Annc: Murphy Austin, Adam Schoenfeld, LLP, focusing on business law and commercial litigation is proud to support Rob on the Road Region Rising.

More information available at MurphyAustin.com Narr: And now Rob on the Road, exploring Northern California.

Rob: Joining us now, Mary Beth Kropp and Michael Kropp, Jr.

It is great to see both of you.

Thank you for joining us and Rob at Home.

Mary Beth: Thank you, Rob, for having us.

We're truly honored to be here.

Michael: Thank you Rob, we really appreciate it.

Rob: I'm thrilled to have you both.

And I just have to start off with saying I am so impressed, touched and honored to have you here and to see how you have turned this extreme test into a testimony.

Um, Mary Beth, I'll start with you.

Your husband, love of your life, father to your children, passed away from colorectal cancer.

What is first, your message today?

Mary Beth: I, along with my boys, don't want any other family to experience this if we can prevent it.

The pain, the... the... the loss, the emptiness, the loneliness that comes with losing your best friend.

The father of my children.

You know, it's... it's...

I know many people experienced that loss, but because of the nature of colorectal cancer and the level of prevention that we could have had in place just makes us want to make sure we do everything we can to ensure that no family has to experience this the way that we did.

Rob: Tell me about Michael, Mary Beth, tell me about your husband.

Tell me about the type of person um, and tell me what happened.

Mary Beth: Wow that's a loaded question there.

Um, he is to me, the most amazing man on the face of the earth.

Um, he is...

He knew more about me, that I knew about myself.

We had a instant connection and a bond that I didn't appreciate until later.

And, you know, as I -- as people talk about Michael and what he meant to them, what he means to them, he always referred back to family first.

He wa -- he traveled he in his line of work.

He was in sales.

I mean, he was in you know, he did a lot of things that took him away from our house.

And we had to adjust our family life to, you know, really co-parent and navigate that system.

And we did it pretty seamlessly.

It wasn't perfect, no doubt.

But, um, he... he just was gentle.

Um, he... he did...

He spoke his mind.

He always speaks his mind.

So we hear his truth all the time.

He doesn't hide things or sugarcoat things.

We were definitely a balance.

I'm the more, you know, cuddle everybody up and make sure everybody feels good about them.

Michael would just be honest, but then be there to hold them up.

Um, his friends know that he is loyal to a fault and that he would do anything in the world.

He would give them the shirt off of his back, his family, his, you know, all of us there's he's that... he's that guy.

He's just that guy.

Um... And, you know, knowing that I lost him, it's irreplaceable.

You can't find that kind of love.

Um, The last two an -- two years since we lost Michael.

It's all I know is... Just refresh his love.

You know, I know that it is love.

And its this -- We just -- I know that he's telling me to do this.

I know that he's working with us and pushing us and guiding us and knowing that there's a purpose for all of this.

It has to be something we turn into, something positive Um, quickly about his story.

He was diagnosed in 2012 after experiencing several symptoms that he ignored as part of our quest.

And he was a guy who was 42, 43 when he was originally diagnosed.

He did not pay attention to his symptoms till it was too late, and then some prompting said it's time to go to a doctor.

We arrived at the doctor.

They... convince -- had to convince him to do a colonoscopy and they did.

And they pulled us back into his office, into the doctor's office, and said that you have cancer.

And, uh, 12 days later he was in surgery, which what we thought was removing his cancer.

Um, you know, fast forward through a lot of things.

He recovered.

There... there were lots of medical mistakes, things that happened along the way that we just we put our faith and trust in the medical system, that it was going to do all of the work that we needed it to do.

You know, the first thing the doctor said is don't look on the Internet about colorectal cancer because it will scare you.

And of course, I looked and it scared us and did not have good outcomes.

And so we just tried to figure it out and try to avoid things like that and put our faith in the medical system.

Fast forward 2019, after going through all of his surveillance, what we thought was his appropriate surveillance at the time, he was declared cancer free with no evidence of his disease.

And we thought life was going to be just fine until June 2020 when in a routine blood test found elevated liver levels, which led to an ultrasound that led to a CT that led to a PET scan, and so that he had stage four metastasized colon cancer in his liver.

So essentially the system missed it.

It wasn't that it appeared from October to June.

It had been growing for several years and essentially was he was deemed terminal.

And, you know, doctors jumped in with you know, we shared our story like, how can this be?

We just found out that everything was fine and now it's not.

And so connected us to just super amazing, sympathetic, amazing doctor that joined our team.

She referred us immediately to UCSF that, you know, we engaged with a doctor who was a specialist in early age onset colorectal cancer who gave us lots of support, um, lots of insight into what had happened in the previous nine years and really gave us hope and started Michael on his super aggressive treatment for colorectal cancer, which he responded to perfectly.

His body did everything that he wasn't supposed to do.

Everybody was amazed at his progress and everything that would happen.

He became eligible for surgery to remove the remnants of all of his tumors that essentially had died.

And so we were set up and sent again to a Stanford hospital to, you know, meet with a specialist about this, who was just an amazing man.

My husband had an instant bond with him because Michael is all about teaching and learning.

He was about making sure everybody knew his journey.

He lived it out loud, and so he knew he was in the greatest hands and then scheduled for surgery through some, you know, some prep and things like that.

And sadly, he never made it out of the surgery.

He passed away due to a complication that could have been the result of damage from previous surgeries that we just didn't have enough information about.

So it wasn't he would die cancer free, which was all he wanted.

He did not want to be a cancer patient for life.

The doctor successfully removed all of the remnants of his tumor, but the damage in his liver and his internal organs was just too great.

And after 16 days in ICU, he passed away sadly, two days before Christmas in 2021.

So that's our story.

It's certainly changed.

Our outlook is changed.

You know, our... our life in so many ways.

And so and the only way we can move forward is to put this up into a positive light Rob: Yes.

To -- You know, I... You said something very strongly there, and I'll touch on that in a moment.

But first, I have to honor and recognize that journey.

And there really are no words to put around that except for that I see you.

I hear you both.

And I am so sorry for all of the moments along the way that you had to endure.

Um, and you said move forward.

And I...

I like the words carry forward.

Right?

We carry him forward.

Michael Junior, um, hearing your mom talk about all of this, I just first have to... to bring you in by saying I...

I see you.

I'm here to listen.

We all are.

And what are the first things that come to mind for you right now?

Michael: Um, it was tough to... to leave for extended periods of time, but I was fortunate to, you know, be with my family during the - my dad's last moments.

And then really the aftermath was kind of it was tough.

So we had to make some hard decisions um, and really to move forward.

And it was hard for me to leave, uh, my mom alone just because she hadn't been alone for ever.

Um, so that was tough.

But, you know, building this organization.

Um, kind of, I think, initially started like, hey, mom, here's something that we can do to keep your mind and keep Dad's memory alive.

But it kind of -- it grew, not surprisingly, into something that hopefully can touch more people's lives and prevent this story from being retold, um, and hopefully not having any more wives or any of husbands or sons and daughters have to deal with the hardship that we dealt with, um, even though it happens all the time, unfortunately.

Rob: I do also want to ask, you know, I know part of your organization.

Tell me about your organization, Mike.

It's called Big Mike's Bottom Line.

Michael: Yeah, so Big Mike's Bottom Line, kind of a... kind of a pun in there.

You know, my dad and my brother used to call him Big Mike.

Uh, so that's where we got that.

And bottom line, you know, it's uncomfortable.

But, you know, the colon cancer is dealing with, you know, the lower half of our body.

So it's kind of a homage and, you know, some a little bit funny.

But it still, I think, hits the point, uh...

Rob: As well as the bottom line that we got to talk about it.

Michael: Exactly.

And so it's a nice double entendre there.

Really, our... our main goal is to we're not into doing the research because there's many organizations that are doing the actual research on colon cancer.

We're not doing, you know, uh, recovery stuff.

We're focused on how do we prevent everyone from getting into that recovery phase by doing early screening and even just knowing your signs um, and just understanding what some of those signs and symptoms are, just those subtle changes over time that could be the precursors to, “hey, let me get checked.

” There's some cancerous polyps that we could get rid of in a quick surgery.

Boom.

Your done.

Rob: Can we talk about the signs and the symptoms and which of you would like to talk about those?

Mary Beth: I...

I can certainly tell you, you know, the signs and symptoms of colorectal cancer are very similar to a lot of other GI issues.

And so for us, it's educating the right way and making sure that we're not saying that the signs and symptoms are are precursors to leading to colorectal cancer.

They are signs and symptoms to pay attention to.

So simple symptoms are, you know, unexplained weight loss, cramping, abdominal cramping, diarrhea, constipation, changes in your bowel habits more than anything else.

The scary part is that no symptoms tends to occur quite often.

And so, you know, part of what we really hope to accomplish is to just get a conversation going about regular bowel habits and what it means, like, why is that such an indicator of your health?

So when you -- if you know what a regular bowel habit is and you can see changes in your system, that's an indicator that we need to seek further assistance.

And again, you know, Michael say -- said that we don't want to be in the diagnostic phase, we want to be in the education phase.

So we have an ACE.

You know, our mantra is to ACE, to alleviate, communicate and educate about colorectal cancer, break the stigma so we can talk about it, um, communicate effectively what signs and symptoms are, so we can educate people on what steps to take next.

And really just break this cycle Rob: Um, and also age, as we used to think that this was something reserved for over a certain age.

You're 29 years old, Mike, and, um, your father first became sick at 42.

Now is it 15 or 10 years prior that you have to get checked?

Michael: Um, so for my organization who I work for, they do ten years.

Um, I know that some other organizations in the private sector have more lenient, like if you have the conversation.

So, who my brother works for, there -- he's doing it at 15, so I'll get it done when I'm 32.

But from the initial part of when my dad got diagnosed, they estimated he probably had some polyps or something, a precursor about 10 to 8 years before he actually got diagnosed.

So it is relatively slow growing.

But when it does grow and like my mom said, sometimes there's no symptoms.

So it's, you never know until unfortunately it's too late.

Rob: And, he -- I mean that... that means he potentially could have been 32 when it started and not have known.

Mary Beth: Rob, Right now, this -- the cancer is, um, quickly becoming that number one cancer killer from 45.

You know, it's 20 to 45 is really the range we're looking at.

The screening age is 45 right now.

So looking at that, that entire range, the screening used to be 50.

They have lowered it to 45 because of the increased incurrence right now for younger people.

But yes, Michael... Michael admittedly shared with us that he didn't want to talk about his symptoms easily 4 to 5 years before he actually did something about it.

Rob: Do you know what they were?

Mary Beth: He called it - Rectal bleeding for the most part.

He had blood in the stool, which is a very big, huge sign.

Im sorry, I probably didn't mention that one, but if it happens once or twice, it's not as concerning as if it's happening every day or every week or over a long range of time.

So, you know, he had those symptoms.

He had a lot of abdominal cramping that he couldn't really associate with.

And so those are his biggest things, is that he had rectal bleeding.

Um, he used to be a super regular person and he would you know, that was like his thing.

Michael was always calculated and planned out.

And even with his travel life, his... his regular bowel habits pretty much dictated his travel schedules, like he knew, you know, what time his flights are going to be.

He knew all of those things that were happening.

And so when he started to see changes in his own bowel habits, um, he didn't pay attention, you know, And, you know, I didn't pay attention.

Um, none of us really knew we didn't think about this.

And and, yes, when you go to the doctor and you're 43 years old and, you know, we have issues and problems, that the first thing that doctor is going to jump to is not colorectal cancer.

You know, it's like, let's change your diet.

Let's look at different things in your system.

Let me you know, let's what other things are going on because that's a big jump to colorectal cancer.

And so, again, one of the things that we're really hoping to do is just keep people educated.

If we all just turned around and looked at the poop every day, you know, we would have at least a baseline and some conversation around that and then know when to talk to somebody, know when to have this conversation.

Um, we've had a lot of you know, there's a... there's a lot of organizations out there that are battling colorectal cancer awareness and prevention and things like that.

What to us is unique about what we're trying to do is that we want to start by just educating people well below the need, you know, for us to even talk about what colorectal cancer is.

If we would have had conversations, if we could have literally sat around the kitchen table and said, “Hey, how are your bowel habits today?

” Our whole lives could be different right now, but because it's an uncomfortable topic and not something that's, you know, its... its still taboo to have a lot of conversations around that, it just makes it more difficult.

So we're trying to break that.

We want to just have -- We want to sit around our table and talk about our bowel habits, you know, We want to make it fun - Rob: Its interesting that you say that because, um, Betty Ford brought light in and cameras in to the hospital recovering room when she was recovering from breast cancer.

She did the same thing with, um, being public about addiction.

These were two areas that were taboo to discuss until those changes in her life that she made public.

You're doing the same thing through your husband, and through your dad.

It's really important.

Mary Beth: It... it truly is.

That's how we change the world.

We have to start the movement.

And so we you know, our movement, whether it be a bowel movement or a conversation movement, it's about just being straight and, you know, and you think about there's probably zero people I can find that say, um, why is October Pink?

We know October is pink, so we can raise awareness around breast cancer.

So we have done our research on that too, is like, how do we start this?

And it's just doing exactly this.

Let's invite it to normalcy, let's change the narrative and help people just have a conversation around things and bring awareness.

We -- people need to know that colorectal cancer is the number one killer of people under the age of 45, the number one cancer killer.

So how can we have a cancer that's almost preventable, become the number one killer for young people?

It's typically an old man's disease.

So, older people who are diagnosed, it's not out of the realm.

It's not out of the... it's a... it's a cancer.

It's happening.

But because it's happening younger and younger and younger, we have to get the conversation started faster - Rob: Because something is happening.

Something is.

Mary Beth: Correct.

Rob: Through your organization is there going to be something that will help champion your cause that we can help spread?

Michael: I think the biggest thing for us is really just, uh, having that conversation and being -- exposing people to, like, here are the... here are the symptoms here are the signs here are the different types of bowel movements that you can have, which ones are the ones you need to look out for, which ones are normal.

Rob: To you, Mary Beth, It would be understandable and easy to understand, but hard for your life to try to carry forward in anger or in... or in purpose.

Sometimes anger pushes purpose.

How do you keep yourself in the light?

How do you keep yourself on the day to day?

Because I know there are very hard days, but how do you keep yourself carrying forward?

Mary Beth: By talking about it.

Ironically enough, Rob, you don't even know this yet, but today is my anniversary.

So today is supposed to be the happiest day of my life.

And, um, it's the second happiest day when I can talk about Michael's legacy.

Michael was always about education, always about trying.

He -- from the first time he was diagnosed, he had a platform for speaking in his organization.

And so he would talk to people.

He would make light of, hey, I have colon cancer.

And yes, I had a nephrectomy and an ileostomy and he had bags and, you know, he had... he had things that people didn't want to talk about.

But Michael made light of it to... to help people feel more comfortable around him.

Um, he -- and that's what we have to carry on.

We have to carry forward the fact that he wanted to help people learn.

We are trying to take Michael's, what Michael's passions were and turn them into fun things to help break this stigma.

Remember, alleviate, we want to alleviate all of those stigmas that come with talking about bowels and poop and, you know, colorectal cancer.

I mean, some people can't even say it without getting embarrassed about, you know, talking about colons or rectums.

Its -- Those are facts of life.

And again, we are... we are inspired by what happened to the breast cancer awareness movement.

We want March to be March as National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month was first proclaimed in 2000.

Yet I don't know that I can find ten people who know that it is Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month, and we want to change that.

We want to just make the conversation simple because it is hard.

It is hard to get up in the morning when I lose purpose, when I don't know what to do in the morning, I get up because I know I'm going to do something to help another family.

Um, it is...

It's, you know, sending out my my sweet future daughter in law, who also is working with us, sends out weekly messages on our... on our social media, like just simple bottom lines that people can think about.

When I look at them and I see people react to them and, you know, give us an emoji or a follow, those are things that just I know that we're touching that many more people.

We have incredible board of directors that are... that stretch across the nation that are all touched by Michael life at some point and have really come together to support us in this endeavor and just keep giving us the energy that we need to have in order to move forward.

This is good for other people.

It's not just good for the Kropp family.

It's good for other people to have the conversation so we can stand up and say, you know, Michael, you made a difference in so many people's lives and you're going to continue to make a difference.

Rob: Happy anniversary.

Mary Beth: Thank you.

Do you ever feel him?

Mary Beth: All the time.

You know, it's... it's hard, you know, because I don't want to put it in my mind.

But, you know, we have these things, you know, little things that like things that we used to have with each other.

And I'll see them like crazy coincidences that, you know, I'll see you, like I'll look up in the sky and see a heart or a rock that's on the ground that, you know, is, you know, something?

I found a glove that had the I love you sign.

Like the fingers were pulled in, and I found a glove that on my walking path every day, you know, And it's like, those are the things that I know that he's here and he's pushing me to move forward when I'm sad, when, you know, I'm alone, when, you know, it's -- you have to believe.

You have to have faith.

And I have to believe that... that we are moving forward.

I love you're saying carry forward because that's what we have to do now.

He can't walk on his own, so we're carrying him forward and his legacy.

And I got two amazing kids that... that need to always know who their dad is and know how... how proud we are of them as parents.

Rob: If someone's having a hard time talking about this, then take the Kropps story and say, you know, I saw this family on television talking about their story and and use this story as an icebreaker.

Take... take this example and talk to someone.

Mary Beth: We know that everyone has a story and stories lead to relationships and relationships, lead to comfort.

And we just want people to be comfortable so they don't feel the pain that we feel.

Rob: I'm so proud of both of you, and I can only imagine how proud Michael is of both of you too.

Michael, Senior, Mary Beth: Thank you.

I know he's...

I know he's here.

Rob: I appreciate your... your hearts and your time and your passion because Mary Beth, you pushed, in the best way, this message forward.

And I'm so glad you did because you made this happen.

Mary Beth: Thank you.

I couldn't do it without your support.

And Rob, I just have to tell you too, you know, we've reached out to many media outlets.

We have been champing conversations, trying to get people just to have a conversation with us so they can hear our story, our story is not unique.

It's just our story.

And you responded, and I'm so grateful for you for opening the door for us and helping us really feel comfortable in that our story was valuable, and I think that's just a testament to who you are.

Um, you know, I appreciate that.

Michael would be proud.

He used to watch America's Heartland.

So I there's a connection.

I know...

I know, there's a reason that we were put in the same space together.

So thank you so much.

Rob: Your story is so valuable and so worthy and so necessary, and we're honored to share it.

Mary Beth: Thank you so much.

Michael: Thanks, Rob.

Rob: Thanks for joining us.

You can watch when you want.

On RobOnTheRoad.Org ♪♪ Annc: Murphy Austin, Adam Schoenfeld, LLP, focusing on business law and commercial litigation is proud to support Rob on the Road Region Rising.

More information available at MurphyAustin.com