to plan and get ready for that.

- And it really depends on the family, how that conversation could come up.

So, because it, a lot of time oftentimes could come up in a comical way.

And when you hear people say, "Well, just put me in the ground.

Just bury me in the backyard."

So, that really kind of opens up the discussion.

Well, what if you decide you want to have a funeral?

Then that's when you letting your family know what type of services you may want.

At that point, that's when you really kind of getting your desired wishes together.

When you open up that discussion, well, it's gonna be a burial, we can have a funeral.

And then from there it just develops what type of funeral.

Is it gonna be at the funeral home?

Is it gonna be at the church?

Or do you just want to have a direct burial where there's no services?

Once the body, you know, once you pass away, you just have the body buried.

Or you can have what's called a service cremation, where you can have an actual service, then the cremation takes place afterwards.

Or you can have a direct cremation, no services, and know that's what families are going to.

Oftentimes now what we're seeing and it's developing is not so much up in this area.

It's what's called green burials, where the body, once the death has taken place, the body is put in a biogradeble casket and then put in the ground.

- I just talked to somebody who was telling me that that's what they wanted.

- Yeah.

- I didn't think that was an actual thing, but okay.

- So, you know, it is not so popular here, but in the southern part of Ohio, it's real popular there.

- Ooh, okay.

- Yeah.

- Does the northern part have a certain type that they still generally stick towards?

- Well, up in the northern part of Ohio, we're still going back forth with traditional burials and a lot more service cremations.

- Okay.

- When I was in school a long time ago, they were saying then that cremations were gonna supersede earth burials, which we've, over the years, within the probably last 10 years or so, we've seen more cremations than burials.

But that's just a trend that's been going on now.

- Okay.

Now, when someone is selecting a funeral home, what are some of the things that they should be looking for or ask when they go to meet a funeral director?

- I would say get to know that funeral home.

Get to know that director.

You wanna go someplace where you're gonna feel comfortable at.

And if you go somewhere and you're feeling uneasy, unsure, those are the times you ask that question.

Or if your heart and your mind is telling you, this is not the place for me, then you know, you have other options that you can't go to.

But I would recommend to get to know that funeral home, get to know that director, get to know the staff personnel.

Someplace where you're gonna go feel comfortable.

- Okay, and then are there any questions that they should have lined up before they go?

- I would say, you know, how long have you been in the business?

Have you done any family members?

Have you done any of my family members?

You know, just get to know that whole funeral home in general.

Listen to the results and the comments that's made outside the community.

You know, have this funeral home served this family before.

Talk with that family and see, you know, how they felt how the services went.

- Okay, so let me ask you this.

Let's say it's not the greatest funeral home.

What would be some key words or things that you'll be looking for when you go in or listening for and you like, oh, this may not be.

- I would personally say the personality and the attitude of the funeral staff.

- The staff, okay.

- If I'm going in someplace and even with the secretary, if I'm greeted in a unwelcoming way, that would be my first signal.

Okay, maybe this might not be the spot, or that director is just being real impatient.

or uncaring, or unconcerned.

That would really throw a red flag up with me, because at that point that family needs all that attention and that direction and guidance.

But you have to do it in a manner where it's natural.

- [Leia'] Yep, yep.

- And you gotta really feel for that family, because everybody that comes through there, their situation is different, their death is different.

And then that director needs to meet the need of that family.

- Why do you think it's important for people to pre-plan?

- I think it's important.

For one, you kind of get your desired wishes known to your family and friends.

The way you want it.

And then also you also lock in the cost too.

You know, when you do that pre-arrangement and then you set those costs up, currently, that's what it would be when it's time for it to be used.

- What are some of the costs that are associated with it?

- You have the cost of the funeral home itself, casket, all the sundry items, the cemetery, flowers, programs, police escorts, crematory charges, things of that nature.

- On average, what would you say most funerals would cost for each type?

- I would say here in this area, you're probably looking around 11,000 for a burial, depending on the cemetery.

- Okay.

- As far as a service cremation, if you're having actual service and the cremation, there's so many variables with that.

You may be safe to say at least around six.

There's ways you can, you know, streamline those costs.

It just on the family's wishes and desires.

- Okay, okay.

- But I would say on average.

- What about the green?

- The green burials really not so familiar with those, 'cause we haven't done those yet.

But that would probably be a little bit more cheaper.

than the regular burial here.

- So, when it comes to payment and your prepayment plan, what are the common forms of payment that are acceptable?

- Well, of course, it's cash.

Cash is always good.

- It's always king.

- Credit card, debit card, money orders, those are the forms of method of payment.

- And then insurance, when that comes into play.

- With the insurance, if you're doing your prearrangement, where you can actually prearrange your funeral, you could do what's called an assignment.

What that assignment is, is allocated that amount of money towards your funeral from the insurance company.

So, it's assigned.

So what you're doing, you're assigning this portion of your insurance proceeds to go for the funeral.

Anything that's remaining, will go back to that designated beneficiary.

- Okay, okay, is there anything that, you know, maybe some issues that come up when dealing with issue for the families on that side that they should kind of be aware of when planning?

- As far as insurance purposes, I would strongly recommend checking, do a regular check on your insurance.

To make sure everything is on point with it.

Make sure that it's not lapsed, there's no loans taken out against it, 'cause that's the worst thing you could do.

Come in to make arrangements, - And it's not there.

- and then there's nothing there, and then that's what I feel so bad about with families or they're misled thinking you just took that policy out and then the death occurs and there's a two-year contestability clause - [Leia'] And what's that?

- So, that means the insurance company is gonna contest that policy for the first two years.

Meaning when you make that application with that insurance, they'll go back, they'll pull the application, they'll pull medical records, and then to make sure that document wasn't falsified.

So, that's a way for the insurance companies to protect them themselves.

- So in reality, if you are gonna be using insurance, you should plan to not receive any of that money- - [March] Correct.

- Immediately for.

- And then depending on the insurance company, you may get back what you paid into it.

It's just dependent on that type of insurance.

But if it's a regular policy, life policy, they're definitely gonna contest it for the first two years unless it's a homicide case or a unexplainable death.

- Okay, that's good to know.

Insurance is always so tricky.

- It is.

- You know, you pay into it.

- Yeah.

- And you expect to be able to use it when you need it.

- Right, and you know, I would strongly recommend call your insurance agent, you know, do a yearly or every six months interval process just to do a check on your policy to make sure it is in good standing.

- Okay, if you are just tuning in, we are talking to March Ferguson about planning for the unexpected when you are pre-planning your funeral arrangements.

Okay, so about the different, I asked a couple of my friends what were their top questions about payment and pre-planning.

So one was, "What if I moved out of state and I've prepaid for everything, how does that transfer and work for me?"

- Okay, so if you did your prearrangements here in Ohio and then you decide to move to- - like Georgia.

- Georgia, California, that prearrangement can follow you.

- [Leia'] Okay.

- So, you would just connect with the local funeral home there.

Let 'em know that you've moved there and then that funeral home where you originated it at it would just transfer.

- Oh, okay, okay.

So, they would just have to go and find a place there that they would wanna transfer that to.

- Correct.

- Okay, what if they're in the military?

I know sometimes the military will cover things, but sometimes they won't I guess.

- And that's a good question.

Military, it's just like if you're a civilian you can still do your pre-arrangement.

But with the military, as long as you are a veteran, or a spouse of a veteran, or dependent of that veteran, you're entitled to have your military half the expenses covered.

- [Leia'] Okay.

- If you're going to a military facility.

- [Leia'] Okay.

- So, that means if you, the spouse, or the veteran, or a dependent, that individual could be entitled to be buried at the local national cemetery.

Which would take care of the grave, the opening and the closing of the grave, which a lot of people don't realize what that is until it's time to be used.

- [Leia'] And what is that?

- That's when you have to pay, you pay for the grave itself, then you have to pay for the opening and the closing of the grave.

For them to open the grave and then to close the grave.

- To put them in it, oh.

- But the military takes care of that.

The grave opening, the closing, the vault and a headstone.

If you're going out to a military facility.

If you're going to a public cemetery, then although you're military, you would still have to pay for that grave, the opening and the closing, and the vault.

But you are entitled to a military marker.

But there's a foundation fee that needs to be paid.

- See, all these little things they don't tell you, you know?

- That's something that doesn't come up until it's time to be used.

- Until it's time, yeah.

- Right, right, because a lot of cemeteries, I know the local cemeteries here, they do have a military section.

Where military personnel could be buried up, but you still gotta pay for it, because it's a public cemetery.

- Okay, okay, what about people who are on social security?

Does that effect their payment plans as well?

- No, 'cause you could still set your prearrangement up.

Now, if you're in a nursing home, now you got the issues with Medicaid and Medicare, because you gotta be careful with the spend down.

But you can still do your pre-arrangements.

- And what is spend down?

- That's where you're only allowed to have so much money in that account.

In your personal account.

Particularly, if you're in a nursing home.

But if you are on social security, you still can go ahead and prearrange it.

- You can prearrange it, you just can't prepay?

- You can prepay it.

You can prepay it With the social security.

There's a one time death benefit to a surviving spouse of $255.

So, as long as that individual is married, then it's up to social security to determine whatever payments may be to that.

- Does that automatically go or is that something they have to.

- It goes to social security automatically, but that person who's handling the arrangements stills to make contact with Social Security.

To let 'em know that the death has occurred.

But the way it's set up now, it automatically goes into Social Security.

- Okay, okay.

If people have their plans and their wishes are all in their will, are they fully covered at that point?

- Now, that's two total separate entities.

The will is what you're gonna leave behind for your loved ones.

You know, assets, cars, houses, big money accounts, things of that nature.

The pre-arrangement is what's set up for your funeral.

So, that's two separate things.

Now, if you have it in your will, and I've seen it, but we let 'em know we can't stop that, 'cause if you are having a public funeral, you can't deny somebody that you don't want, that you put in your will you don't want there.

You know, we would just have to kindly and politely ask them not to attend.

But that's a real touchy situation right there so.

- Okay, okay, because I know a lot of people will sometimes just assume that all of that is ready.

But they may not get access to the will until after the funeral.

So, they may not know what those actual wants are, right?

- Right, so that's just completely different- - Completely different.

- from the will.

- Okay, so they need to make sure that their loved one knows what is in their will.

- And then that goes back to the pre-arrangement and then then the pre-planning, 'cause you can actually sit down and decide how you want your funeral to go.

- Okay.

- You know, personally, I have mine set up.

I got a few things that nobody probably wouldn't think to have.

But I have it set up the way I want to go.

- Okay.

- And I sit down.

- Is there anything?

- Well, you know, I have five police escorts,- - Okay.

- 'cause I like the sound of the sirens.

(Leia' and March laughing) - All right.

- Yeah, I got a few things within this actual service itself.

My fraternity brothers are gonna play a part.

And then of course, my family so.

Yeah, and that's where you really personalizing it.

And that's one of the good things about doing a pre-planning, 'cause you could personalize it to your desired wishes.

- Now, how old should someone start thinking about this and thinking, okay, I need to start prearranging, pre-planning.

- There's really no age limit on it.

And I think really it really comes to light when they've been to a funeral.

And then that's what kind of opens up that floodgate.

Maybe I should start planning and thinking about my own.

So, there's really no age limit on that.

- No age.

So, when, oh, this was another big question.

If the funeral home closes, what happens to their policy if they prepaid?

- Those policies are, if you do it with a burial trust, they're insured.

So, if that funeral home were to close, that money is secured.

- Okay, so does the funeral home have their trust or do you have to get the trust?

- No, there's pre-need companies that we deal with and there's a lot of 'em out there.

But anyone you choose, that money is federally secured.

So, even if the funeral home were to go out the business you would just call contact where that money's being held at and it'd be returned or transferred to another funeral home.

- So maybe that's another good question to make sure that they ask the funeral home director.

- Right.

- So, what if somebody has planned everything out and they get it all finalized, but they're like, oh you know what, I've changed my mind.

Can they continue to make changes?

- You can.

- Or is there certain, okay.

- You can.

Now, that would probably go back from funeral home to funeral home.

because everybody's different.

- Okay.

- I know with my funeral home, I have one individual every six months.

They wanna come and they wanna add somebody on and they then they got mad, they wanna take somebody off or they just wanna come in and change something.

And they have every right to do that.

So, you can come in and change, add to it, delete to it.

There was a little bit of work, but you know, we have to do it to accommodate that family.

- Okay, are there any additional costs usually with that?

- We don't charge nothing for that.

I can't speak for other funeral homes, but we don't charge for that.

Actually, it is kind of fun in a sense, 'cause you know, for the ones who come in and do that you say, "Okay, you here again, who are you mad at now?"

(March and Leia' laughing) And then, you know, we'll laugh and talk about it, make those necessary changes and it'll sit there and then that call and come again.

Well, I wanna do something else.

Okay, let's set up a time.

Well, you don't even now have to set up a time, 'cause I already know, you know?

Because it's a personal funeral home for us.

Just come on in, we'll sit down and make the changes.

- Do you have one that has been probably one of your most memorable, you know, good experiences?

- I think the best memorable experience I can get or the satisfaction I could get out of it when, you know, the family won't even say a word.

They'll come in and nod their head.

He looks good.

She looks good.

Thank you.

That's the satisfaction I get out of it.

- Okay, now.

- And then, you know, I've done several family members so of course, you know, those are more personable for me too as well.

- Yeah.

Now, someone was interested in getting into this industry, just totally unaware of everything that goes into it.

What would you tell them to truly prepare them for being in this industry?

- I would say come into the funeral home, speak with the director and let 'em know, you know, that you are interested.

If that director has the time, he would take the time to show him or her the ins and outs of it and then read up on it.

Come around the funeral home.

And then the more you come around and learn it, you'll feel more comfortable, if that's what you really want to do.

Because everybody comes into the business for different reasons, but you have to have a heart and a compassion for it.

And then if you don't, you know, it is gonna expose itself right away.

- How did you learn how to compartmentalize, I guess, for lack of a better word, the empathy with dealing with like a lot of grief?

You know, you have a lot of emotions that you get to encounter.

So, how did you really learn how to process and handle all of that?

- And that's something that I still deal with on a daily basis.

And that could go from family to family, 'cause some families you develop relationships with or if it's family members.

And I know for me personally, you know, I try to do the best job that I possibly can.

But when you just put your all into it, I say, "I got it done, Lord, thank you."

And that's really, that's how I go about it.

- Okay.

- Yeah, but you know, I have my moments where I've sat on the funerals and I've shedded tears, but I felt that emotion.

So, that's why I say, you know, when you come into this business, if you come into it, you gotta have a heart for it, 'cause it's not for everybody.

- Okay.

So, what other reminders would you give to the family in planning and preparation for?

- You know, keep an open mind, you know, keep it open and discuss it.

So, whenever that time may comes and you know, you feel comfortable about it and most of the time your loved ones know what your wishes and desires are.

- Yeah, you know, one thing that got me with my dad's funeral, and I don't know why this is the thing that got me.

I was like, I don't know what his favorite color is.

And we were trying to get everybody to wear this color and I was just like, "I don't know what it is, I don't know my dad."

But it's those little things that you don't think about.

And again, with the conversations that you don't have and trying to prepare not only yourself, but your loved one too, 'cause that it goes both ways.

But you know, luckily, I guess we had a little bit more time, but for the other people who don't have time, when someone is unexpectedly taken, you know, I just really wanted to make sure we were having a good conversation of how to bring it up to people, how to be open with it, receptive, and make sure they were fully knowledgeable about understanding how to preplan and prearrange their funeral.

- Right, and that could go as far as the clothing, but clothing that individual's going to have, the color of the casket, even programs, flowers.

- The casket almost got me.

- Those little things like that.

And that means a lot, you know, if that director is in tune with the family as he or she should be, then you are helping that family along the way.

And you're sitting there listening, trying to get what they want to accommodate 'em.

Because really it is a final show and you got one chance to make it right.

So, you know, I have the mentality, when people gonna do it let's do it right the first time.

And you know, when you put your all and your heart into it, you know, you're keeping that communication open with the family, which is most important.

Because sometimes things will go off to the side, which oftentimes they do, but you correct it, you address it, and then you keep moving forward.

But the ultimate goal, as long as that's family is happy and satisfied, and they're okay and comfortable with everything.

And that's when you keep the lines of communication open with them.

- Well, thank you so much for your time today.

- Thank you.

- You're very knowledgeable and a wealth of information and I hope you all gain some valuable information.

Thank you for tuning in.

I'm your host, Leia' Love.

This is "Forum 360."

We have a global outlook from a local view, thank you.

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