And now the.

490 with Gretchen de Bakker might kill them.

And Kevin Mullin was.

Welcome in to the 419, powered by ZTE and presented by Retro Wealth Management.

I'm Kevin mullen, Gretchen de Becker.

Matt.

Kill him.

It is a Wellness Wednesday powered by presented by work spring.

I can't I can never get those adjectives right.

That's okay.

Is that an adjective?

That's okay too.

Okay, perfect.

I got.

No argument on.

My breath.

My brother, the English teacher, will correct me on this.

Oh I'm sure.

Yeah.

And he will be very happy about it.

Yeah.

I have all.

Of this stuff, and it's so easy.

You have nothing.

Yeah.

I have hand sanitizer, a couple of glasses.

Yeah, it's a growing collection.

It's very good.

You had an illness and it was okay.

It's tissues.

Yeah, but in your first alert bracelet.

What?

What is the actual like?

Walk me through.

So you have the phone.

I got water.

You got three different cups?

Yeah.

So you got a water cup?

Got it.

And then?

And then this is the mug, which, technically, I should have poured my hom coffee in, but I didn't.

Okay.

And this is just my name in case I forget it.

Okay.

It's on the mug.

Yep.

And then this is a lot of stuff.

Last week, a lot of little gifts are still here.

Yeah, Hank gave us some.

Some cool little.

Yeah, you know, trinkets and stuff.

So we talked, with with Hank.

Talked about, like, youth sports and rec sports.

It's taken me a couple of days to get.

To process to.

Yeah, to to process.

What what happened?

My daughter's, tea was in the playoffs in C while, And one really cool.

Like, I, we get the schedule and it says that my daughter's team is playing the first game at Lourdes University.

Sure.

Which is a really cool experience for sure.

But that court is huge.

Yeah.

And so I was like, terrified.

And so I do some work with Lord.

So I'm texting with the women's basketball coach at Lourdes saying like.

Can you come and coach?

How do I get ready, please?

Yeah, but like.

How do I get them read for this, like this experience.

And she goes.

Performanc enhancing drugs.

That's right.

That's what she said.

Yeah.

No.

She goes we practic until like 515, 530 on Friday.

Why don't you see if the girls can come over?

And so, like, Friday evening, our girls team went and joined the Lord's girls team, so that got a chance to see them practice, see the court.

We got about an hour to practice on the court.

Yeah.

And then a couple of the girls came and gave, like, a pep talk to.

Oh my God.

Oh, that's so nice.

And so last year, you know, we went into the playoffs, played a team we should have beaten and we lost.

Because it's it's a different game.

Right.

And mentally you got to get a different space.

And our girls didn't make that leap.

This year we won the first round.

Lost the second round, which was disappointing.

But the girls played so well.

Yeah.

And legitimately left everything on the court.

There was some skin left on the court.

There was some blood left on the.

It was a lot of tears left down the court.

It was it was great, but a really cool experience.

But yeah, we beat Notre Dame.

Okay.

The, the first round, and then lost to Saint Ursula in the second.

So it happens.

But yeah So put.

Out your best.

Effort.

We did, we did.

And so then this weekend is, this upcoming weekend is the championship.

And so, Saint Ursula and Queen of apostles are duking it out for the.

With.

Your seventh eighth grade champion.

The girls go to Boston.

So I put it on the calendar.

I don't, I don't know.

We'll see.

I think it's right.

You know, right now is not the right time to ask them.

And I'm going to give it, you know, we've got a couple of days to tell, so we'll follow up with them and see if that's something that they want to join.

I'd like to go see it because both teams that made it are playing really good.

Do you guys do like pizza o ice cream or something after it?

We'll do a postseason party.

Yep, yep.

So we've got the third and fourth grade boys.

That will do.

You know, we the kids typically want to do a family versus kid game.

Oh, fun.

And we're at the age, the kids are at the age where the parents don't hold back.

And so I think last year, the parents won by, like, 20.

It was great.

That's nuts.

Yeah.

We're good parents, but we are better at best than our children are.

All right, so it's a wellness.

And now everybody know if you're good for your covet.

Edition.

I now regret this entire conversation of who our next guest, children's.

Services will be.

That she is going to judge me.

And at my core.

And I am totally okay with that.

Sarah Best from Real Good Ventures will join us on the other side of this break as we kick off a Wellness Wednesday presented by works bring support for the 419 comes from We Row Wealth Management, where we understand that your financial path is personal.

Advisory services are offered through capital Investment Advisory Services LLC, securities offered through Capital Investment Group member Finra and SIPC.

More information at Retro advisors.com.

The 419 powered by CTE is made possible in part by supporters like you.

Thank you.

Introducing the local thread A community news series uniting voices and storytellers from across the region in partnership with La Prensa, the Toledo Free Press, the Sojourner Truth, Toledo Public Schools and veteran journalist Gerry Anderson.

The Local thread brings you stories and conversations that connect our community here at weeknights at seven on FM 91, with early access on podcast platforms each morning.

The local thread only on GTV.

Welcome back into the 419 it's a Wellness Wednesday edition presented by Works Great, and we're joined by Sarah Beth from Real Good Ventures.

Sarah, thanks for being here.

It is a pleasure.

Truly.

I love the topic.

What what is real good ventures?

We are a talent optimization consultancy.

I would say, a different way to package that is we're a management consulting firm, but basically we help companies solve their people problems.

And we would say that all business problems are people problems, and not that people are a problem either.

Well, they can be.

Yeah.

How we work together.

Yeah.

We have one on the show.

That's right, that's right.

This is already working.

So I mean when you say that like, oh you know, all problems or people problems, I mean, what are the kinds of like what's the most common peopl problems that your, your finding and dealing with?

Well, there's two that come to mind right away.

One is the bosses that are ill equipped, they're either not interested i or not able to adjust or adapt their leadership style to optimize the person they're responsible to develop.

That's one problem, and I think the other is just we're very different, messy, fallible, amazing human creatures.

But we're wired differently.

So we are going to bump heads and have challenges.

I'm going to I'm going to stea one of Matts kind of, key plays here, but like, yeah, what what makes you good at this?

Like, how did you get into this and what makes you uniquely, you know, good at this role?

Well, I'm a social worker by training, so I think my, my early years, my early career was spent helping kids and familie and working in a school facility for kid that had behavioral challenges.

From there, though, I moved into EAP employee assistance work, which is where we get introduced to companies and the unique challenges that happen.

You know, when we try to work together.

So I think for the better part of the last 30 years, I have been very passionate about helping people, you know, be their bes and show up as their best self.

And and that's when you change your name.

Hey.

That's right.

So fortify this.

But what your what wa your household like growing up?

I mean, your parents particularly a motive or the good listeners or the good communicators were the antithesis of that.

Were you the captain of your sports teams?

Did you have a a listening laboratory, a lemonade stand?

How did you know Sarah Turner?

I think I've always been interested in people.

I care about people.

My parents were both good parents.

I mean, they they I think what they did that helped me was they revealed their humanity.

And so if we could say you know, emotional intelligence and being effective at work is really about embracing your humanity, being vulnerable, accepting it, but also working through it.

And with it.

So I had parents who modeled that, namely, my da who started working a program, you know, recognize he had an addiction to alcohol and started working a program when I was very young.

And my mom, who was also a counselor, and she worked the Al-Anon program.

So she developed all kinds of skills, you know, for dealing with life and people.

So, brothers and sisters.

I have, I have one.

Well, I have two brothers, actually.

Yeah.

One I didn't meet until ten years ago.

You're kidding.

Last week.

Yeah.

So I have two brothers.

Two older brothers.

And I think I taught them everything they know.

Sure.

Absolutely.

And that's what they said.

We have that right here.

That's the quote, right?

That grew up in Toledo.

I understand that that both you and Gretchen went to school together.

Sort of.

Yeah, yeah, Notre Dame Academy.

Yep.

Were Eagles.

Go.

Eagles, Notre Dame.

You can tel by the quality of presentation.

So you use the topic is emotional intelligence.

You use that term a couple of times.

What is emotional intelligence.

And how can we give it to Gretchen?

I'm so glad you asked.

How do we gift it to her?

Gretchen already has it.

Thank you.

Be a great Sara.

Emotional intelligence.

It's a set of skills and abilities that help us deal with the demands and pressures of life, and we start forming those abilities from the time we arrive on the planet.

What's beautiful is we can develop these skills intentionally, and they can be, developed rather lifetime, therefor making it easier for us to cope with the increasing demands and pressures.

I think about how critical it is right now.

We have AI, we have the geopolitical landscape.

We have the economic.

Which is going great.

Isn't it, though?

We have all these things happening and we have become such a disregulated people, and we're so acclimate to the stress and the pressure and so emotional intelligence is unique to each person, but it's a set of skills and abilities that allow us, to be aware first and foremost and then to regulate.

And it's essential.

Does it it does it teach you or knowing what your level of emotional intelligence is, allow you to fall back on what you are, what what you what your level is to cope with things?

Is that is that a reason to know more about it?

Absolutely.

Is that just joining question identifying some of the things that I was talking about earlier.

Not at all.

Not at one point.

We were we were on the same page.

Exactly.

I mean, I could go back.

Yeah.

Is it just going to let you know?

Yeah.

That's out now that sounds like emotional intelligence.

That's right.

The rambling of that madman to my left.

Well, I think what you're asking, Gretchen, is, you know, can we leverage what we have?

Can can we use the emotional intelligence that we have?

And, yes, we should know what our strengths are.

Some of us are very self-aware, emotionally self-aware.

When we balance that with empathy we're as aware of people outside of us as we are of ourselves.

We can develop very healthy transactions with others.

Good interpersonal relationships.

When we are self-aware and recognize we have poor impulse control, I notice when I drive my car, I happened today on the way here.

Yeah.

You know, you get behind somebody who's driving very slow and the blood pressure starts to go up and the hands clench the steering wheel.

You know, it's not so much.

It's not just tha we should breathe and calm down.

We should be aware of what is happening.

Why is that?

Anxiety and that angst and anger rising up?

Well, I'm frustrated because I think everyone should go the speed I like to go.

So emotional intelligenc is also knowing your emotions.

But what you're saying to yourself about what you're experiencing.

If we change a lot of that, we'll have much better opportunity to regulate our emotions because they're normal.

Yeah.

Can I say one more thing about emotions, please?

We have them and they're not meant to be, you know, put on a shelf behind us.

We have them.

They are meant to be felt and experienced and felt all the way through.

But most of us have never learned how to do that.

But at work.

Yes.

So where where does that play in, in the workplace you have emotions, but the you're in this setting, right.

And so what what's the regulation there.

We think and we feel simultaneously all day.

So we need to be aware of both of our emotions and what we are saying to ourselves.

What are the thoughts we're having about what we're experiencing when we can get very, tactical and granular about recognizing what those are and being willing to shift, especially what we say to ourselves.

Well, that sucks.

That person is an idiot.

They shouldn't do that.

That's wrong.

Really, what we have i oftentimes unmet expectations.

We have a way that we view the world, and we think everything else should fit inside that.

And if it doesn't, we become frustrated.

So I think it's a combo.

It's a combo of knowin what you're saying to yourself and recognizing is this frustration, is this boredom?

Is this fear?

You sure?

Is there sadness?

And then if there is, by the way, you're having tha feeling at work, putting it away or stuffing it somewhere in your body only hurts you and it will leak ou or explode out somewhere else.

I think we're talking with Sarah Best with real good ventures.

A it's it's a work spring.

It's a wellness Wednesday presented by Work Spring.

We've talked with the folks from work Spring.

A few different times on the show about that, that balance or finding that line between, you know, crossing that line relationally as a, as an employer, as a manager.

At what point are we over acknowledging emotions in the workplace?

Is that even possible?

Right.

It's a proper.

Balance, yes for a. Professional atmosphere.

And, running your office or workplace is like a therapeutic office.

I think over acknowledging i different than overexpressing.

So where we have challenge when we overexpress our emotions or when emotions have hijacke our thinking in the situation.

So, we call that an amygdala hijacking where emotion has expression and it's harmful.

Yeah.

It's overrepresented.

So I think that emotion needs to be acknowledged.

Hey, I'm feeling frustrated, as, an access to better communication.

But it probably will take some time to cultivate a comfortability with that.

And if we could speak mor commonly in terms of emotions, we would give other people permission to also feel what they're feeling because they are feeling it.

Whether we believe we are not, it's shows up in our face, in our body language.

This makes sense.

That, absolutely.

I have a and maybe I won't be sophisticated enough to ask this appropriately, but I'm really curious about self-awareness.

It is a critical part of this but how critical should you be of your own ability to self diagnose or self analyze?

Well, what how do you know you know, your own baseline or why you behaving this way?

We adjust to some degree.

We adapt to some degree.

But you know, we are also very capable of deceiving ourselves to get the thing that we are wantin or to project blame potentially.

So self-awareness.

Yeah.

How do you handicap that to make sure that you're being healthy and appropriate and fair to others?

That's a great question, Matt.

I think you can test it out with people.

We should all kno that self-awareness is not just what we're feeling and experiencing ourselves being aware of that, but it's also being aware of how we impact others.

There's two parts to it.

Doctor Tasha York wrote a great book called insight, and in there she highlights researc that she did that says really?

We all think we're pretty self aware, but only 10 to 50% of us really are sure.

So we can always enhance our ability to tune inside.

But then check that out.

This is what I'm experiencing.

Is that what you're seeing from me?

Or when I do this or say this, what's the impact on you?

How do you walk?

You know, you and I are friends, on the side of this professionally.

But I have gotte the opportunity to work with you professionally, and it's been of great benefit to m and the institution I work with.

But how do you shut this off?

You're also a human being.

Yeah.

So when you're talking to, your family, you're walking to the grocery store.

How do you not identify something like this person is a blank or do you are you are the other consummate professional or how do you shut this off?

Because you're not responsible for healing everyone, right?

Or, you know, auditing a conversation you have.

Some people are just jerks.

So how does Sarah best walk through the world and not try to fix it?

Well I'm certainly not perfect at it.

I think that that's.

What you brother said.

We have that.

No, I think that, it's a work.

It's a constant work in progress.

Sure.

I also think that, you know, we're a whole person.

We're not just emotions.

We're ahead.

Heart, briefcase and baggage.

We like to say that it real good.

Ventures.

Head, heart, briefcase and baggage.

You know, the baggage is that lived experience that kind of hardwire our brain to think a certain way or perceive things a certain way.

And we have the opportunity to become aware of that.

Emotional intelligence is changing those neuronal pathways on purpose.

So it's changing your thinking, therefore getting a different feeling.

So I'm constantly, constantly working on this.

Yeah And it's it's believing for me.

Head heart briefcase.

The heart part for me values that we are one that if if I'm upset with you, I'm upset with me.

If there's something I see in you that, I can't tolerate, then there's something I'm not looking at in myself.

That's just me.

Yeah, but when we think about the whole person, emotional intelligence becomes, Really, a connection and a system of awareness of these things and a willingness to shift them.

Like, I could be wrong in fact, I am a lot.

One of our first interactions when when you and I first met was through the predictive index.

Can we talk about that for a couple minutes?

Because I, I still have this, like it's not a love hate relationship, but I am both fascinated and terrified of the predictive index because it did not ask nearly enough questions to identify every ounce of my being.

That sure.

Is that something a jerk would say?

Seems like there's no comment.

Okay.

That sounds like a yes.

Thanks a lot, Sarah.

Coming on to make a new test.

That's right.

So I made my own predictive index.

But I when I, when I took the, the predictive index, and read the report, I mean, I felt very seen and it was like, oh, this is who I am.

You talk about what that is.

Also, yes, the predictive index is a behavioral assessment.

The one you're speaking now, we call it the pie.

It's part of a talent optimization platform that helps organizations optimize their people, make better people decisions.

And it has a breadth of modules and cool things about it.

You took the behavioral assessment.

And let me just say this, we have emotions and we are emotionally active beings, but we also hav these natural behavioral drives.

So the Pi measures scientifically measure these natural behavioral drives so that we can understand what people need.

And therefore predict how they'll behave when those needs are met.

So we say drives, needs behaviors.

What's cool is you can't jus look at emotional intelligence in a vacuum.

You have to also understan the natural behavioral wiring.

Because if you think about it, emotional intelligence is how we adjust.

So I'm very dominant, very extroverted.

My icon is a microphone like that.

And, and I always say more than I should.

So adapting and adjusting for me is slowing down my pace.

That's impulse contro is being aware of my emotions.

And it's also, you know, dialing up my empathy so I can better read the other person and listen, because we do much better that way.

So the Pi helps you really diagnose scientifically what those drives are.

They're amazing and also helps us then understand when they're in default and whe they're in their biggest form, are they damaging potentially to you and other people?

I know I can be.

That's so interesting.

Kevin, what was yours?

Yeah, I was a maverick.

That would've been my.

I was going to say serial killer.

Yeah, well they're similar.

I actually, I guess I gave my, I had applied for a job, years ago and I gave my predictive index report to the employe saying they didn't ask for it, but I was like, just before you hire me.

Yeah, or ask me to apply.

That's great.

They also didn't.

Ask wasn't even a job available.

Admittedly, at all.

But I gave that saying, like I just before I go in.

It was a new role for the company.

Yeah.

Before I go into this role, I need you to know who I am.

Yeah.

And if there's something in my interview that convinced you otherwise.

Yeah.

This is who I am.

So.

And who you are.

Kevin is a guy who sees the big picture, moves fast, doesn't necessarily tend to the details, doesn't want to, and therefore you need somebody around you who supports that element.

That's me And you work with your people.

The detail guy.

Matt.

What's your word, sir?

What's yours?

Matt.

And then we got to wrap up.

I'm a promoter, okay?

I can see that.

Yeah.

And then Gretchen.

I've never taken.

It.

Yeah.

No.

Should you after say.

I would love that.

Yeah, I'm sure it's probabl genius or something like that.

Yeah.

There is that profile.

Yeah.

If people want more information on real good ventures, where can they find it?

Well, it certainly on the web.

We also have a podcast.

Yeah, the Boss Hole Chronicles.

Oh, it's so good.

Thank you.

Kevin, I appreciate your insights and your partnering with us on the podcast.

And we should be featuring you all one on one.

I think Gretchen really is a boss.

Hell, yeah.

Yeah, I don't know what that is, but thank you.

You know, I think that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm good.

Yeah.

Sarah Mathis, real good ventures.

Thank you so much.

Yeah.

You got to have you back on the program.

We need to put Gretchen.

Through.

A lot of, psychiatric work we.

Have said about doing these tests and then having someone come on in and do it, so we'll have to do it.

Okay.

All right.

Well, thank.

You.

So much Keep up the great work.

Thanks.

When we come back, Casey Greenwald with Michael Brown consulting, Michael Brown coaching.

We'll continue this conversation on a Wellness Wednesday presented by works.

Bring on the 490.

To me, community means connecting to others.

I'm Danny Miller and.

Welcome to the point.

I mean, yes, yes, we are a community committed to education.

Discover new ideas, dive into exciting subjects, and engage with the world around you.

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Cleaned up the neighborhood.

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The big E public media invites you to get out and play day.

Monday through Friday.

It's the 419 powered by W GTD with Matt Killam, Gretchen De Backer, I'm Kevin Mullen.

What can people expect on the show?

It's going to be an hour, a reminder of why this is a great place to live, work and play.

Where you come to watch, listen and learn.

Welcome back into the 419 Wellness Wednesday presented by Work Spring.

We're joined now by Casey Greenwald with Michael Brown Coaching.

Casey, great to see you again Thanks for being on the program.

Yeah, thanks for having me.

I'm very excited, very grateful.

Welcome.

So you and I met a couple of years ago at opening day.

Opening day.

And I feel like I just you just keep popping up all over the place, like, yeah, I can't get rid of you.

I tried.

Yeah, I was sharing with you guys earlier.

I worked at Cedar Creek for a long time in my early 20s, and then I worked at the Apple Store in the Franklin Park Mall for the past four years or so.

So I've seen the both of you walk through.

We met on opening day like we said, downtown Toledo.

So yeah, I was excited when I saw your names.

And then.

Gretchen.

Yeah, nice to meet you.

Less excited to see her.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So, like, exciting is that?

Yeah, I guess.

No, no, no, I can hear you voice, and, you know.

I want to.

I want to talk about Michael Brown consulting and we'll talk about, you know, the actual topic at hand here.

But like, you're originally from Toledo, so kind of walk me through childhood and give us a little bit of background.

Yeah.

Mustache is also from Toledo or.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Born and.

Raised.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay.

Yeah.

No, I grew up in Toledo, West Toledo area.

So I grew up in this weird neighborhood near Elmhurst Elementary.

Sure.

My neighbors were Washington local, but I was CPS.

Yeah, the side street was literally the border.

So I grew up going to Elmhurst I went to DeVault High School.

Did you?

Yep.

Nice.

Yeah, nice.

So I had a great experience.

I played basketball in high school.

I was really involved, after high school, I started my career while also going to school.

I worked at Cedar Creek Church.

They gave me a lot of opportunities to lead, to speak, to be responsible for things.

And, I learned a lot through that process.

My doctor, Michael Brown, through that as well, through different connections.

And then working at a church is complicated.

You're telling people what t believe and how to believe it.

So I stepped away from that.

And then I started workin at the Apple Store in the mall.

That was a great experience.

I learned a lot about teams, about relationships, and, a great team of people there, too, by the way.

They're awesome individuals.

And now I work at Highland.

I'm in the compliance department.

I read the law and make sure that.

We're gonna step away before people stop listening.

Just like you said.

So it's always always a natural public speaker.

Did your folks, were they outgoing?

How did you find this path?

It's a good question.

My mom worked at the blade, and she was in sales for a long time.

And she loves people.

Yeah, she was always.

We were laughing last night.

We were at dinner, and my mom was, like, on the phone, and my sister was on the phone when they were walking up, and I was like yeah, that's that's about right.

You're always, always talking to somebody.

Do you guys have dinner a lot together as a group?

Oh yeah.

Yeah.

That's awesome.

My mom and my sisters and myself.

Yeah, for sure, for sure.

The your mustache comes from your mom and dad's side.

Not my mom.

Okay.

Maybe her side.

I'm Italian, so.

Yeah, maybe that's the caring.

Yeah.

Mustache comes from that side of the family.

You never know.

To graduations on the Winter Olympics.

Let's let's.

Let's talk about Michael Brown consulting.

Who is who is Michael Brown an what is Michael Brown coaching?

Yeah.

So I met Michael, his son, and I grew up.

We were the same age.

His name is Justin.

Justin's a great guy, and we just became friends.

I really liked the person he was.

He cared a lot about becoming.

He cared a lot about, other people.

He was a great listener.

He was someone who was, quick to listen, slow to speak.

And so I, I was just attracted to that kind of personality.

Started hanging out with him, and he said, you got to meet my dad, which is a little odd.

I don't know about you guys, but I'm not necessarily very excite to introduce people to my dad.

If it happens, it happens, but not me.

It's the first thing, really.

All right, I love that.

Yeah.

Not me, but he he, he introduced me to his dad and I met Michael, and, he, you know, said a few things that caught my eye.

They were maybe a little provocative, or I was a young church kid, so he made some comments that I was like, oh, really?

You think that way?

And it expanded my thinking.

It made me star to think a little differently.

And I just spent more and more time around him.

He allowe me to be a part of this thing.

He did it.

We do still do at Bowling Green State University.

It's called Vanguard.

It's just a group of college guys and then become the best version of themselves.

It's a very open and honest conversation.

A lot of vulnerability, a lot of honest and just a bunch of young guys.

And I really love that.

I really liked the environment we were in, and I just kept showing up, actually, Michael asked me to be a part of it, and I just kept saying yes, which is why I'm here today.

Yes, yes.

Well, he'll be able to change that opinion after having this experience, but I think that's a particularly important time to find a healthy group of people to circle around.

Yeah, ask him good questions.

I know whenever people ask talk about tough times, I think people talk about teenage years and, you know, puberty and things of right, which are certainly an unmitigated nightmare.

But, you know, the tail end of college or when you cut the cord from college, they're like, well, who am I?

That's a rough go.

So I'm pleased to hear an interested, in and that experience, I'm sure was value to you and your buds.

We were talking with Sarah Best about, you know, emotional intelligence and got into a little bit of the workplace and workplace relationships piece.

I'm always fascinated about this.

And maybe it's you know, both me as an employee and as an employer, just thinking about finding that balance between being supportive of of your colleagues and your coworkers.

But also like still maintaining a healthy balance, like they say, you know, they say work life balanc doesn't exist, right?

Like that.

You'll never find them perfectly in balance.

It's mor about creating the boundaries, the healthy boundaries between them.

But I'm curious kind of what what your, your coaching approach to that is.

Yeah.

The first thing I'll say is you mentioned balance.

And I think sometimes I like to look at i more as like attention, like two things are true that exist at the same time.

And it's not so much trying to put more put the same amount of weigh into one as you put the other.

It's more being very aware.

You just talked about that, right?

The awareness of your emotions, the awareness of other people's emotions, the awareness of the situation that's at hand.

And I think that allows us to decide, is this a time to stick to the boundary that I put in place, or is this maybe a time to, listen more and connec more with the people that I or that I'm with that work and that I'm developing and maintainin and trying to cultivate healthy, trust filled relationships with, sometimes it's important to lean on those boundaries, right?

We don't want to be, th therapist for everybody at all.

We're not there to, you know, try to help them navigate these really complex, traumatic situations they may have in their life.

But at the same time, we're humans.

We bring our whole selves t work like we just talked about.

And so the ability to listen, to ask questions, to state the boundary that maybe exists for you in that situation, I think is really important.

So, yeah, a tension that exists and that's I find that tru with most things in life.

Right.

Two things are true at the same time.

And it's not a balance.

It's not about putting 50% here and 50% here.

It's about navigatin the ambiguity of life and going, oh, what is this call for?

What's how is this helpful?

How is this not helpful?

What's the scenario or an issue going on in a workplace that that someone would reach out to?

Michael Brown coaching.

What what is it that you would do.

Yeah.

So we work with a plethora o different types of industries.

Me personally, I work with a lot of fraternities.

And so the, the organizations are frat boys, and I work with their, like, their president.

And, there's a lot of conflict management there, but we also work with professional athletes, young professionals, CEOs.

I would say what's what's common is, most people don't know how to handle conflict in a healthy way.

They either take the bull by the horns and kind of push through it and just like how to see it, how it is.

Right?

I have to tell people what's true, or they avoid it and never deal with it.

Instead of, entering into those conversations with a level of trust, with the level of honesty, transparency, respect, all of those things are super important.

And with the goal of being, coming out the other end of it with a healthier, stronger relationship, maybe some next steps to get better, to grow.

But ultimately I think, again, we talked about earlier is not doing too much of one or the other, but being aware of what the situation calls for.

It.

How do you when you step into any situation, regardless if it's fraternity or professional athlete, what is the sort of diagnosis or information gathering phase look like?

Yeah, a lot of questions.

What I'm getting to know people, a lot of getting to know what their upbringing was because that shapes us.

Absolutely.

We can't avoid that.

Yeah.

It's like we can't avoid our emotions the way our brain is formed in the first 10 to 15 years of life is a lot of who we are, and so we have to become really aware of that.

I think it's also important to understand other people's perspective on teens because, you know, when you're talking or consulting with somebody, you're just getting their side.

You'r just getting their perspective.

And sometimes you can hear the gaps.

You can hear some of the things they may be speaking on.

You're like, oh, got it.

So your relationship with this individual who you're very frustrated with is not good.

So any coachin or any type of feedback you give them is going to be taken in a way where it's just to two opposing forces coming at each other, or maybe you're both just avoiding it.

You never talk about it.

You never address the conflict that's at hand.

And have you ever had to tell someone in a workplace that it's just not going to, they just need to move the person or it's just not going to work?

I mean, that's possibl that people just don't can't mix the relationships.

It's never going to.

Yeah we're leaving that on the show.

You can talk about that afterwards.

Yeah.

No, let's try that right now.

Yeah sure.

Absolutely.

There are definitely situations where the the best next step moving forward.

Maybe you've done you know, step one through five and really tried to work through and create a relationship.

Build some trust build som respect between two individuals.

Maybe it just doesn't work.

And that's okay too.

There's got to be experiences and we can use my own agency.

As an example, there is a healthy conflict.

Either you have a large agency, or your public facing.

So things have to rub for within you.

I worked for the Metro parks during the day.

And we are at our best when natural resources and, activation or operations rub in and both things.

But we need to honor equally.

They both have their own individual intrinsic value.

But how do you manage or coach people to to rub naturally?

Because from a natural resources perspective, everything should be greenspace and to some degree pristine.

Right or not impacted by human beings.

And the activation part right.

Reparations wants everything to be able to be seen and experienced.

So we want those two things to be in conflict.

Maybe not in the traditional sense, but how do you coach people through the fact that you're like, yes, this is when your agency or company is at its best.

When you two are at odds, how do you coach people through that or thinking that that's a natural dynamic?

Yeah.

So you're kind of saying that there's, you know, in the example you're giving, there's there's two things that seemingly.

Are you want them both to be true.

Yeah.

We're kind of saying, yeah, I think, number one, an awareness that both of those things can be true at the same time.

And if your team believes that, then you can enter into the conversation, not as opposing forces.

One person may be holding one value in another, person holding the other, but instead asking the question, how do we accomplish both of the things at the same time?

You mentioned this too, but in that conflict is where you will most of the time see the most growth for sure.

Absolutely.

So I'm thinking abou what are the things I would say to somebody or how would a coach them through?

It is, you know, some of those phrases, right.

Like in the messiness is where we're going to see the most growth.

Sure.

It feels uncomfortable.

Cool.

Lean into it, keep leaning into it.

Rely on the trust.

Rely on the relationships you've built with the people around you.

They want the best for you.

You want the best for them, and you both want the best for this organization.

You both want to see metro parks all over Toledo that are healthy, that families can go to, that are gree but also have resources to use.

Right.

So yeah, it's I think it's casting a vision as a leader.

But also being willing and able to step into those messy, hard conversations.

Yeah.

I have a we have a really great leader at Highlands, which is where I work.

My day job at all of our coaches work day jobs, which I think is super cool.

And he will often invite that conflict or invite who?

Yeah.

Who else is frustrated?

He'll say things like that at the end of the meeting.

All right.

We got five minutes left.

I'd love to hear something else someone's grumbling with or frustrated with.

Let's talk it out.

Let's hear it out.

How do you get from frustration to, to it being constructive?

That takes real leadership.

Absolutely.

Because at some point you need to have a space where particular people may have the ability to vent, but you don't have all day to your point And they're not all therapists.

Yeah.

So moving forward, like, okay, what you're saying now is just venting and.

It's and it's not a big leap to go from one person sharing something to everybody piling on the energy.

Now it's just.

Yeah, we've all been in that.

Meeting.

Right?

Yeah.

One person's like well and then another person's like, well sure.

Yeah.

I you have to give people space to, to vent and to speak.

I work for.

Myself.

Okay.

Perfect.

Yeah.

Because everyone else quit, and I say, you ask yourself.

Sometimes people quit.

That's okay.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I think inviting it is important.

Acknowledging I like the phrase what I'm hearing.

You say is I think, is it really helpful phrase and just life to say back to people, but especially in the workplace environment, when you're a leader and you're leading a group of people, people just want to be heard.

Yeah.

I just want.

To know that you're you're listening to them.

You're acknowledging the things that that, that they're experiencing.

Because the reality is when you're a boss or a leader, you're probably 4 or 5 steps disconnected from the everyday work.

So your ability to actively listen and make people feel, not just feel, but know that you're understanding what's going on.

So what do you.

At the risk of over pivoting here, I do want to talk a little bit about communication in this space.

Right.

People communicate differently.

And both in style, in in mechanism.

Right.

Even within the three of us.

Right.

We joke that like, Matt has never returned a text message in his life.

But like some.

Texted you once.

Actually.

Yeah.

He'll he'll get two dimensional, you know, but, like, you know, people people prefer text.

People prefer email, people for phone call.

You know, zoom calls are now it's like, hey, everything's got to be a zoom call.

And I default to like, hey, you want to hop on a zoom call or like, I'll just call you.

I was like.

Kevin, I'm your wife.

Yeah, that's right, that's right.

But like, what's the what's the balance?

And how do you find that?

And, and how do you prioritize what's best for me versus what's best for the person I'm trying to talk to you.

Great question.

Yeah.

I mean, I think as a leader, if you're leading a team or managing a team, it's your responsibility to know the preferences and to know, some of the things that the, the way your team works and what makes them tick, but also what their preferences ar when it comes to communication.

I'm someone who I like to overcommunicate.

I like to spell things out in an email, maybe even give you a follow up call afterwards and say, hey, did you get my email?

Some people respond with two word sentences.

That's right.

And those people are geniuses.

Geniuses.

Or if you're like me on the other end, you're like, do they hate me?

Like, did they even di they even listen to what I said?

Yeah, that's what we're thinking on the other side of that.

Yeah.

But back to the initial question is, is how do you navigate the different preferences of methods of communication?

Or, I think that methods of anything.

Right.

And I think that's knowing your team, we talked a little bit before I was on about emotional intelligence and understanding what makes your team tick.

What they get excited about, what frustrates them, and acknowledging.

Maybe you have three people o your team who hate zoom calls, but a boundary you've create is we're going to do zoom calls because that's the thing that works the best.

Having conversation with those three people who hate zoom calls and navigati listening to them an going, why is that frustrating?

I hear you.

Would it be okay if we did a zoom call once a week on Mondays at 8 a.m.?

Right.

You're setting that boundary, setting that expectation.

You're having that conversation.

It seems simple.

But a lot of the stuff and a lot of the stuff we do when it comes to coaching, it's not complex.

It's just hard.

It's just the hard things.

And I think that's true about life, too.

Yeah, we're talking with Casey with Michael Brown coaching.

If people want more information on Michael Brown coaching, where can they find it?

DMV coaching.com.

We also have a podcast.

It's called three words.

Three words.

That's simple.

We do like a ten minute podcast every wee where we talk about three words that will help you become the best version of yourself.

So that's a long time just to deliver three words.

A real long words.

They're really.

Long.

Words.

That's true.

Casey, thank you so much.

I appreciate it.

When we come back, we'll be joined by Deb Ayres with the Avalon Foundation.

Today is rare disease day.

I think I got that right.

Yep.

We'll find out officiall on the other side of this break.

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Welcome back into the 419 A Wellness Wednesday edition presented by Work Spring.

We're joined now by Deb Ayres with the Avalon Foundation.

Deb, thank you for joining us.

I'm so excited to be here.

Good morning.

Thank you for coming in.

Who is Avalon an what is the Avalon Foundation?

The Avalon foundation.

Our mission is to help families that are challenged with the rare disease diagnosis or possibly undiagnosed.

But we're workin with the rare disease community or those affected by it.

Avalon happens to be my daughter.

She started this organization when she was ten years old.

And so we're going over nine years strong now.

And, we also have parlayed thi into a youth leadership program in the Toledo area.

What is the definition of a rare disease?

Rare disease is, somethin that's diagnosed 1 in 200,000.

It's, you know, rare.

But the interesting part about it is rare diseases affect 1 in 10 people and over 50% of those are kids.

So 90% like, wrap your head around all these numbers.

If you're under the age of 18 and you get diagnosed with something, 90% of those things are rare disease because it's really not common for young people to be getting, you know, diagnosed with things.

But we have such a, you know, so man things are connected to genetics and we have so many anomalies coming through, generation by generation.

So we're seeing an uptick in all of these things.

And so it's interesting becaus right now, as medicine advances and we are coming up with treatments for some of these things, they're starting to test the generations ahead of them and the siblings.

And they're finding that it's, you know, it's spreading a little bit more common than we thought.

I remember hearing.

The phrase rare disease isn't rare.

Yeah, right.

Like that.

I think that's an interesting perspective because, you know, we've talked about this even even with my own health journey.

Right.

You feel alone, but knowing that you're not right.

And maybe the individual disease you may you have may be rare, but the reality i you're in a community that's all navigating this together.

Exactly.

Even the undiagnosed.

So I love the two, guests you have had before.

You bring in Sarah talking about emotional intelligence, and then you have Casey talking about coaching and that's essentially what the Avalon Foundation does for rare families.

So we're bringing in this idea of helping the families navigate the emotional journey of all of this so that they don't feel alone, to your point, and then coaching them so that they understand how if we can stabilize a family emotionally wrap their head around the diagnosis, they're going to do so much better in treatment.

A lot of these treatments, like my daughter's, was incredibly painful.

The treatment for hypo Fast fo Tasia, which is her diagnosis, was a daily injection that felt like hot lava under the skin and cause tremendous amount of, you know, you just you dealt with a whole nother nasty set of symptoms that came along with the treatment.

And so parents are left wondering, what the heck do you do?

How do you navigate all of this?

And how do you tak care of yourself through that?

Because you may have other children.

Sure.

You know, to manage and you have your life to manage and your work to manage, and your life is falling apart for your child.

And so it's falling apart for you.

With all of that you're going through.

Yeah.

Why did you and Avalon decide to take this off?

That was gonna be my question.

How do you say you're very positive?

We're meeting for the first time, but, I nevertheless, I think on of our one of our three guests.

But how do you keep the faith in this?

How do you keep the energy level in this going up?

It wa it was so it's it's a challenge.

Sure.

Yeah.

You got to be tapped into your why and your passion.

But when we first started Avalon, they had, for her particular treatment.

It was a really rough, like, 90 days.

It's hard for a kid to stick to something for 90 days without getting results.

And her particular drug took about three months before you got results.

But she went from living part time in a wheelchair to the volleyball court in four months.

But that, you know, had never run or jumped and was able to start playing CYO sports.

Yeah, so that was very exciting.

When she got to Kevin wa just recently banned from CBS.

Oh, not yet, not yet.

It' it's it's.

Getting it's coming.

There are your bow tie it all up.

Yeah.

Oh that's why you got suspended.

Yeah.

He was wearing only that.

They've had bow.

Ties.

Oh yeah.

We got to the other side of that channel and and that's when Avalon said.

I can' imagine how other kids do this.

I have, you know, parents that are educated and know how to do all of these things.

What about the kids that don't?

I want to do something to help.

But at.

Ten, I mean, that's an incredible.

Emotional.

That's right I mean, if you think of other.

Matter like she's she's kind of a force of.

Her own.

She's incredible.

Yeah she is and but I will say while my daughter's incredible I never want to pivot from that.

I think all kids are.

And I think if you give them the right set of circumstances to succeed, that's what our youth leadership program is about.

And I think when you have kids that are facing these medical challenges at a young age, it sets them up with a whole different set of challenges that develop different skills.

They develop a lot of empathy, compassion, you know they develop a lot of management skills and leadership skills, the way they have to manag their own medical circumstances.

They grow up real fast.

Can we.

Talk?

We're talking with Deb Ayres with the Avalon Foundation.

I want to talk a little bit about, like, the tactical thing that you guys are doing today.

Yes, but real quick, we've talked about Avalon just for for folks that, you know, they've kind of heard this journey.

Where's Avalon and how's she doing today?

She she's doing well today.

She's, in her junior year at GW University, out in DC.

Planning to take her Lsat in April and, heading off to, T14 law school at some point in the near future.

And she's, all around the country doing.

Debate all around the world doing debate.

Yes.

So she found her thing was debate started freshman year in high school.

Found a deep passion for social justice debate.

She's doing transatlantic debate now.

And she's a debate coach for a school similar to Saint John's.

Out in DC.

And, those are probably my favorite phone calls.

She calls and says, it's just so amazing to watc my students accomplish so much so she's.

Yeah, yeah.

It's exciting.

She has a bright future.

She manages tough times every day.

You know, she gets out past a kind of decide what she can accomplish for the day and how she's going to do that.

But there's very little that keeps her down.

There's a couple sides to the organization.

We can all learn a lot from that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's a couple sides of the organization.

One of them is the pain boxes.

Yes.

Talk to me about what those are.

And I think we can all kind of.

We'll figure out where they came from.

That's how the whole thing started.

Sorry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

With golf toward Kevin.

Yes.

Yes, most people do.

Yeah.

He gives me a regular check up in the morning.

Go ahead.

The pain box started, Avalon, when she was going through her tough time.

Grandma Karen, who is an R.N., came over and said, you know, Deb, we've got to make sur Avalon maintains this treatment.

It's the difference between you bearing her, her bearing you.

So, you know, there is no option to say no, because that's what Avalon was saying.

And, so she gave her a box of incentives.

Simple, right?

Parents do incentive stuff all the time.

How?

We still get gold stars for going potty on time.

Do you get that mat?

Well, I haven't.

I heard Kevin gives you a gold star.

He hasn't done.

Haven't received a. Yeah, I'm going right now.

I buy it for myself.

Yeah that's right.

But the bribery word bribery works.

And so, that became the pain box and grandma said, we're going to call it the pai box because we're not going to, you know, get around the fact this thing is painful.

We're going to acknowledge it.

You're going to build resilience.

You're going to build courage.

You're going to you know you're going to develop yourself through this challenge.

And we're going to call it pain Box.

And that's when Avalon said, I want to do pain boxes for everybody else.

And she gathered her friends together and they started the Avalon.

Foundation.

Dealing with pain.

She's done all of this.

Yes.

Yeah.

How about that?

Yeah.

You don't want to get into that story.

That's that's off camera.

Dealing with all of this, you know, builds such incredible characte and resilience and all of that.

And I know that that youth leadership development is a big piece of this organization as well.

Let's talk about what you know.

Casey 4K is Casey for Casey for kids caring for kids.

And so Casey for kids caring for kids.org is was our domain or is our domain how we got started with that.

And that gives a little bit more description as to what we do.

And you know, we have a new, cohort of young people that are our leaders now.

They actually are it's designed so that they're the advisor board to our board of directors.

So they really run the show, and the kids last year are the first two.

The kids that weren't related to Avalon, you know, didn't relate to her story or know her.

And they came around and said, we we need to be connecte to patients in a different way.

Let's stick with the mission.

But we want to do something locally.

And they came up with this idea and we ended up Toledo Rotary funded it, and we started the gearbox program.

And that's going into local hospitals and helping kids that are undiagnosed or have rare diseases that have to stay extended in a hospital.

So this is like the kids continue to lead the way.

And we teach, yo know, we're built on the pillars of leadership, compassion, commitment and contribution.

And that's what we want them t take away from this leadership.

And you have an event coming up on February 28th.

Can you tell us a little bit about that?

We do.

That's our annual brunch.

It's the the young leaders are the ones that, you know, create the program and do the education, but they're ther to celebrate Rare Disease Day, which is always the last day of February.

Kevin, I was a little early.

I was a little early.

For disease month.

He likes to celebrate the whole month.

It is a global celebration.

So you're going to see stuff from all you know.

If you tap into rare disease, it's all over the country, all over the world.

And so we say show your stripes.

Thank you for sharing your story.

I wore a bow tie and I wore stripes on star.

Yeah.

You will.

You got checkers?

Those are several stripes.

Yes, Francis.

I'd let you immediately.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm wearing my zebra, which is the symbol for rare disease.

Okay.

And, because.

No, no zebra ever has the same stripes.

They're all different.

Just like all of our rare kids and rare families.

And yet when we run in a herd, we feel together.

That's true.

All right, let's let's do this.

I know you brought some gifts.

I'll get to that a minute.

I want to make sure we get in.

Gretchen.

Wacky quiz.

Okay, four rapid fire questions for me.

Gretchen is going to ask you for your favorite thing.

And maybe they ask you for nine words that describe Toledo.

Okay, if you could be your own country, what would it be called?

Oh.

Country.

What would it be?

Compassionate state.

I love it, I love.

It.

What's your most used emoji?

Praying hands.

What's your favorite season?

Spring.

And what's your favorite thing to do on a rainy day?

Binge watch something with my cat.

My husband.

That's a good day.

That's a good day.

What is your number one?

What you consider to b the best thing or your favorite thing about Toledo or the region?

Two things the people I love are here.

So that's, you know, kind of a give me.

Other than that, the mother tree at Wildwood.

Yeah.

I grew up, like, hanging out with her all the time.

And I'm grateful that I'm there during the end of her life with us.

So.

Yeah.

Mothe tree.

Well, I love that answer.

All right, nine words.

What do you do with me?

I'm ready.

Okay Fire away.

Fire at nine words.

Serendipitous.

Okay.

Affordable.

Midwest friendly.

Yes.

It's hyphenated.

Yep.

Got it.

Best Metroparks.

Thank you.

School.

Family.

Crossroads.

Entrepreneur's crossroads.

The movie with Britney Spears?

No.

Okay.

Crossroads.

As in, we have Amtrak charter I-75, you know like it's infrastructure for 75.

And Britney.

Spears and the movie Britney Spears and the movie Britney.

And neither of us.

I can't do it.

Yeah.

And then I'm going to say Goldilocks because it's just the right size.

Love.

That's so good, dad.

Thank you.

All right.

Great.

Yes, yes.

Brought us a gift which is a requirement of ours.

Yes.

Well, I've been listening.

And as I said, I like to talk back at you.

Go talk back with you guys.

Is.

It mostly telling us to stop talking?

No, it's.

Mostly referring to, like, previous jokes we've made about each other in other episodes.

Yeah.

But I do know the tradition of needing to fill this bookcase.

Yes.

I'm grateful to be here in the beginning of the year.

Congratulations Thank you guys for being here.

It is such a fun show to listen to and watch.

I did a little watching in Florida, and then I di a little listening on the plane.

But I brought it for you guys.

Oh, I oh is our zebra.

She was stuffed by kids, so she's handmade with love.

No, the kids stuff these, and then they send them to our patients and they have the little Avalon Foundation with their logo on it.

And our logo.

Kids are all wearing their zebra stripes, and we put a bow tie on them just for Kevin.

Kevin.

Yeah, that's so great, I love it.

Thank you so much.

So for at least rare disease, I think he's got a hang up.

I got to hang out up there.

Yeah.

This is yeah.

This is amazing hope.

Thank you so much.

And you also brought us some magnets.

Yes.

And, just remind everyone again about the, Rare Disease Day annual brunch and auction.

And yes.

That is September 28th at Sylvania Country Club.

February 28th.

Fact tonight.

What is that?

I see?

I'm way or at least.

Yeah, I. Know.

February.

Yeah.

February 28th.

Saturday, February 20th.

It's a brunch.

I know that we have the YWCA event in the evening, which is great.

We're a brunch, so we're in the afternoon.

We're at Sylvania Country Club.

The kids have a great panel.

We're featuring, some wonderful speakers, including Isabella Wike, John Bentley, and Julia Hage.

Like page.

Julia Hage is our M.C.

for the show.

That's great.

So we're excited.

Where can people find more information?

Casey for k.us is the easiest way.

Casey for us.

You also have the best purse bingo in town.

Purse bingo at this event?

Not at.

This.

No, that is already scheduled.

But we want.

Yeah, I've already made Kevin keep it on his calendar.

What is it?

It's October.

Bingo.

If for purses.

I want to Make sure I say the right date.

That is October 9th.

It's such a good time.

Friday, October 9th.

I bet to be a part of it, the last couple of years.

It's a great time.

All right, Deb Ayres with the Avalon.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

So much.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Gretchen, when we come back, we'll wrap up this Wednesday edition of the 419 Wellness Wednesday, presented by Works Spring.

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Welcome back to the 419, a Wellness Wednesday edition presented by Work Spring.

That.

Show flew by, I thought.

Not for me.

Yeah, I was paying attention.

Well, that's the definition of emotional.

Intelligence, right?

Thank you.

It's called.

A wrap up.

Yeah.

That's right.

No, no, no, I, I appreciate that, you know, both with, with Sarah and with Casey, the conversation was really more about like, awareness and acceptance than, like, massaging or like avoiding or anything like that.

It was like, be aware that you have these emotions.

Yeah.

You're not supposed to massage people at work.

Oh that's right.

Okay What is that what you learned?

That's not what I meant.

Oh, okay.

I meant like, but, like trying to, like you know, avoid situations.

Yes.

It's like, that's not going to work.

Let's acknowledge that it exists.

Acknowledge that, you know, you have emotions.

And here's the way you want to be communicated with.

And here's the way that you want to be, you know, led or disagreed with them.

So I enjoyed.

Every one of those guests could have had been the whole show.

Yeah.

You're right.

I mean, there was a lot of thanks for that, Gretchen.

Well the beautiful thing is we've got a lot more shows to go.

That's right.

So do we ever.

Yeah, we're going to.

We're going to have them back on some more.

If you missed any part of today's show, there's three great opportunities for you to enjoy it.

7 a.m.

on YouTube, channel, 3 p.m.

on FM 91 and Toledo, Brian Defiance and Lima and 6 p.m.

on channel 30.4 GTI connects thanks to Sarah Best, Casey Greenburg, Greenwald, and Deb Ayres for joining us on the program tomorrow.

It is our toledo.com community calendar driven by Tara.

We'll take a look at some of the coolest things coming up on the weekend.

And throughout the month.

And we'll also talk a little bit about the Olympics as well.

Okay.

So thank you so much for joining us.

We'll see you back here tomorrow on the 419 powered by ZTE and presented by our friends at Retro Wealth Management.

The 419, powered by GTD is made possible in part by supporters like you.

Thank.