[ Indistinct conversations ] [ Piano plays down-tempo, heavy tune ] ♪♪ Blythe: Good evening, dear friends, and welcome to tonight's musical extravaganza.

Stephanie Blythe is Blythely Oratonio.

Yes, in mere moments, "American Songbook" will bring to the stage what the world needs now more than anything -- another tenor.

[ Laughter ] But as we all know, tenors are fragile, sensitive creatures, so please turn off all your electronic devices and refrain from recording of any kind.

Thank you.

♪♪ Now, lean back, take a deep, cleansing breath... [ Inhales and exhales deeply ] ...get comfortable, and prepare yourselves [voice deepens] to expect the unexpected, to enter a world that is strangely familiar but blissfully odd.

Oh, yes, get ready for Blythely Oratonio, the man, the myth, the messenger, because tonight none shall sleep!

♪♪ [ Applause ] ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Laughter ] ♪♪ [ Singing "Nessun Dorma" in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Laughter ] ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ [ Cheers and applause intensify ] ♪♪ ♪♪ [ A capella ] ♪ I want to break free ♪ [ Cheers and scattered applause ] ♪ I want to break free ♪ ♪ I want to break free from your lies ♪ ♪ You're so self-satisfied ♪ ♪ I don't need you ♪ ♪ I've got to break free ♪ ♪ God knows ♪ [ Piano begins playing ] ♪ God knows ♪ ♪ I want to break free ♪ ♪ I've fallen in love ♪ [ Laughter and cheers ] ♪ I've fallen in love for the first time ♪ ♪ And this time I know it's for real ♪ ♪ I've fallen in love ♪ ♪ God knows ♪ ♪ God knows I've fallen in love ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] ♪ It's strange but it's true ♪ ♪ Hey, I can't get over the way you love me like you do ♪ ♪ But I have to be sure when I walk out that door ♪ ♪ Oh, how I want to be free, baby ♪ ♪ Oh, how I want to be free ♪ ♪ Ohhhhhhhhhhhh ♪ ♪ How I want to break free ♪ [ Tempo quickens ] ♪ But life still goes on ♪ ♪ I can't get used to living without, living without ♪ ♪ Living without you by my side ♪ ♪ I don't want to live alone ♪ ♪ Yeah!

♪ ♪ God knows, got to get by on my ♪ [ Singing in Italian ] ♪ Oh, baby, can't you see?

♪ [ Singing in Italian ] ♪ I've got to break free ♪ [ Singing in Italian ] ♪ I've got to break ♪ [ Singing "La donna è mobile" in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] Ah, to hell with it.

[ Music swells ] ♪ I've got to break ♪ ♪ Freeeeeeee ♪ ♪ Free, freeeeee ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

For the two of you who don't know me... [ Laughter ] ...my name is Blythely Oratonio, raconteur, tenorissimo, hailed by "Opera News" as the voice of the 23rd century and by Spear Carrier #35 as the ride of a lifetime.

[ Laughter ] While we're all standing here admiring me...

I was meant to say "each other," but I just couldn't help it in that moment.

While we're all admiring one another, why don't you give it up for my band, The Fluffers?

Yes!

[ Cheers and applause ] The Fluffers!

Yes.

As the name implies, they're multi-talented.

They'll keep you up all night.

[ Laughter ] And here, let me introduce you to Birdie and Birdie.

They're my emotional support birdies.

[ Laughter and applause ] Yes.

They see to all my needs with consent.

And speaking of consent, it's a joy to have you all here at the "American Songbook" series.

Yes, welcome.

And what better way to welcome all of you than to sing some music by some great American composers, like, uh, Verdi and Puccini and, of course, Queen.

[ Laughter and applause ] [ Chuckles ] Now, you will notice that, well, this series concerns itself with things that are popular, popular American song.

So I'm sure you can understand why I was a little confused when I got the call.

[ Laughter ] Because, well, most people know me as an opera singer.

Yes.

But... it may come as a shock to some of you, but opera is not considered popular by many people.

[ Laughter ] In fact, some people say that opera is dead.

Audience member: Oh!

Yeah.

Yes, opera is dead.

Leoncavallo, dead.

Donizetti, morto.

Bizet, morte.

Mozart und Wagner, auch tot.

Und Handel, pronounced "Handle."

Let's all say it together, shall we?

All: "Handle."

Still dead.

[ Laughter ] Now, obviously opera's not dead.

[ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] [ Laughter ] But don't you think that some of it should be?

[ Laughter ] Inaccessible opera, dead.

Safe opera, morte.

Opera written 200 years ago by a man about a woman still being performed on the same sets with the same staging and the same costumes... tot.

[ Laughter ] Now, don't get me wrong.

I love opera.

Who doesn't love a good old "Let me warm your tiny, cold hands" number?

[ Laughter ] Who doesn't get jazzed listening to a soprano sing herself to death, literally, for 15 minutes on a Kool-Aid-stained Vera Wang bedsheet?

[ Laughter ] But that's all been done, to death.

And I'm not dead.

And you're not dead.

And they're not dead.

So tonight we're only going to sing living opera.

Opera that is breathing, moving, changing, sweating into its décolletage.

[ Laughter ] And we're going to start with an aria that I used to sing when I was a mere slip of a thing.

Fluff me, Drew!

[ "Jessie's Girl" into plays on guitar ] You know... [ Cheers and applause ] ...when I was a kid, my father was a great jazz musician, and he used to, uh -- well, he played all the time in the house, and it encouraged me to play the flute.

So I thought I would be a great flautist in the style of Jean-Pierre Rampal, James Galway, Jethro Tull.

Unfortunately, my dad didn't think much of singers, and the only people he thought more stupid than singers were guitar players.

Sorry, Mike.

So when my dad would go off to a gig, I'd go into my bedroom, stand on the bed, and I'd hold my mother's hairdryer like a microphone -- absolutely true.

It would singe my lips a little, but it gave great wind effect.

[ Laughter ] ♪♪ And I was rockin' fuckin' hair.

And I did two stupid things -- play the air guitar and sing.

Went something like this.

♪ Jessie is a friend ♪ ♪ Yeah, I know, he's been a good friend of mine ♪ ♪ But lately something's changed that ain't hard to define ♪ ♪ Jessie's got himself a girl and I want to make her mine ♪ ♪ And she's watching him with those eyes ♪ ♪ And she's loving him with that body, I just know it ♪ ♪ Yeah, and he's holding her in his arms late, late at night ♪ You know, when I was a kid, I wasn't very good at keeping secrets.

So I went to school, and I told all my friends, "I don't want to be a flautist anymore.

I identify as Rick Springfield!

♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ Where can I find a woman like that?

♪ That's what I told all my friends -- that I wanted to be Rick Springfield.

They didn't believe me.

No, they looked at me with their mouths agape.

Not only was it stupid for me to want to sing, I didn't have the right voice for it.

I was too loud.

The task was too large.

In fact, I was too big to be a rock star.

"Why don't you try opera instead?"

Fuck you!

[ Laughter and cheers ] ♪ I'll play along with the charade ♪ ♪ There doesn't seem to be a reason to change ♪ ♪ You know, I feel so dirty when they start talking cute ♪ ♪ I wanna tell her that I love her ♪ ♪ But the point is probably moot ♪ Moot!

[ Laughter ] 12 points, Mr. Springfield.

[ Laughter and applause ] Incredible word.

So then I thought, "Maybe I'll do something really stupid.

Maybe I'll become an opera singer and I'll use my big voice as my shield and buckler.

And I'll own my big, beautiful, magnificent, voluptuous, Junoesque, glorious body."

[ Cheers and applause ] So I studied.

And I practiced.

And again... [ Opera style ] ♪ And he's watching her with those eyes ♪ ♪ And she's loving him with that body, I just know it ♪ ♪ And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night ♪ ♪ You know ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ Where can I find a woman like that?

♪ ♪ Lii-iii-iiike ♪ ♪ Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ Where can I find a woman ♪ ♪ Where can I find a woman like that?

♪ Now it's time for the bridge.

In opera, we don't have bridges.

We just have hours of fucking recitative.

[ Rock style ] ♪ And I'm looking in the mirror all the time ♪ ♪ Wonderin' what she don't see in me ♪ ♪ I've been funny, I've been cool with the lines ♪ ♪ Ain't that the way love's supposed to be?

♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Opera style ] ♪ Where can I find a woman like that?

♪ [ Laughter ] I know.

I've been all over the world.

And I've sung in some of the most lauded houses -- Paris, London, Helsinki, Schenectady, Skaneateles, Intercourse, Camden, Philadelphia, New York.

And I've sung with some of the most beautiful women -- Renée Fleming, Susan Graham, and that glorious, glorious goddess, Stephanie Blythe.

[ Cheers and applause ] But still deep in my heart, ♪ You know ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ I wish that I had Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ I want Jessie's girl ♪ ♪ Where can I find ♪ ♪ A woman like that?

♪ [ Soft piano music ] [ Laughter ] You know, I think we've all known each other long enough now that I can ask you this question.

Have you ever been in the middle of some daily task?

I don't know, something like, uh, tweezing or -- or holding a high "D" while carrying an expiring soprano in your arms, something mundane like that, and suddenly you ask yourself, what am I doing with my life?

[ Laughter ] What -- What even is this?

Is this living?

Am I being vital?

Who am I anyway?"

And this is not about being popular.

I don't need to be popular.

But am I relevant?

Am I relevant?

You know, the other day I was in my dressing room... ...on the toilet... [ Laughter ] ...having a think, as you do, thinking about those big shifts in life, and in me.

You know -- You know, the ones that really take the air out.

Those are the most exciting and thrilling shifts of all, like turning 50, realizing that your voice has changed.

Or, like the other day, I was in the middle of coaching a wonderful young singer in a role that I used to sing quite well and no longer can.

And there you are, sitting in your dressing room with your Twitter and Gram and your Book of Faces... [ Laughter ] ...desperately launching photographs into the virtual void... [ Laughter ] ...hoping that there'll be somebody out there that gives you the thumbs up... ...to help you and your art form live and breathe a little longer.

And all the while, continents are on fire... ...nationalism is on the rise, and there are people protesting all over the world to deaf ears.

And you sit in front of your mirror with your painted face and sing.

[ Piano plays ] -[ Singing in foreign language ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Laughs ] ♪♪ [ Continues singing in foreign language ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ Isn't it rich?

♪ ♪ Are we a pair?

♪ ♪ Me here at last on the ground ♪ ♪ You in mid-air ♪ ♪ Send in the clowns ♪ ♪ Isn't it bliss?

♪ ♪ Don't you approve?

♪ ♪ One who keeps tearing around ♪ ♪ One who can't move ♪ ♪ Where are the clowns?

♪ ♪ Send in the clowns ♪ [ Singing "Vesti La Giubba" in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ Just as I'd stopped ♪ ♪ Opening doors ♪ ♪ Finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours ♪ ♪ Making my entrance again with my usual flair ♪ ♪ Sure of my lines ♪ ♪ No one is there ♪ [ Singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ Don't you love farce?

♪ ♪ My fault, I fear ♪ ♪ I thought that you'd want what I want ♪ ♪ Sorry, my dear ♪ ♪ But where are the clowns?

♪ ♪ Send in the clowns ♪ ♪ Don't bother ♪ ♪ They're heeeeere ♪ ♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Cheers and applause continue ] Those are my bad days.

[ Laughter ] And we all have them, don't we?

And don't we all face them just about the same way?

You stand up, you put on your big-boy mascara and your gilded headdress, and you walk through some AD's staging of, uh, "Trovatore" or "Traviata" or some chestnut like that, and then you take your bow and you go home... heat up a Hot Pocket... [ Laughter ] ...get lost in a YouTube algorithm, maybe watch a little late-night infomercial.

Then you call it a day.

Rinse and repeat.

You know, when I first met opera, I had just spent a year majoring in marijuana.

[ Laughter ] And I was passing with flying colors, man.

Really.

That's all I could see.

Just a load of flying colors.

I was so high.

Why don't you ask me how high I was?

Audience and band: How high were you?

I was so high that I went from a grade point average of 3.0 to a 1.5 in one semester.

[ Band plays a lick ] I was so high.

Audience and band: How high were you?

I was so high that the first time I ever got stoned on a gravity bong, I got the munchies real bad.

So I went down to the student union where there was a big plate-glass window, and I stood there in front of it, and I felt my body refracting off of the glass.

It was raising up into the air, and the only way that I could get myself down was to s-s-s-shake my body as fast as I could.

The next day, I couldn't even turn my head.

[ Band plays a lick ] I was so high.

Audience and band: How high were you?

I was so high that one day I was walking down the stairway in my dorm and ran directly into the president of Christian InterVarsity.

I looked him in the eye and I said, "I am so high."

[ Laughter ] That's how high I was.

That high.

[ Band plays a lick ] But, you know, opera took care of me.

She grounded me.

She took away my gravity bong and she showed me a new way to get high.

She showed me discipline.

And eventually she paid my bills.

She did my laundry.

She paid for my therapist.

She showed me what it was like to be human, to rage and to lust, to mourn, to weep, to shout for joy, to storm a castle, to murder a lover, to die from tuberculosis.

[ Laughter ] Essentially, opera told this frightened 19-year-old, "Baby, you're okay.

You're alive."

But you know, opera's a jealous lover.

Oh, yeah.

She and the other friends who liked her the way she was back in the '20s -- and I mean the 1820s -- they don't want her to change, to show off her crack at parties, to flirt with other forms.

And she is demanding.

Oh, yes.

Because when you're fucking opera, you're not just fucking one role.

Oh, no.

You're fucking the ghost of every singer that ever sang that role.

You're topping tenors like, uh, Pavarotti.

Domingo, Gigli, Wunderlich.

You're bottoming baritones like Croft, Thibault, Díaz, and MacNeil.

You're motorboating mezzos like von Stade and Graham and Horne.

[ Laughter ] And if you're successful, you'll find yourself facing even the ghost of yourself... [ Band plays note ] ...what you used to do, who you used to be, how you used to sound.

You know, I knew a great American spirit, the great soprano Phyllis Curtin.

[ Cheers and applause ] Phyllis used to tell a story about how she was home one afternoon at her apartment, drying her hair.

And she was listening to the Saturday afternoon broadcast of "Tosca."

She realized in that moment that she would never sing "Tosca" again.

And she threw herself on her bed and wept.

She called it her first death.

Those tiny deaths, you know, the ones we all experience, no matter who we are, and suddenly wonder, Who am I?

Where am I going?

Where's the magic now?

Am I alone?

♪♪ ♪ Spirit, move me ♪ ♪ Every time I'm near you ♪ ♪ Whirling like a cyclone in my mind ♪ ♪ Sweet ancestors, angels of my lifetime ♪ ♪ Answer to all answers I can find ♪ ♪ Baby, I want you, come ♪ ♪ Come, come into my arms ♪ ♪ Let me know the wonder of all of you ♪ ♪ Baby, I want you now ♪ ♪ Now, now, and hold on fast ♪ ♪ Could this be the magic at last?

♪ Now, I want you to think of some tiny death you've had, of some experience you've just got to let go.

And I want us to call on the ancestors, yours and mine, to help us all die just a little bit together.

♪♪ ♪♪ [ Singing "Recondita Armonia" in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in Italian ] ♪♪ ♪ Let me know the wonder of all of you ♪ ♪ Baby, I want you, baby, I want you, come ♪ ♪ Come, come into my arms ♪ ♪ Oh, let me know the wonder of all of you ♪ ♪ Baby, I want you now, now, now, now ♪ ♪ Now and hold on fast ♪ ♪ Could this be the magic at laaaaast?

♪ Oh.

Oh.

I'm calling on you.

I'm calling on you.

I'm calling on you.

I'm calling on you.

I'm calling on you.

♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ [ Laughter ] ♪♪ [ Singing "Flower Duet" in French ] ♪♪ Oh, who sent flowers?

[ Laughter ] What it you?

Was it you?

No?

Yes, I know, they're beautiful, aren't they?

Yes, I know, but it's so annoying.

[ Continue singing in French ] They could sing this all day.

It's from that opera.

What is it?

That French opera?

What's it called?

"Lick Me!"

[ Laughter ] [ Continue singing in French ] Yeah, that's one way to keep opera alive.

[ Continue singing in French ] ♪♪ ♪♪ Really, you shouldn't have.

Oh, no.

This is -- This is too much.

I'm sorry.

I don't mean to be rude.

But if I don't read this, they'll just sing the entire opera.

[ Laughter ] "To all the audience at Blythely's Lincoln Center debut."

Aha.

These flowers aren't for me.

They're for you.

Big surprise.

[ Flowers singing in French ] Let's see who they're from.

Oh, God.

They're from that mezzo Stephanie Blythe.

You know her?

[ Cheers and applause ] Yes.

Yes.

Lovely mezzo.

Great tits.

[ Laughter ] Totally bonkers, online-stalker type.

You know the type.

She's DMing me all day long.

I think she has a thing for beards.

[ Laughter ] [ Flowers singing in French ] No, seriously, she's really crazy.

Every time I look in the mirror, I'm terrified she'll be looking back at me.

She's always about two steps away from boiling my bunny.

[ Laughter ] Ah, well, I might as well read this to you in her voice.

I do a great Stephanie Blythe impersonation.

[ Laughter ] ♪♪ [ Grunts ] [ Laughter ] ♪♪ ♪♪ It always takes a little while to put on Stephanie.

♪♪ [ Laughter ] [ Clears throat ] [ Normal voice ] Dearest friends, family, fans, and people who thought they were coming to a Rufus Wainwright concert... [ Laughter ] Sorry, no refunds.

...thank you for being at "American Songbook" tonight.

This is a wonderful series, a gorgeous space, and always attracts the most sexy audience."

[ Cheering ] "I'm only sorry that I can't be there with you tonight.

I'm very busy at the moment.

Thank you for welcoming my dear Blythely.

I remember when I first welcomed him.

We were to a local wig shop.

I was busying myself with the merkins, sideburns, and 'stashes when I looked up and I saw that beard staring back at me.

We talked and sang for hours in that shop and then moved to a local karaoke bar for tapas and a very moving rendition of 'Don't Stop Believing.'

There was so much Bowie, Abba, Springfield, Captain & Tennille.

We must have been a sight to see.

When we parted, I thought it was just a one-night stand, that Blythely would live in that karaoke bar bathroom.

But here he is again.

And that's because of you.

I can't tell you how much you mean to me.

You give us permission to be the singers we want to be, the people we want to be.

These flowers are for you.

You have made us feel loved."

♪ Gentle strangers ♪ ♪ You came into my life when I was feeling sad ♪ ♪ And I looked up that day ♪ ♪ To see your face ♪ ♪ Shining in the sun ♪ ♪ Mm, mm, mm-mm-mm-mm ♪ ♪ Your eyes were kind ♪ ♪ And you spoke softly to me ♪ ♪ You were just passing through ♪ ♪ Tomorrow, you would be gone ♪ ♪ But we shared conversation and wine ♪ ♪ And talked of many things ♪ ♪ And on that night ♪ ♪ I sang softly in your arms ♪ ♪ And you kept me warm ♪ ♪ You kept me from harm ♪ ♪ You gave me love ♪ ♪ Mm, mm, mm-mm-mm-mm ♪ ♪♪ ♪ Yes, I knew you'd be leaving in the morning ♪ [ Flowers vocalizing ] ♪ By the dawn you'd be going on your way ♪ [ Flowers vocalizing ] ♪ But you can never know about tomorrow ♪ ♪ And I know you make me beautiful ♪ ♪ Beautiful ♪ ♪ Todaaay ♪ ♪♪ ♪ Gentle strangers ♪ ♪ I'm now returned again to lonely days and nights ♪ ♪ I know I will not feel the pain so much ♪ ♪ For a memory of you comes and wraps itself around me ♪ ♪ In the dark ♪ ♪ And in my dreams I sing softly in your arms ♪ ♪ And I am warm ♪ ♪ And we are safe from harm ♪ ♪ We are loved ♪ ♪ I am lo-o-o-oved ♪ ♪ I am loved ♪ ♪ We are lo-o-o-oved ♪ ♪ We are loved ♪ ♪ You are lo-o-o-oved ♪ ♪ I am loved ♪ ♪♪ "Love Stephanie Blythe."

[ Cheers and applause ] [ Deeper voice ] Thank you, Stephanie.

Leave it to you to upstage me at my own concert with the Captain & Tennille.

[ Laughter ] If you weren't so batshit crazy, I'm sure we'd be best friends, even if only on Facebook.

Eh.

[ Laughter ] Drew, where am I in this musical extravaganza?

Drew: What happens when you're having a bad week?

Oh, well, when I'm having a bad week -- when I'm having a bad week, it's you.

You know, it's you, and it's your generosity.

It's your humanity.

You provide the cure.

You're the cure.

And in some small way, I hope I can be the cure for you, too.

[ Piano playing ] Birdie, take this down in my Grindr.

[ Laughter ] Birdie: Grindr?!

Yes, Grindr.

Come on.

All the opera queens are on Grindr, whether they want to admit it or not.

[ Laughter ] Okay.

Take this down.

[ Down-tempo music plays ] ♪ I don't care if Monday's blue ♪ ♪ Tuesday's gray and Wednesday, too ♪ ♪ Thursday, I don't care about you ♪ ♪ It's Friday, I'm in love ♪ [ Tempo quickens ] ♪ Monday you can fall apart ♪ ♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, break my heart ♪ ♪ Oh, Thursday doesn't even start ♪ ♪ It's Friday, I'm in love ♪ ♪ Saturday, wait ♪ ♪ And Sunday always comes too late ♪ ♪ Friday never hesitates ♪ Sorry.

Um... Can you just say that again with a couple of different better rhymes?

♪♪ ♪ I don't care if it's Monday's black ♪ ♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, heart attack ♪ ♪ Oh, Thursday, never looking back ♪ ♪ It's Friday, I'm in love ♪ ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah, ah-ah ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah, ah-ah ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪ ♪ Friday, I'm in love ♪ ♪ Saturday, wait ♪ ♪ Sunday always comes too late ♪ ♪ But Friday never hesitates ♪ ♪ Ohhhhhh, ohhhhhh ♪ [ Flowers singing in French ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ♪ [ Flowers continue singing in French ] ♪♪ ♪ Friday, I'm in love ♪ [ Flowers continue singing in French ] ♪♪ ♪ Friday, I'm in love ♪ ♪ Friday, I'm in love ♪ ♪ Love ♪ ♪ Friday, I'm in looove ♪ So sorry to interrupt.

I just -- I think I missed one of the rhymes.

It goes, late, wait, attack, black, [indistinct] And it's Grindr.

Do you know how to do accent [indistinct]?

Ugh!

♪ I don't care if Monday's blue ♪ Do you?

♪ Tuesday's gray and Wednesday, too ♪ [ Speaks indistinctly ] ♪ Thursday, I don't care about you ♪ ♪ It's Friday, I'm in love ♪ I got it.

♪ Ohhhhh ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah, I'm in love ♪ ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah, I'm in love ♪ ♪ I'm in lo-o-o-o-o-ove ♪ ♪ I'm in lo-o-o-o-o-ove ♪ ♪ I'm in lo-o-o-o-o-ove ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] Thank you so much, darling flowers.

You're lovely flowers.

Yes.

Head on back to garden now, darlings.

Yes.

[ Applause ] Yes.

You should all have flowers so lovely.

[ Laughter ] Oh.

You know...

Sorry.

[ Laughter ] I don't care what day of the week it is.

Doesn't matter, as long as we're all here together.

All of us.

You know, art clowns, connoisseurs, opera queens, critics, snobs -- all of us here together changing, harsh and beautiful, as the world changes.

The only problem is... sometimes we're so busy mourning the change that we lose all that we've gained.

Like my silver hair.

Fantastic.

An audience that I can sit with and talk to -- unheard of.

Exchanging a baton for a microphone -- [chuckles] fantastic.

[ Laughter ] And a new, much hairier career path to weave around my days on the opera stage... ...that are to me...

Thank you.

Birdie.

...are to me, opera or otherwise, it's just -- it's just transition in public, isn't it?

It's sort of a striptease of the soul.

It says, "It's okay.

You're alive.

It's all right.

It's all right to breathe and to change and to move, to sweat.

It's all right, as long as you do something.

For God's sake, do something."

You know, as the -- as the great philosopher David Bowie once opined, you have to turn and face the strange.

And isn't that what we've been doing tonight?

[ Laughter ] ♪ Still don't know what I was waiting for ♪ And my time was running wild A million dead-end streets And every time I thought I'd got it made It seemed the taste was not so sweet So I turned myself to face me But I never caught a glimpse Of how the others must see the faker I'm much too fast to take that test Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes Turn and face the stranger Ch-ch-changes Don't want to be a richer man Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes Turn and face the strange Ch-ch-changes There's gonna have to be a different man Time may change me But I can't trace time I watch the ripples change their size But never leave the stream of warm impermanence And though the days flow through my eyes Still the days, they seem the same And those children that you spit on As they try to change their worlds Are immune to your consultations They're quite aware of what they're going through Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes Turn and face the strange Ch-ch-changes Don't tell them to grow up and grow out of it Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes Turn and face the strange Ch-ch-changes Where's your shame?

You left us up to our necks in it Time may change me But I can't trace time Strange fascinations, fascinating me Changes are taking the pace I'm going through Ch-ch-ch-changes, turn and face the strange Ch-ch-changes Look out, you rock 'n' rollers Cha-da-da-da-changes Turn and face the strange Ch-ch-changes Pretty soon you're gonna get older Time may change me But I can't trace time I said that time may change me But I can't trace time I said the time may change me But I can't trace time [ Cheers and applause ] You know...

I cannot wait for that [indistinct] vodka later.

You know, whenever we have a successful transition, it's important to sing an anthem.

Yes.

Yes.

It's important to sing an anthem.

And so, we're going to do one more aria, but as we do it, I want you to hold your transitions in your arms.

And I want you to make love to them sweetly and gently with a little tongue... [ Laughter ] ...and some dirty talk, maybe a bubble bath and a nice chilled bottle of sauvignon blanc, as we all sing together... ♪ Time may change me ♪ ♪ But I can't trace time ♪ All: ♪ Time may change me ♪ ♪ But I can't trace time ♪ ♪ Time may change me ♪ ♪ But I can't trace time ♪ ♪ Time may change me ♪ ♪ But I can't trace time ♪ [ Piano playing, bell chimes ] ♪♪ [ Singing "We Are the Champions" in foreign language ] ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Continues singing in foreign language ] ♪ My friends ♪ [ Singing in foreign language ] ♪ Till the end ♪ [ Singing in foreign language ] ♪♪ ♪ No time for losers ♪ ♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪ [ Singing in foreign language ] [ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪ ♪ I've taken my bows ♪ ♪ And my curtain call ♪ ♪ You've brought me fame and fortune ♪ ♪ And everything that goes with it ♪ ♪ I thank you all ♪ ♪ But it's been no bed of roses ♪ ♪ No pleasure cruise ♪ ♪ I consider it a challenge before the whole human race ♪ ♪ That I ain't gonna loooose ♪ ♪ We are the champions, my friends ♪ ♪ And we'll keep on fighting till the end ♪ ♪ We are the champions, we are the champions ♪ ♪ No time for losers ♪ ♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪ Sing it!

♪ We are the champions, my friends ♪ Come on!

If you want it!

♪ And we'll keep on fighting till the end ♪ Yeah!

Yeah!

♪ We are the champions, we are the champions ♪ ♪ No time for losers ♪ ♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪ One more time!

♪ We are the champions, my friends ♪ ♪ And we'll keep on fighting till the end ♪ ♪ We are the champions, we are the champions ♪ ♪ No time for losers ♪ ♪ 'Cause we are the champions ♪ [ Singing in foreign language ] ♪♪ ♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ] Thank you very much.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, Hailey McAvoy, Margaret Tigue, Sav Souza, Messapotamia Lefae.

Thanks, Mike Ian, Andrew Nelson, Jimmy Coleman, and Drew Wutke.

[ Cheers and applause ] Thank you very much.

[ Cheers and applause ] And coming to the stage... Rebecca Kanach with Machine Dazzle, costume design, and the great John Jarboe!

[ Cheers and applause ] My partner in crime.

Yes.

[ Cheers and applause ] Thank you very much.

[ Cheers and applause ]