[Davina] For thousands of people across Britain, someone is missing from their lives.

[woman] I just want to know, did you think about me?

Have I been in your thoughts?

Have you tried looking for me?

[woman] I don't deserve children.

I gave one away, how could I?

I can't imagine what it must be like to have a mum.

Finding someone when the trail's gone cold can feel like an impossible task, but that's where we step in... Oh, I can't believe it!

Oh, my goodness!

...offering a last chance to people desperate for help.

Got a photograph of her.

With no idea where our searches will lead, we've travelled the world, uncovering family secrets and finding people that no one else has been able to trace.

[woman] She's beautiful.

I hope I can be that mother for her again.

[Davina] And finally, answering questions that have haunted entire lives.

[sobbing] This week, the search for a brother given up for adoption nearly 70 years ago.

Having to choose between two children must have broken her heart.

[man] He is my brother.

He's been missing for a very long time.

[Davina] And a son unable to embrace his future without his mother.

I just really need my birth mother to be part of the rest of my life.

[dramatic music playing] [Davina] Our first search comes from Cumbria and a brother and sister desperate to carry out their mother's wish.

[woman] There's a huge need to find Bryan.

From those words Mum said, it's like a nagging voice, "you must find him, find Bryan."

[man] I need to know that he's okay and that he's fine.

Because after all, he is my brother.

[birds singing] [Davina] Seventy-year-old Colin Deering and his younger sister Helen Salmon grew up never knowing their mother had given up another son for adoption.

It was a secret that she kept from them for most of their childhood.

Mum wasn't able to talk about her past and you learnt not to ask any questions.

Colin and Helen's mother, Nellie Dixon, was a music hall performer touring the north of England when Colin was born in 1943.

[Colin] She was actually a tap dancer and contortionist.

My mum was touring around the country at that time so Aunty Nora and Uncle Harry looked after me.

I think at first I wasn't too sure who my mum was.

We went to the theatre and there was this beautiful lady on the stage and my aunty saying, "That's your mum."

You know, brings a lump to my throat thinking about how beautiful she was.

A few years after Colin's birth, Nellie gave up show business and with her young son, moved back to her home town of Manchester.

In 1949 she married Colin's stepfather and Helen was born two years later, the second of four more children.

But life away from the stage was difficult for Nellie.

[Helen] It must have been a total change of life for her.

She had been used to the bright lights and the glitter, the makeup.

You know, if you can imagine coming from the sunshine and then going into the house, it was doom and gloom.

Here it is, my bedroom.

It wasn't until he was a teenager that Colin began to sense that it was more than just the bright lights that his mother missed.

[Colin] When I was 14 or 15, being in bed early, I used to creep through the hallway and look through the crack at the television and I'd catch Mum go to this drawer and pull out a photograph of a young child in a high chair and have tears in her eyes, and I wondered who the child was.

And when I asked Mum who it was, she said, "It's you."

And I'd think, "If that's me, you know, I'm here, why are you crying at that photograph?"

It just didn't look like me.

But when Colin left home to join the army at the age of 17, the truth was revealed.

[Helen] The day that Colin left, we went to the front doorstep.

[Colin] It looks so small.

Well, Mum was there and I was there, I remember.

And you... well, everybody was crying.

[Colin] I was stood on the doorstep with my little suitcase and was saying goodbye, and Mum turned round to me and said, "Colin," she said, "You know the photograph that you kept asking me about that was in the drawer?"

I says, "Yes."

She said, "Well, that's your brother Bryan."

And Colin's face just sort of drops, and he said, "Another brother?"

She said, "Yes, you have another brother."

-Come here.

-[sobbing] [Colin] All the questions I could've asked and didn't.

I wonder where, you know, where he is, how he is, what's he doing now.

Colin only returned home on leave a couple of times, but by then Nellie had become very ill. Not long before their mother died in 1970, she had one final request.

One of the last things I can remember Mum saying was that Colin really needs to know Bryan, and yes, we've got to find him, we've got to find Bryan.

Driven by their mother's wish, Co lin and Helen began searching for their brother.

We assumed that Bryan was my full brother because he was born in 1945 whilst Mum was on the stage.

[Helen] We assumed that when she split up from Colin's father, she had to decide whether to be an unmarried mother with two children or whether to actually try and make some sort of life for her and Colin.

I'm sure she wouldn't have given Bryan up lightly.

And having to choose between two children.

It must have... must have broken her heart.

But after years of searching, Colin and Helen are no closer to finding Bryan.

[Helen] I would like to tell Bryan all about Mum, and I'd love to do it for Mum.

Because I'm sure she would've loved to put her arms around him and tell him why she done what she done.

We all love him and he was loved by his mum.

[Nicky] Colin and Helen's search for their brother has been hampered by not knowing the name he was given when he was adopted.

Hi.

Working with an adoption specialist, we were eventually told that their brother's Christian name had remained the same, but he was now called Bryan Westwood.

But that wasn't the end of the trail.

No trace was found for Bryan Westwood in this country, but the search did lead to a member of his adoptive family who revealed that Bryan had moved away in the 1970s, to South Africa.

[birds singing] A search of public records and social network sites eventually led us to Constantia, a Cape Town suburb, where he lives with his wife Mitzi.

They have three grownup children.

When we contacted him, he agreed to meet me to find out more about his brother and sister.

Colin and Helen have got no idea what happened to their brother Bryan all those years ago.

It was a painful secret only spoken about on a handful of occasions before their mother died.

I wonder what Bryan knows about where he comes from and what he's been told, if anything, about the birth family he's never known.

-[Bryan] Hello.

-Hello, Bryan, it's Nicky here, Nicky Campbell.

Hi, I'll let you in.

Bryan!

[Bryan] Very welcome!

How are you keeping?

Fine.

What a beautiful day.

We're in midwinter here, so you understand why I prefer it here than in the UK.

-How are you, sir?

-This is a very nice winter.

-Good to see you.

-Good to see you.

-Great view of the mountains.

-[Bryan] Yeah.

[Nicky] How do you feel about all this?

The day I was told, I just broke down because I didn't know, and I've never known until that phone call that I had a brother and sister.

Never, ever knew.

I didn't even know my biological mother's name.

So... yeah.

For 69 years, I had kind of kept it in the back of mind that...

I was adopted, so what?

So were thousands of other kids.

How did you find out that you were adopted?

My sister was delegated to tell me.

I was about 10 or 11.

She told me that my mother couldn't keep me on and how they, as a family, had adopted me.

And obviously I didn't know another mum and dad.

So, I mean, so I was quite happy as a child.

I said, "Who is my mum?"

And then she gave me a kind of story that my mother performed in the theatre.

My adopted father was a stage manager.

-Really?

-And he had known my mother, and that's how the adoption was arranged.

Well, your mother, Nellie... Nellie, that's nice.

Thank you.

-I have got this picture.

-Have you?

Yeah.

My adopted dad gave me this box of old photographs from the theatre.

I've got this picture in that box.

But you didn't know it was your mother?

[Bryan] No.

Oh, just... so amazing that, uh... that I've had a picture in my files for ages.

-[Nicky] All this time.

-All this time.

Colin and Helen looking for you is something that they promised her that they would do.

Okay.

I've got a photograph here of Colin and Helen.

[Bryan] Wow.

-He looks a bit like me.

-[Nicky] A lot like you.

[Bryan] Yeah.

Sorry, it's like looking in the mirror.

I love my adopted brothers and sisters, but, you know, there's also blood relations that, oh, they're there all the time, but you've just... you've got to reach out and touch.

And that is what we must do now is reach out and touch each other and then hopefully that we can become part of each other's families again.

[Nicky] They've written you a letter as well.

-That is for you.

-Thank you.

"Dear brother, we have waited so long to say these words.

We suspect all this has come as a bit of a shock to you as it has to us.

We first found out we had a brother the day Colin was looking to join the army back in 1962."

That same year, that's the same year I joined the army, in 1962, and Colin joined the army in 1962.

-So he followed the same-- -Yeah, Royal Signals.

He was in Malaya, Germany, Northern Ireland a lot as well.

I did 12 tours in Northern Ireland.

We must have come across each other.

Can you believe that?

Very, very, very weird.

[chuckles] [Nicky] Isn't it?

"We hope you will agree to meet us.

We hope to see you soon.

Love Helen and Colin."

You wouldn't be able to keep me away from them with a team of wild horses because I really respect what my brother and sister have done for our mother.

And I respect and I am proud of the fact that they have taken the time to look for me.

[birds twittering] [Davina] Before we tell Colin and Helen we've found their brother... our second search brings us to the Cornish coast and a man whose life is on hold because someone important is missing.

[Stephen] I often wonder whether my mother is still alive.

Just what is out there?

Where do I belong?

I am missing somebody that I've never known.

That's the bit that hurts in the stomach.

And it don't matter who you are or how tough you are, it hurts.

The rest of my life is on hold.

I've got to move on whatever happens.

I've got to.

Want to come to Granddad?

Come on.

Adopted at four months old, Stephen Haywood now lives wi th his long-term partner Jan. Good boy!

Despite battling chronic illness for many years, he spends as much time as he can with their two daughters and grandson.

-Oh, nearly!

-[women, clapping] Yay!

But it's not just Stephen who is feeling his mother's absence.

So great his need to find her that its effects are being felt by his whole family.

I decided years ago not to get married until I find my birth mother.

If she couldn't give me her blessings, it would be a little bit of the heart was missing.

Yes, it would be lovely to get married, but there's no meaning without her being there.

I think, yeah, avoiding those situations, and all sorts of different big events, I suppose.

My 21st and my sister's 21st, he didn't come to.

You normally always have your mum at those big occasions, and he hasn't got that.

Not being there is an easier way for him to cope with his emotions.

[Stephen] It would be great to share these things.

But it just doesn't feel right.

Stephen's need to find his birth mother has become more acute in recent years.

[Stephen] I had a major operation that went wrong, and I nearly died, and I remember crying and saying, "Don't let me die.

Please don't let me die, I've got too much to live for."

The surgeon said to me, "We can't believe you survived.

There's something happening in your psyche that's kept you going," he said, "because most people's bodies give up."

I'm adamant what was keeping me going was I'd still got something in my life that needed sorting out.

[Davina] Fifty-two-year-old Stephen Haywood grew up in Australia with his adoptive parents Constance and Anthony.

[Stephen] It wasn't a big deal being adopted when I was very young.

We were a very close family.

Childhood memories really were going to people's houses, and going swimming in the pool, and getting our chopper bikes out and going for a ride down the beach.

My childhood was... was superb.

But at the age of 16, everything changed for Stephen when the family returned to England.

I definitely felt like an outsider, definitely felt like I didn't belong.

I sounded pure Australian, and it just didn't fit.

It was then that Stephen's thoughts turned to his birth mother.

I decided to find my birth mother and find out who I was.

Stephen accessed his adoption paperwork, which revealed his birth mother's name, Sheila Irene Andrews.

To actually see her name gave me in my mind some sort of identity.

He also discovered that it was his mother who had named him Stephen.

I was somebody and she'd given me that name.

I know we must have formed a bond with each other.

Within the paperwork, there were also reasons as to why his birth mother had had to give him up.

"Sheila is one of a large family whose mother died a few years ago.

Her father remarried his wife's sister and there is a second family.

Sheila asks for the baby's adoption because it will give him the best chance in life, and she could not take the baby home as it is overcrowded."

I don't believe she had any choice but to have me adopted.

That paperwork is all I've got.

That's the key to finding her.

Stephen has spent 30 years searching for his birth mother Sheila.

[woman] He has never given up hope that one day he would find her.

[daughter] You can definitely tell that that bit is missing.

After everything he's been through, it is so, so important for him.

He'd love her just to be proud of him and the family that he's got and to be proud of his life.

[Stephen] I hope it will release whatever's tied up.

Whatever this knot that is tied up in here, I hope that it's that little final pull that will pull that apart and probably put a smile on this face.

I just really need my birth mother to be part of the rest of my life.

I need it more than anything in the world.

For the last 30 years, the only connection Stephen's had with his birth mother has been his adoption file, and he's taken that with him wherever he's gone.

But he's never stopped believing that the key to finding his mother is somewhere in there.

Although no date of birth was recorded for his mother Sheila, there was another significant piece of information: her middle name, Irene.

We searched the records for a Sheila Irene Andrews and could find only one marriage in the right area, to a John Apperley in Herefordshire, two years after Stephen was born.

Armed with a new name, we looked for Sheila Apperley and found her.

Mother to four more children, she lives in Herefordshire just ten miles from where Stephen was born.

One of the things we hear most frequently from people searching for their birth mother, and I felt this before I met mine, is that it's at the milestones-- 18th birthday, 21st, wedding, christenings-- that you think about her most of all.

In Stephen's case he felt the absence of his birth mother so strongly that he actually avoided these celebrations and has even put his own wedding on hold.

But what about Sheila?

I wonder if she's thought about these events in her son's life or hoped that one day she might be able to share them.

[doorbell rings] -[Nicky] Hello.

-Hello.

I'm Nicky.

-Hi.

-How are you?

-I'm all right, thank you.

-Good.

Shall we...?

-Yes, come in.

-Thank you very much.

[Sheila] Come this way.

How are you feeling about the fact that Stephen's been looking for you?

I couldn't believe it to start off with.

I thought I would never see him again, never.

It was a hard time.

How was the decision made that Stephen was going to be adopted?

Well, father and my stepmother made the decision.

What, they just told you, did they?

Yep, she said to me, you know, "You're going to... a mother and baby home and you will have him adopted."

[sighs] And... it was horrible.

I can remember it all.

-Sorry.

-No, no.

The matron that ran it, she was awful.

Oh!

What sort of things did she say?

What did she do?

She just... "You, girl, get on and do what you're supposed to be doing," or, "You, girl, go and do this or go and do that."

You were just someone and that baby was going to be adopted whether you like it or not.

Sat with him in the nursery in my arms, and they just take him off you right in the nursery and that's it.

Yeah.

I used to have the nightmares terrible.

You know, it was the same thing all the time.

-What was the nightmare?

-[sighs] I can see a door opening but there's a body and no face.

There weren't many days that I didn't think about him.

He was just a lovely baby.

Blond hair and blue eyes, yeah.

I can see him now.

I've got a photograph of him now.

Oh, my goodness me.

I can't believe it.

Oh, it's wonderful.

I feel overwhelmed now.

I can't believe it.

[sighs] Oh.

I can't believe it.

Where does he live?

He lives in Cornwall.

-Cornwall.

-I don't think he'll feel that his life is properly complete until you're in it.

He always thought about you and he always felt that you should've been there on his birthdays and at Christmas.

It was Stephen's birthday yesterday.

His birthday, what was that like for you?

I used to think, I wonder what he's doing?

I wonder what it would be like just to have kept him, and... [sighs] Yes, I am going to meet him.

I am going to love him.

[Davina] Sixty-nine years ago, Colin Deering and Helen Salmon's brother was given up for adoption.

Since the death of their mother more than 40 years ago, Colin and Helen have been searching for him.

Colin and Helen have been trying to fulfil their mother's wish to find her missing son, and that quest's over, he's been found.

And now they're going to get a chance to build a relationship with the brother that they've never known.

[doorbell rings] -Hi, Davina.

-How you doing?

-Come in.

-Thanks.

-Hi, Davina, lovely to meet you.

-Thank you.

And you.

So I am interested because your mother had asked you to find her son, and obviously she has passed away now.

How important is that to you both?

It's extremely important to me, extremely important.

Not only for her but for Colin and myself.

Yeah, I would really like to see him but wonder what he's really like, whether he's alive, he's happy.

That's right.

And that's the biggest thing, I think.

He is alive and he is happy.

Oh, thank God.

[Helen laughs] That's wonderful news.

And this has come as a huge shock to him because he had no idea he had siblings.

[gasps] -Does he want to meet us?

-He does.

What does that mean to you?

Oh!

It means the world.

It's the end of a journey, the real end of a journey.

And the start of an adventure.

[laughs] A new brother.

Well, a brother that's always been there, but we've never known.

-He's had a great upbringing.

-Good.

He was adopted by a lovely couple and he'd never looked for his parents because he was so happy where he was.

-Good.

-I can understand.

His adoptive father worked in the theatre and was a stage manager.

So, we don't know, but putting two and two together, that's potentially how the adoption happened.

-[Helen] Aw.

-And he had lots of pictures.

And still has, in fact, from the theatre and the group.

And when he was shown a picture of your mother, uh, he said, "I've seen her before."

I'm going to show you a picture.

Does he look like Colin?

[Davina] You can see for yourself.

Oh, gosh!

[laughs] He does!

He does.

[Helen] Ah, bless.

So there's a big, big resemblance.

Oh, gosh!

Interestingly, he went on to join the army and he was in the parachute regiment.

Oh, my God.

The stories-- I did.

I tried twice to join the parachute regiment.

I mean, you'll have lots to talk about when you meet.

-[exhales sharply] -[Helen laughs] -And... -How amazing.

He's written you a letter.

[Helen] Oh!

"Dear Colin and Helen, you can imagine the shock I got when I was informed that you were looking for me after all these years.

The real shock was finding I had a brother and a sister, as I was totally unaware of it."

Wow.

"It was so kind of you both to take the... to take time to bother finding me."

Of course we would.

Here, let me.

"It tells me you are really caring people, and it means so much to me, as I do have a biological family.

Your brother, Bryan."

Thank you, love.

[Helen] Oh!

I'm so happy.

Yeah.

This morning, a week after finding out that their brother Bryan has been found, Colin and Helen will finally meet him.

How did you get on last night, did you sleep well?

-Not very much.

-No, I didn't.

[Colin] My nerves were jangling and... [Helen] Oh, dear, Colin.

-So excited.

-Yeah.

[laughs] -[Helen] Give us a hug.

-Yeah.

-[Helen] I love you.

-I love you too.

-[Helen] Can't wait now, can you?

-No.

Bryan has made the 6,000-mile journey from South Africa to the Lake District to meet his siblings for the first time.

I'm hoping that this leads to a long relationship that we can take into our old age if you like, because I'm fast getting there.

It's going to be strange at first, I think.

-It's a nice strange.

-[Helen] Yeah.

-I can't wait.

-[Helen laughs] [Helen] Me neither.

They're meeting at a lakeside hotel in Keswick, not far from where Bryan's younger sister Helen lives.

[Bryan] I'm a little bit nervous obviously because I don't know what sort of nature my brother and sister have, but they cared enough about me that they decided that they really needed to find me.

Okay.

It's like looking at myself.

Hi, guys.

Hi, Bryan.

It's a long time.

Hey!

-Twin brothers!

-Yeah.

-Wow.

-Aw.

-Looking well, both of you.

-And yourself.

-Yeah.

-Let's go sit down.

-Yeah, let's.

-Oh, goodness.

I got the shock of my life when... -I bet you did.

-I'm sure.

...when they rang me up.

But, my God, when I saw your photograph, that's my brother, that's my brother.

Yeah, there's no mistaking our parentage.

No, no, not at all.

I didn't really know you existed until the day I joined the forces, on the doorstep with Helen, saying goodbye.

Isn't it weird that we both joined the army in the same year?

We both got married the same year.

It's like we've been following twin paths, yeah.

Thanks, young man.

Tell me, I've never met Mum.

Tell me what she's like.

-She was beautiful.

-Oh... -Really, really gorgeous.

-She was tiny, she was tiny build.

-Um, obviously dark hair.

-Always wore makeup.

-Yeah.

-Always had lipstick on.

Always glammed herself up.

I'd have loved to have met Mum.

Well, she's up there smiling right now.

She's doing a big tap dance, I'm sure she is.

You know, 'cause she kept saying to Helen, -"I think Colin should find his brother."

-"Colin should know Bryan."

It must've been real hard for Mum to blurt out that, you know, I had a brother Bryan.

You know, Colin, the way I see it is, I think when she saw you on the doorstep leaving, she said, "There goes my son.

And I've already lost one."

So then I think she thought to herself, "I better tell him now, it might be my last chance."

-[Helen] Yes.

-All of us together now.

I know Mum is, as I say, she'll be smiling up there.

"At last, I can rest."

We're so pleased that you're now part of our family again.

-Lovely.

-We've waited such a long time.

[Helen] I could have squeezed him all day, it was wonderful.

Getting hugs, and now I've got two big brothers, which is brilliant.

[Colin] I felt that part of me has been reunited with part of Mum.

I've just said to my brother and my sister that we must never, ever lose contact now.

To know that he's biologically my brother and she's biologically my sister, then it... it's a feeling of belonging.

Fifty-two years ago, Stephen Haywood's mother gave him up for adoption.

Today he believes he cannot move on with his life until he is reunited with her.

Stephen's been holding back from celebrating all the big events in his family's life because his birth mother has been missing.

But she isn't anymore.

And I wonder how he's going to feel about that and whether he may finally allow himself to feel happy?

-Hey, Stephen.

-Hello.

-How you doing?

-Welcome to Cornwall.

-Come on in.

-Thanks.

One of the things that I found interesting was the fact that you've missed quite a few big family moments because your birth mother can't be there.

I've missed, well, not most, all of the daughters' big things, as in 21st parties and anything along those lines.

That seems so sad.

It is... but I want to meet my mother more than anything in the world.

More than anything.

Well, you can.

We've found your mother.

Oh, God.

Oh!

I've waited for this for 50 odd years.

-Is she all right?

-She is.

It's not like me, I don't do this.

I'm supposed to be the strong one.

[Davina] It's okay.

Do you want to see a picture?

Oh, my God, yes, please.

[Davina] There's your mum.

[Stephen] Oh, God, thank you so much.

She's written you a letter.

"Dear Stephen, when I received the letter telling me that you have been trying to find me for all these years, I was shocked and overwhelmed.

You have always been in my thoughts since the day I had to give you up.

And I believed that I would never see you again.

It was so hard having to give you away.

You were a beautiful baby, with your blond hair and lovely smile.

I'm so looking forward to meeting you and hopefully it will be the start of a very special relationship.

Mum."

Oh, God...

I can throw the paperwork away now and I'll just keep this forever.

Oh, thank you so much.

And now I've got to do everything else I promised.

-[Davina laughs] -Gotta save up and buy a ring.

Weddings, funerals, birthdays.

Maybe people will be sick of seeing me.

They won't want to invite me anymore.

-Jan?

-Hi.

-All right, love?

-I need to see you, darling.

-All right?

-They've found her.

Oh, that's amazing!

Oh, I'm so pleased!

[Stephen] I know it's been a hard 30 years, but you can go and pick your wedding ring now.

[Jan] Oh, my goodness.

That is amazing.

Four days after learning that we've found his mother, Stephen will meet her for the first time since he was a baby.

Are you feeling... nervous?

Like a pack of nerves.

Stephen and his partner Jan have made the 200-mile journey to Ross-on-Wye.

Hey, Stephen.

Hi, Jan. -How's things?

-Nervous.

Are you?

Well, we're ready.

Oh, what's this?

Well, it's a day late, but it's a Mother's Day card.

-That's lovely.

-[Jan] He's missed 52 of them, so... Oh, she's going to love that.

You'll be fine.

I'll look after him, Jan. [Nicky] Hello.

Are you ready?

-All right?

-Yep.

Sheila wants to meet Stephen at a hotel in the village where she was living when he was born.

[Nicky] How you feeling?

How you been?

A bit apprehensive these last couple of days.

I'm hoping that he'll like me.

And I know I will love him.

Trying my best to keep it together.

I can't show her that her son's a blubbering wreck.

[Davina] I don't think she'll mind.

Good luck.

Thank you.

[Davina] Bet you never thought you'd get here, did you?

No, I really didn't.

So I'm going to leave you here, your mum's waiting inside.

-Okay, Davina.

Thank you so much.

-Good luck.

-Okay, bye.

-Bye.

I've waited so long for this.

[Sheila crying] Come on, don't cry.

I didn't want to give you up.

I know what it was like, I know what the times...

I've never, ever had a bad thing in my head about you.

Never, ever.

Anyway, here's a late Mother's Day card.

Oh, thank you!

I'm sorry it's late.

Let's sit down.

Oh, gosh.

I never thought I'd see this day.

Come on.

It's fine.

I'm here now, and you're here.

It's just 52 years.

I haven't celebrated all these sorts of things for all these years because I just wanted you there.

Well, you can do that now.

Bless you.

When we hugged each other, it was genuine.

I could feel her trembling and shaking when she hugged me.

And I probably hugged her a bit too tight, thinking, "You're not getting away now."

[laughing] "It's took this long to find you."

The first of many.

[Sheila] I think the nightmares I used to have, I think they will go.

It's incredible.

It was meant to be, I think, this day.

I just feel I can relax and do all the things that I need to get done in my life.

[Sheila chuckles]