VO: It's the nation's favorite antiques experts with £200 each...

I love that.

VO: ..a classic car and a goal to scour Britain for antiques.

Yippee!

Have I just done a terrible thing?

VO: The aim?

To make the biggest profit at auction, but it's no mean feat.

There'll be worthy winners and valiant losers.

Am I gonna flip a coin?

VO: So will it be the high road to glory or the slow road to disaster?

I can't believe it, we're rubbish!

VO: This is the Antiques Road Trip!

VO: Yeah!

VO: It's leg three of our trip in a 1980s Mini with Catherine Southon and David Harper, and the suspension is killing them.

DAVID: Here we go.

BOTH: Oh!

CATHERINE (CS): We're just so close to the ground.

VO: David is an antiques expert with a simple creed.

I think he calls it "blow the lot!"

That's it, I'm absolutely wiped out.

VO: Catherine is an auctioneer whose slightly more cautious tactics have been equally unsuccessful thus far.

So get your money spent, missus.

No, I will, I will.

Well, I haven't got an awful lot to spend, to be honest!

Neither have I.

Depressing, isn't it?

We're rubbish, you and I!

DAVID: In fact... VO: He has a point.

In fact, after 10 shops and over 100 miles things have gone a bit... well... flat.

(AIR HISSES) VO: Catherine started with £200 and has made a measly £2.16.

Huh!

And David's not much better.

His starting stake of £200 has crept up to just £231.24, leaving him a whisker in front.

There's lots of colors.

I'm going with the midweek stubble look.

Go and buy yourself an antique cutthroat razor.

Oh, nice one, you'd like that, wouldn't you?

Yeah, I'd like to do that.

Mmm.

VO: Our trip begins at Eccleston in Lancashire.. ..and heads south for about 350 miles through Wales and the West Country to Seaton, on the south coast of England.

Today's jaunt makes for an auction in Llanelli, but starts out at Rhayader in mid Wales.

This is the Elan Valley reservoir, just outside the town.

CS: We've got our own Victoria Falls in Elan Valley.

VO: And it's also one of Wales's finest bird sanctuaries.

Oh look, a red kite!

DAVID: Oh my Lord.

Look at that!

CS: Wow.

VO: In Rhayader itself, it's the town clock which rather grabs your attention - well, it is shopping time.

CS: Oh yes.

That's what we want.

DAVID: We want antiques.

VO: Let's see what they can uncover in what was once the local court.

Go!

No.

No, that's not fair.

You are a sneaky one.

I know I am.

VO: Nowadays of course, this place is full of antiques.

But they still have the old lock-ups.

It's not very nice in here though, is it?

VO: What's more, David's been here before.

Good to see you, how are you?

And you.

Fine, yeah.

Good.

VO: The shop that is, not prison.

Catherine and Sara are new cell mates.

But David and Robin have previous, and that may give him an advantage.

DAVID: It's a temple piece, isn't it?

It is a temple piece, yeah.

I would say it was India.

DAVID: Yeah?

ROBIN: Yeah.

VO: Possibly used as an altar.

It's an interesting thing, I've got to say.

It's a hardwood, isn't it?

Yeah, it's quite solid, it's heavy.

DAVID: Is it very heavy?

ROBIN: Very heavy.

Deeply carved.

Gorgeous columns, can you see how it's been painted as well?

I mean that, when it was first created... Would have been very, very bright.

Would have been as bright as my pants.

Not quite!

VO: That comparison probably wasn't blasphemous, but do be careful David, we are in a court!

This is a very, very risky object, let me tell you that.

Because this is the kind of thing that could just totally and utterly bomb in auction.

VO: Sounds like David's trying to get the price down to me.

Only trouble is, it doesn't have one because Robin's only just put it on display.

And now you're gonna lay offerings to me?

I'm gonna lay an offering to you... Gosh, I think would 80 quid buy it?

DAVID: Seriously?

ROBIN: Yep.

To you.

DAVID: Seriously?

ROBIN: Seriously.

To you.

Could I have bought it for less money, Robin?

No!

Because you've done business with me before.

VO: Whoops!

Did Catherine see that?

DAVID: Catherine...

I'm just...

I'm just interested to know if you're making an offer on something.

Robin and I just... CS: Don't let him rob you.

There is a cell... DAVID: Well, I'm surprised they let you out, missus.

Ooh!

VO: David's quick work seems to be unnerving her.

It's looking like déjà vu all over again.

VO: Do you remember when Catherine accidentally spied another David buy?

Maybe I should have gone for that.

VO: Hm, this could be interesting.

Gorgeous, gorgeous.

CS: I don't like this at all, because he's sold something to you very cheaply.

DAVID: Well... CS: Have you?

I don't know whether it's cheap, it's very, very risky.

But you're happy and I don't like it!

I know.

VO: Now come on Catherine, pip-pip!

Right.

Mr Harper, this is war.

Ooh.

VO: That's the spirit!

SARA: What about this screen?

Oak framed sort of pressed copper, isn't it?

But it's not special, I want something special.

OK, alright, I'm gonna wander round.

VO: Well, get a wiggle on cuz David's already got something else in his sights.

DAVID: That is... ROBIN: That's a nice piece, that.

(RINGS CLEARLY) Beautiful, sir.

That's a very, very good piece of glass.

VO: Keep the volume down, David!

In this shop, your rival's never very far away.

I think he's already buying another item, I haven't even bought anything yet and then that starts to worry me!

And I get all upset.

VO: Oh lordy.

DAVID: So that's... That's a 19th century goblet or vase.

What I love about the engraving is the scene.

Yeah.

That's what makes it, yeah.

I mean, these fishermen that I deal with will spend big money on anything to do with fishing.

What kind of money is that, Robin?

The death on it is 50.

50?

Yeah.

It couldn't be just a trickle, just a trickle less?

Not a trickle.

Seriously?

That is, that is on the knuckle.

Yeah.

Is she watching me?

CS: I am watching you.

She is watching me!

I could sense your eyes.

Leave me alone, David, I'm getting all stressed.

OK, Robin, do it very quietly, don't say a word.

But what I'm going to do, just as a celebration, right, I'm going to do this... (RINGS CLEARL) And if we can just hide that somewhere... VO: Two buys - and just over 20 minutes later, David's done.

Thank you very much.

Once again, thank you.

I'll see you later, Catherine.

Thanks again, Robin.

All the best.

Cheers.

OK, bye.

VO: Plus, Catherine - not surprisingly - seems to know exactly what he's bought.

He's such a cheeky monkey, I don't know how he does it.

He's going to make a whopping great profit with what you've just sold him.

He's probably going to make about 150 quid on that, I should think.

Probably a bit more, actually.

Oh, good(!)

VO: Ouch!

Maybe cut out the jokes?

Oh... VO: Now it's Robin's turn to give Catherine a hand - and hopefully she can stop worrying about what her rival's already nabbed.

ROBIN: That, you would make money on.

I don't really like it.

No.

VO: Come on, Robin - keep trying!

How about a nice Charlotte Rhead plate?

CS: This is just boring, isn't it?

VO: Please yourself!

ROBIN: You'd be better to take something like that little chair.

CS: But I just can't find anything quite special.

If it was special, it'd be a lot of money.

And if it is unusual, it's already gone.

VO: That's helpful!

CS: I think that's lovely.

Beautifully etched, isn't it?

It's lovely, and there's an awful lot going on there.

VO: Aye-aye?

CS: But it's got the name of Peter Chambers, whoever he was.

And as such it's gonna put a lot of people off, isn't it?

ROBIN: It will do.

VO: Oh dear!

Nothing's quite right, is it?

ROBIN: Yeah, the little copper drinking...

They don't rock your boat?

CS: Turn of the century, I would have thought.

Copper, sort of Arts and Craftsy in style.

I mean, they're simple, and you can imagine them all lined up, if you had a nice inglenook fireplace, you can imagine them all lined up.

ROBIN: £10 the set.

CS: They're quite nice, actually.

Right.

Fiver on those.

Go on then, yes.

VO: That is good.

You're lovely.

There you go, your first little buy.

What would you sell them for, normally?

Those?

I had them up for about £80.

VO: Blimey, Catherine - he has been kind to you!

This is all taking a while and we might be a bit longer yet.

Because Catherine, encouraged by that last deal, is back at the goblet.

CS: It's really beautifully etched, isn't it?

Really high quality.

But what could you do on this?

Not a lot.

£80.

You really couldn't do any less than £80 on it?

No.

I paid too much for it.

CS: My best offer, 40.

No, the best ever on it would be 60, I'd take £20 loss on it.

Would you?

Yeah.

VO: Sneaky!

CS: How much did David pay?

ROBIN: 50.

Could I pay 50 for that?

And then... Only because we've got a competition, and then we can see who's actually bought the best piece of glass.

Go on then.

Am I asking the world?

Yes, you are, but I will do it for you cuz you're so pretty!

VO: She's finally got a smile on her face.

CS: Bye!

DAVID: Oh... Eventu-ally.

My goodness me, what have you got in there?

Don't try and be all friendly with me, Mr Harper!

I know what you've got... VO: Well, she may have been an awfully long time about it, but Catherine's spent less than half as much as David.

And now, can the tortoise and the hare power the Mini up through the mountains?

Heading east from Rhayader towards the little village of Abbeycymhir... ..where David's come to see a very unusual home.

This is The Hall, built in 1833 and then enlarged into a Victorian Gothic Revival mansion a few years later.

By the 1990s though, it was in a very sorry state and David wants to see how the present owners have restored it.

Hello.

Welcome David, welcome to The Hall at Abbeycwmhir.

Thank you very much, Paul, isn't it?

It is indeed.

And I can see already, that is a feast.

VO: It certainly is.

Grade II listed and with original features in all 52 rooms.

The Hall is now open to the public, thanks to Paul and his wife's boundless enthusiasm.

Not to mention life savings!

Loving this.

Now, this is original, isn't it?

Totally.

But we're not slavish to 1869.

This is a house that's full of interest and quirkiness.

VO: He's right you know - this home is most definitely not "stately".

It's too much fun for that - take the snooker room, for example.

DAVID: Now, I do like this billiard room.

VO: Original features aplenty here - like the ceiling with the vents for releasing the gentlemen's cigar smoke.

And it also features a bizarre Arthurian theme that was all Paul's idea.

And round the wall here were the knights of the round table in Old English script.

There is a historian that claims this is Camelot.

What?

This is getting even wilder and wilder here, Paul.

PAUL: Cuz he was a 5th century Welsh prince, so we've created the Arthurian room.

That's great.

VO: There are plenty of other weird and wonderful additions too - like the safe from the custard factory where Paul used to work.

Visitors, we always ask them to describe this when they leave and they can't.

Well, I'm struggling.

It's almost like an adventure playground.

Something that is fantastically eccentric, very British, and puts a big smile on your face.

VO: I suppose that having rescued the place, Paul quite rightly wants to put his stamp on it.

Goodness knows what the National Trust would make of Paul's little collections though.

King Henry and his wives.

Yeah.

And here is some Thunderbirds heads.

Are they Doulton?

They are Doulton, there's not too many of the around.

No, I can tell you, they're pretty rare.

I can value them for the look around the house.

VO: Even the library has a cheeky secret or two.

Here's the only boys and girls' adventure library in Wales, and all in their original bindings.

This is the way the world should have been, but never quite was.

I think people like you should run the world, I think it'd be a happier, more jolly place.

I'm not sure that David Cameron would agree with you.

I don't know.

VO: But perhaps the best illustration of Paul's Tracey Island philosophy is the garden room.

And now for something completely different.

VO: Featuring 136 original signs, and goodness knows what else besides.

This is our childhood.

When people come here, memories come flooding back.

It's bonkers, that's what it is, it's absolutely bonkers.

Well, you ought to know!

VO: Do you know what?

Thinking of Thunderbirds - Catherine and David don't half resemble Lady Penelope and Parker.

Nighty night, m'lady.

CS: We are right in the thick of it!

I know.

VO: Next day, our two just can't get enough of those Welsh mountains.

CS: We're on top of the world, David.

Top of the world.

Are you feeling on top of the world?

Cuz I think we pretty much are.

We keep climbing.

VO: Yesterday, David really leapt in, spending £130 on a temple piece and an ale goblet, leaving £101.24 to spend today.

While Catherine spent a mere £55 on another goblet and some copper pots, leaving her with £147.16 to spend today.

You're so pretty.

Oh, I'm getting wet now.

Oh my God.

My map has other uses.

Well, have we got two maps?

No, get your own.

VO: They're heading for an auction in Llanelli, but the next stop is the little village of Penybont... ..where Catherine's about to visit a unique shop which many regard as a blueprint for modern retail.

Aha!

Thomas Shop.

Hello Thomas Shop!

Hello!

I'm Catherine.

I'm Derek, hello, welcome to the Thomas Shop.

Thank you very much indeed.

I'm oozing with excitement, this is wonderful.

VO: When Derek came to Penybont 12 years ago, he discovered that there had been a successful business here as far back as 1730.

Not just selling groceries, because the original owners established a drapery and a gentleman's outfitters, as well as an inn, a coopers and a blacksmiths!

DEREK: The shop was having to provide something for the whole community.

This was the precursor to the development of a department store.

See, that is fascinating, isn't it?

How it then developed into this mass thing that we see today.

Not that you'd get today, a grocer's, necessarily, with...

I mean, it's a bit of an odd combination... Marks & Spencer's do it.

That's true.

VO: Nowadays, reminders of those departments are squeezed into this gloriously eclectic collection - the Thomas Shop is packed with goods stretching back over 200 years.

CS: This is fantastic, I love the packets, I love the tins, the jars, the pots.

Because really, they tell us about social history.

I love the adverts on them.

I mean, take this one for example.

Colman's tin.

DEREK: Colman's mustard, yes.

I presume it would have been used in a shop, actually...

It would have been a display, yes.

..once upon a time.

VO: Although right now Penybont doesn't have a village shop... ..the establishment that Mr Thomas bought in 1799 was a thriving concern.

It then stayed in the family - perfectly preserved - until closing in the 1950s.

When Derek set about restoring things, his biggest problem was finding some stock.

DEREK: People over the last 10 years have come along with all sorts of things that you see on the shelves.

For example, I mean, we got this collection of shoes, a man drove into our carpark and said "I've got three boxes in the back of the car"... And he just gave you all... And they look like Victorian... ..and he gave us these shoes, and they're Victorian shoes.

I mean, I'd never, I'd never seen a hobnail boot before.

No, I've never seen one before either.

Because the nice thing here is that we encourage people to pick them up... And touch them, not like a museum.

VO: Also in the collection are objects which might never have been sold here - but are, nevertheless, fascinating pieces of social history - like the Welsh Not.

This brings tears to the eyes of many people who speak Welsh.

Does it?

Why's that then?

Because children were forbidden to speak Welsh in school.

When children were found speaking Welsh, they were made to wear the Welsh Not - "you will not speak Welsh".

CS: Ah, really?

And so they had to wear it...

Round their neck?

Round their neck.

Gosh, that's terrible, isn't it?

VO: The hated Not was introduced in the 1870s, and lasted until the 20th century.

Altogether a very different state of affairs from what we have today.

Welsh as a language is growing, and it's very exciting.

CS: So could you speak a bit of Welsh?

I'm sure you could speak a bit...

I mean, bore da.

Bore da, bore da is hello?

DEREK: Good morning.

CS: Good morning.

DEREK: Ti'n iawn?

CS: Ti'n iawn?

How are you?

Ti'n iawn?

Fine, thanks.

How are you?

Bore da.

Bore da.

VO: Hmm, could be useful when she gets down to some proper shopping again later.

Time to go climbing... ..and travel south from Penybont towards the Beacons and Brecon.

Now, I'm sure this fine old market town has produced many famous sons and daughters.

But the Duke of Wellington, apparently, isn't one of them despite his rather prominent statue.

Still, perhaps his influence will rub off on our two combatants.

CS: Well, I've decided that it's no good just buying these piddly things at £20, 30 and making £5, £10 profit, is there?

DAVID: Oh, I'm with you.

I'm with you.

Because it's just not going to get us anywhere.

And we both really need a big push.

DAVID: We do.

CS: So today, I'm going for it.

DAVID: Oh, I love that.

CS: I'm going to risk it all.

VO: Fighting talk, eh?

And they can safely park the car for a few hours now because they're going to battle it out in Brecon.

Ah!

The cavalry!

DAVID: It's the back of a fire.

I'm sure.

Whoah, my gosh!

Probably the 18th or 19th century.

That thing would sit in the back of the fire.

It's cast iron, it's absolutely monstrously heavy.

VO: And there's another one.

This is probably more interesting.

Dated 1635.

If that really is in period, an early 17th century fireback, it's worth £1,000 of anybody's money.

That's dated 1635, do you think that's period or not?

I would say so, yes.

Really?

VO: Tony's standing in for the owner and doing a great job.

But it's time for a closer look.

It'll be a monstrously heavy thing.

TONY: It is, very, very heavy.

Shall I get one side?

TONY: Urgh!

DAVID: Yeah, got one side.

Now you can.

There you go.

Look at that.

That is... A beauty.

..one big heavy lump of cast iron, Charles I royal coat of arms.

What do you think, what's your instinct?

I wouldn't come out of Queen Victoria's place, would it?

It might have done.

That's what I normally tell people!

Do you?

Yeah.

It comes out of her abode.

That's how we manage to sell things.

Ah!

I wouldn't be admitting that, Tony!

Do you know what I think?

I think it's mid 20th century.

Could be, could very well be.

1950s.

VO: Well, that at least puts them within David's price range.

DAVID: What kind of money are they?

TONY: I would say over £100.

Oh, really?

You wouldn't get two for one here then, would you?

That was yesterday.

Really?

Oh, you'll get a big deal here.

Two for one deal?

Cheaper than Asda's yesterday.

Never.

That was only yesterday, mind.

Tony, would you mind giving him a ring and just... Not at all.

Give me a price, give me a price.

Excuse me a minute.

Cheers, OK.

It might be 20 years old, but it doesn't matter, for the right money, as a decorative object, it doesn't matter.

I was way over with my quote.

Good man!

£55.

For the two?

TONY: Each.

DAVID: 55 for the two.

No, each.

DAVID: That's not bad, for the two.

55 each.

Sorry.

Is there any movement on that, do you think?

I think I could go down to... ..45.

Can I officially put that on hold?

No probs.

Don't sell it to the Southon woman, right.

Yeah, she's not allowed to buy that.

OK. VO: Those are getting cheaper all the time.

I wonder how Catherine's doing.

Bore da.

MAN: Bore da.

Bore da.

VO: Ah, she's made a good impression there.

Hello Catherine, I'm Lynton.

I own the center.

Right.

So you're the man to do the deals with?

LYNTON: Yeah.

CS: Excellent.

OK.

Fantastic.

LYNTON: Any help, give us a call.

We'll see if we can do a little deal.

OK. VO: Soon, Catherine, having taken note of what's Lynton's, has found something she quite likes.

CS: It's very sweet.

Do you know what I think it was?

I think it might be for microscope slides.

LYNTON: Yeah.

These drawers I think once upon a time were filled with...glass microscope slides.

Solid mahogany.

These little bun feet on the bottom, that would probably date it to about 1830, 1840.

VO: The ticket price is £195 though.

It'll take more than a little Welsh small talk to get that down, girl.

Can you do £100 on it?

No.

Right.

OK.

I'll give you a bottom line on it, I can't go less than, what, 120.

CS: You couldn't do 110?

Go on then.

For 110.

110.

Erm, I'm not going to commit just yet because I'm just going to have a look at the other shops.

VO: I think Lynton expected a handshake after that lot.

Just one thing...

If that Mr Harper comes in sniffing around, please don't let him have that for any... Don't let him have it, full stop.

And don't give him any big discounts.

He might offer me 195 for it.

Yeah, but don't take it, cuz we're friends.

We're pals.

VO: Well, friendship's one thing, and antiques are quite another.

Meanwhile, David's got his dealer on the line and he's spied something else.

There's a very simple little Chinese rice bowl.

Um, 19th century thing.

Is it buyable at 20?

OK. And while I've got you on the phone, the big fire back.

Tony said 45.

Could it be just a little bit less, or..?

40 quid, OK, that's fine.

OK, thank you.

Bye.

Right.

The little Chinese thing, he said I could have it for 20 quid.

OK, yeah.

But put that aside for now.

VO: So that's those two reserved at £20 for the bowl and £40 for fireback.

Wow.

Good man, cheers, Tony.

OK. VO: Because Brecon does have quite a few antique shops, it looks like our two intend to play the field.

See, I like this.

We've got an umbrella stand, or a walking stick stand, and it's a big lump of cast iron.

I think this would look smashing in a lovely country house.

It's very sort of rococo, the style of it, I love the shells, I love the grapes.

And there's a lot of sort of swirls and patterns in it.

VO: But at £48, there's a bit of a fault.

CS: What can you do on it?

40.

Bearing in mind that would be taking a bit of a gamble.

That would, but I still think there's quite a lot left in it, especially at auction.

But not at 40.

I'm struggling now a little on it.

I think a very, very fair price would be 30.

If you could do 35, then yes.

I think £30 is a really fair offer.

I'm still not biting yet, am I?

Go on!

Shall we see what else you can find?

Let's have a... Let's see what else, and then we can put that with it.

VO: Good idea, girls.

There's plenty inside after all.

Ah, now David's discovered the Antiques Centre.

Mm.

Hello there.

Hello.

OK just to have a wander round?

Course you can.

If you want any help, just give me a call.

VO: So no Welsh badinage for him.

Just straight to it.

I wonder how long it will take this time.

DAVID: Just a little... carrying box.

VO: Not very.

See, always I'm drawn to Oriental things.

And that is Chinese.

It's possibly 19th century, let's say it's circa 1900, and the fact it's got things in it and they seem to belong, that's Chinese.

That's Chinese.

Pair of water buffalos, hand carved, they're worth 40 or 50 quid.

There's a lot going on there.

Now then, is it priced with its contents?

That's the thing.

90 quid.

VO: Actually David, that's just for the box.

I might speak to him about that.

What would be sensible, for the lot, everything?

Everything that's in it, I'd do it for the 90 quid for everything.

VO: Not bad.

But remember David's already reserved those two items up the road.

DAVID: I've got £41, and so many pennies, right.

So I'm thinking, how about if we take out the prints, take out the brass, and the gaming boards.

And then we put in these two little characters.

Is that ever going to happen at £41 and something pennies?

Never?

No.

Cuz the box cost me more than that.

Did it?

OK. Um... DEALER: Give me a profit on the box, and you've got a chance.

I've got to have 50 quid at least on it.

It's just giving me a profit.

VO: Time for a rethink.

If he wants the buffalo, he might need to forget about that Chinese bowl.

So, my offer to you now is £61.24 for the box and these two fellows.

I could do that.

That's hard.

It's hard, I know, I know.

Yeah.

DAVID: And if I had more, if I had one penny more... Yeah.

..I would give you the extra penny.

Yeah.

That is literally me, completely and utterly washed out.

Is it?

Go on.

Go on then.

Do it?

Yeah, go on.

Good man, thank you very much indeed, thank you very much.

Alright.

OK. VO: I think that was £40 for the box and the rest for the couple of buffalo.

DAVID: £61.24.

There you go.

MARTHA: It's the one underneath.

CS: Is that a nice one?

VO: What about Catherine and Martha though?

I wonder if she's found anything to add to her umbrella stand.

I like that display cabinet there with the rose going right through, it's pretty, isn't it?

Yeah, it's lovely, it's one of my favorites, and it's cheap.

How cheap is it?

35.

CS: That's quite nice, isn't it?

Now, this is 1950s.

I would have thought it came in as a piece of pretty boring brown furniture.

But what's happened is Martha's painted it up to look more sort of shabby chic.

But the problem is... ..you would go along to buy this in its brown state at auction.

Dealers would, they'd pick it up for 30 quid, then transform it, as Martha has done, and probably sell it on for... 70 quid.

So I think really it would be pretty foolish to buy it and then send it back to auction.

VO: Quite possibly, but that doesn't seem to have put her off taking a closer look.

MARTHA: It's been here... Oh no, that's not going to go in.

Got a bit of a problem here.

VO: Another problem, eh?

Are you sure, Catherine?

I've got a key somewhere.

There's absolutely no reason why that shouldn't sell.

VO: Apart from all those we've already heard about, that is.

CS: What can you do on it?

28.

VO: Remember, Martha still wants £35 for the umbrella stand.

CS: So would you do the two for 50?

Go on then.

Would you?

Yes.

You're very definite about that.

Maybe I should do a bit less.

VO: Hang on!

I tell you what I'll do.

Mm hm.

I'll give you 45 in cash.

48.

I'm gonna shake your hand, because I just think it's got to work.

Well done.

Right, here we are.

OK, there's 20, 40... VO: This probably isn't the moment to point out that at this rate she won't be able to afford the little mahogany cabinet she reserved earlier.

Thank you very much indeed.

MARTHA: Bye bye.

CS: Bye bye.

DAVID: Tony!

TONY: Ah!

VO: This is turning into a Brian Rix farce.

40 quid.

£40, that's what we said, thank you very much.

VO: So, David's now got the fireback he reserved which means he's once more spent the lot.

But Catherine's "big push" is a bit bogged down.

Oh dear.

Oh dear, oh dear.

VO: She may have almost £100, but that's £10 short of the price she agreed on the little cabinet.

CS: Argh!

Panic!

VO: And time is running out to find something else.

It's 105 quid!

God, why's that so expensive?

I've gone from feeling quite confident to getting desperate, which is what I do best, actually - desperation.

VO: I wonder what the Iron Duke would recommend.

Ah, the Antiques Centre again.

Hello, I'm back.

TONY: Hello.

Hello.

I've got a problem.

VO: What's Welsh for "pretty please"?

This is all I have in the world.

Oh don't... Don't be like that.

If it's under 100, don't even bring it out, my love, cuz I told you what it cost me, I can't let it go less than that.

Look, 20, 40, 60, 80, 90, five, six, seven, eight, nine, and 16 pence.

That's all I have in the world.

Sad, isn't it?

VO: Oh, Lordy.

CS: It's only £4.

But that's, that's... Yeah, but I'm in negative equity now.

It's not even £4, it's £3 and...

I know, but that's £3 less than what I paid for it.

Oh go on!

TONY: Gosh.

Yeah, go on.

OK. Alright.

I think I'm gonna do...

I just need to breathe for a minute and think and reflect.

Now, is that going to make something at auction?

VO: Don't dither, Catherine.

He's doing you a favor!

CS: It really should.

TONY: Beautiful little piece.

It really is a beautiful little piece.

VO: Thank goodness for that!

You know what?

I'm gonna go for it.

I'm gonna do the deal.

Thank you very much indeed.

It's a pleasure.

Ooh, you're lovely!

Thank you.

VO: What a nice man.

Bye bye.

Have I just done a terrible thing?

I don't know!

VO: Right then, let's have a look at what they've got.

CS: Are you ready?

Dah dah!

Oh ho hoh!

Well hello.

OK. Well, you've got a cabinet which has been upcycled, it's been painted.

CS: Yes, it has.

But don't you just love the rose?

DAVID: Erm... CS: Mirrored rose going right down?

Do I?

I don't... Do I?

Should I?

Do I?

VO: No, he doesn't.

They've found the key though!

That's nice.

That's gorgeous.

I don't know whether it's Victorian or not, but it's certainly got a Victorian look, hasn't it?

1850 to 1870 in its style.

And stick stands always do well, there's always a home for a stick stand.

I do like the goblet, I do like it.

I'm not in love with the copper pots.

I mean, you've bought them for profit, I can see that.

You know they're gonna make profit.

Well, I hope I bought everything for a profit!

No, but you know when you buy something with your heart, cuz you love it.

CS: You don't really like anything, do you?

DAVID: I do, I do.

CS: Come on then!

VO: I think Catherine's right.

Now, it's her turn for a spot of faint praise.

DAVID: De de, de de, de de.

You know this one.

You see, we're so different in our tastes, aren't we?

I know.

I can appreciate that.

It is, I mean it's quite grand, but it's na ve.

Yeah.

Personally I don't like it, cuz it's just not my taste.

Yeah.

But that doesn't matter, because you'll make a profit on it.

VO: What about the fireback then?

CS: It's dated 1635, but it's not.

DAVID: Positively not.

CS: It's just a modern copy.

It's a fireback.

Well, it's a 20th century.

CD: It's the sort of thing that's probably going to make you £10, isn't it?

Maybe 20.

Yes, I...

I have a feeling it might make more.

VO: She's decided to tell it like it is.

Water buffalos, very important creatures in Chinese culture.

It's cheap and nasty!

It's hand carved, it's Chinese.

CS: Yeah, but it's... DAVID: A pair of.

DAVID: You don't rate them?

CS: No, do you?

Yes, I do.

VO: Well, if that's what she says to his face... DAVID: What about my box?

VO: Not much, I'm guessing.

You're feeling it.

It's OK, and it's a 40 quid box.

That's about exactly what I paid for it, 40 quid.

Right, OK. VO: Come on!

Let's get down to comparing goblets.

DAVID: We've got mine, which is incredibly heavy, and... (RINGS CLEARLY) Oh!

Heavenly.

It's plain, it's simple, it's sophisticated, it's refined.

Do you really think that's very finely done, honestly?

Look at the quality of the etching.

DAVID: I think the etching is not the finest in the world.

That is much finer, is it not?

For me it's too fussy and Victorian.

CS: We will see what the Welsh prefer.

Shall we give them a little ting?

(BOTH RING) Have it back.

I'm going to have mine.

You can have yours back.

Put the better one down here.

VO: But what did they really think?

Mr Harper's temple piece is amazing.

I am incredibly jealous of it and I think it will make a really good profit for him.

Quite upset about that.

The 1930s painted cabinet with the rose is truly horrifying, it really is, and I've seen them sell for £1.

I thought David was a little bit harsh on my items.

All of a sudden, we're really getting to one another.

DAVID: Looking at Catherine's items, I think mine are just so superior, it's unbelievable.

VO: After starting out at Rhayader in mid Wales, this leg of our trip concludes with an auction at Llanelli in the Welsh valleys.

DAVID: Here we are, this is it.

Welsh Country Auctions.

VO: Did you know that one of Llanelli's local heroes was the Concorde test pilot Brian Trubshaw?

He was always Mr Cool, Calm and Collected, but how are our two feeling right now?

Come on, you, let's get this over and done with.

Are you excited?

You are, come on.

VO: Today it's antiques and effects day at Welsh County Auctions.

So, while the Llanelli locals scrutinize the goods, let's hear what auctioneer Richard Williams, thinks about what Catherine and David have acquired.

RICHARD: I think that the painted display cabinet is totally going to bomb out, I'm sure.

It's one that I was surprised to see, so it's definitely not going to...

I would be surprised if it sells at all.

The temple piece, quite unusual really, can't say I've seen anything like that before, so I couldn't really tell you what that will be expected to fetch.

VO: David started out with £231.24 and, as usual, he's spent it - all of it - on five auction lots.

DAVID: If we could just hide that.

VO: Catherine began with £202.16, and she's also spent it all on her five lots.

Llanelli's ready!

They've both been bold, but will it pay off?

OK, you're on now.

Right, here we are.

VO: First up, Catherine's bargain set of pots.

10 I'm bid, at 10.

£10.

At 10, 15.

At 15.

20, do we have another?

Oh, 20.

25.

30.

Five.

At 35.

Centre of the room then at £35.

Any more?

Well done!

Well done.

That's quite good.

VO: A positive start, but no-one's getting carried away.

CS: We've still got a long way to go though, haven't we?

DAVID: Bid better.

VO: Next, the buffalo Catherine so admired.

So which one's cheap and which one's nasty?

10 I'm bid to start at.

10.

15.

At £15.

At 15.

Come on.

At 20.

At 20.

Any advance on £20?

Come on, come on!

It's right in the center then at £20.

20.

David!

Stop smiling.

VO: Oh dear - that'll be quite a lot more after commission.

Goblet challenge time.

Catherine's up first.

My stomach's just done a huge flip.

Mine too, mine too.

20 I'm bid, at £20.

At 20.

For the presentation goblet.

At 20.

Five.

At 25.

Handsome thing.

Come on.

Come on!

30.

At 30.

Once, twice?

No.

No!

At £30.

VO: Another loss.

Someone's got a bargain.

CS: That was far too cheap, he was gutted to sell that.

VO: Goblet challenge: part two.

How will David's fishing version fare?

20 I'm bid.

At 20.

30.

Five.

40.

Five.

Come on.

You've won the goblet challenge.

At £50.

At 50.

VO: Better - but still a loss, really.

We need a bit of oomph, don't we?

We need some oomph!

VO: David's slightly battered Chinese box now.

10 I'm bid, at 10.

£10.

At 10 for the document box, 15.

At 15.

£15.

20.

At 20.

Five.

30, just in time.

At 30.

Right in the center, 35.

Come on, go on!

At 35, are you sure?

Ooh!

Can't believe it.

I can't believe it, we're rubbish!

VO: He has a point.

Only joking!

Now, Catherine got this for almost half price so surely there's a profit here?

At 50.

Did I hear a voice?

60.

70.

80.

And I've got 90, rostrum bid at 90.

Five.

At 95.

100.

Please, 100.

At £100.

And five, 110.

And I've still got 115 and 120.

At 120.

DAVID: Ooh!

At 120.

At 120, no more?

All that hard work, all that stress, David!

I know, but it shows that it was a very good buy.

VO: Yes, it does.

She might be getting the upper hand here, David.

Now for a slightly more questionable buy - the auctioneer certainly had his doubts.

Any offers for the cabinet?

Must be somebody that likes it.

No.

No?

£5?

Nobody at all for the cabinet?

Well, we'll just have to pass it by.

No.

VO: We'll say no more, shall we?

Oh, sweet pea.

Aw, I'm sorry.

VO: Can David make a profit with his royal fireback?

10 I'm bid, at 10.

£10.

15.

At £15.

At 15.

20.

Should make £100 really.

At 20.

Five.

At 25.

At 25, nothing to think about really.

30.

35.

At 35.

At 35 for the cast back.

Oh, God!

CS: Have you made a profit on anything?

DAVID: I don't think so.

VO: No, he hasn't, actually.

No.

VO: Catherine's last stand.

She could win today!

20 I'm bid, at 20.

At £20 for the cast iron stick stand?

Come on.

Come on, what's the matter with them?

All done then at £20.

VO: That's a blow.

David's star buy.

Could this 'altar' everything?

20 I'm bid, at 20.

20.

30.

At 40.

At 40.

50.

60.

At £60.

All done at £60.

60.

VO: Well, someone's happy at least.

I can't believe it!

I can't believe it!

VO: That's it for a disappointing auction.

And Catherine is the winner today.

CS: Just awful.

DAVID: Let's go, don't worry.

CS: Awful.

DAVID: Don't worry, love.

Don't worry.

CS: Awful.

VO: David started out with £231.24 and after auction costs, he made a loss of £67.24.

So, he now has just £164.

Catherine began with £202.16 and after paying auction costs, she lost £34.06, leaving her with a narrow lead and £168.10 to spend tomorrow.

Lovely smile.

Come on.

Oh, David!

Let's go shopping.

Oh, I don't know if I want to shop any more.

We have to absolutely pull something out of the hat, missus, you know that, don't you?

Cuz we are rubbish, come on.

Whahey!

That's it.

CS: You, you're... DAVID: Go on!

Reverse it!

I am reversing!

No, I said you were clear, not OK to stop.

Shush.

Oh.

VO: Next time on the Antiques Road Trip... Catherine plays the game...

This is going to make the difference.

VO: ..while David plays with his toys.

Can we have a look?

Too small.

(GASPS) Zephyr!

Thank you.

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