VOICEOVER (VO): It's the nation's favorite antiques experts... Let's get fancy.

VO: ..behind the wheel of a classic car.

I'm always in turbo.

VO: And a goal - to scour Britain for antiques.

Hot stuff!

VO: The aim - to make the biggest profit at auction.

IZZIE: (GASPS) VO: But it's no mean feat.

There'll be worthy winners... PHIL: Cha-ching.

MARK: Oh, my goodness!

VO: ..and valiant losers.

DAVID: Bonkers!

VO: Will it be the high road to glory... You are my ray of sunshine.

NATASHA: Oh, stop it!

VO: ..or the slow road VO: to disaster?

(GEARS CRUNCH) Sorry!

VO: This is Antiques Road Trip.

Yeah!

Strap yourselves in.

It's road-tripping time.

IRITA (IM): I have a feeling this week will be full of giggles.

MARK (MH): I think we're gonna have a lot of fun.

Oh, yes, definitely.

VO: We're hitching a ride with this classy pair of dealers, the debonair Mark Hill and Irita "The Force of Nature" Marriott.

I feel very tall in this car.

Do you?

I feel VERY tall in this car.

Actually, I have to drive like an old lady, like this, because... if I sit upright, there's a... Oh, you can't see!

Of course, you can't see!

(BOTH LAUGH) VO: Ah, the drawbacks of a classic model - in this case, a 1967 Triumph Herald.

I'm excited about this.

So am I.

So am I!

VO: Ooh, me too!

Irita from Derbyshire is an old hand on the Road Trip.

Ooh!

So excited.

VO: She loves a bit of porcelain...

It's a bargain!

VO: ..and always buys with her heart...

I'm sizzling.

(CHUCKLES) VO: ..while Surrey boy Mark is embarking on his second Road Trip contest.

What will I find?

VO: He has a passion for dapper threads...

Here goes nothing!

VO: ..and mid-20th-century design.

Ooh, hello!

Our antiquarian motorists are on an adventure across the southern counties of England.

Starting off in Surrey, they'll travel through East Anglia before heading to a final auction in Sevenoaks.

MH: We're off!

IM: Ooh!

Out into the wilds of Surrey.

(CHUCKLES) Do you dare?

MH: Oh, I definitely dare because this... not only is it a home county, it is MY home county.

MH: I grew up here.

IM: What?

MH: Yes.

IM: Right, right, right.

MH: Yes.

IM: This is not fair!

We should not be starting on your home ground.

Why, do you think it gives me a little bit of an advantage?

I wouldn't say so.

(THEY CHUCKLE) VO: They may be setting off in Surrey, but their rambling road trip will take them hither and thither across the Home Counties.

First, we're in Badshot Lea, on the outskirts of Farnham.

MH: Here we go, yes.

IM: Are you excited?

MH: I am.

How are you?

I'm very excited.

I can see!

You're off already.

Leave something for me.

See you later!

You snooze, you lose.

VO: This is The Antiques Warehouse - a pair of Elizabethan barns packed to the rafters with collectables.

Let's get to business.

Do you recognize this face?

VO: Ooh, you spotted something.

Now, you go in any antiques shop, one thing you will 100% find there is a tea set.

This one is a tad different, hence, in this shop, it might not have been spotted because, if you do not know what the mark on the base means, you won't know what it's worth.

It's something that I have bought plenty of times.

All it has is a monogram and numbers on the bottom.

You need to know that that monogram stands for Wileman Pottery, which is the early Shelley.

Great shape, great color.

I mean... (SIGHS) It's rather nice.

VO: And rather collectable.

Wileman & Co was formed in 1872, manufactured in the Foley China Works in Staffordshire.

The company rebranded as Shelley in the early 20th century in a trademark dispute with other potteries.

And there you have it.

(WHISPERS) Let's have a look.

What does it say?

£165.

Oh, my goodness!

I got expensive taste.

VO: Could be a sleeper, but it's certainly a gamble.

How's Marky Boy getting on?

Now, this I really like.

So what we're looking at is a sort of sauce ladle, or punch ladle, I suppose.

I love the elegance of this long, turned boxwood handle, and then the simplicity of this bowl with this really nicely engraved design around the rim.

But what's kind of interesting for me is it says, "Victorian punch ladle with white metal bowl."

It really feels to me like it's silver-plate rather than silver, but it's got a price tag of £28 on it.

I mean, I just think that's practical and elegant.

Nice.

I think that's a possibility.

VO: Soup-er!

Ha-ha!

Now, Irita has already earmarked that pricey porcelain.

Has she found anything cheaper?

IM: I'm trying to side-track myself right now.

And that is because...

..I want to buy a tea set.

But I don't particularly want to spend that much money on it.

I feel like it's a massive risk for the first shop... ..first trip.

Hmm.

I've always said "trust your gut", though.

That's exactly, I think, what I'm going to do.

VO: You go, girl!

Let's get Hilary in.

IM: Hilary?

HILARY: Hello.

(CHUCKLES) I got a question for you.

HILARY: Right.

Now, can you see that tea set?

You know, that very average-looking tea set.

It's very pretty.

Prettiest one I've got, actually.

Now, you've got £165 on it... What is your...?

There's no haggling involved.

Oh well, that's good.

That's a relief.

IM: Very simple.

HILARY: Yes.

What is your death on it?

I could make it 120.

(WHISPERS) Oh, my God.

Where's my money?

DEALER: Get your money out.

IM: I'm not excited at all.

Two, four, six, eight, 10, 12.

IM: I will put the money there.

Very chilled right now.

HILARY: Good.

IM: Ker-ching!

IM: Thank you!

HILARY: Pleasure.

VO: Wowzers, that's a fantastic price!

£120 paid for the set, including eight trios, milk jug, sugar bowl and two cake plates, leaving Irita with £80.

She'll have it wrapped and sent on to the auction.

VO: Lovely.

IM: Job done.

VO: Meanwhile, Mark is still browsing away.

I rather like this.

It looks like a furled umbrella.

So you've got this leather-covered body here, even showing the sort of furls of the umbrella.

And then we've got the point of the umbrella here and the handle, made of wood.

But, actually, if you pull it open and pull the top of the umbrella off, you've got what looks to me like a needle case.

Now, sewing accessories and knitting accessories, along with this whole sort of rise in fashion for crafting, doing things at home to entertain and teach and make something lovely, we've always done that, and I think we've seen a rise in interest and a rise in values for the antiques related to them.

And I think this probably dates from the Victorian era, or maybe even, perhaps, the Edwardian era, sort of 1880, 1910.

I rather like this.

The price is £75.

I'm going to take this with me and find out what they can do.

VO: To the front desk we go.

MH: Hi, Hilary.

HILARY: Hello, Mark.

I have found two things in this smorgasbord of antique delights I would like to buy.

Oh, good.

Wonderful.

The first is this needle case in the rather natty shape of an umbrella.

Very nice.

MH: So that might be...?

60... Ooh... MH: Ooh... HILARY: Hoping for a bit more?

HILARY: Perhaps 50.

MH: 50?

I'm liking this.

£50.

Right, well, I'll have to take a punt, yes.

And now we have the ladle, as well.

But before we start with the ladle, I have to ask you a question.

So it says, "White metal," and I'm not sure whether it's white metal or silver plate.

What do you think?

Well, we have actually tested it and it is silver.

MH: Excellent.

HILARY: Continental, probably 850, something like that.

MH: Brilliant.

HILARY: Yes.

Can you do anything?

VO: Priced at 28, remember.

I'm awfully sorry, I can't.

MH: (LAUGHS) I don't blame you!

You know, it's a snip, so... Yeah, exactly.

I will pay you, in that case, £78 in total.

HILARY: Wonderful.

MH: Thank you.

Smashing.

28 on the ladle and 50 on the needle case, leaving Mark with £122 to go on with.

MH: Right.

VO: With his purchases safely stowed in the boot, Mark motors on.

Cheerio, old boy, we'll catch up later.

Meanwhile, Irita has traveled to the historic market town of Farnham to learn about a divisive figure from the 19th century - a man who stood up for the working class but also held questionable beliefs that have tarnished his status as a radical reformer - William Cobbett.

Irita's meeting Dr Richard Thomas, chairman of the William Cobbett Society, at the eponymous pub.

IM: Hello, there, Richard.

RICHARD: Hello.

IM: Lovely to meet you.

RICHARD: Nice to meet you.

William Cobbett became famous for a number of things, writing a whole series of bestselling books - An English Grammar, History Of The Protestant Revolution, Cottage Economy.

But the one he's remembered for today is Rural Rides, which he wrote from 1821, for the next six or eight years, traveled around southern England, looking at the state of farming, state of agriculture, state of the rural economy.

And he liked some of what he saw and he hated other stuff, which was basically the increasing poverty of the rural community.

VO: Cobbett was a self-taught man who believed that the government's policies favored the wealthy and exploited the poor.

In 1802, he launched a weekly newspaper called the Political Register, and used it to attack the establishment and major political figures of the day.

Sound familiar?

How many people would you say read his newspaper?

Well, I think the official sales were something like 40,000 to places like pubs, and would have been read to an audience of 20, 30, 40, 100 people.

So he may have sold 40,000, but that means 200,000 people knew what he was saying, and that was a significant part of the population that was interested in what was going on.

So what Cobbett was saying everybody wanted to know - both the elite and the workers - and the fact that when he adopted a cause or attacked somebody, they knew it, cuz everybody else knew it.

And people he would attack suddenly would find 100 people outside their houses booing at them in London, which was great for him, but not for his popularity with the government.

VO: Cobbett believed Parliament needed reform.

At the time, the south of England was overrepresented in government because of rotten boroughs - constituencies controlled by wealthy landowners.

However, after a huge amount of pressure, voting reform was passed, allowing greater representation in Parliament.

So, Richard, William came from the countryside - how did he cope with all the changes with the Industrial Revolution?

Well, he wasn't against change.

In fact, he was in favor of using the new crops, the new equipment, and making farming more efficient.

But as long as it didn't hurt or put out of work the farm... employers - EMPLOYEES.

And he was very keen to make sure that they didn't get poorer, which, of course, in many cases, they did.

VO: Cobbett's main political opponent was William Wilberforce, the great abolitionist.

The two men were both reformers, but held wildly different views.

Cobbett championed the rural English working class, but was also deeply prejudiced, holding what we would consider today to be racist and anti-Semitic points of view.

Lordy!

RICHARD: He has a very mixed reputation, cuz some of the stuff he wrote was apparently bonkers.

He attacked tea, for example.

Why attack tea?

Well, he said it's less nutritious than beer, which is what he was recommending.

And you can't make tea at home - you've to buy it from India - you can make beer at home.

So sensible in a way, but pretty mad in some other ways.

And he was constantly doing that.

Well, this statue is one of, erm, that's been up for a number of years now, and it does summarize his career very well.

It says, "Champion of democracy, "the corruption, the stealing of the wealth by the rich "away from the poor."

And that was something he felt extremely strongly about.

VO: Cobbett died in 1835.

He was a radical yet flawed reformer.

Despite his unacceptable views, we should still recognize his role in extending the rights of the oppressed and the disenfranchised in Britain.

Back on the road, Mark and the Herald are bound for their next shop - in Hartley Wintney, where they'll find White Lion Antiques.

This former coaching inn has 100 cellars spread across three floors of showrooms.

Plenty of choice for Marky Boy and his £122.

Ooh.

Now, I like these.

So just as we've seen mid-century modern West German pottery rising through the ranks and becoming highly sought-after and collectable, we're now seeing exactly the same with mid-century modern Italian pottery.

And here are a couple of examples that really catch my eye.

So, looking at this sort of speckly, mottled, textured glaze here, and these sort of nautical scenes, it makes me think immediately of a company called Fratelli Fanciullacci - a bit of a mouthful.

(ITALIAN-STYLE MUSIC PLAYS) VO: Fratelli Fanciullacci were a pottery based near the River Arno in Florence.

In 1966, the river flooded, destroying the factory, making pieces from before this date very collectable.

MH: I love these mugs.

I have never seen this little elephant head handle on here.

Sort of a strange combination, isn't it, really?

An elephant's head on Italian pottery.

But again, so typical of the factory, and I love the color combination - pink and light blue.

So of the period and so typical of this factory.

So what are we looking at?

We're looking at a pair of mugs for £9.95, and a dish for eight whole pounds.

So you're looking at 18 quid, basically.

My one concern about this is that, although they're becoming increasingly collectable, it's primarily online and sort of through dealers and at fairs, and I'm just not quite sure how they're going to go in a traditional auction.

But, you know what?

I'm really passionate about them, I love them!

And I think I'm going to give it a go.

VO: Time to see Emma on the till.

MH: Hello.

EMMA: Hello.

MH: Amazing center.

EMMA: It is, yes.

MH: It's huge!

EMMA: It is!

I'd like to buy these, please.

EMMA: OK. MH: I think we are at about £18.

I think so, yep.

Wonderful.

Here we go, £18.

Perfect, thank you very much.

I think I've made the right decision.

EMMA: I think you have.

MH: Have a great day.

Thank you very much.

Bye!

VO: Another lot to the good, and still £104 in the kitty.

Righty-o, time to pick up your new mate, Irita.

I feel like I need to put a hairbrush in my handbag for tomorrow.

I think we both need one of those, because mine starts looking like a bit of a toupee that's beginning to come off!

(THEY LAUGH) We'll be like scarecrows!

With the hair stuck up.

Scarecrow and Wiggy.

VO: Indeed.

Ha-ha!

And on that note, nighty-night.

Mornin', all!

We're back on the way, and it's time to compare notes.

Do I need to be worried?

No, not at all.

Don't look at me like that!

I think you're hiding your talent under a bushel.

I think you've got... That's it, that's the smile of confidence.

VO: Or the grimace of someone who's spent most of their money.

I actually splurged yesterday.

I spent £120 on one thing in my first shop.

Confidence - I told you, the smile of confidence.

IM: How was your first day shopping, though?

MH: I enjoyed it.

I bought a few things.

IM: A few things?

MH: A few things, yes.

VO: More than a few, actually.

Yesterday, Mark bought an Italian mid-century square dish with elephant-handled espresso cups, a 19th-century silver punch ladle, and a Victorian umbrella-shaped needle case, as you do...

I rather like this.

VO: ..leaving him £104 - a little over half his original budget - while Irita splurged a chunk of her cash on a Wileman porcelain tea set...

I got expensive taste.

VO: ..leaving just £80 for the rest of her shopping.

So what do you want to find today?

Anything I can afford!

(THEY LAUGH) VO: She'll be looking for bargains, that's for sure.

Their travels today will take in a trio of counties.

First off, it's Eversley in Hampshire, where Irita, having deposited her buddy, will find her next shop - Eversley Barn Antiques, owned and run by Judi.

Ooh, this looks lovely.

VO: This gets better inside.

The barn dates from the 16th century, and it's chock-a-block full of nice items.

I used to use one of these to put a fire on at home.

It's nice.

VO: You might need that to ax some prices because you've only got £80 to spend in here.

I should find something sparkly, cuz I haven't bought anything sparkly as yet.

Which lady does not like a perfume?

Well, I do not know one.

These are rather lovely!

We've got cut-glass scent bottle.

Silver top.

Lovely to have the stopper.

Lovely.

Cut-glass.

Oh!

When you hold it in your hands, you can feel every tiniest bit that has been cut by a wheel.

And then the dispenser.

I mean, that would be a big incentive, if I could afford to buy these, too, and even bigger into it... ..if it would make a profit at auction.

VO: Hmm, you'll have to get the ticket price from dealer Judi later.

Meanwhile, anything else catch your eye?

A lump of cast-iron, maybe?

I don't know.

I mean, what even is that - a planter?

It's rather nice.

So it's not giving any clues away to where it started its life from.

So I think I need to ask Judi whether she knows where it came from.

Judi?

Hi, what have you found, Irita?

Well, I'm looking at this.

JUDI: Oh, that's beautiful, isn't it?

And I'm thinking... it's rather nice for, you know, wine cooler, or a planter...

Perfect!

But do you know what it was originally?

No!

It's Victorian, and it's a coal scuttle from a first-class railway carriage.

IM: What?

JUDI: Yeah, I know.

JUDI: Posh, isn't it?

IM: So, what, they would have had coal in that?

Yeah!

And they'd have had a little fire in the first class, and that's what they would have used it for.

IM: Now, while you're here... JUDI: Yeah.

IM: ..it has no price tag.

JUDI: Okey-dokey.

IM: I...

I've seen that.

JUDI: Mm-hm?

Then you had some scent bottles.

OK, yeah.

Cool.

IM: The silver-topped ones.

JUDI: Yeah.

Yeah.

Four of them.

You could have those for, er, 70.

IM: Can I?

JUDI: Yeah, that and the perfume bottles, you could.

IM: Are you sure?

JUDI: Yeah, yeah.

VO: Sounds like a good deal to me.

That leaves Irita with just £10 in her kitty.

IM: Thank you for having me.

JUDI: Good luck at auction.

IM: I know.

Keep your fingers crossed!

JUDI: Yeah!

IM: See you later!

JUDI: See you later.

VO: She'll have the coal bucket sent on to the saleroom, and get back in the motor.

Come on, Herald, we're off for a day out together.

VO: Now, Mark has made his way to Ascot.

World-famous for its racecourse.

He's meeting Andy Palethorpe, one of the track's iconic bowler hat stewards... ..to learn about the origins and history of this British institution.

MH: So where are we right now?

So, obviously, the racecourse must be over there.

ANDY: We're in the parade ring.

MH: Right.

The horses, the trainers, the owners and the jockeys will come out and meet their groups.

And that's where it all starts before the race.

So I see it says, "Fourth, third, second."

I'm guessing that's something to do with winning.

That's exactly it.

Quite a prestigious place to be.

Second, third and fourth, as you say.

The winners' is behind me.

This is where it all happens.

VO: Horse racing is the second-biggest spectator sport in the country, known as the sport of kings.

James I was scolded by Parliament for spending too much time at Newmarket Races, and thanks to Charles II, every thoroughbred you find on the turf today can be traced back to the sires from the Stuarts' era.

At Ascot, it was Queen Anne who played a key part in its history.

So how did it come about?

Why Ascot?

1711, Queen Anne, a Stuart monarch - that long ago - used to ride her horses out on the heath and she thought, "This is a good idea for horse gallops, for maybe races."

It started off with four-horse races, with landowners putting their horses against other landowners and lords and ladies and whatever.

And that's how it all started.

VO: The first race at Ascot was called Her Majesty's Plate, for a prize of 100 guineas, and took place on the 11th of August, 1711.

It continues to be contested as the Queen Anne Stakes.

The next important royal in Ascot's history was George IV.

His patronage of Ascot made it one of the most fashionable social occasions of the year, with the famous dandy Beau Brummell establishing a strict dress code that is still observed today.

Now, if I came to Royal Ascot, I couldn't really wear this, could I?

Because I think there's a dress code.

So talk to me about this.

There certainly is a dress code.

Men - top hats, tails... ..and smart appearance.

So this is full morning dress, effectively?

Full morning dress.

Gray or black.

Gray or black top hat?

Yep.

And ladies - hats, of course, or fascinator, and dress.

We've got the fashion police here anyway, so you wouldn't get away with it.

So they're going around.

So they check everybody before they come in to make sure...?

Oh, yeah, they'll be about.

MH: OK. ANDY: But we can we can adapt.

We've got things, if they've forgotten something, you know, we can sort you out.

So you have a full wardrobe hidden somewhere with top hats and things in it?

I wouldn't say a full wardrobe, but maybe the odd fascinator here and there.

VO: 350,000 people attend Royal Ascot over five days every June, and to accommodate the crowds, the current grandstand was built in 2006.

Spectators from across the country flock to Ascot, where they can dress to the nines, just as Beau Brummell intended, and take in the thrill of the races.

Wow!

What a view - that's amazing!

ANDY: Yes.

MH: So having been here and seen all of this, and listened to you today, I kind of get the sense that this isn't the end for Ascot, it's going to continue.

That's right.

Not at all.

In 1813, there was an Act of Parliament which secured racing on Ascot Heath, and here we are, all those centuries later, still going racing.

Long may it continue.

VO: Is that the sound of a galloping horse rounding the final bend?

Ha-ha!

Of course not, it's Irita in the Herald.

(GEARS GRIND) IM: Oh.

We'll try turning to gear three.

(GEARS CRUNCH) Woo!

Oh.

Get in!

Honestly, me and gear three in this car!

I prefer gear four.

Sorry, gear three.

(CHUCKLES) Because, remember, I'm always in turbo.

I'm not the gear-one kind of person.

VO: She's right.

She's putting the pedal to the metal en route to Bagshot in Surrey and her final stop-off, Cubbit Antiques.

My last chance to splash the cash.

VO: Ha-ha-ha.

A jest, of course.

Irita only has £10 left to shop with.

Ha!

IM: Hello?

Blimey, what a shop!

I mean, if you need a fireplace, you're in heaven, basically.

VO: Yes, it's a rather lovely selection of antiques, design pieces and salvaged architecture.

Not exactly cheap, though.

Every single one of these crystals are hand-cut.

They are absolutely incredible.

This is £14,000.

That's £14,000 in pure crystal.

VO: Yes, it's rather out of your budget.

Anyway, best carry on looking.

Meanwhile, over the border in Berkshire, Mark has arrived in Warfield.

He's shopping at The Old Grain Barn antiques.

He has £104 to spend here, and with two floors' worth of showroom, plenty of choice.

Ha-ha.

Ha-ha-ha-ha.

I love these, and, no, it's not a sort of dinner dome for a mouse or a rabbit or something.

You lift this up, and inside you would have found a muffin, or another piece of toast.

This is a muffin warmer.

So if I pop the lid down, the dome down, and pull the tray out here, you'd put hot water in here, put the tray back on, put your muffins in here, or your little toast or breads, or whatever they may be.

Put the dome on the top, and it would keep your muffins or your toast toasty-warm.

Because, after all, who really likes eating cold toast if you're going for dinner or lunch or breakfast, or something like that?

It's a wonderful piece of sort of Victorian invention.

And these were introduced in the late Victorian period for keeping toast and muffins warm.

It's got a lovely little ebony handle on the top.

And if I turn it over, it is indeed silver-plate, which is fairly standard.

But it says "Selfridge's".

"Selfridge's" and "ENPS".

ENPS is not "English pure natural silver" - it is "electroplated nickel silver".

But for six quid, I think that's really quite a cute thing.

I'm going to pop it back there for the moment and keep on looking.

Focus on the game.

VO: Jolly good.

Now, is Irita having any luck back in Bagshot?

Hello?

(LAUGHS) Oh, my goodness!

IM: Erm, hello?

DEALER: Hello.

Wow!

Are you Matthew?

I am indeed.

How are you?

I'm good, thank you.

What a place!

Thank you very much.

It is incredible!

We like to think so.

VO: She's buttering you up first.

Now brace yourself, Matt.

I don't think I can afford to beat around the bush.

DEALER: OK. IM: Don't give me that look!

DEALER: OK, well... IM: I'm very scared IM: to come clean.

DEALER: (CHUCKLES) And that's not like me.

No problem.

I've been busy shopping, and, erm, I have very little money in my pocket.

Yes.

I feel I know what's coming.

Erm... have you got, like, a trash bin that I could buy?

So I've got something in mind for you.

IM: Go on.

DEALER: This way.

Sounds ominous.

I thought you were joking.

I was only having a laugh IM: about the bin!

DEALER: Well... Are you being serious?

You did mention a rubbish bin.

IM: (LAUGHS) So, for £5, there you go.

Is that what I can afford here?

Yeah.

And you get to keep everything inside.

Wow!

Could even be a money spider in there, so you might make something at auction.

I might get lucky.

Erm...

Right.

Well, yeah, beggars can't be choosers.

Not in here, I'm afraid.

(THEY LAUGH) I so wish I would have had more money in my pocket!

Oh, Matthew!

I might ask you to leave the rubbish with you, though.

I'll go empty this for you now and I'll load it into the car.

Thank you very much.

IM: Thank you, Matthew!

DEALER: Thank you.

No problem.

VO: That's Irita all shopped up, and with £5 left unspent.

But Mark is still rummaging in Warfield, bless him.

MH: So what do you reckon this is made of, then?

If I could show you this, you'd probably think it was made of metal, copper, bronze - something like that, I guess.

So I'm guessing it's going to surprise you if I tell you it's actually made of glass.

It's not all glass - it's a glass body with this very delicate pattern on that was then electroplated with copper.

So they use an electroplating process to bond the copper to the body of the glass inside.

And when I look over the top, I can actually see the blue glass body just inside there.

So the shape, this pattern and the style tell me that it was made at the Belgian glass factory Val Saint Lambert.

I think this was made about 1900, 1905.

How much?

Quanto costa?

£80.

That's nearly all the money I've got.

I'm going to pop it back there for a moment, but believe me, that's a definite maybe.

VO: Seems a happy hunting ground so far for Mark.

Time for one more?

MH: Ha-ha!

Now, we all know that smoking is deadly, it's lethal!

But some pieces associated with smoking, certainly from the late 19th and even the early 20th century, can be highly collectable today.

What I've got here is something that some people call a nut bird.

It's not made of a nut, it's actually made of carved wood, but, obviously, you can see the bird here, and it's sort of a smoker's companion, a smoker's accessory.

So the ashtray would sit inside here.

You'd keep the matches in this little well here, and you take a match out, strike it on a rough piece of chagrin or a rough material on there, light your cigarette, and you had a little bird watching you.

Price tag says £30.

I think we're going to have to do a little bit better than that on this.

But I really like these, and I think they've got a good, strong appeal from collectors of smoking memorabilia.

I'm going to hold on to this.

I think he's a rather cute little thing.

And who could resist a little expression like that?

He's fab.

On we go.

VO: Time to track down Stuart, the dealer.

Stuart, hello.

DEALER: Hi, Mark!

MH: So I've got my bird MH: in hand for £30... DEALER: Right.

..a Val Saint Lambert vase for £80, and a silver-plated muffin warmer.

Oh, very nice!

VO: Ticket price £6.

MH: What's the best you can do?

DEALER: Right.

Working to a really tight budget - I haven't got much money left - so your best price, please.

How about 95 for the three?

Do you know what?

I can't say no to that.

That's a really kind deal.

MH: Thank you very much, Stuart.

DEALER: OK. MH: That's brilliant.

DEALER: Our pleasure.

Thank you very much indeed.

VO: £4 on the muffin warmer, 70 on the vase, 21 on the nut bird, leaving Mark with £9 in his pocket.

MH: Thank you, Stuart.

DEALER: Thank you.

MH: Thank you.

DEALER: Bye.

VO: And that's Mark finished up, too.

Now, best hitch a ride with Irita.

We should get a magic carpet.

MH: I would love a magic carpet.

IM: Oh!

Can you buy them in antique shops?

I will whip one out for you.

IM: We would be off.

Where would you go?

MH: And off we fly.

Where would I go?

I'd definitely go to the Far East.

I just want it to go to auction.

MH: Oh, come on.

(THEY LAUGH) VO: Me, too, Irita.

Me, too.

Time for some shuteye.

It's auction day.

Mark and Irita are in Berkshire this morning.

That's rather good parking.

IM: May I say so?

MH: Thank you very much, m'lady.

MH: After you.

IM: Oh, thank you!

CS: After a jaunt through the Home Counties, they've made their way to Windsor, parking up at The Old Court cinema to watch the latest blockbuster - their auction.

Ha-ha!

IM: Oh, this looks very grand.

MH: It does.

Wow!

Seat number six for the lady right here.

Number seven - I really needed eight.

An auspicious number, of course.

VO: Meanwhile, their purchases have been sent north to Broughton Astley in Leicestershire and Sutton Hill Farm Country Auctions, with keen bidders online, in the room and on commission, all under the stewardship of auctioneer Debbie Sterland.

Irita maxed out her budget, spending £195 on four items.

What do you think of the tea set, Debs?

Stunning set.

I absolutely love this.

VO: Mark spent £191, combining the muffin holder and ladle to make five lots.

What do you think of the needle case, Debbie?

I must say, I've not had one of these in the auction before.

However, they can be desirable for certain collectors.

VO: Thanks, Debbie.

Now, time to get the viewing tablets out and the popcorn ready!

I always get nervous.

I'm glad it's not just me!

VO: It's not.

My palms are sweating already!

Mark's Italian pottery is first.

I don't quite know how to react to this.

The eyes are giving it all away, though.

IM: Oh, is it?

Oh.

MH: Yeah.

DEBBIE: £20?

MH: Surely, 20?

DEBBIE: Beautiful pieces.

IM: Come on.

Nobody for £20?

20 we have, thank you.

25 anywhere?

MH: I'm in profit.

DEBBIE: Bid at 20.

25 now.

30?

Come on, it's a tenner a piece!

30, we now have online.

DEBBIE: 35 now, 40 anywhere?

MH: Yes!

40, just in time, thank you.

This isn't working.

It's an online bid at 40.

Come on!

It's a final call, then, at £40... VO: Hey, a tidy double-up on his money there.

Very, very happy bunny.

I think I might be looking for some elephant-handled cups next.

Well, good luck, they're really rare.

Well, I know that now, don't I?

(CHUCKLES) VO: Ha-ha!

Irita's turn now - will it be rubbish or reward with her vintage wastepaper bin?

Now, I have zero expectations of this.

Right.

I have two commission bids.

I can start the bidding at £10 with me... IM: (CHUCKLES) MH: Hey!

Straight in.

With me on commission, 12 anywhere?

12, 14, 16.

I can't believe you had two commission bids for a brand-new bin!

It's a website bid at 16.

18 anywhere?

Are we all done now?

18, 20 now.

IM: Oh, my goodness!

MH: My goodness!

It's a final call now, then, at £20... VO: Hey, one man's trash is another man's treasure.

IM: That is absolutely bonkers!

MH: Well done!

MH: (CHUCKLES) IM: Like, literally bonkers.

VO: Let's see what the bidders make of Mark's next lot - the white-metal ladle and silver-plated muffin warmer.

So you combined two things into one lot?

I did, I did.

Both items are sold as silver-plated.

BOTH: Ah!

DEBBIE: £20, surely?

DEBBIE: Nobody for 20?

IM: They must've tested it.

MH: Oh!

DEBBIE: Let's try 10.

MH: Oh!

IM: Oh Mark!

One of them is marked "Selfridge's" - 10 in the room, thank you, sir.

12 anywhere?

12 I have online.

14, sir?

14.

16 now.

18?

No?

Thank you, anyway.

It's an online bid, then, at £16.

Are we all done?

VO: Oh, well.

You win some, you lose some.

Had it been white metal... IM: It would've been 60, not 16.

MH: ..then it would have flown and then I'd have been really happy.

MH: Hopefully, Irita will have better luck with her set of four silver-top glass perfume bottles.

Do you approve of these?

Meh.

DEBBIE: £40?

IM: Come on, tenner each.

DEBBIE: 40 we have, thank you.

MH: Yay!

45 anywhere?

It's a website bid at 40.

45 anywhere?

45, 50 now, 55?

I like her!

55, 60 now.

65?

Final call at 60.

65, 70.

IM: Ooh!

MH: Oh!

Last-minute bids.

It's a final call, then, at £70 only... VO: It's another double-up.

Cor, she's doing well today.

That's amazing.

That's double my money.

Well done, you.

It's not all sewn up yet, though.

Mark's umbrella-shaped needle case is next.

Let's try 10.

MH: Oh, no!

IM: No!

10, we have in the room, thank you.

12 anywhere?

MH: "Thank you"?

DEBBIE: It's a room bid we have at 10.

12 now.

14, sir?

14, 16.

We have an auction.

18, thank you.

And 20?

At £18... IM: No!

DEBBIE: Final call at 18.

20, just in time via the website.

25?

Final call at £20... VO: Ouch!

The bidders have stitched Mark up there.

MH: Oh, dear.

IM: I am... MH: Oh, well.

IM: ..shocked.

(CHUCKLES) VO: Now, Irita gambled over half her budget on this Wileman Foley tea set.

Do you approve, or shall I not bother asking?

I love it.

VO: Hopefully the bidders do, too.

Where should we start the bidding?

300?

DEBBIE: 300, we have.

IM: (GASPS) (BOTH EXCLAIM) MH: Well done!

320, 340, 380, 400.

It's amazing!

420?

420 now.

440?

440, 460.

460, 480.

So nervous now?

500?

500.

550?

MH: (GASPS) IM: 550?!

550.

Are we all done, then?

At £550... VO: Goodness me, a terrific profit!

Fantastic!

(CHORTLES) That's more like it.

That is slightly more than what I expected it to make.

Just a little bit.

VO: Mark has a mountain to climb.

He'll need his art nouveau Leon Ledru vase to perform well.

£20?

BOTH: No!

20 we have, thank you.

DEBBIE: 25 anywhere?

MH: Thank you.

It's an online bid at 20.

25, 30, now, we have.

35 anywhere?

IM: A long way to go.

Yeah, thanks for reminding me.

35, thank you.

35... IM: No!

MH: (SIGHS) Oh, Mark!

Lady Luck is not with me today.

VO: No, indeed she is not.

Have you broken any mirrors lately or been walking under ladders?

You win some, you lose some.

You're mainly winning some, I'm mainly losing some!

VO: Irita's final lot now - a cast-iron coal bucket.

40 in the room.

MH: Oh!

IM: Yes!

You've made a profit for everything!

It's a room bid at 40.

45 anywhere?

DEBBIE: Are we all done now?

IM: Oh, short and sweet.

45, just in time online.

MH: Oh!

IM: No, that's 45.

No?

50, thank you, in the room.

It's the room bid that takes it at £50.

MH: Well done.

IM: I'm happy with that.

DEBBIE: Final call at 50... VO: Well, it's a clean sweep for Irita, making a profit on every item.

MH: Well done, you.

IM: More than happy with that.

VO: One last chance for Mark to redeem himself with his art deco smoker's companion.

I'm steeling myself for a bit of a loss.

You can't lose that much when you've spent £21.

Well, I can try.

(THEY LAUGH) DEBBIE: £20?

MH: Come on.

Yes, yes, yes!

10 we have, thank you, online.

DEBBIE: We now have 12, 14.

IM: I said online.

16, 18.

DEBBIE: Bid at 18.

20 anywhere?

MH: Come on... (STUTTERS) DEBBIE: Are we all done, then?

DEBBIE: The online bid at £18.

MH: No we're not all done.

£18... VO: Oh, no!

Keep your pecker up, eh?

Nearly, so close.

VO: But just before the final credits roll, let's tally up.

Mark started this leg with £200.

Despite buying some nice pieces, after saleroom fees, he made a loss, finishing with £114.78.

Irita has raced into an early lead.

She also began with £200 and, after auction costs, she now has a whopping £570.80.

What a woman!

This is really good popcorn!

Yes, it is, Moneybags.

And we're off!

I'm glad you got your own bag.

With the tiny amount of money that I had left over.

IM: Aw!

MH: Oh, dear.

Don't cry!

I'll try not to.

(THEY LAUGH) subtitling@stv.tv