VOICEOVER (VO): It's the nation's favorite antiques experts... Alright, fair enough.

It's a really cute subject.

VO: ..behind the wheel of a classic car.

NATASHA: Make it so.

MARGIE: Here we go!

VO: And a goal to scour Britain for antiques.

Frankly terrifying.

VO: The aim, to make the biggest profit at auction.

VO: But it's no mean feat.

CHARLES: I've lost money!

VO: There'll be worthy winners... PHILIP: Get in there!

VO: ..and valiant losers.

Could have been worse.

VO: Will it be the high road to glory?

PHILIP: Ooh.

VO: Or the slow road to disaster?

TIM: Ugh!

VO: This is the Antiques Road Trip!

VO: Oh yeah!

VO: Welcome to a wet and windy final installment of our outing with James Braxton, and fellow antiques aficionado Charles Hanson.

How's your honk this morning?

(HONKS HORN) Excellent.

VO: Our treasure-seeking tootlers seem largely undeterred by the ongoing tempest.

Ha!

CHARLES: This weather's what we need, James.

As water falls on our rich finds, they will fruit.

Generally, antiques don't do well in the rain.

So you need to keep them inside.

VO: Do you know, he's got a point, especially with the less-than- watertight classic vehicles they're currently piloting.

CHARLES: I've got a small leak in my car.

I'm just trying to lean left to get the leak off my shoulder.

VO: Ha-ha.

Charles is behind the wheel of a slightly moist MGA, from a time when seat belts weren't mandatory.

While James' Austin-Healey is a few years younger, but equally sieve-like.

JAMES: I've got a wet leg.

Through storm and bad weather, James, we sail on.

VO: Yes, they're just about afloat.

James, from Sussex has bags of Road Trip know-how.

He talks a good antique.

The better the buy, the greater the profit.

VO: While also-adept Derbyshire man Charles puts his best knee forward.

CHARLES: Come on, Mr Braxton, catch us if you can.

No, I know he can't.

No, no, I know, we're well ahead.

VO: And chatting with the chattels seems to be paying off... 100... JAMES: (LAUGHS) VO: ..so far.

I can't see you at all.

Are you OK?

Yeah.

I'm behind you, trailing rather like an underfunded football team, at the moment.

VO: Ha-ha!

Yes, James does rather badly need a cash injection after having reduced his starting £200 down to £160.40.

VO: While Charles, who began with the same sum, can boast of £542.54.

With just one auction to go, that's quite a gap.

I've got to hit a couple of sixes, chief.

JAMES: (LAUGHS) VO: Yes, please Beefy Braxton.

They began in Brackley, and subsequently sidled off towards East Anglia.

Next came the county of Kent.

Right now, they're about to explore several southern shires before heading up toward their final destination in Derbyshire.

Do you feel you're ripening, James?

I feel I am ripening.

I may be slightly overripe.

That is the problem.

VO: All roads lead to an auction in Bourne End, Buckinghamshire.

Starting out in Berkshire, at Hungerford where they take their antiques very seriously.

Parking, as well.

Never easy... Chin up.

CHARLES: Antiques.

VO: Yep, definitely in the right place.

CHARLES: Crumbs!

VO: Why the long face?

CHARLES: Good morning.

MAN: Hi.

CHARLES: How are you?

MAN: Good, thank you.

CHARLES: And your name is?

Stewart.

CHARLES: May I go for a wander?

STEWART: Please do.

I'll start through here.

Thank you.

VO: Yes, I wonder what, with well over £500 at his disposal, he'll end up plumping for.

Lots of choice... Look at that.

I'm quite taken by this clock and, in fact, it appears to be a mantel clock.

But it isn't.

But what is it?

Well, you'll see it's completely hollow running through.

Hello.

You can almost see all the way through there.

On the back, you've got this open space where, I think, if you went to bed, said "Goodnight", you'd have put your pocket watch into that gap there.

And then you would have said, "I might write a letter."

So you'll take that off.

You might then put an inkwell in there, one in there, but, then, of course, to write, you needed light.

A candlestick, years ago, would have sat there.

What I love is this gilded metal facade which, to me, reflects the fashion of the 1830s.

Augustus Welby Northmore Pugin was the most important architect of that time.

VO: The creator of both Parliament and Big Ben's tower.

CHARLES: It's got the original paper label to confirm who made it, which years ago sat on the base like that.

Amazing object.

Never seen one before.

And there's also no price label at all.

It could be for nothing.

VO: Good times, eh?

Ha!

Meanwhile, just over the border in Hampshire, James is about to arrive at his first shop of the day... in the market town of Alton.

At The Vintage Cupboard.

Not got nearly so much cash as his chum, remember.

Just £160, in fact.

Old barrel.

VO: Which will make his first find even more crucial.

JAMES: I just picked up these.

Dr Christopher Dresser was regarded as really the first industrial designer.

A Scot, and worked with lots of manufacturers.

And one of these manufacturers was called Benham & Froud, in London in Chandos Street, and they had a particular mark.

This mark here is stamped underneath.

And when you get an item that looks like Christopher Dresser, and is also made by one of his preferred manufacturers he designed for, things start sort of clicking a bit, don't they?

VO: Especially when the asking price is a mere £18.

JAMES: These firedogs, lovely materials.

So we've got brass, we've got copper, and then we've got the screws here.

So instead of having something rebated in, or hidden.

No, they're very proud, round-headed screws.

So the integrity of design and integrity of construction, and it has the Benham & Froud mark.

So I think they are a design by Christopher Dresser.

I think they're made by an important late 19th century manufacturer.

And the price is £18.

One, I can afford to buy them, and, two, wild horses wouldn't stop me.

VO: Giddy up, then.

And speaking of wild horses - well, wet ones anyway - how are things in Hungerford?

Where Charles already has this pocket watch stand in mind.

And he's clocked something else.

CHARLES: That's nice.

I love objects which define a country house.

You've got this bucket with the cane original handle.

You've also got the inner liner to the bucket.

And this, essentially, is a slop pail for collecting the dirty water of the day.

VO: Yeah, contents of the wash basins.

And you'll see it's transfer-printed with a pretty Italianate scene in this cartouche.

It's been hand-tinted, too, with the nice polychrome colors on that landscape interior.

You'll see the bucket itself has what probably is the original cane handle.

Beautiful cartouche, again, all hand-tinted.

They are charming objects.

They have got some condition issues.

Look, you've got a chip here on the bucket.

You've also got some rivets.

I quite rate these two.

The bucket is priced at £34 and the jug is 23.

I'm sure a deal can be done.

VO: Yeah.

Gird your loins, son.

CHARLES: Stewart.

Come in.

STEWART: On my way.

CHARLES: I found two things.

STEWART: Well done.

Feels like a deal coming on.

CHARLES: (LAUGHS) VO: Marvelous.

CHARLES: So, I wondered what could be the death on the jug and bowl?

STEWART: They're 34 and 23... 45 for the pair, ..because it's nice to see them go out together.

The other thing I like is the clock down here, or what you might call a pocket watch stand.

How much is that?

It's £80.

So 70... 65.

I'll do that for 65.

CHARLES: OK, 65 plus 45 is 110.

Would you take a oner?

CHARLES: £100?

STEWART: I suspect I would do.

CHARLES: I will take the two.

Going, going, going... Gone.

VO: Thanks, Stewart.

That'll be £45 for the bucket and jug, 55 for the watch stand.

Shame Charles seems to have forgotten them.

Perhaps he just doesn't want to get them wet, hey?

£442 left.

But that's enough shopping for now, because, in the equally beautiful, if equally soggy, Hampshire countryside James is coming beak to beak with some remarkable wildlife.

JAMES: They are big, aren't they?

VO: Yeah.

We're at the Hawk Conservancy Trust... VO: ..just outside the village of Weyhill.

With head of research and conservation, Dr Campbell Murn.

JAMES: Hello.

CAMPBELL: Hi, James.

How are you?

JAMES: Very good.

Good to meet you.

Nice to see you.

JAMES: It's lovely to be out of the rain.

I've just seen a lovely little owl down there.

CAMPBELL: Ah, well it's probably a burrowing owl, actually.

Looks like a little owl, it's just got longer legs.

VO: You wouldn't know it now, but all of this was once originally a smallholding in the care of Reg and Hilary Smith.

Soft-hearted farmers who were forever taking in waifs and strays from the animal kingdom.

Until, in the early 1960s, a brush with a popular children's TV program brought about a change.

CAMPBELL: And, at that time, one of the unusual residents was an albino badger.

Yeah.

So Reg was invited to come on to Blue Peter with the albino badger to talk about it.

So when you're on a film set, apparently, there's somebody who's assigned to look after you.

And this bloke decided to put his hand into the crate with the badger, and the badger promptly went... ..and chunked him.

So the producer said, "Well, here's Reg.

We haven't got the badger.

Anybody who wants to see the badger, pop along to Reg and Hilary's farm at Sunny Mead this weekend, and I'm sure they'll be happy to show you the badger.

Ah... CAMPBELL: And that weekend I think 300 cars turned up.

JAMES: (LAUGHS) CAMPBELL: And then, on the Sunday, something like 500 people turned up.

Wow... And the story goes that it was the local police officer who said to Reg, "Look, "I'm going to have to charge you with obstruction here, "if you don't get rid of these people."

He said, "You're not making much of a go as a farmer, "Reg, why don't you open a zoo?"

VO: The Weyhill Wildlife Park, featuring European mammals like wolves and bears was, for many years, a great success.

But youngest son Ashley's passion was for birds of prey.

And so, from the mid-1970s onwards, the raptors and the urgency of their conservation began to take over.

CAMPBELL: A large part of our work today is capturing the attention and imagination of young people.

Showing them the beauty of birds of prey, and they carry that through with them for the rest of their lives.

CAMPBELL: So we have two types of birds here at the park.

We have birds that are part of our education programs, and then we have birds to be part of a conservation breeding program.

JAMES: So what are you concentrating on breeding at the moment?

Most of our effort goes into the critically endangered vultures.

And we've had some remarkable success with that.

JAMES: And why are vultures in such decline?

Well, principally poisoning, really.

Toxic chemicals.

So, in Africa, vultures are in serious trouble because of poisoning.

VO: For poachers, the vulture is a threat, because it alerts game wardens to their crimes.

But the endangered birds play a vital role in the African ecosystem, eating dead animals before they rot, and thus helping to avoid the spread of disease.

CAMPBELL: Everybody who's here at the trust loves vultures, and rarely, if ever, had a case where people have left a visit to the Hawk Conservancy not liking vultures.

JAMES: Campbell, I notice you have a hospital here.

JAMES: What's that for?

CAMPBELL: Yes, we do.

CAMPBELL: That was one of Hilary's big passions, was caring for injured wildlife, and that's been a feature of the Hawk Conservancy from the very early days.

A lot of our admissions are because of accidents with cars.

So, often, a car comes around the corner, owl doesn't have time to fly out of the way and it's hit.

If you can get close enough to touch a bird of prey, it really is very poorly.

JAMES: Yeah.

And so what we recommend to people is to perhaps throw a towel over it, and then be able to scoop it up and put it in your car.

First port of call is your nearest vet.

Yeah.

Or the RSPCA or, if you're close enough to us, you can bring it here.

VO: Although Hilary and Reg passed away many years ago, their son Ashley remains president to this day.

VO: Meanwhile, out on those blustery country roads, James' hawk-eyed but house- trained rival is looking perky.

CHARLES: It's been an amazing week.

We've had highs.

Highs and highs and highs for me, and really lows and lows and lows for James, but loads of fun.

It's been the best week with James ever, I think.

There's always that flip side.

Well I'm the hat-trick hero, I think, but, I kid you not, James can and just might pull it out the bag.

You wait and see.

VO: It ain't over till it's over, especially with more shopping to do... ..over the border in the Wiltshire city of Salisbury.

At the eponymous Antiques Centre.

Wipes his feet, I see.

Lovely.

Well, it's that sort of place, after all.

The mighty £400 he still has left to spend may not go that far in here.

Wow.

CHARLES: Hello.

Hello, Charles.

CHARLES: Your name is?

MAN: I'm Chris.

Chris.

What an amazing antiques emporium.

CHARLES: One thing I've seen away from all the Georgian, the great Victoriana, is a piece of folk art with a roar.

CHARLES: I like that.

CHRIS: He's fantastic, isn't he?

He's allegedly an advert for Tiger Balm.

CHARLES: Really?

CHRIS: Yeah.

CHARLES: Maybe 1920s?

I can see he's got some great wear, but the market now, it likes this sort of unique look of an object, and I think he's great.

CHRIS: He is great.

VO: Or grrreat!

One for the younger viewers.

Ha.

Looks like papier-mâché, and I suspect he might be, what, £500?

CHRIS: A little more.

CHARLES: Yes, a lot more?

CHRIS: Yeah.

CHARLES: How much is he?

He's 1,200.

CHARLES: Look at me.

How much?

CHRIS: He's 1,200.

CHARLES: Really?

CHRIS: Yeah, really.

CHARLES: Wow... Have you anything elsewhere, away from the great quality, which is more, I suppose, humble or tired.

Like me today.

That needs a bit of TLC?

There is a back room.

CHARLES: You're joking?

That is...was a workshop.

CHARLES: And what's in there?

Everything.

And where's that room?

CHRIS: Copper and brass...

It's upstairs.

CHARLES: OK. VO: Back room?

Workshop?

The merest mention is catnip to our antiques experts.

Look at him run!

Ho-ho!

CHARLES: Wow, Chris.

I love this room, because it just feels dusty and just...

I love that sort of royal-looking Sèvres vase over there, in blue Celeste.

I love the marble clock over there, as well.

CHRIS: Mm-hm.

CHARLES: It's got no hands but, even so, good quality.

And I can see one, two, three, four... about eight warming pans over there... CHRIS: Yes!

CHARLES: Huddled together to keep warm.

One thing, cuz I've just seen over here, is this.

What do you think of this?

Well, I think it's an African mortar.

Why African?

Ashanti, or something like that.

VO: Lost its pestle, though.

CHRIS: I would think it's probably late 19th-century.

What's it made of?

CHRIS: Well, I thought it might be teak.

CHARLES: It's some sort of hardwood, but it hasn't half had some wear and tear over the years.

CHRIS: It's certainly seen life, hasn't it?

VO: I think Charles reckons it's a wee bit older.

CHARLES: Now, I can't see a price, Chris, on it at all.

How much is it?

Well, I was looking for about 200 for it.

Yeah... CHARLES: What's the absolute best on this?

The very best I would do... CHARLES: Look at me.

..to you.

150.

CHARLES: I think... it's worth a gamble.

Chris, what we say in my line of work is going, going, going... Gone.

VO: Good to see him spending some of his squillions.

Time to get back to the motor.

And back to his boon companion.

I do hope the weather's better tomorrow, because they'll be heading south towards the coast.

CHARLES: Are we almost there yet, Dad?

Dad, are we almost there yet?

VO: Do be quiet in the back.

He he!

Night night.

VO: Ah, that's more like it!

I wonder where the other one's got to.

JAMES: What a lovely day.

It's lovely to get the roof off.

Yesterday, we had one and a half inches of rain in Hampshire.

Today, at least six inches of sunshine.

Glorious.

VO: Also, a good day for the scooting.

Hello, there.

Nice car.

VO: Oops.

Do you fancy a swap?

Hello?

VO: Charles!

Will you behave?

It's OK, it's OK.

I don't need a lift.

I'm OK. Bye bye!

I think she thought I needed a lift.

I think she felt a bit sorry for me.

I'm OK.

I'm fitter than James, I think.

VO: Well, Charles certainly has bought more, because, yesterday, James only acquired a bargain pair of Christopher Dresser-style firedogs.

JAMES: Wild horses wouldn't stop me.

VO: Leaving him with just over £140 to spend today.

While Charles splashed quite a lot more for a slop bucket and jug, an African mortar, and a pocket watch stand.

As you do.

It could be for nothing.

VO: It wasn't.

But he does still have almost 300 left in his pocket.

Oh, that was...I went through some manure, then.

Can you smell it?

I hit a cowpat.

Agh!

Oh, no, there's poo!

There's poo on the road!

I've got my white trousers on!

VO: Relax!

I think it might mean good luck.

It does in France.

VO: The very last shopping day of our road trip will start out in Fareham.

Connected to mighty Portsmouth harbor via Fareham Creek, where our esteemed experts will be sharing a premises.

JAMES: Ah!

CHARLES: How are you?

JAMES: I thought I was going to get in there.

VO: Steady, Charles... Like a vision.

Good morning.

Good morning to you.

What an amazing day compared to yesterday.

JAMES: I know.

Everything's in the right place today, isn't it?

Yeah.

I've got two more things to buy.

CHARLES: Open the door for me.

JAMES: OK, ready... JAMES: ..steady... go!

CHARLES: Go on then.

Is it open?

JAMES: Open.

OK, wait for me, James.

VO: Not inside.

Ouch!

I don't think there's a no-scooter rule at Robin's Nest.

Not recommended, though, despite the very smooth floors.

There we are.

Presumably, Charles... Charles!

VO: I think we've just witnessed scooter-assisted speed browsing.

Time to investigate a few of the items duly noted.

CHARLES: Love the color of this.

It sort of captures the art deco.

And what we call tube-lined.

So I close my eyes, I can feel the raised lines of the outline of the design, and it's actually made by the Crown Ducal works, which were a Staffordshire factory, and the lady who designed this pot, I'm sure the label will say to me...

Yes, a Charlotte Rhead-designed Crown Ducal vase in the Persian rose pattern.

Only produced in the year 1935.

VO: It's coincidentally priced at £35, as well.

I love this vase.

It's just so colorful, so cheery.

Like the weather here on the south coast.

It's a definite mental note.

Stay where you are.

(WHISPERS) I'll be back.

VO: Don't move a muscle.

What else did he spot on the scoot?

CHARLES: Interesting box.

I love the shape of it.

It's heavily worn, but the shape is so irregular.

Opening it up.

There we are.

It says "Trench Art box made from airplane propeller".

That must be 1920s.

From a World War I biplane.

Really interesting.

VO: Ticket price - £25.

CHARLES: Inside, you can see how the box is formed from that laminated propeller.

And what I like about it is there's plenty of wear.

You've got a few chips.

You've got some abrasions on the exterior of the wood.

We call it "Trench Art" but, more than that, it's also treen, and this is a lovely treen...patinated box that I think has real interest.

Why?

Because I've never seen one before.

It's a bit quirky.

Do you know I feel like saying, "Right, that's a propeller.

Turn it round, get it going, and it could fly high."

You never know.

VO: Crikey...

While James is still pondering, Charles is off to see Sarah.

CHARLES: Hello, there.

SARAH: Hello.

CHARLES: Love your hair, Sarah.

SARAH: Thank you.

CHARLES: The polka dots as well.

SARAH: Thank you very much.

VO: Charmer.

There's two things I've seen.

You might know them.

SARAH: OK... One is an attractive Charlotte Rhead style of jug.

And the other item I've seen is what you might call Trench Art.

And it's an aviation box and cover.

So I wonder, if I bought the two together, whether you could do me a deal on the two together.

10% off of both of them.

So the best price would be for the two?

VO: Time to crunch numbers.

CHARLES: There's smoke coming out of that calculator.

VO: But I'm going to guess it'll be... SARAH: 51.30.

VO: Yes!

CHARLES: How much?

SARAH: £51.30.

CHARLES: I think what I will say, and I will be going for the first time, going for the second time.

Going, going, going... Gone.

Thank you.

Sold!

Sarah, thank you very much.

SARAH: No, you're welcome.

VO: Those calculations in full are 31.50 for the vase, and 19.80 for the box.

He'll have those sent on.

Ooh, lordy.

Ah!

Oh, dear.

What about James?

JAMES: What does the weary, weary antique buyer want to find?

He wants to buy a tub-shaped chair.

This is called a Lloyd Loom chair, and it's very clever.

This is paper and wire with obviously a wooden structure.

And then it's woven.

VO: Invented by the American Marshall B Lloyd in 1917.

JAMES: It's got a nice sprung seat.

And the lovely thing about Lloyd Loom is, generally, they're all dated and this is made in March 1939.

You can be reassured about the age, its consistence with the date.

Look at the wear on these nice brass capped feet.

It's done good service.

And if you look at the upholstered seats... Look at that!

Fresh as the day it was made.

Look at those springs.

Lovely and light.

The seat there, just staple it in.

There we go.

Where's the Jessie J?

Here we are.

£45.

Now, if I could buy that for under £30, that would be a profit.

VO: Oh, Sarah!

JAMES: Oh, hello, Sarah.

Hello, how are you?

JAMES: Very good, I've found something.

Oh, lovely.

JAMES: A treasure, look.

Now, I've got a price tag here.

SARAH: OK. JAMES: Chair £45.

SARAH: OK. Now, could that be under 30, Sarah?

VO: Exercising his special powers.

SARAH: I could offer you 10%.

JAMES: 10%?!

SARAH: Yes.

Not 25?

SARAH: No.

Unfortunately not.

What I could do, though, because it's such a beautiful day, I can do it for 35.

35.

SARAH: Yeah.

Sarah, I'll give you 35.

It's only money, isn't it?

VO: Quite.

Sarah's been very kind.

That's yours, Sarah.

SARAH: OK. JAMES: This is mine.

VO: Time to say farewell to Fareham.

VO: And so long to shopping.

Well, for a while, at least, whilst Charles investigates the endangered art of sign-writing... VO: ..close to the town of Emsworth in the company of master craftsman, Terry Smith.

CHARLES: Good morning.

TERRY: Good morning, Charles.

CHARLES: Wow.

You must be Terry.

Indeed.

CHARLES: What makes a good sign-writer?

Oh, I think that patience would have to be at the top, because if you observe how it's done these days, and it's all done at the press of a button, to me that has no soul.

VO: Once there were sign-writers in almost every town, supplying shops and businesses.

And as literacy increased, so did the signs.

But since the 1980s when Terry was starting out on his career, technological changes have rendered his craft almost - but not quite - obsolete.

CHARLES: Looking at you now, Terry, beside this 1920's car, you're almost caught in time doing a traditional thing.

Well spotted.

And using traditional tools and methods still.

TERRY: Absolutely.

It's a wonderful trade.

You can go anywhere in the land, with a little kit box full of color and brushes, and you can earn a living.

And I'm not suggesting you'll ever be a millionaire doing it, but the lack of overheads is second to none, really.

CHARLES: So Terry, what has caused sign-writing to decline?

TERRY: Well in recent years, the computer-generated vinyl is, of course, 'de rigueur'.

Commerce had to move in such a way where a fleet of trucks had to be changed overnight.

And, of course, the humble sign-writer couldn't cope with that.

So the vinyl is king in the high street, or in modern transport.

But there's still a niche for sign-writing, which is why I keep extolling the virtues of it.

CHARLES: Long may it live on.

Absolutely.

VO: Terry's able to pass his skills on to a new generation as a teacher, and just to illustrate quite what an art sign-writing is, many years of training required, Charles is going to have a go.

So in this wonderful studio, I've just seen some amazing signs, and I feel very at home with the fact I can see we've got "antiq"... Yeah.

..on your sign, approaching U-E-S.

It had to be done, didn't it?

CHARLES: What's that wooden stick for, Terry?

TERRY: Well, this is a third arm.

It's called a mahl stick.

And we seem to adopt the German word "malen" - paint - but I guess it was the Old Masters who started using it, you know, before the British.

So the name has stuck.

CHARLES: I'm in the zone, I feel ready to have a go.

So, that in my left hand?

TERRY: In your left hand.

Pot goes on top.

TERRY: That's correct.

And I'm going to rest that like that... That's perfect.

..and make a start.

TERRY: Yeah.

VO: Well, just how bad can this be?

TERRY: Work the brush on the side of the pot.

Yeah.

TERRY: So that you get a chisel on the brush.

CHARLES: Are you ready?

TERRY: Yeah, I'm ready, Charles.

TERRY: Oh, look at that.

Oh, uphill!

That's novel.

Come down there in one sweeping move... Oh, you're doing that.

This is very interesting that you're going uphill, Charles.

You could be unique in this field.

CHARLES: That's better.

TERRY: Now you're cooking.

Yeah.

Oh, you're going to... CHARLES: Sorry, I've... TERRY: That's OK.

I've just dropped a bit.

Hold on.

TERRY: Yeah, that's OK. You've got enough paint on there to do the E and the S, Charles.

CHARLES: (LAUGHS) TERRY: Oh, look.

A serif on the E. Phenomenal.

CHARLES: I honestly could get... Oh, no!

I spoke too soon.

VO: Oh, gosh.

This is dreadful.

Oh, look at that.

TERRY: Well the truth is, Charles, people can still read that as "antique".

You know, it's still legible.

Go on.

He's my mate.

Thanks, brother.

I can do this better Terry, I think.

Yeah, yeah.

Here we go.

TERRY: Oh!

Look at the swerve on that!

VO: It's a swerve, alright.

TERRY: There's a little bit of Gerald Scarfe about that.

CHARLES: All I can say is I think I used too much paint.

CHARLES: It's just dripping.

TERRY: Yeah, don't worry.

VO: Ha ha ha!

That is awful!

Just dreadful.

Oh, dear.

Nothing that a pint of white spirit can't sort out, eh?

From sign-writing to good old writing on the wall, doesn't look good for James.

My chances of beating Charles are probably very slim, but that's the great thing about humankind.

We always have this sort of bizarre, intangible hope.

Hope leads to optimism, to opportunity and sometimes, opportunity can bring home success.

VO: Not to mention a tear to the eye, eh?

VO: Our plucky outsider is off to his final shop, in Southsea.

VO: Once the home of the inspirational poet of 'If', Rudyard Kipling.

If he could only find the shop.

Ah, there it is.

And there's Ian.

Yes, Parmiter's the name.

How does it go?

If you can make one heap of all your winnings... Not there!

..it would amount to £107.40 at this point.

JAMES: Charles did quite well with sugar nips, didn't he?

These are slightly more stylish.

They're continental, possibly Dutch or Swedish.

Beautifully sprung.

Made of silver.

There we are.

Really nice.

VO: Yeah.

Nips noted.

Anything else?

JAMES: We've got a really nice bit of metalware.

It's beautifully engraved.

But the interesting thing is it's signed, and it's got this sort of Kufic Arabic script here, where I suggest it's Persian.

And that would have held something exotic like incense, maybe ginger.

Quite unusual, that.

It's beautifully done.

VO: No price ticket, though.

JAMES: For a precious...

Sometimes, the smell will give it away, but unusual to have a piece signed like that.

And then these are unusual.

Look at these.

They're cast like figures.

The forerunner of soldiers.

And these were known as thins, because they're wafer thin, instead of being three-dimensional.

And this one looks like sort of Kaiser Wilhelm, doesn't he?

A pre-First World War German officer.

You've got the Prussian blue, haven't you?

VO: That would be German, then.

That's rather fun, isn't it?

The sort of dandy offering a bunch of flowers.

Look.

There we are.

So, one side, we see half his top hat and then, the other side, his full top hat.

But what fabulous condition they are.

Unusual.

You don't often see them.

VO: Again, no price.

Quite a list, already, though.

JAMES: We've got an object here which certainly passes the Braxton weight test.

It's a bear.

A brown bear.

Look at him.

Mighty, fierce, and it's a great item.

It's got some age, it's cast, and it's suffered some erosion.

But it's lovely.

Isn't that beautifully modeled and cast?

A little nip out of his ear.

We could say that was done in a fight, couldn't we?

That is heavy, and that's a real contender.

VO: Now, if you can keep your head, as the poem goes, and talk to Ian.

JAMES: I like the bear.

This pot is just fabulous quality, isn't it?

IAN: It is, yeah.

JAMES: And then there's the sugar nips, and the rather intriguing figures here.

I love the blue.

That Prussian blue.

IAN: Yeah, it's lovely, isn't it?

So how much on those two?

20 quid.

JAMES: 20 quid.

That is fabulous.

IAN: The bear... JAMES: Yeah.

IAN: ..you can have for 50 quid, and that's an absolute bargain.

JAMES: 50 quid, OK.

I like to call him a doorstop.

JAMES: Doorstop.

IAN: Out of a country house.

So, country house doorstop.

And this fella, tell me a bit more about that.

IAN: So they often made them out of silver.

And it almost looks that quality of workmanship, doesn't it?

JAMES: Yeah it does.

IAN: But, obviously, it's brass or bronze.

But that's £100.

VO: It sounds like a no, then.

JAMES: What about the sugar nips?

IAN: These would have to be 30.

They're unusual.

Nice styling with the clamshells.

I like a clamshell.

JAMES: So do I.

Right, I'd like the bear at 50.

I'd like the two figures at 20.

I just feel that is a wasted opportunity.

I did spot something else in your shop.

IAN: OK. Can I... Will you stay there?

IAN: I'll stay here.

JAMES: Stay there.

VO: What's this?

JAMES: There it is.

VO: A late Japanese entry.

JAMES: What about that?

What is it?

IAN: It's a sake bottle, or storage jar.

And that's that Japanese rice wine, isn't it?

IAN: Yeah.

JAMES: What a beautiful object to package it in, isn't it?

IAN: Yeah, and it's got, I believe it's the name and address of the company that made it on there, as well.

JAMES: This is porcelain, isn't it?

IAN: Yeah.

It'd be about 1920, 1930's.

JAMES: Now would my remaining money buy this?

How much have you got?

37.40.

Don't forget the pence.

35, and I'll leave you enough for a kebab on the way home.

VO: Rudyard would be proud!

£50 for the bear, 20 for the thins, and 35 for the sake barrel.

Sayonara, James, and shut-eye.

VO: Decision day in the Dales, on Charles' home turf.

That's not chez Hanson, though, by the way.

CHARLES: Ah, you've arrived!

VO: And Charles has shaved for the occasion.

Oh, Lord.

JAMES: You didn't tell me Derbyshire was like the South of France.

I thought it's all rain and mist up here.

CHARLES: Get out of here!

The weather is waiting for our finale.

VO: We all are.

After shopping towards the seaside, our pair have now headed up north to rendezvous at Tissington Hall.

VO: Dropping their purchases off at the auction house in Bourne End, Bucks.

Selling behind closed doors, both on the net and on the phone.

Lovely.

James parted with £158 for his five auction lots, while Charles spent quite a lot more - £301.30.

Let's hear what online auctioneer Simon Brown reckons might have a happy end.

SIMON: George IV clock stand.

Interesting piece.

And, of course, it's got the original paperwork, which is a bonus.

150, 180, that sort of figure.

Interesting Victorian cast-iron doorstop in the form of a bear.

Love it.

Absolutely love it.

I can see that making a couple of hundred pounds plus.

VO: From rags to bruin.

Let's do this thing.

CHARLES: Well, they think it's all over.

Go.

VO: James' Lloyd Loom chair starts us off.

SIMON: 20.

Anybody interested?

Come on.

20, I'm bid.

22, 25.

27.

30.

JAMES: 30.

SIMON: 32.

Come on.

That's good.

That's good.

SIMON: 32, are you all done?

CHARLES: Come on!

SIMON: At 35, I'm bid.

Looking for 40.

He'll get 40.

37, I'm bid.

JAMES: Go on!

CHARLES: Come on!

Yours at 40.

CHARLES: Yes!

Got £40!

JAMES: £40!

40 now... Monkey?

A hand?

A monkey?

No, it's a...

I don't know.

What, what do you...a fiver?

A five.

A fiver.

It's a fiver.

VO: Not going to help him catch up, though, is it?

And it shows people, actually, Lloyd Loom does sell.

JAMES: Yeah...

If it's in good condition.

That one was mint.

VO: Charles' turn.

Will someone go potty for them?

£30, please, for those.

30, I'm bid.

Maiden bid at 30.

Yours at 30.

Are we all done?

Oh, dear!

He looks as though he's running out of steam, Charles.

32.

35.

35.

36... JAMES: That's alright.

CHARLES: Come on!

SIMON: 40.

42.

45.

47, I'm bid.

Yes!

SIMON: At 47.

Are we are all done?

At £47...

He tucked a bid in, just at the very end.

JAMES: He did, he did.

To get me over the line.

VO: Yes, nicely done.

A profit's enough.

JAMES: Very good, Charles.

CHARLES: I'm very happy.

VO: Now for one of James' big hopes, his designer firedogs.

CHARLES: He's got a number of bids.

SIMON: There's 20, I'm bid.

22.

Thank you.

22, now.

They're moving.

22, I'm bid.

Selling at 22 for the dogs there.

At 22.

Are we all done at 22?

JAMES: Oh, come on.

They're marked Benham & Froud!

£22... (GAVEL) That, to me, if they were what they are... JAMES: Well, they were!

They were stamped with the manufacturer's mark.

That's unbelievable.

JAMES: Benham & Froud.

VO: I don't think disappointment quite covers it, do you?

JAMES: Anyway...there we are.

CHARLES: But they had legs... JAMES: Win some, lose some.

VO: Stoic, James.

Charles' Charlotte Rhead is online now.

SIMON: Start me at £20, please, for this lot.

JAMES: 20.

SIMON: 20 I'm bid... JAMES: That's alright.

CHARLES: Come on!

SIMON: Are we all done?

Looking for 22 now.

Oh!

I don't believe it.

SIMON: 20, 22.

25.

25, I'm bid.

CHARLES: Come on.

25, he's creeping.

SIMON: 30, now, online.

One more price.

SIMON: 30.

Yours at 30.

Are we all done?

CHARLES: No.

SIMON: At £30... CHARLES: No.

Come on!

JAMES: Go on, put it down!

JAMES: Put it down!

Put it down!

CHARLES: Sell it!

No!

SIMON: 30, are we all done?

Thank you... (GAVEL) JAMES: Oh!

(LAUGHS) CHARLES: He held it.

He held it!

JAMES: Ah... CHARLES: OK.

Between friends, what's a pound?

Well, I'll tell you what it is, it's a loss, mate.

VO: And he's not had many of those.

VO: But can James' little figurines help him take advantage?

20, I'm bid.

Yours at 20.

Are we all done at 20?

Come on!

Looking for 22.

25.

27.

30, thank you.

30, I'm bid.

35.

James... JAMES: Yeah, it's woken up.

More like Prussian officer.

45.

47, I'm bid.

CHARLES: These are moving!

SIMON: 50, I'm bid, now.

JAMES: Well they're quite rare.

CHARLES: Sell them!

That's enough!

SIMON: £50.

Are we all done?

CHARLES: Sold!

JAMES: 50.

CHARLES: James, I salute you!

JAMES: Thank you.

VO: They look pleased, don't they?

JAMES: That's not bad.

VO: Quite.

What will the online bidders make of Charles' unusual treen?

40, then, to start.

40 I'm bid.

CHARLES: £40!

JAMES: Wow!

CHARLES: Doubled up.

SIMON: 42.

45.

Keep going.

SIMON: 45, 47.

Looking for 47 online.

That's good, Charles.

CHARLES: Go on!

SIMON: 50 then, online.

JAMES: What?

70?

Yes!

Five.

SIMON: Got you at 55.

Looking for 60.

CHARLES: Come on!

SIMON: 60, if you wish.

55.

That's good, James.

SIMON: 60, I'm bid... JAMES: 60.

CHARLES: 60, I've trebled up.

I've trebled.

SIMON: Selling at 60.

Are we all done?

Thank you.

CHARLES: We're landing it, James.

(GAVEL) CHARLES: Sold.

JAMES: Well done.

Not bumpy.

No turbulence.

That's good.

That's very good, isn't it?

VO: You can certainly see the appeal.

VO: Now, what about James' sake barrel?

JAMES: I don't know why I bought it.

It was a moment of lunacy.

50, I'm bid.

CHARLES: Yes!

You've got it!

JAMES: 50!

Looking for 55 now.

Good auctioneering.

SIMON: 60.

Are all done at £60, now?

CHARLES: Wow.

SIMON: Selling at 60.

Are we all done?

I've never seen a sake barrel sell before.

Nor have I.

Be punch drunk, man.

That's amazing.

VO: He knew what he was doing all the time.

Good result.

VO: But how will Charles' other ethnic item fare on the net?

SIMON: £30.

CHARLES: Oh, no!

SIMON: 32.

35.

37.

40.

42.

45.

CHARLES: It's moving.

It's alright.

It's moving.

SIMON: Got you at 45.

Thank you.

45.

47.

50 online.

At £50.

CHARLES: Oh!

JAMES: At £50.

This could be a £100 loss.

JAMES: ..60.

SIMON: 60.

65.

CHARLES: Come on!

SIMON: 70, 75... CHARLES: Keep going!

JAMES: Oh!

SIMON: 75.

80.

Keep going!

JAMES: No.

CHARLES: Come on!

All done at £80, now... No!

SIMON: Thank you.

85.

Yes, 85!

Get the gavel up!

VO: He's trying his best.

SIMON: 95, thank you.

CHARLES: Yes!

SIMON: Still going.

95, I'm bid.

100, I'm bid.

CHARLES: Thank you!

SIMON: 110, I'm bid.

It's still low.

Are we all done at 110?

(GAVEL) JAMES: Oh, blimey!

CHARLES: Sold!

JAMES: Dear, oh, dear!

That's a loss.

VO: When your luck's in, eh?

Could have been far worse.

VO: Which brings us the bear.

The auctioneer's a fan.

SIMON: 50, I'm bid.

Straight in at 50.

CHARLES: 50.

55.

60.

60, I'm bid.

65.

70.

75.

Looking for 80 now, if you wish.

80, I'm bid.

CHARLES: £80!

That's good.

JAMES: 80.

Good.

Good.

SIMON: Thank you, 90.

JAMES: 90.

CHARLES: 90?!

SIMON: Looking for 95.

JAMES: Could be doubling, Charles.

SIMON: 100, I'm bid.

110?

CHARLES: He's got 100!

James, this is one heavyweight bear.

SIMON: £100, I'm bid.

Selling at 100.

CHARLES: Sell it!

JAMES: 120!

Ha ha!

120, thank you.

120 in.

SIMON: Looking for 130.

I'm warming to this bear, Charles.

SIMON: 130, I'm bid.

130.

CHARLES: 130 he's got.

That's massive!

130.

Are we all done?

Thank you... JAMES: Oh, well done.

CHARLES: That's amazing.

JAMES: Thank you.

That's a big number, James.

VO: Exactly.

Not at all grizzly.

Do you think Braxton could be rallying?

This could just be now the bear battle cry.

VO: I think it might be a bit late.

Charles' final lot, now.

Should I be worried?

Yes, I think this has legs to run.

JAMES: Really?

Start me at £30, please, for this lot.

JAMES: 30.

CHARLES: Come on.

SIMON: 30, I'm bid.

CHARLES: Come on.

SIMON: Got you, 32... CHARLES: Got you.

SIMON: ..35, 37, 40.

42... JAMES: There's a rhythm.

CHARLES: There's a rhythm!

50, 55, 60.

65, 70.

75, 80.

85.

£240, now, from the States.

How much?!

24... SIMON: Looking for 260 now.

JAMES: Huh?

CHARLES: 240, the States!

Oh, no!

Thank you, America!

£240.

Are we all done?

(GAVEL) CHARLES: Sold!

JAMES: 240... That was good, Charles.

CHARLES: I don't know... VO: Quite a finish!

I got lucky.

I always get lucky with you, my friend.

I know.

I'm your talisman.

VO: Small consolation, though, James.

He began with £160.40 and, after auction costs, he made quite a profit, and so ends up with £250.04.

VO: While Charles, who started out with £522.54, made - also after costs - a slightly bigger profit.

Which means he wins, yet again, with a final total of £640.58.

All profits go to Children In Need.

Well, it's been a joy, chief, and I hope we do it again.

JAMES: So do I.

And I'm going to try and beat you.

VO: That's the spirit!

How about best of seven?

Ha!

All for now, though... CHARLES: So long!

Farewell!

VO: ..while we reflect on a perfect week.

Well, almost.

JAMES: Wendover is a win for Braxton.

CHARLES: Where are you going?

JAMES: Bye.

JAMES: I am up to no good.

I'm naked from the waist down!

(LAUGHS) CHARLES: I'm still pretty confident.

Oops.

Well, I was.

"This is not a right of way, stay on footpath."

I'm in a car!

JAMES: There we are.

Oh, lovely.

Aah!

That's quite hot.

JAMES: (LAUGHS) I'm just going to give it a little pelvic massage.

JAMES: There we are.

DIANA: (LAUGHS) G-force position.

A position.

Oh!

Ah...

I'm OK!

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