- You look beautiful though.

- I appreciate that.

Tell me your name.

- I'm Jay.

- Thanks Jay.

Nice to meet you.

- Yes.

Nice meeting you too.

- Yeah.

- Camera set.

- You ready?

- Yeah, I'm ready.

I'm ready to tell some of my stories.

I'm ready to be me, you know?

Like, show the me that I never got to show.

Yeah.

- Well, let's talk about that.

- Okay.

♪ We're gonna take over ♪ - [Rose] Every life has a moment, a shift that changes the way you see everything.

- You gotta have hope in tomorrow.

If you don't have hope in tomorrow, it's game over.

- [Narrator] In those moments, people discover what remains and the courage to step forward anyway.

- Tell me about the moment where you didn't succeed.

- I'm coming to realize there's room for redemption.

- Where you prepare for what you are about to embark on.

What comes next is not the end of the story, but the beginning.

- Resilience.

What does that word mean to you today?

- Life's a blessing.

Appreciate the blessing by living it fully.

♪ Can you feel it ♪ ♪ We're gonna take over ♪ (gentle upbeat music) - Hello, Rose.

- Hello.

Thank you for meeting me here at this lovely, lovely place.

- Oh, it is so beautiful.

Nice to meet you.

- Thank you.

How are you?

- [Keri] I'm amazing.

- This is a haven.

- Yes it is.

- For just whatever emotion you're feeling, whatever you're going through.

- Yeah.

- Come to the Atlanta Botanical Garden.

- [Keri] Yeah, it feels like very serene.

- Yeah.

Born in Decatur, Georgia, Keri Hilson is a singer and songwriter, the voice of a certain era, and a pretty exciting performer.

With multiple Grammy nominations and various other awards, she's had hits such as "Knock You Down", "Pretty Girl Rock", and "Energy."

- Please welcome back to the program, Keri Hilson.

(audience applauds) - And during a successful run, Keri took a step back from music for 15 years.

Now she's back and ready to reconnect with the industry and her fans.

Now here's a fun fact.

Keri and I have never met, but we share the same birthday.

So come along as we walk through the Atlanta Botanical Garden and find out what she's been up to these last 15 years.

Let's go back then to Keri Hilson maybe around the early right into the teen years.

- Okay.

- You've been sort of mapping out that you were gonna do something, but let's talk about that 12-year-old Keri Hilson in Decatur, Georgia.

- Okay.

- Who was she?

- 12-year-old Keri Hilson was very physically active.

She loved sports.

- You played basketball.

- I played basketball, I swam, I obviously loved to sing.

She sang in like choir, and chorus, and Black History Month program, and anytime I was allowed and able.

At church, I think I still sang in church.

Yeah, 12.

I was in piano class and horseback riding.

I was still riding horses with my family.

I was, yeah, she was really ambitious.

She had dreams.

She wanted to sing.

She would've settled for playing sports in college, and that was really, that was my life.

Music and sports.

- Do you remember the first song you wrote and what was it about?

- Yes, it was called "I'll Never Let Go", and I was 12 and it was about love, but it was- - Were you in love?

- I wasn't.

I wasn't.

I mean, maybe I thought I was.

It was more fantasy.

The fantasy feeling of love.

- And what was the conversation like when you said, you know, now I've kept up my end of the bargain.

However, I'm about to explore this as a full-time career.

- Yeah, yeah, it was gradual.

It was gradual.

I think I released and unleashed this love and this passion.

I let it blossom responsibly.

I joined a girl group and it was like a weekend thing initially and it was under his name was Marvin McIntyre and Marvelous Studios, and it was like artist development basically.

It was gradual, you know, like I said, at first it was on the weekends and my parents were all for it.

I kept my grades up.

It kept my time and my energy for sure.

- Were you prepared for what you were about to embark on?

- As much as I could be prepared for what I was about to embark upon because there's certain things that you could witness, and I did witness a lot as a songwriter.

I did have to work firsthand with artists.

Big ones, you know?

And that was a blessing because I really did learn a lot, but when you're in the position, your vantage point does not hold a candle to what you will actually experience because now it's happening to you.

So yeah, as much as one could, yeah, I felt prepared.

- I know you cook, but what is Keri Hilson cooking and what's in the Keri Hilson garden as well?

- Right now I am growing jalapenos, cherry tomatoes, I've got spring onions, and I've got sweet onions.

We're about to grow go back to Romaine.

Might do collards again this year, definitely doing kale.

Probably do some more onions and figure out when it's time to plant some more garlic.

That's one of my favorite things 'cause I use garlic a lot.

- How much joy do you get from cooking?

- Oh, I love it.

I love it.

That's another grounding exercise for me.

I could be coming back from Africa and in the airport, I'm like ordering groceries so that I can come home and cook.

Like after a flight, most people are like, I'm going to bed, I'm tired, you know, I wanna do anything but more stuff.

- You wanna cook?

- I wanna cook.

I feel like now I'm home.

Now I wanna know what's edible here.

- [Rose] We've got some stuff.

I saw some tomatoes over here.

- Oh, fennel.

- Fennel.

Okay.

- Yeah.

I did see tomatoes on the corner there.

- [Rose] Okay.

- [Keri] Okay.

- [Rose] And so you're able to take from your garden.

- Yeah, and then chop it up.

- Chop it up.

- Yep.

Roast it.

- Yeah.

- Cook it.

I failed at like watermelon one time.

I really failed.

They all really only got like this big.

Like, what is that?

Tennis ball size and like exploded.

- Yeah?

- I gotta try that again.

I definitely gotta try that again, but tomatoes are great.

- Is there a Keri Hilson go-to dish that is your comfort, or your I need this now and it will make everything all right?

- I heard about this mac and cheese that you have.

- Mac and cheese is, yeah, that's pretty strong.

I mean, honestly probably, everyone says that, but my mac and cheese is notable and that is one of your comfort foods.

Like, I love barbecue foods.

I do love barbecue foods, baked beans, and things like that.

- Are you willing to share something about your mac and cheese?

- Ooh, no, I don't wanna give my secret.

Nope.

Nope.

I don't wanna give my secret there.

Nope.

Not doing it.

- Not even a little?

- [Keri] Not even a little.

- What about the potato salad?

- I will say I don't need as much egg.

A lot of people like a really eggy mac and cheese.

I don't like when it's like too many eggs.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

If I'm doing a large pan, all I need is two.

That's all I need.

But I put other things that help kinda.

- And the particular type of cheese, are you willing to share that?

- No, no.

- Keri Hilson.

- No.

I share music.

- The viewers wanna know.

- I don't share recipes.

- With the first album, you're in the studio and I've had artists tell me, I know when there's a hit here.

- Yeah.

- [Rose] Did you feel that?

- Oh yeah, yeah, I knew.

- You knew it.

- I knew when it was and I knew when it wasn't, and I knew that there were times where a song had to be released that I didn't like particularly.

Like, I didn't choose like my first single "Energy."

I like the song.

Like, I like it.

I recorded it.

I like it.

I didn't feel that was gonna be like, you know?

But "Knock You Down."

You know, it's like certain songs I knew, and I was like, I was just kind of like, waiting for the one that I believe the most in, and it turns out, "Knock You Down", "Pretty Girl Rock."

- "Pretty Girl Rock."

- Even "The Way I Are", which was my real intro, you know, as an artist.

Even "Turning Me On", I knew that it was so like avant garde that it was probably gonna catch in a different realm than I had been introduced 'cause I wasn't in clubs before that.

So yeah, like, I can't say everyone knows, but I knew.

I knew.

I knew, yeah.

- So you didn't necessarily need people to tell you, oh, Keri, you've now arrived.

Just an innate feeling that you are making your mark.

- Yeah.

Yeah.

- Which is different.

- You get indicators.

Yes.

You get indicators.

Like, you see it in people's eyes.

- Because you have control in some elements and some environments, and then you don't.

- Yes.

- And that's what I want to talk about with you next because I'm curious how you handled what you couldn't control, particularly at this height as you were just from 2007 and it was just your trajectory was just rising.

- I think I handled it.

I gave it my best behind closed doors, and in front of the world, like, internally and externally, I think that I handled it the best that I could.

I made some mistakes, sure.

- Like what?

- A lot.

Maybe not speaking up when you don't wanna do something or you feel adamant, you feel very, very adamant about something and someone else feels very adamant about the opposite, and it's a mistake to not fight harder sometimes, you know?

So, yeah.

- Did you have, I'm sure your parents and close friends were there, but was there anyone else within the Keri Hilson camp, so to speak, that was helping you through what you couldn't control and what you weren't maybe expecting and how you could approach that?

Was there any, or was that really hard?

- It was hard, I mean, 'cause you're experiencing it alone.

My team was there for me.

I remember them constantly having to give me advice and telling me things like, "Hey, it'll blow over.

They'll talk about it today, they won't talk about it tomorrow."

You know, that kind of thing.

But when it's you, your likeness, your face, your legacy, all of your years of experience, your dream, your passion, something you love so much and can't do without, it hits differently than it hits the team.

So yes, they definitely tried and they did make me feel better in a lot of ways and in a lot of cases, but, you know, it's me.

You know, I'm the one getting daggers thrown or I'm the one having to sacrifice so much.

Well, they had to sacrifice too, but, you know, like certain things you can't live down.

Certain things just live forever.

You feel as though, because it's your face, you feel as though you'll never live it down, you may not ever overcome this, you may wear a certain scarlet letter for the rest of your life, and some people do.

But I'm coming to realize, like, there's room for redemption, and if you don't leave room for it in your own heart and in your own spirit, in your mind, like, then no one else will.

You cap your success, you cap your growth when you think that something will never open up for you, you know?

- You reached that point, did you?

- Yeah, I'm there now.

That's why I'm back.

That's why I'm back is because I realized, hold on.

You see other redemption stories, you see other people.

- Is it redemption or is it resurgence?

- It's all of it.

- Yeah?

- It's both.

It's redemption, it's resurgence, it's restoration, it's hitting restart.

It's all the R words, you know, it's recovery.

- Rebirth.

All that.

- Rebirth, reemergence.

It's a resurrection, you know, it's all of these things.

I can't just walk through here and not look at what they have.

- And see what they have.

- Yeah.

I don't wanna leave who I am in the hands of anyone else ever again.

You know, now that I'm an adult, I feel I've gained that right, you know?

- You've said that a number of times that we've been talking so far that you have the control now.

- Yeah.

- And that experience for you, Keri, and I know we've talked about it, but that was traumatic.

- For sure.

- Is that the right word to use here?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There are traumas, there are mistakes, there's all kinds of things, but it has made me, I guess, hyper fixated on making sure that I am who I say I am.

Making sure that no one else holds the reins to the trajectory of my career, and also how I'm being portrayed and perceived by the world.

Like, that's important in my job, you know?

So I think you hold things differently when it's like something you've done versus when it's something that you were coerced or, you know, to do.

And I just want all the mistakes to be made on my own, you know?

- That being said, your team has changed a little bit.

- Yeah.

Yeah.

- What was that process like in making the decision and make sure you didn't have a repeat of the 14, 15 years ago?

- It's a lot of explaining who I am, making sure I'm seen by those I work with.

To a degree, they're helping me present myself.

I'm being reflected in so many ways so I have to make sure that I'm voicing who I am and what my intentions are so that they can help me portray or present that to the world, if that makes sense.

- Are you a good listener?

- I think I am.

I think I am.

- Are you sure?

- I think I am.

I think I am.

I mean, in a lot of scenarios, I've had to listen.

I'm still learning.

Like, now that I'm in control, I'm a student.

You know, in a lot of ways I'm a student again.

I'm learning this new business, I'm learning about streaming, I'm learning about analytics, I'm learning about so much, budgets and creating deals, like, that I've never had to be privy to.

I've had to cultivate the art of listening too, but I've also had to cultivate the art of expressing even more, and that's just part of the fight and the balance, I think.

Just making sure that you're articulating and conveying your ideas successfully, but also listening and deferring to someone else's greatness.

So yeah, it's that whole double Dutch act I think, yeah.

- I love it.

- Yeah.

- Keri, did you hit, I don't necessarily wanna use the term rock bottom, but did you hit a point where you had to say, I need to take a break?

- Yes.

- And what was that moment like for you?

'Cause that's another pivotal moment.

- Yeah, it was another pivotal moment that I did choose it, but I didn't feel like I had a choice either.

Life was just really dark and I was at the height of my career, but it was career woes, it was family, it was friendships, it was relationships.

It was like literally the world, and a lot of career, like, I got a place that holds a big piece of the pie.

A lot of career, a lot of relationship, and a lot of ancillary things.

Just life was just dark.

- So it all kind of came down?

- Yeah.

- At the same time.

Not necessarily one event or situation.

- Right, well, yeah, I guess, yes.

It felt like that.

It felt like it was all crashing.

Like, there's a breakup, and then there's career stuff that I'm still fighting my way out of or trying to get my footing, or get on top of and get ahead of and just couldn't.

I felt like I couldn't quite, you know, find my bearing, and I remember telling them I need some time off.

I told management I need some time off.

I thought it'd be just six months.

Turned out to be like a year, and then it turned into 15 years.

Yeah, but I needed it.

I needed it.

- In this 15 year hiatus, were people coming to you saying, well, Keri, are you ready now, or how much more time do you need, or?

- Yeah, I lost some key players in my career.

I did.

Not exactly sure why, but I do know that we have to survive, you know?

And if a lot of your time and attention went to Keri Hilson, now your time and attention has to go somewhere that's lucrative for you.

Like, we all have to do what's best for us, and there's no hard feelings for anyone that kind of jump ship or had to pivot, you know?

And I'm still friends with all of the players.

I'm still cool with everybody involved.

You know, we did build a family.

We were friends as well.

But yes, I got that question mostly from fans 'cause everyone that knew me knew where I stood and that I did wanna come back, and when it wasn't about depression anymore and we were trying to rally back, you know, the troops.

It then became we have to look at restructuring.

- Because it was depression.

- It was depression and now it's business, and now that I feel like I'm in the clear on the depression part, we've gotta get the team back together, we've got to assemble everything, we've gotta structure our deal as such.

The industry while I was gone- - Has changed drastically.

- Drastically.

- So how did you know when it was time to come back?

'Cause you look up and it's 15 years.

- Yeah, it was gradual.

That was gradual also.

There was a lot of fear.

It was a lot of fear.

I don't take well to character attacks.

I think it's hard for anyone, and I was most afraid of becoming- - A target again?

- A target.

Yeah, and click bait and whatever else, and that's not putting the blame outside.

That's just saying it's the nature of entertainment now.

- But you knew that coming back with this resurgence was also, for some people, wanting to rehash or talk about certain events in the past.

Even certain.

- Yeah, I knew.

Yeah.

- Were you prepared for that, or have you set those boundaries?

- I do try to set boundaries, but if I'm PMSing it's really hard to hold that 'cause I'm like, oh, you wanna go there?

Let's go there.

Like, I'm an open book.

When I'm more feeling, I guess, open or vulnerable like we are during a certain week of our cycle.

You can catch me off guard basically, but I do feel ready because I am at peace with what I know, I'm at peace with what I found, I'm at peace with who I am.

I was a good person then, but I have a newfound love for the greatness within me.

Now I can really confidently say I'm a great person, and that helps you not fear as much.

You know, when you're just like, just be authentic.

Tell the truth.

If you keep it real, you don't have to be guarded.

You can be comfortable, you can be confident, you can have peace, you can sleep at night, you can look at yourself in the mirror.

Like, that for me is what this era is all about.

It's just like, I'm willing to tell my truth.

Sure, there's gonna be some healthy boundaries involved in that process, but truth is truth, and I think people feel the frequency of when you're honest and when you are being authentic.

- [Rose] A new chapter awaits.

- Wow!

Yes!

- How beautiful is this?

- Oh, it's so pretty.

Unreal.

I wanna like, make a hammock.

- Now, Keri, you just can't set up a hammock in the middle of botanical gardens.

- I know, but just long enough to read a book.

I wanna read a book in here.

It feels so like fantasy and storybook and like avatar.

Like, it appeals to my flower child.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

- Earlier you talked about cooking brings you joy, and I asked you earlier also about how do you define fame.

So what's bringing joy to you right now?

Is it the fame?

- No.

- 'Cause it's still there although it's a resurgence.

- Yeah.

No.

No, it's the simple things now.

It's when I find a shirt that matches a pair of pants that I have perfectly.

It's the simple things.

It's like getting my hair done, or a nail color that I really enjoy.

Like, I love looking down at this like, nude color on my nails.

You know, a piece of jewelry, sure.

It's so simple.

It's like, oh, I have time to watch a movie.

I'm gonna pour a glass of champagne and watch a movie tonight.

I have time for that.

Carving out me time, reading a book, just the simple being in my garden as we talked about, cooking something like a Caesar salad from my own garden.

So much, Rose, about the simplicity and how much I value what used to be valued small is now so, so, so big.

Like, I could cry tears of joy if I just have a peaceful, chill day.

I'm just really, really content and really happy, yeah.

- But you've also been bringing happiness to other folks through your philanthropic work, and that's been important for you along this journey.

You didn't just, you didn't leave that behind.

You kept it going through the break.

- Yeah, I get that.

My mother is very giving.

She is a caregiver and someone who does big and small things for like anyone she encounters, and I really feel like I get that from her.

Very generous, very generous woman.

And through my foundation and even outside of the foundation, like, I try to do the same, I live the same way.

I think it's really important to care about your community and to serve others and humanity even outside of your community.

Like, things we've done in Africa.

Those are moments I think that kind of make me feel like, oh, this is why I was given these resources.

This is why I have the platform that I have so that I could speak about this, or so that I can help someone through that.

Or so that I can give, donate this to this cause, or go and actually physically help bring light, or, you know, say a speech or whatever that is, bring water to this community, or whatever it is.

Like, that's what life truly is about.

All of this singing, performing, hair, makeup, handbags, cars, like, airplanes, like, it dims in comparison to the moments of humanity that some people make it and don't care about that.

You know what I mean?

But I think they're remiss because that to me is a really empty existence when it's just about how you look, it's just about maintaining your, you know, your persona for the world.

That's so empty.

So empty.

- Keri, if you don't take that break or there was gonna be a year, but it turned into 14, 15 years, if you don't take that break, that much needed break, do you think about where you would've been now or what could have happened?

- I think I would say I have thought about that.

I don't have an answer.

You know, 'cause my life- - 'Cause you did take the break.

- I did take the break and my life took the path that now in hindsight, I'm like, wow, that was an interesting way to teach me a lot of things, you know?

Yeah, I made the choices I made and I now can say I am content, and happy, and pleased, and I accept everything that has happened during that time as part of my journey.

- So if it's never about the destination but the journey, you've embraced it, and here we are for the next chapter.

- Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

But I can't even, I can barely even see what's next.

I'm enjoying the journey.

I'm enjoying this interview, this moment with you here in this beautiful environment.

Like, I try not to even really think about what I have for the rest of the day.

You know, like you have to really be present, and that has been another lesson that I think is of utmost importance.

To be present, be here.

- Do you think we could maybe get a hammock in here for you?

- I hope so.

- The Keri Hilson hammock.

- Atlanta Botanical Garden, that would be amazing.

Just let me come read a book.

I'll come at night.

We don't have to bother anybody.

(both laughing) - Thank you so much.

- Just be me.

Maybe a glass of wine if you'll allow it, and a book.

- [Rose] New beginnings can emerge from the end of old paths, and in the case of Keri Hilson, small breaks led to an incredible journey.

And along the way, taking time to recharge or reevaluate is okay, especially when the direction feels misguided.

It's a moment of restoration that can lead to growth.

Like plants and flowers, we can prune what's no longer necessary and learn to use new tools to reach an even higher terrain.

(upbeat dramatic music) - [Announcer] W-A-B-E.