NARRATOR: The nation's favorite celebrities-- Got some proper bling here.

NARRATOR: --paired up with an expert-- [INAUDIBLE] NARRATOR: And a classic car.

Get your legs up, girls.

NARRATOR: Their mission, to scour Britain for antiques.

All breakages must be paid for.

This is a good find, is it not?

NARRATOR: The aim, to make the biggest profit at auction.

But it's no easy ride.

Who will find a hidden gem?

Who will take the biggest risks?

Putting my antiques head on.

NARRATOR: Will anybody follow expert advice?

I think it's horrible.

NARRATOR: There will be worthy winners-- This is better than Christmas.

NARRATOR: --and valiant losers.

Time to put your pedal to the metal.

This is "Celebrity Antiques Road Trip."

Yeah!

Today's celebrities come with a pair of IQs that you can barely squeeze into a tiny MG. Well, I'm still a bit confused really.

I mean when they said, do you want to be on "Celebrity Antiques Road Trip," I thought I was the celebrity and you were the antique.

[LAUGHING] Apparently we've got to buy stuff as well.

NARRATOR: Yes, eggheads, Lisa Thiel and Barry Simmons have temporarily swapped TV quizzing for the open road.

Well I just love the walnut steering wheel and all the walnut fascia and all the knobs and twiddles.

I'm a great one for liking knobs and twiddles on things.

There are so many things I could say to that, none of which are appropriate.

NARRATOR: Brain of Britain and veteran of a bevy of top tricky quizzes, Barry has been an egghead for seven years.

While young Lisa, who made her TV debut on the "Weakest Link," is "Eggheads" newest bright recruit.

But do big brains find big bargains?

I'm going to work on the an adage of William Morris.

William Morris said, "have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful."

NARRATOR: Nice theory, Barry, but you might want to run it past our expert pairing of Paul Laidlaw and Christina Trevanion.

They are going to be uber competitive aren't they?

Totally, quizzing, yeah, it's like a Lalique table, doesn't it?

Oh gosh, does it?

Yes.

- Is it very, very serious?

- Yeah.

Oh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

NARRATOR: And as all good eggheads surely know, the 1957 Morris Traveler dates from a time before seat belts were mandatory.

The biggest problem is if they think we're as good at what we do as they are.

Imagine if they were like, this is clearly arts and craft.

Who designed it?

What do you mean?

How do I know?

NARRATOR: Fortunately our self-deprecating auctioneers are actually rather good at this lark.

And with 400 pounds for each pairing there's every prospect of profits.

Hang on this isn't part of the plan.

What do you think happened to it?

Is it just not-- I think the clutch was slipping and it just decided it had enough.

It's a shame.

I do hope it gets well again quickly.

Well, there is a bright side, Lisa.

- Yeah.

- It's not raining.

NARRATOR: Well the path to road trip glory is rarely a smooth one.

BARRY SIMMONS: How far is it to Shipley?

[LAUGHING] NARRATOR: Must make a pleasant change from the comfy TV studio.

I'm going to test them.

Grand National, 1965, who came third?

[LAUGHING] Team Laidlow.

NARRATOR: Looks like you're going to have the opportunity rather sooner than you thought, Paul.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Hello.

LISA THIEL: Hi.

BARRY SIMMONS: Hello.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: What on earth are you doing?

Are you not supposed to be in a vehicle?

Well we are, but it couldn't quite make it up the hill so we decided to walk and see if we could get there on our own steam.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Oh, bless you.

Well you must be Lisa.

- That's right, hello.

Hello, my love, nice to meet you.

I'm Christina.

Hello, you must be Barry.

Oh, hello.

Lovely to see you.

Hi,how you're you doing, I'm Paul.

Good to see you.

Barry, Paul, right.

So we sort of rather need to find an antique shop.

Need a lift then?

Would you like to come with us?

How are we pairing up?

How are we doing this?

BARRY SIMMONS: Oh, that's a good question.

Oh, I think clearly if Christina and I were to pair up, there would be a massive overload of beauty and glamor on one side only.

So Barry, you pair up with Christina, I'll go with Paul.

We'll add some gravitas in the front then.

There we go, absolutely, and I love you dearly already, but I'm driving.

Thank you.

NARRATOR: So now with just the one car, our trip starts out in the Yorkshire town of Keighley and zigzags over to Lancashire, taking in the city of Liverpool before an auction back in Yorkshire at Thurcroft.

First out at the traps are Lisa and Paul.

All right, we'll see you later.

PAUL LAIDLAW: OK, folks.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: All right, have fun.

We'd wish you luck, but we would be insincere.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Indeed.

No.

NARRATOR: Keighley was the birthplace of Molly Sugden, TV's Mrs. Slocombe.

I wonder if the proprietor is free?

- Hello.

- Hello, NARRATOR: They're in luck.

How you doing?

You are?

Simon.

Simon, Paul.

Paul.

I'm Lisa.

Lisa, Simon.

Wow, Simon, it is impressive in its scale.

Our work's cut out for us.

It's going to be a lot to do here.

Best take my coat off, I think, so right.

I'll take your coat if you want.

Is this yours, Simon?

Family business.

Wow.

NARRATOR: Yes, this place looks a lot more interesting than Grace Brothers too.

Can't see any wigs but-- You can't ever pass up the chance to try on a hat.

No.

You had an awful lot smaller head than I do.

One of the perils of being an egghead, you try getting a hat that fits.

NARRATOR: Let's leave those two to their dressing up, shall we?

Because their rivals are about to arrive in Saltaire, the model village that was created by the great Victorian, Sir Titus Salt.

- Hello.

- Hello.

- Hi.

- Pleased to meet you.

- You must be Alan?

- I am.

Hi, Alan, nice-- Nice to meet you.

Are you all right?

Yeah, this is wonderful.

Our little emporium.

NARRATOR: Well, we're honored, I'm sure.

But what's our Barry's antique knowledge like?

Oh, Lalique.

Oh la la!

What's more, Barry's given this some thought.

I came across this mnemonic for finding antiques called radar.

And it stands for rare, aesthetic, desirable, authentic, and in really good condition, which seem to fit the task perfectly.

So it's just a matter of looking around here and seeing what there is.

NARRATOR: Blimey, our lot usually just buy what they like.

Just in this cabinet up here I saw this little knife just in here.

So this is a little silver-bladed and mother of pearl-handled fruit knife.

Mm-hmm.

And you've got this lovely little hallmark on the side.

Yes.

H and T, Hilliard and Thomason, Birmingham assay mark, or assay town, and an A, probably about 1870, really, really sweet.

The thing that attracted this to me was the price.

Oh.

And it's got a love little cartouche there which has got some initials in it, B for Barry, there we go.

Oh, what could be better then?

NARRATOR: Blooming brilliant.

One of the hangups of quizzes is having to remember all the assay marks from all the various different places.

Really?

Yes, you know, Edinburgh's a castle, and leopard for London and-- Absolutely, yeah.

NARRATOR: Top marks, Barry.

Potentially, it could be a first purchase.

I would agree with that.

I think that's lovely.

We'll try and get the price down a bit though.

Yes.

Let's see what we can do.

How are you at haggling?

Well, we shall see, won't we?

NARRATOR: On that note, I wonder where Lisa and Paul have got to?

Mechanical bellows in oak.

I love these.

I do like a gadget.

And this for me, I wonder does that still work?

NARRATOR: I think it does.

Sorry for the dust, you'll be sneezing for the rest of the day.

As long as that was not Granny's ashes, you're all right.

Do they do anything for you or are they just-- LISA THIEL: So they're mechanical, why exactly?

NARRATOR: Good question.

In the interest of efficiency.

Right.

Because your bellows are single action.

It's puff, puff, puff.

But because you've got gearing here, which drives paddles in here with some velocity and yet constant flow of air so it's just more efficient, 135 pounds.

See back in the day, Arthur Negus time, these were highly desirable.

Now a cautious auctioneer would probably go 50 to 100.

Sounds like a no to those.

I think they're interesting, but they're not sexy.

No, sexy bellow-- it doesn't work as a phrase, does it, sexy bellows?

Scrap that.

NARRATOR: Christina and Barry seem to have got off to a better start.

Oh, a bust of Charlie Chaplin.

How wonderful.

What's on the radar now, I wonder?

CHRISTINA TREVANION: What's your thoughts about that?

Well the more I look at it, the more I like it.

I think it has a George IV, Brighton pavilion look about it.

It does, doesn't it, that one-- BARRY SIMMONS: Yes.

NARRATOR: Not cheap though.

Sugar sifters, I mean, really are they that popular now?

Probably not, but this one is very, very different.

It's still usable, isn't it?

BARRY SIMMONS: Yeah.

Because you can imagine having it on your strawberries.

That is beautiful.

What have we got on that?

We've got arts and crafts, silver-plated-- Oh, even better, arts and crafts.

Circa 1920.

It's got 55 pounds on it.

How does that rate, radar-wise?

I've not seen this before so I think it would tick the rare box.

Brilliant.

It's certainly athletically very beautiful.

Very.

To me this is desirable.

It wants to be held, it wants to be shaken.

It's crying out for that.

Yes, it's authentic and it's in perfect condition.

It's in excellent condition.

So this ticks all five.

Oh, my goodness.

I just have to have it.

- Five out of five?

- Yes, absolutely.

Don't let them know it.

We want it at a certain price.

Oh, it doesn't tick any it's terrible.

NARRATOR: What's more Barry's also found a little something all by himself.

Oh, it has a quotation from Kipling, I love Kipling, "a woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke."

So a little chauvinist sentiment.

I don't know how to take that.

NARRATOR: Yes, steady on.

You do want to win this, don't you Barry?

You would put your little matchbox in there, and it was slightly smaller on this end to keep the matchbox secure.

So keep it firm, yes.

And you would push your matchbox out there, take your match there, and it has a facility to show the striker on there, so a little Vesta case holder.

And of course, pre-electricity, you needed matches all the time.

Absolutely, yeah, I still do.

I still use matches.

Yeah, light your fire, light your oil lamps, light everything.

So everybody that could afford a Vesta case would have had one at the time.

And they are collectible now, especially when they're that beautiful.

And I am partial to the occasional cigar, I must admit.

Are you?

Afraid I am.

Good spot, Barry, well done.

NARRATOR: Yes, he's doing well.

Now, how about those haggling skills?

Hello, hello, hello.

Hello, have you found something?

Oh, this is Molly.

Hello, Molly.

So what have we found?

What can we do on these?

Can I hold Molly at the same time?

Course you can.

Hello, Molly.

NARRATOR: Hope she doesn't bite.

That one, Amanda will probably do that for 40, and the knife and the matchbox, so what we got there, 36.

We'll get them two down to 20.

That sounds-- 20.

And that might help a little bit with that 40.

So 50 pounds for the three.

What do you think-- How do you feel about that?

It's cash, and we give you back Molly as well.

Molly is a million.

And we'll do them for 50.

50 pounds, I think that seems incredibly generous.

I think that's lovely.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, thank you.

Splendid, you're an angel, thank you ever so much.

Right Barry, there's your money.

NARRATOR: Good work, don't forget to give the dog back.

Meanwhile back in Keighley the search goes on.

Simon I see you've got work in progress next door, looks like workshops.

You've got material fresh in there?

Yeah, come on and have a look.

NARRATOR: Paul loves anywhere out-of-bounds, regularly finds bargains behind doors marked private.

Place is full of nice things but nice is not what we need, sexy is what we need.

Arguably, she's sexy.

If you like that sort of thing.

I'll not pass comment.

Royal Dux period piece, about 1900.

SALESMAN: Yeah PAUL LAIDLAW: Yeah.

And we've got-- I'd love to see demure but I think she's anything but-- scantily draped, admiring herself, sat on the mother of all trumpet shells.

I don't know, that's pretty demure for today but, you know, 1900-- she is a page three hussy.

Why is that-- is that's just come through the door?

SALESMAN: Just come through the door.

I do like her, actually.

Do you?

Well I love that art nouveau aesthetic that's quite sort of full on.

I like anything like that.

So she's pretty, and again, you can see that there would be a practical use for her as well.

She, I can see her, she;s sat in somebody's bathroom, and she's got all the beauty samples, or toothbrushes, or you can stash your sponge in there, anything like that.

NARRATOR: Steady, Lisa, steady.

Help us here.

What can that be, that-- Today, a really good price-- Yeah.

125 quid.

That was a really good price.

I think that's all about whether if we bought her for that, what she'd make at an auction.

PAUL LAIDLAW: You know I'd say that's worth 150 to 250 quid.

It is, as you say, the foxiest little cotton-bud holder in Christendom.

Yeah.

I'm not going to clown about.

If you'll sell it to us for that, I'd be delighted to shake your hand, and Lisa will too, I'm sure.

- I will.

PAUL LAIDLAW: Thank you, sir.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Thank you very much.

Thank you.

NARRATOR: Blimey, one buy and they're the golden eggheads.

Just check out the quality of the mirror.

That is heavy, which is normally an immediate sign that something is worth something.

I hear you.

So what are you telling me?

Oh my word!

There is an easel mirror, an easel toilet mirror would be the term, back in the day.

And when is that going to be?

Mid-19th century, 1850.

SALESMAN: Yeah.

Maybe a wee bit later than that.

What's the knack?

Give it a press?

Yeah, press it with one hand, and unclip it with the other.

Give that a press, a little latch there.

SALESMAN: Yeah, press down.

PAUL LAIDLAW: Oh, and the leg extends and locks at various settings.

SALESMAN: Yeah, keeps the angle right for you to look into.

Yeah, again, from a feminine shopper's point of view, you cannot buy something like that.

I've just moved house.

I had terrible trouble finding a mirror to go on my dressing table.

That adjustable thing is an absolute gift as many women will tell you.

Sometimes the light just doesn't strike right when you're putting on your makeup.

You would be dangerous to go shopping with.

You would sell me stuff that I was dithering about.

You would reel me in.

You're brilliant!

You want to hear me when I don't like something.

But let's-- No, I don't know whether that's a Duke or a Baronet's Coronet, but that came from a landed family.

Yeah.

That's silver, we've got no doubt about that.

There's the family monogram.

Can we afford that, Simon, is the question?

Fresh to the market, just come in, 75 quid.

What?

I know-- NARRATOR: Spit it out, Paul.

Oh, it's this little face.

Can we?

Of course, we can, go on.

Oh, f-- I don't know what to say.

There are some prices you'd be embarrassing to haggle over.

I thank you, sir.

- Thank you.

Thank you both very much.

NARRATOR: So 200 pounds for their first couple of buys.

Paul's picks but Lisa seems happy enough.

It's not a bad bit of shopping that, was it?

Loving it.

NARRATOR: Well, you can now relax and take our route over the Pennines towards Burnley, the Lancashire town that was at the heart of Britain's Industrial Revolution.

There were once almost 1,000 cotton looms in Burnley.

And amongst the many reminders of her weaving heritage is the last surviving steam-powered mill in the world.

Graham Myers is the museum's weaving supervisor.

Nice to meet you.

Welcome to Queen Street Mill Textile Museum.

LISA THIEL: Thank you.

NARRATOR: You may remember Anita Manning visiting this mill a few years ago.

But, today, Lisa and Paul are learning about the Mill's unique past starting with how the mill's 990 looms were originally funded by selling 4,000 5 pound shares.

Fairly unique, it was loosely termed a co-operative.

There were other companies that tried to do this and they'd failed.

Burnley came along with a self-help sort of group run by the shareholders.

Now later on they had other share issues.

And actually the people that worked here were eligible to buy shares.

So they became part of the mill, they took ownership.

So just give us an idea then.

If it's a 5 pounds share, how much work would a worker be doing to sort of pay for that kind of share?

Looking about a weaver, a pound a week would be a decent wage.

That's what they were feeding the families on?

Yes, so it was quite a big expense to raise 5 pounds.

But it's not insurmountable to do that.

NARRATOR: As the machinery reveals, the cotton business was a real Lancashire affair with several ancillary trades keeping the looms turning.

Although the raw material came from India, it was turned into thread at local spinning mills before arrival at Queen Street.

That is a cop and that is the package that it comes to us.

We have to transfer that.

So we can use that thread using this machine here.

Once we've made these cones, they were used to create the warp and the weft.

So the warp threads are the ones that go up and down, and the weft is the one that goes this way, is that right?

Yes, yes, the weft is what goes into the shuttle.

Right.

And a way to remember that is it goes from left to right in front of you.

I like that.

NARRATOR: But, whatever the theory, nothing can quite prepare you for the pandemonium of a weaving shed.

[MUSIC AND MACHINERY] Although working conditions had been much improved by the late 19th century this was clearly still a very tough place to work, and remained so until Queen Street closed in 1982.

A little bit quieter in here now-- Thank goodness.

--than the weaving shed.

Yeah, and I can understand you without lip reading.

NARRATOR: It was partly because of the mill's unique ownership that investment was often lacking at Queen Street, but when it was transformed into a museum in the mid-'80s, that outdated equipment turned out to be a very good thing.

This mill is almost exactly the same as it was in 1895 when it opened.

It's the same machinery, which is testament to the machinery itself and the way the mill was run, that they kept it going so long.

NARRATOR: Now our Lisa hails from the rival county of Yorkshire where weaving has always been more about wool than cotton.

So let's see how she fares on a Lancashire loom.

Right hand on there, left hand ready, as you push, you pull.

OK. [MACHINERY] And away it goes.

So right.

OK, right, here we go, one, two, three.

NARRATOR: Mind your fingers.

There you go.

It works!

Yeah, you done it, well done.

NARRATOR: Yet another egghead triumph.

Back in Yorkshire, I wonder how our opposing auctioneer and clever clogs pairing is progressing?

So "Mastermind" comes on and I think, oh, I'm never going to answer any of these.

I bet you sit there and just answer every single one, don't you?

"Mastermind" comes on and I think, oh God, this is so easy.

Oh, no, seriously?

I do, I like the harder quiz.

I like University Challenge and Only Connect, the ones that really push you.

Oh, my goodness.

NARRATOR: OK, fingers on your buzzers you too as you approach your next challenge in the old West Riding at the little village of Cullingworth.

Yep, there's Antiques at Mill.

Oh, thank you, most kind.

Hello.

Hello.

Hi, Hello, you must be Steve, is that right?

Steve, you've been painting today?

I have been painting.

Nice to meet you-- Hi, Steve.

This is Barry, my egghead.

So would you mind if we had a little look around, would that be all right?

- Sure.

Brilliant.

And if there's anything we like the look of, can we give you a holler?

- Yeah, sure.

Brilliant, thank you so much.

Veritable cornucopia.

NARRATOR: That's Latin that is, means horn of plenty, clearly still in Yorkshire though.

I'm reminded of my favorite saying from Socrates actually.

First time he walked into a market, and he had a look around everything and said, so many things I don't need.

Well I don't need many things here, but there's a few that I would like to have though.

NARRATOR: We never got any Socrates from any of our previous celebrities, that's for certain.

Look at the scythe.

NARRATOR: It's all about teamwork though in this game.

I think Socrates might have said that too, or Confucius.

What do you think of this screen, Christine?

The colors are quite vibrant on this.

OK, going back to our mantra, how many homes do you think had a fire screen in them?

Every one.

Point taken.

Not rare, not scarce.

NARRATOR: She knows, whereas one of those-- A little oven for heating up samples in test tubes.

I think it's called an autoclave, 45 pounds.

How do you know that just by looking at it.

I've never seen one of these before in my life.

Oh, you see my first degree was in chemistry.

I've seen equipment like this in class.

- Your first degree?

- Yes.

How many degrees do you have?

Well I've got 2 and 1/2.

Oh, my goodness.

I wasn't very good as a chemistry student.

I mean, I've got a good degree, but I blew myself up once.

What?

NARRATOR: Wow, I'm very glad he sticks to quizzing nowadays then.

Christina, meanwhile, has spotted something a tad less off the wall.

- CHRISTINA TREVANION: Made in the People's Republic of China.

When is that dated to?

Not very old.

BARRY SIMMONS: 1948.

NARRATOR: Obs.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: What are your thoughts?

BARRY SIMMONS: I like it.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: You like it?

I like it, yes.

Framed Chinese watercolor, 55 pounds, it's got on it.

I mean, what's your thoughts about your-- Oven?

- Cooker, oven, lab thing.

- Oh, the cooker.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Yeah.

BARRY SIMMONS: Let's go for the oven.

Well let's see, let's see what-- calm down, calm down, Barry.

NARRATOR: Sage advice.

How would Socrates play it then?

Let's go and see what they can do price-wise on them.

You grab that, I'll grab this, and let's go and see.

[INAUDIBLE] get on?

We've got a couple of things that we potentially might be interested in.

Ah, Chinese reverse painting.

Yeah, little Chinese painting there.

And-- A wonderful copper oven.

A not-so-wonderful copper-- Oh, sorry, terrible copper oven.

You glad to have somebody take it off your have hands.

NARRATOR: Better, Barry.

I would have to telephone those dealers.

All right.

But what are you offering?

Well, as little as possible really, to be perfectly honest.

BARRY SIMMONS: I think maybe 25, 30-- CHRISTINA TREVANION: 25, 30 pounds, see what the dealer thinks about that.

And maybe the same-ish on that.

Do your best for us, darling, do your best, all right.

No pressure.

It's 45, they're offering 25.

Normally we go for 10% but you're the dealer, it's your choice.

25 does seem a little bit cheap to me.

NARRATOR: Cheers, Steve.

35, that's it.

Can I have a chat with Jane?

Hi, Jane, how are you?

It's Christina here.

It's certainly interesting, yes, certainly interesting.

But I think 30 pounds really would be our maximum on it.

Would that be all right?

Splendid, thank you so much.

Brilliant, you've been really, really kind.

Thank you, Jane, I appreciate that.

All right, take care now, bye.

Jane's a legend.

So Jane says potentially 30 pounds on that.

So what's your thoughts about that now?

I want to go with this.

Yeah?

Yes, let's go with this.

Jane has been so accommodating, let's go with this.

Yeah?

30 pounds on your oven.

It's a deal.

There we go, 30 pounds.

BARRY SIMMONS: Lovely.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Thank you so much for your help.

Thank you for your help.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: You're a star.

NARRATOR: Barry's choice and Christina's charm, not bad.

BARRY SIMMONS: Nice to see you.

Bye-bye, bye.

I've never seen you so happy.

[LAUGHING] NARRATOR: Now everyone, back in the Morris, who fancies a quiz?

Nighty night.

Another day, another car.

Oh, look!

What a delightful car.

This reminds me of you, Lisa.

It's cute, it's well designed, and it's got a very bright interior.

NARRATOR: Well said!

Let's just hope this one's up to it.

Who's driving?

Why am I even asking who's driving, It can only be you.

Yes, exactly, get in the passenger seat.

I will indeed.

NARRATOR: Lisa, Barry and the original Fiat Cinquecuento are off to meet Paul and Christina in Liverpool.

My boss is a scouser, he's also your biggest fan.

Oh, how wonderful.

I know, there's no accounting for taste.

Have I had your best fact about Liverpool yet, Barry?

Have you got a really brilliant fact?

Oh gosh, I do believe they have a football team of some note.

I think they might even have two.

NARRATOR: Well said, Lisa.

Now what about our pair of experts?

How are they coping with all that brainpower?

They're the same as us.

No, they're not the same as me.

They are very clever people.

PAUL LAIDLAW: What is Barry like?

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Oh, the man is an absolute delight.

He doesn't sort of intimidate you with his cleverness.

Fight.

NARRATOR: Yesterday our teams adopted very different strategies, with Lisa and Paul splashing out 200 pounds on a dressing table mirror and a Royal Dux maiden figurine.

PAUL LAIDLAW: Arguably, she's sexy.

If you like that sort of thing.

NARRATOR: Whilst Barry and Christina parted with a mere 18 notes for a sugar sifter, a fruit knife, a copper oven, and a Vesta case.

BARRY SIMMONS: Beautiful worked elephant.

Good spot, Barry, well done.

So he has this really interesting mnemonic-- Oh, what, he's got a very bad, chesty cough?

Oh, that's pneumonia, sorry.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: His mnemonic is radar.

PAUL LAIDLAW: OK.

Which-- I can't really remember it.

But everything we've bought so far has scored above a four out of five.

Radar isn't a kind of mnemonic.

No, Barry called it a mnemonic and he's-- So it's a mnemonic.

He would know.

NARRATOR: Later, they'll all be making for a South Yorkshire auction at Thurcroft.

But our next stop is over the water in Liverpool.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Oh, my goodness.

Good morning.

Hello, how are you?

We've stripes today, aren't we?

LISA THIEL: Check it out.

Look at this.

Isn't this beautiful, right?

Yes.

Well, I think this could be huge entertainment value, watching you get in this.

So let's stand back, Barry, and watch Paul get in.

[LAUGHING] BARRY SIMMONS: Oh, yes, we need plenty of room for this one.

Who's driving?

I got it here in one piece, you take over.

Go on, give it your best shot.

Finishing school they showed me how to do this with some style.

Are you going to do it?

Do you want me to open the roof?

BARRY SIMMONS: Oh!

BARRY SIMMONS: What?

What?

Why is it moving backwards?

Oh, it sounds well.

Whoa!

PAUL LAIDLAW: So long suckers.

NARRATOR: So while Barry and Christina take a stroll by the Mersey, Lisa and Paul are getting to know their Fiat which, I think you'll find, stands for Fabrica Italiana Automobili Torino.

Is Barry one of the ones to beat in this game?

Yes, absolutely, Barry is one of the Titans of the cruising world.

You will find him at the top of the game.

All right.

Now, am I right in thinking that it's very black and white, quizzing, either you know or you don't.

There are actually slightly more shades of gray than that because the more you know, the more educated a guess you can make.

I see, yeah.

NARRATOR: What do you reckon?

Bargains within?

A hole in the wall.

It's like a cave, isn't it?

NARRATOR: It is called Tunnel Antiques.

How you doing?

Are you a bouncer or are you the man?

I'm Paul, I'm the owner.

Paul, another one.

- Hi, I'm Lisa.

- Please to meet you, Lisa.

Nice to meet you.

PAUL LAIDLAW: Cavernous is the word.

PAUL SWAINBANK: We're all over the ground, we've got lots of it.

NARRATOR: You certainly have, leave a trail of breadcrumbs you two, whatever you do.

This place is either an Aladdin's cave or the stuff of nightmares, depending on your point of view.

NARRATOR: Certainly a test for our Paul's compulsive tendencies.

Perhaps Lisa will see the bigger picture.

Where else can you go and find Zippy living with polar bears?

NARRATOR: That's the attitude, girl.

I always shop this way.

I don't know what it is, we'll want to see it.

NARRATOR: Well, I just hope she does then.

Yesterday, we fell on those pieces, found a couple of gems, but they were spoon-fed.

I'd like to see what she comes up with.

And in a place like this, it could be anything.

R, I'm guessing an R on its own doesn't really say a lot unless you're a pirate.

NARRATOR: Quite.

Now, what's she seen?

Some sort of specimen-carrying bag or such.

But you see, actually, such bags are quite fashionable now.

Here is Lisa's quick guide to buying a handbag.

Always make sure you have a variety of carrying options, strap, handles.

Look for something in a nice neutral color, goes with everything.

Needs lots and lots of space because you know the gag about women's bags being the repositories of everything but the kitchen sink, it's basically true.

But if you can get the kitchen sink in as well, that's a good thing, and additional pocketing for those small items like pens and stuff that are always at the bottom of the bag when you want to find something.

There you go.

NARRATOR: Time to sell it to Paul.

Oh, hello.

How's it going?

Thought I wasn't going to find you again.

I was looking at this fellow.

It's quite a nice size of bag for all sorts of things.

Camera bag.

You wouldn't-- Yeah, it is.

How did I not spot that?

How did I not spot that?

You wouldn't have to use it as a camera bag is the thing.

It's got a lot of uses.

There are actually, you know, satchel and box bags like that are coming back into general fashion.

It's nice to have the pocket and everything, it is leather.

There's appeal to that for more than camera enthusiasts, I reckon.

So that was my thinking.

See this, stony ground.

I know, I know.

I get everything that you say, but to get a result on that we need you selling it, and that we're not going to have.

It's going to go into a smart auction, auctioneer is going to go old camera bag, vintage camera bag, if he's up selling it, and we're doomed.

LISA THIEL: Yeah.

But that works if it costs you next to nicht.

NARRATOR: Now for the other Paul.

Hiya.

PAUL SWAINBANK: Hiya.

I have just been having a little chat with my man about this.

PAUL SWAINBANK: We're having a special sale today.

That can be 30 quid.

You see, I don't know if that special sale is quite special enough.

I was thinking more in the ballpark of like 15.

I couldn't do it for that.

I'll tell you what I'll do for you, 25 quid.

LISA THIEL: 25 quid.

PAUL SWAINBANK: It's a lovely handbag.

20 quid.

Go on, that's all right.

That is genius.

Thank you so much, my friend.

NARRATOR: Yeah, I'm not sure Paul would define 20 pounds as next to nicht.

What's the cack?

We have got ourselves a splendid multipurpose camera bag for 20 quid.

We've-- We've got?

We've bought?

It's paid for.

It's paid for?

Yeah.

You said you could shop!

You were off.

I turned my back for a minute!

NARRATOR: Get used to it, Paul, because the deed is done.

Well we'd better pray for some hipsters out there.

Yeah.

I'm sure Thurcroft will be thick with them.

Meanwhile, back at the river, Barry and Christina are down by the city's historic Albert dock to find out how modern art was used to save lives at sea.

Meeting them is senior curator, Rosie Cooper.

Hello, you must be Rosie?

Hi, I'm Rosie.

Hi, Rosie, lovely to meet you.

- Hi,very nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

- Welcome to the museum.

Thank you.

Shall we go inside?

- Yeah, absolutely.

- Perfect.

BARRY SIMMONS: Of course.

NARRATOR: The museum has recently commissioned an artist to design a paint scheme for this 1950s Mersey pilot cutter in tribute to the way that thousands of ships were spectacularly transformed during World War I with something called dazzle camouflage.

At that time record numbers of naval vessels were being sunk by German u-boats around the coast of Britain.

So a solution to this really, really needed to be found.

There unlikely would-be savior was Norman Wilkinson, a British marine artist who decided that rather than attempt the impossible and hide each ship from an enemy submarine, it would be better to boggle the brain of the man at the periscope instead.

He came up with this idea, a lot of which was based around the Vorticist art movement.

And they were experimenting with bold, graphic, shapes and colors that would confuse the eye of the viewer making it hard to know exactly what you were looking at.

So Wilkinson realized that this optical effect might actually be incredibly useful if you painted it on the surface of a ship.

So through this sort of optical illusion the enemy u-boats would really find it very difficult to realize the target, speed, range and direction of the vessel.

In those days they used a range finder called a coincidence range finder and that took half images of the ship, which you just had to merge together.

Well that was fine if it was painted all gray, but if they were painted all these obscure colors and all different shapes, you didn't know which bit of the ship fitted to which other bit of the ship.

So how did you know where to fire the torpedo?

NARRATOR: Like Barry says.

And so desperate was the situation that even those at the admiralty, who might have preferred their ship's gray, agreed to the transformation of almost 4,500 vessels.

Wow, aren't they beautiful.

BARRY SIMMONS: Yeah, stunning.

They're amazing.

Look at that one.

- Yeah.

I mean it looks like a zebra.

Was that in black and white?

I think this one probably would have been black and white.

But contemporary paintings and accounts at the time make it very clear that actually color was used quite a lot in dazzle camouflage.

And this one-- I'm only a few feet away from this picture, but even I'm having trouble determining where the start or the ship is and the bow because of the striking shapes that they've used.

NARRATOR: Each artist's individual design was tested on a periscope in the studio before it progressed to the real thing.

Soon other navies adopted the idea, and in America they dubbed it razzle-dazzle.

But did it work?

Whilst it actually can't be proved that dazzle technology was really effective in preventing u-boat targets, the number of ships that were hit did actually go down after the implementation of dazzle.

But there are so many variables that it's hard to tell.

But it's remarkable that a lot of people who were working on board the dazzled ships felt a great upsurge in morale.

And a lot of people reported feeling safer even if it's not that clear whether they were or not.

I'm not surprised.

I mean, they look so fab, don't they?

It's certain to sort of raise a smile on your face looking at a really quite jazzy ship?

I think so, yeah, definitely.

Going to sea in a cubist painting.

Yeah, exactly.

NARRATOR: Quite.

And Picasso even claimed that the cubists invented it, even though the advent of radar meant that in an avant-garde navy It was no longer much use, the dazzle ships have continued to inspire artists like Carlos Cruz-Diez.

It's phenomenal.

Isn't it amazing.

BARRY SIMMONS: Wow, how beautiful.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Look at that.

God, I need dark glasses to look at that.

I know, exactly.

It's really very dazzling indeed.

Carlos Cruz-Diez has been, for many years now, experimenting with the effects of color on the eye.

So, of course, we felt that he was absolutely the right artist to bring-- CHRISTINA TREVANION: Very appropriate.

-- to this commission.

Eat your heart out, Banksy.

Yeah.

NARRATOR: And when your periscope recovers from the Edmund Gardner, there's always Tobias Rehberger's transformation of the HMS President in London or Sir Peter Blake's dazzling redesign of the humble Mersey ferry to feast upon.

BARRY SIMMONS: Well you've opened our eyes in every way conceivable.

Thank you so much for showing us.

It's been an absolute delight, thank you.

You're very welcome.

Very informative.

I've really enjoyed talking to you.

Do you think you've got some new quiz-- Definitely.

--questions or answers there?

I've got some I've got a lot of new facts, I know that.

NARRATOR: I think Barry's a bit of a dazzler himself in that pullover.

Now, [SPEAKING ITALIAN] Paulo, Lisa, and their "auto piccolo?"

Somewhere in the wilds of Lancashire.

Find me, off the top of your head, a random fact that you know I'm going to go, no!

The Tyrannosaurus Rex actually lived closer to the time of humans than it did to the time of the Stegosaurus.

Oh, man.

NARRATOR: They'll be quizzing all the way to the village of Eccleston based in yet another former mill.

Inside it shows it too.

This place is huge.

I think Lisa's feeling overwhelmed.

Look at this, it's like an aircraft hangar, this place.

And there's all and sundry, vintage, retro, antique, fine, bric-a-brac, everything in between.

Lisa, brain the size of a planet crammed full of facts, but maybe not helping her here.

NARRATOR: Well good taste goes a long way.

Apparently this is an ornament, an ornament to what I'm not entirely sure.

It's like half a hedgehog.

NARRATOR: Just to make things a bit more interesting, look who's turned up?

- In we go.

- Let's go.

After you.

Oh, thank you my darling, right.

NARRATOR: At least they won't be treading on each other's toes.

We must find something here.

Absolutely, no it's huge.

NARRATOR: That's just what the others said.

I've just seen a ship in a bottle.

NARRATOR: They didn't say that though.

Made by a German prisoner of war.

Oh, yeah.

Ship in a coffee bottle.

Oh, there's even a picture of the group of prisoners there, all worked on road building.

Oh, yeah, Second World War years.

Oh, that's fantastic.

NARRATOR: Bit pricey, mind, more than you've splashed out so far.

PAUL LAIDLAW: Lisa, do you like a cup of tea?

I do.

Let me show you something.

What do you make of that?

I really like it actually.

This is a great reaction.

I love this.

Picquot ware, not rare but once seen never forgotten and highly regarded.

Apparently-- now I don't drink tea-- but apparently it makes a cracking brew.

NARRATOR: Those were manufactured by a Northampton vacuum cleaner company looking for other uses for its cast aluminum expertise, with added magnesium to give it that silvery look.

What you've got there is a usable-- box ticked-- Always important.

--design classic teapot, .

milk or cream and sugar.

Now what do you think I'm going to ask you for that?

I would have thought, you know, 25 quid at least for these.

16 pounds.

Crazy money, isn't it?

Sold, kid.

It's not exciting.

Now we were talking yesterday morning, which seems like an eternity ago, prebag-- I'm joking, I'm joking.

NARRATOR: Leave it, Paul.

Meaty purchases, big spends, versus safe.

Yes.

This is safe.

It's not necessarily as exciting as a fabulous Victorian rosewood dressing mirror with a landed provenance.

But we've got one of those already.

You're so right.

NARRATOR: That's better, definitely on the short list.

Barry's got his eye on something too.

Is that a little swagger stick?

It certainly is, yeah.

NARRATOR: Well I'm sure Raven can give us a closer look.

Well done, like it, like it.

So, Barry, that was your swagger stick that you liked.

Oh,yes.

Potentially interested in that.

NARRATOR: Plus something on the bottom shelf.

Oh, my good Lord.

I think that's-- BARRY SIMMONS: Oh, my goodness!

What on Earth is this?

It's a World War II, Avro Anson aircraft propeller boss, early twin blade type.

If you wanted a military item.

I can't put it on the glass top.

I wasn't quite thinking of something like that.

It's incredibly heavy, feel the weight of that.

Wow, oh wow, it is heavy.

Very, very heavy.

Do you not like that?

I think that's really cool.

No?

No it doesn't-- It's not floating your boat.

It doesn't, I'm afraid, sorry.

NARRATOR: Worth a try.

Back to the stick.

I think it's a lovely little item.

It's had quite a lot of use, hasn't it?

It certainly has a lot of use.

It must have swaggered quite extensively.

Go on, swagger for us, Barry.

Oh, I already feel three inches taller.

NARRATOR: Oh, Lordy.

Is this silver?

Let's have a little look.

There is no hallmark on there and it's got that sort of pewtery look to it.

So it's probably a silver plate.

What have we got on it?

35 pounds.

What are we like on prices, Raven?

We can do 10% straightaway on that price.

I fell I should have a little wander further.

Yeah, of course, yeah.

Did you want to wander and swagger?

Oh, that would be wonderful.

Now you're talking.

NARRATOR: I think he's keen.

You're looking terribly dapper with your swagger stick.

Thank you.

Oh, look.

Hello.

Who's your friend with the swagger on?

My little officer over here.

And what do you think of that, Paul?

[LAUGHING] NARRATOR: Well that's one way to shop.

But Paul and Lisa do need to find another item preferably by legitimate means.

Is that perspiration?

Probably.

We are running out of time.

And the close proximity of that relatively relaxed-looking opposition isn't helping my blood pressure.

NARRATOR: Especially as it looks like the test swagger went well.

Would you be open to offers on it?

OK. Well I have an offer at the moment of 15.

It doesn't look like it.

It doesn't look we'll get it.

Hold on a second.

The best he can do is 30.

Can I have a chat to him?

Would you mind?

What's his name?

Paul.

Hello, Paul, it's Christina Trevanion here.

What would be your absolute best on it, my darling?

28 is your absolute best.

OK, All right.

Well we're really grateful.

Thank you so much.

Bye-bye.

Thank you, Raven, you're a star.

Right so-- Well that's a little more than we wanted to pay.

Yeah, I mean it is the top end.

What's your thoughts, should we go for it?

Let's go for it.

I've walked around all day, how can I not buy it?

Brilliant.

I think at 28 pounds you've got a deal.

SALESLADY: Wonderful.

- Thank you ever so much.

- Thank you very much.

- Thank you.

Thank you.

NARRATOR: Barry and Christina's work here is done.

But their rivals are still after a final item.

There's one thing there, an art deco Bakelite egg cup stand with the four egg cups, circa 1930s, stylish thing.

It's priced at 29 pounds.

If they give you 10% off it brings it down to 26 pounds.

So we panic buy.

It sounds like they may be cutting their cloth a wee bit.

I'll tell you what, how do you fancy boiled eggs with your cup of tea in the morning?

Always.

Raven will tell you that '40s revival is a big deal, isn't that?

- That is true.

SALESLADY: It's a big thing at the moment.

And that ticks the box, doesn't it?

It does, definitely.

We don't know your policy on a wee bit of haggling?

OK. That one doesn't need too much to be honest with you.

It's not expensive.

I'm happy to give you that.

LISA THIEL: So these little egg cups.

What do you think now in daylight?

They actually look better than they did from behind the glass, definitely.

NARRATOR: She's coming round.

Do you know what we can do on that?

I do know what he'll do on them.

Instead of pricing them at 29, he will go down to 19.

Ms. Egghead, I think that's a no-brainer, as they say.

We're in business, we're shaking hands, aren't we?

Definitely.

We're happy to give you the money for that.

Yeah.

Fair discount on the other.

We go well and we are delighted.

I thank you, Raven.

Thank you very much.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

NARRATOR: Eggy soldiers and a cuppa for 35 pounds in total.

And, with our shopping complete, let's take a peek.

How did you get on?

This looks very lumpy, doesn't it?

My goodness.

PAUL LAIDLAW: How are you feeling, Barry?

A bit nervous now, to be honest.

I'm looking at this.

I think you might have a Heath Robinson contraption underneath there.

Shall we?

There you go.

Oh, that is beautiful.

Rosewood, Victorian, but what seals it is inset silver monogram and Ducal Coronet.

It came from a landed household.

And it's a joy.

This here, I believe, according to my learned friend, is a piece of Royal Dux porcelain with a naked lady on it.

Can't argue with that.

Obviously a beautiful aesthetic going on there.

It is actually relatively practical because you could stash stuff in this shell as well which is what I liked about it.

What's that little thing at the front?

That is egg cuppery, for egg cups for the egghead.

See what we did there.

Ah, I like it, I like it.

Well done you.

Yeah, that is 1930's Bakelite.

How am I doing?

Hey, you're on it.

Well done, Lisa.

I'm going to go sit down for a moment.

Yeah.

What is this?

What's going on here?

This was me going off-- This is Prada.

--on a giant tangent just because I love the bag.

It is actually a camera bag and it's got the partitions inside to prove it.

Right.

Did Paul like advise you on that?

Only after I told them I paid for it.

Oh, really?

Wow, OK.

Right, want to see what we got?

Wait, wait.

Let's reveal all.

There we go.

There we go.

Did you bring magnifying glasses?

[LAUGHING] Well this is a matchbox holder.

Yeah.

It has a beautiful bronze little elephant inscribed on top of it.

PAUL LAIDLAW: I see that.

Copper, copper, copper.

Copper, sorry.

There's a little quotation from Kipling on the back which might upset Lisa.

"A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke."

A cigar will never belt you around the face for saying that.

I would just like to point out that the left-hand team's egghead remembered her script to perfection.

Little hiccup there with the bronze, copper issue.

The fact that bronze and copper-- I think that's 1-0.

We jest, Barry, we jest.

Come on, Barry, wow them, wow them.

We now have a lovely penknife-- Uh, fruit knife.

Oh, two, two-- [COUGHING POINTEDLY] It has been a long day.

Have you been listening to anything I've been telling you?

A lovely mother-of-pearl handle-- Well done.

--in perfect condition.

Yeah.

This is an oven.

An oven?

Yeah, you put test tubes in there and heat things up.

It's made out of copper and it just is a most appealing shape.

Is that copper or bronze?

This is definitely copper.

Oh, Barry, I'm so bad.

You can go off people, you know.

PAUL LAIDLAW: Why the swagger stick, Barry.

Well my father was a captain in the royal Army Medical Corps.

And one famous incident, he was found walking across the parade ground and the regimental RSM saw him.

And because he was such an unruly and unkempt soldier, he gave him such a telling off.

And, of course, then he saw the swagger stick, and he saw he was an officer, and he ended this incredibly brutal telling off with the word, sir.

So it just reminded me of that incident.

- Good luck.

- Well done.

- Good luck.

- Well done, Lisa.

- Well done.

- Good luck.

Well done.

He, come on, let's slag them off, come on.

Their items, they're big.

And one of them is rather ugly.

Oh, really?

What do you think was ugly?

I think that the naked lady, I didn't like that at all.

Barry,really?

But I loved the mirror.

I actually was quite sort of taken with some of them.

That little oven is actually pretty cool.

They have spent a lot of money.

They have spent a lot.

They're going to have to work hard to get that money back.

They've clearly gone for spend small, hope to make reasonable margin on it.

And that will be how you make your profit which is fair enough.

Yeah, it's a good tactic.

NARRATOR: After setting off from Keighly, our celebrities and experts are now heading for an auction in South Yorkshire at Thurcroft.

Do you like my jacket, Lisa?

Seriously Barry, where does one even buy a jacket like that?

And more importantly, why?

Well my son got married a year ago, and he wanted me to run a quiz the day before his wedding.

Right.

And he looked at my wardrobe and said, can't wear anything of that, dad, you're far too dowdy.

I'll buy you a jacket.

I took to it immediately.

I rather liked it.

See, I bought my father a tie to wear to my wedding.

But he really wasn't impressed with that but it didn't have sequins on it.

NARRATOR: Well, watch out auction, in what used to be the cinema.

Wow, look at you!

I feel like I want to start dancing.

Hello, darling.

Right, come on then.

Let's go.

NARRATOR: I wonder what auctioneer, Jodie Beighton, makes of their little collection?

I think the rosewood mirror is probably the star of the lots that have been brought.

There's been quite a lot of interest in the viewing and online as well.

So I expect that could bring us a surprise today.

The sugar caster, a nice pretty thing, nice and decorative, I think it'll sell, but I don't think it will bring any great price today.

NARRATOR: Lisa and Paul were our big spenders with 255 pounds spent on five auction lots, while Barry and Christina parted with a mere 108 pounds also on five auction lots.

Now time for the main feature.

Oh.

Here we go, here we go, here we go.

Quite nervous.

First on screen is Lisa's controversial purchase.

Do we want to talk about this?

Hermes, or was it Vuitton Was that an early Mulberry, was it.

Canon, wasn't it?

You start me 10 pounds.

10 to start.

10 pound start.

5 then if you wish, that's bottom it's 5 bid, 6, 8, 10, 12 14-- Come on, come on.

16, 18, 20, 22, 24.

At 22 in the seats, looking for 24.

Money on it.

It's at 24, 6 I'm looking for.

26 online, 28, Oh.

30.

Come on, Laidlaw, you know nothing.

28 in the room, any more for it?

At 28 pounds, if you're all done?

Last bid at 30 online, 35?

30 pounds on the net, the internet's stolen it from the room.

[GAVEL FALLS] Well done.

That's a 50% margin.

Can I get you a knife and fork and some ketchup for those words you've now got to eat, Mr. Laidlaw?

NARRATOR: Loving your work, Lisa.

I don't care now.

That's it.

We can go home.

I see a new career opening up for you, Lisa.

NARRATOR: Can Paul's vacuum cleaner-related tea set clean up?

Do you like the tea set, Barry?

Sell it to me, Barry, sell it to me.

15 pounds, 15 to start.

10 if you wish then.

Let's get on with it.

Oh, come on.

10 pounds now, 10 I'm bid online, looking for 12.

There we go.

I've got a simple rule, never buy anything you have to polish.

16, 18, 20, 22, at 20 pounds in the room, against you online.

Bids at 20 pounds in the room.

Any advance for 22?

22 another bid, 24, 26.

In the room, 24 pounds, then 6 will you?

Bids at 24 pounds.

All done and sure.

[GAVEL FALLS] A modest profit.

Small step, take it.

Yeah.

NARRATOR: Well it didn't suck.

Hey, this is our first lot, bedazzle me, Barry.

Come on.

NARRATOR: Yes, it's Barry's shiny little oven.

It's good luck, this jacket.

Well if this jacket doesn't bring me good luck, I don't know what will?

Exactly.

Burning it, maybe?

Oh, Lisa.

I'll see 20 for that bottom estimate, 20 pound start.

Yes, come on.

20 straight in, thank you, sir.

22.

Good work.

Any advance now, bid 20 pounds in the room.

Take 2.

Any 2 we're looking for?

It's stuck.

Any advance?

22 at the back, thank you.

24, 26, 28.

Yes.

30, 35.

Ah, I'm in profit.

40, at 35 down the front, 40 we need.

At 35 and away.

[GAVEL FALLS] Oh.

Who knew it then?

There's two people-- I told you there were other people that would like it.

NARRATOR: Who knew?

Barry did.

Time for Lisa and Paul's mirror, the auctioneer's pick.

It's crying out for love, that Mirror.

Is it?

I want people to love it.

I just want them to spend more.

And commission start me on bottom estimate for 30 pounds.

Take 35.

On commission at 35, 40, 5.

Here we go.

50, I'm out 5.

Somebody really wants it behind us.

Bidding in the room.

I've got 50, you bidding 5?

One more?

55.

60 we're looking for now.

60 pounds in the room.

Take 5.

Come on, come on, come on.

65 we're getting it.

70, 5.

We're getting there, we're getting there.

JODY BEIGHTON: At 70 pounds then, 75 we're looking for.

Any more for it?

We're in the room at 70 pounds.

At 70 pounds, if you're all done and sure.

[GAVEL FALLS] Oh.

Obviously doesn't translate into cash, does it?

NARRATOR: First loss of the day then.

Next, another shiny Barry and Christina purchase, the sugar sifter.

BARRY SIMMONS: My favorite item.

CHRISTINA TREVANION: Oh, is this your favorite?

I would bid for this myself if I could.

If you could?

Yes.

You sit on your hands, Barry.

Yeah, I'd better sit on my hands.

I want nothing like that going on.

Sweet thing, will there be 10 pounds for it?

10 start, let's get straight in.

10 to 20 pounds, is that all?

Oh my goodness.

10 to start, and at the back, looking for 12 now.

Any advance?

I bid 10, 12 online, 14, 16-- Come on.

18, 20.

Bid's at 18, 20.

This happened with the oven though, slow build, slow build.

24, at 22 back in the room, looking for 24 now.

24 online, 26, 24, 26.

New bidder, sir?

Are you bidding at 26, sir?

Gentleman's bidding in the room at 26.

Looking for 28 now.

28 bid, 30.

30, you're bidding, sir?

At 30?

No, at 28 pounds, all done and sure for 28 pounds.

[GAVEL FALLS] Number three.

Oh.

Close enough, close enough.

It was a lovely thing.

NARRATOR: One loss each.

Can Lisa calls panic buy do better?

Well the Bakelite a.k.a.

plastic.

I'll have you know that Bakelite's historical and cultural significance far outweighs the fact it's made of plastic.

Yes, yes, you keep on believing that.

Barry, Barry, of its time, Bakelite was really cool.

You, of all people, should understand that at one time something can be really cool, and then all of a sudden be really naf.

10 to start, 5 then, if you wish.

5 in the doorway, 6 in the seats, 8 pounds, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 20, 22.

You bidding at 22, sir?

24, it's against.

22 in the seats, looking for 24 pounds then.

Bids at 22 pounds in the seats, all done and sure.

For 22 pounds, if you're all finished with it.

[GAVEL FALLS] NARRATOR: We're back in profit, just.

Do you wear that whilst you're eggheading?

No.

You should.

This is its first outing on television.

- Oh, really?

- Yes.

It's a special moment for the jacket.

NARRATOR: You should be up there giving it a swagger.

Here we go.

Good luck, Barry.

15 pounds for it, bottom estimate, 15 to start.

Come on.

You can do it.

15 bid, sir, thank you.

16 we're looking for.

Any advance now?

16, 18 online.

It really does look like a posh [INAUDIBLE] online.

I have 20 in the room, 22, 24, 24 pounds in the room.

6 with you.

Elsewhere I've 24 pounds.

Come on.

Oh, come one.

28, 30, 35.

At 30 pounds then, 35 we're looking for.

35 original bidder, 40 sir.

At 35 pounds with the original bidder.

At 40, let's see.

At 35 pounds, if you're all done and sure.

[GAVEL FALLS] Well done, Barry.

Well.

Was it worth 35 pounds of swaggering?

It was worth it for me because I had so much fun with that swagger stick.

NARRATOR: Well that and the profit is what counts.

Next up, the saucy maiden they found out the back.

So is this your favorite item, Lisa?

I really did love the mirror, but look what that did for it.

So I'm going to say that I have warm affection for this, and we'll just see how it goes.

Will there be, start me bottom estimate, 60 pounds.

60 to start.

LISA THIEL: Ah, you're joking.

60, 170 straight in online.

- 170 on the net.

- Oh, wow.

Looking for 180.

180, 190.

Brilliant, well done.

180 I've got.

180, top bid at 180, 190, sir, 200 we're looking for.

- Yeah, there we go.

- Oh!

Bid's at 190 in the room, looking for 200 pounds.

Come on.

At 190 in the room.

200, another bidder online, 220 sir, 240 - We are dead and buried.

- Laidlaw!

JODY BEIGHTON: 220.

We are dead and buried.

240 with you.

All done and sure at 220, room bidder.

[GAVEL FALLS] Well done.

My girl did good.

Well done.

Well done.

Naked lady in the shell, I love you so much.

NARRATOR: Yes, it looks like she's won it for those two.

Has there ever been so much pressure on the auction of a fruit knife?

Well this fruit knife's got a lot to do, an awful lot to do.

But it's small and perfectly formed.

If this makes about 100-- Well, exactly.

It to make about 100 pounds profit, I think.

I reckon your best case scenario is that someone turns up and goes, I need to do something with this grapefruit as fast as I can.

10 pounds, 10 start.

10 pounds start, thank you.

12 I'm looking for.

12 bid over there.

14, 16.

This is your moment for glory.

18, 20.

To shine.

22, 22 at the very back, 24 we're looking for.

24, 26.

Good profit though.

That's brilliant.

I've got 26 back of the room, 28 we're looking for online.

28 bid, 30, sir, At 28 pounds with me then.

This is great.

28 pounds on the net, 30, let's see elsewhere.

At 28 and done.

[GAVEL FALLS] It didn't disappoint.

NARRATOR: No, it did a fine job.

Now they just need Barry's Vesta case to light up proceedings.

I tell you, if we do do it, you can wear this jacket.

Can I?

Can I?

- There's an incentive.

- Absolutely.

Can I?

Let's see 10 for that, 10 pounds for it.

Any interest for 10 pounds?

- Come on.

For the collectors.

5 bid there, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 18 pounds in the seats.

20 at the back.

I think it needs 118.

24, 26, 28, 30, 28 pounds back center.

30 we're looking for.

I have 28 pounds back of the room.

- Come on, come on.

- Looking for 30.

Any advance now?

28 pounds and done.

[GAVEL FALLS] Oh.

Well it didn't disappoint.

So close.

Another profit.

NARRATOR: Great auction with profits all round.

But there can only be one winner.

Well, congratulations, guys.

Yeah, well done to you.

- Worthy winners.

- Well done to you.

- Well done.

- Worthy winners.

Well done.

I mean, defeated by a woman on a shell, I mean.

It was stiff competition, Barry.

NARRATOR: Barry and Christina started out with 400 pounds and made, after paying auction costs, a profit of 18 pounds and 28 pence.

While Lisa and Paul also began with 400 pounds.

But after auction costs they made a profit of 45 pounds and 12 pence, so they are victorious today.

All profits go to children in need.

That was an experience, definitely.

It was.

Never a truer word was spoken.

Personally, I feel like a winner because I got to be with Barry in this.

[LAUGHING] Barry, my love, I can only say, in your face.

No, no, well done.

You needed some bragging rights anyway.

I understand that.

Safer journey, folks.

Yes, same to you.

Who's going to drive?

I'll let you drive on the basis of, I've already won once today, go on.

Oh.

NARRATOR: Those two have definitely cracked the antiques road trip.

But what about the other way around?

Well we'd love to have them on "Eggheads."

I hope they get a team together and come on.

Yeah, come and see how much we know.

Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough.

BARRY SIMMONS: Couldn't put it better myself, Lisa.

[MUSIC PLAYING]