>> TONIGHT ON RHODE ISLAND PBS WEEKLY -- >> A LOCAL GUITAR MAKER IS REIMAGINING HOW INSTRUMENTS ARE MADE.

>> LIKE A HIPPIE SOLUTION.

IT'S ACTUALLY TANGIBLE SOLUTIONS WITH EVERYDAY APPLICATIONS.

>> THERE'S A GREAT DEAL OF LIGHT POLLUTION IN RHODE ISLAND BECAUSE WE ARE SITUATED IN THE NORTHEAST AND ITS DENSELY POPULATED.

>> OF ALL THE POLLUTION ISSUES, THIS IS THE ONE THAT THE EVERYDAY PERSON CAN MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE IN WITH SUCH A MINIMAL EFFORT.

>> THEY DID NOT UNDERSTAND THAT I COULDN'T READ A SENTENCE IN PEOPLE MAGAZINE.

I COULD PAY ATTENTION TO A MOVIE.

I COULDN'T FOLLOW THE PLOT.

MY BRAIN WAS NOT PROCESSING.

>> GOOD EVENING.

WELCOME TO RHODE ISLAND PBS WEEKLY.

I AM MICHELLE SAN MIGUEL.

>> I AM PAMELA WANTS.

WE BEGIN WITH STORIES THAT EXPLORE ENVIRONMENT ISSUES.

>> FIRST, AS AWARENESS OF CLIMATE CHANGE GROWS, MORE PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO REDUCE THEIR IMPACT ON THE ENVIRONMENT.

SOME CHOOSE TO RIDE THEIR BICYCLES OR CARPOOL.

OTHERS GET SOLAR PANELS INSTALLED ON THE ROOFS.

IN OUR CONTINUING GREEN SEEKER SERIES, WE MEET A LOCAL ARTIST REDUCING HER FOOTPRINT THROUGH MUSIC.

>> I WAS QUICKLY DISENCHANTED BY THE MASS PRODUCTION, THINGS ON THE SHELVES THAT COULD ND UP IN THE TRASH.

>> ROCHELLE ROSENKRANZ HAD ESTABLISHED FOR SELF AS A FURNITURE MAKER AND INDUSTRIAL DESIGNER IN HER NATIVE FRANCE AND IN RHODE ISLAND, BUT SHE DECIDED ABOUT A DECADE AGO IT WAS TIME TO EXPLORE SOMETHING NEW.

>> I MISSED WORKING WITH MY HANDS.

AND I STARTED TO PLAY MUSIC AGAIN.

SO THAT REALLY PROPELLED EVERYTHING.

>> ROSENKRANZ FIRST CAME TO RHODE ISLAND AS AN EXCHANGE STUDENT AT THE RHODE ISLAND SCHOOL OF DESIGN.

SHE HAD AN INTERNSHIP WITH A COMPANY IN PROVIDENCE BEFORE HEADING BACK TO HER HOME NEAR PARIS.

>> THE COMPANY WHERE I DID MY INTERNSHIP CALLED ME BACK AND SAID, HEY, WE NEED A DESIGNER.

WE ENJOYED WORKING WITH YOU.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO WORK WITH US AGAIN?

I SAID, YOU KNOW WHAT?

EIGHT MONTHS IN PROVIDENCE WAS TOO SHORT.

I WILL GIVE YOU ANOTHER FEW YEARS.

>> WHAT DO YOU LOVE ABOUT PROVIDENCE?

>> YOU FEEL PART OF IT BUT IT'S BIG ENOUGH THAT THERE'S ALWAYS SOMETHING GOING ON.

IT IS GREAT TO BE AN ARTIST HERE IF YOU ARE A VISUAL ARTIST OR MUSICIAN.

IF YOU ARE NOT IN BOSTON -- YOU ARE NEXT TO BOSTON AND NEW YORK.

IT'S A GREAT PLACE FOR CREATIVE PEOPLE.

>> AND OVER THE YEARS, ROSENKRANZ SAYS HER OWN CREATIVE PROCESS FACED SOME INNER STRUGGLES.

SHE FELT TORN BETWEEN BEING A MUSICIAN AND A VISUAL ARTIST AND DREAMED OF COMBINING HER TWO PASSIONS.

>> WAS THERE A MOMENT WHEN HE REALIZED, GOSH -- WHEN YOU REALIZED, GOSH, I COULD MAKE A LIVING MAKING GUITARS?

>> YES.

OTHER PEOPLE DO IT SO WHY NOT ME?

I HAD BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT TOO LONG.

AND IT IS SCARY.

IT IS A DRASTIC CHANGE.

IT WAS WORTH THE RISK, THOUGH.

>> WORTH THE RISK BECAUSE SHE BELIEVES SHE HAS AN OBLIGATION TO HAND CRAFT GUITARS SUSTAINABLY.

>> I THINK YOU HAVE A DIFFERENT RESPECT FOR NATURE AND THE WAY TREES ARE BEING HARVESTED, THE WAY TREES ARE BEING CUT DOWN, VERSUS SOMEBODY WHO IS JUST BUYING A GUITAR AT A STORE.

>> RIGHT.

THEY ARE NOT THINKING ABOUT WHERE THESE MATERIALS COME FROM.

>> THAT'S TRUE.

MOST PEOPLE DON'T EVEN KNOW THE TYPE OF WOOD IN THEIR GUITAR OR THE STRUCTURE GOING ON INSIDE THEIR GUITAR.

>> ROSENKRANZ SAYS THE ENVIRONMENTAL IMPACT OF MAKING GUITARS HAS BEEN WELL-KNOWN FOR DECADES.

MUCH OF THE TIMBER USED FOR GUITARS COMES FROM OLD RARE TREES THAT PRODUCE GOOD ACOUSTICS, LIKE EBONY, MAHOGANY AND ROSEWOOD.

EXCESSIVE HARVESTING OF BRAZILIAN ROSEWOOD IN PARTICULAR HAS CONTRIBUTED TO ITS EXTREME ENDANGERMENT.

IT'S ONE OF THE REASONS WHY SHE IS SELECTIVE ABOUT WHERE SHE BUYS HER WOULD.

>> THIS IS FROM INDIA.

THE MAPLE IS FROM THE STATES.

I HAVE SOME CEDAR FROM SPAIN, SOME CEDAR FROM CALIFORNIA.

>> ROSENKRANZ PUTS IN LONG HOURS IN HER GUITAR STUDIO IN CRANSTON, WHICH SITS RIGHT BELOW HER APARTMENT.

SHE HAS A TWO-YEAR WAITLIST WAIT LIST FOR CUSTOMERS LOOKING TO BUY ONE OF HER HANDMADE GUITARS.

BUT WHEN THE PANDEMIC HIT, SHE SAYS BUSINESS CAME TO A HALT.

>> MUSICIANS ARE MY CLIENTS.

MUSICIANS ARE NOT WORKING.

IF THEY ARE NOT WORKING, I AM NOT WORKING.

SO IT WAS A PHONE CALL, EMAIL, TEXT MESSAGE, SAYING CAN WE PUT CONSTRUCTION ON HOLD?

MY TOUR GOT CANCELED AND THINGS LIKE THAT.

OK.

SO NOW WHAT?

I NOW HAVE ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD TO FINALLY BUILD THE THINGS I ALWAYS WANTED TO BUILD AND EXPERIMENT WITH AND NEVER HAD THE TIME TO DO.

>> BECAUSE YOU HAD NO BUSINESS?

BECAUSE THAT YEAR, THE BUSINESS WENT FROM EIGHT GUITARS TO ZERO.

>> SHE USED THAT TIME TO EXPERIMENT WITH MAKING INSTRUMENTS FROM OTHER MATERIALS WHILE WORKING PART-TIME AT RISD.

HER GUITARS.STANCE, THE BODY OF THEY ARE NOT CARVED.

THEY ARE GROWN.

ROSENKRANZ PACKS FOR MOLDS WITH MUSHROOM SPORES AND ORGANIC WASTE LIKE CORN HUSKS.

>> ACTUALLY GROWING A BODY IN MOTION IS CHEAPER THAN CUTTING A TREE ACROSS THE WORLD -- BODY IN MUSHROOMS IS CHEAPER THAN CUTTING A TREE ACROSS THE WORLD.

THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE.

IT DOESN'T LOOK AS GOOD AS FIGURED MAPLE.

IT LOOKS LIKE A GRANOLA BAR, BUT THERE'S KIND OF A BRUTALIST, YOU KNOW, AESTHETIC TO IT.

>> THE GROWTH OF THE MUSHROOMS FILLS ANY REMAINING SPACES AND BINDS IT ALL TOGETHER IN THE SHAPE OF THE MOLD.

THEN, ONCE IT IS DRY, ROSENKRANZ IS LEFT WITH A SOLID BOARD.

HER FRIEND STOPPED BY HER STUDIO TO TRY IT OUT.

>> IT'S PRETTY CLOSE.

BECAUSE IT'S MUSHROOM, I THINK OF A DELICIOUS PORCINI SOUP OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

BUT YEAH.

THERE'S DEFINITELY A DISTINCTIVE SOUND.

IT IS ABSOLUTELY NOT A WOODEN GUITAR.

THERE'S SOMETHING THAT IS -- THAT I FIND VERY PLEASING.

>> SHE IS NOT THE FIRST TO SEE THE POTENTIAL IN MYCELIUM, THE THREADLIKE BRANCHES THAT GROW BENEATH MUSHROOMS.

>> SEE, THIS GUITAR ENCOURAGES THAT KIND OF MUSIC.

IT DOES NOT ENCOURAGE -- ♪ I JUST LOVE THE SOUND.

>> MANY INDUSTRIES ARE TAKING NOTE.

FOR INSTANCE, THESE ADIDAS SNEAKERS WERE MADE FROM IT, AND IKEA HAS BEEN USING IT AS AN ALTERNATIVE TO STYROFOAM.

>> IT IS NOT, LIKE, A HIPPIE SOLUTION.

IT IS ACTUALLY A TANGIBLE SOLUTION WITH ACTUAL, EVERY APPLICATION NOW.

BUT NOBODY IS LOOKING AT THE ACOUSTICS OF THOSE.

WHAT IF THERE IS SOME SOLUTION THERE TOO?

SO I GAVE THEM SOMEWHERE TO BUILD FROM.

>> ROSENKRANZ NOT ONLY PROVED MYCELIUM CAN BE USED TO MAKE GUITARS, BUT SHE ALSO BUILT ONE FROM HONEYCOMBS.

>> THE HONEY OF THE BEES IS WITHIN THE RANGE OF THE GUITAR, 3.09 HERTZ, CLOSE TO THE A STRING ON THE GUITAR.

>> SHE KNEW HONEYCOMB WAS RESIDENT.

SHE DESIGNED A BRACING STRUCTURE AND WATCHED AS THE BEES BUILT THEIR COMB ALONG IT, BUT THEN, SHE FOUND HERSELF WITH A HONEY FILLED GUITAR THAT COULDN'T RESONATE.

>> SO I HAD TO LEAVE IT THE WHOLE WINTER FOR THEM TO EAT, BECAUSE IT'S CRUEL TO TAKE ALL THEIR FOOD.

THEY WORKED HARD AND NOW THEY ARE GOING TO STARVE?

I CANNOT DO THAT.

SO IN EARLY APRIL, I HAD A PERFECTLY CLEANED UP GUITAR THAT WAS EMPTY OF HONEY, THAT COULD RESONATE.

>> ROSENKRANZ ADMITS STRUMMING A GUITAR MADE FROM HONEYCOMB ISN'T PRACTICAL, BUT SHE SAYS IT'S HELPS HER BETTER UNDERSTAND HOW BIOMATERIALS CAN DIFFUSE SOUND.

>> WHAT DRIVES YOU TO EXPLORE THESE BIOMATERIALS, TO MAKE INSTRUMENTS?

>> IT'S JUST FUN.

I'M HAVING A BLAST.

I'M LEARNING SO MUCH.

AS I'M WORKING ON ONE, I START TO HAVE FIVE OTHER IDEAS.

THERE'S SO MUCH CURIOSITY.

THAT LEARNING CURVE IS EXPONENTIAL.

>> AND SHE CLEARLY LIKES A CHALLENGE.

WHILE SHE'S WORKING MORE WITH BIOMATERIALS, SHE STILL USES WOULD TO MAKE GUITARS, INCLUDING WOODS THAT CRAFTERS ONCE OVERLOOKED.

>> I SEE A LOT OF PEOPLE NOW ARE USING LOCAL WOODS.

WE SEE THE USE OF OSAGE ORANGE AROUND ILLINOIS MORE.

IT IS ALMOST LIKE EBONY.

PEOPLE THOUGHT IT WAS A TRASH WOOD IN THEIR YARD AND NOW IT'S TREASURE.

YOU LOOK AT THINGS DIFFERENTLY AND, YOU KNOW, REALLY HAVING SOME FIGURED MAPLE IS JUST FOR YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES AND YOU LISTEN.

IT DOES A PRETTY GOOD JOB.

♪ >> I AM CURIOUS.

YOU ARE SOMEONE WHO GOES TO BED EVERY NIGHT ENDING FEEL BETTER ABOUT THE WAY YOU ARE -- NIGHT AND YOU FEEL BETTER ABOUT THE WAY YOU ARE.

>> I DO.

I'M STILL WORRIED, BUT THE STATE OF THE AFFAIR AS FAR AS POLLUTION AND THE CONSEQUENCES THAT WE CAN FEEL ALREADY.

BUT I FEEL BETTER THAT I AM TRYING NOT TO CONTRIBUTE TO THAT AND THAT I CAN ALSO EDUCATE OTHERS.

SO, YOU KNOW, I FEEL BETTER THAN 10 YEARS AGO.

>> WE TURN NOW TO A FORM OF POLLUTION THAT'S RARELY TALKED ABOUT, BUT OVER THE YEARS, HAS TAKEN AWAY OUR CONNECTION TO THE SKY ABOVE.

IN ANOTHER INSTALLMENT OF OUR GREEN SEEKERS SERIES, PHOTOJOURNALIST AND EDITOR ROSS LIPMAN VISITED ONE RHODE ISLAND TOWN WHERE DARKNESS IS CREATING A WINDOW TO THE UNIVERSE.

>> WHEN I THINK OF LIGHT POLLUTION, I OFTEN THINK OF VAN GOGH.

HIS STORY NIGHT IS ONE OF THE MOST SEARCHED AND SOUGHT AFTER PIECES OF ARTWORK.

IT IS INCREDIBLE.

AND I THINK WHAT WOULD THAT PAINTING LOOK LIKE IF HE HAD LOOKED OUT AND SAW LIGHT POLLUTION IN FRANCE WHEN IT WAS INSPIRING HIM?

AND ALL OF THOSE BEAUTIFUL SWIRLS THAT YOU SEE IN THE NIGHT SKY THAT HE CREATED.

THAT WOULD -- THEY WOULD HAVE BEEN JUST BLOBS OF YELLOW FOG.

IF YOU WANT TO BE INSPIRED LIKE VAN GOGH WAS INSPIRED, WHERE DO YOU GO IN RHODE ISLAND?

FOR ME, I GO TO CHARLESTON.

THE ONLY PLACE IN RHODE ISLAND THAT I'VE EVER SEEN THE MILKY WAY IS IN CHARLESTON.

MY CHILDREN WENT MANY YEARS HAVING NEVER SEEN THE MILKY WAY, AND WHEN THEY FIRST SAW IT, THEY WERE ABSOLUTELY AMAZED.

>> CHARLESTOWN IS THIS LITTLE GEM IN RHODE ISLAND.

>> HOW ARE YOU GUYS TONIGHT?

>> ONCE YOU LEAVE THE BEACH, THE QUEST IS NOT OVER, BECAUSE WHEN THE SUN SETS, YOU HAVE THOUSANDS OF STARS OVERHEAD THAT YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SEE PRETTY MUCH ANYWHERE ELSE.

>> TO ME, IT IS LIKE THE LITTLE OBSERVATORY THAT COULD RHODE ISLAND.

IT GIVES YOU THESE FANTASTIC VIEWS.

>> THE MILKY WAY IS STARTING TO BECOME EVEN MORE VISIBLE TO US RIGHT NOW.

>> IT'S A PRETTY POWERFUL EXPERIENCE.

I THINK OF LIGHT POLLUTION AS JUST TOO MUCH LIGHT WHERE IT SHOULDN'T BE.

IT'S THIS IDEA THAT THERE IS AN EXTRAORDINARY AMOUNT OF LIGHT THAT'S UNNECESSARY, THAT IS DIRECTED INTO THE WRONG PLACE, THAT IS CROWDING OUT THE SKY WHERE WE CANNOT SEE THE NIGHT SKY ANY LONGER, WE CANNOT SEE THE STARS THAT WE HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SEE FOR GENERATIONS.

THERE'S A GREAT DEAL OF LIGHT POLLUTION IN RHODE ISLAND BECAUSE WE ARE SITUATED IN THE NORTHEAST AND ITS DENSELY POPULATED.

WHEN YOU HAVE THAT POPULATION IS YOU TYPICALLY HAVE A LOT OF BUILDINGS, A LOT OF STRUCTURES, AND THOSE ARE LIT UP PRETTY HEAVILY.

>> IF YOU WENT TO A SPOT LIKE THAT, YOU CAN GET OUTSIDE OF A LOT OF IT, AND ACTUALLY SEE A LOT MORE STARS, BUT THE MAJORITY OF PEOPLE LIVING IN RHODE ISLAND, THEY DON'T SEE THE MILKY WAY.

THEY DON'T LOOK UP AT THAT SKY AND SEE AN INSPIRATIONAL VIEW.

THEY SEE LIGHT POLLUTION.

>> I DO THINK THERE'S EXCESS LIGHT WHEN YOU ARE WALKING AROUND PROVIDENCE AT NIGHT.

I WOULD SAY THERE ARE AREAS TO BE ABLE TO FIX THAT WASN'T CAUSE PROBLEM -- THAT WOULD NOT CAUSE PROBLEMS TO CHANGE.

EVEN WAYS THE STATEHOUSE IS LIT AT NIGHT COULD BE DONE MORE SUBTLY.

MAKING SURE ALL THE STREETLIGHTS, THE NEIGHBORHOOD LIGHTS, CITY LIGHTS IN GENERAL ARE WELL SHIELDED, WHICH MEANS THE LIGHT IS BEING DIRECTED DOWN, BECAUSE WHEN YOU HAVE AN UNSHIELDED LIGHT, THERE'S A WHOLE LOT OF EXCESS LIGHT THAT BOUNCES UP TO THE SKY.

IT'S NOT ABOUT REMOVING LIGHTS, NOT COMPLETELY.

IT IS ABOUT LIGHTING BETTER, LIGHTING SMARTER.

I THINK THAT IS ONE THING I APPRECIATE ABOUT THE TOPIC OF LIGHT POLLUTION.

I THINK IT IS EMINENTLY FIXABLE.

>> OF ALL THE POLLUTION ISSUES THAT ARE OUT THERE, THIS IS THE ONE THAT THE EVERYDAY PERSON CAN REALLY MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE IN WITH SUCH A MINIMAL EFFORT.

WHEN YOU COME IN AT NIGHT, TURN OFF YOUR LIGHTS.

HIT THAT SWITCH.

>> CHARLESTOWN'S THE DARKEST SPOT AROUND -- ON THE ATLANTIC COAST BETWEEN NEW YORK AND BOSTON.

IF YOU ARE FLYING INTO RHODE ISLAND, YOU SEE THE LIGHTS ALL AROUND THE REGION, AND THEN THERE'S A DARK SPOT ALONG THE COAST, WHICH IS CHARLESTOWN.

WE PASSED A DARK SKY ORDINANCE IN 2012.

I THINK PEOPLE WHO HAVE LIVED HERE FOR A WHILE AND EXPERIENCED THE DARK SKY ARE VERY MUCH IN FAVOR OF PROTECTING IT.

FROSTY DREW OBSERVATORY IS IMPORTANT TO PROTECTING OUR DARK SKIES, BECAUSE IT'S SO EASY TO QUANTIFY WHAT IS BEING LOST, AND WHEN WE LOSE THE DARK SKY, WE WILL EVENTUALLY LOSE THE OBSERVATORY.

THEY WILL NOT BE ABLE TO DO THEIR WORK BECAUSE IT WILL BE LIKE EVERY OTHER PLACE.

>> WE HAVE TWO TELESCOPES IN THE COURTYARD YOU CAN GO UP TO WHENEVER YOU LIKE.

>> AWESOME.

>> PEOPLE NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT VIEW THAT EXISTS DOWN THERE -- >> WE ALSO HAVE THE PERSEIDS STILL HAPPENING, WHICH WILL RADIATE FROM THE CONSTELLATION PERSEID.

THERE REQUIRES EVERYONE TO WORK TOGETHER TO DO THAT.

♪ IT'S NOT JUST BECAUSE IT'S CHARLESTOWN THAT IT IS DARK.

IT IS BECAUSE EVERYONE IN CHARLESTOWN IS WORKING TO KEEP A DARK.

>> THE BIG DIPPER IS THESE THREE STARS MAKE THE HANDLE AND THE FOURTH HERE MAKES THE ROOT OF THE BOWL.

>> FROSTY DREW CAN PROVIDE THAT FIRST-HAND EXPERIENCE FOR RHODE ISLANDERS OF WHAT ABSOLUTE GEMS OUR UNIVERSE HAS FOR US AND HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO KEEP THAT LINK TO THE NIGHT SKY.

HUMANS HAVE BEEN LOOKING UP AT THE NIGHT SKY FOREVER, AND WE REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS WE ARE LOSING WHEN WE CUT OFF SUCH AN IMPORTANT PART OF OUR EXISTENCE, SO HAVING THAT DIRECT ACCESS TO THE NIGHT SKY FROM THE GROUND, FROM HERE ON EARTH, IS A REALLY IMPORTANT THING.

>> WHEN PROVIDENCE-BASED AND NEW YORK TIMES BEST-SELLING AUTHOR ANN HOOD LOST HER DAUGHTER TWO DECADES AGO, THE OVERWHELMING GRIEF TOOK OVER HER LIFE.

TONIGHT, SHE GIVES US HER TAKE ON COPING WITH GRIEF AND HOW PEOPLE CAN HELP SOMEONE COPING WITH A DEVASTATING LOSS.

>> PEOPLE DO LIVE ABOUT GRIEF.

THEY TELL YOU TIME WILL HEAL.

THEY TELL YOU GOD ONLY GIVES US WHAT WE CAN HANDLE.

THEY TELL YOU ALL THOSE PLATITUDES THAT REALLY DON'T APPLY AND DON'T HELP.

MY NAME IS ANN HOOD AND THIS IS MY TAKE ON COPING WITH GRIEF.

APRIL OF 2002 WAS AN INCREDIBLY UNUSUALLY HOT MONTH FOR NEW ENGLAND.

AND WHAT I DID NOT KNOW AND WOULD LATER LEARN IS THAT SPIKE IN TEMPERATURE DID SOMETHING STRANGE TO THE STRAP VIRUS -- THE STREP VIRUS THAT YOU GET STREP THROAT FROM.

MY DAUGHTER'S WAS THE VIRULENT KIND THEY CALL GALLOPING STREP.

SHE SPIKED A FEVER SO I RUSHED HER TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM, BUT WITHIN HOURS, THEY TELL ME MY DAUGHTER IS NOT GOING TO MAKE IT.

SHE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL FOR 36 HOURS BEFORE SHE DIED ON APRIL 18.

PART OF WHAT WRITERS DO IS MAKING SENSE OUT OF CHAOS, WHETHER WE ARE WRITING FICTION OR NONFICTION, BUT WHEN GRACE DIED, I COULD MAKE SENSE OF IT, AND WRITING REQUIRES IT OF WRITERS.

ANY TIME SOMEONE HANDED ME A NOTEBOOK OR GAVE ME ADVICE, I COULD JUST SHAKE MY HEAD, BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T UNDERSTAND THAT I COULDN'T READ A SENTENCE AND PEOPLE MAGAZINE.

I COULDN'T PAY ATTENTION TO A MOVIE.

I COULDN'T FOLLOW THE PLOT.

MY BRAIN WAS NOT PROCESSING THE WAY IT HAD FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE UP UNTIL THAT TIME.

I THINK PEOPLE, WONDERFUL PEOPLE, WANT TO FIX EVERYTHING.

YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU CALL A FRIEND, HAVE A BROKEN HEART, DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT YOUR JOB, YOU CALL SOMEONE FOR ADVICE.

THEY WANT TO HELP YOU, FIX IT, COME UP WITH A SOLUTION TO MAKE YOUR LIFE EASIER AND BETTER, BUT WHEN YOU LOSE SOMEONE, AND I HAVE TO SAY, LOSING YOUR FIVE-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER MAYBE IN PARTICULAR, THEY CANNOT FIX IT.

NO ONE CAN FIX IT.

I ALWAYS SAY, SIX MONTHS LATER, WHEN I LEARNED HOW TO KNIT, IT MADE MY CONCENTRATION BETTER.

I'M NOT VERY CRAFTY AND I HAD TO THINK HARD TO GET SEVEN STITCHES DONE CORRECTLY.

THAT ALLOWED ME TO START READING AGAIN.

I WAS TRAINING MY BRAIN HOW TO THINK AND CONCENTRATE AGAIN, AND SLOWLY, SLOWLY, I BEGAN TO WRITE AGAIN.

I WROTE AN ESSAY CALLED COMFORT THAT BECAME MY MEMOIR, COMFORT, ABOUT THE LIES PEOPLE TELL YOU WHEN YOU ARE GRIEVING, AND I WROTE IT WITH MY RESPONSES TO THEM, THE THINGS I WISHED I HAD THE COURAGE OR NERVE OR ENERGY TO SAY BUT JUST COULDN'T.

SO AS A WRITER, I WROTE THEM DOWN INSTEAD.

FOR ME AND I THINK FOR MANY OTHER PEOPLE, YOUR BRAIN IS LIKE AN OLD VCR STUCK ON REPLAY, WHERE IT KEEPS REPLAYING THE HOURS LEADING UP TO WHAT HAPPENED, AND FOR ME, THOSE HOURS BEGAN IN THE EMERGENCY ROOM, AND I WOULD START THERE, AND I WOULD JUST REPLAY IT, REPLAY IT, AND OF COURSE, THE END OF THAT LOOP IS GRACE DYING.

AND AS MUCH AS PEOPLE HAD TOLD ME, WRITE IT DOWN, IT MIGHT HELP, IT DID HELP TO EXPLORE GRIEF.

I STARTED WRITING ABOUT GRIEF IN MY FICTION, SO THAT I WAS WRITING AND EXPLORING DIFFERENT ASPECTS OF GRIEF WITH DISTANCE, AND THAT DISTANCE KIND OF OPENED THE DOOR, NOW, WHEN I THINK OF HER, I ALMOST NEVER THINK OF THE HOSPITAL.

I THINK OF HER AS SHE WAS.

MY ADVICE TO SOMEONE WHO IS GRIEVING, PERHAPS JUST STARTED GRIEVING, IS THERE'S NO RULEBOOK FOR THIS.

THERE'S NO ROADMAP TO FOLLOW.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU FEEL AND YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED.

AND DON'T TRY TO PLEASE THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU BY DOING WHAT THEY THINK YOU NEED.

IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND WHAT WILL HELP YOU, AND I KNOW THERE ARE TIMES YOU FEEL LIKE NOTHING WILL HELP YOU, AND IN THOSE TIMES, IT IS OK TO GIVE INTO CRYING OR AVOIDING PEOPLE OR WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO.

DON'T FALL INTO THE MISLEADING IDEA THAT THERE'S A WAY OUT, THAT EVERYBODY HAS TH SAME WAY OUT OF THIS.

MY ADVICE TO SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO HELP A FRIEND OR RELATIVE WHO IS GRIEVING IS TWOFOLD, DO SOMETHING EXTRAORDINARY AND DO SOMETHING SMALL.

SOMETHING EXTRAORDINARY.

I HAVE A FRIEND IN NEW YORK CITY WHO FELT TERRIBLE THAT SHE WASN'T NEAR ME AFTER GRACE DIED, THAT WE HAD ALL THESE MILES BETWEEN US, AND ONE DAY SHE DROVE THOSE THREE-POINT FIVE HOURS AND IT MADE ME FEEL GOOD FOR DAYS THA SOMEONE DID THAT EXTRUDE EVERYTHING.

ANOTHER FRIEND STAYED AWAY RESPECTFULLY, DIDN'T CALL, BUT SHE SENT ME A CARD EVERY DAY FOR 30 DAYS.

SO EVERY DAY I KNEW THAT SHE WAS THINKING OF ME.

SHOW UP IN WHATEVER WAY YOU CAN, AND DON'T EXPECT ANYTHING FROM THE PERSON WHO IS GRIEVING.

DO THOSE THINGS THAT ARE COMFORTING.

WE ALL KNOW HOW IT IS TO BE COMFORTED.

THINK OF THAT AND DO THAT FOR THEM.

MY NAME IS ANN HOOD AND THIS HAS BEEN MY TAKE ON COPING WITH GRIEF.

>> THAT'S OUR BROADCAST THIS EVENING.

THANK YOU FOR JOINING US.

I AM MICHELLE SAN MIGUEL.

>> I AM PAMELA WATTS.

WE'LL BE BACK NEXT WEEK WITH A NEW EDITION OF WEEKLY.

UNTIL THEN, YOU CAN VISIT US ONLINE TO SEE ALL OUR STORIES AND PAST EPISODES AT RIPBS.ORG OR LISTEN TO OUR PODCAST.

THANK YOU.

GOOD NIGHT.

♪