[somber string music] NARRATOR: Since 2017, the suicide rate among African-American youth has increased faster than any other group.

The myth that black kids don't die by suicide, coupled with the stigma associated with depression and self-harm, keeps many young people from getting help Next on Our Time: Filmmakers Kalia Hunter and Kallista Palapas recount personal and unvarnished stories of young black lives lost to suicide In doing so, they challenge their schools and communities to: listen, grieve, and act.

And then stay tuned afterwards for interviews with the filmmakers.

[upbeat music] BOY: Why don't people understand me?

BOY: I'm tired of running so fast.

GIRL: I want to be heard.

BOY: Why are people afraid?

I'm ready for change.

I hear you.

I see you.

GIRL: My time...

BOY: My time... Our time is now.

NARRATOR: Major funding for this program is provided by: The Russell Grinnell Memorial Trust, Steve and Mary Anne Walldorf, and Betsy and Warren Dean.

Additional funding is provided by: Arts in Society the Joseph Henry Edmondson Foundation, the Bee Vradenburg Foundation, The Buck Foundation, The Calm Foundation, the Kirkpatrick Family Fund, the Cultural Office of the Pikes Peak Region and Will Stoller-Lee.

[music plays from laptop] ♪ Five...four... three, two, one!

♪ We're going a on trip ♪ In our favorite rocket ship ♪ Zooming through time ♪ Little Einstein!

♪ Climb aboard ♪ Get ready to explore... [click] [dramatic music] ATLANTA: He was really vibrant, He had a good sense of humor, and it was really easy to get along with him.

And he also just had like... he just connected with everyone Through video editing Dominic would just take these little moments throughout the day, like his happiest moments and just put them in this little 15-second Instagram video.

Really just captured the essence of the day like you could just sense happiness.

BAXTER: He was rebellious.

He just really had a passion for creating.

Kind of stupid to say.

But I used to, like, brag about hanging out with Dominic, and we all did because, like, he's the leader of our group, and he's like, the captain.

[keyboard playing] FATHER: Dom was the guy that would come in the room and make everybody feel comfortable.

He's always loved music.

He's always been involved in music.

His science teacher challenged Dominic to write a rap about the periodic table and he wrote an entire rhyme about the periodic table and rapped it in front of the class.

DOM: I'm going off the top like a crop-top off of a body with the body that make the whole world stop.

Just for watching, ESTHER: He would go to the recording arts room, and the next thing you know It was him... And then he start bringing his friend... After friend, after friend.

I'm like, okay, I see what's going on here But they will just go upstairs and make music.

That's where he'd spend most of his time upstairs.

REPORTER: Starting on July 6th, the Summer Recording Arts Workshop will give the opportunity for creative musical minds all across the Pikes Peak region to meet with a mentor and produce their own work.

DOM: I can grow up to be like the guys I look up to like Waka Flocka, and all of them.

Like, their music's, like, super cool.

And like, that's what I've been like, coming here to figure out how to make everything make sense a lot easier And I could, like, focus all of the things I'm trying to do.

ESTHER: He brings joy to you.

He makes you feel excited about things because he's always excited about everything.

"Oh, my God, Miss Esther, listen to this beat."

"Oh, my God.

Miss Esther."

"I'm going to do that!"

He's just always full of life.

[upbeat guitar] FATHER: His mom.

His love for his mom... You know, they were inseparable.

I think his aunt said the best when she said that they shared the same soul.

Unbelievable.

He was taught by his mother to always love all.

She was the centerpiece of this house.

She passed away on July 1st, 2014.

I was in Afghanistan when it happened.

So she hung on for a couple of hours And I made it to Kuwait when I found out she had passed [somber music] FATHER: It was devastating.

Dom was here when it all happened.

They both were here, and I wasn't.

It crushed him.

He became a different person.

He became... A...stranger.

ATLANTA: That was really hard, just to see him go through the stress of school, just to see him at school and see him miserable.

Yeah, that was pretty hard.

BAXTER: He probably showed the signs of depression and he was super mopey and always kind of dwelling on things, and... in a negative sense.

FATHER: But he wore a good mask.

I didn't really know what he was What he was, you know, dealing with because I was too busy dealing with it myself.

He just changed.

ATLANTA: You could just see it in his mannerisms, the sluggish kind of motion, the drug use We all tried to help him through you know, when he was having a really bad day, but we didn't really try and like help, help him.

BAXTER: He said something about it One time, like, "I'm not going to make it to 40" "Like, it's going to be over when I'm young."

[heartbeat] [police siren] FATHER: I got a call from the E.R.

I didn't believe it.

I texted a lot of our mutual friends and I'm like, Is this real?

Like what?

You know?

No one could really believe it.

It still hasn't really sunk in.

You know, but just hearing that and that initial impact was...

Terrible.

So yeah.

[mournful piano] FATHER: I have a bunch of his things that I keep to myself.

That I know he loved.

And whenever I see things that remind me of him, you know, I talk out loud, you know?

My son was...handsome.

My son was smart.

My son was everything that I wanted him to be.

And... Other than his mother, I've never met a soul like his before.

FATHER: Most of the stuff in here is some of the equipment as well that are donated here.

It's all Dominic's.

It was all in his bedroom.

The Einstein photo.

That photo.

Those photos.

Some of the paintings.

This is what his bedroom looked like, so... You know, Dominic loved this place, and... this place loves kids and they're doing a lot to give back to the local kids, so I feel like...

This is my next thing is to help the community, help the kids, maybe become a counselor or something.

It's something in that arena.

WOMAN: Three to seven.

Can do that too, those food truc that are usually parked off of that are usually parked off of Nevada.

WOMAN: They're all over.

FATHER: I just want because, you know, if you call it "suicide prevention," nobody's you show up?

Right.

What if we call it "Dom's Day"?

We could.

[upbeat piano] ♪ They say that it's a matter of time ♪A thousand days and the sun won't shine ♪ Before I come back to you.

Everything doesn't have to have an answer.

but everybody needs to be able to tell their story.

Find out exactly what your definition of living life is Before you end it.

You do things that you love.

You make documentaries.

You write for hip hop magazines.

You do fundraisers for kids.

You teach music at the conservatory.

Whatever it is that makes you feel you haven't worked a day in your life.

That's where your real love is.

And that's where you're really going to find happiness.

♪ But I'm happy.

Nothing's going to stop me.

♪ I'm making my way home.

I'm making my way.

♪ I go solo ♪ Oh, I go solo.

♪ I'm making my way home.

I'm making my way.

NARRATOR: Films in this series are made by teens in partnership with professional filmmakers in the Youth Documentary Academy Young people in the program are empowered to locate and craft their own stories through the art of documentary film.

WOMAN: Mostly school.

GIRL: Yeah.

WOMAN: I'll clean up in here one day.

If I had the heart.

This is Ricky when he was one.

You see the little pigtails?

- Yeah.

WOMAN: So that's his dad.

Me and him, and then him by himself.

And this is Ricky as a baby.

He's, like, four weeks old here.

GIRL: Aww.

WOMAN: So that's when that laugh was born.

GIRL: When I was talking to Ricky's mother and asking if I can make this film, I just knew that this was going to be hard for everyone.

[upbeat acoustic guitar] KALLISTA: What was your favorite thing about Ricky the most?

MOM: Every day Ricky woke up, he'd tell me I'm beautiful.

That was just his thing.

Every day it was like he wanted to put a smile on your face.

He wanted to make you happy.

Your happiness meant more than his.

He was super fun, super excited about everything.

I didn't see him upset until he opened up.

Like, that's just the type of person he was.

FRIEND: He had no bad bone in him.

Like, nothing bad.

He was like such a social person Like, we just, like, clicked, like, right away.

GIRL: Oh!

Okay!

Okay!

KALLISTA: He really didn't care Who you were or or what you look like.

He just loved being around people.

He'd give you the shirt off his back.

And I remember he got these new Jordans, and he said one of his friends had some old shoes, and he was: "I was ready to give him my shoes."

And I'm sitting there thinking.

I payed for them shoes.

You can't give those shoes-- So we argued all the way from school to the house about not giving away them shoes.

But that's just how big his heart was.

I know a lot of people confided in him with a lot of things.

FRIEND: Me and him usually talk about sad stuff when I'm sad.

But when he's sad... he just never opened up about it as much KALLISTA: On the outside, he may all fun and loving, but I knew something inside was hurt.

FRIEND: His smile hid like how he was actually feeling.

I knew... Or, I thought that if he had a problem with something... he would tell me.

MOM: When Ricky was 12, he had a friend that was talking about harming himself.

Ricky was comforting him, and I was like, Oh, well, he should talk to this person.. And Ricky said, "No, I'm all he got."

And that's when I thought, you can't be all somebody got at 12 And at that time I could see a change in Ricky.

Ricky always had these bright eyes and... like a little dimness came over it.

I think after a while it just build up on him.

KALLISTA: He had told me he was suicidal before.

And I asked him if he got help.

He told me yes.

And I just told him to promise me not to do that again.

MOM: I would always text: Are you feeling high or are you feeling low?

And he tell me if he was had low feelings and I'm like, okay, I'm on my way.

We'll talk about it.

Like, every time he act like that I gave him space because he always bounced back.

He just seemed very off.

But it didn't seem off enough to ask.

It just seemed like he was having a bad day and he didn't want to talk about it.

But Ricky would go in therapy and be like...

He cracking jokes in there with Ricky went there and talked about weather, football...

But never get to the root of the problem.

[dramatic music] KALLISTA: Ricky made a group chat called: People I Actually Trust.

When I read the title, I felt like that was probably like a safe place.

After a week, things went down.

The group chat decides to go off again.

It was a black picture.

Nothing.

Says he's sorry, and then that's it.

And then everyone in that group chat started panicking.

And we're checking up on him.

People kept typing.

Why did he say I'm sorry?

Okay, we need to take this seriously.

Are you okay?

What's wrong?

I called him a ton.

It's always go back to voicemail And so I called my boyfriend.

I told him I don't know what to do.

And he was like, I'm going to hang up, You need to call Safe to Tell.

[police sirens] MOM: Then I get a text.

And I just took off running.

Got in a car and I probably did 100-110 to get here.

I got here.

The entire street was closed off.

I call my husband and I'm telling him the paramedics and EMTs are not in the house.

So I know Ricky's is not with us And he says, Don't say that.

I said, No, these are grown men crying in the front yard.

Ricky shot himself.

[dramatic music] KALLISTA: I felt something that I shouldn't have felt.

That something wasn't right anymore.

That something was gone.

I woke up that morning and my dad had just told me someone at my school passed away and I was like, I'm going to see him my next class on Monday.

And I'm going to punch him in the arm and say, "Don't ever scare me like that again."

I felt betrayed and I felt pathetic that I couldn't do anything, that I couldn't make it in time.

FRIEND: I was thinking... What was last thing I even said to him?

I don't know if I said how much I cared about him or anything like that.

- Yeah.

FRIEND: He sat right in front of me.

KALLISTA: It just didn't feel real.

People were crying.

Panic attacks.

Cops around the school, counselors monitoring everything Our school kind of divided for a second.

We knew that we weren't okay.

MOM: I got the message at 7:28.

So every night at 7:28, that's a hard time for me.

So when I'm feeling down, I'll watch his videos, look at some pictures.

But just knowing my baby, he was such a great kid.

That gives me my strength.

Everyday I kiss his urn, go in his room feel a closeness.

He's my kiddo.

My big guy.

Yeah.

MOM: I remember I got him a bracelet.

and it had his name on it.

Then his wrist got too big to wear it.

He liked that, and he liked this little necklace around his neck.

He liked that, and he liked this little necklace around his neck.

and hung it up.

This is Ricky's picture from his vigil.

Celebration of his life.

KALLISTA: It's such a good picture.

MOM: It's my fav-- One of my favorites.

so I just got to decide where to put it.

FRIEND: Like, I didn't think that something like that could happen to someone so close to me.

FEMALE FRIEND: I really was watching the news And I saw said that in the past decade this generation's suicide rate have increased a lot.

MOM: More people are more prone to talk about it now.

Mental illness in itself was not talked about.

Like we're probably going through the same stuff and you have the same feelings that I am right now.

[relaxed beat] KALLISTA: Getting it out there, and making sure that there's a chance to save other people means a lot more than trying to keep it in for yourself.

Somebody on Twitter made the com I should hide my face.

´Cause my son was weak.

I'm not going to stick my head in the sand or hide behind my doors and windows because my son killed himself, because my sayin' it could save someone else.

It hurts me to the core that my son is not here, but I'm not going to hide.

That's not a way to remember Ricky.

KALLISTA: I don't know why he didn't come for us for help.

I don't know... what was taking over him.

If Rickey is hearing this, I love him.

And he is my friend.

But.

It still hurts.

And I miss him.

[crickets] [upbeat music] Death in any community, especially when it's somebody so young, can really affect everybody.

I know other people are feeling like this, and so I wanted to make the film just as like a tribute.

This was as much Dom's film as mine.

In the film it's a lot of his videos that he made, or his music.

I could not get over the fact that I lost a really good friend of mine.

Teachers...

They're very not sure of how to talk to students about it because they're afraid that they may trigger another student.

Talking about suicide and things like that Making this film acknowledges that, yes, we are all hurt, but maybe we can all gain that closure.

My friend texted me saying: I lost somebody important in my life.

And I went back to your film and I felt so much better because of it.

Ricky is doing what he's always wanted to do.

To be there for people to let them know it's going to be okay.

I feel like I accomplished that goal for him to continue to live on.

One of the things I've heard is: "What do you have to be worried about?"

"You're 13, you're 14."

It's actually like, you know, There's a lot to be worried about.

You hear about people being shot and killed in the street and at the same time, you're dealing with high school or college applications, or you know, the typical things that just come when you're a teenager going through puberty and you hate everything.

With my film and Kallista's film you can really see that black people in general in this country are really struggling.

I don't know how to fix it, but...

I hope that this can kind of help.

[upbeat music] NARRATOR: Major funding for this program is provided by: The Russell Grinnell Memorial Trust, Steve and Mary Anne Walldorf, and Betsy and Warren Dean.

Additional funding is provided by: Arts in Society: the Joseph Henry Edmondson Foundation, the Bee Vradenburg Foundation, The Buck Foundation, The Calm Foundation, the Kirkpatrick Family Fund, the Cultural Office of the Pikes Peak Region and Will Stoller-Lee.

For more information, additional resources, or to watch Our Time films, please visit: www.youthdocumentary.org