female announcer: This program has been made possible in part by... ♪♪♪ female: Stay at home.

That is the order tonight from four state governors as the coronavirus pandemic spreads.

♪♪♪ Bruce Dickinson: Can you see me?

Harry Moses: Yes, yeah.

Bruce: How do I get everyone on here?

Oh gosh.

male: Are you on a phone or a laptop?

Bruce: Phone.

Bruce Royer: Swipe your screen left or right.

It'll open up to a gallery view.

Bruce Dickinson: Right to left?

male: Either way.

Bruce Royer: It's either right to left or left to right.

Bruce Dickinson: Is that Kevin Cooper?

Kevin Cooper: It is.

Bruce: Oh my gosh, what's happening?

Harry: Oh my God.

Bruce: Hi James.

male: Got everybody, right.

Bruce: Jonathan Greenberg.

Wow, valedictorian in the house.

Trey Scott: All the cool kids are here.

Bruce: Franklin, give us an update.

Franklin Ruetz: Well, I still exist.

Bruce: How's everybody?

male: We're being good COVID boys.

Playing inside.

♪♪♪ male: We came from the elite to the elite to the elite.

male: It was the top tier of Southern California, which had its own unique culture.

male: My grandfather was a super-prominent physician in LA.

male: My grandfather was in FDR's cabinet, and my father was a producer.

male: Gramps hosted the Academy Awards.

male: It's my privilege to present to you Mr. Louis B. Mayer.

male: My great-grandfather was Louis B. Mayer.

Scott Shepherd: My dad made some really, really good movies, like "Breakfast at Tiffany's."

Christopher Hormel: My great-grandfather built a company in the meatpacking industry.

male: That's my mom with Eisenhower looking at her.

male: Ronald Reagan carpooled me to school.

Bill Taradash: My father wrote the screenplay for "From Here to Eternity."

How do I know that?

Says so right here.

Martin Montague: My father was the top, like, disc jockey in Los Angeles.

Peter Jones: Dad was the CEO of Northrop.

male: Grandpa founded NBC.

male: Brought to you in living color on NBC.

male: I just remember Sandy Koufax, you know, coming out for barbecues, and Lloyd Bridges was, like, my godfather.

Chip Hayes: It's a blessing and a curse to be born into a famous family.

You still had to live under that shadow of how am I going to do what he did or she did.

John Saliba: I mean, just the perception of our, or the lack of perception I should say that we had, we had no idea that we were standing on, like, multi-zillion dollar property.

Within the west side of LA there were these microclimates of class.

I personally was always really aware of the difference between people who lived in Lower Bel Air and Upper Bel Air.

male: For a lot of these people, it was a very small town between the private schools and the clubs.

Bill: Back then, the thing was, you start a family, and if you're rich enough, you hire a nanny.

The nanny takes care of the kids.

You see the kids when you want to.

I was much closer with my nannies than I was with my parents, that's for sure.

Christopher: A lot of times it was my parents' employees who were there when I fell down or, you know, needed someone to hold me.

Peter: I was just looking at home movies yesterday and I was just so aware now that I've been in the world of the extraordinary privilege.

There we were decked out in white, celebrating May Day.

John: I remember May Day in color.

And I remember Kennedy's death day at school and at home in black and white.

male: President Kennedy has been assassinated.

It's official now.

The president is dead.

John: We were in Miss Alice's 2nd grade class.

The principal called us all out and said, "Kids, the president has been killed.

You're all going home."

male: The bubble we'd been living in was beginning to burst, and we saw it all on television.

male: Beverly Hillbillies.

male: GI Joe.

male: Dr. King.

male: This rock and roll group.

male: Lead the marchers to a rally in United Nations.

male: Martin Luther King 20 minutes ago died.

Robert F. Kennedy: What we need in the United States is not violence and lawlessness, but is love and wisdom and compassion toward one another.

Bruce Blakeley: I remember walking down to the kitchen and my mother said that Robert Kennedy had been assassinated the night before, less than a mile from my house, at the Ambassador Hotel.

male: Happening today, 1968.

♪ Los Angeles weather.

♪♪ male: Another nice day, a little cooler today, sunny skies, high near 85, moderate smog, that means quite a bit.

Right now it's 62 degrees in Hollywood.

♪ Elenore, gee, I think you're swell ♪♪ Peter: Some guys talk about what a dramatic year '68 was.

But as 12-year-olds, we're not really thinking, "Look at our place in this dramatic year," and all, we're just going to this new school where we have to wear all this military stuff.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ Peter: The founder in 1900 asked the permission of Harvard University if it would be okay if he named his prep school in Los Angeles Harvard School.

male: Atten-shun!

Peter McCook: We actually commuted in to Harvard every day.

We had a chauffeur.

Chris Smith: The first day we got to Harvard, I see a platoon full of 8th graders charging us.

They leaped on us and threw us to the ground and beat us up.

Mom and Dad really liked the idea of me wearing a military uniform.

Cameron Farrer: I recall seniors throwing dummy hand grenades on the football field at lunch.

Joe Healy: First thing in the morning, they checked your shoes and your belt buckle.

I remember, "Oh, there's inspection today, and I didn't do my shoes, and I didn't do my belt."

They cut your hair if they thought it was too long.

I mean, it was wildly strict.

David Theis: If you were late and you were coming in through the door, Mr. McCleary would come out with his cattle prodder, go... and just say, "Better be here on time next time."

Kevin: I had transferred from a public school, and then I was in this place called Harvard, with all these clearly really smart kids thinking, "Holy, how am I gonna manage this?"

Didn't we have to go to church every morning at a certain time?

♪♪♪ Christopher: I remember sitting next to Brad Leonard in chapel once.

And he wouldn't kneel when everybody knelt, you know, he said, "Well, I'm Jewish, so I don't do that."

And I'm like, "Oh, well, I think I'm Jewish too, but I don't really know much about it."

Franklin: I was so ultra right wing and gung ho and "Kill the Commies" and give me a rifle and I'm ready to go.

Jim Hicken: To Dad, if you weren't a republican, you were a communist.

male: We were doing drills, salutes, military chants.

Christopher: It was pretty cool when we got good enough to actually march in formation, and we, you know, they'd say turn and we turn and they'd say stop and we stopped and we did everything in coordination.

I thought it was really cool.

Cameron: We were 11 or 12 years old and barely 5 feet tall, and walking around in formation with rifles.

It's just hard to comprehend.

Paul Kanin: We had a draft then.

People were just being grabbed and sent to Vietnam to die, cannon fodder.

[guns firing] Jonathan Greenberg: I was so impacted by the Vietnam War on TV.

In 1968, one of the things that happened that year was the Mylai massacre.

That really disturbed me.

And I was trying to make sense of the enormous chasm between my experience and the experience of these kinds of pictures.

I felt this embarrassment or shame at being such a privileged person.

male: Don't forget, LSD has been declared a drug and Nixon a dope.

male: Toward the end of my first year at Harvard, all of a sudden the drill thing was really being kind of ridiculed.

Some kids had flowers stuck in the barrels of their rifles.

They were--around when they were supposed to be doing the drills.

Franklin: And it was time for the 8th grade to start.

The secretary, Mrs. Ryan, said, "Oh, there is no uniform anymore."

♪ This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius ♪♪ Trey: There's a revolution going on, so why not free things up?

We're in freaking LA, California, you know, we're on the west coast.

Peter: Arena rock, the rock and roll was insane.

The Doors at the Hollywood Bowl.

♪♪♪ ♪ Hello, I love you, won't you tell me your name?

♪ Led Zeppelin, Stairway to Heaven.

male: We were placed into the wave of the cultural zeitgeist.

How awesome to see that showing up in our school.

male: Life was happening faster than we could grow out our hair.

Trey: Some better at it than others.

male: We have a lift-off.

Christopher: We just landed a freaking man on the moon.

There was this, if you can dream it, you can do it type of feeling in the country at the time.

male: And suddenly there was a new headmaster, some new teachers.

John Ameer: We were developing this kind of first-rate college prep school while in much of the country, there was so much chaos going on.

Kate Moore: When I started in 1970, they completely had thrown out the curriculum.

We wanted you to be able to look at ideas around you and see the argument inherent in a song, or the argument in a story or in a political cartoon, and be able to make your own argument back.

That was gonna be your intellectual independence.

Jonathan: The traditional elements that defined the school for decades were becoming eroded.

David: The school was now kind of loosening up so much, you had Mr. Colbert teaching us how to make water pipes.

[laughs] ♪♪♪ Chip: By the time we were in 12th grade, we had long hair, we're smoking dope in the parking lots with our music and our teachers.

With our teachers, exactly.

Christopher: The one class that really stands out is Discovery of the Unconscious.

They showed us all those surrealist films, and we were reading Virginia Woolf and Gertrude Stein, and we spent a week on the Picasso painting Guernica.

I would tell people about it when I went to college and they were like, "A high school class?"

You know, I mean, they had us reading Freud and Jung.

Brad Leonard: We read "The Age of Reason" by Jean-Paul Sartre, Andre Malraux's "Man's Fate," "Crime and Punishment" by Dostoevsky.

I mean, it was unbelievable.

Christopher: When I read "The Jungle," I think I was pretty horrified.

I thought it was gross.

I knew that that was our family business.

It wasn't something that we talked much about.

It was pretty eye opening.

Chris Lewis: In the 7th grade, they were teaching you to memorize.

From the 8th grade on, they really gave you the opportunity to think for yourself.

Michael Burnap: I learned English writing from Mr. Rinnander.

He was asking us to do stuff that was clearly outside of my abilities, and he made it okay to fail.

Wayne Woodman: There was a lot of intellectually precocious kids, so the competition, academically, was intense.

David: I just remember being always competitive and always having to do better.

It was like your identity was so tied up in performing.

Kevin: I remember the honor roll, and it was published on the right side of the dean of the lower school's office.

And it had all of our names and it had our GPAs and, you know, I was toward the bottom of the list, and I was like, this won't do, you know, my self-esteem couldn't handle it.

And so I thought, man, I've really gotta up my game.

David: It was a really heavily steeped environment for maleness.

I mean, God, talk about zero room for sexual identity.

male: I really, really did not like the all-male experience there.

Charlie Munger Jr.: I was so glad I didn't go to school with any girls, because to be ignored by every girl, that part of adolescent competitive life just wasn't there.

Jonathan: Being in an all boys school, frankly was weird, and I was awkward with girls, but I was also awkward with everyone at Harvard.

Joe: I just remember an overall sense of homophobia at Harvard School.

This tone of I gotta prove that I'm a man.

Pat McCabe: To be a man then was you have to go to the best school to get to the best college to get the best job, so we can perpetuate this elite class of upper middle class white people.

Bill: I had totally forgotten that there was one black kid in our class.

♪ Montague the Magnificent.

♪♪ Martin: While I was at Harvard school, my father was the top, like, disc jockey in Los Angeles.

I came into the school.

And now I'm in with the ultra rich.

And I figured out that the ultra rich were --holes.

When we were in Harvard school and I'd meet a girl from Westlake, she'd say, "Martin, I really like you, but my parents won't let me date black people."

It's something that I will never forget, Peter.

male: It looks like Martin is coming on.

male: There he is.

Scott: Martin Montague, how are you?

Martin: Who the hell am I looking at?

I don't remember you guys.

Bruce Blakeley: Tell us what you've been up to for the past 40 years.

Martin: Me?

Bruce: Yeah, tell us then.

Martin: Okay, because guys, when I left the school, I went, "See you."

Michael: People did try to befriend Martin, but he was kind of prickly.

He wouldn't accept it.

Chris Smith: When I first met him, he was friendly.

I mean that was his default approach then.

It turned, I think, somewhat during Harvard.

Martin: I had to park my car off campus at the gas station and walk to school, so nobody would hurt my car.

So I wouldn't have my window broken, and a Coca-Cola poured on my seat.

I wouldn't have my beautiful paint job scratched.

Peter: That happened?

Martin: Multiple times.

I told Peter, that '57 Oldsmobile Super 88 that I had, yeah, some of you mother-- were scratching my damn windows and doors with, okay?

Dan Sarnoff: Was that like light beige colored car?

Martin: I had it repainted because it was pink in the first time.

It was a beautiful pink.

Dan: Oh, if it was pink, no wonder they scratched the windows.

[laughs] Jonathan: I was a target.

I was someone who was sensitive and therefore would be victimized.

male: It was a bullying aspect of being there.

Dan: We have some recompense to do, I'm sure all of us, for some of the things that we did when we were in school.

Trey: Franklin Ruetz.

Franklin.

Oh my God, it's awesome.

Good to see you, bravo, bravo.

Frank.

Franklin: As a new kid, apparently I was fair game.

They were putting salt in my milk and then it turned to threats of physical harm.

male: Ruetz, we voted him in as class president as a joke.

Chris: I respected that guy so much because everybody didn't take him seriously.

They thought he was a nerd, they gave him relentless--the guy turns around and runs for class president and gets voted in.

And we all know it's a joke, and he does too, and he doesn't care.

He stands up at the podium, he acts like the class president, he carries himself, and he blows off all the hoots and hollers and the criticisms and everybody making fun of him.

Dan: Wait, is this Franklin's first time on?

male: Yes, yeah, yeah.

Dan: Oh, a virgin.

Franklin: Anything that happened, I would try to diffuse with humor.

I think if I had shown other people more of how my mind worked or where I was coming from, that they might not have felt like I was the target they needed to pick on.

Martin: See, the bad memories are the ones that one always remembers.

Because those are the ones that stick in the mind.

Kevin: I think like a lot of us, Peter, you know, I had a difficult adolescence, and I didn't know who I was and my family was going through a lot of stuff that I didn't really know how to handle.

The way I coped, my defense mechanism was to develop this, you know, happy-go-lucky persona.

I put on this "this is Kevin" thing, like I had the world by the balls, when the opposite was true.

That's what my parents required, particularly my mother, you know, she required me to behave in a certain way or there was hell to pay.

Bill: I wasn't terribly close with my parents.

My parents were nice enough people, but my mother was a snob, and she was proud of it.

She would just look down her nose at anybody who wasn't on an equal footing financially as her.

John: My father was a member of Wilshire Country Club.

He said this guy came in and he said, "Can I use the club to jog in the morning?

You guys open at 7 a.m.

I go from 5:30 to 7, and I, and I'm training for a world heavyweight fight."

So my dad said, and we voted 300 members.

What was to vote?

I mean, he's the most famous guy in the world at the time.

It was 300 to 0 to not allow him to come and run by himself on the private club about a mile from where he was living.

Peter: When it was happening, did you know that life was a little different for us?

Chip: My mom and dad made a point of telling me how lucky I was.

They wanted to make sure I wasn't gonna turn out like some of the kids they knew some friends that, you know, some of their friends had that were rather messed up.

Trey: I wasn't aware of the wealth of most all of us.

That changed as soon as I had a chance to travel with my parents.

That's when I got exposed to real poverty in Haiti in particular.

Everything changed in terms of my awareness of my wealth and privilege.

Pat: When we were in high school, I played basketball in the Beverly Hills YMCA and we would go to 28th Street YMCA in South LA and get our heads handed to us.

It was always in the back of my mind that this was not a level playing field.

The contrast at Harvard School, given how white it was and privileged, it was just very apparent to me, even at that age, that that wasn't right.

John Manulis: When I was growing up, I did lots of things that were illegal.

I used to have fun stealing, like, ski clothes at ski resorts.

I was a white kid in an upper class neighborhood with connected parents, and I got treated as if that's the rites of passage, and that's how you learn your way, and we're going to trust that you're going to come out at the other end fine.

male: All of us were privileged kids.

male: Yes, we were.

Dan: And are still privileged adults, no?

male: Yeah, I can see your house back there.

Dan: My parents had left for China for two weeks for a vacation.

So I said, "Dad, can I have a party, when you're gone?"

And he said, "I don't want anybody in the house."

And I said, "Well, what if everybody's outside?"

"I just don't want anybody in the house."

And I said, "All right, fine."

My cousin was going to USC at the time, and he happened to have been the Trojan, the guy that would ride the horse during the football games.

So he got the Trojan football team to agree to come to the house and be in the house with 6 kegs of beer on the condition that they wouldn't let anybody in the house.

Trey: We all knew there was going to be this big party at Danny's and that he was going to get the film.

Dan: So Chip brought a projector and a 16 millimeter print of "Deep Throat."

♪♪♪ John: Those were the days when there was no Internet.

There were Pussycat theaters and seedy parts of town.

Dan: Between the two fireplaces, we put two bedsheets to make a big screen on top of the house.

We had called a friend whose dad ran Budweiser, and he brought the entire Budweiser truck to the front of the house.

The garden went down a couple levels, and the screening was at the lowest level, and there was people everywhere.

Trey: I was juggling girlfriends at the time, and they were both there at the party.

It was a big night.

There's a lot going on.

God, if those parents knew.

Dan: We didn't realize, the way our house was positioned you could actually see that movie from Sunset Boulevard as you were driving.

6 o'clock comes, and we've got 40 or 50 people there.

By 9 o'clock, there were 5000 people at the house.

Peter: There were 4800 people there.

male: That's hard to believe.

male: Twenty-five hundred that we counted.

David Rosemont: It was wall to wall, it was like nothing I'd ever seen before.

Like, this limitless amount of people.

Dan: And the police were suing us for charging minors for alcohol and offering pornography for a fee.

But the party was a gas.

That was probably the quintessential party of the '70s in America.

John: It's a great piece of mythology.

♪♪♪ John: I think all of us felt at that point in time that I will never be any closer to anybody than this group of guys, because essentially half of our lives at that point from 12 to 18 or whatever, had been spent with them.

Kevin: It buoyed my self-esteem to be one of the top kids, and I've got my summa cum laude thing, you know, that they gave me when I graduated for being one of the top guys in the-- and I remember thinking, I worked hard for that.

Peter: So after graduation, what emotion did you experience most?

Christopher: Profound feeling of despair.

Everything I learned and all my friends and this was over and I was really just empty, you know, like, what?

What now, and, you know, am I gonna make it?

[marching band playing] ♪♪♪ Joe: I go to USC.

The very first class, there's two girls in a skirt on either side of me in class.

I fricking freaked out.

I can't stare at their legs, they would cross them, uncross them, recross them, and I'm just--I'm staring at their legs, I'm looking at them, smelling perfume in class for the first time.

The first month at SE I was such a fish out of water trying to adapt to women.

After the first month of class, I didn't have one page of written notes.

I was too busy just staring at people.

Chris Lewis: College was ridiculously easy compared to Harvard.

I learned more at Harvard than I ever did at Stanford.

Mario Alvarez: I go to the store to buy the book for Math 101.

That same book we used in the 7th grade.

David Theis: The arrogance that I experienced at Princeton was intolerable.

The chumminess, the hobnobbbiness, the tweedy life.

Princeton was creme de la creme, it was rich, thick, and white.

[laughs] ♪♪♪ Joe: All the pressure came from Dad.

He had told me when you graduate, you're off the payroll.

Don't come looking for me.

There was never a thought in my mind about taking a summer off or screwing around for a month.

Paul: We had to measure ourselves against our dads.

My dad and your dad were bigger than life.

John: Your dad was kind of scary.

Peter: Scared me sometimes too.

He sold airplanes to the Pentagon and to defense departments all over the world.

Powerful fathers, did you ever feel like you were competing with your dad or trying to get his approval?

Very rhetorical question.

I mean, now I hear myself asking it.

Scott Shepherd: Yeah, let's see, he died 7 years ago.

I'm still trying to get it.

Pat: The expectation, well, you went to Harvard school and you went here and your family is successful, what's the matter with you?

I think that's crushed a lot of guys.

Kevin: I was working at a summer job and my brother called me.

He said, "You have to come home right away.

Dad killed himself."

I was just like stunned, just completely stunned.

And I walked into my boss's office, I remember this, you know, I'm a, I don't know, 18-year-old kid like just, or just a young man.

Walked into my boss's office said, "My dad killed himself.

I gotta go," and just walked out of the office.

Drove home.

I remember driving home.

I couldn't stop my legs from shaking.

So I was trying to drive, right, push the accelerator, push the brake, and my legs were going like this.

And I got home and found out that my dad had shot himself the night before.

And that was sort of the beginning and the end of my family.

[waves rolling in] Cameron: I'm the second of four boys.

We were raised very competitively.

We fought.

We threw punches.

And our parents loved seeing us be off balance.

They had a affluent lifestyle.

For them it was all about image, but my mom had higher aspirations and it was a difficult reach.

Through her, I saw what money can't buy because she was profoundly sad, and that's where the alcohol came in.

♪♪♪ male: Put your audio on, we can't hear you.

male: You're on mute.

male: Hey, Chipper.

male: Hello, all.

Now I got it.

male: John, Big John.

John Saliba: Bonsoir.

male: Where's your wife?

male: Greatest thing.

[multiple speakers] John Saliba: How about us do a 50th reunion thing?

Wayne: I don't know if you ever have a fond memory of something from childhood and you go, gee, I wanna relive that experience, then you do, and it's like, shouldn't have done that.

John: It'll be the time of our lives and hopefully we're all still alive.

John: The time we had together, it was a peak for me.

I think I peaked at 18 to 21 or something.

I just pursued women my whole life.

I waited till I was 40 years old to get married, and Peter, I really wanted to have kids, so I just said, let's get married, and we were together for 25 years, you know, so that was pretty good, but not devoted to her, and she knew it.

Peter: You weren't faithful to your first wife?

John: I wasn't faithful to anybody, Peter.

I've never been faithful in my entire life to any girlfriends or anybody.

I think this is part of my shallowness that my daughter's trying to bring up in the therapy we're doing now.

My oldest daughter who's basically saying that I was self-absorbed and wasn't a very good father because I just thought of myself.

And now I'm listening to her and trying to acknowledge it.

It's not easy, Peter, it's not easy, you know.

Peter: The first marriage, how old were you?

Joe: Twenty-six, she was twenty-three.

We were living in Laguna Beach.

How many people live in Laguna Beach, their first house after being married, right?

It was beautiful.

She said, "I'd like a new car."

And I said, "What do you mean a new car?

You got a company car, they pay for all your gas.

Why do you need a car?"

She goes, "I want something more up my what I perceive I'm worthy of for the weekend driving."

And I said, "Excuse me?"

She goes, "Joe, I grew up with nice things, and I expect nice things."

And I said, "You know what?

I think you might have married the wrong guy."

But we ended up having three kids.

Having kids, there's, that-- it's so special, right?

It's a pretty amazing feeling.

Michael: I was not a very good husband.

I wasn't abusive, but I was inattentive.

And when my son was about a year and a half year old, she said, "You know, I'm done with this.

I think it's time for this marriage to be over," and I was being oblivious, which I frequently spend my time doing.

And so we spent about 3 1/2 years getting increasingly bitter until finally it just came out that we would get divorced and I would take custody of the kids.

Peter: That's rare to give the father custody.

They make movies about that.

Michael: Yeah, well, that's okay, I mean, I loved it.

I was a single parent for seven years.

It's hard work, and sometimes when you, you know, "I need you to work on a Saturday," it's like, "I got no daycare.

What am I gonna do?"

But I loved it.

♪♪♪ Trey: Oh my God, are you kidding me?

Look at Santa Monica beach.

I slept on that beach numerous times.

Peter: You're talking about in our high school years?

Trey: Yeah, high school years.

Oh yeah, absolutely.

Peter: What were you getting away from?

Trey: I had a problem at home, you know.

My parents were, you know, kind of argumentative and, you know, it was just kind of a place of stress.

♪♪♪ Trey: That ocean and that beach, and those mountains, I mean, I give them as much credit for parenting me as my parents, for certain.

Peter: How old were you when you got your pilot certificate?

Martin: Twenty-seven, I think.

Had flown all kinds of aircraft.

Been in all kinds of aircraft.

I mean, I've been in the second largest airplane in the world.

male: Sitting up front, Martin Montague, an American, taking a ride with the Russians in the 124.

Martin: Flying gave me a purpose.

It gave me a set of goals.

I wanted to get to the airlines knowing I couldn't get there because you know what that means, right?

There were no blacks and no females up there in those cockpits, it's an all white man's game.

It's much better now, but I'm too old because as you progress in age, your chances of getting hired starts to plummet.

Martin: Let's see now, 03151733 looking like-- Martin: I'm one of very few people in the world that can leave the ground by himself, I can soar with the hawks.

They make a left, you make a left.

I'm just another bird.

I'm just noisy.

Yes, and I'm five feet from their wingtip.

Kevin: When my dad killed himself, it was the day before he was gonna lose his job.

I went to business school and I studied real estate, and I went into commercial brokerage, and I went into commercial development.

This is what my father's business was.

I was this very sensitive introvert and I went into this business that really is for ruthless extroverts.

I started having flashbacks of abuse and "that happened to me," and it was like, "I'm not putting my kids through that."

The main thing that was happening is I was getting really angry, and I didn't know why.

And my wife said, "This isn't okay.

You got--" you know, she's not putting up with it at all.

"You need to go get some help."

The process was so amazing to me.

My therapist said, I think you were trying to take the shame out of the family by doing what your dad did when he killed himself.

My becoming a therapist was really about my healing myself.

That's what I realized ultimately.

That's what it was about.

We can deal with it or not deal with it, but it doesn't go away.

♪♪♪ Cameron: You know, my mom, of course, had just a horrendous drinking problem.

I tried to get them help along the way.

Not many people were seeking help for alcoholism.

It was just not a socially acceptable thing.

They'd taken her license away and she continued to drive and my father allowed her to do so.

We're all grateful that she didn't kill anybody, or herself for that matter, but.

Peter: Well, she kind of did.

Cameron: Yeah, she did and she took him with it.

It was not an unexpected event.

My mom had been smoking in bed, which she did, I think, pretty regularly.

The house went up in flames.

I made a profound effort to have a family that's not the family that I grew up in.

I was able to learn from what I saw and know what I did not want to do, and the life that I did not want to lead.

For us, family's sort of everything.

And I consider myself really fortunate.

Christopher: My mother survived some real horrible things as a teenage girl, you know, hiding from the Gestapo, running messages for the underground, so she went through a lot and then married my father.

His life was also a life of privilege and being raised in this important family, and I think that she always felt a little bit like the kind of less important person.

male: I saw my father hit my mom when I was a young child and it's--I'll never forget that, it was terrifying.

male: He was definitely a playboy, so that was like, you know, a role model for me.

Christopher: Men were getting away with the clueless, you know, sort of attitude that, you know, the world is for them.

I learned to have the attitude that women were for my pleasure.

I have had to really face my dark side and recognize, you know, who do I want to be?

Yeah, I'm still working on it.

Peter: When your dad died, now, was that a liberating thing for you?

Christopher: Yeah, he would hurt me on a regular basis.

And he can't hurt me anymore.

♪♪♪ Peter: Hi, Johnny, it's been a while and I thought I would say hello as the sun is setting here in California, thinking about you and sending lots of love.

And I hope we can talk soon.

John: I was doing some research on 50-year reunions online and I came across something I thought was-- Trey: Wait, wait, wait, say that again.

You were doing research on 50-year-- John: Well, Trey, excuse me-- Trey: You're amazing.

You are amazing.

John: Our goal was 100% attendance at our 50th reunion, and if we got to send him a plane, we're gonna send him a plane or whatever we're gonna have to do by that time.

John: You know, this 50th reunion is a huge deal.

John: Let's say we can't get a 100%, we get 98 or 95%.

Unacceptable.

All of us on this call have positive memories, but not everybody has positive memories, you know, and we have to understand that.

Bill: I had a small group of friends, and one day, and just out of the blue, they decided I was no longer part of the group, and they kicked me out of the group, and they were just kind of nasty to me.

When I think about my experience there and my experience here, which is completely different, you guys are great, but back in the day, I was teased constantly and that sort of sticks with you.

I mean, I wasn't, you know, all gung ho to come into this reunion.

John Saliba got me in.

male: How'd he do that?

John: I just bullied the--out of him and then he-- male: That's what I thought.

Jonathan: Brad Leonard was just a cocky, narcissistic, and macho poser.

David: It just felt like he was so cool, so hip to understand things that I didn't understand.

His wit was just like lightning fast.

Peter McCook: He was always speaking his inner monologue, you know, he was always talking and he was a smart guy, and he was always doing his air guitar all around.

Harry: Oh, Dr. Brad, I mean, my God.

I remember when Brad was the trainer for the football team, and, you know, would be wrapping somebody's ankle and telling me that he was gonna go be a doctor.

And I said, "Well, you've got a good touch.

You probably will be great at it."

John Manulis: I always felt that Brad's was a bit of an act.

He had the brains, he had the cleverness, he had the thoughts, he had it all there, but he was--he was pushing it.

Dan: Every one of my companies is always looking for a better idea, or a better product.

And you never know, between the-- male: Hey, look at this, Brad Leonard's here.

Brad.

male: Brad, good to see you.

Brad Leonard: Hello, boys, I'm back.

male: Fifty years later he's here.

That's awesome.

Brad: It's good to be seen, man.

It is good to be seen.

Jonathan: Brad, I haven't seen you in 47 years or something.

How are you?

Brad: I'm doing great.

Pat: I was really, really close with Brad Leonard.

I don't know what to say about him other than I kind of saw it coming.

The pressure at home, you're going to Princeton, you're gonna be pre-med.

They were telling him all this.

Brad was kind of a time bomb.

Peter: So Brad, give me one humbling experience that you've had.

Brad: Oh, I'm a recovered alcoholic.

I went from being an assistant professor of cardiology at Harvard Medical School to drinking gin out of a 7-Eleven cup and shooting up meth in a few short years.

No family, no job, you know.

Hell, I slept in my car for a while and I was one of the lucky ones, man, I recovered.

I had no idea how to connect with other human beings.

I didn't.

It was all facade.

It was all fake, and I was miserable and I didn't know why.

So I had a lot to learn.

I kinda grew up at the age of 41.

Dan: For any of us who have gone or are going through that with our kids, I mean, I'm one of them who had to go through with one of my kids, and it turns out they have to be the ones themselves to want to be helped, not be forced to be helped.

Brad: The cardinal thing is, I don't have a problem.

I can stop when I want to.

My problem is you guys on my back.

That's my problem.

Dan: Yeah, it's always somebody else's problem.

Brad: Oh, dude, it's never my fault.

Dan: I would always tell my kids, there's two kinds of people in the world, really, just two.

There's the kind that trips over the cord and says, "Who the-- put that cord there?"

And then there's another kind that trips over the cord and says, "How did I not see that--cord?"

You have to decide which one you want to be.

Brad: You know, one of my favorite lines a guy said, he goes, "I looked down and I was like, 'Damn it, who peed in my pants?'"

John Saliba: Mr. Leonard, everybody that you see on this screen is going to be at Harvard High School on May 18, 2024.

Do we have your commitment that you will come-- Brad: One hundred percent.

John: You're in?

All right.

Peter: Who are these old people?

male: Hey, Peter.

Peter: Oh my God.

male: Peter, good to see you.

♪♪♪ ♪ Me and my buddy just like to go ♪ ♪ We'll have fun, everybody knows ♪ ♪ We don't fuss and we never grab ♪ ♪ We just groove, taking in the sights ♪ ♪ Me and the boys ♪♪ male: Yes!

John: All right, so, I have a handout.

I mean, we're not messing around.

male: I'll pass it down.

male: You don't look at the back.

John: May 18th, 2024, the school sponsors dinner from about 6 to 8:30 or 9.

What we really got to concentrate is getting guys to commit.

We need housing, and I want to be able to make it as easy as possible for whoever comes.

So reunion attendance goal: 100%.

Next page.

John: If we're down to 5 to 10 guys, I'm gonna go personally and knock on their door.

And if still they say no, then I'm gonna ask them to write a reason why they couldn't come, or why they decided, and I'm gonna read it at the reunion.

And financial is not gonna do it 'cause we're gonna find financial assistance for the ones who use that as an excuse.

So, and that's a huge one, right?

So, and--or "I hated everybody."

Okay, who did you hate?

Give me the names because I'm gonna read this at the reunion, you know, just give me something, just give me something.

♪♪♪ Joe: My mom passed away in December.

I got divorced in October of that year.

My dad, before Christmas, he said, "Joe, I'm lonely."

He said, "Why don't you come live with me and we'll just keep each other company for a while."

So, at 42 years old, I moved in with my dad.

And we had the fricking time of our lives, Peter.

Joe: What do you think of that, Dad?

male: Are you making this a movie or you doing-- Joe: It's just a video now.

male: A video?

Very good.

Joe: We'd double date and it was fricking hilarious watching him date, worrying about, you know, making love to a woman.

I had to get him a Viagra cause he was so nervous and I dressed it all up on a pillow with tissue.

So he said, "You need to find someplace else to go this weekend."

He ended up kicking me out 'cause he got engaged.

He got married and then I got married after he got married, but we had a great time together.

My wife says, "You know, the older you get, the more you are like your dad."

Sometimes I smile at it and sometimes it scares the--out of me.

John: What I have, it's very strange, Peter, is that, it's in my throat, and so I had a big lump here.

And so, the problem with the lymph nodes is then that's what carries through the rest of your body and that's when you get in trouble.

If it does get worse then I'll-- or if it gets like it's gonna be bad, I'll tell everybody, but right now, you know, like, 'cause, yeah, now I'm gonna get emotional.

Peter: Okay, me too.

John: I know, I'm sorry, Peter.

Peter: Hey, I'm here.

John: I didn't mean to.

I just wanna make it to the reunion, you know, that's what I want.

That's my goal.

So, I'm sure--I'm sure it'll be okay, really, thanks.

So I--we can talk about something else.

male: Hey, why don't we talk about something important like how to apply for Medicare or something at 65?

male: I did that.

I'm an expert now.

male: Hip replacements.

Dan: I was at my niece's bat mitzvah, and then my daughters, they made me dance and I pulled my calf hamstring, and I can't even walk on it now.

You know, you think you're gonna retire and go skiing?

No, I don't think so.

You know, I don't know what you can do when you're fricking 65 and you can't even dance anymore without hurting yourself.

Peter: I take ibuprofen before yoga, and then like another one, like, later in the day because it's, like, it just feels like the Tin Man where I'm getting the oil in the joints, and it makes a total difference.

I really feel a difference.

Wayne: What are the values of getting older?

Who the--cares?

Martin: I almost bought a saxophone 2 days ago.

It's something I've always wanted to learn.

Wayne: What are you supposed to do if you retire?

Is anyone actually retired?

male: I am.

Dan: I retired when I left high school.

Bruce Blakeley: What I am fearful of is that when my mother got older, she only thought about the past.

She never thought about the present or the future, and that is definitely not what I want to do.

Peter: Hi, Johnny, it's Peter.

Just enjoying another beautiful Santa Monica sunset and thinking of you.

[phone ringing] John Alison: Hello, Peter.

Peter: How are you?

John: I am alive, I feel generally pretty well.

Peter: How's your health?

John: I have been fit as a fiddle.

The only thing that's a problem is this damn--this damn-- Peter: Alzheimer's, that's the word.

John: Alzheimer's, that's right.

Alzheimer's.

Peter: How's the brain function, does it come and does it go, or is it just something you're aware of or not aware of?

John: Unless something miraculous happens, it's going to get more difficult.

In the meantime, the best thing to do is just laugh, laugh, and laugh.

Laughter is the best.

It makes life quite bearable.

Peter: Let's say I love you today while we can.

Okay, well, I love you and we'll talk soon.

Enjoy the sunsets.

John: Thank you again very, very much.

Peter: Okay, love you.

David: Looking back, I just feel like what a distorted environment to be in.

There was no room to talk about feeling, no room to talk about vulnerability, can't show anything, can't show any, you know, any affection for men.

People would, you know, call you queer, whatever it was, they would call you something terrible.

You had to kind of flex your maleness.

Jonathan: At Harvard School, had you sort of figured out what your sexual identity was or sexual preferences or not?

Peter: I did not know.

It became something where I didn't understand I had this attraction, and I really thought it was a forbidden thing.

I felt there was something wrong with me.

Jonathan: The culture made it so hard.

I mean, it was such a macho toxic masculinity type of a culture.

Carvel Moore: When Dennis Lynn passed away, that was a real shock to me because I'd known Dennis since first grade, you know, best friends.

Dennis was the nicest guy I think I've ever met.

And that was another, you know, we've lost friends since then, but that was one that was like, wow, we're getting older, you know, happens to you now.

John Manulis: I always felt Dennis was like Dennis the Menace.

I mean, I always felt like he was--you just couldn't tie him down and there was always a project and there was always a go-kart, and there was always, you know, something being done in his garage there.

And then, of course, you know, when we got older, there was Boone's Apple Farm wine or whatever in the trunk of the car.

Peter McCook: His trunk was just this portable party bar.

And so after every game, I know we'd go out into the parking lot and he'd pop the trunk and there'd be beer and there'd be, you know, more stuff there.

male: His energy was, no matter what, was a really high energy, kind of a captivating energy, quite charismatic.

You'd see Peter Pan in him.

Peter: We went to gay bars together.

He was exploring.

I think that there was something that always kind of tortured him.

Brad: I think it was too.

I--well, particularly if you remember his dad and his mom, there would be no talk of that in his family at all.

God, what a brutal battle that is, to not be able to be who you are.

Peter: In 1980, we were 23, 24 years old.

After a night of doing cocaine, Dennis talked about how he was the unwanted child in his family.

He said, "I think our dads really are missing out on getting to know two pretty nice, pretty, pretty great guys."

Kevin: Addiction is this thing that I think still has shame in our culture, and it's a shame that it does, because if somebody's addicted, then there's some pain that they're trying to cope with.

I remember him as just a sweetheart, and I imagine quite a sensitive soul, and, you know, those are the people that get hurt the most, right?

The most sensitive.

male: He was a bartender all his life.

Peter: He stayed exactly the way he was in 1973 and the rest of the world kind of changed.

He stopped searching and growing, and I had to move on.

I got help.

He didn't get help and he died of liver failure 12 years ago.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ male: I remembered to record, so that's good.

male: Hey Bill, how are you doing?

male: Hey there.

male: Mr. Hayes, Mr. Saliba, Manulis.

The usual suspects are showing up.

You're not drinking tonight, John?

[laughing] David Rosemont: At this point in our lives, you get a little more reflective.

Scott Shepherd: In October, I suddenly am older than my mother was when she passed away.

Joel Chitiea: I have a daughter who I am estranged from.

Chris: I don't think my parents understood me.

I didn't want that to happen to my kids.

Jonathan: My son struggles so much.

Sometimes he's in a really good place and then an hour later he could be really down.

Pat: The only good thing about COVID has been these Zoom calls and getting to know everybody again.

I miss all of the solitude these days.

I don't feel alone.

Brad: We're dying to actually talk about what we think and feel with no fear of judgment.

Craig Hoffman: I got a completely different impression of what this is all about.

I thought this was all about the airing of grievances.

John Saliba: If we've got 20 years, healthy years, left, that's a plus, right?

The average 65-year-old American last-- lives till about 74, right?

So we have about 9 years left, right?

Bruce Blakeley: No, no, no, no, no.

That's not true.

That's not true.

We got a lot more to go, John.

And if you die early, I'm gonna kill you.

John: I got kind of bad news.

It, you know, I went back for another scan and it seems like this stuff is back in me again, Peter, and, you know, I didn't-- Mona said just stay quiet about it till--because the doctor's still optimistic, but I sure don't feel well and I don't, you know, I'm not--I don't know if you could tell, but I'm pretty skinny.

I feel I've aged a huge amount in this last 12 months.

Peter: How do you deal with this kind of stuff?

Loss, mortality.

Jonathan: Frankly, I don't think about it too much.

Peter: Okay.

Jonathan: It doesn't weigh on me because I'm pretty good at avoiding thinking about it.

My brother Danny, when he was a freshman at Princeton, started to have, you know, the first symptoms of psychotic thinking.

When he was approaching 40, he took his life.

He did it in front of my parents' house.

Part of his illness was deep searching, spiritual searching.

Completely rejecting the class background he came from and feeling more comfortable with people who were not, like, middle class and not working class, but the most down-and-out people.

He had an unbelievable interest in and talent for relating to people in the street, with homeless people and being a homeless person.

We created something called Daniel's Place, which is an outreach center for young people who have their first experiences of mental illness.

Jonathan: People who deserve care, love, and support, and who receive it.

Peter: And then you also created the Institute in San Francisco addressing nonviolence and social justice, two of your favorite causes.

Jonathan: I feel like I have a mission more than I've had maybe ever.

I'm feeling compelled by urgency because there's so many problems that we have in the world, and I'm trying to use the Institute I direct as a way to address those issues through teaching and training people in nonviolence.

John Manulis: My most recent couple of endeavors have been purely about identifying organizations and leaders in the social justice/youth justice area that I think are doing something cool and valuable and saying how can I help?

Cameron: We're living in a very unprecedented time and a lot of people just don't have the bandwidth to deal with it.

But I wanna try to do something for the greater good.

[crowds rioting] Dan: Privileged white boys from the early '70s.

I mean, we are the people that they want to eat now.

[crowd chanting "Time's up"] David Rosemont: As a white male, you feel very exposed, more than ever before.

To be really honest, you feel like, okay, now I'll be overlooked.

Christopher: When I first started in philanthropy back in the '90s, it was basically, if you're a liberal white guy then you can make decisions for everybody else.

I've been that, you know, well-intended white guy all these years, and as good as some of the things that have come out of the American tradition of philanthropy, there is a part of it that perpetuates oppression.

Michael: I've known a lot of black people who've been very successful because they've been very, very good.

Had they had to be better than I would have had to be?

Probably.

Brad: And people say, I don't understand systemic racism.

Of course you don't understand systemic racism.

You've never experienced it.

I can't possibly understand what that's like, but I can be open-minded and listen.

Christopher: The last few years have opened my eyes so much further to the impact of centuries of racism and misogyny and, you know, homophobia.

Pat: I was just the prototypical midlife crisis guy, you know, who had had a lot of success with not that much brain power.

I did have a 23-year career in sports and TV, and I tried to be an agent, and I really didn't enjoy it.

So I became an elementary school headmaster for 12 years.

There was one girl, and she had a terrible speech impediment, but there was something about her.

There was something very, very brilliant about her writing in the 3rd, 4th, 5th grade.

Amanda Gorman: A skinny black girl descended from slaves and raised by a single mother can dream of becoming president.

Pat: The inauguration, were you watching it?

Amanda: For there was always light.

Pat: It was so dreamlike and amazing.

What she was, and what she became.

My biggest regret in life is not having been a teacher and a coach all along.

I would just junk my 23 years in sports if I could have.

John Saliba: We have 55 yes for sures or yeses.

That's pretty good.

What's important today-- male: John, sorry, 55 out of how many?

John: Eighty, we got about ninety.

Bruce: Fifteen are coming.

John: No, no, there are not 15, Bruce.

That's 11 guys, but, and I'm not feeling too good, so it might be 12.

We can just go with that.

Let's stick with that.

Let's stick with the 12.

Okay, is John Alison-- male: Yeah, I would doubt that he'll be coming.

John: Why, why would you say that?

male: He has Alzheimer's.

male: That's premature if he's 60-- John: Chris Hormel?

male: Coming.

John: Coming.

Wow, okay.

If we're seriously at 58 yeses now, and we can-- male: You're gonna lose 10% of that.

John: From--for death, for dying?

male: Just for the way life works when people say--when people say they're coming to something.

John: I'm very emotional, guys, 'cause-- Bruce: It's okay, John.

Come on.

male: What's going on?

John: Well, I don't know what's happening except for the fact that I love you guys and when you said we grew up together, we all grew up together, all of us, you know, it's unbelievable, the chance that we have to do something that is just gonna be special.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ [phone ringing] Peter: How about that pesky Alzheimer's?

How's that coming?

John Alison: It's very slowly sort of melting my mind away.

John: The best thing is to stay close with the people that give you great pleasure.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ John: In the mornings, the bird, they're all singing.

Now look at that.

Oh, see that.

I've had a couple of times where things just begin to go completely off the rails.

There is a truly deeply expressed sense that something has been broken.

So what do you do?

What you do is you build our house and chop our wood and make our gardens grow.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ John: We have so many nice--so many things, I mean, we find these and we conserve these so that they would continue to be alive.

Peter: I hear it in your voice, just a sense of I'm right here right now, and that's all I have and that's all I have.

That's you.

John: Is that me?

Yep, that's me.

No, that, that was me.

That was me for that moment in time.

Peter: Oh, my goodness.

John: Yes, now there.

Yeah, that's the Mayday.

Now this is--that's something.

Peter: Can you believe how white those outfits are?

John: All the pomp and ceremony.

Peter: Remember when we took a helicopter to Disneyland?

John: My oh my.

♪♪♪ John: I mean, we thought we could not be broken.

It didn't matter.

We were going to always make it.

♪♪♪ John: It's so good to be able to have the surprise that comes from seeing people who you haven't seen for a long, long time and finding a way to come back again.

♪♪♪ Peter: So, Martin, our reunion is in May.

Do you think you'll come?

Martin: Probably not.

male: Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to begin our descent into Los Angeles.

Los Angeles weather is clear.

Temperature is 72.

We have enjoyed having you on board and look forward to seeing you again in the near future.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ male: Come here, man.

Come here.

Don't, no, no handshake.

male: Great, look at these guys.

male: Chris Hormel, oh my God, I haven't seen you in 50 years, neither.

John Manulis: People change physically, and some of them have gone through some pretty traumatic things, and that leaves a mark.

But for the most part, the characters, the senses of humor, the ways of expressing themselves, the rhythms, I recognized almost all of them.

Bruce Dickinson: Jonathan, yes, Greenberg, my gosh.

Bruce Blakeley: Hey, Peter.

Peter: Bruce, Bruce, give me some sugar.

John Manulis: Oh man.

So good to see you.

It's like Zoom does not do it.

Christopher: Yeah, yeah.

Dan: Is your dad still around?

Joe: Yeah, 97.

Dan: Wow, my dad passed last year.

male: We go to more funerals than weddings these days.

Jonathan: I wish I had a chance to spend more time with you when we were in high school.

male: I was a stupid kid.

Pat: I was not incredibly close to anybody, really.

There's a self-centeredness and a self-involvement in high school.

But I think by and large, I can't think of anyone in our class who I wouldn't want to be close friends with after all this time.

Christopher: This is intense.

[laughing] ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ John Saliba: My dad passed away a couple of years ago.

He was 106 years old.

I said, "Dad, what's the last thing you can tell me, the very last thing in your life?"

And he said, "Stay close to your friends."

male: I love her.

male: He was the president at the time of NBC coming out to sneak out a cigarette.

male: He was in our class.

He's got a winery.

male: Is that from his?

male: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's his stash.

So you're, you know, you're fortunate sons over here, man.

♪♪♪ male: Your hands are cold.

male: I know.

I'm full of metal since my back surgery.

I run cold.

male: Ladies and gentlemen, could you move this way?

Come on this way, please.

Come out.

male: There were those who touched our lives who would be our same age and some of our friends didn't make it.

These guys who didn't stay as long as us, we're just honoring them and saying, well, we touched each other's lives and we're grateful.

We'd like you to say something if you have something to say.

Dennis Lynn, everybody remember Dennis Lynn?

Pat: He was one of the funniest guys I've ever met, quick and funny and brilliant, and it's a tragedy that he's not here with us.

male: Clay Crouch.

male: Clay was one of my closest friends.

I was over his house all the time.

His mother was a babe.

Kind of had a crush on her.

male: I was lucky enough to be a roommate of Scott Dunbar, and he had it set up like you wouldn't believe.

I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but I think he was the first one to buy a Ford Bronco.

male: So Alfred, because he never rang the doorbell, my parents called him The Shadow.

male: And we look over and there's Clay.

male: Oh my God, we would go out to Joshua Tree.

male: Oh my.

male: Mushrooms.

male: We were young.

We didn't need drugs.

We were naturally high.

Here's a toast to Sean Curtis.

male: Here's to John.

male: John Cannon.

male: To Rick, Rick Wells.

male: John was always a difficult guy to get to know.

I mean, even when he was, you know, 11 years old.

male: When he died, I was angry.

I was angry and I didn't really know why.

I didn't know how to deal with my emotions.

He obviously needed help, and he didn't reach out for help.

Joel: Don was the product of a broken family.

His father was completely absent.

The most poignant thing that he ever said to me was, "Joel, do you know how lucky you are to have a mother and father who love you?"

male: All of us here are so fortunate that we've been interconnected some way or another for over 50 some-odd years.

And it's an amazing triumph of love and compassion and understanding and vibration.

male: I just want to say it was supposed to be 100%.

If you know somebody that didn't show up, shoot them.

That's it.

That's all I said.

Okay, let's keep this thing going.

♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ male: Where's our tour guide?

Peter: These guys.

female: So this is Munger Science Center.

This is where all the physics-- Peter: What year are you guys?

female: Twenty-five.

Peter: Twenty-five!

I was '74, can you imagine?

That was the 20th century.

Peter: My God, I used to run up this.

Now I'm exhausted.

John: Hi guys, youngsters.

Peter: Do you remember smoking pot here?

John: I never smoked dope on campus.

I don't know, everybody talks about it.

Remember when we were in the prone position shooting guns up here?

Peter: I do.

Bruce Royer: Tighter bonds are formed in childhood than they seem to be in adulthood.

I mean, I can look at all you guys and still see you at age 15, you know?

Trey: We have deep roots, and we're adding to our relationships into the future, by showing up and being here right now.

Kevin: I do feel like I've got less runway in front of me than I do behind me.

When I was at Harvard, none of that would ever have occurred to me.

I just, you know, life's gonna go on forever and I'm bulletproof, and I don't feel that way anymore.

male: If you're taller, get behind.

male: You guys are tall.

Brad: Privileged white men who were taught to never ever show weakness, never let them see you cry.

I think we're all dying to share some of the hurt and pain and experience we've had.

male: Forget about the handshake.

Christopher: How are you?

male: Kneel down, guys.

male: They can get down, but they can't get up.

Kevin: Being vulnerable, being authentic, will that be safe?

Will that be okay?

Will that be received?

When we are willing to be vulnerable and authentic and real with other men, there could be some magic that happens.

male: Okay, don't move.

Stay there.

Got it.

[cheers] ♪♪♪ ♪ When I think back on all the crap I learned in high school ♪ ♪ It's a wonder I can think at all ♪ ♪ And though my lack of education hasn't hurt me none ♪ ♪ I can read the writing on the wall ♪ ♪ Kodachrome.

♪ ♪ They give us those nice bright colors.

♪ ♪ Give us the greens of summers.

♪ ♪ Makes you think all the world's a sunny day, ♪ ♪ oh yeah.

♪ ♪ I got a Nikon camera.

♪ ♪ I love to take a photograph.

♪ ♪ So mama, don't take my Kodachrome away.

♪ ♪♪♪ ♪ If you took all the girls I knew ♪ ♪ when I was single.

♪ ♪ And brought 'em all together for one night.

♪ ♪ I know they'd never match my sweet imagination.

♪ ♪ Everything looks worse in black and white.

♪ ♪ Kodachrome.

♪ They give us those nice bright colors.

They give us the greens of summers.

♪ Makes you think all the world's ♪ ♪ a sunny day, oh yeah.

♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪ Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.

♪ ♪ We'd known each other since we were 9 or 10.

♪ ♪ Together we've climbed hills and trees.

♪ ♪ Learned of love and ABCs.

♪ ♪ Skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.

♪ ♪ Goodbye, my friend, it's hard to die ♪ ♪ when all the birds are singing in the sky.

♪ ♪ Now that the spring is in the air.

♪ announcer: This program has been made possible in part by...