VOICEOVER (VO): It's the nation's favorite antiques experts... Alright, fair enough.

It's a really cute subject.

VO: ..behind the wheel of a classic car.

NATASHA: Make it so.

MARGIE: Here we go.

VO: And a goal to scour Britain for antiques.

Frankly terrifying.

VO: The aim, to make the biggest profit at auction.

But it's no mean feat.

I've lost money!

VO: There'll be worthy winners... Get in there!

VO: ..and valiant losers.

Could have been worse.

VO: Will it be the high road to glory?

Ooh.

VO: Or the slow road to disaster?

Ugh!

VO: This is the Antiques Road Trip!

Giddy-up!

VO: Welcome back to Scotland, and another sitting of our little mutual appreciation society.

MARGIE: Enjoying my trip with you, my dear.

NATASHA (NRS): Och, no, you're not.

MARGIE: I am.

NRS: Stop it.

Oh!

Stop it, Margie!

VO: You guessed it.

Our complementary couple in the classic coupe are Cooper, Margie, and at the wheel, Raskin Sharp, Natasha.

NRS: This is the first time, actually, we've driven with the roof on!

All of a sudden it's warm in here!

Oh, I'm happy.

It's still a smasher.

VO: It certainly is.

And speaking of hoods, did you know that the Mercedes 190 SL was also the motor with which Grace Kelly transported Frank Sinatra in the movie High Society?

Well, did you ever?

Now you do.

Gosh, these wipers are a bit noisy, aren't they?

What's that?

(BOTH LAUGH) VO: She is over 60 years old, I suppose.

I mean the car, not Margie.

Hence no seat belts, having been manufactured before they were compulsory.

NRS: Can I just say, driving around the countryside in a classic car is very Brian Aldridge.

Oh, is it?

Very Brian Aldridge...

Dramatic.

(THEY SING THE ARCHERS THEME) Who's your favorite character in The Archers?

I don't listen to it.

(BOTH LAUGH) VO: Archers fan Natasha from Glasgow, an auctioneer... That's IKEA.. VO: ..is also a Gemini.

In fact, it's her middle name.

Whilst Taurean Margie, a dealer from Cheshire and former model - ha-ha - is more of a Gogglebox gal... Flippin' Nora!

VO: ..has been known to answer to Faye.

MARGIE: F-A-Y-E!

Now that's quite posh.

I'm going to call you Margie Faye from now on.

VO: Margie Faye started off with £200 and lost a bit at that first auction.

She now has £154.48.

While Natasha Gemini, who began with the same sum, has done a wee bit better, and currently boasts £210.52.

MARGIE: Whee!

VO: So, it's all to play for on the second leg of their Caledonian canter.

MARGIE: So, lovely scenery, lovely companion, lovely car.

Just need some profit.

VO: Indeed.

Their journey began at Balfron Station and they ambled towards Ayrshire.

They're now heading back up north before dipping south again into the Lakes and Lancashire, where their final auction's in Shropshire.

The Scottish countryside.

(BOTH INHALE) Breathe in.

Well, the windows are closed, but... VO: Today's goodies are heading to auction over the border in Broughton Astley in Leicestershire.

But we begin in Moffat, the delightful toffee capital which boasts the world's narrowest hotel, where Natasha, having dropped her chum off... NRS: Backing up.

VO: ..is about to experience the amply-proportioned Lothlorien Emporium.

(BELL TINKLES) Oh, that's nice.

An old-fashioned bell!

That's cool.

VO: Not for sale though.

Oh, hello.

Linda, isn't it?

Hello, Natasha.

Nice to see you again.

It's lovely to see you again.

I think last time I was here, I made a profit.

You did.

Definitely.

Do you foresee another one for me?

Absolutely.

VO: So, with Linda's prophecy ringing in her ears... NRS: That's so cool.

VO: ..let the rummage begin.

I absolutely love this kind of place because it is just full of stuff that you could find useful.

Like, if you live at number 50, here's your 50 - you're sorted.

If you just have a spot for a wee hook for your coat, here is a box marked "coat hooks, mixed."

They come from houses that are being stripped out or schools and things like that.

I mean, look at this.

You have that little nook in your house that you just think would be perfect for hanging up your coat when you come in.

Yes, this has seen better days, but you're not going to find that hook in the hardware shop, which is a really nice, original, sort of deco-looking thing.

It just adds a tiny little pizzazz to that tiny wee corner.

VO: Hey, didn't Grace Kelly have one of those too?

What, is that?

Is that actually a lamp?

Oh, yes!

That is!

I love that.

I'm not into yachting whatsoever.

I don't know anything about sailing.

I barely know my port from my starboard, but it's only £39.

I feel like that's a bit of a goer actually.

Because it's a piece of oak, it's really nicely modeled, purely because it's so simple.

These lovely wee enameled metal portholes - is that what you call them, portholes?

- are so cute.

VO: Yes, they are rather, aren't they?

Plus, there's an awful lot of mariners out there.

And this part here is the only bit that's sort of... is a little bit of a peek behind the curtain because everything else has such a nice finish, then this bit at the top here, which is exposed, carved wood.

You can actually see how it's been done by hand, it's not been machine turned.

But I think that this isn't shedwork, I think this has been nicely manufactured.

It's just a little too refined to have been made by someone in their shed.

The fitting underneath the shade, the fitting for the bulb is Bakelite, so it's got that lovely mottled finish.

And there's just a really nice varnish, almost patina, on this oak.

And here you have this switch.

That's also Bakelite.

So, age-wise, are we in the 1930s?

Are we in the 1940s?

It's hard to say for sure.

As it turns out, the wire is broken anyway, so it does require rewiring.

I think it needs a wee flag at the top.

I think that's what it's missing.

Linda did say come back if you need some help.

I think I definitely need help on the price.

I can't believe I like that.

Maybe I need help!

VO: Let's leave her musing in Moffat, and catch up with her companion in the town of Castle Douglas.

Birthplace of the splendidly-named late Scottish actor Brown Derby.

And there's proprietor Kirsty.

Right, right, right, right, right.

VO: Aye-aye, look - a yacht!

I wonder if Margie will be keen.

MARGIE: Oh, look at this little chap.

Bless him.

Look!

Oh, he's having a little doze.

What's wrong with...?

Oh, he's supposed to look like that!

Look, he's got his little head reclined on his little arm, look.

He's got a purpose.

He's a pajama case.

And if we look at his little foot, he's from quite a well-known company called Merrythought, who began in the 1930s.

Hm, quite unusual to see a monkey.

They're usually teddies.

VO: Merrythought are now Britain's last remaining teddy bear manufacturer.

MARGIE: I reckon he's quite old, isn't he?

He's in pretty good nick, apart from his little feet and his little hands.

Which is a bit strange really, because the rest of him is really good.

And he is £48.

Are you worthy of a punt?

VO: Hey, look at me when I'm talking to you.

Can I have a word with you about this?

Yes.

Kirsty, this little chap is £48.

You know, how much could he be?

We could take £10 off him for you.

Hm.

Could I have a little think?

Cuz I've...

Yes.

..seen one or two other things.

OK. 38, that's it?

Not 35?

Yeah, we could do 35 for you, Margie.

Right.

He's...

I'm liking him even more now.

VO: Monkey business almost concluded.

(HE GIGGLES) Let's get off to Moffat, where Natasha's moored the lamp and now has designs on the silver.

I didn't know how that would open, that's fancy.

I know.

I love that.

Look at the wee bagpipe.

Yeah, that's the one!

So, silver brooch, is it marked for silver?

Yeah, it is!

Yeah.

And I think, with Scottish silver, you wouldn't expect it to be marked any other way than just...silver.

Yes, very often it's just marked silver.

NRS: I quite like it, it's nice.

LINDA: It's a nice piece.

So if you're looking for the oldest things in the... Mm.

..cabinet, you're probably looking at the cutlery.

NRS: Right, OK. LINDA: The spoons.

I mean, I've never really considered spoons.

Is there anything that you think could do alright at auction?

Well, the Glasgow hallmark, 1893.

Hm.

Still with the gilding.

Yeah, lovely condition.

Kind of a condiment spoon.

Yes, probably a mustard or a relish.

Mm-hm.

And there's a pair.

There's a pair.

And they're Glasgow.

May I have a wee look?

LINDA: Of course.

NRS: Thank you very much.

VO: That hallmark includes elements of the city's fish-themed coat of arms.

Rather fun.

NRS: Quite like it though, actually.

To have the parcel gilding still intact is nice, isn't it?

LINDA: Uh-huh, yeah.

And there's two of them.

There are two.

£58 in total.

Oh, I don't know.

But if you wanted them, you could have the two for 35.

Really?

That's very generous.

OK, so they can be 35.

Are you familiar with a wooden sailboat lamp?

Oh, yes!

I know the one you mean.

NRS: Couldn't be more different.

Em, that is marked up at £39.

OK. You've been awfully generous with this.

Is there any wiggle room on the boaty lamp.

Of course, yes.

Oh, there is?

OK. What do you reckon?

Em, I think we could do that for 25.

25 plus 35 is £60.

Go on, then.

Let's do it, Linda.

Is that good?

VO: Thanks, Linda!

Now, let's grab the good ship table lamp.

LINDA: There we are.

That's your spoons.

NRS: Oh, you've wrapped them!

VO: Check!

And set out for the next shop.

NRS: OK, here we go.

VO: Don't forget... NRS: Ooh!

VO: ..to buy some toffee first though!

Back to Castle Douglas, where Margie's monkey's a maybe.

Always drawn to these because my grandmother had one.

It's a tantalus and I used to think they were fascinating because you couldn't get at the bottles unless you had the key.

And the person who has the key is the owner or the butler, who would be trusted.

And you couldn't get the bottles out cuz, you know, the people, staff, might just fancy a nip while they're sweeping and hoovering.

So a tantalus was a great idea.

I think it's from the verb to tantalize because you're tantalized, but you can't get the bottles out.

But my granny's was always empty.

(SHE LAUGHS) VO: And signs are she may be after something else.

I'm looking at a brass plaque with "Antiques and Furniture Department".

So that's been in a store somewhere, hasn't it?

I'm looking for safe bets to get me out of trouble.

Let me have a look.

Hm, I really like that.

Do you think that's a better buy than the monkey?

VO: You could always have both.

How much is it?

It is...45, I think.

Kirsty?

(SHE LAUGHS) Hi, Margie.

Yeah.

Quite like that.

You like the sign.

Oh, I do, yeah.

I like signs.

Yeah.

So what could that be?

Em, for the two of them together?

35 on the monkey.

And the sign's 45.

So... Yeah.

..what would you offer on both of them together?

Would 60 do the deal?

Oh, I was thinking 70.

65?

Yeah, we could do a deal at 65.

How sweet of you.

Thank you very much indeed.

OK. VO: Nicely done.

Now down to about £90 though.

That's all I've got left.

Spend it wisely.

VO: OK. Bye bye, Margie.

And your cheeky monkey.

Hello, Natasha!

How's the motor?

I'm trying to get up this hill.

It's all about the clutch control.

I kind of feel like that's a bit of a metaphor.

I'm not in top gear by any stretch of the imagination.

I have made a firm £10 or so after the first auction, but I'm in second gear.

I've moved it up one, tiny bit more money in the kitty.

And I'm getting up those hills, if you know what I mean, metaphorically.

And I have to admit...

I don't think Margie would like me saying this, but I have to admit I don't think she likes being behind.

(SHE LAUGHS) VO: Rabbie Burns would be proud.

I wonder if he was ever in the village of Wiston.

Probably.

NRS: This'll be it.

VO: Yep - keeping on the "Sunnyside".

More metaphor.

And inside Sunnyside, there's quite a few very nice antiques.

Look at that.

Ooh.

I don't pretend to know a huge amount about furniture.

In fact, I know very little about furniture.

But I know that I love Ogee chests.

I would think that we would all aspire to one day have a house in which the proportions of this chest would be appropriate.

I mean, absolutely stunning.

You can house a lot in these and they're survivors.

(KNOCKS) I mean, it's absolutely massive.

A serious piece of wood, serious skill goes into making these.

And that's why you have these apprentice pieces.

Same materials, same age, but all very much scaled down.

VO: Ogee - spelled O-G-E-E - is synonymous with this serpentine, curved shape.

NRS: This one - the proper, functioning Ogee chest - is 400-odd.

And this one - the smaller apprentice piece - is 800-odd.

So you can't even say it's half the size and twice the price.

It's about, what, a 50th of the size and twice the price.

It's quite funny to see them one on top of the other.

It really helps to drive that home.

Same age, same style, same materials, huge price differential.

I can afford neither of them, but still, it's nice to dream and to dream about the house in which this would fit too.

VO: Natasha's funds currently stand at a smidge above £150.

Cue a visit to the slightly more economical department next door.

NRS: Yeah, this is maybe more my price range.

And that is a... Is it wrong to say it?

That's quite a sexy saw!

That is a serious saw.

Sheffield is what I would expect, but in fact it says Philadelphia, USA.

Henry Disston & Sons.

Cast steel warranted.

It's a lovely piece of steel.

Brass bracket at the top here.

I think that's an oak handle, and it's got the lovely original brass screws as well.

So, for whatever reason, I feel like...

..I really like this saw!

Has no price.

Not very good at this, but I might just make an offer.

I could just say, "See your saw?

I'll give you 10."

And see what happens.

VO: Good plan.

She likes it here.

NRS: A-ha.

I have always fancied buying one of these domes.

You rarely get the chance, but that is because antique shop owners don't like to give them away, generally.

They like to have them so that when something comes in that can go inside, they can display it more fittingly.

And I'm loving that.

There's no price on it.

I'm going to pick it up.

It...

The glass is so thin, it's paper thin.

Yeah, I mean, it just...it freaks me out because it just weighs nothing.

(TAPS GLASS) Can you hear that?

It almost sounds like plastic, it's so thin.

This is a hand-blown dome.

The dead giveaway is this - great big bubbles of air.

There's a great big one there and a couple of smaller ones.

VO: Here's Mark, the proprietor.

Hi, Natasha.

How are you getting on?

Oh, I'm fine.

I'm fine.

I'm just looking at two very disparate items.

The two things I'm interested in don't seem to have prices on them.

It's the dome over there with the stand, and the saw.

MARK: I can sell the saw for 30.

NRS: £30.

And I can do the dome for 60.

For 60.

(INHALES) You wouldn't do the two for 70?

Ha!

I'll go 75.

Ach, do you know what?

I think I'll chance my arm.

I've bought neither a saw, nor a dome before.

So, go on, £75.

MARK: Lovely.

NRS: That's lovely.

VO: That's quite a bit more than she wanted.

That's 20 for the saw and 55 for the dome.

Let's hope the bidders like 'em.

Like they said in the movie... Who wants to be a millionaire?

Do you like a ceilidh?

I'd love a ceilidh, but I can never spell it.

Strange spelling, isn't it?

BOTH: C-E-I-L-I-D-H?

That's right, but why not just put K-A-L-E-Y?

That's kay-le.

(BOTH LAUGH) Very good!

That's excellent.

VO: Nighty night, you two.

VO: Today, we start out very close to the Ayrshire coast - a golfing hot spot in the country that invented it.

MARGIE: It seems to be a game that exasperates people.

I know.

You know, it's...you're putting a ball in a little hole, but it's jolly difficult, isn't it?

That's what they say!

(NATASHA LAUGHS) VO: In a nutshell, Margie's shopping yesterday was equally economical, with a brass plaque and a monkey pajama case acquired in short order... Are you worthy of a punt?

VO: ..meaning she still has just under £90 to spend today, while Natasha bought quite a lot more.

A Victorian glass dome, some silver spoons, a tenon saw, and a boat-shaped lamp...

I love that.

VO: ..leaving her with £75 and change to take to the shops.

If they ever get there.

(ENGINE REVS) That's it!

Oh, you're good at keeping it alive!

How do you do... You're going to have to teach me how you do that.

You just listen to it.

You listen to the engine.

I don't have the intuition.

VO: Ha-ha!

Quite.

Margie's in charge of the Merc-whispering today.

Later on, their items will be off to Leicestershire for the auction.

But today's first stop is beside the Scottish seaside, in Prestwick.

Bit blowy, isn't it?

(HE LAUGHS) Nice, calm day in Scotland.

I wonder if it was like this in 1960 when, while refueling at the local airport, Elvis stepped onto UK soil for the one and only time.

And then there's Margie - look, not at all shook up - at Nae Sae New.

What a name.

Got the place to herself, look.

Fantastic.

What have we got under here?

Oh!

VO: Oops, steady!

There's stuff everywhere.

Ooh, what are those?

Are they milk churns?

Oh, you should always look up when you're in an antique shop.

They look quite interesting.

Gary?

GARY: Yeah.

Wherefore art thou, Gary?

GARY: I'm in hiding.

What are these?

Are these farming milk churns or something?

GARY: Yes.

I got eight last week.

I've got four left.

Where did you get them from?

A farm?

Yeah, somebody that had moved into a farm and they were having a bit of tidy out.

There's another one down there.

These are stainless steel.

Yeah, oh.

Shame.

How much are they?

35.

Yeah, if they were a bit older, I'd probably be more interested.

Some milk... No, that's too plain.

Oh, come on!

VO: Just £89 left to spend, remember.

MARGIE: Gary, I'm struggling a bit.

Have you not got anything in your office?

GARY: A bit bare in here just now.

Erm... MARGIE: What have you got?

Hunting cups?

MARGIE: Er... GARY: Danish.

Oh, yeah, they're quite nice.

GARY: They're quite sweet.

MARGIE: Yeah.

GARY: Erm, pens?

Nice things.

Pens, yeah, have you got pens?

Pens?

Yeah, I like pens.

Hang on.

MARGIE: Oh, right.

It's a nice collection, yeah.

GARY: Waterman's, Conway Stewart, and... MARGIE: Yeah.

The other ones are a bit more run of the mill.

MARGIE: Right.

So, er, those are pretty good, and these are just sort of packing it out.

Yeah.

So I'll just say goodbye to the turquoise blue one.

No bother.

Right, and that's a Parker too.

Yep.

And that's a Parker... GARY: Parker pencil.

MARGIE: ..pencil.

I always like fountain pens and I've bought them before and it's a good collector's market.

So we've got the green one, which is the British one.

And that's the Conway Stewart.

Very nice pens and stylish little bands there.

GARY: Mm.

The gold nib.

The lever action to fill it.

The tortoiseshell one, a bit more...a bit chunkier.

And that's the Parker.

As we all know that name, don't we?

VO: Yes, milady.

Founded in Janesville, Wisconsin, in 1888.

MARGIE: And this sort of purpley-red one is a Waterman.

Again, American.

And there's your lever action.

Yeah, they're not antiques, but 60, 70 years old, and they look fabulous.

I think there's some mileage in those.

VO: Sounds like a deal could be imminent.

MARGIE: So, yeah, go on.

Hit me!

(SHE LAUGHS) To give you a fighting chance, 30.

Well, that seems pretty fair, doesn't it?

VO: It certainly does, for those three fancy pens, plus a few others thrown in.

Lovely!

(BELL TINKLES) VO: But while Margie ventures back out into the storm... ..we'll head further up the Ayrshire coast, where it's also blowing a gale.

To catch up with Natasha, at Irvine Harbor, moving seamlessly from shopping to shipping.

Or perhaps more accurately, to the Scottish National Maritime Museum, don't you know, where one famous designer's yachts were not only preserved, but also restored to their former glory.

Meet museum director David Mann.

Ooh, nice.

Look at that!

Hello, David.

Hi.

Hello, Natasha.

NRS: How are you doing?

DAVID: Very well.

You?

I'm very well.

I'm happy to be standing in front of Powerful.

That is her name.

DAVID: Yes, she's Powerful.

Built and designed in 1900 by William Fife III in Fairlie, along the coast from here.

She's a fantastic vessel.

An Ayrshire yacht-builder that became internationally known.

NRS: If William Fife III designed Powerful, what about William Fife I and II?

Were they involved in this business?

DAVID: William Fife I started the business, building some work craft, some fishing boats.

And when that business was kind of struggling a little bit, William Fife III took it on and moved it into this area of designing yachts.

So he was really quite prominent in changing the way yachts were racing, how fast yachts could go.

VO: Fife's reputation was such that he twice built vessels which tea magnate Sir Thomas Lipton challenged for the America's Cup.

Like this one - Shamrock III, launched in 1903.

Magnificent.

DAVID: He took a very scientific approach to how he built the boats and the hydrodynamics.

So, as you can see, she's got a short distance on the water line, but a long distance overall, giving her a faster speed.

He was very influential in putting sails up, lots of sails.

He would put as much sail on them as they could so that they could go much faster.

It's all about the design.

It's all about the build quality.

These boats were always described as fast and bonnie.

Eh, it was the way the term... How nice is that?

I know, it's lovely.

The better they looked, the more people wanted them and the more they developed.

VO: Of course, this part of Scotland is also justly famous for the huge ocean liners that were built on the Clyde in the 19th and 20th centuries.

But, as the museum's varied collection shows, Scots and their boats go much further back.

DAVID: Being an island nation, to transport goods, to do all that kind of work, we needed the boats.

So there were boat-building yards everywhere.

And this area right up to the Northern Isles, very little wood, so they would make boats out of driftwoods, to make sure that they could get from island to island.

These skills have really gone into decline.

There are now fewer shipyards doing this kind of work than there have ever been.

So that's why we started the Boat Building School, so that we've got a generation that can help us look after the boats that we have in our collection.

VO: One of the restoration projects taken on by the Boat Building School is this little beauty.

The Vagrant, from 1884, is the oldest surviving Fife yacht in the world.

DAVID: You've got to take it all the way back, right back to the bare bones.

Replace everything that could rot, that's going to rot.

Working with it and keeping as much as you can so that she's got as much integrity as possible.

So a lot of the planking's original.

Some of the frames will be original, keel's original, and we'll work through that.

She'll look fantastic when she's finished, and she'll hopefully attend a Fife regatta.

Maybe not in the water, but we'll certainly have her on show.

VO: And just to prove that boat building is almost certainly in the blood of every true Scot, it's time for Natasha to test her maritime mettle.

Brace yourselves.

DAVID: So this is the main workshop area.

This is where the apprentices will come in and train.

And this is Connor, and Connor's working on a... Hiya, nice to meet you.

NRS: Hi, Connor.

CONNOR: Hiya.

Connor's working an apprentice piece and making a paddle.

So he's going to teach you how to spoke.

Use the spokeshave and smooth this off.

So what we'll get you to do is kind of hold it there with your thumbs at the back, fingers on the front... OK. ..and you're just looking to lightly...run it up.

And just spokeshave away from me?

Yeah, just... Spokeshave away, yeah.

OK, of course.

Well, that's... you know, that's what I do.

Eh, so... it was like that.

Yeah.

Thumbs at the back, fingers on the front there, and you're just looking to keep this as kind of flat as you can.

OK.

So, thumbs down there?

Yep.

And then...

Fingers at the top... Flat to the bottom.

And then... Oh, oh, I'm feeling it.

Yeah.

Just like that.

Oh, good shave.

So just like that.

OK, hold on.

Oh, that is so satisfying.

VO: Not so much plain sailing as, erm... Oh, forget it.

And could you just do that for hours?

You could.

There wouldn't be much left of the paddle, but you could do it, yeah.

VO: Ha-ha!

Good point, Connor.

But we now present the further adventures of Margie Cooper.

Antiques expert and weather woman.

MARGIE: As you can see, the weather is very blustery so it's making life a little bit more difficult.

Even the car doesn't seem to like it.

As beautiful as she is, she's really quite hard to drive!

Come on, love.

VO: Sport next.

But first, Margie's making for the Lanarkshire village of Overtown and the Garrion Bridge Antiques Centre.

Natasha will be along very shortly, but for now she's on her own.

Just under £60 left, Margie.

MARGIE: What is this?

What is it?

(TINKLING MUSIC) Ooh!

It's a musical decanter.

Why would you want a musical decanter?

So while you're pouring your drinks you've got music playing.

Very odd.

VO: What will they think of next?

I don't even know what it's playing.

(MUSIC CONTINUES) Oh, it's still going.

£24.

Oh, it's all there, look.

Still going.

Made in Sweden.

VO: But of course.

And she's here already, look.

You find some strange things in antique centers.

NRS: Where is Margie?

Ooh.

VO: Hello.

MARGIE: Oi!

Ooh!

You looking for a discount?

You're so weird!

I thought you'd dressed for dinner!

Oh, can I come in?

You can.

VO: Viva Las Vegas.

I think I'm Elvis, right.

You are.

VO: With Margie as Ann-Margret.

Stay there, hold on.

Will you take a selfie?

VO: Now, do let's be sensible.

Eyes down.

Ooh.

I don't usually like pewter.

But...it's Tudric, and Tudric makes it special pewter.

It's a lovely design that was solely sold in Liberty's, which was opened in about the 1870s.

And they started to make Tudric wares in about 1900, up to about the 1930s.

VO: Tudric's chief exponent was the great arts and crafts designer Archibald Knox.

Very collectable, lovely shape.

And the price is £18.

£18 Tudric.

That should be about £30 or £40, surely?

Shall I, er... Shall I have that?

VO: Well, I don't see why not.

Over to Greg, eh?

Greg, can I disturb you?

Hello, hi.

How are you?

MARGIE: I'm alright.

GREG: Excellent.

MARGIE: Right, I've seen that.

GREG: OK.

I mean, it's a reasonable price.

I'm not going to haggle.

But, yeah.

Right, seeing it's you, I'll do it for 10.

Oh, thank you for that.

I'll have that.

MARGIE: Most definitely.

GREG: Thank you very much.

I've seen another item in the cabinet.

Excellent.

Do you want to show me whereabouts?

VO: Crikey.

Quick work, Marge.

So I was drawn to this cabinet.

Could it be that sign?

It could be that, yes!

50% off.

Let's have a look.

Let's have a look now.

And... MARGIE: That little locket.

GREG: That locket here?

MARGIE: Yeah.

GREG: No problem.

And that is how much?

Let us see how much this one is.

Well, this one is 20.

Oh!

And it's yours for 10!

That's plate, but I think the locket just might be silver.

Mm.

That looks like silver to me.

Doesn't feel... GREG: Yeah.

MARGIE: ..like plate.

GREG: It looks, it looks... MARGIE: Can't see a mark.

GREG: No, I can't see one, but...

I think I might just gamble.

It's quite nice.

But even a silver plated one - it really is a very nice one, that.

Oh, go on, I'll have this.

GREG: Have that.

MARGIE: Don't keep dithering.

It's not good to dither.

VO: Certainly not for £10.

MARGIE: Nothing like 50% off.

GREG: It's always nice!

VO: So, that's one happy customer.

That's quite cool.

That's quite cool!

Um, that has to be for a kid, doesn't it?

The proportions of that desk are really small, but it's a strange one.

Oh, look at that!

It has a mirror.

Oh, wow.

That's quite luxury, is it not?

For a kid to have their own dressing table.

Imagine if you were a wee boy or a wee girl and you were getting ready in your room and you could put all your little lotions and potions and hair gels.

Oh!

There is a stag.

I don't think of Stag when I think of a mid-century child's dressing table, but that's cool.

VO: Stag designers John and Sylvia Reid favored recessed grips over handles.

NRS: And the best thing about it, the absolutely best thing about it, is down there is just what you want from kind of '50s furniture - that tapered conical leg.

What does it say on the label?

Child's wooden mid-century dressing table, £35.

Er, yeah.

I foresee a battle between the dealer in vintage furniture and the parents looking for a place for their kid to get ready in the morning.

And if they're willing to battle it out... could be good money in it.

VO: Oh, Greg!

Hello.

We haven't met.

GREG: Hi, there.

NRS: Natasha.

GREG: Pleased to meet you.

Greg.

NRS: Lovely to meet you, Greg.

Thank you.

I'm hoping to save you a trip up to the other side of the center.

OK, yeah.

Em, I took a couple of snaps.

This is the item I'm looking at.

It is a child's dressing table for £35.

OK doke, so it's 35.

What about 25?

Eh, yeah.

25.

GREG: 25, excellent.

NRS: Cool.

GREG: Thank you very much.

NRS: It works for me.

VO: All done.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

VO: Now, wrap up, you two.

NRS: Is it still raining?

MARGIE: Certainly is.

Oh, it is.

Hold on, I'll go around.

Agh.

And freezing!

Oh, it's horrible!

VO: Looks cozy in the car though.

NRS: Smile, please!

MARGIE: Here we come!

MARGIE: Wipers!

Woo!

Wipers.

Off we go!

Woo-hoo!

VO: Next...shut-eye, please.

VO: It's auction time in Broughton Astley in Leicestershire, claimed locally to be the largest village in England.

And why not?

Here at Sutton Hill Farm Country Auctions, buyers will only be bidding online or on the phone.

Auctioneer James Moulds is the man in charge.

What does he think about Margie's canny five lots, which only set her back £115?

JAMES: Now, the pens, I think they will do quite well.

Plenty of collectors for pens and this is quite a nice lot.

Oh, the Merrythought pajama case, yes.

Unfortunately, with this item, the condition is everything and I'm not expecting it to make too much money, but you never know.

VO: Mm.

Now, Tasha paid £160 for her lots.

Thoughts, James?

JAMES: The Stag dressing table, this could be quite a surprise.

I would expect this one to make between £80 and £120.

The silver mustard spoons - again, an item, very collectable.

Silver items always do well in this auction.

You'd expect those to make a reasonable price.

VO: Good-oh!

After setting out from Moffat in the Borders, our pair have wound up in the absolutely gorgeous Lake District.

And a fabulous day for a walk.

NRS: Morning, Margie!

MARGIE: Good morning.

How are you?

You've chosen an amazing spot.

I know, isn't it wonderful?

Have you cleared your head?

I have.

I've had a wander.

VO: Time to pull up and tune in and see how their items get on.

Are you ready for this?

MARGIE: I am ready.

NRS: I don't know if I am.

Er, well, shall we synchronize?

Synchronizing.

Synchronizing...

Right, count us in.

Three...two, one...

BOTH: Go!

VO: And first off the blocks is Tasha's kiddie retro dressing table.

Mid 20th century delight.

A definite profit.

Def... Oh, now you've just... That's the kiss of death.

Thanks very much, Margie Cooper.

Definite, definite profit.

Must be worth £100.

It should be.

Come on.

£50, no interest?

Oh, for goodness' sake.

Start me at 40, then.

Stag, it's a Stag!

It's collectible.

Oh, I feel like 40 is about right.

£40, at 45 anywhere?

Oh, 40's bid.

Good.

Good, good.

That's about right.

45 anywhere?

DEB: 45.

JAMES: 45.

45.

50?

£50.

55?

At £55 bid.

Cheap, though, isn't it?

Are we all settled then?

Last chance then.

Working profit, my love.

At 55.

VO: Lively start on the internet for Tasha.

Oh, I'm so chuffed.

Good.

VO: It's Margie's posh pens next.

They're going to do alright, these.

I know, I can feel it in my water.

And the internet's raced away, at 75 bid.

There you go!

JAMES: The bid's in the UK.

MARGIE: Ooh!

Sorry.

At 75, at 80 anywhere?

Margie!

JAMES: At 75, are we all done?

NRS: You're on fire!

DEB: 80.

£80, with Deb.

Thank you.

JAMES: 85 with you.

MARGIE: Oh, marvelous.

That is nice work.

At 85, at 90 anywhere?

Oh!

Oh, Margie.

Are we all finished?

At 85 and I'm selling then.

Gosh.

Hammer's down at 85, the UK.

Oh, well done, Mr Auctioneer.

VO: Well done, Margie!

Ha!

Nice little earners.

Nice work.

Not laughing now, are you?

NRS: No.

MARGIE: Oh, that's good.

VO: Will Tasha's condiment spoons also cut the mustard?

Ha!

Right, here we go.

A nice bit of Scottish silver.

Yeah.

OK. At £25 for the two spoons.

DEB: 30.

NRS: Oh, right.

30.

Hold on.

Close.

£30 the bid.

MARGIE: £30!

NRS: Oh, no.

JAMES: At £30, are we all done?

DEB: 35.

They're worth more than that.

At 35, are we all done?

All settled then.

You've been a bit unlucky there, Natasha.

I think so.

At £35.

VO: What a shame.

But at least it's even-stevens.

Well, my pulse wasn't racing.

You've been unlucky there.

But I think I've just flatlined.

That's sad.

That is sad.

VO: And talking of sad, Margie's animal-shaped PJ case is looking, well...deceased, really.

NRS: Oh, it's your monkey.

MARGIE: Oh!

Merrythought.

What could go wrong?

Yeah, nothing can go wrong!

VO: Aye-aye.

£20 for it.

Oh, no.

Thank you.

£20 bid.

At £20, at 25 anywhere.

25.

25, with Debbie still.

At 25.

Oh, come on, collectors of Merrythought.

25's the bid.

At 25, are we all done?

No way.

Surely.

At 25, all finished then.

I can't watch!

Are we all done?

Bid's at 25 only.

Oh, well, that's a disappointment.

VO: Fingers crossed he's going to a good home.

Never mind.

At least he sold.

The day is young.

VO: Right-oh.

Tasha's novelty art deco lamp is up next.

What's "yacht" to love?

I think it's... MARGIE: 1950s kitsch.

NRS: ..for a yachting family.

Who want this in the family room.

£20 bid on commission.

Oh, 20's bid.

30 with the UK.

Oh, 30!

At £30, are we all done?

35.

35.

Thanks, Deb.

Yeah!

I think that's on the phone.

At 35, is the bid.

At 35...

I mean, you can't complain.

It's not for everyone.

We all finished then?

Hammer's going down at 35 only.

£35.

VO: She's back to winning ways with £10 more in the kitty.

A small profit for a small yacht.

No, I think it was more of a boat.

VO: Now, now, you two!

Here's Margie's brass plaque, from a department store, probably.

Right, hold on, what did you pay for this plaque?

MARGIE: £30.

NRS: You're off your head.

Am I?

(NATASHA LAUGHS) £20, at 25 anywhere?

25.

Here we go, here we go.

30.

30 bid.

Thank you.

£30's the bid on the internet.

DEB: 35.

JAMES: 35.

35 bid.

40 anywhere?

Profit!

£40 bid, 45?

Come on.

This is a good watch!

At £40, then, I'm selling.

Oh, good.

At £40.

Hammer's down at £40 only.

VO: With that extra £10, Margie may be edging ahead.

I'm happy with a profit of any kind at all.

A profit... MARGIE: Even if it's a pound.

NRS: ..is a profit.

OK. VO: Here's Tasha's 20th century American saw.

Second thoughts, anyone?

If you were at an auction, would you be taken by a saw?

Well, no, I wouldn't.

No.

£18 opening bid.

It's close, close.

At £18, at 20.

Somebody wants it.

At £18, a commission bid.

At £18.

Are we all done?

DEB: 20.

JAMES: 20.

20.

25 anywhere?

Go on.

At £20 the bid.

Hammer's down then, at £20 only.

VO: Yikes.

That's another break even for Tasha.

What can I say?

(MARGIE SIGHS) Next.

VO: Yes, ma'am.

Margie bought this arts and crafts vase for a pinch.

Right, ready for the Tudric pewter?

MARGIE: Yeah.

NRS: Here we go.

Right, come on, Tudric pewter vase.

You only paid £10, for goodness' sake.

£20.

Let's get on.

Yeah, go on.

20 bid.

25, 30 anywhere?

30.

30 bid.

Thanks, with Debs, bid at 30.

Nice work.

35 bid, at 40 anywhere?

45.

45 bid.

At 50 anywhere?

MARGIE: £50.

NRS: Go on!

JAMES: Last chance then... DEB: 55.

JAMES: 55.

NRS: Oh, ho-ho-ho.

60.

60 bid.

65... How's your ticker?

That's exciting!

At £60 and I'm selling.

Last chance.

MARGIE: Yeah.

NRS: Oh!

JAMES: Just in time.

That's great - Oh, he's going on again!

65 is the bid.

At 65.

At 70 anywhere?

Ah!

At 65, and I'm selling this time.

Don't miss it.

At 65.

VO: Look at that, eh?

(LOW WHISTLE) Nice work!

Yeah, great stuff.

Oh, I'm so pleased about that!

VO: Tasha's final item is the hand-blown Victorian display dome.

I love this dome.

I would take the dome home, for sure.

Happily take the dome home.

It's going, it's under the hammer.

And here we go.

We have a bid from the UK, at £25 bid.

I mean, I was all excited then.

I have £30 on commission.

NRS: Keep going.

JAMES: £40, at 45.

The bid's in the UK.

50 on commission.

Oh, 50 on commission.

55 in the UK.

MARGIE: Profit.

NRS: Oh, he's out.

At £60.

At 65 anywhere?

65, still with the UK.

At 70.

70.

70 bid.

Thank you.

Oh, it's all go.

75 anywhere?

75?

Oh, you've made 20.

£80 bid anywhere?

NRS: Yes, yes, yes.

JAMES: At £80.

DEB: 80.

JAMES: At £80.

Oh!

You've got 80.

But it's worth every single penny.

It is!

90?

At 85, still in the UK.

At 85, at 90 anywhere?

Go on.

Are we all done?

I'm selling then, at £85.

VO: Hey, that's a welcome top-up for Tasha's decreasing coffers.

Ho-ho!

Well done.

NRS: Yes!

MARGIE: £30 profit.

Oh, I'm so chuffed!

Yeah, well done.

Good... You don't mean that!

We're not doing too bad.

I do, I do, I do.

Honest, I do.

Honest.

Honest.

VO: Liar.

Ha!

But it's Margie's last item of the day now, a Victorian pendant and chain.

And there's very little between the two of them, so it's exciting!

Right, let's see what happens.

At £30.

At 35 anywhere?

At £30.

The bid is with the... 35.

35 with Deb.

Oh my goodness!

45?

DEB: 45.

JAMES: Thank you.

45.

MARGIE: Oh!

DEB: 55.

55.

At 60.

Oh my goodness.

60 with the UK.

65?

65.

65.

At 70?

That's nice.

At £65, done?

At £65, the hammer's down then.

Oh, that's brilliant.

Well done.

I like this auctioneer.

Make no mis...

It goes and sells then, at £65.

VO: That's another lovely profit for Margie.

We're done!

That's hard to call, actually.

No, I...

I don't wish to boast or upset you, but I think I might have got you this time.

VO: Do you know, I think she might be right.

Natasha started the leg with £210.52 and has increased her pot a smidgen, after auction costs, to £239.32.

Margie began a little behind with £154.48.

But after auction costs, today has £269.08, and has shot into the lead.

The battle is on!

I'm the one with the car keys!

What do you reckon?

Shall we go for a ride?

No, I'm going to enjoy the view.

In fact, I'm going for a walk.

You can go and celebrate with the sheep.

VO: Baa-baa, you two.

Who writes this stuff?

subtitling@stv.tv