Rob: On Rob at Home.

We are talking about hope today, this entire 30 minutes on hope, and it is for you.

Hope is here, says Bishop Parnell Lovelace, the founder and senior pastor of Sacramento's popular Center of Praise.

Rob at Home starts now.

Annc: And now, Rob on the Road, exploring Northern California.

Rob: He is affectionately called "The People's Bishop" in Sacramento, and it is such a pleasure to have Bishop Parnell Lovelace, Jr. join us, here, on Rob at Home.

Bishop Lovelace, it is great to see you.

Bishop Lovelace: And it's great to see you, Rob.

Always a joy to be in your presence, my friend.

Rob: Oh, I feel the same way about you.

I really do.

I consider you a friend and I'm glad you are here.

We are in a world today, where I think that we are seeing a lot of need for hope.

Tell me, first of all, how do you keep hope alive, and what exactly is hope?

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, let... let me start with this.

Let me start with the latter part of that.

What is hope?

Um, you know, Rob, hope is more than what, often, we have labeled it to be.

Often, we think of hope as being wishful thinking and, you know, this-— We even state it as though, "I hope this will happen.

I don't know if it will happen, but I hope it will."

But hope is so much deeper.

Hope is confidence.

It is assurance.

It is the belief that, uh, somehow, some way, things will change.

The circumstance will change.

The... the situation will change.

It will-— And even if it doesn't change, it is possible that through hope, that I will change within the midst of the circumstance, in the midst of the challenge, or whatever we're facing.

So, hope is... is deeply rooted in a confidence and belief that everything, regardless of what's fa-— what... what's being faced, is going to be okay, everything's going to be all right, that there's going to be, uh, some illumination to what seems to be a dark situation.

And so, for me, in keeping hope alive within my own life-— And... and, again, being a leader in our community, being a pastor, um, it's important that I keep hope alive, first and foremost, in my own heart, in order to, uh, encourage others to have hope.

And for me, it's the ability to constantly remind myself that, uh, this too shall pass, that, uh, this is not the end-all, that there's something beyond this.

What is it that I can learn?

How can I grow?

Uh, how can I be an encouragement to someone while I'm experiencing whatever I'm experiencing?

And to me, that is hope.

And it, a... again, it's... it's a confidence.

It's an assurance.

It's a belief that, uh, even if the situation doesn't change, there's something deeper, through my experience in it, that it changes me, that I'm better, not bitter, but better, through it.

And... and that's how I approach life.

That's how I approach even, uh, working and sharing with the people that I do, that, uh, there's always light at the end of the tunnel and it's not a train that's coming towards us.

Rob: Boy, that is a-— Wow.

That's, really, a flip of... of the way of thinking for a lot of people, because sometimes, hope is a... is a blank canvas.

Right?

It's like, "Well, I have hope for whatever..." hope things are going to go a certain way, or hope things are going to go the way you want them to go.

But you're saying that with hope, you should confidently know that it's going to be okay, and let's apply this to something.

Say someone just received a devastating diagnosis, or someone has died, or... Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: ...lost a job, or... or... or with COVID, with the-— with how we've seen it run rampant and the polarization politically and... and the human heart-to-heart being separated with... with COVID and politics and... and racial injustice.

How do you apply hope to all that?

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: You know, you've got 3,500 people sitting in your pews, looking at you.

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Yeah.

Well-— Rob: I repeat, how do you apply that?

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Well-— and here... here's a... a secret to that.

Often, when I think of hope, at times, and often, when we think of hope, we s... simply apply it to ourselves.

We've become very, uh, central to what we're going through, very focused on what we're going through.

And the very concept of hope is not merely attached to myself and attached to what I am facing.

Hope is attached to that which is observable, but often, because of my own situation, my fears, my frustrations, could be an illness, could be a death, I become very self-focused.

I...

I look inwardly, and I miss the observations of hope that present themselves around me.

But the fact that I can look and say that somebody cares when I've lost a loved one, someone cares when I'm sick and going through disease, or dis-ease within my own being, that there's someone-— that we care for one another.

Or, in the midst of what I'm facing, I look beyond what I'm facing and begin to share and care for others.

That... that... that's the power of hope.

That... that... that lets us know that regardless of what people might think and what we might feel and all that is going around us, all is not lost.

Uh, there is, within us, the ability to have confidence and assurance that everything is-— Again, it may not always look all right, but it will be all right.

Rob: You know, I...

I love that.

And I...

I think that it is so easy for people to focus on what is wrong... Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: ...and then, that manifest itself.

Bishop Lovelace: That is right.

Rob: When we focus on what is right, we see more of the light.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: We see more of... of what is good about, uh, each other.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: I want to ask you-— Why does it seem to take a near-death experience for everyone to get rid of all the bull?

Bishop Lovelace: Oftentimes, it takes tragedy, it takes pain, it takes hurt to awaken us of how fragile life is, how fragile we are.

Uh, if, again, the pandemic has not taught us anything, it has taught us to be appreciative, every day, of the life that we have.

It may not-— We may not have all the things we want and all the things we think we ought to have, but to be able to take and have breath, and to be able to, uh, see our family members and others in the community and just be together, um, I think that hopefully-— and I use that word intentionally, hope fully-— it moves us into a place that we become lef-— less selfish, less self-centered, and that we don't wait for trouble to come and challenges to come, but rather, we begin to celebrate one another.

Uh, frankly, we... we don't celebrate one another.

We don't celebrate life around us.

We don't celebrate the simple things, uh, whether it be children playing outside, or if it's, uh-— Wha... whatever the case might be, just celebrating life!

That... that's hope, you know, being thankful, not complaining all of the time.

It doesn't have to be a sunshiny day for me to say it's a good day.

The fact that I awakened this morning, and as the old folks used to say when I was growing up, "clothed in my right mind," that... that's hope.

That's-— That gives me an opportunity to know that it's not-— it doesn't end with what I'm facing, it does not end with what I'm challenged with, that each step that I take is moving me closer to seeing an outcome that, again, does not have to be, uh, uh, necessarily, the... the healing of cancer or the, you know, the fact that all of my loved ones will never die, you know, or anything.

I-— As long as I live on earth, there will be things that I will face in life.

But despite that, I wake up with a smile on my face, with an assurance that each day I have an opportunity to move from selfishness to being able to care and reach over towards someone else and help them be better, help their day be better.

I think I become a part of the narrative of hope for their lives.

Rob: I just heard something so powerful in what you said about, uh, getting out of selfishness, and that is by getting out of self, through service.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: Service will save you.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: It will save you from anything.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: Simple kindness... Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: ...to another human being, and it doesn't matter if it's a complete stranger.

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: Um, there are people isolated and lonely today, and when we pile on all the things that have been seen in... in recent years, there are a lot of people who are walking around with PTSD... Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: ...masses of people.

Um, when you hear that, I'd like to talk to you about your life, and how have you been able to get through times like that in your life?

And have you had them?

Bishop Lovelace: Oh, absolutely.

Absolutely.

Rob, you know, as I think through that, uh, I am a, uh, great-grandson of people who were enslaved in this nation.

I am the grandson of sharecroppers.

Uh, I am the son of parents, both parents, who served in the armed forces, and a... a father who served in Vietnam and Korea and came back to a country that showed little appreciation for the service that he had on behalf of this country, because they could not get past his skin color.

Uh, I come from a family that has experienced all of the... the trauma of divorce.

Uh, my parents, uh, again, experiencing all that they did, and my mother having to raise, uh, four, uh, boys, later to become young men, all by herself.

I've...

I've gone through all of that.

And yet, I've never sought to carry the role of the victim, uh, but rather, the victor, that, uh-— And I might say that this... this... this narrative of hope has always been presented before me, that I never saw myself stopping.

Um, trauma causes us to stop.

It causes us to become paralyzed.

It brings about fear.

Uh, trauma, in itself, is not the best motivator.

Uh, but in the midst of the trauma, the application that "This is not my stopping place," uh, "This is not where I need settle," that there is, again, something that is set before me, that if I can endure what I've endured, that if I'm still here, and I'm awakened, and I've been given another morning, there's another opportunity.

And because there's another opportunity, then it... it is incumbent upon me to step into those opportunities, whatever they are.

Uh, if I'm laying in a hospital bed and I'm hearing the doctor give me a poor prognosis, if I'm able to still breathe and know that, uh, I...

I have a desire to want to give more, uh, there's still some things I want to do, I believe that there's hope in that.

I believe that gives us the encouragement to go through the radiation, to go through the chemotherapy, to go through whatever we have to face.

When I have to, uh, bury a loved one and... and sadly, uh, say earthly goodbyes to people I love, uh, I have to, many times, for me-— and I encourage others to do this when they're grieving and mourning-— grieve well.

Mourn well.

Grieve well, mourn well, but in the midst of your grief, in the midst of your mourning, know that the person that you're honoring, really, has never left you, that their love, their encouragement, and that which they've imparted in us, resides here.

And... and let that be a catalyst.

Let that be a motivation of hope that gets us out of the bed of depression, that... that moves us out of, uh, isolating ourselves, and... and... and we begin to... to pull this-— the blinds up.

And we begin to respond to that which is around us, the stimuli of walking down the street and saying, "Good morning" to somebody, or s- or having someone say, "Good morning" to us, and we not merely just walk past them, but we respond to that "Good morning."

What are we saying?

It's another day.

It's another opportunity we have.

Let's... let's take advantage of the moment we have right now, and let's move from a place of despair to a place, possibly, possibly, that it looks better than where we've been, or where we are.

So, we step forward.

Rob: I love that.

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: I love that.

It's-— It is a different lens, um, on life.

It is a-— It's almost the only thing I can think of, Bishop, that you can wrap yourself in, that is in the moment, but not of it... Bishop Lovelace: That's it.

Rob: ...that is-— If... if we are in a bubble of hope, and I don't mean a bubble that keeps you in, but if we surround ourselves with this feeling of hope, our failures are yesterday, our fears are tomorrow, but hope is in this moment... Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: ...in the now.

Um, how do you explain that to someone who has-— You know, so many times, you have to get through it to be able to do it.

How do you explain that to someone who may have never been through it all the way... Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: ...that there is truly not that train coming down the track, always?

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Yeah.

Well-— Rob: Because I will tell you, we just saw a study come out that during the most recent past year-— overdoses, highest ever.

Suicides are up.

People are hurting.

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Yeah.

I... I-— In fact, I...

I'm familiar with that study, and I must tell you that-— And I tend to be-— I won't say an optimist.

Some would label, uh, this approach as being so optimistic, and I...

I don't think it's merely optimism.

I...

I...

I'm a little bit more direct when it comes to sharing with people.

Uh, some people, I...

I literally almost have to shake them and say, "Look, giving up is not an option.

I know you think it is, but it really is not an option for you," because the reality is... is that all of us have a purpose.

There is a purpose.

There's a plan.

There's that which, many times, we may not know the totality of what that purpose is and what that plan is for our lives, but there is a need for us to stay on the trajectory of seeking that out, seeking out that purpose.

And so, there... there's this, oftentimes, I think, for me, a... a tendency, when I'm talking to-— whether it's parishioners or people in the community or my family members, I...

I get a little bit bold.

I shake them up a little bit and I say, "You're not going to give up."

That-— And sometimes, they have to hear that, from outside of the voices that are speaking into their own hearts and mind the... the negativity, the... the emotional stress, and the things that come about from all the things that, again, all of us are facing.

There has to be a counter-voice, a counter-narrative that says there's a light, there's direction, there is-— Uh, even in the midst of the pain and the sadness and the discouragement, uh, joy will come.

Rob: And if you are alone, if you are alone, hearing this, and you don't have people around you... Bishop Lovelace: Absolutely.

Rob: ...you be that voice.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes!

Rob: Say it out loud yourself and hear yourself say it.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes, yes, yes, Rob.

You're... you're hitting it right on the head.

We have to-— I... I-— People say-— I tell them, "I talk to myself."

They said, "You talk to yourself?

You must talk to yourself 'cause you're going crazy."

I said, "No, no, no.

I talk to myself to keep from going crazy."

Rob: "...keep"!

Yeah.

Me too!

Bishop Lovelace: I talk to myself.

I talk to myself.

I tell my own self everything's going to be all right.

I tell my own self that this is the best day of my life.

And for me, it is-— it... it is not just positive affirmations.

It is a deeply rooted confidence that at times, yes, it takes time to develop that, but you start somewhere.

Oftentimes, I will, uh, spend time in my lone period, not "lonely-ness," but my-— an alone period.

I spend that time really talking to myself the narratives of life.

I realize, I speak out the fact that I'm here on purpose, for purpose, with purpose, that I'm not an accident.

I'm not a mistake, despite what all has taken place in my life-— as I mentioned, the... the trauma of coming from a divorce family-— uh, but not labeling myself, in staying in that place of that, "Well, I come from a divorce family."

I was told that I was going to be the least likely to achieve in high school, and my grades were nev-— Rob: You were told that-— You were told that?

Bishop Lovelace: I was told that because my grades were so low, my self-esteem was so low, and, uh, it... it-— You know, I didn't see my first A until I was in high school, and I was a senior in high school, to be exact.

But the point was that there was one, several people, a handful-— maybe about two or three people-— that said, "Young Lovelace, you're going to be somebody," that "There's a purpose for you.

There's a plan for you."

Now, I attached onto that.

I...

I connected to the hope that they saw in me.

There wasn't a hope that I had for myself.

They, themselves, had a hope for me.

But later, there became an internalization of what had been spoken over me.

And as I internalize the right things, not the negativity, not the fact that you'll never be anyone, you come from a divorced family.

I...

I didn't-— I...

I'd internalized that long enough.

At... at some point, I had to let all that go.

But I begin to internalize that somebody said, "Young Lovelace, you going to be something.

You gonna be somebody," and I began to say that.

I began to say, "I'm going to be someone."

Now, watch.

I started balance by saying, "I hope to be somebody," more wishful thinking, but then that hope became confidence.

And as that hope became confidence, then you begin to say, "I am whole, I am strong.

I have peace."

Rob: I just got it.

Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: I just got what you're talking about with hope... Bishop Lovelace: Yeah.

Rob: ...because at that young age, you could have clung to the negative voices... Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: ...but someone said to you, "Young Lovelace, you are going to be somebody."

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: And despite, or in spite, of everything that happened along the way... Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: ...that belief, that hope became fact.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: It didn't change, uh, loss, it didn't change grief or pain, but it changed you.

Bishop Lovelace: It changed me.

It changed me.

And see, that's where... that's where, uh, this idea of faith, uh, faith being that substance, that evidence, the substance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things that are not yet seen, uh, faith working with hope, again, assurance, confidence-— I just know that I know that I know.

If my late mother was here, she would say, "I just know in my knower."

Rob: Oh, that's beautiful.

Bishop Lovelace: "I know in my knower."

It... it cannot be explained just from human rationale.

It is something, Rob, so deeply with-— rooted within our very beings, and as we attach ourselves and embrace that, and... and more so, allow that to embrace us, I believe that's where strength comes.

I believe that's where joy comes.

That's where peace comes.

Um, in the sacred, uh, scriptures, it actually speaks of this.

It talks about "Now abideth faith, hope, and love; and the greatest of these being love."

I...

I think it all works together.

The more I have hope, the more my faith and confidence builds.

The more my faith and confidence build, I realize I am loved, and I have the capacity to love.

And all of that moves us, again, as stated earlier, from this place of selfishness to selflessness.

Rob: That's beautiful.

What must be shared from you today in... in this-— these closing moments?

If... if you had to say something, a burning desire on your heart, what would it be?

Bishop Lovelace: We've been through the storm.

We're going through the storm.

We've been through the rain.

We've been through some things that we would have never imagined having to face.

And I'm not even talking just about the pandemic, although that's huge.

All of us have been through some things that could have taken us out, could have destroyed us.

And the fact that we are still here means that there is still a purpose and a plan to be fulfilled.

And every day we wake up, if we can just believe that and receive that-— not merely embrace it but allow the truth of that to embrace us-— there's something that's being rewritten with... within the story of our lives.

There's something that, at the end of the book, it looks much different than the opening chapter.

So, I would say to myself, I would say to you, Rob, I would say to everyone, hold on.

Don't let go.

Help is on the way.

Hope is that which will sustain us until we see another outcome.

And even if things don't change, you change in it.

That's what makes the difference.

Rob: And you know that in your "knower."

Bishop Lovelace: I know it in my "knower."

Rob: In your "knower."

Bishop Lovelace: These things, I know.

Rob: We'll dedicate this show to your mama, 'cause that was her quote.

Bishop Lovelace: Yes.

Rob: Thank you so much, Bishop Parnell Lovelace, with the wonderful Center of Praise, uh, in Sacramento that you founded and... and you created and... and uh-— 32-plus years, correct?

Bishop Lovelace: That is correct.

32 years ago, started with 12 folks, and was hoping that somebody would come to church.

Rob: Yeah.

And there's that word again, hope.

Now, you got 3,500-plus, uh, as well as your online community.

Thank you so much for joining us, Bishop Lovelace.

It's great to see you, as always.

And again, thank you for filling us with hope today.

♪♪