[Davina] For thousands of people across Britain, someone is missing from their lives.

[woman] I just want to know, did you think about me?

Have I been in your thoughts?

Have you tried looking for me?

[woman 2] I don't deserve children.

I gave one away, how could I?

How could I?

She was asleep, and I walked out.

And I've never seen her since.

Finding someone when the trail's gone cold can feel like an impossible task, but that's where we step in... Father and grandfather on the same day.

It's crazy.

...offering a last chance to people desperate for help.

[woman] Oh, I can't believe it!

Oh, my goodness!

With no idea where our searches will lead, we've travelled the world, uncovering family secrets, and finding people that no one else has been able to trace.

[man] Oh, that's her.

She did not deserve this.

[Davina] And finally, answering the questions that have haunted entire lives.

Oh, it's me.

Oh, wonderful to see you.

[Davina] This week two stories of incomplete lives... A mother whose future was transformed with the death of her father.

It was after that that things started going wrong.

And a daughter who has clung on to the hope that one day she will find her mother.

I've just always felt that there is that strong connection between us from the heart and that's what's kept me going.

[dramatic music playing] [Davina] Our first search is on behalf of a mother who has never recovered from the moment she realized she couldn't keep her baby.

[woman] Are you ready?

Steady... Go for it!

"How can you give something away like a life?"

You can't.

But I was made to.

I would have done anything to have kept him.

In 1966, when she was 18 years old, Gillian Carter was forced to give up her newborn baby Christopher for adoption.

For nearly 50 years, she's never given up hope that one day she might see him again.

Gillian lives in Rotherham, not far from where she grew up in south Yorkshire, with Phil, her husband of 42 years.

Their daughter and five grandchildren live close by.

[photographer] Wow!

Gillian grew up an only child in Sheffield, with her mother and father, Edna and George.

Our relationship, mum and I, wasn't wonderful.

Any little misdemeanor, I was made to go into the corner.

She used to pull the three quarter socks down, slap my legs very, very hard, calling me a bad, naughty girl.

She would still say that she loved me, but it didn't come out in her actions.

My dad was always my idol.

He was wonderful, and I was his "peaches and cream" as he called me.

But when Gillian was 13 years old, her father was diagnosed with lung cancer and died the following year.

[Gillian] My dad dying was the most devastating thing.

I think it was after that that things started going wrong.

Over the next few years, still grieving for her father, Gillian grew increasingly distant from her mother and at 16 found comfort in a relationship with an older man.

[Gillian] He paid me a lot of attention... affection... and that's what I desperately wanted.

But then my mother forbad me to see him.

But Gillian went against her mother's wishes and carried on seeing him in secret.

Then she started having stomach pains.

I went to the doctor and of course mother had to come.

He said, "I'm afraid to tell you that you're pregnant."

And my mother said, "We'll talk about this later."

I was so afraid, so afraid.

I mean, God, I was 18, but I was scared of her and what she was going to do.

My mother was so clear in her mind that there was no chance of me keeping him.

He had to be adopted... end of story.

I just desperately wanted to keep the baby.

Gillian gave birth to a baby boy on the 3rd June 1966, who she named Christopher.

[Gillian] He looked just like me.

He was absolutely beautiful.

And he was a big boy.

He was lovely.

She cared for him for ten days before he was taken away and placed in foster care.

[Gillian] I remember on that last day, I got him ready and then the social worker came in and just took him out of my arms.

Like somebody's wrenched me heart out.

And I gave him life... and then I was giving him away.

But shortly before Christopher's adoption was finalized, Gillian was allowed to see her son one last time.

I was pushing his pram around town.

I felt so proud.

And I suddenly thought, "Let's get a photograph that I can keep for the rest of his life."

And I had to take him back.

I desperately want to see him, to give him a hug, and to let him know that I'm not a horrible person for giving him away.

I didn't want to.

[Nicky] Gillian has had no way of discovering what happened to her son Christopher when he left his foster parents.

But information obtained by our adoption intermediary revealed that he had been adopted by a couple in Sheffield and was now called Mark Green.

But this information alone was not enough.

It was only when further enquiries were made and crucially it was discovered what school he'd gone to that the search could move forward.

With this new information, we were able to focus our search and use social networks to trace him.

But there was no sign of Mark in England.

After eight months, the search led us here, to Australia, more than 10,000 miles from where Gillian last saw her son.

But when our intermediaries wrote to Mark, we heard nothing back.

It was only after further attempts to contact him were made that we finally got the news we were waiting for.

Mark was happy to meet me at his home in Adelaide.

Over the years, Mark must have wondered whether his birth mother would ever come looking for him, but I imagine, because he lives so far away from where he was born and adopted, he never actually thought it would ever happen.

But now this is happening.

I wonder how he's feeling about the possibility of meeting Gillian.

Mark has been living in Australia for eight years and works in insurance.

He's married, with one daughter.

[knocks on door] -Mark.

-Hi, Nicky, how are you?

-Very well.

-Nice to meet you.

-You too.

-Please, come inside.

Thanks.

When you found out that your birth mother, Gillian, was looking for you, what went through your mind?

I have never felt any desire to find who my natural parents were.

And there's a reason for that.

I had a beautiful childhood, very, very happy.

My parents were wonderful.

They told me right from...

I can remember that I was adopted, "You're the chosen one," and I have felt like that all the way through my childhood.

But my father died when I was 12, and mum died when I was 20, and for a long, long time I felt genuinely that the word "orphan" seemed to really be appropriate for me, even though I wasn't a child orphan.

I'd accepted the fact that I was on my own and that was just the way it was.

Did you ever, though, at any stage, as a guy in his twenties, or before that and you're a teenager, did you ever think, "I wonder who she is, I wonder what the story is?"

No.

I received a letter from the adoption intermediary, and I never did anything about it.

And then a second letter turned up, and it was at that time that my wife and daughter sat me down and said, "We should perhaps have a talk about this.

How would you feel if you'd had a child and that child was no longer with you for whatever reason?"

And I said, "Well, it doesn't bare thinking about it, it would be dreadful," so she said, "Well, don't you think perhaps this lady's going through that for these past 48 years?"

And the blinkers came off.

Am I right in saying there's a space there that you didn't realize was there?

Absolutely right.

So what happened?

She lost her father when she was a young teenager.

She met a guy, and what happens happened, with her mother from the outset saying, "You're not going to keep that baby.

You're going to put that baby up for adoption."

So Gillian was completely and utterly alone.

I know as a parent that this wouldn't have happened if there'd been any other choice, I know that.

She was with you for ten days before you were put out for fostering, and after six weeks she went round and she was allowed to take you out in the pram just for one day.

While she was out with you, she went to a photographer and got two photographs of you to keep forever, and she said that if you were ever found, that she wanted you to have one of those photographs that she took that day, um... as a token of her love.

I've got it in here.

Oh, God.

That's me.

[chuckles] You know, there are moments in life, aren't there?

-There are.

-And this is one of them.

Do you have a photo of Gillian?

I do.

Oh, God.

My mum.

I have to meet her.

You know, that makes me want to hold her and say to her, "Mum, I'm all right, I'm happy.

You've got nothing to be sorry about."

Whew!

[Davina] I can't imagine what it must have been like for Gillian when she faced giving up her baby.

But now her son's been found and soon they are going to be re-united.

And maybe that feeling of emptiness that Gillian's had for so long... maybe now that can go.

[dog barks] -Hi.

-Hello, Davina.

-Lovely to see you.

-How are you?

-I'm fine, thanks, come on in.

-Thank you.

Thanks very much.

So how long have you been looking for Christopher?

[sighs] I could say since he was born, really.

It never goes away.

You sort of look at people and think, "Is that him?

Is that him?

Is that him?"

To spend 48 years walking around wondering... -It's... -It's all consuming.

It is, it really is.

So I just want to... think that one day I can see him and touch him and know that he's been happy and know that he's forgiven me.

-Well, you can.

-I can?

-Yeah, 'cause your son's been found.

-Really?

Oh, God!

Oh, my God.

He wants to see me?

[Davina] He does.

Oh, I can't believe it.

I can't believe it.

Oh, Christopher.

Is he still called Christopher?

No, no.

He's called Mark.

-Mark?

-Yes.

-Wow.

-He's in Australia.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-He's in Adelaide.

-God.

-He hasn't ever tried to find you.

-No.

Just because he had had such a lovely childhood, so the thing that you wished for him, he did have.

-He did have it.

-Yes, he did.

He was happy.

Oh, darling.

I'm here.

I'm here.

Would you like to see a more recent photograph?

I would!

Oh, my God, I would.

-There's your son.

-[gasps] -He looks like me.

-He does.

[Gillian] Oh, he's so handsome.

Has he got any children of his own?

[Davina] Issy.

Oh!

She's beautiful.

It says "Mum."

Oh, darling.

"Dear Gillian, or should I say 'Mum'?

I have to say that this really came as a bolt from the blue, but the more I have thought about this, the more I've come to realize that you and I deserve to meet each other.

We're family.

It is the way life should be.

No matter what the reason was that I was adopted, I've had a great life so far and would love to share some of this with you.

Moreover, I'd love you to meet my wife and our daughter, your granddaughter.

I'm therefore really looking forward to meeting with you.

Love Mark (your son!)"

Oh, this is the most wonderful day of my life.

Forty-eight years.

Oh, I can't wait.

Our second story comes from Scotland and a woman desperate to put an end to the search she started as a teenager.

[woman] I'm 53 and I still haven't managed to find my mum.

It's like something's missing in my heart and soul.

I just want a cuddle from her, actually.

[bagpipes playing] Sandra MacDonald grew up in Edinburgh, the only child of her adoptive parents, Jemima and Donald.

[Sandra] It was a very cold relationship, but I think as a child you try everything to, you know, think, "Well, this will help them to love me more."

You know, you do well at school, your room's clean, you do as you're told and everything, but it doesn't work like that.

Even at a young age, I always felt there was something missing.

Mind, I was only about five or six, and I remember going out into the street, I'm going to find my real mum.

As she grew up, Sandra's relationship with her adoptive parents remained cold, and at the age of 15, struggling with life at home, she set out to find her birth mother.

The only information she had was that her mother had been in the care of a mother and baby home run by a church.

[Sandra] I went to their offices.

I thought because they were religious that there would be some compassion there.

The man was really, oh, he was so rude, it was unbelievable.

"Your mother's sinned abominably and she doesn't want to be reminded of, you know, all the sin she's committed, and she has to, you know, move forward."

I felt so sorry for my mum.

I thought, if he's like that with me, what on earth has he been like with her?

I never felt anger like that in my life before.

It made me more determined to find my mum.

Despite the unsympathetic reaction she faced, Sandra persisted and eventually, at the age of 18, gained access to her adoption file.

For the first time she knew her mother's name.

[Sandra] It said that she was Mrs. Elizabeth Blair.

I actually felt a bit closer.

It was nice to have a name, but she'd signed it "Mrs. Elizabeth Blair" with Anderson in brackets, and put "M name" above the Anderson.

And I thought, "Oh, yes, that must mean maiden name."

Assuming that the reference to "M" meant maiden name, Sandra began trawling the records for anyone with the name Elizabeth Anderson.

[Sandra] I went through lots of people with her maiden name.

There was over a hundred of them that I've been in touch with and none of them were her.

You just keep hitting dead ends and brick walls all the time.

It's just so frustrating.

I just feel sadness, really.

The only other clue to her mother's whereabouts was an address for a farm in Linlithgow where she had been working when Sandra was born.

[Sandra] I went to the house, the guy said he did remember a woman with a child, but they'd only been there for a short while.

That was all I got.

But it's a nice feeling to think my mum, she's actually been working here and living here and you can just sense it, all the old buildings and everything.

I just always felt that there is that strong connection between us from the heart, and that's what's kept me going.

Nearly 40 years since she started searching, and now a mother herself, Sandra still believes that one day she may be reunited with her birth mother.

[Sandra] You keep hoping something will come up, but it hasn't.

Sandra's search for her birth mother has been remarkable, for the determination she has shown from such an early age and the hours she's spent searching.

But although she had two vital pieces of information-- her mother's name and date of birth-- she got nowhere searching for an Elizabeth Blair whose maiden name was Anderson.

Like Sandra, we couldn't find any matches for an Elizabeth Anderson of the right age marrying a Mr. Blair.

However we did find a marriage certificate for an Elizabeth Anderson Wilson to a John Blair in Stirling in Scotland in 1957.

Crucially, this woman was the same age as Sandra's mother.

If the handwritten "M name" in Sandra's adoption file stood for middle name and not maiden name, could this be the Elizabeth Blair Sandra has been looking for?

With no Elizabeth Blair of the right age on the electoral roll, we searched the death records and sadly discovered that this woman had died in Perth in Scotland in 2002.

Her death was recorded by a daughter, Lorraine.

We wrote to her and she confirmed that her mother was indeed the person we'd been looking for and that she was Sandra's half sister.

She arranged to meet me in Stirling with her sister, Liz.

Sandra's search has been hampered by misinformation, which means that sadly she hasn't been able to find her mother in time to meet her.

But I'm hoping that her sisters, Liz and Lorraine, will give her comfort and also proof that she was in her mother's thoughts.

-Hello.

-Hello.

Hi, Nicky.

I'm Lorraine.

Pleased to meet you.

-Hello, Lorraine, how are you?

-Fine, thank you.

-Hello, Nicky, I'm Liz.

-Hi, Liz.

So, how you feeling about all this?

Just feel sad that my mum's not here, sort of thing.

She will never get to know her or meet her.

When did you first find out about Sandra?

[Lorraine] The night before my mum's funeral.

We got told that night and it was just a shock.

-Who told you?

-My aunt told us.

She was staying with us at the time and she told us then.

At the time I felt sorry for mum and what she'd been through giving up her baby for adoption.

Your mum, was she Liz, was she Elizabeth?

-What was she called?

-Betty.

Betty, right.

So, what was the story, then?

Talk me through-- she was married to your dad... -Uh-huh, yeah... -Then what happened?

-[Liz] We're not really sure.

-We're not too sure.

My dad went to the army for maybe two or three years.

I'm not really sure, but...

But we know what happened, she met someone else.

-Yeah, mm-hmm.

-Can I see a picture of Betty?

-Have you got a picture of her?

-We do, yeah.

We've got one.

That's one when she was younger.

[Nicky] She looks absolutely lovely.

Oh, yeah.

She was always laughing, wasn't she?

[Liz] Smiling.

A kindhearted person.

[Nicky] A picture here of Sandra.

Oh, my God.

[Liz] Oh, yeah, jeez.

Oh, my God.

There's definitely a family resemblance, and it's the eyes.

[Liz] It's gonna be sad telling her mum's not here.

-Mm-hmm.

-Is your aunt still around?

-Yes.

-She's really excited.

She can't stop thinking about it.

Yeah, she can't stop thinking about it.

As she says, "I hope you get her."

Yeah, "I hope you get her."

[Nicky] Do you think she'd speak to me?

I think she would, yeah, yeah.

She'll know more about maybe what happened.

I'd love to speak to her.

[Nicky] Sandra's aunt, Ina Haque, lives nearly 300 miles from Liz and Lorraine near Mansfield in Nottinghamshire.

We got in touch and she agreed to meet me.

Yes, indeed.

That's great, cheers.

[knocks on door] -Hello.

-Mrs. Haque?

-Yeah.

-Hello.

-How do you do?

-Nicky.

It's very nice of you to see me.

-And you.

Please come in.

-Thank you so much.

-It was lovely meeting Liz and Lorraine.

-Good.

They suggested I might come and see you.

-Rascals.

-[chuckles] Rascals.

Uh... just tell me how Betty was feeling around about the time when she... Well, she must have been feeling very sad.

Very sad.

She was pregnant with the baby.

So she went... if you don't mind me asking, so, after that, Betty went back to her husband.

So she met somebody in that period...

I don't know who he was, really, I have no idea.

-No idea?

-Haven't a clue.

The baby was born in Edinburgh and mum and I went to see her.

Gosh, that must've been upsetting.

It was upsetting.

She was a beautiful baby.

Betty came to the window and held her up, and I thought to myself, "You're going through hell."

I saw her afterwards and she just cried and cried.

It was a dreadful time for her.

Very sad, very sad indeed.

So, she didn't want to talk about it.

Neither did anybody else in the family.

What was the baby like?

She had a mop of black hair.

And mum turned round to me and said, "Ina, look at her hair.

She's beautiful."

How much has she crossed your mind?

All the time, years and years.

All my life, really.

I'm quite sure Betty never forgot her either.

Would you like to see a picture of your niece?

You okay?

-You all right?

-Yes.

She looks like Betty.

She looks like her mum.

Yeah, she's got Betty's eyes.

She's very like her.

[Nicky] Imagine how Betty would feel if she was still around and she met Sandra.

She would've been happy.

She'd be saying, "That's my baby."

She would.

Sandra MacDonald has spent a lifetime searching for her mother.

Sadly, Betty died in 2002.

We've shared this news with Sandra without the cameras being present.

But today she's agreed to meet me.

Sandra has a family, and they really want to tell her or share their memories of their mother with her, and hopefully... hopefully that will bring her some comfort.

-Hi, Davina.

-How are you doing?

-Come in.

-Thank you.

Thanks very much.

I'm really sorry that we couldn't bring you better news, uh, about your mum.

But I have brought with me a picture.

-Oh, I'd love to see that.

-Would you?

There she is.

-Oh, wow.

-Betty.

-Oh, Betty.

-Yes.

She looks so happy there.

-She's got such lovely eyes and smile.

-She has.

The person that gave us that picture is your big sister.

Here's a picture of your big sister Liz and your sister Lorraine.

Oh, wow, they're so alike, aren't they?

Wow.

That's my family, my real family.

[Davina] Your sisters have written you a letter.

Thank you.

"Dear Sandra, this is a very difficult letter to write as we are full of emotions.

When we heard the news you had been searching for mum all these years..." Could you read this, please?

-You can't read it?

-No.

"Dear Sandra, when we heard the news that you'd been searching for mum all these years, we were in shock and sat up all night thinking about you and what your life has been like.

Now that the news has sunk in, we're so excited and would love to meet you.

We hope to be able to tell you all about mum, as she was such a wonderful, kind person.

We're so glad you found us and hope that you get all the answers you're looking for.

Lots of love, your sisters Liz and Lorraine."

-Oh, that's lovely.

-Isn't that lovely?

It is.

Oh, thank you.

Your sisters didn't know about you until after your mum died.

-Okay.

-Mm.

[Sandra] I'm glad she was happy and had more children.

But it's a shock as well, learning that my mum's not alive, and then I've got all these siblings after being an only child.

And, uh... it just needs to sink in a bit, I think.

-It's too much, isn't it?

-Yes.

I'm really looking forward to getting to know them and hearing about my mum.

[Davina] Three days after discovering that she has sisters who can't wait to meet her, Sandra has travelled up to Scotland to meet them for the first time.

She'll meet her Aunt Ina later.

I just feel very nervous after all these years to get to this point.

I'm glad to learn more about my mum.

I just hope she's looking down and that she's happy about it.

[Liz] I have thought about mum a lot these last few days.

[Lorraine] Mum would've loved to have been here.

-It's heartbreaking, really.

-I know.

She'll be happy for us.

Liz and Lorraine want to meet Sandra at the Wallace Monument in Stirling, a favorite place of their mother's.

Oh, my God.

Hi.

It's lovely to meet you.

Hiya.

You all right?

You okay?

-We've all got the same noses.

-[laughing] I started to look for mum when I was 15.

-Oh, dear.

-Was she happy?

She was a happy person.

I'm sure she'll be looking down.

She would have loved it.

She would have laughed.

I just felt my heart kind of flip, and I just thought, wow, that is really my sisters sitting there.

It's still a bit strange hearing that word.

They're my "sisters."

[Liz] It's a day I'll never forget.

I didn't see her as a stranger when she walked in.

She's like my mum, she's got the same laugh, I think.

-Same laugh.

-And just cheery.

[Lorraine] She feels like one of us.

Two weeks after meeting Liz and Lorraine, Sandra is on her way to Mansfield to be reunited with her mother's sister, her Aunt Ina, the one person alive who met her as a tiny baby.

I've just pictured in my mind about meeting Sandra for a long time now.

It feels like I'm going to meet my sister again.

I wish she would hurry up.

[laughs] [Ina] Hello.

-It's been a long time.

-Yeah.

It's lovely to meet you.

It's lovely to meet you as well.

I can't believe it.

Oh, dear.

[Ina] Can't believe it.

I can't believe it after all these years.

I know.

Never forgot you.

-I saw you as a baby.

-Did you go to the home?

We went to the home and your mum came to the window holding you.

She had a big smile on her face, your mum.

But her face was red from crying, and I knew that she went through a dreadful time.

Absolutely.

Yeah, I don't blame her in any way for it.

-No, please don't.

-No, I haven't, no.

She never wanted to get you adopted.

Never.

She was brokenhearted.

Anyway, you're back to where you belong.

Yeah.

I do feel like that.

[laughing] -You really do look like her.

-That's nice to know.

I felt we had all just connected like a chain that had been broken and we were all back together again.

When she said that my mum was really happy holding me... that meant a lot.

There's been a space in our life and she's come back and filled that space.

That's wonderful.

[Davina] For nearly 50 years, Gillian Carter has longed to see her son, who she was forced to give up for adoption when he was a newborn baby.

[Gillian] I feel very nervous, but very, very, very excited.

Today, just ten days after learning that her son Mark has been found on the other side of the world, Gillian is finally going to see him once more.

I thought he was gone forever.

Who'd have thought, who'd have thought that we were going to be meeting today?

I just want to hug him.

Just calm down, it'll be fine.

-It'll be fine.

-Right.

Bye, darling.

Bye, darling.

[indistinct chatter] Grandmama... Mark has flown over from Australia with his wife Ali and daughter Issy.

[Mark] I've always been a fairly stoic person, so to have all of these raw emotions starting to bubble to the surface is just incredible.

[Ali] I love you, take care.

-See you guys.

-[Issy] See you.

Love you.

[Mark] If I'm apprehensive about anything, it's how my mum is going to allow me to address her.

Does she want me to call her Gillian or does she want me to call her "mum"?

And I really hope it's the latter.

[Gillian] I was always worried that he thought I'd be awful for doing what I did.

I didn't want him to hate me for giving him away and think that I didn't love him, because I did.

Gillian wants to meet Mark in Sheffield, the city where he was born.

[Mark] I've sort of been practicing in my mind what I'm going to say, and then you realize how futile that is.

I just want to see her, hug her, give her a kiss, call her mum, tell her I've been happy, tell her she has nothing to feel any guilt about whatsoever... and that it's the start of something wonderful.

[Gillian] I just can't believe how I feel.

I'm not nervous anymore.

Oh, my darling son.

It's the most wonderful day of my life.

You're my mum.

You're my mum.

You're my son.

Oh, you're wonderful.

Can I call you mum, is that all right?

Absolutely.

Oh, you bet!

[gasping, sighing] It's been a long, long time, hasn't it?

Oh, this is wonderful-- Shall we sit down?

Oh, God.

Oh, Mark.

Oh, this is wonderful.

This is so wonderful.

-Aren't we lucky?

-We are lucky.

We are lucky.

I just didn't want you to hate me for doing what I did.

-Why would I hate you?

You're my mum!

-For giving you away.

-You are my mum.

-I didn't want to give you away.

-I know you didn't.

-I hated it.

Please don't ever say sorry.

You have nothing to say sorry for.

Thank you.

I always remember that day when I rang the foster parents and you were crying.

Just a baby crying, but that was hard.

-I needed my mum.

-That's right.

-I needed my mum.

-Oh, Mark, this is wonderful.

I can't believe what you're saying.

Oh!

[inhales sharply] -Darling.

-[Mark sobbing] Oh, my darling.

[Gillian off-screen] I just feel as if I've got a warm cloak around me.

His arms, I'll never, ever forget when I walked in to see him.

It was wonderful.

[Mark off-screen] It was this sense of recognition.

I couldn't believe that I felt this connection immediately.

And that was a very, very strange sensation.

-[Mark on-screen] I've got something here for you.

-[gasps] When we found out about the photograph of me that you had taken, and that was just such an enormous thing for me, because... you'd been carrying it around with you ever since then.

-Well, look.

-[Gillian gasping] It's a locket, and in here is that photo.

Oh, darling, what a wonderful thought.

That's absolutely wonderful.

[Gillian off-screen] All this heartache.

It's all gone.

The heartache's gone now because I've got him, got my son.

[Mark] I don't want to let go of her.

This is something that I didn't know I'd been missing, and now it's here, I don't want to let it go.

Oh, my darling girl.

[Mark] Family is the strongest thing.

There is no doubt about it, and I've just found another one.

How could I not be anything but happy?

There she is!

[peaceful music playing]