(tranquil music) (typewriter dinging) (typewriter clicking) - I'am Renee Watson, and this is "Skin & Bones."

"Skin & Bones" is about Lena who is on the eve of getting married.

She's 40 years old.

She lives in Portland, Oregon.

And the book is about what one generation passes down to the next in regards to beauty, love, forgiveness, and faith.

And I got the idea from watching a child mimicking a conversation that she overheard, and all the adults in the room were like, "Where'd you get that language from?"

And it was very clear that she had gotten it from the adults that were in her life.

And so I just thought, "Huh, what are young people listening to and hearing?

And what are they picking up from us, and how can we be more aware, and intentional about what we're passing down to them?

- All the women in her life are a source of love, but also a source of conflict.

Can you talk more about that?

- Well, relationships are complicated and I really wanted to explore that friction between sticking with it.

When you love someone, but they've disappointed you, they've hurt you, how do you forgive and have difficult conversations, and not just cancel people?

Or say, "Well, we're no longer friends.

You're not in my life anymore because we disagree on something."

- You say in the book, "We're told to forgive, but they don't teach us how."

- Yeah.

- I mean, how do we forgive?

- Forgiveness isn't a one-time thing.

Like, it's something you have to nurture and grow, and that I can say, "I forgive you."

And then I gotta do the work to actually forgive you.

And that's hard work.

So I think it includes listening and grace and being honest that you're hurt.

I think sometimes, "I don't care, whatever, I'm fine."

And you're not fine.

And that's okay to not be fine.

And I think the person who's done the offense also has to practice patience, and understanding that I'm not the mistake that I made, but I also need to give this person time to forgive me and to heal.

Healing takes time.

And so I think you can forgive someone, and still be in a process of healing, and that that's just a lot of work.

- This has been fantastic.

I could talk to you all day.

- Thank you.

- Thank you so much for being here.

- Thanks for having me.

- And thank you for watching "A Word on Words."

I'm JT Ellison.

Keep reading.

(typewriter dinging) - [Renee] Local history is important to understand what happened before I arrived and what do I wanna do now that I'm here?